Date: Fri, 17 Sep 1999 01:55:16 GMT
From: Joe Camp <idc90@hotmail.com>
Subject: My Hadrian 18 End

My Hadrian
Part 18
By Joe Camp
   idc90@hotmail.com

WARNING: This story contains vivid descriptions of sexual
acts between boys and with men and boys.  The following
story is a work of fiction.  It is a fantasy. Caesar Hadrian
and Antinous are well documented historical figures, as
is their relationship as lovers. Scholars disagree on
certain facts concerning Hadrian and Antinous. Few disagree
as to their relationship. This story is Fiction, but the
author has tried to keep it to what would be reasonable
for beliefs held at that time. Please read the preface for
more information on the subject.  The preface also includes
a glossary of special words used in the story.

This story contains sex between a boy and a man. While
these acts were acceptable by social standards 1860 years
ago, today, they are not. The author does not encourage
or condone sex between adults and children.

  If you are underage, or reading about homosexual acts
between boys or by a man and a boy offends you; find
something else, and delete this file. Most historians
agree the relationship started before Antinous was 13,
probably sometime around age 11 or 12, and continued to
his death, in his late teens or early twenties.  It is
known that Antinous drowned in the Nile. It is debated
if it was a sacrifice or an accident.

  The author wishes to thank and acknowledge the help of
Ronald Staley, in his efforts to keep the general tone of
the story, historically accurate.

The author retains the copyright of this story.  Placing this
story on a web site without the authors permission is a
violation of that copyright.

----------------------------------------------------------------

My Hadrian
Part 18




  As the Emperor was saying goodbye to Gaius, he was
thanked for sending me to his bed. The Emperor didn't even
look over at me as he smiled and told him he was welcome. The
Emperor thanked him for letting his son share his bed, and they
were gone. Except at the chariot races, I have never seen
either of them again. My erastes has never said one word of
rebuke to me about my actions that night.

  This trip has taken us to the wonderful city of Athens. Once
again we toured the whole city, paying special attention to the
fabulous buildings my Hadrian was having built.

  When we arrived the people worshiped the Emperor. It wasn't
like Rome at all. There, what they say with their mouths isn't
always what is in their hearts. At Athens and everywhere else we
went, it was easy to tell the people really love my Hadrian.

  Hadrian inspected the new aqueduct for carrying the much
needed water to the city. Of course it was beautiful as well as
functional, as all Roman aqueducts are.

  The gymnasium was very popular with the boys and men of
Athens. We worshiped at the Olympieum, the temple to Zeus that
my Hadrian was finally having finished after 600 years.

  We prayed in the new temple to Zeus my Hadrian had ordered
built, and in the temple to his jealous wife Hera. Of course we
had to worship at the feet of Athena, and you could tell the people
of Athens were touched that the Emperor revered the Goddess the
city was named for.

  Magnificent is the only way to describe the library!  Hadrian was
lavish in the use of marble in the library. It is one of the finest
and most beautiful libraries anywhere. The marble walls and gilded
roof sparkled. The spacious rooms are beautiful. The paintings
and statuary are by the best artists and sculptors, and I could have
spent hours in front of each one contemplating each stroke of the
brush or mark of the chisel.

  Yes, it was a far different Hadrian than when we were first in
Athens. He was happy even though he was a little ill. The city was
beautiful and well run, and the people loved him for it.

  All the while we were in Athens, I never saw the bedchamber I
was to have. I spent all my days and nights with my erastes. Our
time there had been filled with so much love that we had to
express our love for each other the night before we left, even
though his doctor had advised he not get too excited.

  Hadrian stood up, taking my hands and pulling me to my feet.
Slowly with  an impish grin, he removed my tunic.  I stood there
with my sandals on and the head of my hard cock wet with a large
spot of pre-cum. His tongue lapped the pre-cum from my slit as
he knelt and unfastened my sandals. He arose and our lips met.
His tongue was caressing the inside of my mouth.

  When at last we broke our kiss, I started removing the purple
toga of my Emperor and erastes. I was eager to unwrap that big
cock of my lover. I tossed aside his toga so I could worship his
hard dick. Quickly I slurped it into my mouth, and I savored the
taste of my Hadrian. I had to groan as he lifted me off his cock.

  My erastes sat on the edge of the bed as I removed his sandals
and tossed them aside. The servants would have to find them
later.  Hadrian lay in the center of the bed as I gently rubbed his
chest, feeling the hair, feeling his nipples, feeling my love.

   My Hadrian pulled me to him, taking my left nipple in his
mouth, gently sucking and kissing it. All to soon, he took his
wonderful mouth away, but quickly changed to my other nipple.  I
can't describe how I felt, but the feelings he was giving me took
my breath away.

  I let my hands roam across his perfect chest as I pulled away
from him. I needed to make love to his chest.  I took one of his big
nipples between my thumb and my forefinger, gently pinching and
pulling on it, as my mouth encased the other. My Hadrian started
moaning and twitching against my hand and mouth as his nipples
started getting hard.

