Date: Wed, 13 Apr 2011 15:11:53 +0000
From: Jo Vincent <joad130 (at) hotmail.com>
Subject: Tom Browning's Schooldays

			 Tom Browning's Schooldays

				    By

				   Joel

This story may have echoes for many of you who have read the classic tale
by Thomas Hughes of life in a British Public School - i.e. a private school
- in the 1840s.  His tale explores the social mores and habits of the time
and I hope my story may do the same but extend some of the sexual sub-text
which Hughes cleverly skirts.  If your sensibilities are such, or you are
forbidden to read literature such as this by your culture, creed or class,
then this is not the site for you.  For all others, read on.

All my stories so far have appeared on Nifty but are also gathered on
awesomedude.com under Joel.  This yarn may have links to others in the
collection for the discerning.  My email for comments, etc., is [coded]
joad123 [at] hotmail.com

				Chapter One

     Some of the characters:
Mr Sam Browning  - Lincolnshire farmer and horse breeder at Careby Hall
Mrs Louisa Browning - his wife: n‚e Crossley
   Torquil Browning  - Captain of Horse [32]
   Terence Browning  - Cornet of Horse  [30]
   Harriet Browning [Hatty] [29] - married Rev. James Canning: twin sons [6]
   Margaret Browning [Peg] [26] - married Ranald Foster: 1 son [3]
   Thomas Browning  - schoolboy [14]
Colonel William Browning  - Regimental Commander 'Browning's Horse'
Rev. Dr Alfred Dodd  - Rector of Careby Magna
Aunt Matty [Dodd] - his wife nee Browning
Sir Digby Wright Bt - speculator
Aunt Fanny [Wright] - his wife nee Browning
   Rosamund Florence Wright [34]
   Nicholas Wright [29]  - Architect [New York]
Robin Goodhew - groom [14]
  Philip Goodhew - his brother [12]
  James Goodhew - his brother [10]
Rowley Roberts - coachman [18]
Enoch Barker - blacksmith
  Jacob Barker [15]
  Isaac Barker  [17]
Hon. George Lascelles - schoolboy [16]
Theodore Davis  - schoolboy [16]
Japhet, Ham Barney  - servants at Ashbourne School
Rev. Mr Ridley  - Headmaster
Rev. Mr Martin,  Mr Dimbleby, Mr Pratt - Masters

			      September 1843

     "And you look a sturdy young fellow without a doubt.  Beak says your
name's Browning.  Is it?"

     I looked at my inquisitor and saw a sturdy fellow, too.  Taller than
me.  Tow-haired with a smiling face and the hint of whiskers in front of
his ears.  I judged him to be about the age of the stable boy who usually
looked after my horse at the Hall.  Probably sixteen.

     I had better answer.  "Yes, my name's Browning, Thomas Browning."

     The stocky one thrust out a hand.  "And I'm Lascelles, George
Lascelles."  I took his hand.  A quite rough hand and mine was shaken
vigorously.  He let go and indicated the other youth.  I looked at his
companion.  Not quite so stocky, in fact a mite taller, with a mass of
black hair vainly plastered down as it was springing from the grease in
places. "And this is Theo Davis, my best friend and study mate."

     A second hand, slightly less rough, was shaken and Theo smiled and
bowed his head.  "Pleased to meet you, Tom."  I bowed my head back.  "Must
be strange your first day here.  Not been to school before?"

     I shook my head.  "No, I have been taught by our rector, Dr Dodd, but
my brothers were here some years ago."

     They looked at each other.  "No Brownings here that I've known," said
George.

      Theo shook his head.  "Not while I've been here and that's six
years."

     "No," I said quickly contemplating what it must have been like to be
away at school so long, "Both my brothers are much older than I am, and I
have two sisters in between me and them."

     "Browning," mused George, seemingly happy with my answer.  "I know the
name.  Not related to Colonel Browning are you?  Colonel Browning's Horse?"

     "That's my uncle," I said, "He commands a cavalry regiment.  My
brothers serve under him."

     George gave a chuckle.  "Then your father is Mr Samuel Browning.
Farms in Lincolnshire and breeds the best horseflesh in the country!"

     I nodded.  "You know my father?"

     George laughed.  "I came down here to Ashbourne in my father's old
carriage drawn by two of your father's horses!"

     I smiled.  "And I rode here from near Stamford with my two companions
on three of my father's good steeds."

     "Stamford!" interjected Theo.  "We are almost close neighbours.  I
live in Peterborough."  He sniffed.  "I came by three different stages,
through countless villages, and with old nags drawing each of them."

     George laughed.  "My poor Theo.  I suggest you do not become a Bishop
who also has three sons and two daughters and knows not where the next
penny is to come from."

     Bishop?  Is Theo's father a Bishop?  Of Peterborough?  I was not to be
enlightened.  Yet!

     "Come, no more questions," said George, "We must give young Thomas a
welcome and tell him what will happen here."

     Theo nodded and pointed to the three hard chairs by the small desk
against the wall.

     "This is our workplace," He pointed then to a curtained bed. "And
George and I sleep there and you have the truckle bed from under."  He
smiled.  "We are no longer fags and can now share a room.  You know the
system?"

     Yes, I had been informed by my brother Terence that the arrangements
in Mr Ridley's House was that each pair of older pupils had a younger pupil
as a fag, or general dogsbody, who, instead of sleeping in a dormitory with
his fellow age-group, as in most other Houses, was bedded in with his
elders.  For some reason Terence had laughed when he told me this and said
I should watch out for cold nights.  Thinking of this I looked around.  Why
cold?  There was a small grate ready laid with kindling with a tuft of
straw under to catch light easily.  There was a small hod of what could be
coal by the side.

     George Lascelles must have seen me looking.  "Yes, young Tom, that's
your first job on a cold morning.  To get a good fire going..."

     "...George," Theo Davies interrupted, "You forget.  Young Tom's first
job in the morning is to empty the pots."  He grinned at me and tweaked up
an edge of the bed curtain.  Three chamber pots were in evidence in a small
cupboard by the wall.  "And watch you don't spill a drop or Usher Pullen
will redden your hindquarters."

     I stared at him. Then remembered what Torquil my older brother had
told me.  As well as the tutors there were ushers to keep the boys in order
and, although of the lower classes, they should be dealt with politely, or
your backside would feel the sting of the hazel switch they carried as the
badge of their office.

     George laughed.  "Don't worry the poor boy so."  He waved his hand at
Theo.  "Theo jests with you.  Pots are emptied by the serving boys.
Anyway, arse-whipper Pullen sleeps sound and late as he partakes of any
small beer we do not consume with supper."  He grinned, tipped his hand as
if ready to quaff from a pint pot and winked at me.  "My fag- master last
year, the unsaintly Billy Parsons, always left at least a quart of ale
outside the usher's lair to help his slumbers."

     Theo was nodding. "A good service he did us...."

     "But not himself," George interjected.  "As big as he was he got a
birching on his last day here for being found gaming in the Hat and
Feathers and I did hear his father was full of rage and sent him straight
to Portsmouth."  He laughed. "May the Lord rest his soul as he's in the
Navy now.  A Midshipman I hear."

     Theo was looking at George almost open-mouthed.  He shook his head.
"I did not know he was birched.  I knew he was leaving anyway.  You may
remember my father sent a chaise three days early as he had forgotten the
date we finished Summer Term so I missed that excitement.  And he's in the
Navy now?"

     "Yes, my cousin James Mayhew is the curate of the parish where Mr
Parsons is the squire and sent me a letter as he knew I had been Billy's
fag."

     I was learning things fast.  I knew about gaming.  I assumed Billy had
been found gambling on cards.  In the next village to us there was gambling
on cock-fighting and I had heard of money being won and lost in fair
amounts. A son of one of my father's friends had been shipped off to the
Americas because he had ended in debt.

     "But to more important things, eh young Tom?  You have a cupboard
shared with Theo for your clothes."  I nodded, my saddle-bags with some of
my clothes were still below.  I had left them with the Matron who looked a
kindly soul.  I would have to rescue them and get Robin to bring them up.
"I see no bags," he said looking around.

     "No, I left them in the Matron's room when she gave me and my
companions some food before Rowley went."

