Date: Fri, 24 Aug 2012 11:27:54 +0000
From: Jo Vincent <joad130@hotmail.com>
Subject: Tom Browning's Schooldays  Chapter 42

			 Tom Browning's Schooldays

				    By

				   Joel

			     Chapter Forty Two



We could not hurry the coach as the road in places was bad and very rutted
and still icy where the trees allowed no sun to reach.  After about two
hours we stopped at a reasonable inn.  We had hot cordial and warmed our
frozen hands before the fire.  Rowley said we should not tarry too long as
we would have some food in an hour or so; we must press on to get well past
Melton Mowbray before it got dark.  We achieved our goal but Freddy was
most disconcerted as all this riding had made his poor arse so sore.  He
had never ridden so far in one go.  There was much merriment in the bedroom
we three would share that night as I anointed the redness with some of
Lancelot's best liniment which I had in a small bottle in my saddle-bag.
During our evening meal he did squirm somewhat and Robin asked in a loud
voice if he had the worms?  The poor boy's face matched his arse at that!

     The lad was so tired that he was in bed and asleep long before Robin
and I were ready.  We were laughing as we wondered if Rowley and Peters,
who were sharing a room with Natty, would be kept awake as Natty, once
started, could talk the hind leg off a donkey.

     The next morning Freddy was still saddle-sore so more liniment was
applied.  It was rather arousing to stroke and caress the soft skin between
his buttocks and Robin made some rude remarks when we went to the privy to
relieve ourselves.  I said he could have the pleasure on our next stop.  He
laughed and whispered he had noted from the bulge in my nightshirt it must
have been quite a pleasure!

     In no way could young Freddy be on horseback all day again so we said
he must travel in the coach but could ride the last few miles to school the
next morning to demonstrate his prowess.  He didn't demur as we thought he
might.  His buttocks and thighs must have been quite painful.  That meant
Natty led his steed and we had the benefit of Natty's company and the oft
repeated tales of London Town!

     Freddy was restless at our stop for luncheon and complained of not
having anything to do.  Rowley suggested if he did not succeed at school he
might like to become a coachman.  A much happier Freddy sat on the box with
him and was allowed to take the reins.  Peters risked boredom by sitting
inside until he, too, got restless and took over riding Freddy's Prince. We
passed several travellers going the other way who shouted greetings at our
young steersman which pleased him mightily.

     The inn that night was most comfortable and the room we three shared
was warm and clean.  The goodwife had said when she showed us the
accommodation she would not allow dogs into her rooms and was glad we were
not accompanied by any as she abhorred fleas.  She said she had a good
remedy to keep fleas at bay in any case as the maids washed the wood in the
rooms with cider vinegar which had cedar wood steeped in it.  I remembered
what Lancelot had used on us in that hovel.  She nodded when I said my
cousin recommended a tincture of pennyroyal to be applied to the face and
hands. "That is known to me as well," she said nodding approvingly, "But I
can prepare a good quantity of the other which can be applied whenever a
room has been used."

     We joshed young Freddy and as he stripped ready for bed said we should
search his crevices to see if he harboured any of the vermin.  He giggled
and squealed as we held his arms above his head and inspected his armpits
tickling him and saying there were no hoppers there.  We turned him over
and spread his arsecheeks wide.  Robin rubbed his finger up and down his
crack which made him squirm even more. I noted there was still redness on
the base of his buttocks and said he should be anointed as any skinned lamb
to be placed on the spit.  I picked up my bottle of liniment and rubbed
more on the top of his legs over the redness but was careful not to allow
any to drip onto his little ballocks.  He oohed and aahed as the lotion
warmed him and as we turned him onto his back again I was tempted to hold
his stiffened peg in my dampened hand to warm that, too!

     He was not worried now with our seeing him naked and said he wished he
had brothers like us as he enjoyed our company.  Robin said he would have
had to make sure he behaved himself as big brothers did not like to be
disturbed by young creatures and he had two who had to be controlled.

     "I would be most pleased to be controlled by you," Freddy retorted
with a smirk.  He had his already warm backside slapped for that.

     We had arranged for a beaker each of hot rum toddy to help us sleep.
That was delivered just as Robin and I had donned our nightshirts.  The
potboy was about our age and smiled as he saw Freddy scrambling to get
himself decent as he had just used the pot in the cupboard.  "Thass
alroight I'da seed more 'an that most noights, young Sir!" he said, "Some
o' those wimmin do mek it a roight showing when they ha' to piss!"

     We had to laugh and Freddy was tickled again much to the potboy's
amusement.  "He be yourn brother?" he asked as he went to the door.  We
shook our heads and Robin said we would sell him for a shilling except we
had to deliver him to school where he was to learn how to empty the
Masters' pots.  I wondered if the lad believed us as he was shaking his
head as he closed the door behind himself as he went out.  But then we
heard him laughing as he went downstairs.  Freddy didn't know whether to be
angry or to laugh himself so we picked him up and put him in the bed and
climbed in on either side of him.  He was given his beaker and told not to
spill any as we would tell the goodwife he had wet the bed as the liquid
was quite yellow.  When finished he gave us both a hug before we all
settled and slept most soundly.

     The potboy was back in the morning to wake us.  "Thass a foine day,
thass is," he announced as the door thumped open and he came in carrying
two pitchers of hot water.  "Ma moither hass some most good heggs an' bekon
for you an' it's toime to roise."

