Date: Sun, 18 Oct 2015 03:03:17 -0500
From: Keito Nakagawa <keito.nakagawa@gmail.com>
Subject: Aiden and Henry - Chapter 6

I laid with Henry until he fell asleep that night. The sound of his steady
breathing normally would have calmed me but tonight I felt as if I were
keeping a terrible secret from him. I was... I should have told him...

The night air brushed against me when I snuck out from under his arm and
the covers. It had begun to drizzle slightly outside now, the small pattern
of the falling rain created a shadow drizzle on the inside of the
house. For tonight, I felt as if I couldn't in all good honesty lay next to
Henry.

In our entire relationship, I have never had to lie to him about anything,
but then again I wouldn't have been able to. Somehow he always knew, so I
stopped trying. Usually he would be the one to comfort me whenever I have
any problems, the person who would hold me and tell me that I was strong
enough to handle it myself.  But...

Last night, when he asked me if I was okay, I lied. I lied and was
convincing... Had I become someone else entirely?

It was silent in the house now, and I didn't know where to go to escape my
thoughts. Everywhere I went were pictures of the two of us... Even in the
upstairs guest room, a picture of the two of us at our first school
play. He was a "weed" of the garden and I was one of the "veggies". Looking
back, he told me I was a cute tomato, which would make me turn into one as
my face flushed.

There was no where I could go... except out. I threw on a small white
loose-knit sweater that was draped over the end of one of the dining room
chairs. It was a little large for me after stretching in the wash, it
seemed to rest a little off to the side, but that didn't matter. Sitting
outside in the patio, I could still feel some of the raindrops splashing
against the tiles and bouncing onto the edges of my legs. The shorts that I
had worn provided almost no warmth and I curled myself up onto one of the
chairs, hoping the sweater would rest over them and bring me warmth. In
that moment I felt as if I had almost escaped the world. The sound of
nothing but rain soothed me and I closed my eyes. Almost immediately my
mind began to wander.

In my mind I could see a younger version of myself, playing with Henry, we
were doing something with a swing and running back and forth touching the
fence and something I couldn't even recognize. But then, in the background
I saw him, I saw Landon staring at us...

I jerked awake with a gasp, the memories of his eyes crying as he watched
us made my heart ache...  and that stillness of my mind that I had found
disappeared as fear took its place.

The rain was pouring now, the patio provided some cover, but the sideways
rain began to hit me nonetheless. It was so cool... so refreshing. I
stepped out into the water and felt the wet grass between my toes. The
sweater was damp now, and clung to me, my hair matted down and across my
eye. I embraced the rain and felt it pelt my body. I felt warmth under my
eyes and paused before I understood that I was crying. How sad and pitiful
had Landon been, and how sad and pitiful was I that I ran away from my
problems. How sad and pitiful was I... that I had become so weak and
afraid? I cried to myself in the pouring rain for the things that I now
knew and the things I now remembered. Landon was always standing in the
shadows... his father's company had never quite picked up during our
childhood. Just as I was held back by societal convention... so was he by
status. I pitied him... but now I was too scared of him to help
him... again... I was helpless.

I stood in the rain for a good few minutes, thinking about everything. I
wanted them to get along, but some huge immeasurable weight separated
them. Was it me?

"What are you doing?!"

I whipped around to see Henry standing under the patio, he shouted at me to
come inside before I caught a cold. I heard him, but my mind couldn't
process what he wanted me to do. After another shout, he gave up and came
out from under the coverings to collect me.

"Aiden! What are you doing!?" He shouted over the rain as he came to me. I
felt his hand clasp around my wrist and pull, but my body wouldn't move.

"Aiden?" He turned to look at me carefully now. My eyes were red and puffy,
my body trembled and I knew he could tell something was wrong. Almost as
soon as our eyes met, I looked away, down at the ground. I tried very hard
to control my breathing, to suppress the sobs that worked their way
upwards.

"Aiden..." He kept saying my name, and I couldn't open my mouth to talk to
him. He stood beside me and when I finally looked at him, the tears that
were streaming down my face meshed with the rain.

"Whats wrong?" he asked, forgetting about the torrent of water that was
coming down atop us.

Again, nothing came out.

"Let me get us an umbrella." He said, I couldn't move but I couldn't let
him go, and he turned around again. He wrapped his body against mine, and I
felt his warmth press against my cold skin. He sighed and smiled a little
as he held me. He was happy... he was so happy... and I was the reason for
it.

