Date: Thu, 20 Jan 2000 14:15:15 -0800 (PST)
From: Bob Archman <Bldhrymn@excite.com>
Subject: Uncle Jake One

Uncle Jake- Part One

By Bald Hairy Mam, bldhrymn@aol.com Or bldhrymn@excite.com

This is an adult story about mature men. It is not for children or immature
persons of any age. No effort at safe sex practices has been made. It is a
fantasy. Clyde and Wilbur are characters introduced in Preaching to the
choir. This is their early history.

My brother and I were trouble. Those who liked us, like our mother, thought
we were high spirited. Those who didn't like us, like all the teachers and
the principal of our school, thought we were jerks. Looking back from the
ripe old age of thirty, I must admit that out teachers were right.  We were
the worst know-it-alls in the Madison High School.

I am Clyde Smith, my brother is Wilbur. We are twins.  Identical twins.
Real identical. Mom and Dad could tell us apart if they were concentrating,
but it was difficult to tell us apart at a quick glance. We made it a point
to move fast when we were being bad, and usually could blame the problem on
the other brother. Dad solved the problem by spanking us both. He said that
if we weren't exactly guilty of the exact wrong we were being punished for,
we were guilty of something. He was a sensible man.

Mom felt bad about punishing us for something that we might not have
actually done, so she let us off easy. Dad worked two jobs, carpenter in
the day time and night watchman, so Mom ran things most of the time. We got
away with murder.

By the time we were sixteen we were too smart to work and way too smart to
need to study.  Dad hurt his back, and couldn't work as hard, and Mom went
to work too. The medical bills made it difficult to make ends meet. We
weren't poor, but there was nothing extra.

When you are sixteen year old boys in Southside Richmond a car was a very
important thing. We wanted one bad, but were weren't mechanically oriented,
so we couldn't get a jalopy and fix it up, and our folks could afford
one. We decided to borrow one from our neighbor.

It was not a good idea.  We didn't think we were steeling the car, we just
wanted to use it. The neighbor never came home in the daytime and would
never know that we used it. He never came home in the day time except for
the day we took it.

To make a long story short, Mom did a lot of crying, and Dad some begging
and we did not go to jail. The neighbor withdrew the charges, but it
behooved us to get out of town. Now as stupid sixteen year olds, we thought
that this was a chance for independence, a chance to get way from school
and our parents and live the sophisticated life we thought we deserved.

We were out of school on three months probation, so Dad decided to send us
to a relative in the most God forsaken, isolated and out of the way place
he could think of. We went to West Virginia. Grand Daddy's first wife's
brother, Uncle Jake, lived somewhere in the mountains on a large plot of
land. We had never met him.

Granddaddy was not our favorite relative. We realized early on that he got
our number. "If anyone can straighten those jerks out it will be Jake." He
muttered. Mom objected, but we had gone too far to and Dad and Granddaddy
had the upper hand.

It was a sad day when Granddaddy arrived in his Dodge Aries and took us
with a few suit cases into exile.  It was a twelve hour drive. We started
on Interstates, moved to US highways, then state highways, and ended up on
a gravel roads. There was no town near the place it was the middle of
nowhere. We turned at an End of State Maintenance sign and moved on a
rutted dirt road deep into the woods.

After five minutes we found the house.  It looked like a summer cabin. We
had never seen Uncle Jake, and no one had described him. He sat on the
porch on a rocking chair. He was a good six-four and two hundred and fifty
pounds. A good twenty-five of the pounds must have been hair. He was bald,
with a full grey beard, that merged with the hair poking out of his open
collar and the buttons on his shirt.

Wilbur and I are tall, six feet, but a bit on the lanky side. Even then we
had guessed that we were not the conventional image of teenage dream boats.
Natural, that is dirty, blonds, we matured early. By twelve we had cocks
and needed to shave every few days. Pubic hair began to grow, but unlike
most of our classmates, it didn't stop. It grew from our cocks , up the
center of our stomachs. It spread out across our chests, and then proceed
over our shoulders and down our backs.  As it did this it retreated on out
heads. We weren't completely bald yet, but it was obvious that we would be
bald by the time he made twenty.  By sixteen we were fully mature men.

The girls did not line up to date us. As a mater of fact, some kids move
away from us in the shower room.  When I saw Uncle Jake I knew where or
hair came from.  Granddaddy introduced us.  He grunted. Granddaddy asked
where Aunt Alice was.

"Dead." Jake said.

"Damn it Jake. You need to write more often!" Granddad said.

"Well, she got real mean near the end. It was a blessing." The giant man
said. "Its been nice and peaceful since her passing." We didn't know if it
had been a blessing for him or for her. We weren't going to ask.

"Well, I'd better get on my way." Grand dad said. He got in the car and
left.

"Did you have supper?" Jake asked. We said no.

"Come on in." He ordered.

