Date: Thu, 19 Mar 2009 10:18:55 -0400
From: spiderwick1 secret <spiderwick1@hotmail.com>
Subject: Long Distant Let Down

This story contains no sexual contact between teenage boys. This
story may not be legal where you live , or it may be offensive to
you, if so please leave now. This story is true and I have changed
the names of parties involved and cut out parts that were either
personal for him or me. This story is not meant to turn anyone on
or off it is just the author venting.


Long Distant Let Down


I am a gay male that has had his share of fun, fantasy and finality. I have
had the privilege of having good friend, lover and all around nice guy, in
reality I have had several of them. For some reason It seems that my
relationships seem to { pardon the pun } peter off after sometime.  I can
only think of two reasons. First it might by that I am a very loving, kind
outspoken and very protective person, this could all add up to possibly
overbearing, not really sure. The other reason is that maybe I just don't
have what it takes to keep someone that means a lot to me happy and they
start looking around until they find someone else, That could be and most
likely is, the story of my life. Any way let my stop all the self pity and
get on with the story. I am a single gay male living in Texas. The
important part I have always considered myself as an average person, sort
of a blend in disappear into the crowd type person.  The descriptions of
both parties are unimportant and would only set the stage for possibly find
out about him. It is something that I would never be able to forgive myself
for if that happened.

I have loved some very outstanding boys and young man in my life and it
was wonderful. Lately I have not had the chance, but not giving up just
quite yet. I still have a lot of love to give and some knowledge to pass
on. I recently had contact with a young man that seemed to be a great
guy, met through one of my nifty listed stories { That's a plug } anyway
things seemed to be going rather well. we spent a lot of time on the
computer IM'ing each other and really getting to know each other better.

I could mention names but for the sake of that person, and the fondness
that I still have for him, I will call him Karl.  Karl emailed me telling
me what a great story I had And how it really hit home with him. His
email struck a chord with me and I was really taken by his kindness and
his honesty.

I emailed him back and told him that I was very moved by his email and
that I would do what I could to help him even if it meant just being a
sounding board. I was surprised to get a response back rather quickly.

He told me that it was kind of me and that he really was gratefully for
my kind offer.  He was going through a lot and it was starting to pile up
on him and that it would be nice to have someone to talk to.

Well to say the least I made myself available to him.

He would IM and let me know how things were going. He told me of some of
his plans for the future and basically became my friend.

We IM'ed each other sometimes till late at night and at other times
either he or I had things to do and would let each other know that we
would be unavailable for a while.

Being his friend meant that I would be there for him when he needed me,
no strings attached.

So I would make myself busy doing things like adding to my stories or
watching movies. I would check once in a while to see if he had returned
and if not would just keep myself busy

We would talk about every thing from the size of our penis' to our
favorite color and everything in between.

 I told him about my place and he was telling my about the place the he
was hoping to get soon. I was thrilled that he was getting  his
own place and after several days I even offered to come up and visit.

We each talked about how cool that would be and I even invited him to my
place anytime he wanted to come. Mentioned I would take him to Six Flags,
Sea World and visit the Alamo as well. even knowing that at Six Flags I
would not be able to ride any of the rides, that's a different story all
together.  We had opened our selves up to each other.  We poured out all
the happiness and Fear that we wanted. I was thrilled to be able to say
that I had found someone that I was becoming close to once again.

I was again beginning to get that feeling of being a kid again, as
love can sometimes do. I am sure you know what I mean or at least I hope
you do. I was invigorated. I felt some much more alive and was willing to
do anything to keep that feeling going.

I am not in any way trying to make anyone feel bad because I would be a
fool if I was to expect someone to just drop their lives and just take
me and for want anything more.

He was seemingly satisfied at the time.

He would go and do his thing as I would and then when we were through we
would get together, it seem that things were moving along.

I had mentioned several times about not wanting to push things to fast
and he agreed that they were fine.

Things seemed to be rolling right along for both of us. Things were said
to each other and we were each happy with the way things were going.
When you are having a long distant relationship with some one and you
start to feel that that person is becoming special to you Your eyes may
not be as open or your sight as clear as you would like it to be. That
was what was happening to me. I was beginning to be more trusting and
not really seeing things they way they were but seeing things the way I
wanted . Let me say know that I have no hard feelings towards Karl.
I am now still thinking that he had to do what was right for him. You
can't hold that against anyone.

One early evening he said that he need to do something and he would get
back to me later.

I replied no problem I will be here waiting.

The night went on and the time passed and I of course telling myself that
he just was late of he forgot or he just got tired and went to bed.
The next morning I IM ed him again about 10:30,  It said he was available
but I realized that he could easily be away from the computer and
really just did not give it a thought.

Finally later that evening he got on and we talked for a little while and
then he had to go do something.

That was when I was starting to think that something was rotten in
Denmark. The rest of the night I checked and he was still available but he
was just not responding. Finally I asked him to email me and let me know
what was going on. I turned off the computer and went to bed.  I woke up
the next morning and turned on the computer and then went into the bathroom
to answer Mother Nature. When I got back I logged in to my email and
noticed an email from Karl. I opened it and looked at the time and it was
written about midnight. Well I said to myself this is not good and read
on. My hunch was right.

He stated that he was not ready for a relationship at this time and that
he was not ready to get involved in one.

I emailed him back and told him that I understood completely and that I
was still willing to be friends and that we could stay in touch and that
I would only email him when I received one from him. Since that email I
have not heard from him and at this point I most likely will never hear
from him again.

I wish him all the best and hope that everything works out for him. I
hope he finds that special person.

I have finally realized that after going through this that a relationship
like this is nothing more than a LONG DISTANT LET DOWN