Date: Tue, 27 Jul 2004 20:02:31 -0700 (PDT)
From: Mickey S <njmcmick@yahoo.com>
Subject: Billy and Danny II, Chapter 22

This is a story of love between two young men. If you are under age, or
live in an area where reading stories that include sex between males is
illegal, or if you're not into this type of story, please leave. The story
began in 1969. While the characters and their story are completely
fictional, it is set at places that are real and is told against a backdrop
of some real events. This was a time when all sex was safe. It isn't now,
so please respect yourself and others enough to always play safe.

I would like to thank all of those who have written to me with comments,
suggestions and encouragement, especially my fellow writers in the Nifty
Six. The author retains all rights.  No reproductions are allowed without
the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at NJMcMick@yahoo.com.

September 1973

Billy

The first few days at school before the students started was a chance to
reacquaint myself with the layout of the building and some of the teachers
and get a little bit organized. It felt so strange being back at Central
High and it was hard to get used to the idea that I was the teacher now,
not the student. I had lunch with Mrs. Watson the first day.

"You certainly have grown up, William. It's almost like you're a different
person. You used to be so angry all the time. You always had a chip on your
shoulder but you seem happy now."

"I am happy, Mrs. Watson. I've learned to live with myself and the world
around me. My life is good."

"You've got to stop calling me Mrs. Watson, William. We're colleagues now,
not teacher and student. Please call me June."

"I'll try but it just doesn't seem right. You might as well call me
Billy. I stopped insisting on William long ago."

"That's another change. You were always one for demanding respect."

"I still insist on respect but back then I felt like I had to prove myself
all the time. I don't have to prove anything to anyone now. I know who I am
and that's all that matters."

"You have changed. Your parents must be so proud of you."

I had expected a comment like that sooner or later and had decided to try
to be at least partly honest in my answer.

"Actually, Mrs., uh, June, I'm not in contact with my parents. We had a
falling out quite a while back and don't speak any longer."

"That's a shame, Billy. It must be hard for you to be out on your own but
you seem to be doing all right."

"I get by, June. Like I said, my life is good."

"Do you have a girlfriend, someone who cares about you?"

Another expected question, one that I had to be more careful answering.

"No, no girlfriend, but there are good people in my life who care about
me."

"Well, I know a couple of nice young single women who I'm sure would love
to go out with a handsome bright young man like you. If you're interested,
I could arrange something."

"Thanks for the offer, June, but I prefer to take care of my own love
life."

June didn't take offense and didn't push the issue. Over the next couple of
weeks I came to rely on her for advice on everything to do with the
school. She became my unofficial advisor and my friend. Our conversations
mostly revolved around the school and teaching and though she tried to find
out a little about my personal life I didn't open up much. I told her I
lived in Morristown and had a roommate and that was about it. I wasn't sure
how she'd react to my being gay and I decided to keep it to myself, for a
while, at least.

I was still luckier than Danny, though. His principal sounded like a real
prick. It's hard to imagine that anyone could think of Danny as immoral and
a poor role model. He's the sweetest most decent guy I've ever known. I may
be a little prejudiced on that, though.

The kids were a little rowdier and more disrespectful than I remembered and
that's something coming from me. I was the master at bad behavior and
disrespect just a few years back. I had to get back into my street punk
persona a bit to keep order in the classroom. Once the kids learned I
wouldn't take any shit from them they didn't cause any trouble, not much
anyway. After a couple of weeks I began to feel a little comfortable in my
new role.

My commute wasn't too bad. The train took about half an hour and then I had
a mile walk to school through the neighborhood I had grown up in. It hadn't
changed much since I left though it was showing more signs of neglect. The
area been great when I was in high school but after the riots it really
started to slide. Because of the commute I had to leave earlier than Danny
in the morning and got home later in the afternoon. I used the time on the
train to read or work on my lesson plans. In bad weather I caught a cab to
school from the Broad Street station and usually I could hitch a ride back
in the afternoon with another teacher. In Morristown Danny picked me up at
the train station when it rained but normally I walked home. Soon we were
both falling into a routine, one that I knew would probably have to be
adjusted a bit once Lucy had the baby.

