Date: Sat, 10 Jan 2009 10:25:15 -0800 (PST)
From: Riku Sora <gaycartoonkid@yahoo.com>
Subject: Negative Chapter 1

                      Okay this is my first post in a while. My others
were quit different and more of an experiment from a long time ago so if
you like this one, you may not like those and vice versa so if you're
looking for more of the same from a few years ago, sorry this will
probably disappoint you. You should know, I like to write STORIES, with
actual characters with actual lives (well fictional lives, but you know
what I mean). I don't like writing stores like "Oh the pizza guy's here,
and for some unknown reason he's naked".  So if you just wanna jerk off,
this probably isn't the story for you. There is no sex (that's right
NONE) in this first installment of the story. But I hope you'll like it
anyway. Oh and if incest, or hints of incest offend you in any way, or if
you're not of a legal age to read such things, of live in a state where
it's prohibited please do not read this and if you do, the arthur (me)
assumes no responsibility  because I warned ya.


				 Negative

				 Chapter 1

It had been forever since I last saw my cousin. We were born on the same
day and as children we'd have our parties together, but when he was 10 he
moved away and that was the last time I saw him. I wondered how he looked
now 8 years later. I wondered if he still looked like my negative.
Everyone said we looked exactly the same expect he was born with coal
black hair and a light complexion while I was born with blonde hair and a
dark complexion. Everyone used to ask us which one was the evil twin
growing up. His mom used to tell me I was like a negative of a photo of
him, dark where he is light and light where he is dark.

I wondered if he still resembled me as strongly now after all the years
of changes. We always enjoyed swimming, but over the years I'd started
doing more often. I know had the typical swimers body that went along
with it, slender yet muscular, my abs coming to an almost perfect 'V'
right above my pubic area. And of course I wondered about that too.
Wondered if his pubic hair would have grown in  the same as the hair on
his head, and be dark as midnight, just as mine had grown in as bright as
a sunny day. I'd missed so much time with him. It broke my heart when he
left.

I'll never forget the tears streaming down his innocent face as his
parents pulled away with him on to a supposed better life. I didn't stop
crying for days. We'd always been so close, and could tell each other
anything. Though we were only cousins we were closer than brothers. I
couldn't stand to be without him and he felt the same about me. When we
were only five told me he wanted to grow up with me, and never be away
from me. And then without hesitation, he quietly said to me "Jamie, I
want to marry you someday". I giggled and said we were both boys. He said
he didn't care, he still wanted to marry me. Sometimes I'd tease him
about  it when we got older and we starting talking about things boys on
the edge of their teen years talk about. I would tell him not to forget
he couldn't date anyone cause he was already engaged and he'd be cheating
on me.  He'd always just smile and his face would turn red.  It was our
own private joke just between us.

I wondered why his father would call me up after all these years. He said
something about Jeremy being in trouble, but didn't go into detail. I
guess our birthday was a reminder to him. Today we'd both turn 18, and
when he called me, he said he worried so much about his son now that he
was going to be a legal adult.  He told me he and my aunt had split up
just two years after the move. This was a shock, I'd heard nothing from
any of them over the years. Not even the first letter. Jeremy had
promised he'd write to me, but I never heard from him.

As I stepped off the train I was greeted by Jeremy's father. I
didn't except to feel the way I did, I wanted to hit him as soon as I saw
his face. I didn't realize how much anger I felt for him till now, but
the second I saw him, the image of my cousin's face with tears streaming
down his cheeks flashed into my head, and standing before me was the
man responsible for taking him away. I'd never forgiven him, but only now
did I realize it. But I buried my feelings, this was not the time.

We said our hellos, and then after a long silence he asked me how I was
doing. We made small talk like that for a while, talking about the
weather, work, and school and then finally headed off. As we drove off I
finally asked him where Jeremy was. He told me he didn't know I was
coming. I figured he wanted to surprise Jeremy at first, but then I could
see by the look on his face it wasn't something so simple.

"I'm sorry." He said abruptly.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"We thought it was best. You were each other's whole world, hardly any
other friends. I guess it scared us. We wanted him to have a life outside
of you. The two of you were so close, too close! Closer than little boys
are supposed to be, we didn't know what else to do." He said, looking
straight ahead not wanting to face me.

I could see the look of pain and shame on his face. I still didn't fully
understand. Was he saying he took Jeremy away because we were friends? I
wanted to scream at him, I wanted tell him how dare he hurt us like this,
but instead I was frozen. A million thoughts and reactions racking
through my brain. I didn't know what to say, what to do. But he didn't
give me the chance to say or do anything. Without looking away from the
road, he reached over and popped open the glove box, a stack of
sealed envelopes spilled out into my lap. I picked one up and read the
front. My name and old address written in a child's handwriting.

"He wrote you everyday that first year." He said.

I couldn't take it any longer, I thought I was going to start yelling,
but instead all that came out was what seemed like a never ending stream
of tears. He didn't stop caring about me. He thought about me every day.

The car pulled into an ally. I didn't know what was happening. Jeremy's
dad got out and told me to follow him.  As I got out I could hear all
kinds of shouting and what sounded like some kind of song coming from
an abandoned building. As I got closer I knew the song, I'd just heard it
that morning before I left. It  was "happy birthday", but
you couldn't really make out the words only the rhythm. I could clearly
hear the voices singing it, but they weren't speaking clearly. It was
more like noises that resembled words coming from their mouths.