  I kissed down his broad hairy chest I love so much. I followed
the path to his pubic area. Kisses placed on each of his big eggs.
Kisses up the shaft of his cock. A lick to clean the pre-cum from
his purple dick-head before placing a tender kiss there too.

  I grabbed the oil pot and slicked my Hadrian's cock. I handed
the pot to my lover and he oiled my hole. I got on top with a knee
on each side of my erastes hips. I reached under me and retracted
my Hadrian's foreskin before wiggling my butt as I got lined up
and guided his huge dick into my ass. I sit down and we both had
to sigh as Hadrian's cock bottomed out.

  My erastes took my dick in his hand and started working and
loving it in time to my up and down movements on his cock. Ever
so often, he would stop jerking on it and work the foreskin with
his thumb, as he squirmed his cock around inside me, and I
pumped up and down. The gods were loving every moment of it.

  We never sped up, but after 15 minutes or so, my Hadrian
screamed, "By the gods! Oh, I love you Antinous!" as he started
grunting and squirting his life force into me. The gods told me
they couldn't stand any more, and my seed was pumping out onto
my erastes' chest as I threw my head back and let out a long loud
scream.

  We toured several places in Asia Minor, stopping a while in
Nicea, before taking a pleasure trip down the Nile. We hadn't
been here in Egypt long before the Emperor told me the disturbing
news. There may be a famine next year. For two years now, the
Nile has failed to flood the crop lands. One more year and people
will die of hunger. Not just in Egypt. The whole Empire depends
on the fertile crop lands of the Nile. It didn't seem possible. It
is so peaceful here, and I have been swimming in the Nile each day.

  I was praying last week at a temple to Hapi, the god/goddess of
the Nile. As I was about to leave, a priest stopped me and we
started talking. I asked him what could be done to ensure good
crops next year. He said only a willing human sacrifice to the gods
would ensure the Nile would flood. He explained how anyone
who sacrifices themselves in the Nile becomes a god.

  When Hadrian saved my life the other day, I knew the gods had
chosen me to be the sacrifice. I knew I was dead when I turned
my head and saw that big cat springing at me, and I couldn't turn
or bring my weapon up soon enough! It had to be the gods guiding
the lance as Hadrian pierced it through the heart in mid flight,
knocking it off course and causing it to fall short.

  Yes, I have been chosen. I have had a better life than anyone has
a right to expect. I have had my erastes, my Emperor Hadrian.

  Yes, my erastes is ill.  By my sacrifice, the gods have promised
he will have years added to his life.  My time as his eromenos is
drawing short. Every day, I become more and more a man.

  By my sacrifice, the gods will be appeased, and flood the Nile
next year.  Emperor Hadrian's Egyptian Province and the Empire,
will be saved from famine.

  The oil in the lamp is almost gone. Yes, I have made my decision.
Today I will fall into the Nile. I can't tell my Hadrian. He would
forbid me. It is starting to get light out, and I feel my erastes'
cock getting firm. Soon he will enter my love hole. One more time
to make love to my Hadrian. One more time to show him how much he
has meant to me. Then a bath before Stephen dresses me in my toga,
and a short walk to the Priests of Hapi.

The End

****************************************************

Postscript

  The author admits to taking many writer's liberties in writing this
story. As stated it is fiction. Also as stated, scholars disagree on
many of the facts concerning Hadrian and Antinous. While Ronald
Staley did check each part for historical accuracy, any mistakes
are solely the author's, as I always had the choice of including or
excluding. I do extend a thank you to Ron for his kindness in
editing this work. He never became cross with me, my mistakes,
nor what I did with the story.

  Little is actually known of Hadrian's and Antinous' relationship.
Therefore, nothing is really known of their emotions for each
other. It is known they had an intense relationship, and it is
mentioned by writers of their time. Most scholars over the last
few hundred years have chosen to ignore their relationship, as it
was seen as defaming one of the good Emperors. It was also
something of a scandal during their own time, not to mention the
current attitudes towards boy/man relationships. It seems to me
not to have been so much because of it being a boy/man relationship,
but more because of their ages and the intensities of their love.

  Hadrian ignored several taboos in his relationship with Antinous.
One was that Hadrian was past 40 when the relationship began.
There are hints that the relationship lasted longer than was
acceptable. I think that Antinous may have been showing signs of
being a man. The erastes - eromenos relationship was supposed to
end at the first sign of a boy's manhood.

  Nothing is known of Antinous' early childhood, except where he
was born. It is not known who his parents were or when or how
he came to live in Hadrian's household. It is very unlikely he was
a slave. Because of the depth of their relationship it is unlikely he
was forced into it. The school described in part 1 was common for
the times, and upper class men often found an eromenos at them.

  All that is known for sure is that he seems to have been in the
household by age 11 or 12. It is known he was Hadrian's favorite
lover by age 13. Scholars disagree on whether or not Hadrian kept
a stable of boys. I think it very likely he did.