Friday afternoon I got home from the train station to find the house empty
and Lucy's note in the kitchen. I called for a cab and ran upstairs to
change out of my school clothes. The taxi was waiting at the curb by the
time I was ready. At the front desk I was directed up to the maternity
floor where I found Aunt Connie in the waiting room.

"Any news yet?"

"No, Billy. They took Lucy into delivery about two hours ago but these
things can take a long time. Better make yourself comfortable."

I grabbed a magazine and tried to read but I was too excited and
nervous. Fortunately I didn't have too long to wait. In about twenty
minutes Danny came walking through the door with a big grin on his face. He
just stood there smiling.

"Well? Aren't you going to tell us?"

"Oh yeah, I knew I came out here for something. It's a boy!"

"How is the baby? How is Lucy?"

"There's both fine, Aunt Connie. We can go see them in a few minutes. Man,
delivery is a lot harder than I expected. I don't know how women do
it. Lucy was great, though. I'm just glad it's over."

"I'm sure she is too, Danny."

We all went in to see Lucy and the baby. He was so beautiful. I couldn't
take my eyes off him the whole time we were in Lucy's room. I don't just
mean he was physically beautiful. All babies are, or so they say. Besides,
with parents like Danny and Lucy he couldn't help it. But realizing that he
was the product of the two people I love most in the world made me love him
so much. I nearly cried when Danny insisted Tyler have my name as his
middle name.

We didn't stay very long. Both Lucy and Danny were exhausted and of course
the baby slept through everything. I drove Danny home and we hugged and
kissed Aunt Connie good night in the yard, then went into the house. Danny
heated up some soup and opened a bottle of wine while I went into the
living room to light a fire in the fireplace. It wasn't cold but we were
both feeling mellow and wanted to cuddle. After we ate we took our glasses
and the bottle with us, threw lots of pillows onto the floor in front of
the fireplace and got comfortable.

We sipped our wine and I held Danny in my arms. We didn't talk much, but
nestled together and watched the fire. Life just couldn't get any better. I
was a little hesitant to think that because a couple of times in the past I
felt that good and then bad things happened. But I just knew we were on the
right track now.

"I didn't think it was possible Danny, but now that I look at you and think
of you as a father, you're even sexier than ever. You are so hot right
now. I want to make love to the new daddy."

"And I want you to, Billy, but lets make it slow and tender, not
athletic. I'm so tired I don't think I have the energy to move much."

"Any way you want it, baby."

Danny just lay back against the pillows and I slowly undressed him. I
stripped my clothes off and just cuddled with him for a while. My dick
wasn't in the mood for just cuddling, though. It had been rock hard ever
since we lay down on the floor and I gently pressed it against Danny's
hip. As tired as he was his cock quickly responded. I rolled over on top of
him and put my right hand under the top of his back and my left hand behind
his head and kissed him. I slowly ground my hips into his and our dicks
rubbed against each other. After a while I lifted up, slid down a bit until
my cock was between his thighs and then pressed down onto him again. I
thrust my hips forward a bit until the head of my dick was poking him just
behind his balls. We resumed kissing and I humped him lightly, my hard rod
rubbing up and down his crack over his hole. Danny pushed back against me.

"Do it, Billy. Make love to me, please," he said breathlessly.

I hesitated. Damn! The lube was in the bedroom, all the way upstairs at the
back of the house. I thought for a second.

"Hold that thought, Dan. I'll be right back."

I jumped up, ran into the kitchen and opened the pantry, grabbed a small
bottle of olive oil and a small towel and went back into the living room. I
put the towel under Danny's butt and lifted his legs up over my
shoulders. I carefully poured a little of the oil onto my cock which had
started to soften from all of the running around. A few strokes to spread
the oil all over it and I was hard as steel again. I applied a little to
his pucker with my fingers. He immediately relaxed at my touch and I slid
first one then two fingers inside. I just fingered him for a couple of
minutes, rubbing his prostate with my fingertips, stroking my own meat with
the other hand. Danny moaned and looked at me through half-closed eyes.

