Date: Sun, 18 Sep 2005 15:16:31 -0400
From: S N <sum1plezzcall_911@hotmail.com>
Subject: Heavens_Just_A_Sin_Away, Chapter 10

Disclaimer: This is a FICTIONAL story describing the love triangle of a
teenage boy. If you are not over 18 years of age, or if you find this type
of story offensive, or viewing this material is illegal where you are, then
refrain from reading it. The story consists of lust, passion, teenage
romance, interracial, love and all the rest of the good stuff in that
order... Prepare for sin

Comments welcome to sum1plezzCall_911@hotmail.com

Chapter 10, Sin: Avarice.
~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

	I pictured him jumping towards me.

	He took three steps before he jumped, but once he jumped I knew for sure
that my life was over.  I could feel the pain surging through my body!

	I could feel my life being drained, thoroughly.  It was an outer-body
experience.  I didn't have a chance to scream.  I felt the blade withdraw
and I felt it being thrust back in.  He repeated this awkward thrusting
until I counted 20 stab wounds all over my body.

	"Lust," he said and repeated it.

	He repeated it almost like an echo.  He was trying to show me the power in
lust.  He was trying to show me the horrible thing that it could cause.  As
I died, he looked in my eyes and he had this complex look of desire in it
that I feared.  Even in my last breath I could only worry about the meaning
behind this emotion called lust.


..................................................................................................................

	Of course, that wasn't really how it happened.

	It happened, quite differently in fact, but my mind was already playing out
that scenario when I saw Byron standing in my bedroom with the switchblade
in his hand.

	I had backed away from Byron, who had the switchblade in his hand as he
stood over me in the middle of the night.  I was wondering if it was
something that I had done to bring forward this passion of lust within him.
I felt a guilt that was so deep that my stomach turned.  Had I led him on in
any way? I had never been so afraid as I was at this moment.  My heart had
swiftly ducked under my bed, but my body was a little slow.  My legs felt
heavy and my response to everything seemed sluggish.

	"Byron...please..."

	It was weird.  Byron looked at me with this look of total confusion.  I
couldn't keep my eyes off the switchblade that he had.  I should have moved.
  I should have been struggling.

	"You have no idea how sorry I am for approaching you in the alley that
way..."

	He had come here to kill me and yet he was apologizing?  It was weird and
yet there was this fear in Byron's eyes that he wasn't trying to hide.  He
was letting me know that he was so afraid.

	I was fucking afraid too, "How did you get in here?"

	"I found out where you live by following you.  As for getting in here, I
just paid off that lady downstairs.  Her name is Nicole, I believe."

	Ms. Nicole!  That greedy bitch!  I knew she didn't give a shit about me.
She was only letting me live here because my uncle was paying her.  She
didn't give a fuck about my welfare.  I mean: she let strange people in my
room for a fucking price!  I was fucking pissed, but I was even more afraid
then anything at the moment.

	"What is the blade for?"

	He looked at it with this fascination as though he was looking at a piece
of art.  It was a regular blade that was ugly really.  Yet the edge was so
beautiful.  It had a sharp edge that had a simple perfection, which was
difficult to comprehend.  He waved the blade to the light, so that a small
reflection came on it.  He was so focused on this blade that I knew that I
could have taken off.  I could have ran...but I didn't...

	"You have to forgive me or..."

	I recognized his confused look and then challenged him, "You'll kill me?"

	He didn't seem to be that type.  I hadn't believed it for a moment.  I had
seen a little bit of my own characteristics in his desperation to get
someone he felt that he wanted.  He was trying to get someone he felt he
needed.

	"Never!" he said, a little disgusted at the thought, "I'll never hurt you.
Haven't you been listening to me? Don't you know how much I love you?  I
can't live with you being mad at me.  I regret what I did so much.  Don't
you understand that?  I came here to prove it to you..."

	I saw him put the blade to his own wrist.

	"No! Stop!"

	I saw the blade enter Byron's wrist slowly.  He pushed it downward until
blood had begun to pour.  I could see the vein that he was trying to cut
from all the way across the room.  My eyes were tearing up immediately.  I
had never felt like this.

	He turned to me, stopping.  He had taken notice my tears.  He was crying
too now.  I wondered if it was from the pain that he now had inserted a
blade into his wrist and was now about to cut across a vein.  His eyes had
turned to the sudden extreme knocking on the door, which I was sure was
coming from T-Boy.

