Date: Wed, 12 Apr 2000 09:00:49 -0400
From: "Saxena, Anil" <asaxena@nava.com>
Subject: Two of a Kind

TWO OF A KIND

Scene is at the Church of Long Island and the year is 2025.  There is
Andrew lying in a casket.  He is in his seventies, very pale looking and is
dress in a blue polyester suit.  He is wearying a hairpiece.  His hair is
dyed black and has a mustache.  The place is packed with mourners.  His
spouse of forty-five years and his two children and their families are
sitting in the corner.  The place is very quiet and only sound coming is
from a speaker playing some religious song.  All of a sudden the door of
the church opens up and all eyes turns toward a very dashing looking tall
person who is very blond.  There is hardly any gray hair.  He is very
muscular. He could have been a movie star.  Everybody starts wondering
whether he is a star.  If his family was not around, he could have passed
as being in his thirties.  He along with his family enters the church and
takes a seat in the front row, which was reserved.  Upon seeing him, his
wife, Alisha, gets up and walks toward this person and greets him and
starts speaking "Hello Samuel, I am glad you could make it to this.  Your
friend, Andy, gave this letter to me.  He has asked me to give it to you
and wait for your instructions about the funeral.  Also I will appreciate
if you could say few words about your friend."  She then goes back to her
seat and waits for Samuel's instructions.

Sam's hands start shaking and he open's Andy Letter and start reading it.
"Dear Sam: I know that when you get this letter, I will be dead and I would
like to thank you for giving me the best moments of my life by sharing your
life and the family.  You were the best friend a person could have asked
for.  I still remember the first time I saw you.  That day seems like
yesterday.  It was July 4th, 1998.  It was a very hot and humid day, and my
family had gone to Canada for a vacation and I was feeling very lonely.  I
had decided to take a trip to New York City, which was about 30 miles from
my house, and watch the fire works.  As I was walking in the city, I
decided to enter a bar on 42nd street., and sat down at a table, and
ordered a beer.  I noticed that at the bar a male dancer was performing his
act.  After he left, the next dancer was introduced as "Sam."  I noticed
that this dancer was magnificent and as if God spared no expenses in
creating this handsome guy himself.  He was perfect.  He was at least 6
feet tall, blond, blue eyed, and very muscular.  As soon as he enters in
the stage, all the people in the bar stopped in their tasks, and started
admiring at the magnificent beauty that was on the stage.  One could see
that all of them were drooling.  Even if I had a dictionary and used all
the adjectives in it, I bet I would have run out of them in describing the
radiant personality that was on the stage.  He starts dancing. It seems
that my eyes were transfixed on this god's creation.  I did not move while
he was dancing.  After the dance, the young star approached me and said
"hello."  I could not say a word because I was in a state of shock.  I was
trembling because I could not believe than a handsome guy will talk to a
very ordinary looking guy like me (what is the name of that popular star in
90's, at my age some times it is hard to remember names.  Now I remember,
to me you looked just like Brad Pitts, while I looked more like Danny
Devito.  Remember Brad was in the film Meet Joe Young, and Danny was the
short brother in the Twins.  Why I am telling you this.  Your memory is
worse than mine is).  We started talking.  Then you asking me if I could
join you for a lunch at the restaurant since you were going there.  We
talked and talked.  I was very impressed with you.  You talked about your
family and your life.  I told you all about my life and even some things
that I never told anybody.

After the lunch we went back to the bar, as it was time for you to perform
again.  It seems that the day went very fast and it was already midnight.
I inquired you about your next time you were schedule for the act. I could
not wait for the July 17th. because that was the date you were schedule for
the show.  Again I had a good time you.  We talked and had lunch at a
Chinese restaurant and order a 'Pu Pu' platter, which you never had before.
I spend the whole day at the bar.  Somehow I was a different person when I
was around you, as if I had a dual personality.  I saw different sides of
me that I did not realize that it existed before.  From then on I made a
point of meeting you once a week, either at the bar or had a lunch with you
at a restaurant.  Atleast I started looking for these meetings. Sometimes
used to travel over seventy miles just to have lunch with you and pretended
that I had a business in your town.  I am not sure whether you had the same
feeling or not.  We found out that, even though, our families migrated to
the States from different parts of the worlds and brought up with different
culture values and social settings, you from liberal family and me form
conservative one, but we still had lots of things in common.  We both like
same foods, same type of songs and radio stations, same hobbies, same types
of movies.  We had more things that we liked together than what we dislike.
By looking at this, it seems that we must have been bothers in our previous
life.