     George looked a little puzzled.  I would have to enlighten him.

     "I travelled with two companions.  Rowley is Father's second coachman
and he has left already to return home.  My other companion is Robin
Goodhew.  He is to stay as groom in the stables and to look after our
steeds as well as any others."

     "Ah, I understand," said George.  "There was a shortage of good help
last year when Mr Ridley had more pupils arriving with their own horses
than he had thought."  He laughed.  "Even I had to wield a shovel when I
wished to borrow Bertie Cassel's mount."

     "You like to ride?" I asked.

     He grinned "A great passion.  I miss it so much but father says I
would spend more time riding than studying if he allowed me a steed here."

     Well, I think I might have a bargaining point.  But keep for later.

     I turned to Theo.  "Do you ride?"

     He looked a bit glum.  "Badly.  I only wish I had more opportunity."

     "Then you must both share my mount.  He is a fine chestnut gelding I
have had since I was ten years.  He is well-schooled and quite amenable to
others riding him."

     I knew I had made two good friends then.  They both grinned happily.
But there were other things to be dealt with.

     I had noticed there were two small chests beside the bed.

     "My chest has also arrived by the mail coach so Matron told me," I
said pointing to the two.  "She said the boys would bring it and my saddle
bags up."

     The grin never left George's face.  "That would be young Japhet and
his brother Ham.  A fine pair of lads."

     Yes, I had seen the pair who were busy carrying things into the big
kitchen adjoining the Matron's room.  I had heard her say the name Japhet
and had noted the brawny young lad, I would think a year or so older than
me.  The other lad with a tray of pots must have been Ham.  He was a bit
younger I would say, about my age.

     My thoughts were then interrupted by a knock on the door.  George
bellowed out "Come in!" and two lads almost staggered in hefting my trunk
on their shoulders with a bag in a hand each.

     "Oh, Mr Lascelles, sir!" the bigger one said loudly as the pair
dropped the bags, carefully I noted, on the floor and set the trunk down
beside them.  "What is in this box?  It weighs like the Ark of the
Covenant!"

     "Good job it is not that," said Theo laughing, "Or you would be struck
dead!"

     I recognised the Biblical allusion as Uncle Dodd had preached on that
text several times.

     "I know," the lad I assumed was Japhet spoke up, "We said we would be
dead by the time we reached this room with the weight of it."

     "But you will be rewarded no doubt for your efforts," said Theo.  I
knew I had to pass some coins to them.  But Theo was not finished.  "You
must be introduced.  This is our room-mate and companion..." He looked at
me and screwed up his nose.  "...and fag."  He swept his hand in
acknowledgement.  "Mr Thomas Browning meet Japhet and Ham who know all our
secrets and we know theirs."  I was certain the two lads blushed a little
but they also grinned and bowed their heads in greeting.

     "Sir," said the elder, smiling most winningly at me, "I hope we will
be good and faithful servants."

     I said I hoped I would not be a too-demanding master much to the
amusement of Theo and George and handed a shilling piece to Japhet.  "For
you both." His eyes as he saw the gift opened a little wider.

     "Thank you most kindly," he said and gave me an almost military
salute.  "Good day, sirs, we must be back to our duties or Matron will be
ready with her cane."

     They were off in a trice closing the door carefully as they went.

     "Well, young Tom, you have made two allies there."  Theo laughed and
caught hold of the strap holding my chest securely closed.  "My, this is a
weight.  Not quite the heaviness they implied but not just more clothes."

     "No, my mother said all boys are hungry and I was no different from my
brothers.  I wager she has packed extra fare."

     Noting the questioning looks on their faces I quickly undid the strap
and felt in my jacket pocket for the key.  I was right.  As well as my best
Sunday suit of clothes, some linen and stockings, two pairs of boots and
other things, were two canvas bags.  These revealed two fine smoked hams
wrapped in linen.  Our noses wrinkled at the heady aroma as the first was
revealed.  Later, I thought, and replaced them in their bags.  Also in the
chest between two books was a small bottle, wrapped well against breakage.
It was labelled 'For Medicinal Purposes Only' but I knew it was good brandy
and had been placed there by my brother Terence who had been at home on
leave when I left.

     George seized the bottle.  "We have a little drunkard to keep in
order."  He held the bottle up for Theo's inspection.  "I say we confiscate
this for our own usage.  It will be useful to rub into our bruises when we
have been kicked at playing ball with those ruffians in Mr Pratt's House."

     Theo was not to be outdone.  He tried to take it from George's grasp.
"I think I have a bruised throat which needs a quick cure."

     George handed the bottle back to me.  "His father may preach against
the sin of drunkenness but the son never says no to a little strong cordial
when offered."

     "I think I would have to examine his bruised throat first," I said as
I wrapped the bottle again. "Perhaps on a cold evening.  My father says a
drop does no harm when in a hot posset.  And I do not believe always that
ariston men hydor."  [Gr: 'Water is best'.  Pindar]

     George looked puzzled but Theo was quick off the mark.  "My, we have a
real little philosopher here and speaking good Greek." He prodded George in
the side.  "You do not recognise that, eh?"  George shook his head.  "You
read Greek already?" Theo asked me.

     "Yes, I have studied it and Latin with my Uncle Dodd now for some four
or so years."

     "Your 'Uncle Dodd', you said," It was his turn to look puzzled, "So
the Rector is your Uncle."  He had a good memory!

     "Yes, he is married to my father's sister, my Aunt Matty."  I thought
I had better explain.  "Uncle Alfred was a Fellow of his College at
Cambridge but met my Aunt at a County Ball and when he married her had to
give up his Fellowship.  My grandfather had the gift of the advowson and it
was vacant so he gave it to Uncle.  This was many years ago as my
grandfather died before I was born."

     Theo smiled.  "Is he the Dr Dodd of 'A Latin Primer'?"

     I nodded and smiled back as Theo shook his head in wonderment.  He
laughed.  "My tutor before I came here battered my head if not my brains
with a copy of that book.  I still have it."  He went over to a shelf which
held an assortment of books.  He withdrew a rather tattered copy from under
some manuscript books. "Here it is.  Well used as you might see.  We do not
study it here but I make use of it as it contains good explanations of hard
cases."  He waved the book at George.  "And I have battered your head with
it, too, when you haven't perceived the difference between Perfect and
Pluperfect."  He shook his head again.  "Latin is not a strength for our
good George, eh, my fellow?"

     George's smile never left him.  "I have other strengths I hope.  I can
calculate well and I write a fair hand but as I want to be a good Army man
what more do I need."

     Theo reached over and put an arm round George's shoulder.  "You will
be the best soldier Her Majesty will ever have."  He winked at me.  "Even
better if you gain an entry to Colonel Browning's Horse!"

     "He would have to be a good rider," I said, not letting the
conversation best me.  "My Uncle only takes the finest, but I could act as
his Recruiting Sergeant and test this applicant's skill."

     George chuckled.  "I believe I am going to like this whipper-snapper
even if he does smell more of horse than a good school lad should."

     True!  I had dismounted barely three hours ago having ridden for two
whole days and a half and slept one night in a barn as we could not find a
good village inn for accommodation and Rowley had said that would be more
pence in our pockets.  Matron had sniffed when I and my companions had
appeared in her parlour and we were ushered straight out into the kitchen
so her nose was not too offended.  Living with horses so much I was used to
the aromas but my mother had always kept me washed and clean in the house.
I must now make amends for my smelly and unwashed state in my room-mates'
company.

     "I must apologise if I offend your patrician nostrils but all I have
had for washing water these two days is my head under the pump.  What do
you advise?"

     Theo was in charge.  "In general we have to rinse ourselves each day
in the bathing room below.  There is a tank of water there but it is cold
most days but two days a week there is a second tank heated by the stove
and we can bath if needed.  As there are over forty-five of us in the House
baths for some are somewhat rare."

     "Don't look at me like that," interjected George, "I had many a bathe
in the river last term."

     "But you did let the mud dry far too long after that ball game you
played before Easter."

     "Good mud never did anyone any harm," grumbled George, "Just because
Billy Emerson and Jonty Williams stripped me off and held me under the
pump..."

