Date: Thu, 18 Feb 2016 21:25:32 +0000 (UTC)
From: JoshRJosh
Subject: Gay Male incest.  A Brothers Love (2) Part 23

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(Again forgive the typos.  Happy Valentine's Day next week)


A Brother's love (2)    part Twenty-Three



We met David in the locker room.  He was already naked and stepping into
his suit.  Aaron and I undressed and put Speedos on.  When we entered the
pool area, Aaron said, "I feel like that skinny kid again."

David said, "Knock it off.  Those lanes there with the red flags, those are
slow lanes.  No one is going to get annoyed and try to push you aside.
Just get in and enjoy yourself.  You'll be swimming, jogging and working
out with us soon enough."

I smiled at Aaron.  "See he can be a butt hole too."

I followed David to the far end of the pool.  I said, "I yell in my sleep."

He looked at me.  "Sometimes, yeah."  He stared at me.  "What?"  I shook my
head.  He said, "Josh, what?"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"When we were younger, I would tell you, but then it just didn't seem to
matter to me."

"But I wake you up."

"Josh, don't get all weird about this.  When you start tossing and wake me
I just put my arm and leg over you and that ended it.  I kind of like
sleeping on you," he said and smiled.  I sighed.  He said, "I should have
told Aaron not to say anything."

"No.  No, I want to know.  You think this happens when shit happens with
Dad?"

"I know it does."

I nodded.  "So, then it will stop now."

"Yeah, after a while."  I started walking again.  He grabbed my arm.
"Josh, don't let this bother you, please.  I don't mind and Aaron didn't
seem to mind."

In nodded.  "Okay."

I swam behind David and had a good workout, but I couldn't stop thinking
about the screaming at night.  Every once in a while, I'd stop and check to
see if I could see Aaron.  After about 45 minutes I noticed him sitting in
the bleachers.  I stopped and waved him over.

"You done?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty worn out."

"You want to get dressed?"

"No.  I'm fine just sitting and checking out all the near naked beautiful
bodies."

I smiled.  "We'll be done in about half an hour."

Matt walked in as we were dressing.  I introduced him to Aaron.  Matt
introduced us to good-looking guy, Phillip.  We chatted for a while and
then left the locker room.  David said, "That' his new boyfriend."

"Really?" I said.  Aaron glanced at me.

"Yeah, they've been dating for about a month.  He's not a swimmer.  Someone
he met in some class he was taking."

"Seems like a nice guy," I said, feeling disappointed.

We went to the Taco restaurant.  I warned Aaron about the spicy hot sauce,
but he claimed to love it hot.  When he bit into his soft-shelled chicken
taco, his eyes widened and he laughed.  "Oh my God."

"Told you," I said.

"Too bad about Matt," David said.

Aaron glanced at me.

"Yeah, I guess, but there are plenty of gay guys to meet.  Besides, we'll
be friends.  It will be cool for Aaron and me to have a gay friend who has
been here for a year."

"True."

On the way back we stopped at the grocery store to buy food for dinner.  We
decided we'd see a movie that night.  Walking to the apartment, I said, "I
think Aaron should put on a show for us."

He laughed and shook his head.  "That's not fair.  I don't know what to
do."

"Ah, you jerk off," David said.

"And pose," I said."

"Pose?"

I said to David, "He has to go first.  This will be good."

We put the food away and then undressed.  "Where do we do this?"  Aaron
asked.

"In the living room," I said.

Aaron pulled down this briefs and out popped his erection.

I smiled and said, "Tell me you're not into this."

We went to the living room.  David and I sat on the sofa.

Aaron stood facing us.  "It feels so weird doing this."

"Look at your dick," David said.

It was rock hard and pulsing.

"I know, I'm so turned on.  I don't get it.  I mean it's scary being looked
at by the two of you."

"Don't start with the skinny body stuff.  You look hot," David said.  "And
I'm into women."

I said, pointing to David's erection, "But hot guys turn him on, so that
says you're hot.  Now, get busy."

"Show me some poses."

I smiled and shook my head.  "Just pose like you'd want one of us to pose."

"So, you'll pose the way I do?"

"Okay," I said.  "Just start or I'm going to have to do the nut cruncher."

He laughed.

