Date: Thu, 23 Dec 1999 16:28:08 PST
From: Chip Dyp <chipdyp@hotmail.com>
Subject: A Family Christmas

    The following program contains material suited for a mature audience.
If you are not over 18 you should be leaving now.  Of course I can't control
you and neither can anyone else really.  This story is entirely false except
for the true parts.  And now for our feature presentation.  Viewer
Discretion is advised...

    My web site is located at http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Atrium/2898.

A Family Christmas
by: Chip Dyp  (chipdyp@hotmail.com)

November 26, 1999

    I sat on my bed reading through the deposition that had been taken at my
office the previous morning.  The company was negligent, and what was worse,
they knew it.  I was gonna fry that balding ape on the stand, unless of
course, they wanted to settle with my clients.  I'd have to call their
counsel tomorrow and see if he wanted to avoid a very messy and costly
trial.

    "Reading something interesting?"  My husband Jamie walked into the room.

    "Just a deposition."

    "Mmmm."  Jamie removed his dress shirt.  "So how was your day?"

    "Not bad.  I didn't have to go to court today.  Just the usual office
bullshit."  I finished reading the passage I was on and marked the spot so
that I could resume reading there in the morning.  I looked up just as Jamie
undid his pants and let them fall to the floor.  "You're looking beautiful.
How was your day?"

    "Don't ask."  Jamie walked into the walk-in closet.  I got off the bed,
followed him into the dark cubbyhole and wrapped my arms around his waist.
Tenderly, I began kissing his neck.  "Mmmm, is this how you get people to
talk on the stand?"

    "No" I whispered in his ear.  "I need whips and chains and paddles for
that."

    "You're incorrigible."  Jamie giggled.  He turned around and wrapped his
arms around my waist.  "Maybe I should punish you and make you talk."

    "I think that sounds like a good idea, but you should go see Phillip
before we start anything like that."

    "Isn't he asleep yet?  It's almost ten o'clock."

    "He fell asleep about an hour ago, he wanted you to wake him up when you
got home.  He's got something to tell you."

    "And what might that be," Jamie said, reaching into my sweats.

    "Hey!  Get your hand out of there.  It's cold!  Besides he made me
promise that I wouldn't tell you."

    Jamie pulled his hand out of my sweats and grabbed his from the top of
the laundry basket.  "After I've talked with Phillip I want to spend a
little quality time with you."

    "I'm sure that can be arranged."  I kissed Jamie and pulled him close.
I felt his tongue as it swept across mine.  I slipped my hands into his thin
bikini briefs and squeezed his pert little butt.  Jamie moaned and bucked
his hips, driving his hard cock into mine.  I broke the kiss and let Jamie
go.  "Hurry back, I'll be waiting."

    "Look at what you've done!"  Jamie said loudly from the closet.  "If I
go into Phillip's room with this erection, he'll think his dad is a
pervert."

    "Well, he is."

    "What was that?"  Jamie asked as he poked his head out the door.

    "Nothing."

    "Better have been nothing, bucko."  Jamie walked out the door of the
master bedroom and walked down the hallway to our son's room.  I slowly
removed my clothes and looked at myself in the full-length mirror on the
door of the closet.  The years had been good to me.  I was 32 and I still
had the body of a 25 year old.  The muscles weren't as big and defined as
they once were, but that didn't matter anymore.  I was happy with my body,
which was more than could be said for some of my co-workers.

    Slowly, I slid my hands into my underwear and pushed them to the floor.
My erect cock snapped up, smacking my stomach and spraying fine droplets of
precum across my chest.  Jamie always did this to me.  I loved him more now
then I did when we married or when we met.

    I had just finished cleaning up for bed when Jamie joined me in the
bathroom.  "You're looking very fine today, counsel."  Jamie smacked my butt
and giggled.

    "Not as fine as you, Mr. Chang.  The bathroom is all yours."

    "Mmmm, I'll be right out.  Get the bed warm for me."

    "I will." I nibbled on Jamie's ear as he started brushing his teeth.  He
tried to ignore me, but he wasn't having much luck.  He pushed my face away.

    "Go!"