     "...And we didn't laugh at your shrunken stalk as you accused us."
Theo chuckled.  "Poor boy, all dripping wet and then scattered us all with
the loudest fart which would have brought down the walls of Jericho!"

     "It was not fair.  You mocked me.  I was cold and wet and we had that
vile cabbage at dinner and my poor stomach was disordered."  Although
George was grumbling I knew he wasn't really angry.  These two were real
friends I could see.

     "No George, and as far as I know your stalk was not shrunken.  At
least you knew it outmatched Billy's even at your age then."

     Interesting, but I was getting no nearer my own needed experience of
water.  Hot even better.

     Theo had finished baiting George.  "Now let's get you settled..  You
can wash in here.  I will whistle for Japhet and he can bring a pitcher of
hot water with a basin."  He pointed to a hook behind the door.  "There are
two good towels there but you should have towels packed as ordered."

     True.  In the bottom of my chest were towels wrapped in brown paper.
Theo went to the door and gave a piercing whistle.  A few moments later a
grinning Japhet appeared and was given strict orders of what to obtain from
the kitchen.  Ten minutes later both Japhet and Ham appeared with pitchers,
a large basin and a bag containing washcloths.

     I was in a bit of a quandary as the boys left.  Should I strip off
completely in the presence of these two.  I knew I was not yet fully grown.
I had had many opportunities to compare myself and my friend Robin together
and with Jacob and Isaac the two younger sons of our blacksmith.  They were
older and well-equipped as they were wont to say.  But Theo must have
realised my hesitancy.

     "George," he said, "While young Tom is washing I can see if you have
prepared tomorrow's passage which Mr Ridley has already set.  You know he
does not like slackness so we must be ready."  He laughed.  "We had better
tell young Tom before he starts."  I had already removed my leather jerkin
but stopped unbuttoning my shirt.  "You will be given each day lines from
the Latin book you are studying and must prepare a translation.  Neither Mr
Ridley nor the under-masters permit a crib to be used.  They can spot a
copier straight away.  We have to make our own effort.  The passage on the
board ready for us tomorrow is from Virgil and we have but six lines to
make sense of.  You will find your tutor will have you up before him
tomorrow to get your measure then will set you some Latin and some Greek
and then arithmetic." He laughed again.  "But be careful and do not be too
cocksure as the work given you will be more difficult. Do you know yet
which form you will in?"

     I said I did not but I had to see Mr Ridley at four o'clock as I was
new, perhaps I would be questioned then.  Theo said I must be important to
be seen by the Head Beak but then I was entering the school at rather an
advanced age.  Fourteen.  An advanced age?  But then as Terence had told me
most boys were sent from home to school from the age of eight or ten.  As
Uncle Dodd had supervised my education so far that was not thought
necessary but he and Mr Ridley had been students at College together and he
said I would learn more about human beings if I went away to school for the
rest of my education before going to University.  He had laughed as he said
'human beings' and Terence had laughed as well when I told him what Uncle
had said but would not say more.

     As I went on unbuttoning they went to the desk where they were soon
deep in conversation.  I continued taking off my shirt and undershirt then
pulled off my riding boots and knew my woollen socks would need washing,
too.  My riding britches came off next and I cast a quick glance at the
pair before I lowered my small clothes.  They were too engrossed in their
task.  I heard Theo say 'Omnia Mercurio similis' and said to myself 'In all
things like Mercury' as I stood quite naked and reached for the washcloth
to dip into the basin.  My sister Hatty had given me a piece of
sweet-smelling soap some time before and this gave a good lather as I
swabbed my face and arms.  I towelled these parts dry then attacked my
armpits, chest and downwards.  My newly grown patch above my pizzle caught
the foaming soap and I quickly cleaned there and to the tops of my legs.
My legs were still hairless, not like those of Isaac Barker whose bare legs
when clad only in his under-clout and leather apron before the forge were
thickly forested with black curls.

      His younger brother Jacob was not so adorned yet, being not much
older than me but had a fine dusting of black hairs on his thighs which I
envied.  "You will wake up one morning and find you'll be as hairy as that
monkey in the circus show we saw last year," he said to me when I confessed
my lack.  He had then laughed.  "But you can now do what that monkey did
next!"  I had not better dwell on that as thoughts, I knew, had effects.  I
dried my middle then washed down my legs.

     George must have wearied of the translation as he thrust down the
pencil he was holding and turned on his chair.  He noted me drying my legs.
"Your back, young sir," he said, "Do you require assistance?  I have that
task each week for Theo here.  He says I am uncommonly gentle."  He stood
up and without further ado took up the washcloth and my back was soaped and
rinsed quickly and gently.  "Part your legs," he ordered.  The washcloth
was applied between my legs and I was cleaned there thoroughly, something
only I had done before.  After I had dried that part George stood in front
of me as I held the towel before my nether parts.  "Stand up straight."
Another order.  He reached out and took the towel away.  I was shocked.
"You were standing there like a delicate maiden surprised at her bath."  He
looked me up and down.  "My, you are demned well set up."  He reached out
and grasped my upper arm. "You have a muscle there."  He flexed his arm and
even with the cloth of his shirt covering it I could see he was
well-muscled.  "I have two brothers to wrestle with and they make me carry
all the heavy sacks on our farm."

     Theo had turned on his chair and was also surveying me in my
nakedness.  "Farm!" he snorted, "Milord Harford owns half of Westmoreland
and this rascal has been put to work to stop him being lazier than he is."

     George just laughed again.  "Too true.  But you, my fine fellow, where
did those muscles come from?"

     I suppose I hadn't realised but then I only had the blacksmith
brothers, Robin and the other grooms to compare myself with. "I've been
helping in the forge on the estate," I said, "I was allowed to pump the
bellows when I was ten and for the past two years I've been wielding a
hammer and tongs there, too."

     "Bless my soul!" said George, "Another good artisan like me.  I've
been helping the saddler and harness maker in our village for my sins as
well."  He pointed at a couple of belts hanging on a nail near the head of
the bed.  "All my own work and I have sown the leather on these slippers of
mine."  I surveyed a rather large foot which was lifted up encased in a
fine soft leather slipper. "I have promised Theo a pair for a New Year
present."  He looked down.  "Your feet are not too dainty and shouldn't
take more than two good hides and a year in the making..."

     "....Take no notice," Theo said, "I will command him to make you a
pair.  I have told him he should open a shop here in Ashbourne and make
himself a small fortune in repairing all our footwear cheaper than that
villainous Old Man Potts but we must remember we are the sons of gentlemen
and must not enter trade." This last said with much bowing and scraping and
unctuous looks.

     George was laughing again.  "But Theo here could do a good trade in
play-acting.  All London would be there to see him at the Lyceum!"

     I was being ignored and was still standing naked having had my
protecting towel taken which was still in George's hands.  And, my unruly
pizzle was having a life of its own.  George smiled as he noted the slight
uncurling. He said nothing and handed me back my towel.

     "Get yourself dressed young Tom and unpack the rest of your things and
after that we'll take you along the rooms so you can meet your new friends
and neighbours."

     I was left to my own devices then as Theo insisted that George return
first to the translation.  Still naked I undid my bags and arrayed my
possessions on two shelves in the cupboard.  Three pairs of small cloths,
four pairs of woollen stockings, two pairs of knee britches and two pairs
of light shoes.  My undershirts and shirts were wrapped securely in my
chest with clean riding britches and a hunting jacket which was newly made
as a present from my Aunt Matty plus some good leather boots.  There was
also a bundle of books which I would put on the shelf above the desk later.

     I had noted that both George and Theo were wearing long trousers.  But
the list for me had said knee britches only.  My favourite suit of jacket
with the big collar and long trousers was left at home.  Mother had said I
would no doubt outgrow them before I appeared again at Christmas but not to
worry.  I would have to ask George when I would be permitted to have the
longer ones to wear.

     I was busy and not bothered about dressing.  George was bored with
work again.

     "This boy has no shame as he parades his nakedness before us," I heard
him say.  "I think we should keep him like this as he resembles those naked
cherubs in that Romish chapel painting."

     "George!"  Theo sounded rather exasperated.  "We do not need a naked
cherub however beautiful he may be..."  His voice died away.  He repeated
"...however beautiful..."  and stopped.

     "He is...." whispered George as if he didn't want me to hear.