The cabin was dark and warm. It consisted of a big room with a kitchen to
one side, and a single bedroom.  It did have indoor plumbing. There was no
television, but a large modern stereo system sat to one side. It had a cd
player, which was new at that time.

Jake told us to stick our stuff in the bedroom and take a seat until dinner
was ready.  We obeyed. He was busy cooking and we looked at his collection
of records and CD's.  It was all Beethoven, Mozart, Verdi, Puccini and
Wagner. The awful truth dawned on us. He liked Classical music.

We were starved, and dinner was great. It was some sort of a stew, with
lots of meat, venison. At least we wouldn't starve.

Out of the blue he said. " We will work tomorrow some, but I quit at noon."

"What do you do?" I asked.

"Lumber for money, garden for fun." Jake said.

You can help cleaning up." He told us.

He sat down, put a CD in the stereo and watched us cleanup.

"Where do we sleep? Wilbur asked.

"Only one bed. Or the floor. Cold on the floor." He said.

He was content listening to the music. We were ready to try to make a break
for it.  "Nearest town is fifteen miles away." He said as if reading our
minds.  "It gets really cold at night here in the mountains."

Will and I sat on a settee and were dozing off. The quiet music, big dinner
and lack of conversation was relaxing.

"Bed time!" He woke us with a jolt. "To the showers, then to bed." The room
was cold now, it wasn't heated. We went to the bedroom. "Strip!" He
ordered. "Into the shower!"  We went in the bathroom and found there was no
shower.

"Through the door!" he ordered from behind us. There was a door we hadn't
seen. I opened it and a brand new modern tile shower greeted us. It was big
enough for six or seven people, with a marble seat on two sides. We walked
in and the door shut behind us. Jake was there, naked.

I knew he was hairy, but I hadn't guessed that hairy. I at first couldn't
figure out what was hanging from where his cock should have been.

"God damn! That's the biggest cock I've ever seen in my life!" Wilbur
said. We both stared, open mouthed. Completely soft it hung eight inches
and look as if it had the diameter of a beer can. A bit lower were two
balls, encased in a low hanging pouch.

"It's not how big you are but how you make them big." Jake said, turning on
the water.  He took a long look at our cocks and said, "At least you boys
aren't an embarrassment in that department." Flipping on a switch, he
turned on a steam machine.

After about ten minutes of the steam, he turned it off, told us to shower
again. We did, then we dried off.

"Ok boys, haul ass into the bed or you will freeze your balls off." He told
up. We did and he joined us, three naked guys in a king sized bed. I didn't
know what to expect next. The next thing I knew, it was seven in the
morning.  Jake cooked breakfast. After we ate, we went out and to a large
garden and he had us set some plants. The cold morning turned into a hot
midday. We stripped off our shirts.  Jake left us alone for a while.

"What in hell is going on here?" Wilbur asked.

"I don't know.  I think we should lie low and figure out the lay of the
land." I said. "He seems like a strange man."

"I don't think he's a mass murderer." Will said. "He had his chance last
night."

"And he doesn't want out ass." I said. "He had that chance too." Uncle Jake
returned. It turned out that we were wrong. He didn't want our ass, but he
was willing to take it if it was offered. He made sandwiches for lunch and
we went out and wandered through the woods. The warm sun felt great on our
bodies.

After a several hours we returned and found him listening to the
Metropolitan opera on the radio. He took one look at us and said. "Shit
boys, your burned!"

We hadn't been in the sun that year, and the cool air deceived us. We were
sunburned.  It's not that bad." Wilbur said.

"Believe me, it's going to be bad." Jake said. "Let's see what we can
do. Your just like my father, you burn as soon as you see the sun."

We told him not to worry, that we knew what we were doing.  I was surprised
at being babied by this big bear of a man.  We sat on the porch while he
listened to the remainder of the opera.

When he called us for dinner reality struck.  I felt as if my skin had been
cooked and was going to be ripped of if anything touched it.  We tried not
to show that everything hurt, but Jake looked at us with an amused air. He
knew better.

After dinner he turned on the stereo again, and we tried to sit down
without having our burned back come in contact with any furniture. After a
while he said, "Time for a shower and some nice hot steam!" We would have
turned white if we had not been so burned. He burst out laughing.

"Enough being brave boys! Lets strip down and let me see what I can do!" In
the shower he turned on the water a lukewarm level and that helped some. He
then got some white vinegar and coated our backs with it. It was as if you
turned off the pain. "It won't last for long, but it will help some."

"It will be cool tonight, but that won't bother you!" He gave us some
aspirin and got us into the bed. We slept surprisingly well. I woke just
before dawn with a raging hard on. I usually jerked off and then took a
piss, but not with a Uncle lying next to me.

I rose to get up and the sunburn made itself apparent. I almost cried in
pain. I then tried to cover my erection with the sheet, but my arm hurt too
much.