"How pathetically in love are we?" I managed to spit out "Well, its raining
sideways, and Im here with you standing out in the rain like an
idiot... so... pretty pathetically." He said, kissing me.

I smiled before burying myself in his chest and he rocked me back and forth
a little. After a few moments I looked up at him, and his eyes gazed back.

"You look so beautiful..." He said, brushing the wet locks out of my
eyes. The rain was calmer now, a steady fall that felt almost like a
massage.

"I love you Aiden..." he said quietly, leaning in and planting a kiss on my
lips. In that split second when our lips parted I leaned in again and
caught him. I could feel him lean in further, kissing me deeply, his arms
wrapped around me tightly and I let my own clasp him tightly.

Gently, he laid me down onto the wet grass, I could feel the soggy sweater
push the water aside as my bare body felt the small blades poke between the
loose knit holes. Deftly, his shirt came off and the rain began to bead on
his bare chest and slide down his perfectly toned body. He leaned over me
on all his hands and knees as he continued to kiss me. I could feel his
arms running up the side of my body.  He lifted the soggy sweater and the
completely soaked shirt I had underneath and began to caress my body. I
couldn't tell if I was shivering from the cool rain or from his gentle
teasings..

"A-Ahh.." I moaned, my mouth filled with rain water that I let flow out
through the side of my lips. I couldn't open my mouth in the rain or else
I'd most likely drown. Instead I kept my mouth shut and soft mewls escaped
me as I had to very consciously remind myself of the water that would come
in if I screamed or moaned.

I kept my eyes closed and felt everything leave my body. My pants had been
taken off of me somewhere in the last few seconds, my shirt had been lifted
up and I felt so exposed. My body, from the chest down could feel the
falling raindrops and I felt so vulnerable...

Henry's warm hands ran up and down me, following the small lines in my abs,
the small lines of my frame that he traced down until..

"H-Henr-!" I gasped as he grasped tightly and I felt the water collect in
my mouth again.

At the same time I felt a digit enter me.. he was slowly teasing his way
in...slowly opening me up... the way he knew to or else he would hurt me..

We made love in the rain that night... as cliché as it was... and I
couldn't remember anything beyond the feeling of his naked form pressing
against me, his warmth inside me and the feeling of his muscular body
clasped between my legs as they wrapped around him. I could barely remember
the feeling of the rain tickling me, making me squirm against the grass
that poked so gently at my sides as well.  Then... nothing... nothing
except me laying in the rain, completely drained... with the products of
our night landing on me before being washed away onto our backyard lawn. I
couldn't move... nothing worked except to feel a small sense of tingling
that rang throughout my body. Then, I felt nothing but the cold as Henry
carried me into the house, laying me in the small nest of towels he had
made on the couch. He went back out for my clothes and I shivered slightly
as he threw them into the hamper with the rest of his now very damp
pajamas.

A warm blanket came out of the dryer and found its way around my naked body
and he curled himself underneath as well. I felt his strong muscular legs
intertwine with mine and in between them... the source of my pleasure...

He didn't push me to say why I was outside, and I was grateful... Sleep
came quickly after that... and the last thing I remember was him gently
stroking my hair...

---

In the morning, I woke up to find myself naked on the couch, the blanket
had curled its way down my torso, covering only my lower half. On the
coffee table beside me was a set of clothes, a small black v- neck tee and
basketball shorts.

"Good Morning Sleepyhead..." I jumped a little to see Henry at the archway
into the living room.

Quickly, I threw the clothes on and stood up. Noting the time.

"It's already 11AM?!" I panicked.

"C-Calm down..." He looked taken aback

"I-I have to go.."

"Aiden.. you don't have work today.. remember?"

As soon as he said that I froze... he was right... my mind was still
racing.

Henry's hands grabbed mine, bringing me back to reality. He nodded a
little, gesturing to the small sandwich half he had left for me.

"Get something to eat... last night was... a bit taxing for the both of
us." He grinned

He seemed to leave me alone after that, despite his promise to stay with me
at home, he was in his study most of the day, "not working" as he said. He
was a terrible liar.

Still, the time "alone" in the house gave me time to collect my thoughts. I
should go see Landon...  explain things to him, maybe it wasn't so
late. But the vision of him still terrified me.