He began to stroke his cock.  He chuckled.  He turned to his left and
stroked.  Then he turned to his right.

David said, "I think you should show him how it's done."

"Sit down," I said.

I stood and began stroking.  I sat on the floor and stroked with my legs
spread wide.  I played with my balls.  I lay down and stroked.  Then I got
on my knees and turned my ass toward them pushed my cock between my legs
and stroked.

"Damn," Aaron said.

"It's like another leg," David said.

Aaron laughed.

I lay flat on my back and began stroking hard.  I was getting close.  I
decided to give Aaron a real show.  I flipped my legs over my head and
pressed my hips toward my face.  I opened my mouth and pressed further
until I got my cock head into my mouth.

"Oh wow," Aaron said.

David said, "You can lay down beside him.  It's a better view."

Aaron was down in a flash.  "Oh wow," he sighed.

I stroked, licked and moved my cock head over my tongue.  Aaron was lying
on his side inches from me.  David was lying of the sofa.  I was pressing
my cock head against my tongue and moving it back and forth.

"I'm going to come," I moaned.

I held my cock an inch from my mouth and dropped my load.

I swallowed.

I licked the last drop of cum off my cock and the lay flat on the floor.

"Damn," Aaron said.  "I wish I could do that."

I laughed.

Aaron went next.  He really got into it.  He lay on the floor and moved
around and into different positions.  He got on his knees, his ass in full
view and pressed one finger then two into his butt hole as he jerked off.
Then to my surprise he rolled his feet over his head.  Both David and I got
down beside him.

He chuckled, stroked his cock, opened his mouth and came.  It looked like a
huge load.  He swallowed.

"Fuck," he said.  "I can't believe what a turn on it is to be watched.  I
felt like my body was on fire."

David said, "You were a real turn on to watch.  You've got to give up on
this bad body image that you've got.  I don't generally find guys
attractive, but you are."

"I think you are too," he said.

David smiled as he began stroking his cock.  "I know.  And, just so you
know, I'm not coming in my mouth."

"How about your face?" Aaron said,

"How about your face?" David said, stroking his cock.

"Sure."

David laughed.  "I was kidding.  I'll come on my face, but just for you."

Aaron said, "You can come on my face.  That would be hot.  Josh has come on
my face."

"That's okay."

David stood and masturbated, stepping close to Aaron.  I watched Aaron
blush.  Then he lay down and stroked his cock.  Aaron glanced at me and
then at David.  David sighed loudly, half sat up, pointed his cock at his
face and shot his load.

The first shot hit his forehead and hair, then he got his nose and cheek
and then his mouth.  The rest fell onto his chest and stomach.

We each took turns in the shower.  Aaron grabbed his book.  I spent time
organizing my stuff in the dresser and closet.  David read in bed.  The
three of us helped make dinner, ate and then walked to the movie theater.

We undressed for bed.  Aaron said to me, "You usually sleep naked."

"Ever since I can remember, except when we went to my grandparents' and
skiing."

"I won't grope you if you want to sleep naked."

"He might hump your leg," David said.

Aaron laughed and said, "I'm cool with that.  Just don't come."

I pulled off my briefs.

"Me too?" Aaron said.

David pulled off his briefs and climbed into his bed.

"Go for it," I said, lying down.

Aaron took off his briefs, turned off the lights and then started to climb
over me.  As he spread his legs, I reached for and grabbed his balls.  He
laughed and squirmed.  Lying beside him, I said, "I hope I don't wake you
guys up."

David said, "Don't worry about it."

Aaron said, "If you do, I'll nut crunch you."

I laughed, but felt embarrassed.

Aaron and I spent two more days at UX before we headed back.  We jerked off
each day, but not putting on a show.  David brought up porn on his
computer.  Aaron showed him some sites he didn't know about.  We watched
straight, bisexual and gay porn and jerked off.

Driving back, Aaron said, "That was cool of David.  I mean I'm sure he
doesn't usually do stuff like that."

"AH, no, he doesn't.  Like I told you, he's into women, but he's really
cool with stuff like that with certain guys.  He had Bolts friends that he
jerked off with.  Some guy on the Bolts used to give him head and he's
messed with a guy at UX."

"Matt?"

"No, another straight guy or mostly straight."

