Date: Tue, 14 May 2013 16:24:35 +0000
From: Jo Vincent <joad130@hotmail.com>
Subject: Tom Browning's Schooldays Ch 58

			 Tom Browning's Schooldays

				    By

				   Joel

			    Chapter FiftyEight


Branscombe left us when we arrived back at Charles Street.  He was
concerned that his new suits might not appear for he wished to be
well-dressed for the Dinner that evening.  I said no one would be looking
at him; they would be more interested in his sisters and their fine
dresses.  He was about to give me a dig when the other four boys all said
they agreed with me which set off laughter all round, even from Cedric.

     We had a late and simple luncheon in the breakfast room as there was
much scurrying with servants preparing the large diningroom upstairs and
Signor Bartoli was busy supervising preparation of dishes down in the
kitchen.  We learned there were to be twenty- eight seated.  The youngsters
were included but warned they would not stay for the whole thing as the
meal was expected to last at least three hours and they needed to be
well-rested for both Friday and Saturday.  Guests were expected from
seven-thirty and the dinner would begin at eight o'clock.

     Both Lancelot and Rass joined us.  My father and Uncle Dodd were
lunching with my Uncle Digby in his study.  Lancelot was very pleased with
himself.  The messenger had returned with an invitation to visit Professor
Bayes at ten o'clock in the morning.  The note had said he was most
interested in the possible applications of electrical power.  A postscript
had been added that hearing I was in London Aubrey would be pleased to see
me, too.  I would have to send a card in the mail and say that Robin was
also with me.

     Rass was seated beside Freddy and I think the lad was a little
apprehensive at having yet another clergyman around him.  However Rass had
the boy and the rest of us entranced for he told of his recent visit to a
coal-mine where he had witnessed the changing strata as the great bucket
descended.  He said he had taken samples and there were small fossils
embedded.  Robin said we had been shown fossils within coal during one of
Mr Ridley's classes and wanted to know if it was true they were ages old.

     Rass smiled.  "Ages and ages I am sure.  A Frenchman at the end of the
last century thought the earth was seventy-five thousand years old.  From
Mr Lyell's writings I am sure it is much older than that.  If all the
layers I have seen have been laid down slowly then it must be a million or
even many million more years than that."

     Robin wanted to know more.  "How can you say millions?  I cannot think
of such a large number."

     "You have seen how the river in Careby rises and falls over just one
year and new layers of silt are brought down," he said and Robin
nodded. "Lancelot has said how the river at Moss Hall has changed its
direction.  As silt builds up so new channels have to be made.  Is that not
so, Lancelot?"  He nodded, too.  Rass continued. "If animals or plants are
buried in the silt they decay but something may be left like hard bone so
these would become your fossils as layers and layers of mud accumulate.
This is a slow business but we know now now that valleys and gorges have
been formed by water eroding them over thousands and thousands of years."
He waved his right hand up and down.  "We can see the strata sometimes in
very clear layers.  I hope to travel to America at some time and look at
the strange formations which have been described there."  He looked at me.
"Your cousin Nicholas has sent me sketches of some of the places he has
visited and has invited me to New York where he lives."

     This was the first time I had heard Nicholas mentioned in company.  I
had been told he had gone to America as an architect and I knew Uncle Digby
was not his father.  Another reason why Robin had been so readily accepted
by our family.

     Robin was still questioning.  "One of our fellows says that the earth
cannot be as old as that because there is the Bible history whose years can
be counted back."

     Rass shook his head.  "That is a notion which many eminent divines
still hold.  However, a close reading of the old Hebrew documents and
scrolls show many discrepancies and many hands in the writing of that
history.  I would prefer not to make a hasty judgement on that.  I think we
must put the Bible and the earth side by side as two pieces of evidence of
God's goodness to us."

     "That explains what Mr Ridley told us.  He suggested that Megson..."
Oh dear, I had named him.  "...should learn Hebrew and perhaps things might
be clearer to him."

     "Dear Tom," Rass said with a laugh, "The more you learn the more
complicated it all becomes.  Is that lad to come to Cambridge?  Perhaps
even St Mark's?"

     "I do not know," I said, "I think he has one more year at Ashbourne."

     Luckily, conversation then turned to discussing America rather than
Megson and his views.  Freddy was puzzled about Red Indians until Lancelot
explained they were misnamed as the first explorers thought they had
reached India.  I think we all decided we would like to visit that strange
land and I said perhaps we might find Liam and Niall's parents and
families.  Both Rass and Lancelot said it was curious that no enquiries had
seemed to be made about the boys but as they had moved from Liverpool to
Careby during the course of some seven years they were not surprised.

     We were told that as all the servants were busy we should entertain
ourselves and we were not to venture out unaccompanied.  This did not
concern us as the prospect of the Dinner in the evening was exciting and,
as we made our way upstairs, outside our rooms were untidy heaps of books.
A note on each decreed 'To be shared and read.'  Uncle Digby had cleared a
shelf or two ready to be filled again!  As we were sorting through the
piles Freddy was called down again to play the pianoforte with my Aunt
Matty listening and instructing him as she had decided she did not need to
visit any more shops.

     Jabez did appear at four o'clock looking rather harassed as he had had
to count out enough knives, forks and spoons for the twenty-eight and then
had been set to sharpen the knives and polish the silver.  There was quite
sufficient bread, preserve and sweet pastries in the breakfast room to keep
hunger at bay until the gong sounded for dinner.  We had barely finished
eating and drinking when a further commotion outside meant hampers of new
clothes had arrived.  Jabez was back, this time with Mehmet, as the
contents were apportioned out.  Luckily, Branscombe's had been sent
separately to the other house.