     I thought I would give them a bit more to think about.

     I held up my leather jerkin. "Please sir," I said feigning innocence,
"I have a slight tear where the leather here is worn.  Perhaps I might
crave your expert attention and ask for a repair."  I lifted it higher so
my lower regions were in full view.

     "Bless me, boy," George said shaking his head at me, "Yes, I will put
a stitch in it for you and do get dressed before..." He hesitated.
"...before some oaf comes knocking on the door."

     I complied with that request and pulled on a clean set of small
clothes and slipped my arms into a fine cambric shirt in which my sister
Peg had stitched my initials.  My dark cloth knee britches were next and
then my stockings to my knees.  I put on my new waistcoat in a plain Scotch
cloth which went over my shirt and buttoned quite loosely 'as you are still
growing' my mother had said.  I chose a pair of light boots and had laced
these by the time Theo had managed to get George to understand that 'cum
rota praecipitem et procursu concitus axis' was not a complete sentence but
needed part of the next line 'impulit effunditque solo' to make full sense.
[When the wheel and turning axle thrust him headlong and stretched him on
the ground.]

     "George," said a rather exasperated Theo, "These bloodthirsty Greeks
should be of great interest to you.  Look, in these last lines Turnus cuts
off his head." [Turnus secutus...]  He was obviously enjoying himself.  "Mr
Ridley delights in setting such passages knowing what we heathen boys are
like."

     "And only heathen boys speak Latin," said a slightly disgruntled
George.

     I couldn't help it, I laughed.  "My Uncle Dodd says the only ones who
speak Latin now are the Catholics in Rome and in their churches.  And the
young boys in the Pope's choir sing in Latin.  He said they sing like
angels but he saw them kicking each other after their procession out."

     George was not mollified.  "We are not Catholics in Rome and I would
rather speak good English."

     Theo was intrigued "Your Uncle has been to Rome?"

     I nodded.  "He has many tales of the journeys he made when he was a
student and after Bonaparte was defeated.  He went once as tutor to two
sons of some nobleman and had to spend much time keeping them out of
taverns."

     George was interested now.  "I wager he had to keep them from the
wenches, too.  I have heard tales of uncles who made those pilgrimages as
they called them and I know my brothers were vexed they were not allowed to
go abroad.  Augustus said it was because our Uncle Ralph caught the French
Pox...."

     "George!!" Theo almost shouted, "These are not things for our young
friend's ears."

     I smiled.  I knew what George had said.  Uncle Dodd's second son,
Lancelot, was our local physician and when he thought I might be interested
in following that profession had lent me a book of diseases and I asked him
many questions.  Although I was but thirteen then he answered them without
demur as he knew I had witnessed mares standing at stud and the births of
foals and calves and had watched the horse doctor as he administered
potions or salves to ailing steeds.  As with most country boys I had seen
pigs slaughtered and butchered into joints and he had explained that we
were made inside very much like a hog. "We like them have a heart, lungs
and stomach and they are placed in their bodies much as in ours."  He had
winked as he said, "They are favoured in the size of some vital parts but
you will know that also from seeing Invictus!"  Invictus was my father's
favourite stallion and the stable-boys were always laughing as he displayed
his very lengthy pizzle as he passed water and swung his huge cods when he
was set to a gallop.  "Not many years ago we doctors were not allowed to
dissect human bodies but had to rely on written descriptions which were
often quite wrong.  In fact, my anatomy tutor told us his master had been
taught with bodies stolen from graves or from hanged criminals."

     I had shuddered at that but thought that it would be foolish not to
examine inside people as well as outside even though some of treatments and
the medicines seemed little different from those of our horse-doctor.  As
for the French Pox.....  I still wondered if I might become a physician.  I
knew I was not afraid of the dead.  I had seen three bodies.  Two were of
vagrants found dead in ditches or the fields but the other was of a
labourer who had fallen from a haystack and was impaled on a pitchfork he
had idly left standing upright.  No, I was not afraid of the dead and had
several times stood by my Uncle at the open grave holding his book of
prayers for him as some poor person was lowered into that last
resting-place.  It was truly sad when that person was but a child or infant
and Goodman Eyke had lost three of his young children to the fever just two
years ago.

     I thought it best not to enlighten them yet so I put on a questing
look.  "I am dressed now.  You said we might look around."

     George was ready to leave his study.  "If I am questioned tomorrow I
know enough.  I know I have been put in Old Bartleby's Remove because that
vile creature last term hated me so and marked me as a dunce."

     Theo leaned over George and put his arms round him.  "George, you did
right.  We will see you don't languish in Bartleby's room longer than
possible."  He was looking at me over George's shoulder and mouthed 'No'.
I knew not to enquire.

     Once disentangled Theo explained that on our landing were six rooms so
eighteen fellows could be housed, three by three.  Ours was the end room so
we were favoured with two windows.  Both had only the upper light which
could be opened.  George was eager to explain why.

     "You see, Tom, the hasps on the lower windows have been removed.," he
laughed.  "I will tell you truthfully why.  Before then, boys were wont to
piss out of the window in the night rather than use their pot.  We were
told that one night two of the ushers had visited the inn and were
returning when a shower of golden rain descended and they were mightily
displeased.  After that boy was held and his backside reddened the windows
were locked shut so if in great need you would have to have an
extraordinary length or stand on the table but I do not recommend it."

     "Nor attempt to aim and fire like that fool Crashaw who tried that and
drenched his bed-mate!" added Theo.

     "Come on," said George, "We will visit our closest neighbours and then
I think it will be near time for you to meet Mr Ridley."

     We filed out of the room which George locked and handed me a key.  "Do
not lose that and do not let anyone in the room who you do not trust.  We
each have a key and I suggest you hang it on a bootlace round your neck or
have a watch chain on your waistcoat."

     I thought I would try the first as I had spare laces in my chest.  The
key was not too big and it would be safer.  I placed it carefully for the
moment in my britches pocket and followed as George rapped on the next
door.  I hadn't noticed but ours had a small card with our three names on
it, 'Davies, Lascelles, Browning'.  This one read 'Collett, Gordon, Bayes'.
I deduced the first two were the older boys and the third was their 'fag'.
Someone inside called out 'Come in' in quite a low-toned voice.  George
opened the door and we filed in.  Three boys were at their desk with books
open in front of them.

     One of the boys stood up.  Gosh, he had quite a crop of side-whiskers
and was the owner of the low voice.  "Demmit, they let you back then,
George my friend!"  He held out his hand which George shook vigorously. The
other two stood up. Theo and the other older lad shook hands silently but
with smiles on their faces.  I took it that the young one was Bayes who
shyly put out a hand which I shook.  A scholar's hand as my brothers would
have said, soft, but it was firm.  All three then eyed me as George told
them my name.  "I know you, young sir, Mr Sam Browning's son, eh?" the
whiskered one said.  "I saw you with your father at the Wisbech Horse Fair
at Easter.  My father bought a fine matched pair from him and he is
mightily pleased with them!"  He laughed.  "You remember my brother, Toby.
He courted one of your sisters until your mother decided he was too much of
a liability.  Too right!  Father shipped him off to the China trade where
he's trying to make his fortune.  My fate, too, if I don't do well here and
can't get to Oxford.  Enough about me."  He pointed to the other youth.
Taller, with a pimpled face and a great shock of auburn hair. "Angus Gordon
here from somewhere in North Britain so I'm told...."

     He lurched out of the way as a fist was raised.  "...I'll introduce
myself, Bertie, without your help!" the lad said and a hand was thrust out
in my direction.  I shook it.  Another scholar's hand.  "They'll be all
lies these scoundrels will tell about us but I know them well.  We've been
here as Pups and Whelps together and now we're free of the kennels below.
And we too have, I hope, a faithful fag!"  Angus also had a merry look and
a smile which creased up his freckled face as he spoke.  He had a most
agreeable lilting accent not like the rough and wayward speech of the
Scotch Trooper who came as servant to my brother Torquil some two years
ago.  That Trooper was short in the leg but was an excellent horseman and
had taught Robin and me how to use a lance as we rode which he said in
India was the way they used to hunt pigs.  I must admit our lances were but
sharpened staves and we hunted a bundle of straw tied with twine but it was
good sport.