Silence.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah.  Just thinking about sleeping at your house tonight."

"Josh.  It's fine.  I wish I hadn't said anything."

"Yelling in my sleep.  What if your parents hear me?"

"You didn't yell except that one night."

"I woke up last night and you had your arm over me."

"You were tossing and stuff.  David told me that that's what he does.  So I
just turned over and put my arm over you.  You looked at me and then
settled down."

I sighed.

He said, "Sleep with me tonight."

I looked at him.  "You're sure you're not playing with my junk?"

He smiled.  "Maybe a little."

I laughed.

Aaron's Dad barbequed steaks.  We had corn on the cob and veggies.  We
talked about Aaron coming up to UX.  Freshman dorms open early for freshman
orientation.

We went to Aaron's bedroom early and hung around.  Aaron said, "Thank you
for everything."

"Thank you for the drive."

"I was thinking about how scared I was at Christmas."  He sighed.  "How
scared I was to do anything athletic.  How uncomfortable I felt about my
body.  You're a great friend."

"I want us to always be friends."  He nodded.  I smiled.  "Maybe you were
scared about doing stuff and uncomfortable about your body, but that's
changing, right?"

"Yes.  I know I'm still skinny."

"You're not skinny.  Stop saying that.  You're lean and lean is good.  If
you put on muscle, you'll have definition.  You've got definition already."
I stood up, pulled his tee shirt over his head and pushed him into the
bathroom.  We stood in front of the mirror.  I pointed out the lines on his
chest.  "This shit is hot.  Tell your trainer you want pecs.  Work on your
shoulders and arms."  I pulled his pants down.  He smiled at me.  "Flex," I
said.  "Tell him you want bigger legs muscles."

"In two months?"

"It's a start.  We'll work on all that when you get to UX."  Then I slipped
my hand into his briefs and said, "Unfortunately, this isn't a muscle."  I
thought he'd jump or squirm as I grabbed his junk, but he just looked at me
and smiled.  I felt his cock firming up.

He reached over and rubbed my junk.

I said, "With your parents awake?"

"They won't bother us."

"Let's do massages."

"Sounds great.  Then let's go for a swim and a Jacuzzi."

"Okay," I said and smiled.

"Then we'll jerk off again," he said and smiled.

I chuckled.  "Sure."

He lay on his bed and I straddled his butt.  I squirted baby oil on his
back and dug my fingers into his shoulders and worked my way to his butt.
Neither of us spoke.  I worked his gluts and pulled his ass cheeks apart.
My cock was hard.  I was sure his was also.  I ran my finger of his butt
hole and watched as it tightened.  He moaned and lifted his hips.  I knew
what he wanted.  Slowly, I slid a finger into him.  He sighed.  I moved my
finger around and with my other hand I played with his balls and reached
for his cock.  He was hard.

I massaged his legs and then rolled him over.  I worked his thighs and then
straddled his hips and worked his chest and abs.  I thought about how much
I enjoyed touching him and how attractive he was.  Odd, I thought, that he
couldn't see how attractive he was, how attractive his face and body were.
My cock was rock hard.  I wondered what it would be like to have sex with
him, to kiss him and then I felt a hollowness in my stomach.

A pool of pre cum sat on his stomach.

I scooted down a bit and took his cock in hand.  He sighed.  We made eye
contact.  He smiled.  I stroked his cock.

"I'm going to come right away," he said.

I smiled and nodded.  I tightened my grip on his cock and stroked.

He began to squirt.  I loved the thickness of his cock.  I felt his cock
head firm.  His abs tightened.  We made eye contact.  I watched as that
look of total pleasure came over his face, then his body quacked and then a
flood of cum shot from his cock.

I stroked his cock until he couldn't take it any longer and pulled my hand
away.

"Fuck, Josh.  You are better at stroking my cock than I am."

I laughed.

He went to the bathroom and cleaned up.

When he returned he sat on my butt and dug his fingers into my back
muscles.

"You are so good at this," I said.

"I've been watching videos," he said.

"Porn?"

"No.  Videos on how to give good massages."

I chuckled.  "You going to open a business."

"No.  Just want to give you good massages.  I mean you'll probably need
them when you start working out a lot harder at UX.  I figured I'd want to
know how to do it."

I felt my face tingle.  "Thank you," I said.