     Time then had to be spent in washing ourselves and donning clean linen
before trying on the new tailcoats Robin and I would be wearing both
tonight and at the wedding.  There was much preening as we surveyed
ourselves in the large mirror set in the side of the closet.  A little
later we made the three youngsters parade before us to check that they were
presentable.  I must say five smarter boys would have been difficult to
find.  Of course, we had to be inspected by my mother and aunts and were
declared as perfect as we knew we were.

     We were sent down just before seven o'clock to Uncle Digby's study to
be under the watchful eye of my cousins Lancelot and Rass so we would not
untidy ourselves!  Uncle Digby had already been taken upstairs by the
hoist.  We boys amused ourselves by sitting round the seance table with the
three young ones taking it in turns to be the disreputable Madame Maurice
and the decoy causing great amusement.  Mr Purrett came to the door to
announce that Captain Branscombe's coach was at the door.  Fancy, using a
coach to travel fifty or so yards!

     We seven quickly made the journey upstairs to the big drawing room by
means of the servants' stairs for we had to be assembled to greet the
guests who would ascend by the main staircase.  Others were already
standing or sitting.  Uncle Dodd and Aunt Matty were chatting to my Uncle
Billy and a lady I recollected from the New Year's Ball as Lady Cornwallis.
I could see my father had a new tail suit and my mother had a most
beautiful dark crimson long gown with her rope of pearls.  As well as my
sister Hatty and her husband were my two brothers resplendent in their full
Hussar dress uniforms.  Two other officers were also present.  Captain
Bemrose was one and the other I took a moment to recognise.  Of course, it
was Cornet of Horse the Honourable Geoffrey Lascelles.  These two officers
were talking to my cousin Rosamund who seemed to have eyes only for
Geoffrey!  Uncle Digby had been wheeled to the entrance and was talking to
Mr Topping in his full Wright livery.  My Aunt Fanny was looking towards
the staircase awaiting the entry of the six members of the Branscombe
family.  Just inside the door was a table, laden with glasses and bottles.
By this were three others, Jabez, Mehmet and Paolo, also arrayed in green
and gold.

     My Aunt Fanny turned and nodded both towards the assembled family and
guests but also at Jabez who, with Paolo, deftly began to extract the corks
from several bottles with the discrete pops which told me champagne would
be circulating.  Mr Tolliver came to the doorway first and stood and
announced each of the Branscombes as they entered.  Cedric came in last and
was followed by Mr Purrett and Mr Pembridge.  Seven liveried footmen all
told!

     Introductions had to be made and flutes of champagne were soon being
handed around.  I heard Jabez whisper to the three young ones that they
were allowed a half glass each and I saw none were abashed when they were
introduced to all and sundry. There were smiles all round for they were
perfect young gentlemen.  They then stood with my Aunt Matty and Uncle Dodd
and I saw them making careful observation of everyone as my aunt spoke to
them quietly.
     As soon as he had been introduced around to everyone else Cedric made
a beeline for Robin and me.  "If I hear another word about whether green
satin or blue silk is better for showing off one's best features I shall
run screaming to the river and jump in!" he said through gritted teeth.

     Robin was quicker than me.  "May I enquire which you have chosen for
your new drawers?" he asked without a hint of a smile.

     "With your dark hair I would recommend a purple organza," I added.

     He relaxed.  "I am so glad you are here even though you are a couple
of cheeky young fags."  He turned to view the other guests who were talking
avidly and quite loudly with Torquil and Elizabeth standing together and
greeting everyone as if they were a married couple already.  "Is that
Lascelles' brother?" he asked, almost spilling his champagne as he
gestured.  Geoffrey was now alone with Rosamund and there was something in
the looks they were giving each other.  Oh!  I had also noted that Captain
Marmaduke Hastings was not present this evening!

     "Yes," I affirmed after deciding there were matters which would have
to be discussed with Jabez, "He has but lately been commissioned in my
brother's troop."

     "That's your uncle there...," He obviously meant my Uncle Billy, "...I
saw him at that big parade with the Duke.  He's a General isn't he, but
he's not in uniform?"

     On parade he had been quite resplendent in cloak and cocked hat and
after, in the Officers' Mess, we saw him sporting the sash of his newly
conferred knighthood.

     "He told me he was averse to wearing his uniform when off-duty," I
said rather curtly still looking at the interchange of smiles between
Rosamund and Geoffrey.

     Branscombe nodded.  "Your cousin the clergyman.  He is most erudite.
He was telling me during dinner at the inn in Bedford all about John Bunyan
and why his ideas were different from the established church.  I am afraid
I did not follow most of his discourse."  I grinned as Erasmus's
parishioners were often bemused by his sermons.  I said that he had just
been appointed to a Fellowship at Cambridge.  Cedric grimaced.  "Too much
learning for me, but I would like to spend more time with the doctor."
Bangs, crashes, smells and severed heads, I thought.

     Cedric's mother was now talking to Lady Cornwallis and turned and
beckoned him over.  "I must depart," he said quietly and Robin and I
exchanged glances as he walked with straight back to the other side of the
room.

     "Scarlet silk I would surmise," Robin whispered and took a sip from
his glass.  "It would go well with the silver ring."  My sip of champagne
almost went down the wrong way.

     It was our turn to make the rounds for my mother signalled that we
should stand by her first.  I saw Uncle Billy give Robin a very searching
look before putting an arm round his shoulder.  He introduced us both to
Lady Mary as his nephews and she was most gracious as we bowed our heads in
greeting wanting to know if we were to join the Regiment when older.  Uncle
did not let us down but answered for us.  "This pair will have other things
to occupy them I am sure."

     "Lampshades," was the greeting we received from my brother Terence.
He was standing alone as Captain Bemrose was talking to Arabella and
Geoffrey Lascelles to Rosamund.  True!  All of them, including Torquil, had
enough gold braid...  I thrust Frenchmen from my thoughts.  "Having your
fill of London, eh?" he asked Robin,

     "Of that smell, I would agree.  Does the sun ever shine?" Robin asked
with a grin, "That yellow murkiness was even inside the Cathedral."