"C'mon, Billy. That feels great but I need more than your fingers in me. Do
me."

I pulled out my fingers and lined my dick up with his relaxed pucker, then
leaned into him. It slid in all the way in one long slow motion. When I was
completely buried in him I pulled his legs down and wrapped them around my
waist, then leaned over and kissed him again.

I pulled back and slowly began pumping in and out of Danny. He thrust his
hips slightly to meet me each time. We stared into each other's eyes as we
fucked, a slight smile on both our mouths. At times like this I think we go
into a kind of trance together, getting off on our love even more than on
the sexual activity. I gradually increased our speed and as I approached
the point where I knew it wouldn't be long for me I grabbed Danny's dick in
my fist and began pumping it. I came first but midway through my orgasm
Danny's dick exploded all over his chest and stomach. I squeezed the last
drop out of his cock and then lay down on him and kissed him again. I
slipped out of him while we were kissing.

"That was great, Billy. I love you so much."

"No more than I love you, baby. You're the best."

We just lay there as the fire burned itself out. At some point we fell
asleep because I woke up in the middle of the night nestled with Danny
among the pillows. I shook him gently. He half-awoke and I got him onto his
feet and helped him upstairs where we both fell into bed and were back
asleep in seconds.

October 1973

Mark

Life sucks. By the time school started I had just about given up on
everything. I was getting high every day. I had to have Terry get some
grass for me to smoke on a regular basis. His special stuff made me too
horny and I didn't want that all day every day. I just wanted to get high
and escape. My schoolwork suffered, as did my performance at The
Restaurant. I guess I cared a little because if I didn't I'd just lie in
bed smoking all day. At least I was going through the motions, going to
class, completing assignments, passing tests. At work I made sure I
provided good enough service so that I didn't get fired but I think the
only guys who left me good tips anymore were ones who had had me at the
baths or who hoped to.

Terry came over once a week and fucked my brains out with that huge dick of
his. Sometimes he brought a friend or two. When it was just him Peter
joined in and we had a good three-way. When he brought other guys Peter
just liked to watch. He really got off on watching me get fucked. I got off
on getting fucked too but it didn't matter to me whether it was one guy or
three. A dick was a dick and when I was high I just wanted one up my
ass. As much as I loved the sex and found getting fucked by strangers to be
kind of exciting there were times when even through the smoky haze I wished
that it was just Peter and me. But as I said I liked the sex and Peter
loved what we were doing so what the hell.

I must not have been totally emotionally dead because I did get excited
when Billy called to tell me about the baby. A few days later Peter and I
went out to Morristown to see him. Tyler was a beautiful, healthy baby and
Billy, Danny and Lucy were so happy but I started getting depressed almost
as soon as we got there. Why were they able to move on with their lives and
I wasn't? What was wrong with me? At least Peter and I hadn't smoked before
we got there so I was pretty much in control and didn't have to worry about
embarrassing myself in front of them. I still couldn't get over the way I'd
treated Danny last spring. He never mentioned it and treated me the same as
ever but I just couldn't forgive myself. What did it say about the kind of
person I was that I would do that to my friend?

Afterward all I could think about was what a loser I was, how fucked up my
life was.

One Friday night Peter met me after work. I had started working an extra
night each week since there wasn't any more money coming from my
parents. We went out for a few drinks and then headed over to the Club
Baths. Peter pulled a fat joint out of his pocket.

"Terry says this is treated with something really special. He only gave me
one but said it would be all we needed."