One time I had a meeting in Newark, NJ.  This place was very close to your
house.  I was very honored when you insisted that I stay with your family
instead at the hotel.  I felt as if I was on cloud 9 when I met your lovely
family.  Your wife, Bernice, was so nice to me that I immediately decided
to make her my sister, as I never had any sister.  Your three kids,
Gregory, Iris, and Stephen were so cute.  We went out for dinner and after
the dinner we went to the town to enjoy the night..

One of the happiest moments in my life came when you asked me to be the
godfather of your fourth child, Todd.  The other moment was when your
daughter, Iris asked me to give her away along with you at her wedding as I
always considered her my daughter since I only had two boys and also named
her first son after me. The other moment was when your son, Greg, asked me
to be his son's godfather.  I was very happy whenever you asked me to
baby-sit for your kids so that you and Bernice could go out for a dinner or
a movie. I was very lucky that I had the love of two families.

I remember that twice I was really mad with you.  First time I was mad when
as usual I had a drink waiting for you after your performance, but without
telling me, you joined another person for a drink.  I was so mad that I
left without telling you.  I could not stay mad with you when you called me
at home.  The other time I was mad when during the performance you decided
to perform differently, and told me that this is what I wanted.  I became
very upset that all this time I have been telling you that I was not
interested in knowing you from the outside but what's inside your heart,
the one that makes you Sam.  I felt that you made me a part of your show
and you treated me just like one your customer.  After your performance you
caught me in my thoughts and wanted to know about what I was thinking.  I
pretended that I was just dozing off.  Through the evening I pretended to
be laughing but I was really thinking whether you misjudge me or I gave you
wrong signals.  After I left you, I though about this, found out that there
were more positive then negative things between our relationship, and the
life is too short to worry.  I should enjoy every moment with you.

Through out my life I kept my promise.  Do you remember the year 2002 when
we decided to go to Atlanta for a vacation.  We checked into Hyatts Regency
and found out that there was only one bed in the room even though we had
asked for two beds and the hotel could not find any other room with two
beds because they were full.  I made an excuse that I had cold and could
not share bed with you since I did not want you to get sick, therefore I
slept on the sofa. Every time we took vacation together, I always made some
kind of excuse for not sleeping in the same bed.  I knew that if, I was in
the bed with you, then I may become weak and may regret my actions.

Other thing that bothered in the beginning was that you used to tell me
things in details that happened between you and your so called "customers".
You never knew that those details used to make me very envoy of those
people because they could do things that I was unable to do.  Every time a
customer came into the Bar or wherever we went, I saw people coming to you
and reacting toward you, the way I could not do. They got hug from you
whenever they came in or left.  As a human being, I would have loved to do
those things all the time, then I was afraid of losing my self-respect and
your friendship.  I knew that you felt no pressure from me.  You knew that
you were not dealing with a customer but a friend.  Over the years, I
learned to control my emotions because those things used to give you so
much pleasures.  All my life I made sure that you stayed happy and never do
or say things that would make you unhappy.  All my life, I kept hoping to
get a hug from you, and which I rarely got.  From time to time, I was very
mad for setting up my standards and rules so high, even for me they were
impossible to break.  That is why I preferred to go places where I knew
that I would not run into your so called customers and would be easy for me
to control my emotions and my urges in touching you.  Through out my life I
kept looking for the answer to this question.  Am I madly in love with you
or just crazy?  Because, every free moment I had, I thought about you.

