Date: Thu, 16 Nov 2000 11:20:53 EST
From: Raymond Blake <androgynal@hotmail.com>
Subject: It's a family affair - G/M A/Y Y/Y

This is a work of fiction involving youth/youth and adult/youth sexual
relationship. If eroctic material of this nature is offensive to you, please
do not read any further.

Copyright notice:

It's a family affair. Written by Tom Cup is copyrighted by the Paratwa
Partnership, a Colorado Corporation.  The author reserves a rights.

____________________

It's a family affair.

Billy walked into the expensive Board Street Penthouse that he shared with
his younger brother Tim.  He stopped at the mirror in the entry and set down
his keys on the table there.  He glanced at himself in the mirror.  For 40,
he thought to himself, not bad.  He was clean shaven with sparkling blues,
prehaps they showed his weariness most; his sandy brown hair was well
trimmed and cut and the workouts at the gym three times a week with his
brother had kept him as fit as any 20 year old.

"Is that you?" he heard Tim call from the kitchen.  Something was cooking
and it sure smelled  good.  "Who else would it be?" Billy teased and heard
the familiar sound of ice cubes being dropped in a tumbler and trickle of
Gentleman Jack being added.

Tim came out of the kitchen holding the glass. "Hard day?" he asked.  Billy
wondered if it was something in his voice that clued his brother in or if
they really were so close that without saying a word Tim could judge his
mood.  There was no use lying.  Tim would know that immediately. "Yeah," he
admitted, "Lost the Martin account."  He took the glass that Tim held out to
him as he slid into his favorite chair.  Tim came and sat next to him.  "How
much money do we have between us?" he asked.  Billy laughed and took a sip
from the glass; and passing it to Tim said, "I really don't know."  Tim took
a sip from the glass and asked, "5 million? 10 million? 20 million? What?"
Billy sighed.  He knew where this was going.  They had been having this
conversation for years; everytime Billy got into one of his 'moods'.
"Something like that," he admitted. His brother passed the glass back to him
and said, "If working makes you feel this way Billy, you know you don't have
to do it anymore."  Billy knew.  He knew also that Tim knew what he would
say next.  This conversation had become something of a ritual between them.
"I know, I know, Tim. I just want to make sure that what Da did never dies."

Billy was 12 and Tim was 10 when they learned the word that would change
their lives forever. Cancer: and their mother had it.  Da was their mother's
second husband and the only father that either of the boys really knew.

"What's happening?" Tim asked, trying to see over or around his older
brother. "Shhhh!" Billy ordered, "I can't hear a thing with you yakking like
that!"  Billy didn't really need to hear much to know it was bad.  Mom was
knealing in front of Da who had his head bent with the palms of his hands
covering his face: he was crying.  Billy guided the door closed, grabbed
Tim's hand and led him back to their room.

"What's happening Billy", Tim asked again.  "Awww, it's nothing," Billy
tried to lie. Tim looked up from his bed with tears in his eyes and said,
"Everyone thinks I'm sooooo stupid.  Well I'm not stupid Billy. I'm not!  I
know mom's real sick. I just want to know if she's gonna die."  He started
to cry.  Billy went and sat on his younger brothers bed. "Don't cry Timmy,"
he whispered putting an arm around him, "I don't think you're stupid,
honest.  I just don't know what's going to happen but no matter what you'll
always have me."  Tim led his head on his big brother's shoulders.  "Billy?"
he asked, "Can I sleep with you tonight.  I don't want to be alone." Billy
hugged him and answered, "Sure."

  The boys stripped down to their briefs.  Niether of them like wearing much
clothing to bed; mainly because they had so few clothes for the early years
of their life.  Their bioloical father had left them and their mother when
Billy was 4 and Timmy was 2.  Billy remembered the most about him and most
of it wasn't good.  Mostly he remembered the fights and being afraid.

All that changed when his mother met Da as they would all begin to call him.
  It was 2 year old Timmy that started the trend even before he became
officially their stepfather.  Both boys, though, loved him from the
beginning.  Billy could  still remember the warm feeling he got in his groin
when Da would carry him with his hand firmly supporting his buttocks.  Later
he would confess that that was the first sign of his growing awareness of
his own homosexuality.

Billy climbed in bed first and held the sheets up for his brother to join
him.  Timmy slid into bed with his brother and immediately wrapped his arms
around him and put his head on his chest.  Billy laid back and hugged his
brother and began to gently stroke his back.  There was no sexual intent in
this; he simply wanted to comfort him but the feel of his brother's near
naked body caused his cock to stir for it's nightly visit.

Most nights it was like a ritual for Billy to quietly jerk off in bed while
thinking of boys he'd seen at school or some stranger he had seen on the
street.  He did it quietly as not to draw the attention of his younger
brother and now he shifted uncomfortablly in his bed trying to prevent Timmy
from noticing his hard on.

Timmy's hand rested on Billy's stomach and the warmth, and softness, of it
was driving Billy crazy. Timmy took a deep breath and Billy again tried to
adjust himself to curtail the sensations growing in his groin.  But the
movement caused Timmy's hand to slip down to just above the elastic of
Billy's briefs.  Billy frozed and hoped that Timmy was asleep or won't
notice the strain that his cock was placing on the elastic.  "Billy?" Timmy
said.  Oh, God! Billy thought. "Yeah?" he answered.  "Are you sad?" Timmy
asked.  Billy was relieved by the question; it would keep both of their
minds off of his cock. "Yeah, a little," he answered honestly. "Me too,"
said Timmy, "Can I tell you a secret?"  "Sure," Billy answered.  "When I am
sad," Timmy continued, "I play with myself and it makes me feel better."
Alarms went off in Billy's mind.  He had never considered the possibility
that his younger brother knew about masterbation and the thought of it
caused Billy's cock to jump wildly.  "We could make eachother feel better
right now...if you want," Timmy announced and slid his hand onto his brother
brief covered cock.

"I don't know Timmy," Billy heard himself say but his cock was answering
yes, yes as Timmy gently rubbed his fingers over the material restraining
Billy's cock.  "Please?" whispered Timmy, "I won't tell." and he slid his
hand inside of Billy's briefs and took his cock into his palm.

There was no denying that it felt good and that he didn't want it to stop.
"Are you sure, Timmy," he asked being choked by the pleasure of Timmy softly
stoking him beneath the sheets. "Yes," Timmy answered with the voice of an
angel, "Please."  Billy didn't answer this time. He simply lifted his hips
and removed his underware to give Timmy easier access to his cock.  He also
helped Timmy remove his briefs and gazed at how beautiful his brother's hard
cock looked. Both boys laid on bed and facing eachother and began stroking
the other's cock.  "God Timmy," Billy said, "That feel's really good."
Billy could feel the minor jerks his cock was making and knew that his cock
was leaking  precum. He concentrated on massaging his brother's cock but
that was as exciting as the feeling of Timmy's hand tugging on his member.
"mmmmmmm," Timmy moaned.  Billy looked at his brother's face.  So beautiful
he thought to himself and before he could think it Timmy looked him in the
eyes and said, "I love you, Billy."

Billy was lost in the moment now and released his brother's cock and rolled
over on top of him.  He pressed his cock against his brother's and kissed
him.  Timmy moaned and put his arms around him and a slow dance began
between them.  Their mouth locked together and their tongues explored
eachothers mouths; their hips ground their cocks against one another and
their hands slid over eachothers bodies. "I love you, too," Billy managed at
last and Timmy pushed him over onto his back and slid down to welcome his
brother's cock into his mouth.

"Oh god, Timmy," Billy exclaimed as Timmy busied himself softly licking and
sucking his older brother's cock. "God Timmy," he repeated. The warmth,
softness and excitement was overtaking him.  His cock was twitching for
release and it was coming.  He pumped his hips into Timmy's sweet, welcoming
mouth and moaned aloud.  Timmy made love to his brother's cock, kissing it,
sucking it, licking it until it became a ridgit monument to ecstasy and
errupted into his mouth.

Billy was still panting  when he felt his brother's hand on his chest. "You
alright?" Timmy asked.  All right? All right!? Billy thought. "Where did you
learn to do that?"  Billy asked.  Timmy just shrugged his shoulders and
answered, "Guess it just come natural."  Billy kissed him and could taste
his own cum mingled with the flavors of his brother.  He gently positioned
him on his back and went down to return the favor he'd just received.  He
licked the head of Timmy's cock playing with it with the tip of his tongue.
Timmy's body shuddered.  He licked from the base of his brother's cock to
the tip and back down again; finishing by taking his ball into his mouth.
"mmmmmm," Timmy moaned, "That feels really good."  He licked the tight skin
between Timmy's balls and ass which had Timmy thrash his head from left to
right on the bed all the while whispering, "Oh Billy, please don't stop.
Please!"  Billy lifted Timmy's legs and began tonguing around his ass.  He
licked Timmy's crack with long, slow and tender passes. Timmy was moaning
continuously now and the sounds coming from him excited Billy all the more.
He took his hands and spread Timmy's ass cheeks and licked the rosey ring he
found there.  "Oh Billy, Oh Billy,"  was all that Timmy could manage before
another wave of pleasure would wash across his body. Billy pressed his
tongue at the entrance of Timmy's asshole and felt it give.  Soon he was
sliding his tongue in and out of Timmy's rose hole.  "I can't take it,"
Timmy announced, "Please suck me Billy. Please."  Billy let Timmy's legs
drop and captured Timmy's cock with his mouth.  Timmy began pumping wildly.
Billy's head bobbed up and down with his brother's thrust.  Finally, Timmy
thrusted upward and Billy suck in the pre-adolescent dew of Timmy's orgasm.

They laid together in the darkness holding eachother.  "I feel better now,"
Timmy said breaking the silence, "Thank you, Billy."  Billy didn't answer
right away.  His mind was on something that Timmy had said earlier.
"Timmy?" he finally said, "What did you mean when you said that it just
comes natural?" He could feel Timmy repositioning himself  to turn towards
him.  "I don't know," Timmy started, "I mean, I think about it alot."
Billy's heart was pounding in his chest, "What? What do you mean?  What do
you think about?"  Timmy turned and layed on his back.  Billy could hear him
exhale.  "Oh, nothing," he said, "Just forget about it."  But Billy couldn't
forget about it and the silence in the room was a deafening roar.  Finally
Billy said, "Timmy?"  "Yeah," Timmy responded.  "I want to tell you
something but please don't be mad, ok?"  Timmy again turned toward his older
brother. "Ok," he said.  Billy took a deep breath and still the words were a
whisper when they slipped past his lips, "I'm gay." and he began to cry.

Timmy reached out and hugged his older brother.  "I'm sorry, I'm sorry,"
Billy kept repeating between sobs, "I'm sorry."  Timmy held him in his arms
and tried to kiss the tears away, "It's ok, Billy," he said, "Please don't
cry. Please don't cry."  "What am I going to do?" Billy asked, "What am I
going to do?"  He sobbed and Timmy held him.  "Billy?" Timmy said at last,
"I listen to you when you play with your thing at night."  Billy stopped
crying and sat up in the bed.  "What!?" he said.  "Don't be mad," Timmy
replied, "I can't wait sometimes.  You wait so long.  Then I play with mine
and pretend I am with you like we were tonight."  There was a long silence.
"I'm gay too," he said softly.

Billy was out of bed first. "Wake up," he order, "I smell cinnamon rolls!"
They both quickly got dressed and bounded to the kitchen.  "Well," their
mother chimed, "Look Da, the dead have arisen!"  Da laughed and said, "Good
morning boys."  "Good morning," both boys said at once and took turns
hugging their mother and Da.

They all sat down to breakfast together.  Billy's mind was racing; trying to
put together everything that was going on in their lives:  he was gay; his
brother was gay; they had had sex just last night and their mother was
dying.  "What's the matter with you," his mother asked and Da stopped
teasing and tickling Timmy so that they could all hear.  "Oh, nothing I just
have a lot on my mind,"  Billy said.  "He's thinking about sex!"  Timmy
burst out with a laugh.  Billy looked at him as if he could kill him.  "Oh,"
said his mother, "Da, I think it's time to have that talk with him."  And
Timmy laughed till he cried.

"The talk" as it is called was "ok" as far as Timmy and Billy were
concerned.  "But he left out the good parts,"  Timmy told his brother later,
"You know, the part about how two guys can love eachother too."  Billy
wasn't mad at him anymore.  In fact, he now thought it was really smart of
him to tell his parents that he was thinking about sex.  "It'll keep them
out of our hair about it now,"  Timmy said, "Now that we have had 'the
talk,' and he howl with laughter and rolled around on the floor.  And Billy
had to laugh with him.

There were good days and there were bad days.  This wasn't a good day.
Billy and Timmy listened in horror as their mother threw up over and over
again into a thrash can.  She was crying, "God make it stop!"  Billy pull
Timmy away from the door and back into their room.  Tears were running down
Timmy's face as he sat silently on his bed. "It's going to be all right,"
Billy tried to cheer him up but the icy glare that Timmy shot at him let him
know now was not the time for fantasy.  "Ok, I'm sorry," Billy said, "I keep
forgetting you're a big boy now."  Timmy glared at him again, "Is that
supposed to be fun?" he asked. Billy shrugged his shoulders and walked over
and sat on the bed with his younger brother.  He put his arm around him and
kissed his head.  Timmy leaned his head on Billy's shoulder. "I'm just
trying to cheer you up," Billy said.  Timmy looked at him; kissed him on the
lips and said, "This cheers me up." and they curled up together and fell
asleep.

Billy was awakened in the middle of the night by the warmth of his brother's
penis pressing against his side.  Timmy was sleeping peacefully with his arm
around him.  Billy adjusted himself so he was facing Timmy.  There hard
cocks touched and Timmy moaned and opened his eyes.  "Hi," Billy said.
"Hi," responded Timmy, "What time is it?"  Billy shrugged and said, "Time to
make eachother feel better." He moved closer to his brother and kissed him.
Timmy rolled over on his back accepting his brother's advances. Billy slid
his hands beneath the sheets and came up with his underware and repeated the
move to come up with Timmy's.  Timmy was moaning now as Billy laid on top of
him.  "Timmy?" Billy said, "Timmy, can we try something different tonight."
"Anything," was Timmy's only reply.  Billy hopped out of bed and started
searching in his drawer underneath his clothes.  He found the jar of
vaseline he had hidden there and returned to bed.  "You want to fuck me,
huh?" Timmy stated.  Billy nodded and began applying the lube to his cock.
Timmy lifted his ass off the bed so his brother could have better access to
his hole.  "Shit," he complained as Billy applied the first coat to his ass,
"It's cold!"  Billy worked the oily sustance over Timmy's crack and slid a
finger in his ass.  "mmmmmm...." Timmy moaned.  He began sliding his finger
in and out of his brother's ass.  Timmy closed his eyes and lifted his his
to meet his brother's finger.  Billy then applied the vaseline to two of his
fingers and gently slid them into Timmy.  He pumped Timmy's ass with his
fingers feeling it getting more and more relax as he did.  He bent down and
began sucking on Timmy's cock.  "Oh Gawwwd,"  Timmy exclaimed, "You keep
that up and I'm gonna shoot all in your mouth."  Billy gave his brother a
few more moments of fingering and suck; and then released Timmy's cock and
let his fingers slide out of his ass.  "Ready?" Billy asked.  "Give it to me
big boy," Timmy replied and lifted his knees to his chest.  Billy put the
head of his cock at Timmy's asshole.  He watched his brother's face as it
began to slide in.   When Timmy grimmaced; he would stop and wait for him to
get use to the feel of his cock.  Inch by inch he lowered his cock into his
brother's ass until he could go no further. "I'm in," he said at last and
Timmy took a deep breath and exhaled.  He put his arms around his brother's
neck  and said, "I'm all yours."

Billy pulled out slightly, testing the waters, then slid back in; his
brother inhaled and exhaled to his rythum.  Slowly he bagan to rock back and
forth grinding his cock into Timmy's ass.  Timmy's eyes were closed but he
was moaning to the movements in his brother's dance.  Timmy ran his  hands
up and down his brother's backside: the back of his head; his shoulders; his
back and ; his ass.  The feel of Timmy's hands on his ass made Billy grind
Timmy's ass at a faster pace. Timmy held his ass tight pulling his cock
deeper. The warm softness of  Timmy's hands passed through Billy's jirating
cheeks and into his balls where it melded with the heat of his already red
hot member. Timmy's ass clenched onto Billy's cock.  Billy looked down at
his brother.  He was thrashing his head from left to right.  His body was in
spasm.  His cock was jerking and Billy could see the clear substance jumping
  from his brother's penis.  His brother's spasms mixed with his own.  His
body rocked and jerked.  His balls pushed and his cock contracted.  He felt
the blood rush to his cheeks.  He was cumming.

There were good days and there were bad days.  It had been two years since
they had learned of their mom's cancer. There had been spinal taps and kimo;
surgery and bone marrow transplants. It had started out a good day.  Billy
watched his mom start to clear the dinner table.  "I'll do that mom," he
offered.  She wouldn't hear of it of course.  She had been bedridden for
most of the  pass 9 months and it was the first time she felt well enough to
get out of bed.  She wanted to feel useful again; needed again.

Da smiled at the boys; they become even closer over those two years, "Go
on," he said, "I'll help mom."  She wouldn't hear of it of course and Da was
sent to relax in his bedroom and the boys to theirs.

It was Billy who found her.  Timmy and he had made love that night and
fallen to sleep together.  He had awaken in the middle of the night and gone
to the kitchen for a glass of water.  There she was lying in the middle of
the kitchen floor; the contents of her bladder pooled beneath her.  His
wails had awaken the others.  Timmy and he wept openly until they saw Da.
His mouth was openned wide as if he were screaming but there was no sound.
His chest heaved back and forth and his eyes were rolled up into his head.
Tears streamed down his face and he dropped to his knees. His face was
turning blue. "Da!," Timmy screamed. Da's head ifted to the ceiling and
finally the boys heard him take a deep breath.  The sound that exited his
throat next frighten the boys worst than the body of their dead mother
laying in front of them.  There was pain in the scream that Da let fly from
his lips that day; there was loss, sadness, bitterness and sorrow.  Later
Tim and Billy would call it 'the cry of loss love' and it broke their
hearts.

Da didn't sleep much after his beloved wife died. He was on extended leave
at work and Billy was extremely worried about him.  Timmy barely left
Billy's side these days but once Timmy fell asleep Billy would walk up
stairs. Night after night he would pull Da from the chair he sat in. "Come
on Da," he would say, "It's time for bed."  "Already?" Da would say, "Where
has the time gone, where has the time gone?"  Billy would get Da to bed and
slip back to his own before he was missed by Timmy.

Timmy and Billy made most of the meals.  Sometimes people dropped by to
check on them but for the most part it was the boys and Da.  After two
months, Da mananged to go back to work but when he got home he would only
sit in his chair and stare into the kitchen as if his wife was still there.

It was after dinner and the kitchen had been cleaned. "We're going to bed
now, Da," Timmy said. Da started to cry, "I'm no good to you boys, am I."
Billy turned to Timmy and said, "Go on. I'll be down in a while. Go on."
Billy knelt down between Da's legs and hugged his waist.  "We need you Da,"
he whispered.  Da rubbed his hand through Billy's hair.  Billy stood up and
repeated the line he had used so much over the last two months, "Come on Da.
It's time for bed."  Da smiled and without a word got up and went to his
room.

Billy never could remember why he followed Da up the stairs that night or
what he was thinking.  May be it was because he had been so use to walking
Da to his room that he hadn't noticed the difference.  He had stood in the
doorway and watched Da undress and get in bed.  He watched as he curled up,
hugging himself and gently began to cry.  Billy didn't remember how long he
stood there or when he slipped out of his clothes.  He slid into bed with Da
that night and Da rolled over and Billy held him.  Stroking his back and
whispering, "It'll be all right Da, it'll be all right."  Billy wasn't sure
if Da realized that he was nude or even cared. But they curled up together
and Da slept.

Timmy wasn't mad when Billy finally showed up in the room they shared.  He
was concerned.  "Is Da alright?" he asked as he put his arms around his
weary brother. "I think so," Billy answered.  Timmy stroked his brother's
back and Billy fell fast asleep.

Things changed slow but Da was better at work and for most of the day.  At
night Billy would "tuck" him in so he could sleep.  They got undressed
together now and slid in bed and Billy would hold him until he fell asleep.

Timmy had accepted the new arrangement and he and Billy made love late at
night after Da was asleep or early in the mornings before getting up.  But
this day was a bit different. "I need you," he was pleading with Billy.
"Wait till tonight," Billy insisted.  Timmy had stripped right then and
there; looking over his shoulder said, "Come on Billy.  I'm sooo horny."

Billy had relented of course and they had started exploring eachother
knowing that Da could be home at any moment.  They had heard the door open
and Da calling for them.  Billy was mad because his hard on never left him
through out dinner.  Somehow he had to take care of Da as quickly as
possible and get back to Timmy; to finish what they started. Timmy
volunteered to do the kitchen that night and pushed Billy toward the living
room where Da was now sitting. "Hurry," Timmy whispered, "I'll be down
stairs waiting."

Billy grabbed Da's hand, "Come on Da. It's time for bed."  Da rose and
started up the stairs.  Billy glanced back at the kitchen and saw Timmy
hurriedly loading the dishwasher.  His cock had descended to a semi hard
form by the time he and Da undressed.  He kept his back to Da for the first
time and slid in between the sheets quickly with his back to him.  Da got in
bed and curled up with him and sighed deeply. The feel of Da's touch caused
Billy's cock to once again spring to life.  All he could think was, 'please
fall asleep quickly so I can get to Timmy.'  But Da couldn't seem to get
comfortable so finally Billy turned toward him and began rubbing his
shoulders.  Da sighed and closed his eyes.  Billy rubbed his chest; running
his smooth, warm, hands in circles.  He layed his head on Da's chest and Da
took a long deep breath.  Billy reached over to hug him and his elbow
brushed Da's cock.  Da was hard.  Billy mind went into a spasm.  First he
thought, I'll pretend I didn't notice. But his on cock was excited by the
discovery.  He felt Da gently rubbing his back; he drew closer to him and
his harden cock brushed Da's leg.  He looked up and his eyes met Da's.  He
saw the sadness and the longing.  Slowly he slid closer to him and raised
his leg and layed it between Da's; his thigh resting gently beside Da's
stiff cock. "You know I love you Da," he whispered.  Da nodded and closed
his eyes.  Billy sat up and swung his leg completely over Da's body.  He
rested his hands on Da's chest and pushed himself back.  Da's cock was
nestled between his ass and balls.  Billy could feel the warmth of the
pulsating member. He gentle moved his body back and forth on Da's cock.  Da
inhaled deeply but did not open his eyes. Billy continued his movement
letting the warmth of his young body heat Da's passions.  Da began to pump
his cock, timidly, into the boys flesh. "It's ok Da," Billy said, "It'll
make you feel better,"  Da opened his eyes and Billy repeated, "It's ok,"
and bent down and kiss Da on the lips.  Da held him in his arms and began
pumping more earnestly.  Billy pushed his body into Da's cock providing him
with more friction.  He could feel Da becoming more frantic for release.  He
layed his body over Da's and clamped his thighs around Da's  pulsating
member. Da's cock thrusted and pushed up between his legs. Da's breathing
became shallow.  He was holding on to Billy as if for dear life. He pumped
wildly and finally stiffened and shot his cum all over the boys thighs and
butt. He trembled and the last of load seeped out of him.  Billy could feel
Da's sperm running down the inside of his legs and dripping into his butt
crack.  Da's was staring at him and he smiled and kissed his stepfather.
"Feel a little better?" he asked. Da nodded. "Do you think you can sleep
now?" Billy inquired. Da nodded again.  Billy got up slowly.  He would have
to clean up before going to Timmy. He head for the door; his strained hardon
leading the way.  "Billy," Da whispered.  Billy stopped at the door and
glanced over his shoulder. "Thank you," Da said and there was a bit of peace
in his voice.

What is taking him so long Timmy thought to himself.  He had asked this
question a thousand times since stripping nude and laying on his bed.   His
balls and cock were aching. Damn it he thought, Billy is punishing me for
not wanting to wait earlier so now he's making me wait.  He was  a little
annoyed by the thought.  Billy had never taken this long before.  He began
playing with his cock hoping still that Billy would arrive soon to help him
reach climax.

Billy went into the bathroom and turned on the water.  He tested the
temperature and got in.  His cock felt like it was going to burst.  He let
the warm water stream down his back and butt cheeks. He gently messaged his
on cock.  He had waited so long and now the only thing on his mind was sweet
release.  He grabbed the soap and foamed up his stiff cock; sliding his hand
up and down slowly.  The warm water soothe him: the rythum of his hand felt
delicious.

Timmy worked his cock faster.  His legs were spread wide as he stroked
himself.  His eyes were closed as he jerked his cock and pinched his nipple
with the other hand.  He was raising his butt off of the bed grinding his
cock into his flying fist.  He pushed and pumped his dick into his pumping
fist.  Waiting was no longer an option.

Billy continued sliding his slick hand over his willing cock.  He grabbed
the soap with the other hand lathered his ass.  He shivered and his cock
shook when his hand brushed his hole.  He put the soap down, still massaging
his cock, and ran his hand slowly along his crack.  He pressed his middle
finger against his hole and felt it slide in. "Mmmmmmm," he moaned; moving
the finger in and out of his ass as he continued to stroke his cock.

Timmy released his nipple and reached down with the same hand and grabbed
his balls; he squeezed them. His other hand continued it's onslaught of his
dick.  He was getting close. He rubbed the tense spot between his balls and
ass.  He could felt his cock stiffen and enlarge.  He pumped more
dilibrately now; feeling the inside of his thighs and between his ass and
balls.  "uhaaaaa," he moaned, "ughaaaa."  He arched his back one last time;
his cock jerked and shot his sweet release.

Billy removed his finger and backed up against the wall.  He turn his hand
and positioned his thumb at his hole.  He pushed back with his ass and
forward with his thumb.  When it had slipped in as far as he could get it he
pressed the opposite side of his hand a against the shower wall and rode his
thumb as he massaged his cock.  The provided resistance as he bound back on
his thumb fucking himself. He ground his ass back against his thumb and
pumped his cock eagerly with his other hand.  The electricity rose in his
bowels and spred to his balls.  He felt the head of his cock spasm and the
base jerk. "Oh!" he cried as steady shot of cum splattered on the shower's
curtain.

When Billy arrived downstairs, Timmy pretended to be asleep.  He was still a
bit pissed that Billy had taken so long.  He'd wait for Billy to slip into
bed with him and then they'd talk, he thought to himself.  But Billy didn't
come to his bed or try to wake him.  He slipped into his own bed and turned
his back to Timmy.  Timmy waited and when he couldn't take the silence
anymore said, "Billy? I'm sorry about earlier."  Billy didn't answer.
"Billy?"  Timmy repeated. "Doesn't matter," Billy said, "Forget it." "Don't
you want to sleep with me?" Timmy inquired. "Not tonight.  I got a lot on my
mind," Billy answered.  "We can just sleep," Timmy responded, "Please
Billy?"  Timmy heart sank and tears weld up in his eyes as he heard the
single word response from his brother, "No."

Timmy stayed out of sight for most of the next day.  He didn't know why
Billy was so mad at him that he wouldn't even sleep with him.  After all
they had been through together.  There was no way he could get his mind
around what was happening.

Da brought pizza home for dinner and while the boys were still eating
announced that he was tired and was going to bed. Both Timmy and Billy's eye
watched as he ascended the stairs.  Billy put down his pizza and slowly rose
and followed him.

Da had undressed and was folding his covers back when Billy entered the
room.  They looked at eachother and Billy began unbuttoning his shirt. "No,"
Da said. Billy look up at him a bit confused. "Come in and close the door,"
Da said.  Billy obeyed.  "Billy," Da continued, "Last night....last
night....Billy I've been weak since your mother died. Lost. But this is not
the way.  This your mother would never want."  Billy's eyes filled with
tears. "Didn't you like it Da?" he asked, "Didn't it make you feel better."
Da laughed, "Yes, for a little while.  But I couldn't help thinking....
well, that's not important.  It was a real wake up call to me, son. I love
you Billy; and Timmy too.  I don't want to do anything to hurt you or him;
or that would destory your mother's memory.  So, no more tucking me in or
laying nude with me in my bed. No more."  Billy started to cry, "I'm sorry
Da. I just wanted to make you feel better like I do with Timmy."  Da looked
up suddenly "What?!?, he said.  There was a moment of horror in Billy's eyes
as he realized what he had just said. Da regained his composer and went over
to him and held him as Billy cried in his arms. "Listen to me Billy," Da
said firmly, "I know it has been hard for all of us for a long time.  God, I
know when mom was alive, and sick, we...I didn't think about how things were
affecting you boys.  I'm sorry.  Please forgive me. I love you more than
words can say but no more. Do you understand son? No more with me or with
Timmy."

Timmy's face had been battered. His left eye was puffy and half closed. His
lips were swollen. He looked away as Billy held his own face in his left
hand while the other curled at his right hip; he was crying.

Timmy unfolded his schedule. Shit, he thought, gym. First period.  He didn't
find gym distasteful, exactly.  There was always something interesting to
see.  Most of the guys were use to him; they knew he would look. Some even
"accused" him of being "some kind of faggot" but Timmy had a way of making
everyone smile in the end. He really wasn't interested in the boys at his
school.  Billy was always his truest love.

It hurt him that there had been a two year, no touch, no discuss, policy
between the three of them. Shortly after the conversation Da had with Billy,
Da announced that he had decided that it was indeed time to allow each of
them to have their own room.  Billy got the new room.  Timmy believed that
Billy, eventually, would come to him. He had waited. But Billy never came to
him and when he finally broke the silence and went to Billy; Billy wouldn't
talk about their previous relationship. "There's nothing to talk about," he
would say, "It's over.  Boys experiment with each other all the time when
they're young.  But there's a time when we all have to grow up."  That had
really pissed Timmy off but eventually his love for Billy overwhelmed him
and they were on speeking terms again.

Timmy tried, over the years, to remind Billy of the love they once share:
"Oh gaawwd, Billy," he said once with laughter and a wink, "You look good
enough to eat!"  Billy only look at him with a blank expression.
When that didn't work, Timmy waited in Billy's room for him; clothed.  Billy
refused to enter the room.  They eventually sat in the living room together
and Timmy asked, "Why are you being this way?  Why can't I touch you?  Why
can't I even hug you. Jeessh! Billy, Straight brothers hug. I love you so
much, Billy." Timmy had watched his older brother simply shake his head and
mutter, "That's just the way it has to be."  He smiled at Timmy as he
returned to his room and closed the door.

At 14, Timmy was a beautiful child.  He was slender but fit. His chest was
well defined: his nipples two horizonal peaks; his waist V'd gracefully into
his ample hips and the smooth globes of his ass. He loved the way his gym
suit clung to his ass and caught more than a few of the fellows looking.

It was the normal stuff: get issued your gym suit; try it on; introduce
yourself to the class; do some goofy exercises; shower and on to the next
class. Timmy noticed the new kid almost before anyone else. He wasn't sure
what it was about the kid but he wanted to know him better. "Hi," Timmy said
walking up to the kid and extending a hand, "Timmy's my name."  The boy
looked at Timmy's hand and then into Timmy's eyes before joining his hand
with Timmy's and saying, "Tony, my name is Tony." There was giggling from
the other end of the locker room and a shout, "Hey new kid! Better watch
yourself in the showers. Don't drop the soap!" There was more laughter but
Timmy simply turned to the crowd and said, "Pay no attention to these
children, Tony, most of them can't even find their dicks and rest of them
don't even know what to do with them."  Everyone laughed as Tony just stared
at Timmy.

As it turned out, Tony had two additional classes with Timmy and had moved
in only a few blocks from Timmy's house.  Eventually they became fast
friends and Tony  became a regular around Timmy's house.  Timmy liked having
Tony around. He missed the closeness he had once had with Billy. "Who's your
friend," Billy had asked the second or third time Tony had come to visit.
Timmy heart had lept inside of him just to be talking to Billy about
anything. He told Billy everything about meeting Tony, what they had in
common, everything: "Besides," he had joked, "He kinda cute don't you
think?"  Billy had looked angrily at him then and he immediately regretted
saying it but it was to late.  Billy had turned to go to his room. "Wait
Billy," he had cried, "I'm sorry.  There's nothing going on between us.  I
swear. Please just talk to me. I'm sorry."  Billy had yelled back that he
didn't really care, he said, he was just asking.

Billy avoided Tony like the plague and spent most of his time in his room
whenever Tony was around. "Your brother hates me," Tony had said.  "No,"
Timmy said, "He hates me," and tears rolled down his face. Tony came over
and sat beside him and put an arm around him, "Don't say that," Tony
pleaded, "I'm sure..." "No," Timmy said standing up, "He hates me and it's
time for me to get over it."

Some time after that Tony spent the night for the first time.  They were
watching videos in the living room when Billy returned home from his Junior
Achievement meeting. "Come on," Timmy had said glaring at Billy, "We can
enjoy ourselves better in my room."  Billy shuffled his feet uneasily,
"Timmy," he had started, "I need to talk to you." Timmy kinda laughted and
said, "Yeah right," and he and Tony had gone to his room.

It was Tony who brought it up. "Why do the guys always joke about you being
some kind of a queer or something." "Who knows why assholes do anything," he
said thinking of Billy. "You're mad at Billy, huh?" Tony asked. Timmy didn't
want it to happen but he couldn't help it. He started to cry, "He such an
asshole," he sobbed. Tony put his arm around him, "It's ok Timmy," he said,
"You have me."  Timmy shook his head and Tony held him.  It was the first
time in two and a half years that he had felt another male body this close
to his.  He looked at Tony and he smiled and kissed Timmy gently on the
cheeks.  Tony's eye's searched Timmy's for a moment and then he gently
pressed his lips to Timmy's; just a short gentle kiss.  Timmy brushed the
tears from his eyes and reached up and brushed Tony's hair and cheek.  Tony
pressed his lips to Timmy's again and this time Timmy's lips parted and Tony
slipped his tongue inside of Timmy's mouth.  They layed on the bed legs
intwined; Tony on top of Timmy and kissed.  "Do you mind?" Tony asked, "You
won't tell anyone, will ya?"  Timmy shook his head from side to side.  It
felt good  to be touched and held and kissed.  No he didn't mind.  They
kissed again and Timmy thought of Billy.

That was how it started and for the next two years Tony and Timmy were
inseparatable. They shared their bodies freely with one another and Timmy
found some comfort in this.  "Do you love me?" Tony ask as Timmy was
approaching his 17th birthday.  Tony laid on top of him, his spent cock
still in Timmy's ass, kissing him.  Timmy laughed, "Jesus you're strange.  I
let you fuck my brains out and after you shoot enough cum in me to drown a
whale you ask me if I love you? Jesus, Tony you're my best friend."  Tony
slowly pulled his now deflating cock out of Timmy and rolled off of him.  "I
know we are best friends," Tony answered, "I didn't ask you that.  I want to
know if you love me.  Really love me."

Timmy sat up.  Gawd, he thought, I do love you Tony but not the way you want
me too. And he thought of Billy. "I...I mean," Timmy was trying to say, "I
do but..." Tony's eyes weld up with tears and put a hand to Timmy's mouth to
stop him from going on.  "I understand," Tony said and gently began to cry.
Timmy tried to explain how important Tony was to him but knew that Tony need
more than he could give him.  Tony needed someone to love him as much as
Timmy loved Billy.  That day, they stopped seeing eachother.

Timmy had meet Dean in his freshman year of college. He was introduced to
him by a mutual friend and they hit it off right away.  Dean was openly gay
and by hanging with him Timmy was proclaiming his gayness also.

Billy didn't like Dean and came to Timmy to talk to him about it. "Damn it,"
Timmy had screamed, "I'm 19 years old.  The only person I ever really wanted
to love has done nothing but push me away for the last seven years!  Seven
fucking years, Billy!" Billy just stood there with his head bowed.  "I know
Tim," he said, "I've been an asshole. I'm sorry but please don't go out with
this guy." Tim looked at him and there was anger in his eyes.  He wanted to
hurt Billy as much as he had been hurt during the past seven years. "What
are you going to do for me if I don't go out with him," Tim hissed, "Are you
going to take me to bed and make love to me?" He hadn't waited for an answer
but had brushed passed Billy; jumped into his car and sped away.  Billy
stood frozen in the same spot, with tears rolling down his face, he
whispered, "Yes, Tim, I would."

Billy cried the whole night after Da told him he was not to sleep with him
or Timmy.  He didn't know how to stop with Timmy.  The thought of them not
making love for as long as they both lived had never occurred to him.  He
didn't know what to tell Timmy.  He didn't know if he could stay away from
him.

At first he thought he would just tell Timmy it was time for them to act
like "real brothers."  But any time he was close to him he wanted to have
him in his arms, kiss his lips, drive himself inside of him.  All it took
was an accidental touch and he was overhelmed with desire for his younger
brother.

So he made a  pledge to himself.  He would never be alone with Timmy in the
same room and he would avoid touching him at all cost.  It was a stupid
thing to pledge he would admit later but without it, he knew he would not
have been able to resist Timmy for very long.

Seven year?, he thought to himself. He had watched his younger brother grow
up.  He was just as handsome now as he had been beautiful as a child. Seven
years? It had been a mesirable time for Billy.  He had been happy when Tim
met Tony.  At least during that time Timmy seemed somewhat happy: almost
like his old self again.  He wanted to tell him how much he had missed him;
how much he still loved him; why he had been avoiding him.  He had tried one
night after a Junior Acheivement meeting but it wasn't a good time.  So many
times Tim had tried to talk to him and he couldn't.  He was afraid that if
they talked about it they would wind up in eachothers arms. Gawd! He wanted
that but there was Da.  He had promised.

He became withdrawn really.  He stuck to his studies and after school
activities.  When he was home he spent most of his time in his room, alone.
Sometimes, he allow himself one small pleasure. In the very early hours of
the morning, when he couldn't sleep, he would quietly slip into the old room
he had shared with Tim.  There he would watch his brother sleep and wish he
could slip in between the sheets with him: he never did and to his knowledge
Tim never knew of his secret practice.

Billy had never talked to Tim about his relationship with Tony.  He knew
that at some point it had become sexual but didn't know why it ended.  He
hadn't felt close enough to Tim to ask and after the break up Timmy became
as much as a hermit as he was.

But all that changed as Timmy enter his Sophmore year of college.  Billy was
in his Senior year and preparing for a position in Da's company.  Billy was
glad Timmy had decided to enroll at the same college he was in and they were
at last pleasant to each other when they met in the halls.  Billy didn't
really approve of Timmy's decission to out himself but defended him as any
good brother would.

He had seen Dean around and there was just something about the guy he didn't
like.  And now Tim had gone out with him.  He stood crying for a bit in the
spot where Tim had scolded him. Why couldn't he every tell him how much he
still loved him and wanted him. I've lost him forever, he thought, I've lost
him forever.

Da sat at the restaurant still gazing in disbelief at the documents he had
signed a half hour before. My God Lizzy, he thought, we did it.  He had
spoken to his dead wife since the night he and Billy had "slept" together.
He had begged her forgiveness a thousand times.  He had promised her again
and again that night that he would make it up to the boys. Somehow.

Nine months after her death, he had received a letter from an attorney.  He
turned out to be the executor of Lizzy's will.  A will that Da knew nothing
of.  The long and short of it was that there was an insurance policy.  After
taxes, and outstanding debts, Da received a payment of 1.3 million dollars.
"Don't worry Darling", she had said the morning the word cancer entered
their lives, "You and the boys will make it and I won't be in pain anymore."
It was then that Da had cried and Billy had pulled Timmy to their room.

He had taken $500,000 for each of the boys and put it in trust.  They could
do with it what they wanted when they reached 21. Da took the rest and
started NeuroTech, a firm that used human brain algorithms and integreted
them with computer circuits.  Nobody really thought it would work but Da was
looking at a contract that would net him 50 million dollars at worst and
guaranteed the boys 5 million in their first years in the company and a
sizable amount for each additional year.

Da put the contract and the downpayment in his brief case and started for
the door.  His cell phone rang.  It was Billy. Timmy was at the hospital.

Timmy's face had been battered. His left eye was puffy and half closed. His
lips were swollen. He looked away as Billy held his own face in his left
hand while the other curled at his right hip; he was crying.

Timmy had gone directly to Dean's place that night.  They were suppose to
meet at "The Lark" a local gay hang out.  Dean was shocked when Timmy
arrived at his door.  Although Timmy had said he was interested in pursuing
a relationship with him it never got very far and Timmy certainly never had
come to his apartment.  But here he was; crying and upset.

"Hey!" Dean had said studying Timmy, "Come on in. What's wrong?"  Timmy had
said it was nothing really just another fight with his asshole brother.
They sat on the couch together and Timmy ask Dean if he would just hold him.
  Dean did; gently stroking Timmy's back.  Timmy calmed down quite abit and
looked up and smiled at Dean; and he kissed him, "Thank you for being here,"
  Timmy had said, "I think we can go now."

But Dean had no intentions of leaving now that he had Tim where he wanted
him.  "Come on, baby," he had urged, "Let's go to bed.  I've been waiting so
long for you."  Timmy had refused and Dean got anger.  "You fucking tease!"
he had screamed, "I oughta kick your ass!"  Timmy had gotten up to leave but
Dean pushed him back on to the couch.  "I don't think I want to see you
anymore," Timmy had said.  Dean screamed, "What! You fucking whore, I'll
tell you when we're through!; and he had slap Timmy then.

Timmy tried to get to the door but Dean wrestled him to the ground slapping
and punching him as he went. Timmy fought as long as he could. But Dean was
vicious. When Timmy fought to keep his pants on, Dean knee him in the groin
and punched him in the face and ribs until he stripped him. Timmy was
begging through his tears, "Please Dean, no, please stop."

Dean ignored him and forced him on his stomach and enter Timmy's protesting
ass. Timmy scream from the pain of the violent attach but fought no more.
He lay praying Dean would finish and let him go.  He cried softly for Billy.

It was hearing the whispered word that set him off.  "What! Bitch! You been
playing me?! Dean screamed, "You been fucking someone else this whole
fucking time." As his cock pumped into Timmy's ass, his fist pounded the
back and side of Timmy's head until he passed out.

He didn't know how he had gotten to the hospital.  A neighbor had heard the
screams and  pounding and called the police.  Dean was under arrest and
Timmy had no permenant damage.

"You can say it," Tim had said to Billy, "You can tell me you told me not to
go." Billy had looked at him tenderly and said, "There are so many things I
want to say but that's not one of them."

Timmy had lashed out at him, "So many things? What the hell can you tell me
that I don't already know?  You and Da think you know everything and think I
don't know shit! You swore, Billy, you swore to me that you would never
leave me, never hurt me!  But you did! You hurt me more than Dean could have
ever hurt me.  You left me alone!"

It was then that Timmy turned away from his brother and Billy began to cry.
"Timmy," Billy said through his tears, "I never stopped loving you.  God,
Tim, you have to believe me.  So many times I watched you sleep at
night...."  Tim turned back suddenly and looked at his brother, "What!?" he
asked. "Sometimes," Billy continued, "I couldn't take how far apart we had
become so I would come to your room when you were asleep and just watch you.
  I just wanted to be close to you." Billy gazed at his brother tenderly
with tears sreaming down his face.

"I know what happened with you and Da," Tim said matter of factly.  Billy
looked at him with big eyes. "I wasn't spying or anything. I just heard Da
talking to you about it; about you and him and you and me."  "I'm sorry,"
was all that Billy could muster.  For all these years Timmy had known.  He
had known. "I needed you Billy.  Ok, maybe it would have been hard without
the sex but I needed you to hold me and tell me it would be all right.  To
rustle my hair. To touch me, just to touch me, just to let me know you still
loved me."

Billy bent down and gently kissed Tim's bruised cheeks, "I do still love
you," Billy paused, "In more ways than one."  Tim shook his head, "No
Billy," he said, "I don't...." "Please don't say you don't still love me
too," Billy pleaded, "I couldn't bare it." "You left me alone," Tim cried,
"For seven years you barely spoke to me; never touched me.  Now you want to
pretend it didn't happen?"  "No," Billy said shaking his head, "I want the
chance to make it up to you."

Da arrived at the hospital to discover that Timmy was in ICU on the 3rd
floor.  Timmy had been beaten and raped. God, Lizzy, he thought.  He knew
that Billy had already arrived and eagerly pushed the buttons to the
elevator. His heart was racing.  The elevator was taking to long; he spotted
the stairs.

He went bounding up the stairs desperate to see Timmy.  Da never made it. A
hospital attendent found him some hours later just a half flight down from
Timmy's floor.  He had had a heart attack. He had died rushing to see Tim.

They had gone to the furneral together.  Billy had held Tim's hand during
the whole service.  For years after that people talked about how Da's death
had brought them together. It didn't matter to them what other people
thought.

By the time Da's estate came out of probate, Billy had graduated from
college and had take up his position as Senior Vice President of Computer
Mathematics.  At 21, he bought the penthouse in which he and Tim lived in
until this day.

Tim had smiled brightly as he watched his older brother graduate with
honors.  He had healed from his ordeal with Dean and though Billy had been
kind and gentle with him since then they hadn't made love.  Tim had planned
a night out at their favorite restaurant, then to the symphony, to celebrate
the graduation.  Billy came over and hugged him and Tim held on to him.
"I'm so proud of you," Tim said. They laughed holding one another. "We
better go if we are going to make dinner and the symphony,"  Tim reminded
Billy.  Billy looked Tim in the eyes and caressed his cheek with the back of
his hand, "I don't want to go to dinner or the symphony but I will if you
want too."

They didn't speak as they undressed eachother. And when they finally stood
nude before one another they laughed in part out of uneasiness and in part
because there long exile from one another was over.

They layed together on the bed gently touching and caressing one another;
rediscovering eachothers bodies. They kissed long and slow and made love to
one another throughout the night.  Billy was scared about entering Tim after
he had been so brutally raped. "Are you sure?" Billy asked again and again,
"We don't have to do that if it brings back bad memories."  Timmy was sure.
He pulled Billy on top of him, "I want you inside me.  Please don't argue
anymore."  Billy didn't and they both gave sighs of releif when his cock
finally slipped into Timmy.  They never forgot that night and remembered it
as the night they fell in love again.  The End

epilog

Tim took the glass from Billy and put it on the black marble table next to
Billy's favorite chair. "Ok," he said, "If you're in one of your moods
tonight, I know what will make you feel better."  He smiled and reached out
his hand.  Billy shook his head but smiled and took Tim's hand; and Tim led
him to their bedroom.