    I laughed and walked back to the bedroom.  I pulled back the heavy
comforter and the satin sheets.  They were fresh and clean, just as they
should be.  Our new housekeeper was working out.  I slid into the cool bed
and pulled the comforter back over my body and lay watching the hallway
where Jamie would appear.  When my love walked into the bedroom, the dim
light played over his caramel skin, highlighting his beauty.  The small
tufts of black hair poked out from under his arms and there was a faint
trail leading to his beautiful cock.  I lifted the comforter, allowing my
love to crawl into bed with me.

    "You're so beautiful," I said. Jamie crawled on top of me.  He lowered
himself onto my chest and kissed me on the nose.

    "Not as beautiful as you," he whispered.  Jamie began kissing my neck
and my ears, further heightening my passion.  I moaned and gently began
playing with Jamie's slick hole.

    "Mmmm, I see someone is ready," I said slipping a finger past the tight
muscles.

    "Oh, not yet, please."

    I pulled the finger out, and rolled him over.  Jamie lay there looking
up at me as I began my oral ministrations.  I wanted him thrashing and
begging before I parted his checks and made love to him.  I kneeled between
his legs and began kissing his forehead.  Slowly, I kissed my way down his
body.  I kissed his neck and began sucking on his tender flesh.  Jamie
twisted, trying to break the seal, and I obliged him.  He didn't like going
to work with hickeys.

    I suckled on his Adam's apple for but a second before moving to his
collarbone.  Jamie let out a faint moan as my tongue rasped across his right
nipple and gasped when I took the ring through his left nipple into my
mouth.  I tugged on the ring with my teeth.  Jamie loved it when I played
with his ring.  I tongued the little nubbin of flesh, soaking it in saliva
before moving lower on my husband's body.

    I rubbed my five o'clock shadow against his belly, eliciting a twitch
and a gasp.  I turned my head and watched as his foreskin pulled back a
little more on his already hard cock, and saw a drop of precum oozed out.
Growling, I began nipping at the faint trail of hair that started a few
inches above his belly button.  I soaked all the fine hairs in a thick
saliva bath, stopping as I reached his navel.

    I blew a faint breeze of air across the wet hairs and watched as my love
grasped at the sheets.  Just a little more teasing and Jamie would start
begging.  He'd been moaning for almost ten minutes now.  His navel would be
his downfall.

    I licked around his gorgeous little outie belly button and then just
flicked the tip with my tongue.  Jamie groaned and bucked his hips.  A
stream of precum flowed down the taut skin of his manhood.  There was no
looseness in the skin.  "Beg for it baby and it's yours."

    "N--noooohhh...," Jamie groaned.

    "You know you want it," I hissed.  I sucked on his belly button and
began nibbling on the sensitive flesh.

    Jamie let out quite a loud scream of ecstasy and began begging.  It was
hard to make out the words and there was quite a bit of Chinese mixed in.
"Do you want it baby?"

    Jamie nodded his head frantically and lifted his hips up.  I placed the
head of my cock against the muscle guarding his slick tunnel.  Jamie wrapped
his legs around my waist and with a push my cock slid all the way in.  After
two full thrusts, Jamie let out a long yell and started speaking rapidly in
Chinese.  I felt his hot cum as it splattered against my chest.  I let out
my own groan and pumped my load into him.

    Jamie kept bucking his hips like he always did and I obliged him by
sliding my cock in and out through his pulsating sphincter muscles.  My cock
softened a little, but it quickly regained its turgidity.  Jamie kept
groaning and twitching.  I slowed my thrusts and took my time pleasuring my
lover.  It wasn't until almost a half an hour later that I blew my second
load into Jamie.  Jamie let out a whimper and his fourth load squirted onto
his chest.

    I grabbed the towel sitting on the night table and wiped the cooling cum
off of our chests.  I pulled my softening cock out of his quivering hole and
dabbed the excess lube and cum away.  Jamie let out a sigh and untwisted his
legs.  I crawled out from between his legs and lay down beside my
sweat-covered love.

    "That was fantastic," Jamie whispered as he rolled onto his side.  He
kissed me on the cheek and then laid his head on my chest.  He threw his arm
across my torso, twirling his fingers in my thick chest hair.

    "You were fantastic, I was merely there."

    "Hardly," Jamie sighed.  "I've been leaking all day, waiting for this."

    "Mmmm, should've told me.  I could've relieved a little of that pressure
for you this morning"

    "I wanted to wait until tonight."

    "Mmmm," I pulled Jamie tight against my body and yawned.

