Date: Fri, 24 Feb 2012 16:31:28 +0000
From: Jo Vincent <joad130@hotmail.com>
Subject: Tom Brownings Schooldays

			 Tom Browning's Schooldays

				    By

				   Joel

			    Chapter TwentyNine


We knew we had to be back in good time for luncheon before setting out for
the big parade.  This would be at one o'clock and would be a simple repast
as Rosamund had said a dinner this evening was planned for all the family.
Branscombe smiled when I said he was now considered part of the family.

     Decisions had to be made about our excursion.  Branscombe confessed he
had only been to London once before, so almost everywhere was new to him.
I suggested we might just 'take the air' as it were and get whoever the
driver was to take us hither and thither as long as he knew the way home!

     I knew Jacobson would not be our driver as he was taking the Captain's
coach for repair and leaving the boys to explore the British Museum.  I
thought we might go there but we would not have time to see that and ride
around as well.  Just before ten o'clock we made our way to the mews.
There was the covered chaise all ready with Gregson to drive us and young
Peters, back from the visit to his aunt, as his companion on the box.

     Gregson smiled when I asked for his opinion for the route.  "Leave it
to me, sir, I take her Ladyship to many houses so I am well-acquainted with
the streets and will make a good selection for you.  If it is not too cold
I could tell you about the places we pass through the small window."

     Since driver, postilion and passengers were well-wrapped against the
January weather we decided this would be a good idea.  As it was, with a
covered chaise, the small windows would get quite steamed with our breath.
Outside, there was a haze and the usual stink of smoke and shit.  After we
had set off I told Cedric about the Duchess's request for a small cigar to
counteract the smells.  "She is not my idea of what a Duchess might be
like," Branscombe said with a laugh.  "Our Lady FitzWilliam is the grandest
society lady I have met and I must say she is most affable.  Her background
is most humble but she does not have the airs of some other ladies I have
met in my mother's company."

     I did not enquire further about his views on equality but sensed he
was a keen observer of the quirks and sensibilities of others.

     We set off at a good pace and I observed we took streets which would
lead us to Park Lane alongside Hyde Park.  As before, I could see riders in
the Park and there was a constant flow of horses and carriages along the
Lane.  Branscombe said he was not an experienced horseman but he would
value some instruction and practice.  I said Robin would have his Silver
with him and there were always a spare mount or two in the stable at
Ashbourne. His roommate Maitland had a good seat and we could remedy any
shortcomings in his skills between us.  He laughed and said I had all the
makings of a stern schoolmaster. I shook my head.  My desire was to be a
physician and I would work towards that goal.  He joshed me and said if he
ever commanded a vessel I could be the ship's surgeon as long as I didn't
drink all the rum.  We laughed together remembering that flask of fiery
liquor which he had produced and I had coughed and spluttered.

     Once in Park Lane we bowled along at a reasonable pace and soon
reached Oxford Street with it's rows of shops, inns and houses.  Branscombe
asked if we could stop when he saw a shop with a display of ladies'
haberdashery, scarves and fripperies.  I asked if he wanted a new chemise
for his football playing and got a glare and a decided dig in the arm
muscle this time.  "I have three sisters to keep happy and I think a small
gift from London will delight them. Lizzie and Bella were complaining they
had no time to scour the shops but I have ten minutes rather than the ten
hours they would need to find any objects they might desire."

     He was out of the door and along the pavement in a trice.  I got out,
too, to stretch my legs.  It gave me the occasion to ask Peters about his
visiting.  He said he was so pleased and grateful for that opportunity. He
had such a good time especially with his two male cousins who were a little
older than him.  He had been taken to a Music Hall which had surprised him
with the different entertainments put up on the stage.  Singing, dancing,
play-acting and comical turns, but he would have to be careful what he said
when he got home as his mother might not approve of such places.  He said
both his cousins had good places as junior clerks in counting-houses but he
wouldn't want to live in London.  His reasons were the same as others had
said.  It was dirty, smelly and was not the countryside, with it's clean
air and wide open spaces.

      True to timing Branscombe was back within ten minutes bearing seven
small parcels Seven?  He said he had a lace handkerchief or a silken scarf
in each.  Three sisters, his mother, my mother, my cousin Rosamund and,
surprise, surprise, one for Miss Letitia de Vere!  She would be at the At
Home tomorrow!!

     "I found her most delightful," he said quite openly, "I don't think
she has many friends.  Her mother is an invalid and she has to be with her
much of the time.  Her father is kind as he takes her to as many functions
as possible.  As he is a busy man I think she will be with a chaperone
tomorrow."

     I asked no questions but I sensed dear Cedric was a little smitten,
just like the young men at Careby with Mary Ann Clements.

