Date: Wed, 27 Jul 2005 03:33:57 -0500
From: Dylan <dylan49@gmail.com>
Subject: Dylan And Jonny Part 2 Chapter 5 (GMale)

CHAPTER FIVE - WORRIES

	I woke up to someone tapping me on my shoulder, when I looked
behind me, it was Leon that was standing behind me. "Hey, how did you end
up like this? I thought you were IN bed with Jonny." He
chuckled. "um..yeah" I said. Leon seemed to frown a little at the tone of
my voice. "Are you okay?" He asked. "I'm... fine" I lied. I couldnt tell
him what I had just done to Jonny. It ate at me from the inside out, but
for the moment I just wanted some time with Leon.
	Leon spent the day with me, occasionally asking me what was
wrong. I suppose I didn't know but my brow was always furrowed, even though
I was "enjoying" myself with Leon, my mind always jumped to my little
brother just laying there on the bed. I sat and closed my eyes, imagining
how I would have felt if I were treated like that. Before long, I was being
shaken awake again.  "Dylan, you've gotta stop drifting off to sleep" Leon
chuckled, gently brushing my hair with his hands. "You like that?" I asked
him, noticing the small smile that spread across his face.  "You've got
some silky hair mister." He said, gently kissing my forehead. "Well, at
least you can wake up, Matt's been trying to wake Jonny up for a while, but
no luck" he finished. "What!?"  I jumped off the couch. The window in front
of me was pitch black, the night was for once, something I feared. 'Just
how powerful was that drug?' I wondered. Slowly I walked into Jonny's room,
hoping that Jonny would greet me as soon as the door was open. I turned the
knob, gently pushing the door, hearing the squeak of the hinges. There I
stood, waiting to hear my twin's voice, but nothing sounded out. I prayed,
watching the door as it stopped before being fully pushed back on it's
hinges. My mind somehow hoped that if I pressed the door against the wall,
Jonny would wake up. My hand quivered as my finger pushed the door, my ears
sharpened as soon as I heard the "Clunk" of the door against the
wall. Instead of hearing my Jonny's melodic voice, I heard Matt's sad
plea. "When are you gonna wake up Jonny?" He asked my brother's seemingly
lifeless body. Matt got up and shook Jonny a little, provoking nothing but
a small moan and a furrowed brow. "He's been asleep for too long, its not
natural!" Matt panicked. It was then, in that moment, I saw that gleam in
his eyes, one of deep worry, one of deep...love. A special Love, for my
brother. Part of me fought to keep my brother, the other wanted me to let
go.  "Dylan, what could have made him sleep so long?" Matt asked, hopeful
that I would have the answers he seeked. In truth, I suppose I did,
but.. for some reason, my mouth immediately reacted, "I dont know", the
words sounded awkward comming out of my mouth.
	It was well over two hours, before my fear got the worse of
me. "Maybe we should take him to the hospital" I said, suddenly standing
from my chair in Jonny's room. Matt nodded and went to Jonny's bed. He
placed his hands gently on the bed and slid them under my still unconscious
brother and lifted. Much to my surprise, Matt seemed to be able to life
Jonny without too much strain or effort. Despite his slim frame, he was
actually quite strong. I stood, still dumbstruck at his strength. "Jonny,
wake up now, you've got to... if not for me... then at least for him..." I
whispered into the empty room.
	For an eternity, the doctors poked and prodded at my baby brother
on their table. "I don't understand, this boy is very much alive and well,
but for some reason he wont wake up or respond to stimulus" The doctor said
to his nurse, I watched in horror as he treated Jonny's body as a doll,
stripping off Jonny's shirt. It was then that I saw Jonny's wrists, they
were crimson red with lines perpendicular to his arm. "He's been cutting"
The doctor said.
	After the doctor finished checking out Jonny's cuts he pulled me
out into the hallway.  "You're brother has apparently lost a little bit of
blood, but we suspect that he may be under the effects of a sleeping
drug. We're running a tox screen and we'll inform you of the results."  He
walked off without even waiting for me to say anything. I walked back into
the room where a still shirtless Jonny lay on the examination table. "They
just came in and took a blood sample" Matt said. He looked.... tired... and
worried, and I knew, it was my fault, "Why don't you go to the hospital
cafeteria and get us something to eat." I asked. "I guess" Matt reluctantly
left the room. I walked around the room, looking at all the posters on the
wall. I kept hearing grunting sounds whenever I passed the bathroom. Slowly