     I looked at Robin.  I wondered if he was in the same state as me.  I
had experienced my usual morning rise!  There was no time or place to
relieve that particular ache and I knew from Robin's slow emergence from
his side of the wide bed he was in the same condition.  Nothing for it.
Nightshirts were discarded and two larger boys and a smaller one all with
stiff pegs washed faces and hands in the two bowls provided.  I asked
Freddy if he wanted more liniment and he smiled and said if Robin anointed
him this time.  I don't think Robin was so gentle in his application
because Freddy twisted and turned as the inside of his thighs were rubbed.
He was slapped and tickled again after that was over.  He was grinning when
he stood and, quite unabashed, showed off his still rampant young peg.  I
thought it would not be long before he and Lawson would be enjoying the
frigging he had yet to experience.

     The inn was most well-appointed with a separate saloon, as the
goodwife called it, for gentry where we had dined the night before and
where breakfast was served this morning.  Our trusty coachmen and groom
were also well-served but in a separate room.  Freddy had his coins ready
to give us for his accommodation for the two nights.  I said he was to put
them away as he had entertained us with his antics.  He did not know but
his grandfather had given me sufficient for his board and his victuals
during the day.  I calculated there would be some left which I would give
him as we approached the school.

     Our coach and all the horses had been well-cared for and Rowley
praised the head ostler on his management and I passed an extra half-crown
to him knowing we would be remembered for that largesse.

     Freddy was quite comfortable in the saddle for the last miles we had
to ride.  Rowley said he expected us to reach Ashbourne by midday and he
was correct in his estimate.  We had stopped for a little refreshment some
time before and Freddy said he had no soreness and was thankful he could
ride into school.  As we rode the last few miles we were joined by two
older boys in another House who had ridden only from Kedleston.  We let
Freddy have a little boast as he rode between them but we could see they
were most impressed with our complete entourage, especially with him on
such a fine horse.

     There were a number of carriages of different descriptions arriving as
we rode along the School driveway.  There were several already in the
courtyard and other riders were also dismounting.  Two of Freddy's young
companions were being delivered in a highly decorated coach as we stopped
and dismounted.  We found they were the son and nephew of Lord Paulton and
though they had shared his bedroom for a whole term Freddy had not known
their background.  When we went into the stable later Freddy said he would
have to bow and scrape to Perry now!  He grinned then and said he would
make sure the pair learned how to empty the pots if they misbehaved!

       First, though, the coach had to be emptied of all our possessions.
There were already men and boys carrying chests and bags to the various
Houses and two came over when Rowley beckoned them.  We checked that all
our baggage was clearly labelled so once everything was off the coach we
left the heap to be dealt with later by the servants.

     We bid goodbye to Rowley and Peters who both affirmed they had enjoyed
the journey.  I knew they would be well-rewarded by my father but I had a
crown extra each for them from my purse.  They were heading back to the
last inn where they would stay overnight so would probably have a superior
room with some of that largesse.  Rowley said they would be passing through
Derby on their return to Careby.  They had to find a particular pottery
there to deliver an order for several decorated pans for our new closets.
Steven Goodhew had made many enquiries and had been assured these were
superior to any other and had a special air trap invented by a Mr Cummings.
I think Rowley was rather bemused by this as I was, too, but he had two
drawings and descriptions of what he should find there.

     We made our way to the stable with both Natty and Freddy in tow and
there we had a great welcome.  Shem and Robin hugged each other as Mr
Darlow stood by and then he shook Robin's hand.  The horses had expert eyes
cast over them and were not found wanting.  Mr Dimbleby was sent for to
inspect his Castor and we hoped that would be the name he would agree to.
Freddy was congratulated on having such a fine mount and chose a stall for
his Prince next to Natty's Kerry.  George had not yet arrived and would
have to name his own horse which was placed in a stall beside Blaze.  There
was much amusement as Shem related that Master Branscombe had been brought
by another boy's father from London in his light racing chariot as Shem
called it.  He said he'd never seen one before and both Branscombe and the
boy had been sick as dogs with the swaying and rolling as the man had kept
driving for two days at a fast rate even with the state of the roads and
tracks.  He had changed the pairs at almost every coaching inn as the
horses were so tired at such a pace.

     Natty had to be introduced to all and I saw that he and Shem would
form a friendship.  I went to the forge outside with him and acquainted him
with Jack the farrier's lad.  I was able to tell Jack that Timmy was happy
at Careby and sent his best wishes.  I slipped him a crown piece, too, and
I knew he would keep an eye on Natty.

     Natty was no slouch.  He was not at all shy and went to all the men
and grooms and shook their hands and told them who he was.  I saw Mr Dowler
nodding and smiling and I thought our Natty would be a welcome fixture in
that good set of stables.

     Freddy said he had better go to find Matron and announce his return.
He solemnly shook our hands and said he was honoured to have been in our
company.  He thanked me especially for making him comfortable and grinned
at Robin saying he had rougher hands than me when dealing with liniment.  I
responded that I would be charging his grandfather for my physicking him
but handed over the coins which had not been used on his accommodation.  He
thought I was serious and tried to ask how much he owed until Robin cuffed
his ear gently.  Robin said he should buy Lawson a piece of liquorice which
looked like a cheroot so their arses wouldn't get tanned from setting fire
to hayricks and need a good dose of liniment.  He ran off laughing.