     We continued our outing and turned left to Cavendish Square then on up
Portland Place to the Crescent below Regent's Park.  As there were few
carriages about, Gregson drove around the Park and commented there was an
enclosure called a Zoological Garden with wild beasts like lions and tigers
in it.  I wanted to stop but again there would not be time.  We drove on
and made a complete circle along roads which took us back to Oxford Street
again.  Even though it was nearing midday there was no sun and a horrid
yellowish fog was all around.  Poor Peters started to cough so when I saw
an apothecary's shop I told Gregson to stop and went in and asked for a
good remedy.  I said my cousin, who was a physician, recommended
ipecacuanha as a constituent for any draught to relieve a cough.  I think
the apothecary was rather amused at my precociousness but he agreed and
said he made a mixture containing that substance with squills added, which
he could advocate as providing a good measure of relief.  As I said I hoped
to study to be a physician, like my cousin, he gave me a paper with the
receipt which he had followed in preparing the concoction.  I paid for a
six-fluid-ounce bottle which he noted should be taken as one teaspoon every
two hours for general relief.  As we didn't have a teaspoon in the coach
Peters had to take a small swig straight from the bottle and that did stop
the hacking.  I think Branscombe was rather impressed with my knowledge as
he had accompanied me into the shop to see I wasn't murdered and taken by
the resurrection men to be cut up in Surgeons' Hall so he said!  I laughed
and said that sounded a bit more than circumcision.  "That first!" he
riposted.

     It was noticeable, as the morning went on, that the number of
conveyances increased greatly with many cabs plying for trade.  We were
going along gently when one uncouth fellow drove his battered hackney
straight across our horses causing Gregson to pull them up suddenly.
Gregson said nothing but the fellow let off a stream of oaths as another
cab-driver beat him to the kerb, where a would-be passenger was waving his
walking-stick to attract attention.  Branscombe was jolted and two of his
packages fell to the floor.  He was more than annoyed.  As we drew
alongside the offender he drew the window down and let fly his own torrent
of oaths.  I heard among other things that the oaf was a 'fucking half-wit'
whose 'brains were in his ballocks', that his mother owned 'a pushing
school' where his sister got 'tuppence as socket money', and no doubt that
was where the cabbie's 'prick had caught a burner'.  Hearing such a tirade
from a seemingly respectable young man the driver of the offending vehicle
whipped up his horse and took off at such a rate he managed to almost lock
wheels with a couple of quite innocent cabs.  Gregson must have heard the
rumpus and, wisely, drove on even more carefully.  Branscombe was quite
red-faced after that.

     "That shit-filled loon!  He might have turned us over," he said still
rather heated.  There was a moment or two of silence between us as I was a
little bemused about some of the phrases he had used.  "Tom, I must
apologise.  My temper gets the better of me at times."

     I was more than amused.  I had heard our grooms and labourers swear
when things went awry and they were not aware the Master's young son was
tucked behind a tree or haystack.  I knew a fair number of words I should
not use in polite company but Branscombe's outburst had taught me a few
more.  I knew 'whoreson' and 'arse' but had not heard 'arse-worm' before,
but thought of Lancelot's cure of young Eamonn's itchy hole.  The meanings
of most of the phrases he had used passed me by though I could guess at
some.  I hoped I could ask him more.  At the moment it was not possible as
another commotion was beginning.  Gregson reined the horses to a halt as
two uniformed Peelers grabbed a young unkempt fellow.  A lady had started
screaming and her gentleman companion was hopping on one foot and shouting.
Gregson turned on the box and informed us that the thief had grabbed the
lady's reticule and had kicked the man in the shins to distract him but the
fellow must have been watched by the constables.  "Too many of these
cut-purses around," he said, "That's why it's not safe for ladies or
gentlemen to carry things which can be easily grabbed."  I heard Peters
shout from his position on the step at the rear, "There's another!"
Looking out we saw another youngster, no older than me, dash from a shop
doorway pursued by three shop-lads one of whom was waving a broom.  We
didn't see if he was caught as Gregson sensibly drove on.

     We were certainly seeing London at it's best and worst!  I think we
were both now looking out to see if there were more miscreants!  But there
were no more excitements as we turned into North Audley Street and made a
circuit of Grosvenor Square marvelling at the size and opulence of the
houses.  Branscombe puffed his cheeks.  "One can only wonder who owns all
these and what station in society they hold.  My father says he could never
afford a place here although he spends enough making our house even bigger.
He's going to have to spend more when I tell him about your father's plans
for a jakes in every bedroom."

     "I should see some work has been done while we have been away," I
said, "Steven Goodhew said he would have the grounds surveyed for the
piping and trenches dug if the ground has not been too frozen."

     "Steven Goodhew?" he asked, "Is that..."  He paused.

     "It is the man who has truly been a good father to Robin," I said.
"He is the most upright and kind person one could wish to meet.  He is a
master stonemason and I have spent many hours watching as he dresses and
carves stone with complete artistry.  He is a craftsman much in demand for
the good work he does."

     "And didn't Robin wish to follow in that trade?"