	"Don't let them in!"  Byron demanded loudly and then calmly added,
"Please..."

	I looked at him.  Letting T-Boy in would have gone one of two ways.  I knew
that I could hold Byron down while T-Boy went to call for help.  That would
stop Byron from hurting himself.  Then I thought what if Byron hurt himself
in the time it took me to go open the door and explain to T-Boy what was
going on.  That was the reason that I froze in an instant despite T-Boy's
loud knocks at the door.

	"Syn, what's wrong? Open the door!"

	The voice belonged to T-Boy.  He was banging really hard.

	"No," I explained, trying to sound calm, "I was just on the phone! I'm
okay! I'll talk to you later!"

	"Syn, can you just open the door? I got a bad feeling about something."

	"T-Boy, I'm fine.  Please. I'll talk to you tomorrow about what happened
between us earlier."

	It was the only thing I could think of that might take T-Boy's mind off of
his 'bad feeling'.  I hoped he also knew what I meant by saying that.  I
didn't even want to just say that I was going to talk to him tomorrow about
us being a couple in front Byron.  Byron's state could be seen in the way
that he was tearing quietly in the darkness of my room with his heavy
breathing sounding like a gusting wind.  I didn't want to add anything to
his burning fire.  I silently prayed that T-Boy would be content in talking
to me tomorrow about being together and that he wouldn't be compelled to
come in.

	T-Boy's voice trailed away, "Ok, I'll talk to you tomorrow...baby."

	Shit! I looked over at Byron.  He had heard T-Boy call me baby.  I could
feel his face squirm up as though I'd gone up to him and sliced his wrists
myself. Well...at least T-Boy was gone.

	"I was going to tell you..." I lied.

	He was crying really hard.  He looked at the blade and all of a sudden he
flung it away as though finally coming to his senses about exactly what he
was doing.  He dropped to a sitting position on the floor, facing the wall.
He was still crying though, now harder then before.  Now he was whining and
tearing up like a little boy.  My tears had dried, but my eyes still felt
moist from seeing him in such a low position.

	I approached him slowly, so that I wouldn't startle him. He hid his face
underneath his hands, as though he didn't want me to see his tears. I put my
hand on his moist back that was full of sweat (probably from being nervous)
and I rubbed it in a sympathetic manner.  I didn't know what to say.  I knew
I had to say something though.  I had to somehow make him feel better.

	"I should have known," he said in a sort of displaced tone,  "A guy like
you would never even look my way."

	"That's bullshit!"  I explained, still trying to comfort him and yet
telling the truth,  "You have sex appeal unlike any other guy that I know.
You have such an ideal look.  Your body is twice as ripped as mine.  You
look perfect."

	I was trying to seem as though I wasn't hitting on him because I wasn't.
The way I had said it was as though I was stating facts.  These were
internationally understood facts.  Byron was beautiful.  There was no one
who could deny that Byron had a movie star face.  Some people may say that
his look was an imitation of some Vin Diesel-like sex appeal, but
none-the-less he was beautiful.

	"Yeah, but I have no character," he explained, turning to me, "I mean, when
I walk in a room, people just see a regular hot guy.  When they look at you,
they see this outspoken, brutally honest, rude-at-times revolutionist who
has broken the rose-tinted glasses of modern day society."

	I laughed, "Um...I don't know about all that."

	It was a nice thing to say but I didn't think I had gone as far as to be
called a revolutionist.  Had I?

	"Well I do," Byron explained, "Why you think I fell in love so quick? You
are different.  You are honest too. You hardly lie."

	"I lie," I promised him, "I only try to tell the truth when it can help
someone out.  Whether they see it that way or not is their problem."

	"I love you for that."

	He gave me a look.  It was this look of a last reach.  He was trying to
make this last attempt to grasp through to my soul.  I looked away.  I knew
by then he must have realized that he didn't have my heart.  I was honestly
not interested in Byron.  I had not seen that connection in Byron that I saw
in Sampson or that I saw in T-Boy.  I cared for Byron, but in the way I
would care for a lost and confused child.

	"Love can't be declared when you don't know what it is," I said, "I made
that mistake once and got my heart broken for it."

	I was thinking about T-Boy.  It was funny how things were working out.
T-Boy had acted shitty and when I forgave him, it seemed like we had gotten
closer then ever.  I kept thinking about what would happen if I dropped the
"L" bomb on T-Boy again.  It scared me to think I might lose him twice.