I turned the knob, peeking in. Leon was there, his pants at his ankles, his
hard tool out with one hand clasped around it. I could hear his mumbling
between grunts, "Dylan, why dont you..unh.. notice me more? I'm
right..unh..  here but all you think about is some other..unh.. guy." I
watched his body writh on it's own stimulant. He jerked his hands up and
down his member before he stood up,and laid in the tub.  "Dylan..." He
moaned. I watched him take one hand and, although I couldn't see it I knew
he was fingering himself. "Dyl..." he moaned. I heard the door to the room
open and I quickly stood up. "H-hey" I stuttered. "Hey! Sorry, I was
talking to the doctor out in the hall. They say that the sleeping drug he
took, had a stronger effect beacause Jonny's body was already weak from
his... his..." Matt looked pained, "cutting." He finally said. Leon came
out of the restaurant and as he did, his smile of what I assumed as relief
and pleasure, soon turned to one of awkward yearning when he looked at
me. The nurse came in and gave Jonny a shot of some clear liquid that she
said would help to counteract the drug.
	After half an hour, Jonny started to wake up. "Wha...what happened?
Why am I here?" he asked. "Oh Jonny... thank god you're okay." Matt sighed,
hugging him. "Oh.." Jonny moaned, rubbing his head. "I'll go try to find
the doctor" Matt said, running out of the room. "Jonny..  how long have you
been at it?" I asked, trying hard to fight the small tears that formed.
"Wh..what?" Jonny asked. "This! How long have you been at this?" I grabbed
his arm and rolled up his sleeves, revealing the cut marks. "Oh..." Jonny
looked ashamed. "Why?" I asked him...  suddenly realizing how shaky my
voice had become. "Because...." Jonny took a deep breath.  "Because.. it
hurt..it hurt being the target of everyone... It hurt being the one who was
always raped... whipped...it all just hurt. I feel like... everyone just
treats me as this... sex slave that everyone can use. It hurt so
much... that... I thought I was dead...like there was nothing that could
even be considered by me as pain. It felt so...good the first time, that
first cut, when I felt something... I felt... alive, but the second
time... I could watch the blood from the cut, and I felt... nothing. How do
you know you're still alive when you cant feel anything?" Jonny started to
sob. "How do you know you're still... human, when you cant feel anything
except a pain thats been hurting you so much.. you dont even know it's
there anymore?"  He started crying. "Jonny... I..." I started, he cried
harder. "I'm so sorry Dylan... I really am... I didnt mean to ..." He
sighed. "It's..okay... Jonny... little brother" I said slowly, sitting on
the bed and hugging him. "You know you're alive... when there are people
who love you, people who love you like .....me." I said, rocking back and
forth, soothing my baby brother in my arms. "People who love me.. like
you..." Jonny mumbled, closing his eyes and resting himself against my
chest. It was then that I raised my head and I saw Matt standing there with
tears in his eyes. "Like me too..." he mouthed before walking over and
gently brushing Jonny's cheek with the back of his hand. "Mmmh..." Jonny
moaned weakly, not opening his eyes. I felt Jonny relax against my chest
and Matt wiped away the tears in his eyes before telling me that the doctor
was on his way. That being said,he turned his attention to my brother and
he brushed the hair on Jonny's forhead to the side and gave him a gentle
kiss, whispering "I love you too"

DYLAN:
	It's incredible what the human being is capable of, living,
walking, breathing, and even the ablity to harm creatures, even
themselves. It is always when people realize they are the ones who are in
charge of their bodies, that they are the gods of their own
destiny. However, they may or may not choose to live afterwards. The reason
may not always be pain, but what's the reason for it all? No one really
knows, from pain, to love. Maybe thats not the right question, Maybe it's
"Why do we live?" I live for love, for life, and for all the surprises they
bring, Why do you live?

AUTHOR'S NOTE HEY EVERYONE! Sorry I havent written anything in so long,
I've been on vacation. How do you all like me lil Dylan's notes. It's
suppose to be a "Reflective" note, If ya like it tell me, if ya
dont.... tell me too. Just test-driving the idea.

More to come?

I will try to write a new chapter as soon as possible. Be sure to check!

Comments and Suggestions arent required but always appreciated!

Please feel free to e-mail me at

Dylan49@gmail.com

I do write back!

Thanks
~Dylan