You always a complaint that most of the time you did the talking while I
stayed very quite.  I have a confession to make.  The reason I stayed quite
was that every time I was with you, my sole purpose was to keep admiring
you and I did not want to lose any precious moments from that.  Sometime, I
admit, I had no idea what you were talking about, all I would do is nod my
head as if I was paying attention to you.  All I wanted to do was to get
lost in the aroma that was being given out by your beauty.  To me admiring
you was more important thing in my life than any thing less.  Couple of
times you caught me staring at you.  Now you know the reason.

This seems very funny, when I was about 25 year old I went to Ocean City
along with my friends.  Over there we met this palm reader.  She saw my
palm and immediately she told me that I would love two people in my life.
I asked her whether I would have two marriages, two affairs, or what.  All
she told me that I would have atleast one marriage.  As I look back now, I
realized how true those words were.  My first love and only marriage was
with my wife, Alisha, other love (you) was neither a marriage nor an affair
because it was one sided.  Every week I found time to meet you.  Twice I
was fired from job because I was taking too long for lunch breaks, but I
never told you about this.  Even when you retired from the bar and opened
your business, Designer Boutique in Jersey City, I still manage to visit
you once a week or more.  I always hoped that some day you would call me
instead my calling you all the time.  Even though my family always
surrounded me, from time to time I felt as if I was lonely because you were
not there.  If I had an urge to see you or hear your voice, then I would
drive all the way to your club or business and would park my car at
distance and would see you whenever you came to work.  As soon I saw you,
then I would leave.  >From time to time you caught me in the area and I
pretended that I was your imagination.  Sometimes I would call you at work
and as soon I heard you voice, I would hang up the phone.

You always used to make fun of my fear of height and you tried very hard so
that I could overcome that fear.  Remember, in 2006, we went to Atlantic
City and we went to this place where one could scale 40 ft. wall.  You
forced me to climb this wall.  I was half way thru when suddenly I slipped
and landed on my back.  I lost my consciousness and was in coma for three
days.  You stayed by my bed till I recovered from my ordeal.  The first
things I said after I woke up was when are we going back to this place, and
you almost killed me for saying those words.  At that point I realized how
fortunate I was, to have a friend like you.

The last three months were very hard for me because I had a tumor in my
brain.  Alisha wanted to call you, but I made her promise me, not to tell
you that I was dying.  I even made her lie to you when you called by saying
that I was out of town.  I told Alisha not to call you, because I did not
want you to get upset and see your sad face.  I wanted to remember your
smiling face before I die. Lot of times, when I was suffering with pain and
in my unconscious state I would call your name and wished that you were by
my side.  But still I told Alisha not to call you, as I could not face the
fact that I was not too strong to see your sad face.  I told Alisha that,
she always had control of my body while I was alive and my friend Sam had
control of my body when I die.  He is the one who will decide about what to
do with my body.  As I believe in life after death, I hope that in my next
life, again I get you but this time in the same family so that I can get
more time to spend with you and not find excuses to meet you.  Please, do
not shed any tears on my death but wish me good luck that my dream for next
life will come true.  I never say good bye, but told you that we will meet
again.  So long.  PS you will always be my Shining Star and please forgive
me for anything that I didn't do it right.

Your Friend.  Andy."

Sam gets up from his seat and goes to the coffin.  He kneels down and gives
a hug to Andy's body and whispers some thing in his ear "Andy, I hate you,
I really hate you.  Why all those years you never told me how you felt
about me.  You told me your every thought and ideas, but kept the most
important thing from me.  I never realized how a man could love another man
so much. You always kept me on the pedestal. Why?  For you I was always a
star.  Why you kept your feelings to yourself?  I Love You.  I should have
told you these words long time ago.  I know, you have been waiting all your
life to hear these three words from me, but I was afraid to say them,
because I was not sure whether you would like it or not and was always
afraid of giving you a hug.  Why you denied me the opportunity to see you
alive for the last time?  Why you didn't have enough faith in me?"