     All things were now being made clear with what had been said and done
over the past few weeks.  "I think there has always been plans for Robin
and his future," I said, "He and I have been almost raised together.  We
have been tutored side by side by my uncle the rector.  He has never
treated us differently from each other.  Robin has a keen interest in
mathematics and I am better somewhat at Latin and Greek.  But he is no
slouch at any sort of study."

     Branscombe was nodding.  "What I have seen and heard of him I think he
will make an admirable companion for Maitland and me."  He laughed.  "Even
before that pretense you and he played Maitland had said how alike you two
were and he was always full of praise for that young groom who cared so
well for Perseus."

     I thought of Maitland.  He was also a true countryman like me and
Robin.  I thought they would get on well together.

     We were almost back to Charles Street and I had much to ask Branscombe
but as soon as we arrived and had stepped out another coach drew up.  There
were cries of "Uncle Tom! Uncle Tom!" as two small boys were out of the
door as the coachman opened it.  Paul and Philemon were in full voice.

     Young Philemon stood in front of me.  "We're going to see all the
horses.  Mama says we have to behave like gentlemen, though.  Father said
that might be difficult and I did not know what he meant."

     "It means you have to stand up straight and not chatter too much," I
said.

     Paul looked up at me.  "You sound like Mama."

     Branscombe was laughing.  "Am I to be introduced?"
     They both solemnly shook hands with him as I introduced them.  My
sister hadn't emerged from the coach and sat there smiling and shaking her
head.

     "A hand, please, Tom.  I slipped on ice yesterday and have a sore
ankle."

     Both Branscombe and I stepped forward and assisted her down.

     I leant forward and kissed her cheek.  My, I was now as tall as she
was.  "Not too much damage?" I asked as she carefully walked to the open
front door by my side.  "I have some good liniment in my apothecary's box."

     "Good liniment?  Made for father's horses no doubt.  No thanks!"  As
she reached the bottom step she turned to Branscombe.  "I am sorry I
haven't greeted you, Cedric, but I was more concerned with my injury and my
dear brother's no doubt well-meant offer."

     Cedric bowed his head.  "Ma'am I am most delighted to make your
acquaintance again.  I can assure you that the liniment is good as he has
applied it to several of our fellows who have suffered hurts at football."

     Hatty sniffed.  "Football indeed!  I went head over heels and twisted
my ankle on ice.  I have seen football with those boys in the choir.  I
suppose it is good for boys."

     "Can we play?" Paul asked.

     Hatty wagged a finger at him.  "When you two are bigger."

     He looked rather downcast.  "Mama, you always say that.  When we are
bigger."

     "When will that be?" Philemon asked.

     Branscombe leapt to their defence.  "You'll be big enough, soon, I
warrant.  There is nothing like a good game of football to make good
friends of your fellows."  I think the twins were good friends with
Branscombe now!

     Before our chaise clattered off to the stables I thanked Gregson for
the excursion and gave Peters the bottle of mixture for his cough.  He
thanked me, too, and I said he was to be careful to keep to the
instructions.

     As usual there was a row of footmen ready to assist as we ascended the
six steps to the front door.  Mr Pemberton stepped forward and took Hatty's
cloak and passed the boys' coats and hats on to Mr Partridge.  My aunt's
maid was also waiting and guided Hatty and the boys off to meet Aunt
Fanny. Our cloaks were also removed and handed on.  Mr Purrett said we
would find a hot posset in the breakfast room and that luncheon would be
served promptly at one o'clock while carriages would be ready at ten
minutes to two.  I knew I could eat fast.

     Paolo had some steaming tasty brew which he said was made of herbs
from Italy.  It certainly warmed us before we went up to my bedroom.
Cedric was ready for the jakes he said and beat me to the door.  I was
almost hopping up and down with a full bladder before he had finished and
let me enter as he emerged.  I left the closet door open and pissed as
loudly as I could and heard him laugh.  "Our little stallion, eh?"

     He kept getting the better of me with digs and gibes.  I enjoyed them,
though, as he treated me quite as an equal and not as a younger boy.  He
must soon be seventeen, I thought, if he had that ring in his cods when he
was sixteen.  Could I ask to see it?  No.  It must be quite a secret as
George hadn't ribbed him about it and he would have done if he had known.
I thought that I had been told as Robin would no doubt see it when in the
confines of their room.  But what of others?  Branscombe played football
and got as muddy as others like George.  Did he bath alone?  Perhaps the
ring was small and not too visible.  I did not know and I wished to know!

     "Tell me about that ring.  Is it very big?"  My question was blurted
out.

     He curled his lip at me and laughed.  "You have waited long enough,
young Tom, to ask that.  Watch!"

     His trousers were swiftly unbuttoned.  The leg of his underdrawers was
raised and a large, low-hanging ballsack was revealed.  There was the ring.
About the size of a ha'penny piece and shining silver.  I could see it was
not quite closed, but the tiny gap would not have allowed the skin to have
passed freely through it so how had it been fitted?