"I like doing this, so I figured I might as well be good at it."

"Good at it you are," I said in my Yoda voice.

He worked my gluts and seemed to find every knotted muscle.  I moaned and
groaned.  He played with my hole and then pressed a finger into me.  He
played with my balls and fingered my ass.  When I rolled over I watched him
looked over my body as he massaged me.  When he moved I noticed that he was
hard again.

He stroked my cock and played with my balls.  I watched him staring at my
cock.  I thought about pulling him down against me and kissing him, but I
didn't.  I lay still and let him bring me to orgasm.

Flying to UX I thought about Aaron a lot.  And the more I thought about him
the more anxious I became.  I thought about yelling in my sleep and felt
even more anxious.  When I arrived at UX I was surprised to see David
waiting at the drop off place.  "I know how to get to your apartment," I
said.

"Our apartment.  I just wanted to get out for a walk.  It's a nice night."

Silence.

"You seem quiet."

"I guess," I said.  I sighed.  "I know what you'll say so it's no use
talking about it."

"Really?  Is that what you want from me?"

"Fine but then don't say it."

"I don't even know what you're talking about.  Were you drinking on the
plane?"

"Fuck you."

Silence.

"I was thinking about Aaron.  I know he's attracted to me.  I know he likes
and loves me as a friend.  And I'm pretty sure if I said let's be
boyfriends, he'd say yes."

"But you're not attracted to him in that way."

Silence.

"I am, I guess."

"You guess?"

"I am.  I know I am, but,"

"Josh, if you don't feel right about it, then don't."

"It's just I know it will get fucked up and then what?"

"Have you thought about how it will get fucked up?"

I shook my head.  We walked.  "I'll do something to fuck it up.  I just
know I will."

"So you're protecting him from yourself?" he said sounding annoyed.  "You
know that is just bullshit and this self doubt, the way you diminish
yourself, it really bothers me."

"But I do stuff, I get angry, I get nasty sometimes when I'm angry."

"You are so full of shit.  But if you need an excuse not to take a risk,
then that's as good as any."

"I've never had a boyfriend.  You've had girlfriends.  You know what it's
like.  I don't and he doesn't.  It's like we'd be experimenting."

"Well, maybe you two need to be more mature.  I mean age wise.  Maybe you
two need to date other people.  Have experiences.  Maybe you both need to
fuck up three of four relationships and learn stuff."

Silence.

He said, "He's never going to fall out of love with you.  The only thing
that could fuck it up is that if you or he fall in love with someone else."

"What do you mean fuck it up?"

"Well, let's say you fall crazy in love with someone.  It might be too much
for him to take.  He might feel like he lost you and have to back off in
order to move on with his life."

I felt sick.  "Thanks."

"Well, think about it.  Isn't that also a possibility?"

"I hate you."

He laughed.

I hadn't had dinner and neither had he.  The taco place was on the way to
our apartment.  We both got chicken tacos and chips to share.  I said, "I
think we need to date other people."  I sighed.

"Well, then do that.  Either way there are no guarantees.  But I do agree
that it would be best if you both date other guys."

Walking back to the apartment, he said, "Are you horny?"

I chuckled.  "Of course."

"Are you?"

"Very.  I haven't come since you left."

"You haven't come for three days?  Why?"

"I thought I'd save up for you," he said and smiled.

I laughed.  "Shit, I just got wood."

We stood in the bedroom and undressed.  When he pulled down his boxer
briefs his erection popped out.  Naked, I got on my knees in front of him.
When I put my mouth on his cock, he sighed loudly.  I sucked his cock
taking it deep into my throat.  My nose pressed against his body.  I moved
back and forth until I began to gag.

"Fuck, Josh, that feels incredible."

His cock felt rock hard.  He was moaning.  He grabbed my head and thrust.
He called out, "I'm going to come."  He pulled almost all the way out of my
mouth, just leaving his cock head in my mouth, held my head steady and
came.

I felt shot after shot, powerful shots, exploding from his cock.  It
gathered on my tongue.  David comes many shots and each shot is large and
thick and when he hasn't come for a few days he comes even more.

When he was done, he pulled his cock from my mouth.  I looked up at him.
We made eye contact.  He smiled and said, "That was a big load."