	"So there's no chance between us?"

	He was persistent.  I had to give him that.

	"No. I'm sorry."

	"Ok," he said with drying tears, "I just wish it wouldn't hurt so much. I
wish I could come to terms with all of this. You have no idea how close I
was to just ending all this hurt.  I hate what I've become..."

	"Maybe it's the career," I explained and looked at him sideways,  "I
mean...escorting..."

	"I stopped that after because of you.  I never did it for the money anyway.
  I am kind of well off enough.  I just always yearned for attention.  I
quit after I realized that I only wanted attention from you."

	My heart sunk.  It was weird to feel like I was admired.  I had never been
told so many sweet things back after back without feeling anything towards
the person.  I wondered if the reason why I wasn't attracted to Byron was
that he was so much like me.  We did dress differently, look differently and
act differently.  However, emotionally we had resemblances.  Deep inside, I
knew that if Dr. Lopez had not been there to help me. I would have been on
the same exact track that he was in.  I would have been in T-Boy's room,
threatening to cut my wrist if he said he didn't love me.

	"I have someone that you can call," I said, "She helped me.  Her name is
Dr. Lopez.  I can take you by her office tomorrow. She helped me put a lot
of things in perspective.  When I got my heart broken, she helped me through
it."

	I knew it must of felt weird for him that the person he was lusting over
was the same person that was now trying to convince him to go to a
professional so that he could move on.

	He nodded, however and then whispered,  "Thanks."

..................................................................................................................

	I didn't want to let Byron go home alone that night, so I offered to let
him sleep over.  I gave him my bed and U slept on the floor beside the bed
(despite his protests).  I knew he needed as much comfort as possible after
trying to take his life. He had gone to sleep after 10 minutes of getting
comfortable in his sleeping arrangements.  When the 10 minutes had gone, I
heard him letting out soft snores that were actually kind of cute if you
listened.

I felt this yearning to be like the person that he had described. I felt
eager to be like that revolutionary person that was strong in mind.  I still
didn't know if that was me or not, but liked the sound of it.  Was the
definition of Syn one that described a person full of truth?

	I didn't know how truthful his whole thesis on me was.  Some people said I
had an attitude problem and some people called me conceited.  I just figured
that I was being forward with the emotions that came in my mind, whether
they be negative nor not.  It was good to think about all of these things
and even though it took a large portion out of my night, I knew that they
had to be thought on.

..................................................................................................................
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't want you around that psycho!" T-Boy screeched, his tone full of
concern.

	My eyes twisted in disbelief, "You don't know him."

	I had told T-Boy all about Byron the next morning.  It was Saturday.  I had
told T-Boy that I was going to try to make steps to help Byron.  T-Boy just
hated the fact.  He had been talking about it to me all morning.  The worst
part about it all was that we were in the kitchen and Byron was in the
living room, so he was hearing parts of our conversation.  I tried to lower
T-Boy's voice, but after a while he just kept getting louder.

	"Syn, this is officially the first day that we are a couple," he noted, as
though I didn't know, "I just think that the last thing we need to be doing
is giving any mind to this guy! Lets call the cops. Let them handle it. He's
crazy."

	"Yeah, well your mother let him in my room for a price."

	He got quiet.  He seemed real embarrassed at that part.  The fact that he
didn't stand up for his mother and was so quick to believe it showed that he
didn't trust her either.  Ms. Nicole would sell her soul for enough money.

	"That doesn't excuse the fact that he may be dangerous."

	"He may be just needing some attention."

	"Why do you care?"

	"Cause I used to be just like him," I explained looking at T-Boy, "I keep
thinking that he is acting the same way to me that I acted towards you."

	It still hurt.  I mean, I still didn't show it, but it still hurt that
T-Boy had been so...hateful after he left me.  I had put so much into it and
the betrayal was something that kept this wall between T-Boy and I.  Even
though we had made up, the memory of it all had kept bricks still lying
between us.

	T-Boy held my hand, "Listen, its not the same.  You don't feel anything for
him.  I feel something for you, deeply.  There is a difference.  I felt
something even then, but I was just afraid to show it because being gay was
scaring me.  I always felt something for you."