     He was one step ahead of my questioning. "It was more open than this
when Jake pierced me and slid the ring through," he said pointing to the
gap, "But pincers were used to make the ends touch once I was used to it
being there.  See, it moves easily."  He rotated the ring and it slipped
through his skin readily.

     "Did it bleed?"  I asked, now wanting both to know how the piercing
was done and to turn the ring myself but daring not to ask such things.

     "A little, but Jake chose a place with no visible vessel.  He said I
was lucky as I had good loose skin, too.  He told of others whose sacks
were close up and more difficult."  He smiled and must have gauged my
desires. "Jake heated a cobbler's brad-awl in a candle flame and then when
it cooled somewhat Reuben held me tight while Jake made the small hole.
The ring was on in a trice and I just felt a little pain."  He held the
ring steady. "Here, you may touch it.  I beg you not to pull on it but move
it gently.  Maitland with his great hands is very gentle and I might
persuade him to visit and let Jake pierce him, too."  He laughed.  "Travis
would do well to have one the size that I have seen through the nose of a
bull.  It would suit him as there is no fellow with bigger cods than him
that I have seen."

     Very tentatively I reached and held my finger and thumb the distance
apart and with great care held and turned the ring.  It did not snag but
passed quite freely.  I let go and smiled at him.

     "Thank you," I said, "You have satisfied my curiosity but I think you
could have had one as you said for Maitland.  It would be like our
neighbour's prize bull has in his snout as well."  I made a ring then with
my finger and thumb well apart.  "And perhaps hang a church bell from
that!"

     He snorted.  "I show you and you make mock!"  He was laughing, though,
and buttoned himself after that fine demonstration.

     "I am not mocking but I ask you not to persuade Robin he should have
the same.  Knowing him he would outdo those Arabs and want a round dozen
and all the bells as well."

     "At least we would not lose him on a dark night," he said, "We would
hear him in the distance."

     "And then keep us all awake when he turns over in bed," I added.

     "And you?" he asked, "You have no desire to have one fitted?"

     I shook my head.  "I expect I might be required to lance or put broken
bones together but I have no desire to allow myself to be cut or pierced."

     He nodded.  "Yes, I suppose if that is to be your profession you will
need to have such skills.  But, Tom, I would ask you not to tell all and
sundry what I have shown you."

     "You have told me because of Robin?"

     "Yes, that is so.  At present only Travis and you know of my adornment
and I wish it to be between us unless some occasion befalls where I am
undone as it were!"

     We turned to less interesting matters.  He looked through the piles of
books I had acquired on this visit.  "I suppose I must read those your
uncle has kindly given me.  The one on ships will be my first and at least
my father will see me with my nose in a book for once."

     Time soon passed as we chatted on.  I found he had been pierced during
the time his parents were away visiting relatives.  He laughed when he said
that he walked almost bow- legged for a few days and had to make sure he
kept a bandage round his ballocks to stop being rubbed by his undergarment.
Luckily all had healed by the time his parents returned and they were not
told.  I thought him both brave but also foolhardy as he might have caused
pus and rot to occur as Lancelot said that was often a result of a cut or
injury.  I did not tell him this!

     He then questioned me about my knowledge of the mixture I had bought
in the apothecary's.  I said the main ingredient to ease the cough would be
the ipecacuanha, but the squills would help to loosen any phlegm or
tightness.  I then had to explain that both were extracted from plants.
The first from a plant of the Americas as far as I knew and squills was
prepared from something like a small onion which I had seen dried and kept
in a jar in my cousin's cellar room.

     "I see if I need a cure I should consult you," he said.

     I shook my head.  "Only for simple things.  I have only the knowledge
from the instruction of my cousin."

     "But you would seem to know as much as that old quack my father has
when he coughs and splutters.  All he suggests is to let blood which my
father refuses as that was the death of my grandfather so he says.  Father
says they could not stop the bleeding and the old man collapsed and died
soon after."

     I said my cousin did use leeches but at least they only removed a
small measure of blood.  I told him of the boy with the injured hand and
how Lancelot used hot salt water to cleanse the wound and that the
cleansing power of salt water was something he had learned sailors swore
by.

     Branscombe smiled.  "I will have to ask Jake if he has heard of that
but I would not have liked to dip my ballocks in a pot of hot salt water."

     After laughing at that we were ready and waiting when the luncheon
gong was sounded.  We were polite and waited until my aunt followed by my
mother and sister with the boys had entered the small dining-room.  My
uncle was wheeled in, then my father appeared full of good spirits.  He
praised the way he had been massaged by Mehmet saying it was an art I could
learn to keep him spry into his old age.  Uncle Digby said he should employ
a good valet who could ease his aches and pains rather than burden me with
yet another task.

     "That boy has yet to earn his keep," my father said, "That school, his
clothes, his food and drink will keep me poor for years to come and that
doesn't include lazing his way through more years of idleness at Cambridge,
no doubt."