     I guessed young Bayes to be about my age.  He was quite short coming
barely to my shoulder but he had dark eyes which were fixed on me and I
felt he was clever.  This showed immediately.  He moved in front of Angus.
"Salve multum, mi amice," he said and the shyness went as he grinned at me.
I grinned back. "Salve tantundem mihi, bone vir!" I said and made a mock
bow. ["Many greetings, my friend."  "My greatest greetings, good sir!"]

     George gave a great snort.  "This is too much!  The heathens are
amongst us truly.  All I can hope is that our fag will construe for us as
well as brew a good pot of tea."

     "No worry," said Angus, winking at me, "At least Aubrey did not
discourse in Greek."

     "Kenos phroneseos!" said young Bayes, who I assumed was
Aubrey. ["Stupid boy!": literally, "No sense!"]

     "Me genoito!"  I said and Angus laughed.  ["May it not be so!": or
colloquially "God forbid!"]

     "Thank you!" said Angus to me, "And I will deal with you later, cheeky
brat!"

     So Angus had understood our exchange in Greek.  Both George and Bertie
Collett had not given any indication that they had understood our talk.  Of
course, Theo had.  He looked from Aubrey to me.  "Perbene loqueris," he
said in Latin.  ["You speak very well."]

     "Please!" said George, "You are making my head ache!"

     Young Bayes smiled.  "I try my best."

     George shook his head. "Well do not do your best to make my head
ache."  He turned to the one I knew now to be Bertie Collett.  "This is
your last year here..."  Bertie nodded.

     "I shall be eighteen in five months time and my father says I must
make up my mind what I will do.  He wants me to go to Oxford and does not
want me lazing at home.  I said I would go but did not say I would prefer
to laze there without him finding fault all the time.  I never seem to do
right in his presence."

     George snorted.  "My father is the same but we get by as I do not mind
being set to work."

     "With three older brothers what can I do?  I have no desire for the
law or the church, nor a place in a China counting-house like Toby.  James
is at our embassy in Paris and Percy is set to follow father in the House."

     I knew he meant the Commons where the Members of Parliament sat.  I
remembered his father at the Horse Fair.  A rather rotund, red-faced
elderly man who sported a large crop of side-whiskers which his youngest
son was trying to emulate.  At least Toby had been clean-shaven when I met
him at my Aunt Fanny's house in London where my sister Hatty was at the
time 'learning to be a lady' as Father laughingly said.  I don't think he
approved much of Aunt Fanny's pretensions.  Father's eldest sister was
married to Sir Digby Wright whose only ambition seemed to be to squander
his family fortune on hare-brained speculations, so Father said, having
left the Government Service at quite an early age through being injured.
They had two children now grown, Rosamund and Nicholas.  Aunt Fanny's
greatest delight was to have taken my sisters and female cousins one by one
to introduce them to Society.  Both my sisters had made good marriages
according to my Mother, though Toby had been cast aside as quite
unsuitable, but Hatty had found true happiness with a curate who was now a
minor canon at St Paul's Cathedral.  Their six-year-old twin sons, Peter
and Philemon, delighted in visiting the estate and I had taught them to
ride two of our small ponies at Easter.

     George then withdrew a large turnip watch from his waistcoat pocket.
He scrutinised it carefully.  "If this demned object has not got slower
young Browning has but fifteen minutes to find Mr Ridley.  We will bid you
good day."

     Young Bayes gave me such a smile I sincerely hoped we would become
friends.  George bustled us out.  Once safely in our room he sighed.  "I do
wish Collett did not exercise us each time with his concerns over his
future.  He has talked of nothing else in the dining-room for the past two
years.  His father also keeps him on short commons.  I warn you, do not
lend him any money, young Tom.  In fact, do not lend anyone you do not
trust with money, books or any other possessions.  Is that not so, Theo?"

     Theo nodded.  "Very good advice.  I am still owed five shillings I
foolishly lent my fag-master two years ago.  He is now at Cambridge and
unless I go there and find him I have no hope of regaining my money."

     George laughed.  "And, Tom, you will hear that story many times, too!"
He withdrew the watch again.  "What I did not tell Collett was that this
has not worked as long as I have had it.  It is good for show and has got
me much credit with others when I tell a master or an usher that the time
for the bell ending a lesson is long gone.  Anyway, I will let Theo finish
our translation and I will take you across to Mr Ridley's own house."

     Theo snorted.  "Only because Mrs Ridley adores our flaxen-headed
ploughboy and will give him tea and a slice of cake.  I will sit here alone
and find some lemonade to comfort me."

     George laughed and gave him a rude long nose.  "Come on Browning, as I
must call you in the great man's presence.  Remember you must refer to us
all by our surnames other than when we are together."

     Yes, I had been told that by both Uncle Dodd and Terence.  I knew
father always spoke of Bulstrode, Ewing, Neville or Merton when referring
to owners of neighbouring estates and he was always Browning to them.  One
only used Christian names in family or with very close friends.  I hoped
George and Theo would be close friends.  Of course, servants were often
called by Christian names.  Molly and Maggie were two of our parlour-
maids, but Cook was always Mrs Gray although Father had whispered to me one
day that he had never met Mr Gray! Yes, and Jackson was a footman but the
young grooms like Rowley and Robin were called by their Christian names and
if Rowley was promoted to Head Coachman he would be Mr Roberts like his
father.  He would always be Rowley to me, though, as he had had charge of
me from when I was five or so and he was nine.  Robin and I had many
adventures together with him and both of us had been smacked and tickled
mercilessly when we had misbehaved or been cheeky.  I valued Rowley as a
true friend and would miss him greatly if he volunteered to join Uncle as a
Trooper.

     Still, I had plenty of questions to ask.  I had noted that Theo had
referred to George Lascelles' father as 'Milord Harford'.  Was George's
father a Lord?  I knew Father often went somewhere near Cambridge to see
Lord Hardwicke who had bought many horses and always spoke of him as Yorke.
Anyway, I had yet to meet Mr Ridley.

     George led me out of the big house we were lodged in and took me
across to a seemingly not much smaller house.  We went to a side door and
George pulled on the bell- rope.  A young, very short, lad in white shirt
and plain black trousers opened the door and smiled when he saw George.

     "Why young Barney we have come up in the world, eh?" George said, "And
you have grown over the summer. I hope you have left some of your mother's
fine sweets for us.  But enough.  I have brought Mr Browning on Mr Ridley's
instructions."

     There was shout from within.  "Lascelles, is that you?  Come in and
don't waste time on the doorstep." The lad stepped back and gave me a
cheeky grin.

     "Mr Ridley will see you now, Mr Browning."  He turned to George "I
will escort Mr Browning and I know Mrs Ridley will see you in the parlour."

     George didn't wait but went straight in and disappeared along a
corridor.  I followed Barney after he had closed the door.

     He tapped on an open door.  A man's voice called out 'Come in' and
Barney ushered me in.  "Mr Browning to see you, sir," he said and turned on
his heel and also disappeared leaving me somewhat stranded.  Not to worry.
A very tall, short-bearded man rose from behind a desk.  He was laughing.
"I heard the clod-hopper making his speedy way to tea and cakes." He picked
up a small bell from the desk and as soon as it rang Barney was at the
door.  "The usual, please, Barney.  And tell Cook two of her specials."

     He looked at me.  I had to look up to see his face as he came round
the desk and stood in front of me.  He held out a hand and I shook it.  It
was a very firm handshake.  "So you are Thomas Browning."  He nodded.
"Alfred Dodd described you well and I welcome you to the school."

     I more or less stammered "Thank you, sir" then remembered.  "My Uncle
asked me to pass on his best wishes to you and Mrs Ridley."

     "Thank you, that was kind of him and good of you to remember.  I
expect he has told you we were friends from College days.  I do not see him
as much as I would wish and I have tried many times to get him to leave his
comfortable parish and help me to run this rather unwieldy establishment.
But he tells me you have the makings of a good scholar."

     I would be brave.  "All I know, sir, is due to him.  I have great
respect for my Uncle Dodd and I have tried my best to please him.  I want
to go to Cambridge and probably study to be a physician like his son.  I
hope I will not be a disappointment to him, or my family."