     After checking that someone would retrieve Natty's box and bags from
the heap in the courtyard we also went to Matron's room behind the kitchen
to report our own return.  She, as usual, sniffed being all too aware of
the aroma from our close contact with our mounts.  However, she gave a
forced little smile and said that Robin was a most welcome pupil and I, no
doubt, would see him to his accommodation.  She added that as soon as we
were washed and changed we could have some luncheon.  There was a good
amount of hot water in the washroom with a most attentive young Potts who
asked if Mr Lascelles was back yet.  I said we had been told he would be
late.  The boy grinned and handed us two towels.  "They be his own and he
left them with my mother to wash.  They'll be dry again when he comes in."
We stripped off our jerkins, shirts and vests and had a reasonable wash.

     We did not dress but wound the towels round ourselves telling young
Potts we would return them in good time.  Running to the door we nearly
knocked into Ham as he held the door open for us.  We stood on the stairway
for a moment as he informed us he had already hefted our saddlebags
upstairs.  Our chests would be brought across later.  I unwound my towel
and asked if he would take them both back to young Potts in the washroom as
they were Master George's.  He nodded and waited while Robin undid his and
handed it over.

     Although there were some noises from occupants along the row of rooms
we found both of ours to be empty but with fires lit and guarded by wire
mesh shields.  No Theo in mine, no Branscombe in the one to be shared with
Robin.  If George was late so would Maitland be as they would be travelling
together.  In our separate rooms we changed quickly into the decent shirts
and school britches and caps in our saddle-bags but had to keep to our
riding-boots until the chests were brought.

     We did look reasonably tidy now and there would be many others
arriving today in our condition so we made our way to the dining hall.
There was a goodly number of our schoolfellows already there.  I saw Freddy
conversing with two other Whelps and a cluster of Pups were seated at the
next table looking around wide-eyed.  Few of the older pupils were seated
for they were moving around greeting everyone as if they were long-lost
relatives.  Both Robin and I were of immediate interest.  First, we looked
so alike and, second, our fellows knew one of us had made a great leap of
fortune from groom to pupil.  What they didn't know and would not be told
was that Robin was now a member of the landed gentry even though his
ownership of God's Earth was but of a small quantity as of yet.  So we met
with many of our neighbours and fellow-pupils who thronged round and Robin
was greeted with many grins and handshakes.  Theo was the first to grab his
hand.

     "I am so glad to see you," he said, "My father was most amused about
the jape when you and young Tom changed places and I have a book and letter
for you from him."  He turned to me as others were ready to greet Robin.
"I've heard about your brother, too.  The Mayor came to the Palace for a
dinner on Saturday and said he had entertained a most engaging fellow named
Browning.  Pity he's getting married as the Mayor has a daughter ready to
catch the first fish in the stream."  He laughed.  "So far she has had
little luck as I think they swim away after the first glance."

     "Not the first fish," I said with a grin, "Any fish?"

     "True!  My brother almost got hooked but fled to London!"

     I looked for Robin as he had been carried away by others greeting and
speaking to him.  I beckoned him to come to the table as others were making
sure they had seats.  We were on the end so he sat opposite me and I was
next to Theo.  We were just in time as a monitor called for silence and
then said Grace.  There was one main course as usual and we filled our
plates from the tureen of thick stew held out by one of the serving-boys.
Theo was quick to half finish his and replenished it with another good
ladle full as the boys returned along the line. As this was happening he
turned to me. "You said there were plans for you to go to London at New
Year and I know you did as Branscombe is already here."

      I said I had met Branscombe in London and had also heard from the
lads in the stable of his hazardous journey back to school.  Theo nodded
and laughed.  "He was quite green when he emerged from the side of the
stable having been sick.  He is better now and you will hear more of his
journey, no doubt.  I have heard something of your adventures in London.
You've both been to the Tower which I have not.  He has spun me several
tales already so I want to hear more.  We both arrived back yesterday so
all we have done is just sit and talk.  I was in better luck than he as one
of the party at the dinner at home was taking his own proper carriage back
to Nottingham on Sunday.  I had that as the first of two quite comfortable
rides, for I then came on the Manchester coach straight here from the man's
residence."  He looked at Robin opposite.  "And did you have a fine New
Year?"  Robin laughed and said both Christmas and New Year were delightful.

     At that moment a familiar figure loomed and looked at Robin and me
sitting opposite each other.  It was Branscombe.  His eyes flicked from one
to the other.  "And which of you is my fag?" he asked, then slapped Robin
on the back.  "Welcome to Ashbourne, Master Goodhew!"

     Robin stood and with both grinning at each other they shook hands.
"Master Branscombe, I am pleased to make your acquaintance again and I hope
I will be a faithful fag," Robin said loudly and clearly and this was
followed by a series of 'hurrahs' from others seated near.  Two boys
already seated shuffled along to make room for Branscombe's hefty frame as
he manoeuvred himself onto the bench next to Robin.  A serving-lad brought
a platter for him and another held the stew tureen.  He helped himself to a
substantial amount of the appetising mix.

     He looked across at me as he waved a fork.  "I could not have
stomached this yesterday," he said with a laugh.

     "I hear you had a rather rough journey.  I suppose it must have been
like a storm at sea which you no doubt will experience when you are a Naval
man."  I smiled at him as I said this and added, "But are sailors always so
seasick?"

     The fork was waved again and he laughed even more.  "Don't twit me
with that, my lad.  My father says Milord Nelson took to his bed on every
voyage and father also confessed to more than queasiness when riding out a
gale.  I do not wish, however, to repeat that journey and neither does
young Preston who is still in his bed I hear."