     I kept my mouth shut and I felt Branscombe stiffen behind me.  Paul
and Philemon had stopped their chatter, too.

     "Sam, you are an old rogue," my uncle said with a laugh, "Give Tom his
due.  He has solved a problem for me.  He will be an asset to this
household again by his playing tomorrow.  You're an old rogue and a
crosspatch!"

     My father snorted.  "I cannot say the boy is a genius, can I, Digby?"
He thrust out a hand as he advanced to where I and Branscombe were
standing.  He gripped Branscombe's left arm and grabbed at his right hand.
"Here, my boy, do not let my harsh words dispirit you!  Shake my hand!"

     Father was acting the fool!  Poor Branscombe did not know how to
answer straightaway.

     I stepped to his side.  "Father, that lens you use is not enough for
your poor eyesight.  I have not grown five inches overnight," I said, "To
help your privation I may spend money on good spectacles for you so you do
not mistake a lamppost or another for me."

     He clapped Branscombe on the shoulder.  "Listen to that little rogue,"
he said, "He cozens me out of fifty guineas and now he answers me back."
He laughed.  "But I miss him when he is away."

     Branscombe had collected himself.  "Sir, I have also noted his ready
tongue," he said, "But I would say there is no harm in that.  I have
enjoyed his company just these few days and I know he has already put some
of his money to good use."  He laughed.  "I think I will get used to him as
a brother-in-law."

     Father laughed, too.  "Good!  I have to say these things to make sure
his hat still fits."  He turned to the silent twins.  "And I have stopped
your chatter, eh?"

     "Grandpapa," Paul said with a very solemn face, "We thought you were
chiding Uncle Tom.  Are you being unkind to him?"

     My father bent down to their level.  "No, I wasn't.  I was pulling his
leg," he explained, "I was teasing him. He knows me better I think."

     "That's funny," Philemon butted in, "Daddy says things and teases us
and he says the same.  He says he is just pulling our legs.  It's difficult
to understand because he doesn't really pull them."

     My sister Hatty laughed.  "I have to keep explaining all sorts of
things they hear or read."

     I knew exactly what she meant.  I had phrases to ask Branscombe about
like 'dance the Newgate hornpipe' or 'drunk as a brewer's fart' which he
had used when castigating that cab-driver.  At least I could guess at the
first and the second wasn't difficult.  Some of the others he used I needed
help on!

     Still, we had to eat.  We were quite a happy gathering as we arranged
ourselves around the table.  The footmen served us first from platters of
cut hot meats and there was a dish of sliced potatoes cooked in cream and
butter as well.  I sat with Paul and Philemon on either side of me and
Branscombe was next to Paul.  I think they felt very grown-up being in
older company.  There was little chatter but Paul was most excited about
seeing his uncles and all the mounted soldiers.

     "I think I would like to be a soldier," he said, "I could have a horse
then."

     "What about being a sailor?" Branscombe asked him, "You might have a
ship then."

     "No, I wouldn't like that.  I think you have to get wet and I don't
like being put in the bath.  Especially with him!" he pointed at his
brother, "He splashes me and when I can't see he pulls my..."  He stopped
and went bright red.  No one said anything though I nearly guffawed and I
saw my father sitting opposite take a deep breath.  I thought that small
boys in baths and larger boys in the river are just the same!

     There was a moment's silence and my mother, bless her heart, changed
the subject.  "Digby," she said addressing her brother-in-law from almost
the other end of the table, "Do you still correspond with Captain Frampton?
I wondered recently if he still...."  The embarrassment was over.  As I
forked in another mouthful I looked sideways at Branscombe.  He was trying
not to laugh as well.  Something to discuss later!

     There was just time for us all to find room for a delicious
fruit-filled pie and a helping of something my aunt called a trifle.  Sweet
slices of sponge cake in a fruit jelly covered with a thick layer of
custard made from beaten eggs, milk and sugar.  It was superb.

     We then had to hurry as time was passing.  Arrayed in our cloaks, hats
and gloves we went down the steps to the roadway where three conveyances
were waiting.  Not only that but two troopers in full uniform with red
cloaks and plumed helmets were on fine horses and were ready to lead us.
As a special treat we four boys, my sister and mother were ushered into
Uncle Digby's best coach with four of the greys harnessed.  Our own coach
came next and my mother and father with my aunt and Rosamund entered that.
The covered chaise was for the ladies' maids; the two Italians and one
French.  I saw that Rowley was driving our coach with my missing valet,
Jabez, as his companion on the box.  A smiling Natty was next to Peters who
was driving the chaise.  We had a full complement of Mr Churcher with the
reins and Jacobson next to him with Gregson and William on the steps
behind.  With a crack of Mr Churcher's whip we were off.