     Mr Ridley raised his eyebrows, great bushy eyebrows and there was a
twinkle in his eye.  "So you have almost decided on your destiny.  If that
is so, we must make it happen.  But first I must see if the scholar is
there before me."

     We were interrupted by a discreet tap on the door.  It was Barney and
a young man in butler's garb bearing trays.  A silver tea-service and a
stand with delectable-looking cakes were placed on a cleared space on the
desk.  They bowed and in silence went out.

     "Let us have some tea while it is still hot," he said and seated
himself behind the desk again.  "Draw up that chair and let me see if you
know how to pour tea first."

     I pulled a chair up but found it easier to stand to deal with the tea.
I didn't know what sort of test this was but I had watched my mother with
her friends many times so knew that with the fine porcelain cups before me
I should put a little milk in first in case the hot tea should crack and
destroy them.  I think I acquitted myself well and held a full cup on its
saucer with none spilled.

     "Thank you," he said, "Drink yours first before I belabour your brain
with questions and before you taste one of Cook's specials as a reward."

     I sipped my tea but he, more robustly, poured some into his saucer and
drank from that.  "Mrs Ridley does not approve of that," he said as he
wiped his moustache with a fine white handkerchief, "but I find it saves
time in the cooling."

     I didn't dare copy him but I must have smiled as he said it as Father
also did the same when Mother was not looking.  I finished drinking and
placed the empty cup and saucer on the silver tray.  As I did so Mr Ridley
passed me a book.  I scanned the title.  It was Virgil, Book Four of the
Aeneid.  I had already studied the first stanzas only a few weeks previous
with Uncle Dodd.  Did Mr Ridley know that?  Uncle Dodd had said he had not
been allowed to read this particular book until he was at College as it
contained descriptions thought not to be suitable for boys.  He said the
same thoughts were still around, but if boys were not to know about women
and love then they may fall into error and be afraid to ask questions.
Yes, Uncle Dodd had answered several questions and his son, Lancelot, had
made it clear that I was no different in what was happening to me in my
body and private actions than any other boy.  Robin was also comforted when
I told him what Lancelot had said as we had practised some things together.
However, I did wonder one thing, but perhaps that was a question for later.

     "Read from here and then tell me your own understanding of the lines."

     I noted there were about six lines underlined with pencil near the
beginning of the Latin text.  Yes, I had seen them before and Uncle Dodd
and I had made some sense from the poetic hexameters.  "Postera Phoebea
lustrabat lampade terras umemtemque Aurora polo dimoverat umbram,..." After
reading the lines aloud I looked straight at Mr Ridley.  "Sir, I have
worked on this with my Uncle...."

     He waved a hand to interrupt me.  "No matter, let me hear what you
have made of it and then we will find an unseen for you."

     I explained that the best way I had found was to try and translate the
images into more understandable English and then, if it was to be put back
into a form of poetry to try to match the images as far as possible.  "So,
I would understand it as saying that the dawn, Aurora, was breaking and
Phoebus, meaning the sun, had scattered the clouds in the sky.  I know it
doesn't mention her by name but Dido, who is very upset, speaks to her
sister who shares her worries..."

     Mr Ridley held up a hand.  "You did well.  Now, have you seen these?"
He held up another slim volume.  The cover had 'Eclogues' printed on it.  I
shook my head.  "This is more difficult but see what you can make of it."

     Again a few lines had pencil marks under.  "Saepibus in nostris parvum
te roscida mala...."  I scanned through this and a bit later read "...alter
ab undecimo tum me iam acceperat annus,....", and the final line, "....ut
vidi, ut perii, ut me malus abstulit error!"

     I realised this was a real test.  I noted two similar words which in
the passage had quite different meanings 'mala' and 'malus'.  I knew
'sepio' was a hedge so guessed it was poetic use and meant 'garden'.  So
'mala' was the plural of 'malus' meaning 'apple'.  I also thought that
'parvam' was someone small but 'roscida' I did not know.  Whoever it was
with their mother.  Yes, gathering apples.  The next was easy, 'undecimo'
was eleven and the rest of the line meant another year was added so this
person was twelve and male. I got the idea that he was now tall enough to
reach the boughs but in that moment 'ut vidi, ut perii' having seen he was
lost, perhaps, in my mind, struck dumb or swept away with...  'me malus'
...feeling 'bad'.  This was the test.  A boy of twelve seeing a young girl
must have fallen in love.  But could I say that?  Be brave.  I did.

     I said there were some words I didn't know but I had seen there was a
play on words.  I suggested that a boy of twelve, just tall enough to reach
the branches, had watched a mother and daughter gathering apples and having
seen the girl had fallen in love with her but felt bad about it.  I
explained I did not know the word 'roscida'.

     Mr Ridley let out a roar of laughter.  "My boy, you have it exactly,
if not poetically!  Yes, the poor young boy is swept away by his new
passion."  I stared. I did not know one could talk freely of such things.
"But, roscida you would find in your dictionary.  You have one?"  I nodded.
"I will tell you that it means 'dewy'.  Imagine the grass is wet in the
early morning so the apples will be covered with dew." I nodded again and
would remember that word.  He then took a sheet of paper and scratched
something on it with a pen.  He passed it over to me.  I saw he had written
a sentence in Greek characters.  'O pais melana kuna echiei'.  I was able
to construe that.

     "'The boy has a black dog'" I said.

     He nodded and scratched something else on the paper.  He held it up.
I read 'gigant'.

     "That is 'giant'" I said.

     "Write down the dual and plural forms."  He handed me the paper and
dipped the pen in the inkwell for me.

     I wracked my brains and knew I had dealt with that word before.  Yes,
the dual must be 'gigante' and the plural 'gigantes'.  I wrote them as
neatly as I could.  That was rather easy and I wondered what might come
next.  No more Greek but an arithmetic book was placed in front of me.  I
managed that sum as it asked how many quarts of milk would fill four five-
gallon churns and I did it without counting on my fingers.  I said
"Eighty".

     There was silence for a moment.  "You have down well, Browning.  I
think I will place you in Mr Martin's set.  You will find your fellows
eager to learn and most are older by perhaps a year but I am sure you will
please him and you will not feel out of place."  I felt rather proud that
he such confidence in me.  I must do well.  "Also," he continued "I have a
group who meet with me here each Friday at four o'clock.  You may join
them.  Most are much older like your room-mate Davis but there are two
others of your age, Bayes and Dennison.  I will expect you then on Friday."
There was no other explanation.  I guessed it was a scholars' group as both
Theo Davis and young Bayes seemed clever to me.  Had I been marked out as
well?  The interview was over but how was I to be dismissed?  But, there
was more to come.  He smiled.  "Now tell me about your brothers who I
remember well.  Even after Torquil's little mishap he has done well I
hear."

     I did not say that it wasn't a little mishap but said Torquil was now
a Captain and had been recommended to be an aide-de-camp to a General if he
reached his Majority.  Terence was a Cornet with his own Troop of Horse
under my Uncle and had recruited four lads from the village to join up and
was in charge of their training.  I said I didn't think the military life
was for me and said again I wondered if I might study to be a physician.

     Mr Ridley listened attentively and I knew it wasn't just a
conversation to put me at my ease.  I think I spoke up well and confidently
in any case.  I also added that my Uncle Dodd had also said he hoped they
might meet up at the next Gaudy in College.

     Mr Ridley laughed at that.  "If our wives allow it," he said.  Uncle
Dodd had explained it was always a most convivial gathering so I guessed
there would be plenty to eat and drink and Uncle Dodd had an etching of fat
dons at High Table on the wall of his study which he had pointed at when he
told me about it.  As I was speaking so the grandfather clock in the corner
of the room struck five.  My, that hour had gone fast.

     "I think it is time for you to go.  School for all who have arrived
begins tomorrow.  I will send instructions to Davis to guide you to Mr
Martin's room.  He does not have his set in the main hall as you will
find."  He smiled again.  "You had better take that last piece of cake to
Davis as recompense as I am sure Lascelles has been fed more than one piece
by my wife."  He passed me the piece of paper we had written on and I
wrapped the slice as best I could.  I stood and thanked him for his time
and patience with me.  I hoped I did not sound too priggish.  As I finished
he picked up a small bell on his desk and rang it.  The door opened and
Barney came in.  Mr Ridley nodded at the silver tray with the empty cups
and cakestand on it which Barney picked up.  He preceded me through the
door then turned and closed it.