     "What about his father?" I asked.

     "Sir George said we were just boys who couldn't stomach a good pace.
As my stomach was heaving most of the way I had to agree.  He drove like a
mad thing and said if we kept our eyes on the road we would not suffer.  As
the road pitched up and down and to and fro I pitched up as well..."

     Theo laughed.  "...But Sir George got you here safely and went off
with a view halloo and looked ready to jump the next toll-gate!"

     Branscombe shook his head.  "I did not see his going though I had just
breath enough to thank him and then lie on a pile of straw after my final
vomiting."

     A couple of our fellows looked rather wretched themselves after that
last statement.

     Theo saw this.  "Say no more, my friend, this good stew needs to stay
where I have just put it!"

     Branscombe just laughed and began to eat most heartily mopping up the
juices with a hunk of the good bread next his plate.  We all copied him and
then took good helpings of a treacle pudding all washed down with a tankard
of small beer.

     Talk passed to what we expected to find at school this term.  There
were to be football games between the Houses and the battle between
Ridley's and Carstairs' which was fought so gallantly last term was to be
repeated.  There was hope we would win this time.  I looked at Robin who
was listening to all this most intently.  He, no doubt, would enter such a
conflict with enthusiasm.  Hare and Hounds meets were also on the calendar
and these were more to my liking. I quaked inside somewhat when I realised
I had not exercised my legs in any village games or anything else over
Christmas and New Year.  I felt I should go for some runs if I wanted to
take part.  Another event was announced and that was a Sing Song in Great
Hall on Saturday evening.  No worries about that as both of us would play.

     Following that most substantial luncheon the four of us left the
others around the table as they were going to play at chess and other games
to while away the afternoon.  Robin had to be installed in his room and
unpack, as did I.  We found our chests had been brought up and Theo and I
left him with Branscombe as I said I wanted to unpack before George
arrived.

     I gave Theo the three books - two Latin texts and one Greek - I had
either been given by Uncle Digby or found in the stationer's shop.  I did
show him the striped shirt I had bought for George and that amused him as
he said he couldn't think of anything more suitable.  He had a present for
me of a fine edition of Aesop's Fables and a book of poems which his mother
had sent with her best wishes.  He also had a book for Robin together with
the book and letter from his father, the Bishop, welcoming him to the
school.  He said this promised any assistance should he ever need it.  Theo
was most impressed with the big Greek lexicon which Uncle Dodd had given
Robin and me for Christmas.  He was even more impressed with the two hams I
had taken out first as they were at the top of my chest.  "Keep those well
away from George," he said with a laugh, "But no, he deserves to be
rewarded if he learns well and he does get extra for us from the kitchen."
I put them back carefully under a parcel of clothing.

     I said I had been given a new flute by a lady in the village but Robin
had a violin which was thought to be too valuable to be carried to school,
so he had brought the one he played in the village band.  Theo wanted to
know about the At Home which Branscombe had attended and had heard about in
their chat together the previous day. I explained what I had played both on
the pianoforte and the flute and then said about the evening at Lady
Bridges.  He said their organist at the Cathedral had a musical Soir£Æ
twice a month to which various dignitaries, clergy and others were invited
and he had enjoyed the one given the previous Friday though he himself knew
little about music.

     I let slip that both Robin and I had also practised on the church
organ and I had played before and after a wedding.  He was highly amused at
my description of that and I also said about the inn we didn't stay at on
my return to Careby from London, the one where the wedding party was ready
to brawl.  He said that Mr Skrimshire was the master who played in the
school chapel and he would introduce us to him as he knew him as he was a
relation of a well-known physician in Peterborough.

     Time passed in more genial chat including telling about meeting with
George's brother and the good impression he had made on all the members of
my family.  Theo said he had not met him but was sure he was a fine fellow
from what George had told him.  I also said of our bringing young Freddy
Neville with us as a kindness to his grandfather.  Theo remembered the
firing of the rick and the beating which ensued.  I said young Freddy had
got over that and was a quite delightful boy who, though mischievous, was
thoughtful as well.  I related his story of his unhappy home and Theo said
he wasn't the only one to suffer in this way.  He was sure that many boys
were sent to school because parents could not be bothered with them at
home.  He said he had been quite unhappy when he first came to Ashbourne
but had persevered after feeling he had been rejected.  He realised now
that his parents only wanted the best for him but it had taken a time for
him to adjust to the feelings he had those years ago.  I had not heard that
from Theo before and realised I had been lucky in being brought up at home
until the decision was made for me to be admitted to the school at a later
age.  I told him this and said perhaps I was the luckier as I was able to
look on my first term as an adventure and I hoped this would continue.

     We warmed ourselves before the fire as we chatted and, then as it grew
darker, we had to light candles.  We shared a piece of a plum cake which
his mother had packed for him and I took out a packet of the bonbons and
told him the tale of the very grand emporium from which I had bought them
as well as the mint humbugs for my Uncle Digby.

     So it was quite dark when a great clattering was heard from the
staircase and passageway.  Of course it was George arriving back with
Gordon and Maitland in tow.  Our door was flung open and there was a great
whoop from George as Ham and Japhet came in first laden with bags and two
of the menservants carried in his chest.  He slapped Ham's head and said he
should hurry down to bring up the baggage of the others without delay.  As
the slap was accompanied by a couple of coins in an outstretched hand no
offence was taken.  The lads scurried off and George then rewarded the men
as well.