     The twins couldn't keep their eyes off the two mounted soldiers.  I
whispered we would be seeing many more and they should look and wave to the
people as we passed.  There were few around as we processed from Charles
Street into Berkeley Street.  Of course there were many more as we turned
into Piccadilly and then, horror upon horrors, we turned to go down St
James's Street to reach Pall Mall and then the Mall.  I shut my eyes as we
passed the house where Black Jack was incarcerated.  Branscombe did not
know of this so was pointing out other things to the twins.  I felt better
as we turned into the tree-lined road at one end of which was Buckingham
House and at the other the Horse Guards Parade where we were headed.

     What a sight as we approached.  Two detachments of mounted troopers
rode out and escorted us onto the parade ground where there was a raised
closed stand with seats for viewing the proceedings.  As we drew up there
were shouted orders from mounted officers with drawn swords held upright in
front of them.  We could hear a band of fifes and drums in the distance
which grew louder as the carriage doors were opened and we descended.  Two
unmounted troopers led us to the seats.  I recognised one.  It was a
sergeant in flowing cloak carrying a silver-headed cane.  I could hardly
greet him but I would be able to tell his brothers when I returned to
Careby.  It was Amos Barker the brother of my friends Isaac and Jacob at
the forge.  I wondered if I might also see Abel the other brother.

     Sergeant Amos Barker bowed his head when he saw my father and mother
and I heard my father say a quiet word of greeting to the young man who had
once been his apprentice clerk.  I got a smile as he ushered me to my seat
but all was done in silence except for the roars of the officers directing
their troopers, the clatter of the horses' hooves on the sand-strewn ground
and the band merrily playing away.

     A very fine figure rode up to the stand on a huge and quite
magnificent black stallion.  It was Uncle Billy.  He must have had his full
uniform on but it was covered by the large flowing cloak which all the men
on parade were wearing as there was a bitter wind.  It was a good thing
there were braziers to keep us warm in the stand.  He raised his drawn
sword in greeting and the twins were even more excited.  Paul couldn't help
it.  He called out 'Uncle Billy, it's me!" and waved frantically.  Beside
Uncle Billy was his aide, my brother Torquil, who could hardly keep the
smile off his face.  It was Philemon's turn.  "Uncle Torquil, I'm here!"  A
wave from him, too.  Luckily there were more shouted orders from the
officers and Uncle Billy turned his mount as the first detachment rode up
to prepare for the inspection.  Before any more orders were given a very
splendid coach, with what could only be a Royal coat of arms on the doors
was driven up, and stopped beside Uncle Billy who turned and saluted with
his drawn sword.  Whoever was in the coach must out-rank him, I thought and
wondered who it could be.

     There was no time for questions as gradually more rows and rows of
mounted troopers assembled and then the parade began.  Each detachment wove
in and out as they went through intricate manoeuvres all executed precisely
and, to us observers, without fault.  At one point a dozen troopers passed
us with four bearded riders leading them, each with a large hammer held and
resting on their left shoulder.  They were wearing thick leather coats and
aprons and I knew they were the regimental farriers.  One was Abel Barker
but, as I had never seen him with a beard, I didn't recognise him.  I then
knew which one he was as a leading farrier close on our side reached the
middle of our stand and moved his hammer from his shoulder until it was
upright like the officers with their swords.  I would have plenty to tell
the brothers especially about the thick black beard their twenty-one year
old brother now flaunted!

     As each file of troopers passed my uncle and the coach the officers
raised their swords and the troopers smartly turned their heads on the
order 'Eyes right!'.  It was all in all a magnificent display as it wasn't
only Uncle Billy's regiment on parade but also another cavalry regiment
wearing blue cloaks

     It seemed all too soon the parade was ending.  The ornate coach was
driven off and Uncle Billy turned to us and saluted us all again.  We must
have been watching the cavalcade for almost an hour but the time had
flashed by.  By half-past three the usual yellowish London fog was
descending and it was darkening.  Our own carriages re-appeared. We re-
entered them and were driven round the edge of St James's Park through
Storey's Gate to the barracks.  On alighting we were escorted to the
Officers' Mess to be feted with hot cordials and an array of pastries and
cakes.  My brother Terence soon entered with a whole covey of officers now
without their heavy coats and all 'hung like lampshades'.  There was a
sudden hush as two very stately figures appeared with their staffs and
trumpeters played a fanfare from somewhere above.  One was Uncle Billy in a
very elaborate uniform accompanied by Torquil as his aide.  Something new
about Uncle's rig was a red water-silk sash from right shoulder to left
hip, and a silver star on his breast.  The other officer who preceded him
was even more senior in an even more decorated uniform and coloured sash. A
voice rang out "Pray silence for His Royal Highness Field-Marshal the Duke
of Cambridge." We all stared.  Then the voice shouted "Pray silence for Her
Majesty's faithful servant Major-General Sir William Browning."

     I think all our party froze.  A Royal Duke!  And then this
announcement.  My Uncle Billy had received a knighthood!