	He leaned over.  His soft breath drew close to mine and I felt so much
electricity between us that my eyelids shut closed.  I felt the shift in
wind as he drew closer.  I felt at first his short facial hairs touching me
and then I felt his soft lips pressed up against my own. I could taste the
amount of emotion that he put in his kiss. It was so real.  I was sure then
that all of his hesitations about him and I were completely gone.

	I licked my lips when he pulled back and playfully said, "So this is how
you get what you want with Sydney all the time?"

	He licked his lips too and then drew back into me.  Our arms wrapped around
us in a hug.  We squeezed tight so that our chests were pressed up against
one another.  He smelled so masculine and his powerful grasp made me feel
like I was hugging Superman.  He kissed me again with a powerful hand that
pulled me into him for an even deeper and even more emotional kiss.

	"You think I ever kissed Sydney like that?"

	I laughed.  He definitely didn't.  I could tell because I knew a slut like
Sydney didn't take that much convincing.

	"Nah, but still I want to help Byron out," I said, remembering the point of
all this, "I just want to take him to Dr. Lopez.  I think building a healthy
friendship with Byron will help him get over his infatuation."

	"Lust can be a crazy thing."

	"He said its love."

	T-Boy had that spaced out look that he got when something was uncomfortable
for him.  The word love definitely seemed to still scare him.  He was trying
to even avoid the thought of it and I guess it made me a little at ease to
know for sure that he wasn't ready for it yet.

	"Well, we both know its really lust," he said, "If you want to help him,
then we will.  I know one thing for sure is that someone lusts over you more
then he does..."

	I found his flirtations humorous, "Oh really?"

	"Yeah," he said and leaned over to kiss me again.

	With T-Boy's sudden need to kiss me and hold my hand when we were alone, I
figured it would be different when we were out.  It was different and I
realized that as we took Byron to see Dr. Lopez.  T-Boy made sure that Byron
knew we were a couple.  Byron had been obviously social with T-Boy, despite
probably being a little upset that I was taken. T-Boy seemed nice to Byron
too, despite his cautions about him. I didn't expect them to get along so
well, but the fact that Byron wasn't "down low" with Byron as he was with
everyone else made me wonder if T-Boy was ready to be in an open
relationship.  I doubted Ms. Nicole knew he was gay.  I doubted anyone but
the people he admitted it to (Sampson, Shane and I) knew that T-Boy was gay.
If he was able to admit it to us then maybe he was able to admit it to the
world. However...was I able to admit it to the world in return?

	The three of us arrived at Dr. Lopez to see that her schedule was empty for
the afternoon.  I decided that I would just surprise her.  I knew she would
be happy to see me.  I had no bitterness towards Dr. Lopez left, but I did
feel like I was a different person from when I stopped her classes.  I
wasn't sure if Dr. Lopez would believe all the changes that I had gone
through, so I figured that I just wouldn't continue.

	Dr. Lopez watched as we walked in her room with a welcoming smile,
"Syn...how are you? I've missed you.  You have company---how nice!"

	"This is T-Boy," I said, looking at T-Boy and noticing the interested look
of Dr. Lopez, "We are a couple now."

	I had added the last part just to let her know that I indeed hadn't been
lying about all the different things that were going on in my life.  It
probably came off as a conceited "I told you so", but I knew that it just
had to be done.

	"Oh...very well.  Its nice to finally meet you T-Boy."

	Her use of the word 'finally' had caused T-Boy to give me a funny
questioning stare and then say a funny 'thanks' before looking back at the
ground.  He looked completely out of place.  He probably felt weird standing
in a shrink's office.  It was always weird for people who denied that they
needed help.

	"This is Byron," I introduced him, "He is the reason I came today.  I was
hoping you could do for Byron what you did for me. I'm sure Byron would pay
you."

	"Its not a money thing..." Dr. Lopez said, probably remember what I had
accused her of last time.

	"Oh ok," I said, really not caring much any longer, "By the way, did you
ever get the money from my uncle?"

	I knew my uncle was slow but I knew that he wasn't dumb enough not to pay
the money for what I needed.  The bank had trusted him with my parents'
money, but he was supposed to use it to help 'me'.  He knew that I would sue
him for every cent he had if he didn't give me my money.  I doubted he would
do tempt me.

	"No...I still didn't."

	"God, I'll have to see him," I explained, realizing how weird that was, "I
should go now. Hmm, maybe if you have enough time, you can start with Byron
today?  T-Boy and I will just leave."