  Hadrian's relationship with his wife is also open to speculation.
I think he respected her and treated her with kindness, but for
whatever reason they did not have sexual relations. I do think it
quite possible Hadrian was not only a boy-lover, but a bisexual
which was very common for those times. Man/boy or male/female
sex was acceptable. Man/man sex was not, unless it was with a
slave or captive. Then, only the Roman male could do the
penetrating, never allowing himself to be penetrated.

  To the best of my knowledge, no vase or other art work has ever
been found showing a boy penetrating the man anally. As every
other form of man/man, man/boy sex has been found, it would
make sense to me for it to have sometime existed. There is no
evidence of Antinous penetrating Hadrian either orally or anally.
The author included it because I think it quite likely to have
happened as it didn't seem to bother Hadrian to ignore taboos.

  First, Hadrian did love Antinous, and they did have a sexual
relationship. As any gay man will admit, it would be hard not to at
least think about it happening with your lover. Hadrian and
Antinous were lovers for about 8 or 9 years. Also, Hadrian was
sure to have studied the earlier Emperors. He did have access to
all of the previous Emperors' archives, and the writings about
them. Writings exist showing Nero to have "preferred to play the
part of the woman when with a man." Or in other words he would
have known Emperor Nero was a bottom, even though that
information wouldn't have been known to the public.

  Hadrian would also have been aware that sexual morals have
swung back and forth with time. During Ancient Greece (about
500 B.C.), anal sex with a boy was taboo. It was acceptable for
the man to perform oral sex with a boy. By Hadrian's time, anal sex
with a boy was acceptable. It was taboo for the boy to penetrate
the man in any way, either orally or anally.

  When looking at what was and was not acceptable, there are
several factors to consider. One problem I have encountered in my
research of Hadrian, is that many modern scholars will make a
sweeping statement covering a thousand years or more, without
narrowing it down to what time period and location they are
talking about.

  During Hadrian's time, man/boy sex was socially acceptable in
most of the areas of the Roman Empire. The Jews were also part
of the Empire, and no form of male/male sex was acceptable to
the Jews or Christians, although I am sure it happened. It has been
speculated, although I am not sure I accept it, that the "thorn in
the flesh," the Apostle Paul spoke of was homosexuality.
(II Corinthians 12:7). What his human weakness was really
doesn't matter.

  Whether or not Antinous' death was an accident or a sacrifice is
also wide open to speculation. It could have been either. I am told
the word Hadrian used when writing of Antinous' death can be
translated as meaning fell as in accident or fell as in sacrifice.
It is very likely it was an accident as Antinous had been going
swimming in the Nile for several days before he drowned. It
would appear he was a strong swimmer, but swimming accidents
do happen.

  There are several reasons Antinous might have sacrificed
himself. Hadrian was ill and the Greeks believed that you could
add years to someone's life by sacrificing yourself. The Egyptians
believed that someone sacrificing themselves in the Nile would
cause the Nile to flood properly for irrigating the farm lands the
following year. They also believed that person became a god.
Antinous would have known this.

  If Antinous loved Hadrian so much he couldn't stand to leave
him, he might have seen sacrifice as the best option. Even an
Emperor couldn't stand against the charge of being a homosexual.
That would have meant he wasn't a man and fit to lead the armies.
I believe it quite possible that Hadrian and Antinous were
homosexual lovers.

  One of the writers of the time wrote that Hadrian "cried like a
woman." It is also said that Hadrian would burst out crying for
Antinous years after his death. There are many reasons Hadrian
could have reacted as he did after Antinous' death, whether it was
an accident or sacrifice.

  It was believed that a person who sacrificed themselves in the
Nile became an Egyptian god. It is possible the death was an
accident and Hadrian took advantage of the custom to strengthen
the bond between Egypt and Rome.

  It would have been the custom in Egypt to mummify the body of
the new god. Hadrian would probably have gone along with that.
It is known he forced the Roman Senate to declare Antinous a
god.

  Where Antinous body was buried is not known. It is thought to
have been buried in Rome under a large marker Hadrian had
erected. That was later moved several times over the centuries,
and no one knows where it originally was.

  Hadrian built the city of Antinioopolis and established the
religion, in honor of the god Antinous. The Greeks and Egyptians
were quick to accept this new god and worship him, and the sect
spread to Rome itself. The Greeks because he was one of their
own who made good. The Egyptians because he sacrificed himself
for Egypt. The Romans weren't quite so open to him.

  Hadrian lived 8 years after Antinous' death, and it has been
reported he grieved the rest of his life. It is said he would often
burst into tears, crying for Antinous.

  So, was Antinous' death an act of love or an accident? Each will
have to decide for themselves.

The End

Comments: idc90@hotmail.com    Flames Happily Ignored  :)

I answer all e-mails.  If you should write and not get an
answer, it is because I didn't get it.  Hotmail sometimes
gets overloaded. Please try again.

Thanks for reading,
Joe Camp
1999