     Both came over to us.  All the ladies curtsied as the Duke approached
with his equerry beside him and all us men and boys bowed our heads.  He
was smiling and greeted us most affably and clasped my father's hand after
acknowledging the ladies and the rest.

     "Mein goot fellow! No doubt you are surprised," he said with a marked
foreign accent and beckoned to my uncle.  "Your brother vas vith Her
Majesty ziz morning and I vas pleased she used mein sword to dub our new
Knight of the Bath. The parade this afternoon vas in his honour and you did
not know!"

     "Your Highness," my father said, "I am both surprised and astonished
but then he is my brother for whom no honour would be too great."

     The Duke laughed.  "I told Her Majesty so, too."

     He turned to my mother and aunt. They were introduced by Uncle Billy
who stepped forward beside the Duke.  He went down the line as all curtsied
or bowed again.  I and Branscombe received glances under lowered brows then
he looked down and smiled at the twins.

     This was a signal to young Paul.  He looked up at what could be a
rather stern figure.  "Please sir, I would like to be a soldier when I am
grown."  The Duke cocked his head as perhaps he was a little deaf.  "Do you
live in the Queen's Palace?" the little lad asked, "That is a big house."

     The Field Marshal, the victor and loser of great battles, was,
perhaps, not used to small boys' questions so openly asked but he was a
real gentleman.  "I vish you to be a soldier, my friend," - he pronounced
it like 'freund' which I found out later was the German word - "and I do
not live at the Palace.  Mein house is in Piccadilly. It is not as big as
the Palace."  He smiled again and his bushy eyebrows twitched.  Young Paul
bowed his head again.  Philemon, for once, was silent.

     He moved away and spoke to his equerry as he made his way towards the
assembled officers who were also to be greeted by him.  Uncle Billy was
left with us and his face was wreathed in a great smile.  Father stepped
forward and clapped him on the back.  "Well, little brother, you have
outdone me as I knew you always would.  The great pity is our father could
not have lived to share this triumph but you have most decidedly deserved
it."

     My mother and aunt both kissed him and he kissed his niece Rosamund.
There was general laughter when Philemon wanted a kiss, too.  Torquil
lifted him and my other brother, Terence, who had left his fellow officers,
hoisted young Paul.  This left Branscombe and me.  We were both shaken by
the hand and both murmured our congratulations.  I thought this was
something more for Branscombe to convey to his mother.  A meeting with a
Royal Duke and a newly knighted Major-General.  But then, his mother had
danced with Uncle Billy!

     There was an air of general excitement as our party returned to
Charles Street.  Somehow the news had spread, I assumed from Jabez, Gregson
and the others, and there was a row of smiling footmen to greet us.  Of
course, Uncle Billy was still at the barracks as there was to be a
celebratory dinner there so Torquil and Terence were absent, too.  No
matter, dinner that evening was superb.  As usual Signor Bartoli had
conjured up the most delicious dishes which followed one after the other
until the table was laden.  There was champagne to start and wine followed
wine.  The old Naval captain came along and was disappointed Uncle Billy
wasn't there but was persuaded to stay nonetheless.  He and Branscombe were
soon deep in conversation.  My brother-in-law appeared, too, and the boys
vied with each other to inform their father about everything seen and heard
including that the 'Dook' from Paul and the 'Duck' from Philemon, lived in
a house not as big as the Palace and Uncle Billy had been given a bath by
the Queen. My sister would have a task to enlighten them on that last
matter!  Later two very tired boys were taken off, young bellies full, and
slept on the couch in the parlour while the grown-ups, who included
Branscombe and me, carried on with chat and the ladies did not retire but
sat on.

     Before dinner when I was in my bedroom Jabez was in a rather quiet
state to begin with though he was full of praise for my Uncle Billy's
knighthood.  I tried to question him but he would not be drawn but promised
to tell me more before I left London for Careby on Friday.  "I have been on
an errand," was all he would say.  As he hadn't said it was anything to do
with Black Jack I assumed it was something else.  Like us he was full of
admiration for the great parade and the honour bestowed on my Uncle.  His
face relaxed somewhat when I told him about my seeming spat with my father
and the way he had alarmed Branscombe.  "He has a merry wit," Jabez said,
"Mehmet tells me he was laughing all the time he was being massaged.  He
certainly enjoyed that and said it had eased all sorts of aches.  Mehmet
was rewarded handsomely.  A whole half-guinea.  Your father is so
generous."  He laughed.  "It must run in the family.  Perhaps you country
bumpkins don't know the true value of money."

     "Remind me not to part with any of my hard-earned coins to unworthy
vassals in the future," I said with as much of a sneer as I could muster.
As usual I couldn't maintain it but I did manage to say, "Perhaps he will
receive due recompense for the massage I shall receive in the morning.  I
think Master Branscombe will be generous as well as he is as much a bumpkin
as I am."