Two blue eyes looked at me from a bearded face. "You've gt yourself a
problem there don't you boy?" Jake asked. "Do you want to take a piss or
shoot off?"

"I don't know." I stammered.

"Which would you like the best?" He asked. I glanced at my hard cock. He
reached a paw over and stroked it. I let out a sigh of satisfaction. "How
do you like it? Slow or fast?"

"What ever you like." I said. Wilbur was up now and watching. He too had an
erection. Uncle Jake seemed unconcerned.

"Let's see how close you are." He said and he took his finger and touched
my piss slit. "Pre cum already.  Your getting ripe."  He reached over me
and touched Wilbur's cock. "You've got a ways to go.  Do you guys jerk off
together?"He asked.

"Once and a while." Wilbur answered. "On a slow night. When we have no
date."

"And how often is that?" He asked.

"Never more than seven times a week." I said, guessing that frankness might
be appreciated.

"The men in our family have always had a way with the women!" He laughed.
"It's a shame because we're a well endowed group of fuckers! A waste of
cock!" He was so relaxed as he played with my cock that I relaxed some and
began to enjoy it. He toyed with my balls some too.

"Never got your Aunt Alice to understand that a cock is a toy, not just a
tool. She wanted babies, but when she discovered she couldn't have any, she
lost all interest."

"Did you ever find anyone to play with your .  . .  Toy?" Wilbur asked.

"Sure did!  And its been getting better and better as I get older." Jake
said. He smeared some of the stuff that was oozing from my cock all over
the head and then played with the area that connected the foreskin to the
head. It felt great. I had discovered that spot all on my own several years
before, but was surprised when my Uncle knew where it was. My cock
twitched, and he gave it some deep strokes and I shot all over the place.

"I see you shoot the family load too. We've got great baby makers." he said
as he cupped my balls.  Now lets do the other one. Are you Clyde?"

"No, Wilbur." My brother said as Jake took control of his cock. It only
took three or four strokes to get Wilbur off.

"You were ready after all!" Uncle Jake said.

"Are you ready?" I asked, shocked that I was so forward.

"Let me see." Jake pulled back the covers and exposed his spectacular cock
in full erection.

"Holy shit!" Wilbur and I said in unison. I was baseball bat like.

"Do you want to watch me pop it, or would you like to help?" Jake
asked. Wilbur rolled out of bed and came over to the other side of our
uncle. He touched it delicately.

"Grab it and stroke it boy!" Jake said. "It feels just as good to me as
yours does to you." Wilbur did it. I touched it too, forgetting the pain of
the sunburn in the heat of the moment. There was room for both our hands on
the shaft.  I felt it twitch and then it exploded. White cum everywhere.
It was on Jake me and Wilbur. I spread it into the hair on my chest.

Jake noticed this. "That's right, Clyde. Don't be afraid to get into it."

After he finished shooting he told us to take a shower, and he got more
white vinegar.  As he spread it on our backs Wilbur sighed.

"That felt great Uncle Jake. Have you done that before?"

"Sure many times. What have you boys been doing for fun? Have you screwed a
girl?"

"Nope, never tried." Wilbur said. "Never even got close."

"Ever blown a guy?" Jake asked. "Sucked cock or fucked a guy?"

"Is that better than what we just did? I thought it would be .  .  . ?"

"Disgusting?" Jake supplied the missing word.

"Yes."I said.

"Boys. My parents, your great grandparents, did everything they could to
make think that any thing you enjoyed was bad for you and would send you
straight to hell. That included drinking, dancing and, most of all,
anything sexual." Jake said. They didn't like sex between men and women,
men and their buddies, and tended to disapprove of it in farm animals."

"It's bad for a farmer to be opposed to procreation! He wasn't a good
farmer.  It's a damn stupid man who is all alone and can't find any way to
amuse himself! And its sad when a group a guys cant do anything but watch
TV and feel guilty about having a cock that can give them more pleasure
that any other part of their body."

"The bible says .  .  ." Wilbur started to repeat a Sunday School lesson.

"The only part of the cock the Bible is interested is the foreskin! And
that was only when it was chopped off. The Bible isn't much interested in
sex. Jesus never said anything. Paul didn't like it for any reason. If
these bible thumpers were so sincere about the book where are the Baptist
monks? Where are the born again Church of God in Holiness, Apostolic,
Evangelistic Nuns!"

"Do unto others! That's the rule. I never do unto others what I won't let
them do to me. And I never use God as a fund raising technique!" Jake got
excited and he slapped me on the bak. I yelped in pain.

"Sorry Wilbur. I got carried away." Jake said.

"It's Clyde." I said.

"Uncle Jake.  Can you tell me what sort of things you like to have done
unto you?" Wilbur said. "We might be able to work something out."  I knew
that Wilbur and I often thought alike, but it is a shock when you are
thinking exactly the same thing.

Jake laughed. "I bet we could work something out. I bet we could!"