     "I think it is only on the third Thursday of the month," said Terence.
"I believe I saw it once in September though it might have been one of
Lancelot's misplaced experiments."

     We told him then of the explosive grains and how Branscombe and Freddy
had made loud reports.  Terence was highly amused.  "I remember when we
were much younger he made fire-crackers which we lit and threw from behind
a hedge as Squire Matthews came riding out.  We think his old nag would
have won at Newmarket if it had been ten years younger and the Squire a
little less weighty!"  That was one tale he hadn't recounted when his
broken leg was mending.

     He nodded towards the Honourable Geoffrey.  "I think we may be hearing
something soon.  And there's always Uncle Billy!"  He touched the side of
his nose and the three of us nodded.  I inclined my head towards Captain
Bemrose and Arabella.  "Yes, I think so, too," he said quietly and we all
sipped our champagne.

     He must have noted that the three youngsters, standing by my Aunt
Matty, were looking at him as she was saying something.  "I think I am
being discussed," he said and strode over to where they were all standing
and we followed.  He smiled.  "Aunt, I know those two..." He indicated
Philip and James.  "...and this must be Frederick."  Freddy looked up at
him not at all shyly while the other two bowed their heads in greeting.

     "Yes, sir, I am Frederick Neville," he said very confidently.  "Have
you been in any battles like my grandfather?  Mrs Dodd said she did not
know."

     "No, Frederick, I have not.  I did have a battle with a hedge and
broke my leg but we have no enemies who might wage war with our great
country.  We are ready, though, should that ever occur again."

     "That I pray will not happen," my aunt said, "There have been enough
in the past but our soldiers and sailors will see we are kept safe.  Is
that not so, Terence?"

     "Aunt Matty, we are to serve our Queen and country whatever may
befall."

     Time had passed quickly as Mr Tolliver now came to the door.  I saw
him and Aunt Fanny exchange slight nods.  A moment or two later the gong
sounded and everyone smiled expectantly.

     Freddy must have been primed for, guided by my Aunt Matty, he marched
up to Mrs Branscombe, bowed and asked if he might escort her to the table.
James did the same for my Aunt Fanny.  Philip was next and bowed to Lady
Cornwallis which meant Robin and I were in line and required to squire my
mother and Aunt Matty.  I noted Terence was with Jane Branscombe and the
other ladies and gentlemen followed in pairs as we all moved into the large
diningroom.  This was quite a picture as it was lit brightly by candles and
lanterns with silver and glassware shining and twinkling in abundance.

     The sumptuous dinner followed the pattern of the New Year's Day
repast.  Course followed course with fine wines complimenting each of the
main dishes.  I know I had three glasses, two of red and one of white wine,
and matched my neighbours, my cousin Rosamund and Jane Branscombe.  What I
had experienced at New Year was now surpassed.  Each mouthful of food was
exquisite.  There were murmurs of delight all around the table as the
tastes and the flavours were savoured and the enjoyment was such that
neither Jane nor Rosamund mentioned the wedding in chatting to me.  There
was great praise for Signor Bartoli whose expertise was so evident.  I
would, however, have to speak sharply to Jabez who nudged me deliberately
twice while serving me with a second delicious venison cutlet.  I did stop
myself from drawing my elbow back sharply into his soft parts as I
preferred to have the ladle of delectable sauce over my cutlet rather than
over my new suit.

     Just after nine o'clock the three young lads were escorted out by
Jabez and Mehmet.  Rosamund whispered that they would not miss out on their
sweet courses as she knew they would be served in their bedroom.  At ten
o'clock the last dishes were removed from the table and the ladies
withdrew.  Port was circulated with a glass each for Cedric, Robin and me
but as soon as that was drained my father signalled we should also
withdraw.  I think he meant just Robin and me but Cedric followed us and
the three of us went up to the bedroom preceded by Jabez.

     Cedric was patting his belly and was somewhat unsteady on his feet.
"That was some feast!" he declared.  We agreed - what else was there to
say.  I think all three of us were more than slightly foxed by the wines
and all I remember was carefully removing my new tail suit and underclothes
with Jabez's help, having a quick piss and crawling into bed.

     I awoke to laughter.  It was Jabez who was standing by the bed
surveying me and the other two still sleeping creatures.  As I moved in the
bed I realised I was naked, but so were the other two as I had one of
Robin's arms around my shoulder as he faced me with Cedric pressed up
against my back!

     Jabez leaned over me.  "There are three sleeping beauties in the other
room as well.  At least they've got their nightshirts on!"

     The nude figure behind me grunted and then farted.  He shifted against
my back.  Something long and hard pressed into me.  It was time for me to
move, I thought, before either of us enjoyed it more!  I managed to slide
from Robin's grasp and Cedric did move slightly.  Jabez snorted as I
emerged from under the coverlet and I was on display.  Luckily he did not
comment as I, too, was also sporting my usual morning hardness though he
did not yet know Cedric's condition.  We both did then for Cedric
immediately woke, shaking his head and stating loudly that he needed a
piss.  He did not best Jabez but what was on display as he hurriedly left
the bed was most sturdy and caused both Jabez and me to snigger.  "One
more?" he mouthed as poor Robin was uncovered and turned.  He, too, was
also 'stiff as a poker'!

     "'Tis a common happening," Jabez said as Robin kicked about having
been so rudely awoken.

     Robin still had his eyes shut as he tried to sit up.  "Oh, my head,"
he groaned.  One eye opened.  "I might have known.  Let me sleep."  He
flopped down again and I, being good-natured and friendly, covered his
nakedness so he was not like Noah, though I was his uncle and not his son!