We took the less crowded streets as we crossed the Village, discreetly
passing the joint back and forth. By the time we got to the baths I was
more than a little buzzed. We undressed, put our clothes in our lockers,
and started working our way up to the orgy room. I was completely out it
when we got there, flying higher than I could ever remember. I'd taken the
precaution of lubing up my butt at the locker. When we went back to a guy's
room he usually had lube but for action in the orgy room I didn't like
depending on spit as the only lube.

There were two bunks pulled together near the middle of the room that were
empty so I lay down on one on my stomach and Peter climbed on top of me. He
slid his hard cock up and down my crack for a while, teasing me and lubing
himself up at the same time. When I started begging him to fuck me he put
his head against my hole and pushed, burying himself deep inside me. He
began fucking and a couple of guys stopped to watch. After Peter came in me
he rolled off onto the bunk next to me and another guy took his
place. Peter held the guy's dick and directed it into me. He began
thrusting, quite a bit rougher than Peter had but I didn't mind. I was high
and I was getting fucked and that was all that mattered. A third guy
followed him and another one after that. Peter was just lying there
watching, groping the guys to keep them hard, directing the action. I was
so high that while I loved the physical sensations I felt like I wasn't
really a part of what was going on, like I was on the next bunk with Peter
watching some guy getting gang banged.

I must have dozed off but when I awoke the guy was still pumping into
me. My hole was burning and very sore. I guessed the lube must have been
pretty much used up by then. The guy came with a couple of hard thrusts and
pulled out. Another tried to take his place but I pushed him away, turned
onto my side and faced Peter who was also asleep. I shook his shoulder
lightly and he opened his eyes.

"Go to sleep, babe. You must be worn out."

"I want to go home, Peter. Let's get out of here."

"Take a nap first. You've earned it. Maybe you'll want some more when you
wake up."

"I've had enough, Peter. I want to go."

"Go ahead then. I'm not ready to go. I'm gonna sleep a little bit more."

"I don't want to leave you here, Peter. Let's go. You can sleep at home."

"Just go, babe. You were great tonight. See you in a little while."

He closed his eyes and was asleep in a second. I went down to the locker
and got dressed. My ass was hurting more than ever before and I couldn't
figure out why. When I stepped out the door onto First Avenue I got the
answer. It was broad daylight. I looked at my watch and saw that it was
after eight. No wonder. I'd been fucked for over six hours. That last guy
wasn't the one who was fucking me when I fell asleep. God knows how many
guys had me while I was out. I rushed home, undressed and sat on the
toilet, expelling what felt like a gallon of cum. Then I got into the
shower. I just felt so dirty. I scrubbed myself over and over but it didn't
help.

I sat in front of the mirror in the bedroom and stared at the guy in
there. How many guys had fucked me while I was unconscious? What did they
do to me? And what was Peter doing while it was happening? Was he watching,
getting off on the scene? Or had he passed out too, leaving me unprotected,
vulnerable to whatever those guys wanted to do, letting complete strangers
use me? He said I'd been great. What was that supposed to mean?

I had to get away from there. I needed time to think. My life was going
down the drain and there seemed to be no stopping it. I knew I didn't want
to see Peter just then. Somehow whenever I had my doubts about what I was
doing or I didn't like the way things were going he calmed me down and made
me think everything was all right but I didn't want to be calmed down about
this any more. Everything was not all right. But what was I gonna do? Where
could I go?

My first thought was Billy and Danny but I hesitated. How could I tell them
about this? What would they think of me? Then I thought back to that day
they found me bleeding on their bathroom door. I was a complete stranger to
them and yet they had been so supportive, so kind. They'd been like that
ever since. They'd never judged me and had always been there for me. I
didn't deserve friends like them but I really needed them now. I wrote
Peter a quick note saying that I needed time to think things out and didn't
know when I'd be back. Then I got dressed and walked to the PATH station. I
wasn't sure I could tell the guys all of the shit I'd been doing but I knew
I needed to try.