    "So, Phillip won the bet."

    "Yeah, he did.  I'm really proud of him."

    "So am I.  So, when are we going to the water park?"

    "Next weekend, I think.  I'll be finished the big project, and it'll
give Phillip something to look forward too."

    "Sounds good.  You're supposed to call my mom about Christmas when you
get some time.  Make sure you have Phillip's and my measurements when you
call."

    "Mmmm, all right.  Let's see, that's eight and a half inches and about
two inches."

    I rolled my eyes and squeezed Jamie's shoulder.  "I don't think those
are the measurements she wants, babe."

    "I know, I know.  So what would you like for Christmas?"

    "A new laptop, but wait until January for MacWorld San Francisco."

    "All right.  What do you think Phillip wants from Santa?"

    "That's an easy one.  He wants a new bike.  A red one, with 18 gears and
fat tires."

    "Yeah, that's what he keeps telling me he wants as well.  Well, we'll
wait until he writes the letter, and then go out and buy him one."

    "All right.  That solves one problem.  We'll get him some clothes and a
few of the other things on his list.  What do you want from Santa, little
boy?"  I asked looking down at my love's mussed up hair.

    Jamie stayed quiet.  I waited a few seconds and then shook his shoulder
gently.  "Jamie?"

    "Oh, uh sorry," Jamie said quietly.  I could hear the tears in his eyes.
  I pulled him up so I could look him in the eyes.

    "What's wrong, baby?"

    "Nothing.  Nothing is wrong.  I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful
son, a fantastic job."

    "Then why are you crying?"  I asked quietly.

    "I wish my parents were here to see what I've accomplished.  What I've
done with my life."

    "Shhhh, it's all right baby, it's all right."  Jamie curled his head so
it was lying on my chest again and I held him tightly as he drifted into a
calm and quiet slumber.

December 2, 1999

    "Are grandma and grandpa here yet?"  Phillip asked as he came running
out of the family room and into the kitchen.

    "We'll tell you when they get here, Phillip.  Now scoot so daddy and I
can finish icing grandma's cake."

    "Yes, Ba-ba."  Phillip looked over to where I had left the beaters after
I had pulled them out of the mixer.  "Dad, can I lick the beaters?"

    "I don't know.  What do you think Ba-ba?"

    Jamie smiled at me, and then looked at our young son.  Phillip was
trying to look as angelic as possible.  "Only if you sit at the table and
lick them."

    "All right," Phillip exclaimed as he ran over to the beaters and picked
them up.  He held one in his right hand while he went to work licking the
one in his left.

    "At the table, Phillip," Jamie said in his disciplinarian tone. "Or
daddy and I will lick them."

    Phillip scooted through the kitchen and sat down at the table.  I
watched Phillip's little pink tongue as it wrapped itself around the metal
bars that made up the beater.  I leaned towards Jamie and whispered in his
ear, "He sure takes after his Ba Ba.  Look at him go after all the icing on
that beater.  Licking, and sucking, and..."

    Jamie giggled and slapped my ass, playfully.  "Behave, or you won't be
getting any for a while."

    "Yes dear."  I said in my best-whipped husband voice.  I began kissing
Jamie on the neck as he struggled to cover the whole cake with the lemon
icing.

    "Stop it!"  Jamie moved and tried to get away from my roving lips.
Phillip laughed really loudly, stopping Jamie and I and drawing our
attention.

    "Whatcha laughing at squirt?"  I asked.

    "Daddy shi bu shi chai fa diang, ba ba?,"  Phillip said in Chinese to
Jamie.

    "I'm being silly?"  I asked with a growl.  I ran out into the kitchen
and chased after my young son.  He screamed and ran back to where Jamie was
standing.  He tried to get away from me, but I got close enough to my young
son to grab him.  I hoisted him over my shoulder and took him into the
family room where I began tickling him ferociously.  Phillip was kicking and
screaming, trying to get away from me when I yelled, "Zerbert time."

    "Noooooo!" Phillip screamed, "Ba Ba, help me!"

    "You're the one who called daddy silly," Jamie said, staying out in the
kitchen.

    I pulled up Phillip's shirt and blew into his belly.  Phillip screamed
again as the vibrations from the air tickled him.  "Am I silly?" I asked, as
I continued tickling my son.