Still on my knees, I looked up at him and opened my mouth.  He held my chin
and looked in.  "Fuck, Josh, you okay with all of that?"

I closed my mouth and swallowed twice.  "Yes,"

He smiled and sat on his bed.  "Stand up," he said.

I shook my head and walked over to him on my knees.  He was still hard.  I
spread his legs, moved in and put my mouth on his cock.  "Oh wow," he
sighed and lay back.

I sucked his cock, knowing that this is what he loved, almost more than
fucking pussy.  I worked his cock and was surprised when he quickly got
close again.  I stopped sucking his cock, licked the shaft of his dick, his
balls, and then pushed his legs up exposing his hole.

I pressed my tongue against it.  He reached for his cock, but I pushed his
hand away.  I licked his hole.  I pressed my tongue hard against his
sphincter.  He moaned.  I kissed his hole and bit the cheeks of his ass.  I
licked a finger and then pressed it into him.  With my finger in him, I
sucked his cock.  Again he was close.  He grabbed my head and thrust into
my mouth.  I felt his prostate firming up.  I moved my finger over it,
moved up and down on his cock and listened to him groan.

Again his cum exploded into my mouth.  We both moaned as he came.

I swallowed and then lay beside him.  He looked at me breathing hard.  "I
want you to fuck me," he said.

"Really?" I said, somewhat surprised.  Usually when he'd want me to fuck
him it was before he came and he wanted to jerk off while I fucked him.

"Very much so."

I lubed my cock and his hole.  He lay with his head on his pillow and
lifted his legs.  I moved between them, held my cock and slowly pressed it
into him.  He wrapped his legs around me and pulled me down on top of him.
We kissed.  Even though I had come twice the night before, I knew I wasn't
going to last long.  Being inside of him always felt like a complete body
turn on.  I tingled all over.  As I thrust I wondered if it would feel this
way with other men.  It didn't with Jamie, but with him I wore a condom.

I thrust.  We kissed.  He grunted with each push forward.  I moaned.  He
bit into my neck and then ran his tongue over my ear.  Chills ran over my
body straight through to my cock.  I began thrusting hard and fast.  He
held me.  I pressed into him hard and came.

I collapsed into his arms.

We soaped each other in the shower.  Afterward we climbed into bed.  Before
he fell asleep, I said, "The yelling in my sleep is still bothering me."

"Why?"

"It seems weird.  I mean I don't even remember it in the morning."

"It doesn't happen all that often and it doesn't bother me."

"I don't understand why it happens.  Has it always happened?"

He sighed.  "No."

"When did it start?"

"You don't remember what happened when you were about six, when we moved to
the house?"

"What happened?"

He rolled over onto his side and faced me.  "I had started swimming with
the junior Bolts.  I guess I was nine, so I had just started with them."

"But you always swam.  I mean you had been swimming before that."

"Yes.  We didn't have a pool at the old house.  Since we had a pool at the
new house, Mom wanted you and Sarah to learn to swim.  Dad decided he was
going to teach you."

"You taught me.  I was scared."

"That was after.  I was in the house, helping Mom with the dishes.  It was
after dinner.  Dad took you and Sarah out to the pool to teach you.  He
made you sit on the edge of the pool while he was teaching Sarah.  I guess
Sarah had to pee, so he picked her up and carried her into the house.  He
left you sitting on the edge.  I glanced out the window and then yelled to
Dad, "Where's Josh?"  He yelled back, "Sitting on the edge."

"I glanced out again and you weren't there.  I started to walk out into the
backyard thinking that you probably moved and were someplace where we
couldn't see you, but I had this bad feeling.  I moved quickly toward the
pool.  You were floating underwater with your hands out.  You weren't
moving."

"Did I die?"

"No.  I jumped in with all my clothes and shoes on.  The water was about
five feet deep.  I pulled you to the stairs and pulled you out.  Mom saw
all of this.  She started screaming.  I had seen a film about how they do
CPR, but I never practiced it.  I laid you down and started pressing on
your chest, but I think I must have been pressing on your stomach too.  I
don't know.  But then water came shooting out of your mouth and you started
choking.  In the video they turned the guy on his side.  So I did that.
You were choking and spitting out water.  Then you looked at me.  I was so
scared.  You reached up for me.  I bent down and you wrapped your arms
around my neck and started shaking.  You held me so tight.  I kept saying
that you were okay.