     We were disturbed again by Cedric and his farts.  At last he was
finished and the water closet flushed.  He was not abashed being naked as
he came back into the room.  He was flaccid now and grinned at us.  "I had
but six glasses all told and cannot remember being put to bed here."

     Jabez was not abashed either.  "Mr Branscombe, sir, I counted nine
without the three glasses of champagne beforehand."

     Branscombe laughed.  "That may be so.  I am no scholar so counting
that far is beyond me.  I have not enough fingers!"

     "Sir, the Reverend Dodd told me once when I was being chastised there
are natives who count 'one, two, many' and I needed many strokes to keep me
on the straight and narrow.  I received three."  Jabez recounted this with
such a sanctimonious look on his face.

     Both Cedric and I laughed at this.  I had heard it before but I, too,
needed to visit the closet for two reasons, preferably three, but the third
would have to wait.  As I crawled out of the bed I contemplated that 'many'
would suit very well for the times I had to release those passions I was
experiencing so often.  I was not so rampant now but was grinned at by the
pair of wretches and I saw Branscombe wink at Jabez.

     While safely ensconced in the closet I heard Robin being rolled out of
the bed and complaining that his head hurt him.  "Young boys should not
drink so copiously," I heard Cedric intone most unctuously.

     "I am not used to such fine wines," Robin replied quietly as I
strained to hear the exchange.  "Let me lie there a while longer, please."

     "Then you should sup more slowly and savour each delicious sip,"
pontificated Cedric and I responded to that sanctimonious statement with a
loud fart of my own which seemed to echo in the close confines of the small
room.  My straining had caused that, I thought!

     "Boy!" Branscombe called out loudly, "Do not add to the stench of the
roadway!" He was ranting on then to Jabez and Robin. "I have to pinch my
nose to bear just the walk between here and along the street.  There is
horse-shit everywhere and I fear each time I step from the carriage or
descend the steps from the house I might find myself up to my waist in it
and ruin my clothing..."  There was a moment's silence during which I wiped
myself clean now and made the water flush.  I opened the door and looked
out.  Robin was lying on my side of the bed with the coverlet just over his
legs and private parts.  Cedric had his hand on Jabez's shoulder which was
not an usual stance for a gentleman and a servant.  But then, I think Jabez
had demonstrated to us he was no ordinary servant as were the others of my
uncle's attendants.  "Jabez, my friend," Branscombe sounded rather
pleading.  "I cannot wear my tail suit to return to the other house.  May I
ask if you would retrieve some suitable clothing for me from my room
there?"

     I emerged and went over to my large cupboard to retrieve some clothes
of my own.  "Might you not run the few yards yourself wearing those red
satin drawers you were wearing under your tail suit?" I asked as I opened
the door.  "I must tell you, Jabez, he is quite fleet of foot when in a
Hare and Hounds chase!"

     Cedric let go of Jabez and strode over to me.  I was grabbed
unceremoniously and lifted, big as I was, and laid over the settle with my
arse in the air.

     "Jabez, you told me that you had in general three cuts for any of your
misdemeanours, is that not so?" Cedric asked.  Before Jabez answered, for
he was chuckling loudly, I received three sharp slaps on my bareness.

     "Do you not mean the green taffeta drawers with lace edging, Master
Tom?" Jabez said coming over to me.  "I have folded those neatly for Master
Branscombe's valet to remove them to the other house."

     There was muffled laughter from the bed and I could do nothing but
laugh as well as I rolled up to a sitting position.

     Cedric was taken aback for a moment then roared with laughter.  He
thumped Jabez on the back.  "I don't have a fucking valet nor green taffeta
fucking drawers!...."  He clapped his hand to his mouth.  "...I must watch
my language.  Pardon me, gentlemen."  He stood by me.  "Tom, I would say I
have had more enjoyment these last days since leaving Ashbourne than in all
my life before."

     "Long may it continue," a voice came from the bed, "But we have to
return there soon."

     "Do not be so despondent," I said, "Each day we are there is one day
less..."

     "...But one day less in our lives," said Branscombe.  He nodded his
head.  "I must admit I do not regret being at Ashbourne except for the
drudgery of much of the learning.  I doubt there will be opportunity to
converse in Latin with natives of some far-off land when I arrive to
re-provision my ship."

     "Ah, but you may need to say a Latin grace before they place you in
the cooking-pot!"  said Robin from the safety of the bed.

     There were laughs from all at that sally.  Jabez looked up and down at
Branscombe's sturdy naked figure.  "I think if I were the cannibal chief I
would chose that fine haunch to gnaw on first," he said and most
presumptuously patted Cedric on his rump.  Cedric was not disconcerted.

     "Jabez, I shall think of that most kind gesture when I have you
press-ganged and kept confined ready for my crew to dine on if shipwrecked
on some deserted isle," he said and put a hand again on Jabez's shoulder.
"I would say that from the sight of you in those tight britches last night
there would be a great rush to carve a slice from those buttocks of yours
and even more if Mehmet was served up with you, too."  He reached down and
stroked rather than patted Jabez's well-rounded backside.

     "Sir, 'tis a pity that the press-ganging is no more now that Boney was
defeated all those years ago or I might have served with you willingly but
not if it meant being on the water," Jabez said with quite a courtly bow.

     Cedric laughed.  "I say 'tis a pity, too.  I would have you to serve
me at any time.  Nay not as a servant, more as a friend, eh?"

     I had not seen Jabez redden since he was caught acting the maid in an
old gown of my mother's to make us boys laugh.  I think Mr Clements gave
him three cuts for that which must have hurt for by pulling off the gown
with Jabez almost naked underneath his underclout descended to the floor.
I was but ten or so at the time but caught Mr Clements' sleeve and begged
him not to chastise Jabez too severely.  I think he was laughing also but
all I remembered was seeing Jabez's even then quite lengthy pizzle with his
small patch of dark hair above it and he was but thirteen.