Danny

Everything was working out great with Tyler, the first few weeks
anyway. Billy and I helped out as much as we could when we were home. We'd
change the diapers and wash him and fuss over him. He slept most of the
time and usually only woke up once during the night. One or both of us
would get up when he did but since Lucy was breast-feeding she also had to
get up when he was hungry. On the weekends we tried to give her as much of
a break as possible. She wasn't supposed to go out much right after the
delivery but she'd go next door to visit with Aunt Connie and after the
first couple of weeks they'd do some shopping or go out to lunch. Billy and
I stayed home with Tyler, did our schoolwork, and took care of things
around the house. Sometimes we just stared at him, amazed at the miracle of
life.

Late Saturday morning Lucy went over to Aunt Connie's. They were going out
to lunch and then were going to catch a movie. Lucy had used her breast
pump to leave a bottle of milk in the refrigerator for Tyler when he got
hungry. Billy and I were in the kitchen working on lesson plans when the
doorbell rang. I jumped up and ran to get the door before the bell rang
again. I didn't want it to wake up Tyler. Mark was standing at the door,
looking like hell. I grabbed him and hugged him.

"What a surprise! It's so good to see you. Where's Peter?"

"He's back in the city. I wanted to come out on my own to see you guys and
talk. I really miss you."

"We miss you, too. Come into the kitchen. Billy and I were just doing some
work for school."

Billy and I put our papers away and took Tyler and Mark into the
sunroom. Ty was sleeping (when wasn't he?) so Mark only spent a minute
admiring him. He seemed a little ill at ease and wasn't looking either of
us in the eye.

"So what's bothering you, Mark?"

"Am I that obvious, Billy? I guess I am. I'm so unhappy, guys, and I don't
even know where to begin. My life is totally screwed up."

"It's been pretty clear to both of us that you haven't been handling things
well lately, Mark. We've been worried about you, especially since you
started avoiding us. I hope you know I'm not mad at you for last spring."

"I know, Danny, though you should be. I was a real ass. But that's what I
mean. I just don't know what I'm doing lately, or, what's worse, why I'm
doing things. It's like I'm totally out of control."

"I know you're been getting high way too much the past year or so,
Mark. Sometimes I feel guilty about that because I gave you my Valium last
year. That seems to have started you on the wrong track."

"Oh God, it's not your fault, Danny. Please don't think that. You and Billy
have always been great to me. I take full responsibility for the way I've
fucked things up. It just hurt so bad when my Dad told me about Brad. I
love him so much, I have all my life. I really depended on him loving me
back. It hurts so to not have him in my life, to know that someone so
wonderful is gone."

"We know how you feel, though not to the same extent, of course. With the
ceasefires that have been signed this year Danny and I were hoping we'd all
get more information about Brad but apparently not much has really changed
over there. Our troops are still there even though the South Vietnamese are
doing the fighting now. The war still goes on."

"Maybe it's the lack of finality that's getting to me. I know there was
never much hope and as time goes on there is less and less but not knowing
for sure just eats away at me. I can't handle reality so I run away from
it."

"The problem with doing that is that when you come down from your high the
world is still there, Mark. You can't run away forever."

"I know, Danny. And getting high just makes things worse because then I do
things I don't want to do, or maybe I do want to do them and that scares me
even more. I just don't know who I am anymore."

"What kinds of things are you talking about? You mean like at our party
last May?"

"Something like that but much worse. I don't even know if I can tell you
guys about it, Billy."

"You can tell us anything, Mark. You should know by now that Danny and I
love you and will always be there for you. Don't be afraid of us giving up
on you."

Mark slowly and hesitatingly began to tell us about his and Peter's
adventures at the baths and at home with Terry and his friends. Billy and I
had thought that they were doing something along those lines but still I
was shocked at the extent. Lots of guys we've met through the Alliance and
at The Restaurant have different kinds of open relationships and while that
would never be something that Billy or I wanted it seemed to work okay for
them, though better for some than others. I long ago realized that every
couple has to decide what they want and as long as they're honest with each
other and are both agreeable it's no one else's business what they do. But
this sounded more like Peter than Mark. Nothing Peter did would surprise me
after that scene in Ft. Lauderdale but Mark had always seemed to want
monogamy. I wasn't trying to judge him but I was absolutely horrified when
Mark told us about the night before at the baths.