	"Wait," Dr. Lopez said, stopping me, "I'll start with Byron today, but I
really also want to see you back in here Syn. I think there's a lot of
issues that still need to be dealt with."

	She was probably right, but I was already content with my life.

	"I might not have time with school starting," I explained to her but added,
"I might come, Doc.  Who knows?"

..................................................................................................................

	I had no plans of scheduling an appointment with Dr. Lopez.  I left Byron
there though.  I figured that if anyone, Dr. Lopez would be able to help
Byron even more then she helped me.  I didn't think she failed with me, but
I just figured that she taught me all that she could teach me.  My
personality couldn't take much more of her counseling.  I think that was
what was going on...

	T-Boy asked if I wanted to go pick up Sampson with him.  Sampson had stayed
the night over at Trash's house.  I wanted to keep T-Boy's company but I
found myself just getting more and more eager to find out where all my money
was disappearing to.  I told him to drop me off at my uncle's house, so that
I could figure it out.

	Uncle Red was a round-headed man with beady eyes.  He wasn't the smartest
in the family.  Between him and my father, many people knew Uncle Red as the
idiot brother.  It was a title that came with reason.  Uncle Red had gone
all the way to the 12th grade just to drop out because he wanted to get
hitched to some chick.  He didn't have a place to live so he had gone to
live with his fiancé's brother in New Orleans. Two months later, he realizes
that his fiancé's brother wasn't really her brother at all but really her
boyfriend.  He leaves her only to become homeless.  While homeless, he finds
800 dollars.  He gives the money to the police (which I found the stupidest
thing of all his stupid things).  He went back to begging.  Uncle Red then
spent his begging money on lottery tickets rather then food.  Out of some
chance of luck he won 10,000.  He gave half of it to his ex-fiancé for god
knows what reason and used the other half for an apartment in New Orleans.
While living in his apartment, he was robbed a full 5 times because he
leaves his door open just in case his long lost ex-fiancé should ever come
back...

	He wasn't the smartest man...

	I respected him to a limit.  I respected him because although he was
gullible and slow at times, he was very spiritual.  He believed everything
had its place in the universe.  He also believed that people were naturally
good.  I felt that it was a little naïve thesis on life, but it was also a
positive one.

	"What brings you here?"

	He didn't seem particularly excited about my arrival.  He had a long face
that had this look of complete balance in it.  I was upsetting this balance.
  I walked in his soft smelling, lightly furnished apartment and noticed why
he was so comfortable.

	"Well, Uncle Red," I said, "You know I'm not the type to beat around the
bush."

	"Oh, I'm certain you aren't," he said and gave a little laugh.

	I gave a sarcastic smile as I continued to tour his little apartment.  It
was weird because he owned the house that my parents and I used to live in
until I turned 18.  It seemed like he didn't even care though.  He still
lived in his small apartment that seemed to be satisfying him in a way that
no big townhouse could do.

	"I just needed to ask about my money."

	"What money?"

	I can't believe he was asking me that.  I gave him a narrow look.  I had
never figured him as the greedy type. Was this guy really trying to rob me?
I couldn't tell immediately if his look of confusion was genuine.

	"My parents left money with clear instructions on what should happen should
either of them die," I explained, getting into it the same way it was told
to me, "I was supposed to be sent a money every week from my parent's funds
as well as have my psychological bills cleared."

	I gave him a look and he returned it.  It was clear that he definitely was
confused.  He was like my father in a way since they both wore their
emotions on their sleeves.  They weren't the lying type.  I think the family
gene that gave them honesty had been passed down to me as well.  I could see
Uncle Red stealing from someone, but I don't think he would do it to someone
he was related to or someone that would take it personally.  The way Uncle
Red's eyebrows raised so far that his forehead wrinkled like newly washed
clothing made me certain of things.

	"Syn...by god, I have sent you over a 1000 dollars since you left here.  I
sent you an extra 500 just for the shrink's fees."

..................................................................................................................


	I had left the Uncle Red as soon as it got dark outside.  I figured I would
stay there to collect my thoughts before I returned home.  I had also used
the day with Uncle Red to purge through all his thoughts about where all
that money could have gone.  1,500 dollars was a lot of money to go
completely missing.  I had gone around completely broke for the last part of
the summer and beginning of school year.  I questioned Uncle Red with all
possible predicaments. I tried to make my thoughts fair, yet everything led
to the same answer...