    "No," Phillip said breathing heavily, "Let me go!"

    "All right."

    Phillip stood up and looked right at me.  "I was lying.  You're really
silly!"  He said with a sly smile.  As I stood up, he ran out of the family
room with me in close pursuit.  Phillip blew by Jamie and ran into the
living room.  I had just entered the living room when I heard a loud crash.
Phillip had run into the living room and had lost his footing on the
hardwood floor.  He had slammed into an end table, knocking a table lamp to
the floor where it shattered.

    Phillip looked at me with fear in his eyes.  He stood up and ran up the
stairs crying before I had a chance to say anything.  Jamie appeared behind
me and asked, "What happened?"

    "Phillip slipped and fell into the end table.  Go back to the kitchen,
and finish supper.  I'll go see if he's all right."

    "Okay, you get to clean up the mess.  And no more roughhousing in the
house."

    "Yes, Ba Ba."

    I walked up the stairs and knocked on my son's closed door.  I heard him
crying behind the hollow wooden door, but he wouldn't answer.  I pushed the
door open and found Phillip crying under the blankets.

    "Hey little guy, are you all right?"

    "I didn't mean to break the lamp.  Please don't get mad."

    "Hey, it's all right," I said pulling back the covers.  "I'm not mad.  I
just want to make sure you are all right.  You sure clobbered that lamp."

    "You're not mad?"

    "No, I'm not mad.  It was an accident.  Why do you think I'd be mad?"

    Phillip just shrugged and wiped his eyes.  I gave him a kiss on the
cheek and hugged him tightly.  "Is Ba Ba mad?"  He asked cautiously.

    "Ba Ba isn't mad.  He knows it was an accident.  But let's go back
downstairs.  You and I have to clean up the mess."

    I walked down the stairs with my young son holding onto my hand tightly.
  Jamie came out of the kitchen, and smiled at us.  "Are you all right,
Phillip?"

    Phillip nodded his head and clung tightly to his hand.

    "No more horsing around you two, all right?"  Jamie said, ruffling
Phillip's hair.

    "Yes, Ba Ba."

    "C'mon sport.  Let's go clean up that lamp."

    Phillip and I had just finished cleaning up the remnants of the lamp
when the doorbell rang.  "Grandma and Grandpa!" Phillip yelled as he ran to
the door.  He flung open the door, "Grandma!  Grandpa!"

    "Hello, Phillip," My mother said as she hurried into the house and gave
him a big hug.

    Jamie walked out of the kitchen and wrapped his arm around my waist.
"Happy Birthday, Mom."

    "Hello, Jamie," My mom said as she came over and gave him a hug.

    "Hi, Dad," I said shaking my dad's hand.

    "Hello Jamie, Jeremy."  My dad said as he took off his coat.  "And how
is my favourite grandson doing?"

    "I'm good, grandpa," Phillip said, giving his grandpa a hug.

    "Why don't you go have a seat in the living room?  Would you care for a
drink?  We have some Clamato if you'd like Bloody Caesars."

    "That sounds great," My father said. He lifted his grandson up and gave
him a hug.

    "Not too much vodka in mine, Jamie.  I don't want to have problems
waking up tomorrow morning," My mom said.  She followed her husband into the
living room.

    Phillip kept his grandma and grandpa entertained before supper and when
it came time to sing happy birthday, he sang the loudest.  He was so excited
when my dad opened the present that he had picked out.  My dad of course
told the excited boy that he loved the present.  Who wouldn't love a world's
best grandpa t-shirt.  I knew that dad would wear it next summer when we
were over for a BBQ.

    My mom and dad left early that night.  They had to leave early in the
morning for Boston, where my younger brother lived.  He wasn't going to be
able to come home for Christmas so my parents were going to pay him a visit.
  I was going to miss him this Christmas, but I gave my parents the gift
that Jamie, Phillip and I had bought for him.

    Jamie and I were doing the dishes when Phillip came in from the dining
room and sat at the kitchen table.  He looked to be deep in thought.
"What's up, sport?"  Jamie asked as he lifted a pile of plates to put into
the cupboard.

    "Ba ba, how come I only have one set of grandparents?"

    The plates slipped out of Jamie's hands just as he was about to put them
on the top of the stack.  They crashed down with a loud bang.  Jamie didn't
say anything for a couple of seconds so I quickly jumped in.  "You have two
sets, Phillip.  You just haven't met your other set."