"Mom had run into the house and called 911."

"Dad came out with Sarah.  Mom was crying.  Dad ran over to us.  He tried
to pull you way from me, but you hung on so tightly and then you started
screaming.  I held onto you and kept saying that you were okay.  You'd
choke, cough, cry, scream and hold onto me.

"Finally, I went inside, still holding you.  Mom followed us.  Dad kept
saying that he told you not to move.  All my clothes were wet, but I sat on
the kitchen chair and held you.  Your arms and legs were wrapped around me.
You kept crying.  I stared crying.  Mom was crying.  Dad was angry."

"Wow," I said.

The EMT's came and looked you over.  They said you should go to the
hospital that you probably had water in your lungs and you could die.  You
wouldn't let go of me.  Finally, they said that Mom and I could ride in the
ambulance.  Dad followed with Sarah."

"I don't remember any of that."

"You were young and I guess you blocked it out.  They checked you out.
They said that you were lucky and that I must have gotten to you just in
time.  They made you stay in the hospital.  Mom and I stayed with you.  You
wouldn't let me leave."  He sighed.  I was still in my wet clothes.  The
people at the hospital gave me a set of scrubs.  They were pretty big on
me.  I slept with you in your bed and Mom slept in a chair.  You kept
waking up and grabbing onto me.  The next day you came home.

"That night you woke up screaming.  I ran into your room sat on your bed
and said that you were okay.  You were soaking wet with sweat.  Mom and Dad
came running in.  I told them I'd sleep with you.  You slept with me and
never let go of me.  I slept with you for about a week.  Then for about a
month, in the middle of the night, you'd get in bed with me.  Then you
seemed okay.  But then when shit happened at the house, you'd wake up
screaming.  I'd get in bed with you, you'd hang onto me and fall back
asleep."

"I guess that's why I was so afraid to learn to swim."

"Until I taught you."

"You know what's weird?"

"What?"

"I've always felt like you saved my life, but I thought it was because you
were always there to help me out.  You really did."

He put his arm over me.  "I've never minded it when you'd wake up yelling.
Don't let it bother you.  And I'm sure Aaron isn't bothered by it either."

Of course he fell asleep quickly.  I lay awake and tried to remember that
day, but I couldn't.  That seemed odd to me.  If it was so scary, I should
be able to remember it, I thought.  I looked over at David and tears filled
my eyes thinking again how lucky I was to have him for a brother.

I kept glancing at the clock.  The last time I looked it was 12:42.

I woke fully erect, my cock in David's mouth.  I glanced at the clock.
3.31.  I put my hand on his head.  "I'm going to have to wake you up doing
that," I said.

"I wish you would," he said and then went back to sucking my dick.

I lay still, stroking his head as he gave me head.  He licked, sucked, and
played with my balls.  He got up, grabbed the lube and wet his hand.  While
sucking my cock, he wet my hole with lube and then slid two fingers into
me.  I sighed loudly.  "You're so tight," he said.

"It's been a while."

When I got close, he moved his fingers over my prostate and ran his tongue
round the head of my cock.  I relaxed and let my climax take over my body.
My legs shook.  My hips thrust and my abs tightened.  Then my orgasm hit.
I moaned.  He moaned.  I felt him swallowing.

He lay beside me.  We kissed.  I rolled over, lying on my stomach and said,
"Fuck me."

He got on top of me and slowly pressed deep into me.  He didn't move.  He
grabbed a handful of my hair and turned my face toward him.  He put his
mouth on mine.  Our tongues met.  He sighed.  I sighed.  He licked my neck
and ear.  I moaned, "Fuck me."

He held me by the hair, bit into my shoulder and began thrusting.  With
each forward deep move, I grunted and he moaned.  The weight of his body on
me, his cock moving over my sphincter and against my prostate, his licking
and biting my neck and shoulder sent chills thought my body.  "Don't come
right away," I begged.

He bit down on my shoulder, pulled almost all the way out of me and then
went in deep.  "Oh fuck, David," I said, my body shaking under his weight.
He fucked me long and hard.  Three times, he pounded my ass hard and then
stopped and lay still on top of me.  Each time we kissed.  Then it was back
to fucking me, our sweaty bodies making the sound of flesh slamming against
flesh.