     Jabez dropped to his knees and held out his hands imploringly.
"Please, my Master, be kind to your poor slave."  He wrinkled his nose.
"It's no good begging as your britches have the longest pockets and
probably holes at the end."  His nose twitched.  "And we know what they are
for!"  The naughty boy then made very rude movements of his right hand and
fist.

     "And where did I learn that?" I asked being more than amused as I had
seen that last play-acting before and had practised those movements myself
many times.

     "Your humble servant, no doubt," the imp replied.

     We had a good laugh as he raised himself and dusted his knees.

     I said I would miss him once I returned to Careby and then to
Ashbourne but I hoped he would not get involved in anything where he might
be harmed.

     He smiled.  "I think your uncle has my best interests in mind whatever
tasks I am set."

     I was thinking of that when Jabez came with me to my bedroom after
dinner but I had no chance to discuss such things.  Branscombe had gone
along the corridor with Karem and had said he was tired after such a busy
and interesting day.  I thought he was also a little bemused by wine as he
had downed a full glass of champagne and at least four glasses of other
wine with the courses at dinner.  I had to admit I was just one glass
behind him but I had only half glasses.  Little prig, I thought.

     Anyway, I was ready for my bed and again Jabez said he would not stay.
I was too tired to demur and try to chat about his business with Uncle
Digby so sleepily went to bed and slumbered soundly to be woken by a gentle
zephyr blowing across my cheek.

     "It's morning, my little Knight," a quiet voice whispered in my ear,
"thy bath will be ready soon."  I woke with a start.  I had been dreaming
of being with Robin but that went as my eyes opened.

     My only response was a screwed up face and a growl.  That was met with
a laugh.

     "I thought you would never wake."  Jabez must have risen some time
before as he was dressed already in a good shirt and his livery britches.
"It is past seven thirty and your snores have kept the servants awake most
of the night!"

     I was fully awake now.  I leapt out of bed and caught Jabez around his
arms and chest and had him over the edge of the bed.  He was laughing so
much he was helpless.  I let go one arm and thrust my hand down into the
pocket of his britches.  Luckily for me he was wearing a loose undergarment
and his soft cock was lying to that side.  I gripped it through the pocket
lining.

     "What's this you've secreted here?" I said.  "I think you've stolen
one of those little sausages the Signor serves.  Those thin ones which are
short and spicy."

     In truth what I had hold of was akin to something I had heard
described as salami, a thick, long sausage which was served in good
generous slices.  As usual this salami thickened and hardened but I let it
go as dear Jabez would have added a cream sauce very quickly to the
delicacy!

     Whatever I had dreamed about had thickened and hardened my own
youthful sausage and I hadn't released my seed the night before so I was
ready.  I did not have to wait for as I let go of the prize so Jabez with a
mighty wriggle had me on my back displaying my own hardness.

     "I thought so," he said, "Little boys have little toys so let us see
what tune this scrawny flute might play."

     He ran practised fingers up and down pulling back my skin and tickling
that so sensitive end.  My length was ringed and within a minute I was
primed to fire a volley.  My body stiffened and my clean nightshirt caught
a shower which I knew was more than usual.  Even dear Jabez was startled at
the amount.

     With a throaty giggle I got a great compliment.  "My little Master is
growing up fast.  Even my good stallion Mehmet would strain to provide such
a show."

     I was pleased but could not show it openly.  "Even more than you on
your third offering of the night?" I asked.

     "Perhaps on my fifth," the rogue replied.

     He let me go and rushed off and returned with a washcloth.  "We had
better clean you as I think your school-fellow has plans to visit and time
is passing."

     He reached out and pulled the bell-rope.  "To the jakes and the boys
will be here with hot water."

     My moment of triumph had passed.  After any release I liked to savour
those feelings which gradually waned but this was not to be so this
morning.  A very busy day ahead.

     As usual the boys were ready with pitchers of hot water.  I bathed and
was clean and sweet-smelling and was almost dressed when a knock on the
door announced that Branscombe was already up, dressed and ready to pass
the time of day.

     As soon as Jabez finished helping me on with my jacket he said he
would have to be off downstairs as his duties this morning included being
with Paolo in the breakfast room and we should not delay too long.  I
tarried and looked in the glass to see that my hair was tidied enough and
listened to Cedric who was full of praise for the dinner the night before.
He said he had slept well and felt most refreshed this morning.  Even after
partaking of all that wine, I thought and then decided we should move
ourselves.  He wanted to know if anything was planned for the morning as we
left my room and descended the stairs.  I said I had a mind to visit the
optical shop so had to explain about the usefulness of such things as
microscopes.  I didn't say I could use the apparatus to peer at any of his
outpourings to see if there were anchors embedded in the juice, but
explained that it could make things invisible to the naked eye visible.  I
don't know if he was very keen but he agreed another ride out looking at
things would be good.  Yes, I thought, and if the occasion arose I could
find out what a 'pushing school' was and what was 'socket money'.


To be continued:

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