    "Why not?"

    "Because they live far, far away."

    "How far?"  Phillip asked.  He was a very curious child at times.

    "Very far."

    "Farther away than uncle Jim?"

    "Yep, farther away than uncle Jim."

    "Oh."

    "Why don't you go get ready for bed?  I want you to read me a bedtime
story."

    "Okay.  I'm gonna read you 'Love You Forever'."

    I walked over to where Jamie was standing by the cupboards and wrapped
my arms around him.  He turned and asked, "Do you think it's a good idea to
lie to him?  We are eventually going to have to tell him the truth."

    "I know, but we don't have to tell him now."  Jamie just nodded and
turned back to the sink.  "Why don't you come and listen to Phillip read?
We can do the dishes later."

    "I'll finish the dishes.  You go listen to him read."

    "Are you sure?"

    Jamie nodded and started scrubbing one of the pans.  Silently, I walked
out of the kitchen and was just about to start climbing the stairs when I
heard Jamie sob.  I paused and was going to walk back into the kitchen and
hug my hurting love, when Phillip called down from his room.  I took another
look at Jamie, and then went upstairs to listen to my young son read.

    When Phillip finished the story, I gave him a kiss on the forehead and
he gave me a kiss on the cheek.  "Daddy" he asked as I stood up to leave.
"Why is Ba Ba so sad?"

    "He's just thinking about something.  Don't worry about it.  Now, you go
to sleep."

    "Yes daddy."

    I walked out of the room and down the stairs.  Jamie had finished the
dishes and was sitting in the living room with a drink.  "How are you doing,
baby?"  I asked.  I sat down beside my husband and pulled his head to my
chest.

    "I'm fine."

    "Mmm, well, you should go give Phillip a good night kiss.  He wanted to
know why you are so sad."

    "What did you tell him?"

    "I told him that you were thinking about something.  He accepted that,
and didn't ask anymore questions."

    Jamie finished his drink quickly and walked up to Phillip's room.  I
didn't hear any noises, and when Jaime came down the stairs there was a
faint grin on his face.  "Phillip told me that he loved me," Jamie said.  He
sat down in my lap.  "He also told me that he didn't want me to be so sad."

    "What did you tell him?"

    "I told him that he made me very happy and that I loved him."

    "He's a beautiful boy," I said, caressing Jamie's cheek.

    "Yeah, he is.  He's a very special child.  I can't imagine life without
him."   Jamie nuzzled his head against my chest and continued.  "You are a
very special man, too.  I know that learning a second language is tough, but
you sure have thrown yourself into it.  Your Chinese has improved a lot."

    "I have a good teacher, and two guys at home that are eager to help me."

    "Not to mention all those Hong Kong action films we've been watching."

    I smiled and gently stroked Jamie's thigh.  "They've helped to."

    "I think that we should go upstairs and watch one of those special
Chinese tapes that I picked up."

    "Mmmmm.....Woe bu shiu yao na shie chung wen lu yieng dai.  Woe yo ge fe
chang teu bein how de ai zeng chang fu."

    Jamie kissed me and wiggled in my lap.  "Then why don't you take that
special Chinese husband, who is a fantastic lover upstairs because he wants
to practice some of the things he saw on that special Chinese tape."

    Jamie stood and helped me out of the chair.  I lifted him from the
ground and carried him up to our room.  I made a mental note to make some
calls when I got into the office on Monday.  I wanted Jamie to be happy.

December 14, 1999

    "Yes, I'm sure...  It would mean a lot to us if you'd come....  No, we
have a son now....  He's fluent in Chinese...I look forward to seeing
you...yes, good bye."

    I hung up the phone and looked out the window with a small smile.
Things were going to be fantastic this Christmas.  And it had only taken one
phone call.  The intercom buzzed, and my secretary told me that a client was
waiting.  I spun around so I was facing the door and told her to send him
in.

December 24, 1999

    There were times I hated being a lawyer.  I hated getting calls from
clients at home.  But when your biggest client calls about a search warrant,
you go and ease his anxiety and make sure that the law is being followed.
Damn the police and the prosecutor for executing a search warrant on
Christmas Eve.

    The paperwork had checked out and I reassured our client that the police
were doing things right.  It wasn't a major concern.  They just wanted to
make sure their rights weren't being violated.