	Ms. Nicole had intercepted the money.  The fact that she intercepted it was
so clear from what Uncle Red explained.  Ms. Nicole had told Uncle Red to
send the money by a special P.O box so that I wouldn't even know they were
coming.  She was the reason that Dr. Lopez had not been paid.  It was all
becoming clear and all the little pieces of anger that I had buried away
were beginning to show.

	It was dinnertime when I entered the brownstone apartment.  Ms. Nicole and
T-Boy were both in the dining room and Sampson was bringing the food that
Ms. Nicole cooked from the kitchen.

	As I walked in, I noticed T-Boy not sitting across from me like had done
before, but sitting in Ms. Nicole's chair, which was right next to the one I
usually sat in.  I sat in my usual seat and watched Ms. Nicole sitting
across from me.  I knew I looked a little weird since I was being completely
quiet and I had this pissed off look on my face.  T-Boy and Sampson both
couldn't help staring at me. Their eyes were enthralled onto mine.

	"Hey, you look like somebody just robbed you," Sampson oddly stated with a
little laugh trailing it.

	I didn't look back at him.  He didn't know how right he was about that
statement.  I couldn't believe the obvious greed that Ms. Nicole had.  I
wasn't going to let her use me...not anymore.

	I ignored him and stated, "I've decided to move out."

	The room filled with "What?" and "Whys?" immediately.  I couldn't tell who
said what, but I was sure that each of them had their motives for asking me
it.  It made me worry what Ms. Nicole's motive was.  I figured that she
wanted to keep stealing from me.  It made me sweat just to see how evil
people could be just to get what they wanted.  It simply just pissed me off.

	"Syn, you can't just leave me..." T-Boy stated.

	He looked hurt.  He was looking into my eyes when he said it.  One of his
hands was reaching out to mine.  I wanted to touch his hand so bad, but I
realized that touching his hand would only make it harder for me to leave.
I withdrew myself and got up from the table to look out towards the three of
them like I was some kind of politician.

	"I'm leaving," I explained, "You don't understand."

	I started to leave the room and immediately I knew I was being followed.  I
didn't want the money back that Ms. Nicole stole from me.  Uncle Red had
agreed to pay reimburse me anyway.  Truthfully, I didn't even want Ms.
Nicole caught red handed.  I didn't want to embarrass either T-Boy or
Sampson by telling them their mother was a thieving bitch.

	I started to walk up the stairs so that I could pack my stuff when Ms.
Nicole stopped me.

	"You aren't going anywhere," she explained, grasping my arm to stop me, "I
am your guardian now.  You are underage."

	"Don't touch me!"

	I yanked back from her so hard that she fell backwards in surprise.
Sampson had immediately stepped in between us like the nice guy he was.  He
was trying to protect her.  He's the real reason I wouldn't snitch on
Nicole.

"Whoa," he interrupted, "You just can't go around snapping at people.  We
all just don't want you to leave on bad terms. Ma is just trying to help."

"Syn, you can't leave me..." T-Boy repeated almost like in a daze.

"T-Boy...I have to."

"We just started going together though," T-Boy admitted quickly before I had
the chance to stop him, "You just became my boyfriend and now you are just
going to leave?"

	Shit!  I wasn't going to be emotional, but I saw how emotional T-Boy was.
It was kind of fucked up that we just started going together a day ago and
now I was leaving.  I could tell T-Boy was emotional.  He didn't even
realize that he was outing our relationship to both his brother and his
mother (who both seemed pissed at it).

"You two are what?"  Ms. Nicole asked.

Sampson's face just grew mad as hell as he gave me this pissed off look,
"After the way he treated you!  You are going out with him! Are you stupid?"

He was pissed.  He was more pissed then I had expected.  I guess it was
because of all the little pieces of history that he had with T-Boy and I.
He was pissed because T-Boy and him were in constant competition over
everything. He was pissed because he had defended me when T-Boy was messing
with me before.

T-Boy came forward and bumped chests hard with Sampson, "Don't call him
stupid!"

"My son isn't gay!"  Ms. Nicole was screaming as though convincing herself.

Chaos was breaking out.

"He's stupid for going out with someone who abused him like you have,"
Sampson called back to T-Boy, shoving him hard against his chest, "You just
use him to be your slave like you do Sydney!"

"You're just fucking jealous that I got a real man, while you got Mercedes
who just thinks she's one."

T-Boy pushed Sampson back and Sampson fell backwards.