     "I warrant the pair of you have been lazing here while I've had to run
back to some damned village to get a wheelwright as we got a wheel off in a
great rut."  That was said as his greeting as he stood in the doorway
surveying us.

     "Good afternoon, George," Theo said most equably as we both stood.  I
bowed my head in greeting trying not to smirk.  "I am sorry you have had an
eventful journey but no doubt you were instrumental in ensuring your party
arrived back safely."

     George calmed down and rushed in and hugged us both in turn.  He
stank!  Even my nose was offended by the smell of sweat and horse.  "Am I
glad to be here and off that bloody road."  George seldom swore, so the
journey must have been disastrous.  "It all started with the coach being
overloaded with too many boys and too much luggage so I had to hire two
nags for Maitland and myself in Lancaster.  My arse is red raw and that
tough old bird Maitland can hardly hobble. We had to let Gordon loll in the
coach as he has a sprained ankle from not being able to skate properly."
He eased his britches as he wriggled and I knew liniment was needed!  I
hadn't told Theo about Freddy and his soreness, something for later!
George was still in full flow.  "Then Jevons slipped on the ice and broke
his arm so we spent half a day having it set by a surgeon and I had to take
over driving with the groom. That young Radcliffe we took on board in
Borwick got a sore backside as well as he was on a nag for the rest of the
way."  We gathered Jevons was the coachman and a very valued member of the
household staff at Garthorpe Hall.

     "George, I do not need to ask if you are hungry," said Theo with a
grin, "But you need to bath..."

     "...And I have good liniment as you know and you and the others can be
anointed not on the head as the Prayer Book says but elsewhere!" I said and
went to my chest to fetch my box of remedies.

     That cheered George up especially as Theo then said as soon as he was
clean and changed into good clothing he would be rewarded with plum cake,
...and a bonbon or two I added.  I took out my apothecary's box and found
an unopened bottle of liniment.  I followed George along the passageway as
he bellowed for Maitland to join him. Ham and Japhet were back with more
bags so they were sent to find Radcliffe who was a fag on the floor below.
Three backsides to be given treatment.  I think I would be commanded to
administer the nostrum!

     Theo and I followed George down to the washroom.  Young Potts must
have been primed as there was a good vat of hot water to be ladled out into
the baths.  George was stripped and in his bath before either Maitland and
Radcliffe appeared.  We were greeted heartily by Maitland who said he could
hardly walk after the horrible saddle he had had to endure.

     "Ease your arse in the hot water first, then young Browning will
anoint your hurts, my friend," announced George.  "And you, young Master
Bum-sore, take that bath there and Potts will fill it with soothing streams
and then I am sure you will receive kind treatment, too."

     Both Maitland and Radliffe looked at me as I held up my bottle of
balm.

     I had only seen Radcliffe at meal-times or merely in passing.  He was
my age but was in a different form.  He was a well-set up lad and had a
cheerful smile even though referred to as Master Bum-sore.  He grinned at
me and murmured "Yes, please".

     George, of course, was in and out of his bath quickly and, dripping
wet, stood as young Potts tried to dry his back.  Being much taller than
the diminutive youngster he had to take over the towel and finish the
drying himself.  He was also in luck as Theo had had the foresight to bring
down a shirt and pair of trousers which had been left in the room by George
over the holiday.  Before he drew on the trousers he bent over a settle
against the copper.

     "I shall be warm enough here for you to use that liniment on me," he
said and pointed down to the redness at the top of his thighs.

     I uncorked the bottle and poured a little into the palm of my left
hand.  I gave the bottle to Theo who sniffed it and nodded.  "Stay still
and part your legs," I commanded.  George had most hairy thighs and the
crack of his arse was a forest of tawny hair.  To grunts of pleasure I
massaged the tops of those muscular pillars working upwards with the
fingers of my right hand dipped into the aromatic liquid.

     "I do not want any you know where," he said as he held up his hanging
ballocks to remove them from my touch. "That liquor stings and you feel as
if your cods are on fire."  He looked over at Radcliffe who was being dried
more efficiently by young Potts.  "Ever had that, young sir?  Yours dangle
well so hold them high when the physician here physicks you!"

     I kept my eyes on my task as I did not want George cursing me for
fiery balls.  I made sure all his redness was well-covered and he wriggled
his arse and thighs as I finished.

     "That feels most comforting already," he said, "I thank you most
heartily."  He straightened up and Theo handed him his trousers which he
donned without any underclout.

     "Next!" I announced and Maitland took his place.  He was also hairy
with black whorls on his thighs but there was little within his crack.  In
fact it looked as if it might have been shaved clear at some time.  I had a
task to perform so I could not dally and certainly could not make
enquiries.  His redness was concentrated lower on his thighs where he had
gripped the saddle and he sighed as the warmth of the liquid penetrated his
skin.

     "You are a marvel, young Tom," he asserted, using my first name after
I said I had finished, "I am much obliged for that.  You will be
recompensed."