     "Sir, I must know my place," a now-blushing Jabez said. "I would value
to be of service to anyone in your family and most especially to you.  With
your and Master Tom's permission I would say you have the kindest heart as
I have witnessed when you are with young Master Neville.  That in a
gentleman of your standing will earn the respect of all good men."

     Branscombe was smiling.  "Thank you, my friend, for whatever you may
say."  He emphasised the sentiment.  "I have been well-taught to value my
fellow-men.  My father is strict but I have observed that he always treats
even the most menial with courtesy.  His greatest friend is Bosun Ross, I
would say.  He and my father were aboard their first ship on the same day.
My father as a fourteen-year-old Midshipman and Archie Ross as the cabin
boy and just twelve.  My father says they weathered so many storms together
with one or other holding the bowl for the seasickness what else could they
be but friends.  They served together until my father retired and Bosun
Ross is now the factor of our estate and my father would not shift without
his advice."

     "A cabin-boy at twelve?" Robin queried as he crawled out of bed and
joined us as I stood.  "But then I forget that Admiral Nelson was also
aboard his first ship at the same age."

     Branscombe was nodding.  "That is so but he was a clergy son.  Archie
Ross was a poor Scottish crofter's son and he has said he was the youngest
of fourteen and had no choice but to make his way South."

     Both Robin and I whistled at that.  "The youngest of fourteen?"  I was
shaking my head.  "We have large families in our village but that is more
than I know of."
     "He came down the road from Scotland with two older brothers and all
became Navy men.  His brothers have since emigrated to Canada and now own
boats on the Newfoundland trade."

     Robin made his way to the water closet as we other three grinned and I
flapped my hands towards him.  "He will no doubt add to the stench," I said
to Cedric and Jabez.  There was a quiet but still audible fart as the door
closed on him.  I turned to Jabez.  "If you do not go and collect some
clothes for Master Branscombe he is likely to be on exhibition and close
inspection by those youngsters very soon."  I grinned at Cedric.  "I would
say that young Philip would make even a better fist at portraying..."  I
stopped as Jabez was not privy to the knowledge of that drawing from under
the floor.

     Jabez stepped away from Cedric.  "If I may be excused I will comply
with your request."  He looked at me.  "I am excused?"

     "Of course, but do not tarry chatting to the parlourmaids!" I said and
winked at him.

     He was off with a grin.  I wondered with what he might return.

     As the door closed Cedric was full of praise for Jabez.  He said he
was sure he would not remain as a servant.  I thought so, too, surmising
that Uncle Digby might have particular plans for his future.  Cedric then
asked what were our plans for the day.  I said Robin and I would be
visiting Aubrey Bayes as Lancelot was consulting Professor Bayes. I did not
say we would be collecting our signet rings.  I did say I knew Freddy was
being taken to play for a Mr Bennett who was Rosamund's piano teacher and
that Philip was going elsewhere about drawing.

     "So I am to be bereft of company?" Cedric said with mock dismay.

     "I think it could be arranged for you to have another massage.  We
will ask Jabez," I said, "he will know what time my Uncle will have
received his."

     Cedric was smiling then.  "I would be most pleased if that could
happen.  In fact, if I may, I would ask to remain here rather than
returning to the other house."  He dropped his voice.  "My mother said at
dinner last night she had several more purchases to make..."

     "...And a dutiful son?" Robin queried.

     Cedric laughed.  "Will keep away from being dragooned into
accompanying her as the chief bearer!"

     We had forgotten that Jabez had left two pitchers of hot water on the
hearth from when he had awoken us.  Using towels to grasp the hot handles
we filled the two bowls ready for Robin and me.  Being kind-hearted we let
Cedric have one, as well as a small cake of sandalwood soap, to make
himself clean while we shared the other one.  We managed all this without
too much splashing and quite amicably shared the towels.

     Both Robin and I were able to dress and Branscombe did say we looked a
neat pair.  We were just combing each other's hair when a knock at the door
heralded Jabez's return.  He was carrying two quite sizable closed wicker
baskets as he entered and Cedric strode over to him and took one.  He put
it on the table and opened it and drew out a lady's chemise.  He almost
bared his teeth at Jabez as Robin and I guffawed when he held it up.

     "What the shitting hell is this?" he demanded and just about flung the
object onto the fire but Jabez caught it.

     "Sir, you chose the basket," Jabez said quietly and calmly, "Your
clothing is mainly in the other one but your sister Miss Arabella asked me
to give the chemise to Miss Rosamund to see if she knew where it may have
been purchased as she wishes for more like it.  I put it on top as I was
just about to descend the stairs."

     Cedric did laugh then.  "I admit I chose that basket but only because
you swung it towards me.  You are a rogue, Jabez!  I apologise again for my
language, though, but only until the next time."

     "Sir, I would not wish to displease you," the rogue said and could
hardly stop himself sniggering.  He then pointed to the other basket which
he had placed on the floor. "Sir, will you require the services of a valet
to assist you?  Otherwise I must go to rouse the others."

     Cedric shook his head.  "I am quite capable of putting my own drawers
on as long as they are not green taffeta."  He waved his hand at Jabez.
"Go off and disturb some other poor creatures!"  As Jabez bent down to pick
up the basket Cedric also reached down and gripped his arm.  "But you may
return and dress my hair for me.  I need a gentle touch like those I see
exchanged between Tom and Robin."

     That was a wrong thing to say as Robin immediately tugged the comb
quite roughly through my hair causing me to utter a most unseemly word
primed, no doubt, by Branscombe's ready use earlier.  Robin tapped my head
sharply with the comb.  "Now, Uncle Tom, you should not get your hair in
such a tangle."