He walks to the podium and start speaking to the audience.  "Ladies and
Gentlemen, today we have gathered here to pay our respect to a man who was
a great husband and a friend to his wife, Alisha, and a great father and
friend to his sons, Vernon and Anthony.  Above all he was a best friend to
my family and me.  Even if I had looked all over the world, I could not
have found a better one.  I always used to joke about his status and my
status but he used to tell me that in friendship there is no place for
race, sex, or status.  Friendship is all about giving and not expecting any
thing in return.  He always gave to me.  He also told me that friendship is
not worth a price if it comes between a husband and his wife.  He also said
that whenever he finds out that he becomes a cause between Bernice and me,
than he will walk out of my life forever.  One time, joking I told Andy
that when and if Bernice me, I would go to England or Mexico.  Since then
Andy made a point to see that Bernice and I stayed together.

Andy had a heart of gold.  He went out of his ways to help other, I used to
ask him why he was doing this.  He used to tell me that he got pleasure
seeing smiles on people's faces, and but was always afraid to show his
emotions to other.  I remember the day when I had an auto accident and was
in the hospital.  Andy stayed in the lobby for seven days without eating
and drinks, but would not enter my room.  Most of the time he was crying
and praying for my recovery.  He even told Bernice not to mention to me
about his presence in the hospital.  All the time I was thinking why Andy
never came to the hospital.  Now I know why.  He was afraid of losing me.

Andy's favorite song used to be an oldie form the Movie Titanic.  I would
like to recite few lines from that song, I hope I remember the lines
correctly, as Andy would say that my memory is bad:

Every night in my dreams I see you, I feel you

That is how I love you

Far across the distance and spaces between us

But you're here in my heart

And we'll stay forever this way


At that time I did not understand why this song was so important to him.
Now I see that this song reminded him about me.  I used to wonder why Andy
thought about me 24 hours.  He knew my schedule at my work better than I
used to.  No matter where my work was, he never missed a week where he
never came to see me.  If he was out of town, he would call me long
distance..."

Sam starts cry.

After he composes himself, he starts again "To Andy and Alisha, education
was very important.  As you can see their two sons, Vernon and Tony are
successful doctors in the community.  Andy used to say that he has not only
two kids but also six kids.  He persuaded my kids to go to college.  Today
my son, Greg is a doctor, my daughter, Iris is a nurse, my son Steve is a
computer professional while my younger son, Todd is entering the graduate
school for his law degree.  I would like to thank Andy and Alisha for their
persistent persuasion.

One thing about Andy was that he never complained about any thing.  I used
to design these costumes for the celebrities and would use him as a model.
I loved to dress him up so I could see how they would look on those stars.
I would use all kinds of silly makeup, wigs on his baldhead, crazy
costumes, and jewelaries, but he would not say a single word no matter how
silly he looked.  Here I need to tell you that on occasion he would look
far better in those costumes than the celebrities would.  Other thing about
Andy was, that his voice was such that, and his habit of making comments
about people's personalities, used to get us in troubles lots of times.

My kids were so fond of Uncle Andy, that it became an annual ritual for
them to go to the Yankee game once a year with Andy and to spend one week
of summer vacation at Andy and Alisha's house.

We all know that God always take the good guys earlier and leave the bad
ones behinds.  Well Andy God can take you away from us, but he can never
take your memory form our heart.  You will always remain there forever.
I--I--I--I--I..."  He could not finish his speech. He walks toward Andy and
hugs him, and starts crying loudly. There were hardly any dry eyes in the
auditorium.  Everyone was so moved by the display of the affection.  Upon
seeing this, Alisha gets up from her seat and consoles Sam by giving him a
hug.  After he composes himself, he asks Alisha and says "Alisha, why you
didn't call me and told me that Andy was dying.  Why I could not see Andy
for the last time.  You go ahead with the cremation and make sure that you
give me Andy's ashes so that I can be buried with my friend's ashes."

1