     I said all I wanted was him to be out of discomfort.  As he turned,
displaying a plump and lengthy pizzle which looked somewhat aroused, George
remarked that perhaps he needed anointing each day.  Maitland just sneered
at him and got dressed in the clothes he had brought down himself.  He
waved goodbye and left us.  While this was happening it was Radcliffe's
turn and he, too, bent over the settle with a towel around his shoulders.
He was not hairy like the others. Being two years younger he, no doubt,
would sprout more as both Robin and myself were noting about ourselves.  He
too, was black-haired and as he bent he displayed the back of quite a
low-hanging ballsack as George had said.  He remembered George's
instruction and immediately lifted that object from within the range of my
attention.

     His thighs being almost smooth were easy to anoint but he was redder
than either of the others.  I had to massage both thighs from almost just
above his knees right up to the fork of his legs itself.  No wonder George
had christened him Master Bum-sore.

     My ministrations took a little time and when I had finished he tried
to hide himself with the towel as he raised himself from over the settle.
I knew why and so did George who, with a flourish, snatched the cover away
from the lad who stood upright in more ways than one!

     "There is a mighty oak, eh?  And not an acorn before!" said George
slapping the lad's bare back.  "I am not breaking confidences when I say I
wish I had such a display when at his age."  The lad was grinning and
showing himself thus caused him no shame.  "We have shared a room for three
nights on this journey and at other times, too.  I have witnessed that fine
show each night and morning on each occasion.  I envy you, Master
Bum-No-Longer-Sore!"

     The lad bowed his head at me.  "I thank you, too, Doctor Browning.  I
knew I would get good comfort from you.  This oaf has sung your praises
from the time he first had soreness on this journey saying you had cured
him of more than one ailment since you have been here."

     "Oaf? Oaf?" reiterated George.  "I forgive you as our families have
known each other for two good centuries but I vow I will have you
grovelling in the mud when I tackle you mistakenly in the next football
game!"

     "Thank you," I said to the lad, ignoring George's interruption.  "My
friend Master Lascelles needs frequent treatment and I have a good number
of good remedies for almost anything which might befall him."

      Theo had been listening intently to all this badinage.  I wondered
also how Robin might feel if he was made to display himself?  Radcliffe was
not disconcerted at George's action and this hinted at a certain deeper
intimacy.  I wondered why Radcliffe had not been chosen instead of me as
George's and Theo's fag?  Perhaps it was because of a greater friendship
between George and Radcliffe which might not have been countenanced by Theo
in the sharing of the room.

     As Radcliffe got dressed so I re-corked my bottle and then all four of
us went back to the stairway to our floors.  George patted young Radcliffe
on the back as we parted at his level and I discerned a wink and a grin
from George to him.  I had much to think about and perhaps to discuss with
Robin from events and observations in the last half hour or so.

     That would have to wait as I had good news for George.  With all the
excitement of his arrival and the bathing I had thought it wise not to
mention the fine steed we had brought with us for him from Careby.  As we
settled in the room and George was supplied with a large slice of cake and
three good chocolate bonbons I said about the horse which was now safely in
the stable.  He was overjoyed and I was hugged and bussed on the cheek and
so was Theo, rather to our amazement and discomfort as George's lips were
smeared with stickiness from the cake.

     I said the gelding had to be named and it was all we could do to
dissuade him from rushing to the stable there and then to see the mount and
to rack his brains for a good name.  He asked if I had any ideas but all I
could say was that the horse was not the twin of Castor which was the roan
gelding for Mr Dimbleby so he should not think to call it Pollux.  He
looked rather askance at me then burst into laughter.  "You think I should
call him Bollux, but he has none!"

     "No, George," I said carefully, "It is true that the twins of Leda
were Castor and Pollux but this gelding has the same stallion but a
different dam from the one for Mr Dimbleby.  Wait until you see how fine he
is.  I led him on the rein almost all the way and he is very obedient and
will repay kindness I am sure.  My father was satisfied with his schooling
and would not have let him from our stable unless he was first-rate."

     George smiled.  "I will ask you, Theo and Robin to accompany me
tomorrow when I inspect this fine beast.  A name will be found which will
match him, I am sure.  I will sleep so happily tonight and we will ride out
tomorrow even if I am still sore."

     The school clock struck six so we had more than half an hour before we
need ready ourselves for our supper.  During this time I gave George the
shirt and I was hugged again after he had stripped and tried it on.  The
book of Lyrical Ballads caused a look of incomprehension until Theo started
to recite Mr Coleridge's 'Ancient Mariner' and said George should read Mr
Wordsworth's 'Tintern Abbey' which was also included there and was very
fine. He grinned and said he would study that and astound his compatriots
in Mr Prior's form with his erudition.  I also showed him the hams and his
face lit up.  "I have dreamed of that succulence we had last term.  I have
something, too, in my box but that can wait."

     We decided to see how settled Robin was with Branscombe and Maitland.
There was subdued noise from each room as we passed along the corridor.  We
could hear laughter in the room by the stairwell.  George rapped and the
door was opened by a grinning Branscombe. "Come in," he invited us most
cordially waving the piece of cake he was holding, "We have been hearing of
your trials and tribulations, George!"

     "And you are laughing and making mock, no doubt," he said as he pushed
Branscombe more or less aside.  "Maitland, you rogue, what have you been
saying.  I risk life and limb to see you here safely and all you do is
laugh!"

     "Dear George," Maitland said as he too munched on a large slice of
cake, "I was just telling of that night with you in Radcliffe's nightshirt
and the serving-maid blushing as she thought you were making advances on
her person."