"I'm going to the store!" I shouted, as I threw on a pair of slim fitting
shorts and a light green t-shirt. I didn't wait for him to acknowledge
me. After just a few minutes of driving, I arrived at my destination.  A
small mansion at the edge of a vast neighborhood. The doorbell summoned a
woman who looked almost annoyed to be bothered as she held in one had a
dusting rag and a feathered duster in the other. She asked in a hurried
voice what my business was before turning to dismiss another lady who was
also dusting.

"I-I'm here to see Landon.. Um.. Could you please tell him.. Aiden is
here?" I stuttered, feeling myself wither under her gaze. Strangely, the
minute I mentioned my name, her expression changed. Almost instantly I
found myself being pulled into the house and sat on a small couch in the
corner of a small wooden study.

"Wait here." She said, almost gently now.

I looked around, the study had been with Landon since he was
little... there were children's books sitting on the far end, and more
recently autobiographies of famous and successful business executives on
the other end. One of the alcoves looked a little more untouched than the
others and I walked up to it to see it full of medical texts. Some of them
were still sealed by a clear layer of protective wrapping.

"That was supposed to be for you." I jumped again, turning to see Landon
shutting the door behind him.

"W-What?"  "That bookcase, was supposed to be for you... the day that I
heard you got into medical school, I wanted to celebrate with you... but
you were too busy to come visit me... and... I guess I forgot to mention it
to you..."

"Landon..."  "No matter, now that you're here, those books are yours to
take if you'd like." He said, walking up to me.

Before I could say anything else, he wrapped his arms around me, hugging
me.

"Why did you go far away...? But now that you're here.. everything will be
okay..." He smiled as he leaned in to kiss me and I pulled back.

"Landon... I'm not here... to be with you... I'm here to visit you... to
talk to you." I said, setting the book down and breaking out of his grip.

"Very well then... what do you want to talk about?" He asked, sitting down
at the couch and motioning for me to join him.

"You... and Henry..." I could see his face tighten at the mention "I have
nothing to say on the matter."  "Landon... please.. please... dont be like
this..."  "Be like what?"  "Please don't be so angry.. just... I want you
two to be friends again, I remember now, I remember you... I remember us
sitting together at one of the events at the children's table.. we used to
laugh remember?"  "You know whats funny about memories? They tend to change
with everyone who brings them up..."  "Lan-" "You remember laughing? I
remember sitting there, being unable to say anything, except to laugh
politely at anything that Henry had to say, because my parents were so
deathly afraid that falling into his bad favor meant the death of our
company."  "Landon.."  "You remember us sitting together, I remember me
being placed at the table, strategically. My whole life has been a chess
game, run by the king and the queen. Now though, now that I'm old enough to
escape my parents, whats wrong with finally doing what I want... getting
what I want? What's wrong with me fighting with everything that I have to
get you? Because I've always liked you... I've always loved you, I told
myself that it was okay that you were with Henry, because he had everything
to offer you... but now..." He gestured to the house.

"But now... I can offer you those things too..." He finished, grinning to
himself as he poured a drink for himself.  "Landon stop, that's not why I
came here and you know it."

He studied me carefully for a moment before setting his glass down on the
table. Without a word he walked over to me and placed his hands on my
shoulders. With a deft glace at the book in my hands his eyes met mine and
he grinned.

"Then what did you come over for my dear Aiden?" I felt extremely
uncomfortable at his nonchalant tone and stumbled over my words.  "I came
here to tell you that I would not come and..be-be with you. But that I want
you to be part of our lives.. be friends with us... " It all sounded so
juvenile when I said it

He scoffed and patted me on the head. It was then, that without warning he
leaned in and kissed me.  Before I could react he had clasped my body
against his and no amount of struggling I offered broke me free.

"LANDON!" I shouted through forcibly closed lips. His hands shifted now,
pulling parts of my shirt up with them.

I finally managed to shove him back and quickly stormed out, dropping the
book with a loud `thud' on the way.

---

When I finally got home and parked in the garage, I paused to fully realize
what had just happened.  The feelings of his hands against my bare skin
made me shiver as I felt some horrible combination of contempt for him and
shame for me. My body felt dirty and I needed to wash myself clean of it
all.

Henry came out of the house and over to my car to help with the groceries,
but frowned when there weren't any in the trunk.

"Aiden... Honey... did you forget the groceries?" He mock-teased.