     Jabez made his way quickly to the door and sniggered as he closed it
behind him.  Cedric was rather nonplussed.  I played my part.  "Do be
careful what you are doing!" I said raising my voice, "I am not used to
being treated so roughly by a menial!"  I deliberately employed the term
Cedric had used earlier.  He looked quite shocked until I could not contain
myself and sniggered as well.

     "Am I to be hoodwinked by a pair of jackanapes again?" Cedric
demanded.  "I shall be tempted to employ beating of fags such as occurs in
Pratt's or Carstairs'.  The last one to arrive when Frampton of Carstairs'
calls gets three cuts and some of those seniors in Pratt's deliver six.  I
think I'll settle on four!"

     "I do not think I would answer any call," I said shrugging my
shoulders, "Any of those lubberly fellows would have to catch me first."  I
looked at Cedric who was still standing naked almost by me.  "Most are too
addle-pated to know if they are putting their drawers on the right way so
would desire help for that I'm sure."

     "Like anyone we know?" asked Robin.  He swung his arm so the comb
pointed at no one in particular, then swung his arm back past Cedric and
finally, quite nonchalantly, held the comb towards those pendulous
bollocks.  "My father says that any light-witted fellow has his brains in
his nether regions."

     Cedric just let out a guffaw then tried to grab me as standing
nearest.  I easily evaded his grasp.  He held up both hands as if in
surrender.

     "I do need help," he said, "Which basket are my drawers in?"

     I opened the second basket which had trousers and stockings at the top
and nestling below was a fine pair of linen drawers.  "Plenty of room for a
big boy in these," I said holding them up.  Cedric did manage to grab them
and almost unbalanced as he hastily lifted one leg and then the other
putting them on.

     He said nothing as Robin handed him an undervest and shirt from the
other basket.  We watched as he continued dressing and clapped as he
finally tied his cravat before he donned his jacket.

     "Only my boots now," he said and sat on the settle by the fire.  These
were handed to him and as he put them on Robin stood back.

     "Thank you, Master Branscombe," Robin said with just a hint of a
smile, "That was a most instructive lesson on how to dress oneself.  I will
commend you to Mr Pretyman to be taken on as assistant to Matron for the
Pups and Whelps..."

     He got no further as Branscombe launched himself from the settle like
one of Her Majesty's warships from its dock.  Robin was caught in a tight
grasp and bussed on both cheeks.  "Nephew-in-law, or whatever from
tomorrow, you and that other scallywag have proved to be the most welcome
friends and companions.  Long may it last!"

     I was not excluded as he also managed to clasp my arm and then clapped
me on the back.  I did not know which I might prefer, the kiss or the
thump?  Robin turned and held up the comb.  "This can be completed before
Jabez returns."  Cedric sat again and between us with comb and brush we
tidied his locks and tied a small pigtail with a neat black silk bow.

      It was well all three of us were dressed by now as there was sharp
rap on the door and three others entered accompanied by Jabez.  All, like
us, looked most neat and tidy.

     Freddy was full of excitement.  "Miss Rosamund has sent a note I must
be ready for ten o'clock for we are to go with Mrs Browning to Mr Bennett
for him to hear me play."

     Philip was a little quieter.  "I am to go with Lady Fanny and Mrs Dodd
at eleven with my drawings but I do not know where."

     James had a smirk on his face.  "I must go to the breakfast room as I
am hungry and that is now!"

     We all agreed with James though giving the others a hearty 'Good
morning' greeting.  Cedric said he had better make his presence felt at the
other house or his family might think he had been kidnapped by pirates.  I
saw Philip look at him keenly when he said this.  I imagined another
drawing might be in mind.  As we got to the bottom of the stairs Mr
Pembridge was standing there.  He said he would accompany Cedric to the
other house.  Jabez was needed for serving breakfast.

     The breakfast room was already inhabited.  The three Dodd men were
there with my father and a busy Paolo was filling plates.

     "Is this the rest of the tribe?" my father asked.  "Are you washed and
dressed ready for this fine day?"  As if by magic there was sunshine
clearly visible through the window.  We all bowed our heads in greeting and
Jabez ushered us into seats and we were soon tucking into another meal
though most had only finished eating and drinking just a few hours ago.  My
father looked us over again. "Errands and visits today I hear.  I must have
some exercise so Rass says he will accompany me on a ride to Hampstead
village.  He can say his prayers on horseback like those Dissenters do,
eh?"  Rass demurred from saying anything.  Uncle Dodd just wrinkled his
nose.

     "I must go to the Cathedral to meet the Dean." he said, "I hear he
wonders what all the fuss might be about a simple wedding.  I think we
country folk will show him how well we conduct ourselves."

     That left only James who had no pressing business that day.  As we
left the breakfast room I found he was to accompany my aunts and his
brother on their visit.  So all was settled.

     Our trio had to be moving by half past nine as Lancelot was to be at
Gower Street to meet Professor Bayes at ten o'clock.  Both the Professor
and Aubrey were waiting in the College courtyard when our carriage drew up.
Aubrey was very pleased to see us and as Lancelot would be with the
Professor in his experimental room for the rest of the morning and probably
the afternoon he was admonished to show Robin and me as much as we wanted.
We found the three of us would be lunching with the Professor, Mrs Bayes
and Aubrey at twelve.  A visit to the British Museum after that was
possible.

     Of course, as before, there was much to see and do in the College.
Rufus was there again and demonstrated several strange machines.  Another
student showed us how the manufacture of dyes was being advanced with very
smelly chemicals involved.  We found there was some rivalry between the
King's College near the river and Gower Street but Aubrey had been making
enquiries about the progress with the electric telegraph.  I and Robin
watched, quite entranced, as he and another student sent messages between
two of Professor Wheatstone's improved models set some thirty feet apart.
Mr Stubbs, the student, explained that this distance was nothing and he
envisaged that machines might be set up one day with the wires running
under the sea to France or even, in the future, between England and
America.  As neither Robin nor I could imagine such distances it was far
above our heads or below our feet.