"You could have been badly hurt, Mark. Lots of guys are into really kinky
things and you were defenseless, just lying there waiting to be used."

"I know, Danny. At first I thought I had only dozed off for a couple of
minutes and that Peter was keeping an eye on me. When I realized I had
probably been out a few hours and so had Peter it really scared me. I've
become pretty used to casual sex but I don't even know who did me last
night or how many of them there were. I always trusted Peter to be there
for me and he wasn't so I'm pretty shook up by the whole thing."

"Yeah, you were really taking a chance, Mark. You have to decide what you
want. If you really want to have an open relationship and do threesomes
with Peter then do it. But if you have to get stoned out of your head to do
it I think there's a problem."

"I know, Billy. I've always fantasized about a monogamous relationship like
you and Danny have, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy having sex
with all these guys. There's something exciting about being with a new guy,
with not knowing exactly how things are going to be. You must remember what
it was like before you met each other."

"Actually, we'd never been with anyone else before we met. Mark. Billy and
I were both virgins. We thought you knew that."

"Shit! I didn't realize that. You're making me feel like even more of a
slut now. You mean neither of you has ever done it with another guy? Aren't
you ever attracted to other guys? Don't you ever wonder what it would be
like?"

"Sure, we both notice hot guys, Mark. Danny and I point them out to each
other all the time, though we often don't agree on who we think is hot. And
now and then I see a hot little ass and think, "Damn, I'd like to get in
there,' but it's just a passing thought, not a real desire."

"Yeah, Billy and I have never had just sex. We were in love with each other
before we ever did anything so we automatically link sex with love in our
minds. For either of us to seriously want to have sex with somebody else
would be like wanting to be in love with somebody else and there's no way
either of us would even think that."

"We realize that sex can be fun all by itself but that's just not a part of
our experience. That's great if it works for others but it just isn't
something I could get into. I've got the best with Danny. You can't improve
on that."

"You see, that's what I want, too, but you guys are so perfect I feel like
I can't come close."

"We're not perfect, Mark. We're a great match but all relationships need
work and attention. Billy and I try to never take each other for
granted. After a while together that can happen so you have to stay on your
toes. We talk to each other and listen to each other, but all the
communication in the world wouldn't help if we didn't agree on the basics
of what we want."

"I know and that's my problem. Peter seems so sure of what he wants but I'm
not sure if that's what I want. I don't even know what I want. I never
think about sex with anyone else unless I'm smoking but then since I do
enjoy it so much when I'm high I keep thinking that I must want it. Maybe I
just can't admit it, even to myself, unless I get stoned. Or maybe I just
like sex and, though I'd prefer it to be only with Peter, when I get high I
give in to whatever he wants. I just don't know."

"Then your first priority is to figure out what you want, Mark. And it's
got to be something that can make you happy when you're not high because
you can't spend your life stoned."

"I know, Billy. I've already decided I'm gonna stop smoking for a while so
I can think straight but as much as I hate the idea I think I need some
time away from Peter, too. He means well but I give in to him too easily. I
need to think this through on my own. Unfortunately, I can't go home to my
parents."

"We'd love to have you stay with us but Lucy is in the guestroom and things
are a little crazy here with Tyler. You wouldn't get much thinking or
studying done in this house."

"Hey, Billy, how about our old apartment? He'd be right next door but he'd
also have peace and quiet."

"That's a great idea, Danny. I'm sure Aunt Connie wouldn't mind. We'll ask
her when she and Lucy get home. In the meantime, why don't you call Peter,
Mark? And Danny, from the way Tyler's squirming I think his diaper need
attention. He's probably hungry, too, so I'll go warm up his bottle."

"How come I always get the dirty work?"

"Because you're the daddy, white boy."