There was a door on the side of the building at the end of the ally.
Jeremy's dad went inside and motioned for me to follow.  As I went
through the door I was blinded by the sudden darkness. But slowly my eyes
began to adjust and I could see a group of guys standing around a figure
in a chair, my head was spinning. The moment felt so surreal and my mind
was not comprehending anything. I started walking around unnoticed to the
side of the figure, and then as he turned I could see... me. I was
sitting there in the chair, no wait... not me, the other me. The missing
part of me. He looked up at me stunned. I know how I looked at that
moment because I was watching it, just as if I was looking into some
twisted mirror. One of the other boys noticed me finally.

"Holy shit, this is some good stuff Jeremy, there's two of you right
now." The boy said.

"Jamie?" He finally said.

He stood up and walked over to me. He nearly fell into my arms and held
me so tight I thought I was going to be crushed. There was an urgency in
his grip, like a man dying of thirst grasping a cold bottle of water and
drinking me in. I held him just as tightly, just as much urgently and it
felt as if time stopped on that moment. Nothing else mattered, not this
place, not all the years that had passed, none of it existed anymore.
There was just us. Then suddenly I felt myself leave that world we were
in as he loosened his grip.

"You shouldn't have come." He said, taking his arms away from me, and
breaking out embrace.

"What's going on here Jeremy?" I asked.

"Just go back home. Leave me alone." He said.

My very being shattered, I couldn't believe he was saying this. I looked
around, more aware now of the details. There was a table in front of the
chair he'd been sitting in. It was covered in white residue and finally I
understood.

"No Jeremy, tell me this isn't your life." I said.

"I said leave it, just go home!" He screamed.

"Jeremy please talk to him." His father said.

Jeremy looked up at his father, I think just realizing he was there.
"You... you did this, you brought him here, now? Do you hate me that
much?" He said darting for the door.  Before I knew it I was chasing
after him.  I was again blinded as I entered the street, this time by the
light but just for a few seconds, then I could see Jeremy heading up the
ally.

"Wait Jeremy please, I just wanna talk." I said.

"Oh now you wanna talk, 8 years later you wanna talk. We're not little
boys anymore you don't know me anymore." He shouted back.

"Maybe I don't know you, but I still love you." I said.

He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to me. I could see the anger in
his eyes. "Love me?" He said, staring at me with a look of confusion and
anger.  "Are you saying that cause we have a few amusing genes that make
us so called family? You don't get the right to say that just cause we're
related! You fucking forgot me, didn't write, didn't call, nothing for 8
fucking years, and you just show up and say you love me?! FUCK YOU!" He
said and turned to go on his way.

I chased after him out of the ally and down the street finally catching
 up with him "I didn't know where you were. There was never an address or
phone number, I couldn't call or write, I would have every day if I did,
I would have been here if I knew where you were." I said.

"Bullshit, I wrote you everyday for a whole year. I gave you my phone
number, and all you had to do was look at the return address to write me
back." He said still moving on.

"Go to your father's car then, look in the passenger seat." I said.

"Why?" He asked, finally stopping.

"Just do it, please." I pleaded.

He paused for a moment thinking about it, and then turned around heading
back to the ally. He opened the passenger door, and saw the letters
laying there. A whole years worth. He was silent as he picked one up and
looked at it.

"There's no post mark, it was never mailed. Today is the first time I've
ever saw them." I explained.

"She told me she mailed them. Every day. I always made sure I had it
ready to go before she went to the post office. Every morning, she even
reminded me to have them ready. She bought books of stamps just for me so
I could have everything ready. Why would she do that? Why wouldn't she
mail them?" He said staring at the pile of letters.

Finally, I could see a glimpse of the boy who left. Under all the rage,
and the chemicals floating in his blood, he was still Jeremy. I walked up
to him and put my arm around his shoulder. He didn't say anything. I was
still half expecting him to shrug me off, but he just let me be close to
him again.

"I missed you." He finally whispered.

"I missed you too." I said. "Jeremy what's going on? What are you doing
in a place like this?" I asked.

"Not now, please Jamie, not now." He begged.

The driver's side door opened surprising us both. I don't know how long
Jeremy's father had be outside, or how much he heard and saw,
but apparently he knew this was the opportunity he needed.

"Well, guys you ready to head home?" He asked us.

Jeremy didn't say anything, he just climbed into the back seat. I decided
not to ride shotgun, I wanted to stay as close to Jeremy as possible so I
climbed in right behind him.  I suddenly remembered when we were kids,
his father would make him ride up front with him and his mother while I
road in the back seat, I never understood why at the time. I figured any
second now his father would demand that Jeremy come up front with him,
but to my surprise he said nothing as he started the car and backed out.

"I'm tired." Jeremy said out of nowhere.

Without saying anything I pulled him over to me and his head came to rest
on my shoulder. He sighed with content as he began to drift off to sleep.
It felt so good feeling him there, so close to me again. I got a little
concerned though, he had been ready to fight just a moments before, and
now he was fast asleep.

"Don't worry, he'll be fine, used to scare me too." His father said.

I guess he could see the concern in my face from the rear view mirror. As
we drove off I didn't know what to expect. I knew things were coming,
probably fighting, crying, and who knows what else, but right now it
didn't matter. He was here. Nothing else mattered.

End part 1