Date: Tue, 29 May 2012 15:13:54 +0200
From: Shawn Edwards <shawnedwards92@gmail.com>
Subject: Diary of a cum slut 3a
I left the water and basked in the sun besides the pool. It was 1pm. I
was the only one there so i just wore my speedo. I closed my eyes as i
let the sun sink. "Hey," i heard Chris
voice. "Hie," i said. I sat up and he
sat down. "Fancy goin out?" "Where?" i
replied with another question. "You shall see," he
smiled at me. I didnt want to go. I knew it was
wrong but his smile made me want him. It made me give in to my
desires. He took my hand and i followed after him. We went to his
house and he dressed me in his three quarter shorts and t-shirt. He
took me to his car and we drove off. I didnt care where he took me. So
long as i was with him. We drove out of the city and pretty soon we
took a left turn and went up a rocky hill. We got to the top of the
hill and got out of the car. The place was beautiful. There was a dark
green lawn with small daisies. It overlooked the city of Houston. I
looked to the side and saw a cloth spread on the ground with a basket.
I knew then that he had a picnic in mind. We sat and ate in silence
most of the time. We were both unusualy silent, not that we talked
much but i could sense something was wrong on both ends.
On my end i was troubled with
the fact that i was on a date. The more i saw it as a date the more it
troubled me. I knew it would complicate things. I was inlove with him
though i tried to fight it. There was no way i could win the fight. I
knew i would loose and surrender my heart to him. I wasnt ready to do
that. In the end there was a question that lingered in my mind. Why
had i agreed to come? It would further weaken my defenses being with
him hence letting him walk right in and take over me. Those were my
thoughts as i ate in silence. He was also silent.
"So what do you do for a living?" Chris finaly broke the silence and i
wished he hadnt. "I work the night shift
at a 24hr flower shop," i lied. "Dont lie to me," he said
seriously. "Im not lying," i said with ease.
"Dont play coy with me. You are a
prostitute," Chris said. I froze. How on earth
had he known my secret. My cat was out of the bag and never coming in
again. I couldnt think straight and all i could do was drop my food. I
stood up and ordered him to take me home. I felt angry, ashamed and
betrayed. It was all an outburst of mixed emotions and they were
freaking me out. Would he love me again? What would i do next? How
would he see me? I was so worried i even forgot he was an ex porn
star. I sat in the car in silence. He sat besides me and i looked out
through the window. I couldnt look him in the eye. The drive was even
more awkward than the picnic itself. I knew he had been silent because
he had been thinking about it. I knew i was beyond screwed. Though
love with Chris was totaly out of the question. I knew i had sucker
fierce to fall back to. I would work till i forgot he ever existed.
I looked at him at the
corner of my eye and looked out again. He was angry and i could see
it. Why couldnt he be? I had been a lying bitch. He had confessed and
told me he was once a porn star but quit. I had lied and pretended i
was holier than thou. He had done so because he wanted to commit. I
had been unfaithful and the fact that i was doing other men disgusted
him. He would hate me forever. He dropped me and we both went to our
apartments in silence. It was already 6pm and nearly work time. I
showered absent mindedly and sat on my dresser to make up. Alex was
more powerful than sucker fierce now. I now understond why they said
love conquered all
I wanted so much to work but at the same time i didnt. I worried about
how Chris saw and thought of me. It was now that i could see i loved
him desperately. He was one in a million. He burned my gasoline and i
would rather die young than live my life without him. I would rather
not live at all. After minutes of war with myself i decided to work. I
would busy myself and try to get over him. I put on my make up and
checked my emails. My Nigerian regular was there. I would start with
him. If he fucked the life out of me then i would forget about Chris.
I left my apartment in silence, trying to hide from him so he couldnt
see or hear me leave.
I entered the hotel room. He sat on his usual
spot and smiled broadly at me. His smile reminded me of someone who i
thought had died a few minutes ago. It brought him to life. His teeth
were shiny white and looked more white because of his ebony african
skin. I then saw Chris face and my heart pounded. I shook my head and
saw his own handsome dark face. I wouldnt let Chris ruin my work. I
did my usual strip tease as he smiled. I dont know how i did it but
when i came back to my senses i was already taking him down. All 12in
of his black rod were down my throat. I knew then that i had been
absent minded. I tried to focus but whenever he touched me i felt
Chris and not him. This was bad. I felt his first load fill me all of
a sudden and realised i was absent again. I wasnt giving my all. My
dick wasnt even erect. I stood up and he kissed me. I didnt kiss him.
He could sense something was wrong but chose to ignore it and enjoy
me. He would take me however he wanted because he saw i wasnt
initiative. He bent me down and roughly entered me. I felt pain. This
time it didnt come with pleasure it was just pain. He pounded me more
aggressively than ever and my work had never been this painful.
He lift me up roughly and slammed me into a wall. The pain was
doubled. I deserved all the pain in the world. I was a bad bitch and
he wouldnt forgive me. I had to try and set things straight with him.
"You are hurting me. Stop! Please!" i begged.
he increased his pace deliberately. "Cant
you take it bitch!" he said. "Please!
Stop!" he wasnt stopping. This was nolonger sex. He was raping me and
wouldnt stop till he wanted. I elbowed him on the abdomen hard and he
stopped and groaned holding his abdomen in pain. His dick slid out as
he backed away from me. I kicked him on the face as he was bent in
pain. He screamed and cursed when he fell. I took my clothes and wore
them then got away before he woke. I ignored the pain as i ran. I had
broke the rules by hitting a client. It was against the man whore
laws. He would influence the others and i would lose customers. I now
didnt care. I had considered myself out. I had quit. I had retired and
i had a new game plan.
I would go to Chris and
apologise. He was once a porn star and he of all people couldnt judge
me. He would forgive me and i would beg him to love me. The drive got
longer. I couldnt wait to get there and plead my case. I parked my car
and rushed to his apartment. I knocke loudly for sometime then tried
the door. It was locked. I took my cellphone and tried his number it
was on voice mail. I looked around looking for someone to ask. I
wouldnt rest till i found him and told him how i felt. I wouldnt rest
until i let him know that it was him he was the one i loved. The one i
needed the one i saw and he put my love on top. He had to know that i
would give anything for him and i would quit my job just to be with
him. I knocked again loud though i knew he wasnt home. I heard some
footsteps and my heart skipped a beat. It was him.
I looked in the direction of the footsteps and my heart sank. I was
Vic another ternant. He seemed to be coming to me. Yes he was. He
smiled. "You lookin for Chris?" he asked.
"Yeah you seen him?" i asked. "He left
something for you," he said handing me a small letter.
I took it and he quickly walked away. My heart pounded now. I
slowly and hesitantly opened the letter and my heart nearly ripped my
chest open. It read:
DONT YOU
DARE TRY TO LOOK FOR ME. DONT EVER COME NEAR ME I NEVER WANT TO SEE
YOUR LYING ASS AGAIN. I THOUGHT I COULD LOVE YOU BUT I WAS WRONG. HAVE
A NICE LIFE YOU BITCH AND LETS SEE IF ANY ONE OF THOSE BASTARDS LOVES
YOU LIKE I DID. HAVE A NICE LIFE.
I wanted to cry but i
couldnt. I wouldnt cry. I hadnt lost him already, no, not without a
fight. He was mine and thats how it would end. With SUCKER FIERCE and
ALEX combined he would be mine. All i had to do was look for him