"No!"  Ms. Nicole said, crying emotionally, "Tommy likes girls!"

T-Boy was cursing at Sampson, but when Sampson came back it looked like he
wasn't into talking much more.  I guess his boxing career had told him to
just go for the punches.  His look turned into one full of violence and
bitterness as he approached T-Boy.  His hands were raised in the southpaw
stance and he looked like he was getting ready to seriously have it out with
T-Boy.  Ms. Nicole was saying more bullshit about how her son wasn't gay
like she hadn't noticed the time T-Boy basically felt me up underneath her
breakfast table.  She was making so much unnecessary noise.  I just couldn't
take the chaos anymore.  I didn't know all this was going to happen.  I
didn't know I was going to go through so much resistance if I just left.  I
hadn't said anything about Ms. Nicole stealing from me because I wanted to
avoid the conflict.  I didn't know T-Boy was going to get emotional. I
didn't know Sampson would be upset with T-Boy for going out with me. I did
know Ms. Nicole didn't want T-Boy to be gay though.

"SHUT UP!"

They all turned to look at me. I had shouted it so loud that you could hear
it probably down the block and around the corner.  I had this bull face
labeled across my forehead from being defensive.  Ms. Nicole was staring at
me as though I had turned her son into a homo.  Her blatant prejudice
pierced through my defenses.

"Get out of my house," Ms. Nicole said, "I won't call anyone. I don't care
where you go, just get out of my house."

"You've got a lot of nerve," I explained, "You accept me in here and pretend
to be the nicest person. I could see through you from the beginning.  You
just cared about the money."

Sampson took steps forward to me, "Don't talk to my mother like that!"

He looked like he was about to hit me and I had raised my hands to defend
myself.  I didn't know how good that was going to be though since Sampson
could beat my ass before he took boxing, but now my defeat was just certain.
  He stopped however, when he got close.  He was just trying to scare me.

T-Boy wasn't even defending me. I guess he was a little upset that I had
been so abrupt in my thinking.  As everything calmed back down, I realized
that I would have to explain myself.  Ms. Nicole was silent as though full
of guilt all of a sudden. I knew she had an idea what I was talking about.

"What did you mean, Syn?" T-Boy asked, still in a calm yet emotional manner.

"She stole from me," I explained.

Sampson had reached out now and this time it was to push me.  I felt my
chest caving in as he did so. I fell backwards onto the stairs and tried not
to look at his angry face staring down on me.

Sampson looked bitter, "You're fucking evil.  You've been spending too much
time with T-Boy.  I can't believe you let him turn you into some lying piece
of scum!"

T-Boy was going to say something to him, but I knew whatever he was going to
say would lead to another fight.  Sampson would have been right if I was
lying.  He didn't understand what was going on.  I didn't expect him to take
the side of me over a woman who had raised him for such a long time.  His
anger was justified.

I spoke before T-Boy had a chance, "Sampson, you are a good person.  You are
just innocent though.  You don't understand that everyone has a motive.  Ms.
Nicole has been stealing from me for a while now.  Look at her...she has the
guilt written all over her face."

We did look at her.  She was completely silent and in a daze almost.  How
could Sampson not see it?

T-Boy seemed to see it cause he asked, "Ma, did you steal from my
boyfriend?"

	The word seemed to bring shivers up my spine as well as Ms. Nicole's spine.
  They were opposite shivers.

"You aren't gay, Tommy."

"Answer the fucking question!" T-Boy asked, cynically and then just added,
"I can't believe you stole from Syn!"

He believed me.  It felt so good. I guess he had opened his eyes to see the
signs a lot more then Sampson had.  I couldn't be mad at Sampson though.  I
completely understood his loyalty to Ms. Nicole.  He was the good son.
T-Boy wasn't the good son.  He realized all his mother's faults while
Sampson thought Ms. Nicole was the greatest woman to ever walk the Earth.

"Don't scream at her!" Sampson said pushing him, "She didn't steal
anything."

"Ask her, she can't even answer!"

"I don't care.  She doesn't need to. Ma isn't a thief."

	T-Boy gave Sampson a dirty look.  I knew why he was upset too.  He was more
embarrassed then upset.  Ms. Nicole was staring at the ground, completely
zooming out of the entire conversation.  She had been caught red-handed.
She knew that if she had given any argument about the fact, I would just
call my uncle and expose her.  I could have exposed her since Sampson was
giving argument, but I figured it wasn't worth it.