     "I am to take you to Mrs Ridley now," he said and gave me a really
cheeky simper.  "There may be another slice of cake if Mr Lascelles hasn't
finished them all."

     I didn't say I had a slice for Theo Davis but followed him along the
corridor to a door covered by a hanging red velvet curtain.  This he slid
across on the rod above and tapped on the door.  The door was opened by a
grinning George Lascelles.  I was ushered in with Barney announcing "Mr
Browning as requested, Ma'am".

     A tall lady was standing by a large birdcage on a stand.  In the cage
on the perch was a magnificent green and gold parrot.  As I came in the
bird cocked his head on one side. "Come in, boy!  Pleased to see you!" it
cackled.  Both George and the lady laughed and Barney gave a little sniff.
He'd heard it many times before I thought.  He turned and went off out.

     "Thomas Browning," the lady said, "Welcome to the school.  I assume my
husband has examined you and found you acceptable."  She laughed and the
bird cackled again.  "Good show!" it said.  "Take no notice of Mr Pitt.  He
comments on everything."  The bird sidled along it's perch. "No notice," it
repeated.  She turned to George.  "George, that last piece you had your eye
on, hand it to Thomas, please."

     George did as he was told.  Anyway, he still had half a slice in his
hand so I wasn't depriving him.  Also he seemed very much at home here.  He
had loosened his jacket which I knew from visiting Aunt Fanny Wright in
London was not done in polite society when ladies were present unless they
were family and even then you would ask permission.  Aunt Fanny was very
strict on rules of society as my sister Peg had crossed swords with her on
a number of occasions.  Sister Peg had a mind of her own as Father said and
God help her poor husband.  I liked my brother-in-law Ranald Foster and at
their wedding three years ago he had passed over five gold sovereigns
saying I had been a good page-boy.  I noted three weeks ago that she was
now in foal, or whatever people in polite society would say, for the second
time.  I knew one word was pregnant but had never heard anyone say it at
home.  Isaac our blacksmith's son said it about girls in the village and
that they needed to be "well-rogered" to catch a child and he was ready
when required.  As his erect pizzle escaped from his small- clothes most
days when bending at the forge I knew him to be well-established for that
task.

     But, here was another slice of very tasty cake.  I thanked Mrs Ridley
and she pointed to a chair.  Before she said anything the parrot rasped out
"Sit down, boy!  Arse first!".  Mrs Ridley just shook her head as George
gave a snort of laughter.

     "I apologise, Thomas," she said, "I am afraid Mr Pitt has picked up
some most inappropriate language.  I blame my husband for leaving boys in
the room with him."

     I thought George looked a bit guilty but I piped up and said my Aunt
Fanny Wright had had a parrot but gave it away when it said things when a
clergyman had visited her which made her blush.  I didn't say that bird had
tried to peck me when I held a piece of bread out for it and said 'Fucking
little tyke' when I snatched it away.  My sister Peg was most amused when I
told her it had sworn at me and said Uncle Digby had bought it from a
sailor so what did I expect.

     Mrs Ridley said she knew my mother and was a cousin to both George's
mother and to the Crossleys.  I knew my mother had been Miss Crossley and
Father had met her up Chester way when he was with Grandfather buying
horses.  Did this mean I was a cousin to George?  But then, my Mother had
explained that even distant kin were called cousin and family relationships
were very important.  Mrs Ridley said I was not to get upset as many of the
younger boys were on leaving home.  I smiled and said I had thought of it
as an adventure.  George snorted again but said nothing.  After finishing
my slice of cake George said we had better go or we would miss supper which
was to be served at six-thirty.  Mrs Ridley rang her bell and Barney
appeared to let us out.  As we went through the side door George gave him a
gentle slap on the back and said he hoped he would do well.  I felt that
George was a good and kind person and I hoped he would guide me through my
first schooldays.

     When we got back to our room with George telling me that I was not to
tell others that he visited Mrs Ridley as they might be jealous.  "She is a
good friend of my Mother," he said, "And I have to tell her what has been
happening at home during each holiday."  He laughed when I said my Mother
had been a Crossley.  "We shall have to sort out if we are related," he
said, "I know my grandfather's brother married a Crossley and there are two
Crossleys who farm near us, but I know no more."

     Theo was sitting at the desk when we got back.  He was busy studying
an atlas and tracing out with his finger across France.  I gave him the
wrapped slice and George said he'd only managed three. I was left out of
the conversation then as George said he had heard there was to be a Hare
and Hounds Chase on Saturday and he was to be a Hare and needed another
speedy boy to help him make the paper trail.

     I was intrigued as I had thought he had meant a proper hunt with dogs
and horses.  I butted in.  "What is this?" I asked.  Both then took in
turns to say two boys set out half an hour before the 'hunt' with satchels
of torn paper which they scattered as they ran and finished by tying three
ribbons to a tree, blue, yellow and red.  The 'hounds' were the boys in
three groups according to their ages and they set off with fifteen minutes
between them and the winner in each group was the one who plucked the
coloured ribbon from the tree.

     I said that sounded good and would I be allowed to run?  I added I had
won two foot races in the Village sports at the Harvest Festival.

     George looked me up and down.  "I vote you are a Hare with me.  I will
tell Mr Pretyman tonight.  He is the Master who organises the race.  Have
you some running drawers?"  I shook my head.  "We will find you some.  You
wear just a light undervest and running drawers.  You will need light boots
as well.  I will arrange it all."

     Theo laughed.  "When our George decides something all will be
arranged."

     So I was to be a Hare.  I hoped I could run as far as they said.  Some
six miles or so.  But it was time for supper.  I followed them down and
joined a rather noisy throng in the room on the ground floor.  Scrubbed
tables and benches were lined up.  Two men I took to be Ushers were herding
a number of small boys round one table.  I noted that at least three were
snivelling.  I supposed they must be new like me.  Older boys were making a
rush for other tables and Theo held me until I was seated between him and
George with the three boys I had met earlier opposite us.  Others slapped
George and Theo on the back as they sat down and I saw that one table had
four men and four much older boys than George and Theo sitting there.

     One of the men stood up and rapped on the table with a small hammer.
There was immediate silence.  "For those returning welcome back to
Ashbourne and for all those who are new, welcome!" he said in a loud voice,
he then clapped once, "Let us eat!"  One of the older boys sitting with him
then stood and intoned 'Benedictus benedicat' and four serving boys came in
carrying trays of platters covered with slices of meat.  These were placed
on the tables and one boy on each table then served out slices onto plates
which were passed round.  The boys then brought out tureens of boiled
potatoes and gave out baskets of bread as well.

     Even though I'd had slices of cake I was hungry and fell to with
enthusiasm when my plate was loaded.  The meat was good and the potatoes
well-cooked and there was a big jug of thick gravy as well which I mopped
up with a hunk of bread.  Other jugs were placed on the table with
earthenware mugs.  This was small beer but wasn't quite as good as the beer
brewed at home.  Still, I was thirsty and had two mugs.  When the meat
course was finished so trays of treacle pudding were brought to each table.
No second plate - a lump of steaming sugary confection was ladled out to
each and lips were smacked at the delightful sweetness.  All the time there
was gossip and quite a bit of noise until the Master rapped the table
again.  Silence and another older boy stood up.  'Benedicto benedicatur'
and that was the end of supper-time.

     I had not only been busy eating but had tried to scan my neighbours
and also the surrounding tables.  I guessed there must be about fifty boys
with about eighteen or twenty of them quite young, no more than ten or
eleven years and the snivelling ones must be quite young, possibly eight or
nine.  They were on two tables close to the Masters.  Four other tables,
including ours, held the rest, some nine or ten on each table.  George and
Theo had talked to most of those on our table who included the three I had
met.  I heard other names - Crawford, Charteris and Buckingham, were three
I think I could remember.  There was much banter and talk of summer days
spent riding or visiting family or friends.  There was talk of journeys on
the railway which I knew was beginning to link some towns and cities.