     "Dear God, it was a pickle I admit," George said with a giggle
himself.  "How was I to know in that poor light that the wretch had put his
nightshirt by mine and I picked it up in mistake.  It was a mite too small
and this wench knocked and entered thinking we were the party of old maids
in the next room.  I was pulling it back off over my head and she must have
seen a prettier sight than any old maid has and screamed and rushed from
the room."

     "And what do you know old maids have?" asked Theo, "Have you been
gawking around the Almshouses again?"

     There were shouts of laughter at this.  Poor George!

     "Davis, that was in confidence," George said levelly and using Theo's
surname which he rarely did, but we could see he was not annoyed.  "I was
curious and I was ten and what I saw was something which caused me
nightmares for a good week.  With those hanging dugs and the badger fur
below I thought old Mrs Trotter was the witch my brother Augustus had
described to frighten me.  He was much amused when I confessed of what I
had seen and showed me a drawing in a book of what I might expect with
someone much younger. That did not help me much at that age, either."

     "A book?" asked Branscombe, "And do you have it still?"

     George shook his head.  "It was from our Library and I could never
find it again and Augustus just laughed and said I was not holy enough to
discover such things. Why 'holy' he would never tell me."

     "The Library?  I would say that was the last place to find you,
George," Branscombe said.

     "That is true.  I doubt I have been in there a dozen times and only
when locked in because of some misdemeanour."

     "Only a dozen misdeeds, George?" asked Maitland, "I know you have been
whipped for many more."

     "And you, too, when you were at Garthorpe with me.  It was your fault
we were caught with my father's best shotgun.  You said you had heard he
had ridden off to appraise a farm and would be away all day.  It was my
misfortune that he heard a shot and rode up just as I had winged a good fat
partridge and scared the covey away while many were still nesting."  He
laughed and pointed at Maitland.  "I had six strokes but you had three for
being with me."

     Both Robin and I had been grinning at this exchange.  It was our turn
now.  George looked from Robin to me.  "You may smile but I wager you have
not been good little angels before you arrived here."

     "It depends on what you mean," said Robin, "All boys in our village
have been whipped for things which our elders consider to be youthful
crimes.  Some we have considered to be most unfair as when Tom, I and Titty
Hayes had three cuts apiece for throwing mud at Mistress Wheeler's clean
washing but we dared not say who it was as they were bigger boys..."

     "...But we did get our revenge as we hid while they were swimming in
the river and stole their clothing and they had to run home naked holding
their privy bits in case old Mother Caudle saw them and would tell the
Constable," I continued with a straight face.

     "'Titty'? Is that a boy?" asked Branscombe who was clutching the front
of his trousers in imitation of our quarry.

     "Yes," said Robin with a laugh, "He is Titus and his brother is Gideon
so is Giddy."

     "Boys will be boys my dear father says but we still get chastised,"
said George and pointed a questioning finger at Maitland, "But we didn't
come in to hear dubious stories but to see if you are treating your fag
with due kindness."

     Maitland looked askance at George.  "As you well know we did not have
the privilege of a fag this last term and I have only experienced the heavy
hands of Cravell and Villiers for those two years before they took the
primrose path to Oxford."

     Theo laughed. "I have to tell you, Robin, that both those were over
six foot and spent their time sparring and boxing and used poor Maitland
when they could catch him as their punching bag."

     "At least I could run faster than the pair of them but they were good
fellows really.  All bluster and peacock proud," Maitland said quite
proudly himself.  "Villiers boasted he had a different cravat for each day
of the month and said his father had been taught to tie his properly by
Prinney's valet.  If that was so he never taught his son as he was late
each morning for Chapel and felt Pullen's switch on his arse most days."

     Branscombe then made some comment that his fag-masters had been kindly
brutes as well and he knew he would have his future brother-in-law to
contend with if he were unkind to their nephew!  This caused a deal of
hilarity and the whole story had to be recounted again with no
embarrassment to either Robin or myself.  Of course, Robin had still to
meet his 'Aunt' he said and would complain to her if he was mistreated.

     Branscombe clapped him on the back and declared he had better start by
being tidy and to put away all the debris he had strewn around from his
chest and bags.  I chirped up and said all looked ship-shape and Bristol
fashion already which caused Branscombe to thump me on the back as well.

     "Any cheekiness from you, my boy, and we will have you swinging from
the yardarm!"  he averred and I got another thump.

     "Who is boasting of their yard?"  George asked and wrinkled his brow,
"As long as his arm, eh?  Is that so, Branscombe?  I have not seen such
evidence when you have bathed in the river.  Perhaps the cold water has an
effect?"

     Branscombe grinned at George.  "I have enough to satisfy my needs, my
friend, and I warrant you have compared others, too, and are not a slouch
at taking care of things."

     This was all new.  I had not heard this level of lewd talk before only
that exchange which Megson had objected to and those dreadful things Black
Jack had stated.  But was this lewd?  I doubted it as it was just schoolboy
banter and I knew full well that George was not averse to pleasuring
himself each night and was no slouch at that!.  I had been commented on as
well on those efforts which in my little experience had been called lewd by
Zebediah when fulminating against 'the sins of the flesh'.

     "That may be so but all this nautical talk is strange to country folk
like me," George said, "I have no desire to sail the high seas unless Her
Majesty commands me to."

     "Hear, hear!" said Maitland forcefully.  "God has given us a good
island to keep our feet firmly on and all we hear are journeys here and
there discovering places and things which were best left where they lie."

     "But you would not have potatoes or sugar," said Robin, "Nor would we
have Her Majesty as her forbears are not of this land."