    I got out of my car and looked at the house.  "Anytime now."  I thought
as I walked up the stairs.  "Anytime."

    The house was quiet when I walked in and put my briefcase down.  "I'm
home," I called out, removing my leather gloves.  Jamie came whipping around
the corner from the upstairs hallway and took the stairs two at a time.  He
slid to a stop in front of me and slapped me.

    "How could you, you lousy son of a bitch?"

    I rubbed my stinging cheek and stared at Jamie.  Jamie wound up to slap
me again but I caught his hand.  "What is your problem?"

    Jamie spat in my face and wrenched his hand away.  "What is my problem?
What is my problem?  I'll tell you what my problem is.  You invited my
parents to our house for Christmas, and didn't tell me."

    "It was meant to be a surprise," I said raising my voice.  "If I had
told you, it wouldn't have been a surprise."

    "Do you have no brains?  Don't you remember what happened when I told my
parents I was gay and that I was dating a white guy?  They freaked out - a
little because I was gay, but a lot because I was dating you.  They disowned
me.  Yet you feel you can invite them to our home and change them.  Guess
what?  It didn't work."

    "What happened?"  I said reaching to caress Jamie's cheek and calm him.
He pulled away and glared at me.

    "What happened was they told Phillip that he shouldn't have been born,
that his birth parents didn't love him and let us have him because he was a
half breed.  Not worthy of being their grandchild.  Not worthy of life."

    "Oh God," I whispered, "Is Phillip all right."

    "No, he's not all right.  Phillip ran up to his room crying.  I threw my
parents out and told them that if they ever hurt my son or me again, I'd
kill them.  They didn't even flinch.  They said they didn't care.  That I
wasn't their son anymore."

    "I'm sorry.  I should go talk to Phillip," I said moving to the stairs.
Jamie stopped me, and pushed me away.

    "No.  Get out."

    "He's my son, Jamie."

    "He's our son" Jamie corrected me.  "I don't want you hurting him
anymore.  Get out."

    "But--"

    "Leave," Jamie yelled.  I stopped trying to get past Jamie and grabbed
my briefcase off the ground angrily.  I pulled my gloves on, and walked out
the front door.

    I drove around for an hour, wondering how things could've have gone so
badly.  The cold winter sun dropped behind the horizon, and the streetlights
started coming on.  I turned towards a nearby hotel and pulled into the
driveway.  I checked in to a room in the hotel and walked up to my room on
the ninth floor.  I dropped my briefcase on the desk, and walked into the
bathroom.  I washed my face, hoping that it would take the redness and tears
from my face.  It took away the colour but the sorrow remained.

    I had hurt the people that meant the world to me.  They were my life, my
reason for being.  I sat down at the desk and looked at my watch.  It was
nearly suppertime but I wasn't hungry.  I took off my suit jacket and my tie
and hung them on a hanger.  I looked at the phone and decided I'd better let
the office know where I was.  The last thing I needed was the people I work
with knowing that I was having problems at home.  If they called home and
got Jamie, they'd find out in short order that he had kicked me out.

    After checking in with work, I pulled off my pants and lay down on the
bed.  I stared at the phone for an hour, trying to decide if I should call
Jamie, or if I should let him calm down.  The only other time something like
this had happened, leaving Jamie alone for a day or two helped cool things,
and it didn't take long for us to get back together.  But that had been
years ago.  Maybe I was supposed to call Jamie and beg for his forgiveness.
I had made a mistake, and I was willing to admit it.  I had just wanted to
make him happy.

    I grabbed the phone and dialled our home number.  The phone rang six
times before it was picked up.

    "Hello?"  Jamie said, cautiously.

    "Hello, Jamie it's..."  The phone clicked and there was silence.  I
didn't even get a chance to apologize to him.  I hung up the phone and
rolled onto my back.  Guess Jamie needed a little more time to forgive me.
I lay looking at the ceiling for three hours, remembering all the good times
that the three of us had together.  I could remember the first day we had
Phillip.  How tiny he was when we brought him home from the hospital.  How
he had grown slowly, but surely.  How beautiful Jamie had looked in the
family portrait we had gotten to celebrate the event.  I closed my eyes and
fell asleep dreaming of happier times.