     Mrs Bayes was most welcoming and we had a nourishing stew, as Aubrey
called it, but sat in silence as the Professor and Lancelot continued
talking all through luncheon about the electrical apparatus that was needed
for the pump.  At the end Mrs Bayes said it was quite a normal luncheon
when her husband was busy with a new commission.

     Our carriage was ready to take Aubrey, Robin and me to the British
Museum but we could only have an hour and a half there.  It was all as
Natty had described and I could have spent many hours just looking at the
Egyptian remains which we were told were being donated almost weekly and
many were not on show.  Time was too short and we thanked Aubrey most
profusely when we arrived back at Gower Street to await Lancelot.  Aubrey
said he was pleased to see us and had materials for Robin and he to 'play
with' as he put it.

     Lancelot was not late as we had feared and we were able to have time
to drive from Gower Street to Piccadilly to collect our signet rings from
the jeweller there. We heard that the Professor thought all problems could
be solved concerning a continuously working electrical motor and he and one
of his students would assemble that to be joined to Lancelot's device. This
would be constructed from Lancelot's drawings by the artisan and his
assistant who made all the apparatus used in the experimental rooms. The
major problem would be the production of suitable electric cells to be
joined together to provide the electric power to turn the motor.  However,
Lancelot was most pleased as he said between them they would write a paper
for some learned society which was always a useful recommendation.

     The jeweller was smiling broadly as we entered his shop.  He produced
two most handsome small boxes in which rested our rings engraved to
perfection.  "For two young gentlemen like you I would charge only two
pounds," he said rather unctuously.  We both passed him a sovereign and we
received a shilling each back from our deposit.  I spied some fine silver
cravat pins at seven and sixpence each and asked for five which took up
thirty seven shillings and sixpence of the two sovereigns I then handed
over.  I whispered to Robin one was for him so he purchased two more for
his brothers.  Lancelot was most amused at such extravagance but his
amusement turned to thanks when, back in the waiting carriage, I gave him
one in its box for him to wear in the Cathedral tomorrow.  My other three
were for me, for Freddy and for Robin's and my new 'uncle', Cedric
Branscombe.

     There was much news on our arrival back at Charles Street.  First, we
had to inspect the three polished and shining coaches ready for the family
to be taken to the Cathedral in the morning as well as the smaller
carriages for the servants.  I managed to tell Natty, who was busy mixing
feed for the horses in the stable, that we, too, had visited the Museum and
it was so very interesting.  "That Cathedral will be something to wonder at
tomorrow," he said, "I am to be on the coach that carries you, Master Tom,
and I have been told I must wait inside the porch to signal when the
coaches are to return.  That is something I would never have thought."

     Secondly, there were two even more excited boys in the Library with my
mother, Aunt Matty, Aunt Fanny and Rosamund.  Both had quite stupendous
stories to tell while Robin, Lancelot and I would partake of the tea things
spread on a side table..  My mother signalled to Freddy to be first as we
three sat with a plate of pastries each.

     "Mr Bennett is to write to my father and say he would be willing to
take me as a pupil at the Academy in two year's time if I may have lessons
when at School.  Lady Fanny says I may live here if that is so."  He
bounced up and down on his seat.

     My mother was smiling and nodding.  "Frederick did very well.  I think
Mr Bennett was most impressed.  Rosamund is of the same opinion."

     Rosamund leaned over and took Freddy's hand.  "Mr Bennett told me he
had been reminded of his own playing before Dr Mendelssohn as a boy.  He
asked Freddy if he had written any music but he said no though he had many
tunes in his head.  He was most amused at that and said those tunes should
be put on paper."

     "I will do that, ma'am, but I will need more proper paper like the
pieces Mr Bennett gave me," Freddy said looking up at Rosamund.

     "That is being done," my Aunt Fanny interjected.  " Mr Purrett has
been sent to a music shop he knows and will purchase whatever is necessary.
He is most musical himself and sings in the choir at the church we attend.
He has taken James with him and I have given instruction he should take
whatever the music-seller suggests."

     "I will write to Freddy's mother and tell her quite forthrightly of
the plans," my mother said.  "And I will, too," added Aunt Fanny with a
determined look on her face.  Mrs Neville did not know what might be
arriving in the mail as she would only just be aware that Freddy was in
London!  "Letters will also have to be sent to Mrs Dimbleby," my mother
said.  "If she is unable to give Freddy lessons she will know who can be
relied upon.  It will all be settled."

     Aunt Fanny looked over to Philip and smiled at him.  "You have a story
to tell as well."

     Philip looked most serious.  "I did not know what was to happen but we
drove to the National Gallery and Mr Harrison was waiting for us there.  He
said I was to meet Mr Eastlake who had commented on the drawing I had done
of Mr Harrison's sons.  I did not know but Aunt Dodd had some drawings from
my mother for Lady Digby to show Mr Eastlake but he said he would look
later.  He put a piece of paper in front of me and asked me to draw a
straight line.  When I had done that he asked me to a draw a triangle, a
square and then a circle.  I did as asked and all he said was I would be
accepted as a pupil at the Royal Schools when I was fourteen.  Mr Harrison
was laughing and said 'A young Giotto?'.  Mr Eastlake explained that he was
a famous painter and architect who had been discovered drawing as a
shepherd boy and was also asked to draw a circle.  He said my training
would take ten years and that frightened me but Mr Harrison said he would
be my guarantor and I could live with his family."