     I had made my one exciting excursion on a railway train when the
family visited Aunt Wright at New Year.  As a treat we went by carriage to
London Bridge and then went on the new railway train to Greenwich and back.
Mother held my hand tightly both ways and wondered if the engine might fall
off the rail.  Uncle Digby told us several times he had shares in that line
and was investing in the new railway which would pass through a station at
Stamford.  I told my tale and said that was near where I lived though our
village and house was six miles from that town. I hoped they did not think
I was a boaster but Theo said he wouldn't ride that way as some Member of
Parliament had been killed by a train.  Another boy, I think it was
Charteris, said his father had shares in that line and the fool shouldn't
have got in the way as it made the share price drop.  Two other boys
murmured 'Bubble, bubble' and others laughed.  I would have to ask what
they meant.  Anyway, I heard George announce he had volunteered to be a
Hare and that he had a very able running mate.  He was toasted for that and
I was toasted, too, when he pointed at me.  More jugs of small beer came
round and the noise in the room got louder.  In the end two of the young
men on the Master's table stood.  One was the bearded youth who had said
the first Grace.  They had silver-topped canes which they rapped on the
table.

     "Chapel is at half-past eight in the morning," the bearded one
announced.  "Be in your rooms by nine o'clock tonight and all candles to be
out by ten o'clock."

     Theo nudged me as we stood and moved from the table.  "That's
Winstanley and he is head Praepostor for the School." He nodded.  "Very
important.  He has a place at Trinity College at Cambridge next year.  His
father is a canon."

     I was itching to know what a Praepostor was but I dare not ask now.
Anyway the tables were being cleared by the serving lads and I saw George
say something to the lad Japhet who nodded.  Once the tables were cleared
and the younger boys led out by two of the ushers we sat around and games
of chess and draughts were retrieved from cupboards.  I saw one group of
boys with packs of cards but saw they were not 'the Devil's Bible' as Enoch
Barker our blacksmith called them but cards with printed pictures and I
recognised one of their games as Pairs which I played with my Mother with
proper playing cards.

     Theo asked if I played chess.  I did as Uncle Dodd had taught me that
as well.  Theo was very good but I managed to draw the first game but lost
the second.  Two other boys then wanted the board so I said I would go up
and finish unpacking as I still had books and other things to take out of
my chest.  I was also rather tired.

     George was still talking animatedly as Theo and I went off out of the
room.  Two of the older boys were leaning against the outside wall and
smoking clay pipes.  I saw another boy not quite behind a tree having a
piss.  Theo sniffed.  "That's Macauley.  Father's a judge.  Son's seldom
sober and his wits are addled.  Keep well clear my advice."

     I took a quick look at Macauley who had been shaking his pizzle and
was now trying with little success in tucking it back in his trousers.  No
wonder, his trousers were stretched over a large sagging belly and as we
hurried to the door of our stairs there was a loud belch and fart and an
anguished cry of "Oh shit!"

     Theo chuckled.  "Probably has done.  I wonder who his fag is this
year.  Got through three last year as they said he and Probert were too
dirty and idle to deal with."

     "Probert?" I asked.  I had heard that name before.  Sir Daffyd Probert
had bought several horses from Father over the last year or so and I
remembered he had been accompanied by a big lubberly youth who was more
than unkempt.  In fact, although Sir Daffyd had been entertained in the
main parlour the lad had sat outside munching on something Cook had handed
him. "Big, ungainly?" I continued.

     Theo laughed.  "Correct.  Fat, ugly, stupid beyond belief and I am
normally kind to my fellow creatures."  He became serious.  "It is
unfortunate that George will have to tolerate that pair as they are in
Bartleby's Remove as well.  We must do all we can to help him study."  He
shook his head.  "George is the stoutest fellow I know but learning is hard
for him.  You will help?"

     Just in the few hours I had known George I knew him to be of real
English oak as Father said of men he approved of.  I said whatever I could
do Theo could rely on me.

     "Thank you.  Your reward will not only be in Heaven I'm sure.  And
from the way George has dealt with you so far I know he will be a good
friend."

     I picked out some of my books from the chest and arranged them on the
space left on the shelf.  My Latin dictionary and Greek lexicon stood side
by side.  I had three volumes of Latin texts as well as a copy of Uncle
Dodd's Primer.  He had also given me a book on Greek grammar and syntax as
well as one on accidence.  My Bible was next and then two of my favourite
books by Sir Walter Scott, 'Rob Roy' and 'Ivanhoe'.  My Mother had given me
a book of poetry as well as a copy of Shakespeare's 'Hamlet' which I had
not yet read.  I left others in the chest as well as some belonging to
Robin which I must give him.

     Theo smiled when he saw 'Rob Roy'.  "There," he said pointing at his
books, "I have that and 'Marmion' and a book of his poems."

     I grinned.  "'The way was long the wind was cold, the Minstrel was
infirm and old'," I quoted.

     I think he was impressed.  "'The Lay of the Last Minstrel', eh?  I
know it, too."

     We were interrupted by George coming in, a bit red-faced.  "I must not
have so much beer," he complained, "I shall be up pissing all night.  I
will sleep on the edge near the pots."

     "George, don't be so uncouth," said Theo, "I know well that too much
beer does not suit you.  Remember you will running on Saturday so we do not
want you sottish and full of lethergy."

     George was not put out.  He shook his head quite sadly.  "Oh. Theo, I
do not know what I would do without you keeping me on the straight and
narrow."

     Theo laughed.  "There is no need for you to be contrite, just due
moderation."

     George looked at me.  "You must forgive me young Tom if I cause you
any distress.  I am too exuberant at times.  I hope I have not put you in a
difficulty saying you would run with me as a Hare."

     I shook my head.  "I only hope I may come up to your expectations."

     We sat and each learned a little more about who we were and our
interests.  Yes, George was the son of a lord, Viscount Lascelles of
Harford of the County of Westmoreland.  He was the Honourable George
Lascelles but did not hope to succeed as he had two elder brothers who were
both in rude health, as he said.  True, Theo was the son of a Bishop and
he, too, had two elder brothers, one a curate and the other a lawyer.  As I
also had two elder brothers I said we were three thirds, which made one,
and I hoped we would be one in friendship.

     "We will shake on that," said George and we grasped each other's hand,
though he did hiccough and apologised.

     It was getting late and the candles in the two-branched sconce on the
desk had been lit.  It must be getting near ten o'clock and Theo said we
should be getting ready for bed as we all had a busy day tomorrow.  First,
I followed them down the unlit corridor and stairs and out to the open
privy where I thankfully emptied my bladder.  George was employed for some
time as he must have supped a good deal of small beer.  As Theo and I
waited for him Theo pointed to the out-house soil pit where he said I
should make sure I visited early each morning before the stench of fifty
boys rose.  Oh dear, there was a sour smell rising anyway.  He said that a
servant would be putting the lime down soon to sweeten it.

            I was glad to return to our room and I was shown how the
truckle bed was stowed under the bigger canopied bed they would share.  We
undressed and I folded my clothes and put them on shelves and hung my
jacket on a hook on the door of the cupboard.  I drew my nightgown over my
head and with almost a sigh of relief crawled under the covers.  I heard
Theo say "Bless us Lord and bless our families and may we make ourselves
good vessels of learning, Amen".  Both George and I echoed that Amen as the
candles were extinguished.

     I was tired but could not go to sleep immediately as images of the
day's happenings were in my head.  As I thought about all these things I
heard something unmistakable.  It was the breathing of two boys who were
engaged in that solitary sport I had learned so quickly and happily to
enjoy not so many months ago.  I heard the intake of breath of one and then
of the other as they moved towards the release of their vital seed.  I
could wait no longer, my own pizzle was hard and at full length as I thrust
aside the covers and pulled my nightshirt to my chin.  My own efforts did
not take long and with a grateful sigh my own juices spurted free.  I lay
quiet as my hard breathing quietened.  I wondered if my new companions
would be shocked by my youthful audacity.  No, they had been just as bold.

     As I lay still something dropped from above and landed on my chin.  It
was a damp washcloth.  Not damp with water I realised.

     George's voice came quietly.  "Use that, young Tom.  It is deuced
uncomfortable sleeping in a well-starched nightshirt!"

To be continued: