Date: 8 Jan 1995
From: Drow Elf
Subject: Lucifer's Nephew

   My Uncle was a crafty old fox.  He was the black sheep of our
family, but cared less, and in fact boasted of his nefarious doings
to his brothers, who sighed and shook their heads.  At one time he
had two wives in different cities (we joked about his playing
'double Jeopardy'); he once swindled a casino out of 50,000
dollars; he became a CEO of a small company by using doctored
credentials; he was involved in insider trading on the stock
market.  A thousand other shameful details circulated about the
man, all of which he would either confirm or deny--whichever would
enhance his prestige to the inquiring party.  But actually most of
the rumors were true, if somewhat embellished here and there.

   When I was a young'un, I used to try to take after my Uncle.
I thought that I'd like to be just the daring villain he was.  I
wish I had known better, but you know how kids are.
   I had light brown hair, blue eyes, a fair complexion, and a look
of innocence which usually concealed my delinquent thoughts.
Teachers would be loath to suspect me of things that I actually
did, which helped me follow in Unkie's steps without too much
friction.
   During the summer Unkie would take me with him on boating and
camping trips.  I'd do things I never got to do at home--smoke
cigarettes, drink liquor, and cuss.  Often we'd both get drunk and
he'd tell me raunchy stories.  I idolized him and thought he could
do anything.  "Gosh, Unkie... Did you Really do that?"  I'd say
with big round eyes.  "Yep," he'd reply.  "Now, don't tell yer
parents about dat!"

   Time passed and I began high school.  Unkie was still a revered
figure to me.  He lived 4 blocks away, and I visited him every so
often and we'd drink beer and watch TV.  But he seemed to act
differently towards me now.  I'd catch him staring at me sometimes,
and then I'd look up, and he'd turn away.  I should've known why,
but I didn't think about it much.

   I had been making money by selling pot to the other kids at
school.  Unkie was proud when I told him about it, and to my
surprise he offered to sell me the stuff at a cheaper price then
what I had been paying.  I said, "Unkie, I didn't know you did
drugs!"   He said, "I don't.  But dat's where de money is, kiddo!"
and he laughed.  "Yes sir," he continued, "yer gonna make a fine
salesman, you are!"  I smiled and said "Yeah..."

   My business went on for several months while I attended school,
until one day I got busted, and several weird things happened.
What transpired really blew my mind.  You could say that I suddenly
noticed that those growths on Unkie's skull were actually horns...
and that I might grow a pair of my own if I didn't reform.
   I did reform.  I quit selling drugs, cleaned up my act, and got
a part-time job delivering newspapers.  I ceased associating with
my Uncle.  I even flirted with organized religion for a spell,
attending church services from time to time.
   Then a year later at Christmas dinner when the whole family was
together, he exchanged looks with me across the table.  His eyes
have a hypnotic quality to them which he exploits to his fullest
advantage on rare occasions--such as this one.  I finally relented.
After I had finished eating I excused myself from the table, curtly
nodding to him.  He did the same and followed after me.  We went
for a walk outside, into the night, and had a long, heated
discussion.  He revealed secrets to me then that I had never known.
But that's another story.


   I went over to Unkie's house after I got busted and told him the
whole story.


"...the teacher found the stuff in my locker, and I just died!  I
thought I was a goner!"

He smiled, nodded, and said, "Go on."

"Well, I said someone put it there, that it wasn't mine, and she
said "Right." and took me to the principal's office."

"Oh, shit."

"Yeah!  I knew they could put me in jail and all that.  So I
started thinking about how I could get out of this."

Unkie laughed, because that's exactly what he would've done in my
situation--look for angles.

Unkie said, "Did you get out of it?"

"Yes!  That's what I'm telling you about!  But you can't tell
nobody about what I did, Unkie!  I'm serious!  It's a deep dark
secret and would make a big mess if it ever got out!"

Unkie's eyes grew wide with interest.  He got up and reached
underneath a coat which was lying on the sofa, and his hands moved
around a bit, and then he took out a pack of cigarettes and offered
me one, which I accepted.

Unkie said, "So how'd you do it?"  He reached over and lit my
cigarette.

"Well, I had heard rumors about this guy, you know, the principal."

"Yes?"

"Well, I had heard that he bats both ways, you know, he's gay, so
I started thinking about that.  Then he calls me in, and I sit down
in front of his desk.  He asks me a bunch of questions, and I say
~I dunno~ to all of them.  Then he shows me the bag of reefer that
the teacher found, and asks me if I know where it came from.  I say
~No~ and he shakes his head and says, ~I'm afraid I'm going to have
to call the police.~
    So then I look up at him with mournful, innocent eyes like
this--!"

I kneeled down and gave my lost-puppy look.  Unkie grinned.

"--and asked him if there was anything, anything at all I could do
to make up for my crime.  And he looks at me hard and doesn't say
nothing.  So I walk to where he's sitting and kneel down beside
him, and put my hands on his lap, and I look up at him.  ~Please,
if I can do anything for you!~  And he still doesn't say nothing,
but stares at me with what I figure is lust.  So I reached over to
his zipper and pulled it down, and he didn't stop me, so I reached
in and pulled his pecker out and gave him a blowjob.  I know he
enjoyed that shit because he started moaning and he grabbed my
shirt and gripped it tightly.  It didn't take long before he was
ready to cum, so I pulled his pecker out of my mouth and he shot
cum all over his suit!"

I laughed, and said, "Man, he didn't come out of his office for a
long time after that!  I think he called his wife to bring him
another shirt and coat.  But anyways, after he was finished cumming
he said ~You can go now...~ so I left and went back to class.  The
teacher asked me what happened and I said they found the guy who
put the stuff in my locker, and I sat down."

Finished with my story, I stopped and took a few drags of my
cigarette, watching Unkie.

  He smiled and said, "That was pretty clever, Eric."  He got up
and sat next to me.  I looked up at him.  He said, "Why don't you
do something like that with me now?"

I said, "Huh?  What do you mean?"

He grasped my leg with one hand and touched my pants button with
the other.  I moved out of his reach and said, "No way!  I just did
that to get out of trouble!"

He said, "You'll have to do that again, then."

I paused, confused, and said, "What do you mean by that?  You...
you can't tell no one.  I'll just say you're lying."

"Tell anyone?  I never squeal on nobody!  But I got dis--!"  he
reached over to under the coat on the sofa, and pulled out a little
tape recorder, which was still running!  I opened my mouth in
shock, saying nothing.

He said, "Whassa matter kid, you look white as a ghost!"

I stuttered, then felt like I was about to cry.  "But, but, Unkie
you can't do that to me!  You wouldn't!"

Unkie cast his eyes down, ashamed, but instantly recovered, being
the scoundrel that he is.  He pointed at my posterior and said,
"For that, I would!"  Then he laughed and plucked out the tape,
placed it on a high shelf, and told me to march into his bedroom
Now.  I complied, having little alternative, and he followed and
closed the door.

A few minutes later my pants were around my knees, and he was
fucking me.

I endured it.  It didn't really hurt, and it was over quick, I
guess because Unkie wanted me so bad.  After he finished, he gave
me the tape and apologized, snickering all the while.  I cussed him
out and then left.

All that stuff pissed me off.  All I could say was, at least it was
over and I wouldn't be going to jail or anything.
I shredded the tape and threw it in the trash when I got home.