"Syn, we are leaving," T-Boy suddenly said and grabbed me by the hand.

"No!" Ms. Nicole said, "Tommy, don't leave me! You can't. I'll call
someone."

"I'm 18 now, Ma.  I can do what I want."

She looked broken.

"Let them go, ma," Sampson said, offering her a comforting arm on the
shoulder, he was still a little bitter about the whole entire thing.

T-Boy firmly said, "Syn, let's go."

I gave one last look to Sampson before T-Boy pulled me upstairs to pack our
things.  Sampson looked a little hurt, but I knew he was proud for standing
up for what he believed in.  That was what hurt so much.  Sampson was still
acting honorable but he was protecting the devil.  I couldn't believe she
just didn't tell him the truth.  I wanted to call the cops or something, so
that they can investigate and prove me right, just so Sampson wouldn't be so
mad at me.  I figured though, that he had to come to a conclusion about his
mother on his own.  I didn't want to break his heart anymore then I already
did by disrespecting his mother with accusations (even though they were
true).  Still...I didn't want Sampson to be mad at me.

He was really brave.  I couldn't believe he was coming with me.  It was
weird.  I had plans about what I was going to do, but I knew for sure that
he wasn't aware of them.  He marched me upstairs and we began to pack our
stuff. He was just packing his stuff roughly into a suitcase.  It made me
wonder if he was really wanting to leave with me or if he was just pissed
off with his family for a temporary time.

"T-Boy, you really want to leave?" I asked him in the privacy of his room
after I was done packing all my things.

	"I can't stay here!" T-Boy shouted as though he wanted Sampson and Ms.
Nicole to hear,  "She steals and then he defends her.  Is he blind? Doesn't
he see that she is lying?"

"Don't be mad at him," I explained, knowing it was impossible, "He is in
denial. He's standing up for what he believes in. You got to respect him.
Besides...he hasn't really realized his mother's greedy."

"Its avarice, that's what it is," T-Boy explained and then kissed me on the
cheek.

"What was that?"

"It was an apology. I'm so sorry about all this."

I wanted to tell him that it wasn't his fault but I knew it made him feel a
little good to just apologize.  I should have figured it all out a lot
earlier.  T-Boy was definitely putting a lot himself into being my
boyfriend.  I guess I hadn't realized how serious he was about it until
today.  The thought of it all was getting to me.

As we walked down the stairs with our bags, I realized that Ms. Nicole had
left to go crying in her room while Sampson was still at the bottom of the
stairs.  He had a serious look on his face and his hands were crossed.  He
was standing there as though standing guard.

T-Boy went out before me, avoiding eye contact with his brother. Sampson and
I however completely shared contact. I wasn't sure how to read his eye
contact though.  If there was any word that I could use to describe the way
he stared, it would be hurt.

I made sure T-Boy had went out to get some of the bags into the Acura when I
stood at the door.  Sampson had followed me ready to close the door.

"Sampson, I'm sorry our friendship didn't work out," I said at the door and
added, "I really care about you.  You are one of the best friends I ever
had.  It hurts to lose a friend."

He let out a sigh.  His eyes were traveling now in a weird way.

"I-I..."

"Syn! C'mon," T-Boy called from the Acura.

	I wanted to know what Sampson was going to say.  I had hoped it was
something to let me know that we could still be friends.  I would never find
out though because Sampson's cold stare returned from simply hearing T-Boy's
voice.

	"Your 'boyfriend' is calling you," Sampson muttered, "Better go."

	"Bye..."

	"Yeah," he said slamming the door, but the suddenly it peaked back open,
"Oh, Syn, I will miss you...a lot more then you can understand."

	I went to the car wondering about his comment.  It sounded like there was
bitterness to it, but the fact that he found it necessary to say it made me
confident that he was emotional about my leaving.  Even if the emotion may
have been bitterness, it felt a little good to know that he just 'didn't
care' like he had been trying to display in the house.

	T-Boy and I drove off into the Acura.  My life was going to change.  I had
a little plan, but not a lot.  I had allowed Ms. Nicole's great avarice to
get the best of my relationship with Sampson.  I knew I would have to try to
get Sampson's friendship back, but I also knew that I couldn't force him to
understand that his mother was a bad person.  I looked at T-Boy.  He held
my hand into his like he always wanted to do when we drove.