     My Aunt Fanny was laughing.  "What did Mr Eastlake say after he looked
at your drawings?"

     Philip reddened.  "Please, ma'am, I was disconcerted."

     "He said you could teach some of his pupils even now, didn't he?"

     Philip nodded and dropped his head but then looked up and smiled.  "He
asked me then to draw a horse and rider statue he had on a table.  It was
most beautiful and he said it was brought from Rome.  I could but make a
start though he said he was most satisfied."

     My aunt laughed.  "You did more than start and that was only in the
time that it took for us older folk to drink a dish of tea."

     I was so pleased that both boys would have promising futures but I
thought then of James.  What might he do?  I knew I should not worry.  If
Philip would succeed as an artist then James would be a writer.  We heard
that James and Aunt Matty Dodd had spent the time while Philip was with Mr
Eastlake looking at the paintings on display in the Gallery.  Aunt Fanny
said she was so pleased that a very busy Mr Eastlake, who was the Director
of the Gallery, had given the time to see Philip but she knew he had liked
the drawing of the boys.

     Robin was all smiles, especially for his brother.  "I must assume that
John Harrison would be pleased as well."

     Philip looked up at his big brother.  "Mr Harrison said he thought I
might be a good influence on that scamp of his."  This set all off in
laughter.

     It was my turn.  "I have something for you, Freddy.  This is to remind
you of this happy day."  I handed him the box with his cravat pin in it.
As he opened it so Robin gave a similar box to Philip.

     "This is for you from a very proud brother."

     I gave Robin his box and he said he had one for James on his return.
It only remained for Cedric to receive his before setting out for the
Cathedral tomorrow.

     Lancelot had been listening to all this recital in silence.  "Everyone
has had a most successful time today.  I have, too, but I will not bore you
at the moment with all the details but please excuse me as I must tell my
Uncle Digby."  He stood, bowed towards the ladies and departed.

     As the door closed my Aunt Matty raised a hand.  "No doubt we will
hear all at dinner this evening."

     When the ladies had been shown the cravat pins they said we would all
be judged the smartest of the company on the morrow.  We then also excused
ourselves and Robin and I went with the two younger lads upstairs where a
most attentive Jabez said he would see the pair would rest before emerging
for their dinner.

     As soon as we were in our room Robin and I hugged each other and said
how happy we were as we paraded in front of the pier glass with the pins in
the cravats we were wearing.  We were of one mind that the signet rings
would not be displayed that evening as we had plans for the morrow and
their eventual disclosure.

     Jabez was soon back and had quite a tale to tell.  He said he had been
sent to fetch Branscombe so he could have a massage after my Uncle Digby
had his this morning.  Jabez was sniggering and pointed to the bed.
"Master Branscombe was more than aroused as Mehmet was massaging his back.
It was most provident I had placed two good towels under him for as Mehmet
rubbed the oil into his buttocks and kneaded them he groaned and twitched
mightily.  He more than dampened the towels and blushed like a maiden.
Mehmet said softly he was no different than many of the young men who came
to the Baths.  It was quite a common occurrence, he averred, which
mollified your friend who said he was glad he was no different from
others."

     Both Robin and I were grinning.  "Where are the towels?" I asked.

     Jabez put on a straight face.  "I have not had time yet to send the
wash basket downstairs to the laundry."

     Robin was quicker than me.  He had lifted the wicker lid and withdrew
a much bespattered towel.  He nodded.  "That is him," he said with a laugh.
"He hides his washcloth each morning before going to the wash house but I
have seen it when he has forgot.  He is more copious than Maitland and this
is evident here."  He looked at Jabez.  "He matches you, I would say."
Jabez snorted and nodded.

     "Boys have different amounts," Jabez said with his nose in the air,
"Some dribble little, others spurt greatly.  And it matters not the size of
their cods."

     "Here speaketh the Master!" Robin intoned and dropped the towel back
into the basket.  We all laughed as Jabez cupped his hands from small to
large and decided we were all well-equipped and all spurted rather than
dribbled!  He should know, the evil boy!

     I wrote a note to Cedric thanking him for being with us and
congratulating him on being joined to our family on the morrow.  I
addressed the sheet to 'Our Uncle/Brother-in- Law C' and both Robin and I
signed our names to it.  Jabez was most amused and took the note and the
box with the cravat pin to the other house where it was delivered into his
hands and his reply was of the order 'I'll skin the little wretches!".  At
least there were no unseemly expletives and Jabez remarked Cedric had
smiled as he said it.

     At dinner that evening all the tales were retold and Lancelot was most
succinct in his telling of electric cells and magnets in coils which turned
to make the pump work to push air through his device.  My father asked if
this meant that boys would become obsolete as these new-fangled things
would mean many tasks could be accomplished without their aid.  Lancelot
said he did not think so and more arduous tasks might be found for them to
keep them from getting fat and lazy.  All boys present remained silent!

     Everyone was told we must retire early as coaches would depart at half
past nine in the morning with breakfast no later than seven.  We had to be
at the Cathedral before Torquil arrived from the Barracks with Terence as
his supporter and, most definitely, be seated before Elizabeth Branscombe
and her father appeared.  There was something else planned as my father and
the Dodds exchanged a number of knowing looks and all Uncle Dodd would say
was that he and Rass would set off with the Naval Captain from next door
even before us.  "With your preaching gowns!" my father added.

     Even if boys were to be early to bed there were important things to be
accomplished.  As soon as Jabez bid us goodnight and extinguished the
gaslight as he left the room so Robin and I were busy showing we were no
slouches in spurting our seed even to our chests.  Cedric's towel was then
employed and Robin was sure we both matched the amount of dampness he had
made.  Our nightshirts were donned again and with a goodnight kiss we slept
most soundly wondering what marvels the next day might bring.

To be continued:

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