December 25, 1999

    I was woken up by a knock on the door late Christmas morning.  Well,
late for Christmas day, anyway.  I looked out the peephole and was surprised
to see Jamie standing there.  I pulled open the door and stood there.
Neither of us said anything, we just continued looking at each other.
Jamie's eyes were red and his cheeks were red from crying.  I could tell
that he hadn't slept well the night before.  I felt guilty at being able to
sleep through the night.

    "Did you want to come in?"  I asked quietly, stepping out of the
doorway.

    Jamie walked into the room, a duffel bag over his shoulder.  He walked
into the main part of the room and looked back at me.  I shut the door and
walked back to the bed.  I didn't say anything to Jamie .  I didn't have a
clue what to say to him.  Finally my brain started functioning, and I looked
deep into Jamie 's eyes and spoke.

    "Jamie, I'm sorry that I hurt you.  And I'm sorry that I hurt Phillip.
I only wanted to make you happy.  You seemed so sad that your parents
weren't around.  But you're right.  I should've known that I couldn't change
them, even with the promise of seeing their only grandchild."

    Jamie put his finger on my lips before I could continue and wrapped his
arms around me.  He rested his head on my chest, and began speaking.  "I
know you're sorry, and I'll forgive you if you forgive me."

    "For what?  You did nothing wrong."

    "Yes, I did.  I hurt Phillip more than you did when I kicked you out.
It wasn't your fault that my parent's acted the way they did.  You thought
it would be a surprise, and would make me happy.  It would've made me so
happy if my parents had accepted you and accepted Phillip and accepted me.
They didn't though.  But that's not your fault.

    "When I kicked you out, Phillip was at the top of the stairs listening
as we argued.  When you walked out that door, he ran to the bathroom and
locked himself in.  He wouldn't talk to me, and he wouldn't come out until I
told him I'd call the Fire Department to come knock down the door.  He came
out and lay down on his bed.  He wouldn't talk to me though."

    "Is he all right?" I asked.

    Jamie sat down on the chair and started crying.  "I don't know.  He
wouldn't talk to me this morning either.  He wouldn't come out and see what
Santa had brought, and he wouldn't say 'hi' to grandma and grandpa when they
arrived."

    "So you came here so I could convince him to talk to you?  Is that the
only reason you're here?"

    "No, I'm here because I love you.  I was going to come see you this
morning regardless of what happened with Phillip.  I called your parent's
last night and asked them to come as early as they could so I could come
talk to you."

    "Why didn't you just call?"

    "Because I wanted to beg for forgiveness in person."

    "How did you know where I was staying?"  I asked as I hugged Jamie.

    "I called your secretary and asked him where you were.  He was more than
happy to tell me."  Jamie pulled away from my embrace and looked at me.  "Do
you forgive me?"

    "Of course, I love you so much."  I pulled Jamie back to me.  Jamie
cried in my arms for several minutes while I stroked his longish black hair.
  When he stopped crying, I kissed his forehead and wiped the tears away.
"Well, should we get home?"

    "You need to clean up first.  Your parents want to take a bunch of
pictures, as usual."

    "Will you come wash my back?"  I asked, rubbing Jamie's chest and gently
tweaking his nipple ring.

    "We don't have time for that," Jamie said wistfully.

    I nodded and turned around.  I quickly showered and shaved while Jamie
sat watching the television.  When I finished dressing, I walked out into
the room and gave Jamie a big kiss.  "Let's go," I said, grabbing my
briefcase.

    After a quick stop at the front desk to pay my bill, we walked out to
where my car was waiting.  Jamie hopped into the passenger seat, and smiled
when I looked at him funny.  "I took a cab."

    "Oh, okay."

    The drive home was a quick one, with the streets barren on this cold
Christmas morning.  I pulled into the driveway and parked beside my parent's
minivan.  When we walked into the house, my mom and dad walked to the door
and gave us both a hug.

    "He's still upstairs.  He hasn't talked to us yet."  My mom said,
kissing me on the cheek.

    "All right.  C'mon Jamie, we should go talk to him."

    "Are you sure that you want me to come?"

    "I'm sure.  You're his Ba Ba," I replied taking Jamie's hand.  Together
we climbed the stairs to where our son lay.  When we arrived at his door, I
was a little worried.  Phillip's bedroom door was shut which was unusual.
He rarely closed the door.