     Theo laughed.  "And we would not have that Australia to send our
convicts too, nor the Americas everyone praises as a land of plenty and
enterprise."

     "No time for all that," said George rubbing his belly, "My stomach
tells me that food is needed and plenty of it.  Robin, I will get no sense
from any of these.  Are you settled?"  Robin said he thought he was but
time would tell.

     We all laughed and left the room with Branscombe telling Robin not to
forget to lock the door to keep possible convicts out.

     A trail of hungry lads gathering others on their way entered the
diningroom.  More of our fellows had arrived but there were still
noticeable gaps.  I did not see either Aubrey Bayes nor his other
fag-master, Collett, but a limping Gordon had joined the trail.  I did espy
young Freddy Neville who was deep in conversation with two others, Lawson
being one no doubt.  He saw me looking and, I thought, wanted to
acknowledge me for he smiled.  But as I was older it would not have been
appropriate.

     But, as we sat, a table was rapped and one of the senior boys
announced that breakfast in the morning would be at eight o'clock with
Chapel at ten o'clock and all should go to their usual Master's teaching
room at two o'clock.  There was a murmur, as it meant more time in bed
according to Branscombe; proper lessons would begin on Friday.  I looked at
Robin who shrugged his shoulders but at that moment Japhet appeared with a
note for Robin.  He quickly scanned it and grimaced.  George, ever in
charge, asked what it was.

     "I am commanded to attend on Mr Ridley at nine in the morning," he
said and passed the note to George.

     "With your fag masters' permission I will accompany you and see you
get there safely!" George said looking quite pious.  I knew that a visit
would be made to Mrs Ridley and I wondered if the parrot had been taught
any new words.

     "If Chapel is over by eleven we could have a good hour's riding before
luncheon at one," I said to George, "You could also name your steed."

     He looked so satisfied and nodded.  "That would be most pleasing."  He
must have thought of his soreness.  "And is there a good saddle?"

     "Fit for the most illustrious posterior," I said to hoots of laughter
from those sitting near.

     As the main course of cutlets, with a mash of potatoes and carrot,
began to arrive so discussion turned to a name for George's mount.  I
explained its provenance as out of Bella by a roan stallion I had heard
referred to as Barnaby.  Theo murmured that 'Bolingbroke rode on Barbary
Roan' emphasising the change of name.  He then had to explain it was from
Mr Shakespeare's Richard the Second whose horse Barbary Roan really was.

     "A king's horse, that is so grand," said George, "May I call my steed
just 'Barbary'?"

     "And you could be a Barbary pirate," said Branscombe.  "My father says
they are the most feared on the coast of Africa."

     "And I have heard of Barbary apes which inhabit Gibraltar," said a
voice from behind us.  It was Aubrey Bayes looking rather untidy and
accompanied by Collett who asked what all the merriment was about.

     Spaces were made for the pair and, after George's expostulation that
he was no ape, we heard that the six who had travelled by one of the London
coaches were late as a wheel had started to collapse.  Luckily it happened
as they were leaving the inn this morning so a wheelwright was at hand.
"Tired and hungry," said Collett who then shovelled four large cutlets onto
his plate.  As two were the usual ration the serving-boy was rather
disconcerted.  He dared not say 'Greedy pig' but the look on his face told
all. George had seen the action.  He smiled at the boy and inclined his
head.  His lips did form the word 'Pig' and the boy smiled back.  George
was well-known and liked in the kitchen!  I was not too fond of Collett
after hearing his remark about Robin last term so George's response gave me
a little pleasure.

     Collett set to and the cutlets and mash disappeared in record time. He
then surveyed the rest of us ranged on the benches who had also finished
and were supping our tankards of ale and waiting for the second course.
His eyes flicked between me and Robin sitting opposite.  He could say
nothing as it was quite apparent he could not tell us apart.  Our long
hair, eyes, noses and mouths were so alike we could be brothers, if not
twins!  Aubrey had finished his two cutlets more slowly and looked at me
and winked.  I nodded back and he raised a hand in greeting.

     George had not finished with the naming.  Having dismissed any
aspersions about ape-hood he said he was still of a mind to give the horse
that name if he thought it fitted.  "We will all come to the christening,"
avowed Gordon, who had been remarkably silent during the discourse, "I have
a flask of good whisky and will anoint the beast's brow with a wee drop!"

     "I'd rather have it on my tongue," said George.

     "That is for later as I telled you," Gordon said firmly and his Scotch
accent became more noticeable.  "There is to be a Sing-Song on Saturday and
it is for after that."

     A Sing-Song!  I had forgotten about it.  I grinned across at Robin who
nodded.  "And will you dance?" I asked Gordon.

     "Mebbe," he said and nodded his head from side to side, "I canna know
yet a'cause o' ma ankle but I hae a Scotch ballad or two I can sing.  And
you will play for me?"

     "You will have two of us with Chapman the accordion player," I said
and indicated Robin who played an imaginary fiddle as illustration.  We
would have to see if he had the music for his songs and practice them.

     Several fine fruit pies were brought in and divided amongst the no
doubt still hungry horde.  A great tin bowl of boiled custard was carried
round and a ladle each was given out.  Even George looked replete after
that.

     Tables were cleared and many settled to games as usual.  I saw Collett
now looking at Robin.  "I wish to speak to you," I heard him say quietly,
"Would you come outside a moment?"


To be continued:

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