"Huh? Oh.. yeah... never quite made it, the store was so packed I was going
to go back later in the day."  I lied.

He seemed to accept this excuse, though I could tell from his glare that he
sensed something was fishy.  Under pretense of having to use the bathroom I
left his gaze and quickly shut myself into our room. My clothes came off
and into the hamper, the shower came on and soon I felt the warm cascading
waters engulf me. I scrubbed so hard I felt my skin turning red. Somewhere
after my third time going over myself, I heard the door creak open.

"Aiden? Are you still in here?"

"Y-Yeah..." I called back, fortunately I had collected and calmed myself by
this time.

In moment I heard footsteps approaching on the bare tile and turned to see
Henry opening the door to the shower stall. He smiled as he climbed in. For
a moment, just a moment, I blanked out as I watched the man I fell in love
with instantly become a wet Adonis. His naked body pressed against my back
now and I closed my eyes as he gently nipped at my neck.

"We're not having shower sex." I warned

"Again... you could just enjoy it..."

"No shower sex."

"But..."

"Nope, not happening." I smiled as he sadly pouted and rested his chin on
my shoulders.

"But then can we have shower cuddling...?"He asked, brightening up.

I turned to him now, and his eyes were wide with anticipation. Very gently,
I ran my hands up his sides, feeling his firm and toned body with the very
tips of my fingers. He seemed to tremor a little and go weak at the knees,
but still he held firm as we came together again. My head rested on him now
as the warm water ran through all the small crevices between us. Slowly his
hands rubbed my back, soothing me as he hummed our favorite song and swayed
me gently as if we were dancing together. His hands fell at my hips and he
braced his forehead against mine. The water that fell over us now split and
covered us, as if a veil hid our faces and I looked into his eyes. How I
loved this silly boy in front of me. I felt his hands fall a little bit
more, caressing my bottom and then slightly up my thighs... my abs.. my
chest... and he reached my cheeks and paused as he leaned in and I felt his
lips press against mine.

My heart skipped beats as I gave in and felt myself go weak at the knees.

"I love you Aiden" He said as he held me, still rocking me back and forth.

"I love you too Henry" I whispered, and he grinned as he turned off the
water and ushered me out.

"You're going to turn into a prune if you're in here much longer..."

I got dressed now, a light cotton T-shirt, whatever pants that found their
way onto me would do. It was late in the afternoon now, then sun was making
its motions to set and I began to put aside everything that was in my head
and pick up one of my books. Infectious Diseases. Fascinating. Really.

While looking at one of the biggest pustules I've ever seen, Henry sat down
beside me. I snuggled up against him as he made fake retching sounds.

"I don't know how you look at that stuff.." he commented before pulling a
throw over us. I felt so warm and content, my boyfriend behind me, a
textbook in my hands, and the feeling that nothing would ever compare to
this moment. Every once in a while I'd turn over to look at Henry's iPad,
he was organizing his portfolios and sending emails to catch up on the
events he had missed.

"I don't know how you look at that stuff.." I echoed, and he chuckled.

Dinner time came and Henry woke me up, telling me he had ordered Chinese
for us.

"You could have woken me up.. we could have cooked something.." I mumbled,
rubbing my eyes.

"I could have... but you were just so adorable laying there
sleeping... drooling.."

"I don't drool!" I quipped.

"Sure sure." He nodded

Fortunately I had read quite a few pages that afternoon and the little nap
had no effect on my assignments. When I finished typing my third page, the
doorbell rang and dinner was served.

Fried rice, sautéed green beans and some roasted chicken later, it was
back onto the couch for the two of us.

"We're like an old married couple" Henry observed

"We basically are a married couple..." I corrected.

"Maybe soon..." He said absent mindedly, and while I pretended not to hear,
my entire body tingled at the mention, but I didn't know what else to say.

In that moment, I briefly hallucinated to myself, thinking about a life
where I was married to Henry. We would live like we are now, except
inexplicably happier. We would love like we do now, except with a depth
that was unmeasurable. Just thinking about it all made the weight on my
shoulders feel lighter, as if I could finally take a breath of relief from
everything that was going on...

I only hoped that time would come soon...

---

Author: Thank you so much for sticking with me! I love hearing from you
all and if you have any suggestions or comments, please feel free to let me
know at Keito.Nakagawa@gmail.com.

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Thanks so much to those of you who have already sent me some great
comments!