    I decided the best approach would be to knock on his door, rather than
just walking into his room.  I knocked on the door and said, "Phillip, it's
daddy and Ba Ba.  Can we come in?"

    There was no response from Phillip for several seconds and then the door
to his room opened slightly.  I pushed the door open and watched as my
pyjama clad son slowly walked back to his bed and crawled under the covers.
I walked into my son's room, and looked at some pictures he had on his
dresser.  There was a picture of the three of us taken last year when we had
built a snowman and our latest family portrait.  There was also a picture of
Jamie and I kissing under the mistletoe last Christmas.  For all the times I
had been in Phillip's room, I couldn't remember ever seeing those pictures.

    I took a few more steps and sat down on the edge of Phillip's bed.  I
gently rubbed his shoulder, and said, "Hey baby, Ba Ba and I need to talk
with you."  Phillip didn't respond.  He just stayed under the blankets
looking away from us.

    "Phillip, I want to apologize for what your grandparents said to you.
They were wrong.  You are a special boy, and Ba Ba and I love you so much.
I thought that it would be a special surprise for you and your Ba Ba, but I
was wrong.  I love you and Ba Ba so much, and I'm so sorry that they hurt
the two of you.

    Phillip rolled over and looked at us with bloodshot eyes.  He had been
crying, and crying hard from the looks of it.  "Are you and Ba Ba getting
divorced?"

    "Oh baby, no.  I love Ba Ba.  Why would you think that we are getting
divorced?"

    "Myles parents fought and his mom threw his dad out of the house.  I
don't want you guys to get a divorce."

    "Oh Phillip," Jamie said, crouching by Phillip's head.  "We won't be
getting a divorce.  I made your dad leave last night because I was mad at
him over what your grandma and grandpa said to you.  What they said was
wrong, but I shouldn't have made daddy leave."

    "Do you still love daddy?"

    "I love daddy and you a whole bunch."

    Phillip looked up at Jamie and I as we stared down on him.  "Daddy kiss
Ba Ba.

    "All right."  I kissed Jamie on the cheek and smiled at Phillip.

    "No, on the lips."

    I leaned over and placed my hand behind Jamie's head and pulled him
close.  Our lips met and we passionately kissed while our young son watched.
  When I finally broke the kiss, Jamie sighed and looked down at Phillip.
"How was that?"

    "That was great."  Phillip sat up and wrapped his arms around Jamie and
I.  He gave us both a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.  "I love you daddy.
I love you Ba Ba."

    "We love you too, Phillip," I said grabbing him and tossing him over my
shoulder.  "But you smell.  It's bath time for you."

    "Noooo!  Let me go," Phillip screamed as I carried him to the bathroom,
"Ba Ba, help me!"

    "Nope, daddy is right.  You do stink, and you need to have a bath before
we open presents."

    I carried Phillip into the bathroom and put him down on the bath mat.
As I ran the water Phillip took off his clothes and got ready for his bath.
It didn't take him long to bathe with the promise of Christmas presents.
When he finished washing, I told him to hop out of the bathtub.  I was just
about to grab a towel when he ran over and wrapped his arms around me.  "You
and Ba Ba are the greatest dads ever, daddy."

    I kissed my naked son on the nose, and wrapped a towel around him.
"You're pretty terrific yourself, kiddo," Jamie said from the doorway.  He
walked in to the bathroom and got a wet hug from Phillip.  "Well, when you
finished getting dressed, we'll open some presents, okay?"

    "All right!"

    Phillip ran back to his bedroom naked leaving Jamie and I standing
together in the bathroom.  "He's right.  You are the greatest dad ever,"
Jamie said, wrapping his arms around me.

    "Mmmm, I share the title with you, beautiful."

    "Merry Christmas, Jeremy."

    "Merry Christmas, Jamie."

    "C'mon," Phillip yelled as he tore past the bathroom door  "I want to
see what I got from Santa!!"

    I smiled, and together, Jamie and I walked out of the bathroom.  We
weren't going to let Jamie's parents or our fight ruin our Christmas
celebration.

*****

I would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a Merry Christmas.
In this season of holiday cheer, I hope that everyone has a very happy
holiday season, spent with someone they love.  Be it your family, your
children, your spouse, your lover or friends, being with someone you love
can make the holidays even brighter.

Kisses,

Chip Dyp
Christmas 1999
6918 Words