The fourth time he got close, he didn't stop.  He held my hair so tightly
it almost hurt, but didn't.  It just added to the sensations pulsing
through my body.  When he came, he came hard and pressed deep into me.  I
listened to him breathing hard and fast.  He kissed my neck, my shoulder
and then turned my face toward him.  We kissed.

He rolled me over and lay on top of me.  I held him, stroking his head.

"You said I saved your life," he said.

"You did."

"I know what you're going to do with this."

"What's that?"

"I did something for you.  I do so much for you.  What have you ever done
for me?  You're lucky that I'm your brother.  All that stuff."

I felt my face tingle.  "Well, isn't that true?"

"Oh Josh."  He lifted his head and looked at me.  "Please understand that I
feel lucky to have you as a brother.  I can't image what my life would have
been like if you had drowned.  Yeah, I pulled you out of the pool, but I
feel lucky, like some angel said to me, look for Josh.  So don't go into
that place that diminishes yourself.  I get that I'm very important to you.
That you value me.  I don't understand why you don't see that you're just
as important to me."

My eyes filled with tears.  "I just don't get it."

"Fine, you don't get it.  But believe it."

We lay holding each other and of course he fell asleep.  I could feel his
load moving through my ass.  I was either going to have to get him off of
me and get up or sleep in a wet spot.  I'll wash the sheets tomorrow, I
thought as I held him and listened to him sleep.  Finally, I fell asleep.

I started my job as a lifeguard and I taught little kids how to swim.  I
was surprised at how good I was at it and how much I enjoyed it.  I'd look
into their eyes and see their fear and doubt and I knew what to do.  I'd
let them hang on to me and slowly walk then across the pool, assuring them
that I wouldn't let go of them.  I'd wet their face and blow bubbles.

David told me that coach Michaels wanted to see me.  He was going to be the
coach of the freshman.

"I'm glad you're going to be here this summer," he said as I sat down in
his office.

"Me, too."

"Our season starts at the beginning of Oct.  Most of the new guys will be
starting their workouts when they arrive in September.  But this gives us a
chance to start you early."

"Okay, sure.  What do you want me to do?"

"You have a job?"  I nodded.  "Okay, so I want you here at 7 am five days a
week.  I'd like to see you in the pool for two hours.  Does that work with
your work schedule."

Fuck, 7 am, I thought.  Back to morning swims.  "Yes, it does."

"Good.  Then can you be here at 4 pm on Monday, Wednesday and Friday?"

"Yeah."

"You'll swim for an hour and then we'll meet in the weight room.  I'm
starting you off with an average workout schedule.  By September you'll be
swimming with the team."

"Okay."

"I'll be here for all your workouts so I'll tell you what I want you to do
each day.  There are a couple of other guys who will be swimming with you,
but they were freshman last year.  You're brother knows what to do so he
can come in when he has time, but I want to work with you personally."

"Sounds good.  Thank you."

He stared at me.  "I had or have concerns."

I felt anxious.  "When there's been brothers on the same team, often there
is this dynamic.  Especially when the brothers are close, like you and
David."

"What dynamic?"

"The younger brother holds back, you know, not wanting to out compete his
older brother.  I don't expect you to be at the top of your game your
freshman year, but I'm going to he pushing you hard.  I think, your coaches
at your high school and your coach on the Bolts thought, you could be
better than your brother."

I felt my face burning hot and sadness wash over me.  I nodded.

"I'm not going to let you slid.  When he's a senior you'll be a sophomore
and I'll be expecting a lot from you."  I nodded.  "You've got good form,
you're fast and you're strong.  I'm going to want to see you perform at the
level I think you can."

"Yes sir."

"Okay, Josh.  You've got your work cut out for you, but you've got me to
get you where I think you can go.  You just need to do the work."

"I want to sir."

"Good.  I'll see you Monday at seven, in the pool."

I left the meeting feeling anxious, sad, overwhelmed, full of doubt and
wondering why everyone thought I could be better than David and if I was
really holding back.

The thought of doing better than David, especially at swimming, made me
sad.

Thank you for reading along.

JoshRJosh@yahoo.com