Date: Sat, 11 Aug 2001 10:38:44 -0400
From: bright lite <brightlite52@hotmail.com>
Subject: Jase 'n' Zach, Chapter 13

Copyright 2001.

a)  The following story is a work of fiction, and the rights of this series
belong to its author.

b)  If you are breaking one or more of your local laws by reading this,
don't read any further! And,

c)  Still thinking about the guys and their story, hope I didn't make anyone
wait too long.  It's a real pleasure to know that the story is appreciated,
thanks to all who have written in support.


Chapter 13.  Just Reminiscing--

	Another typical day, and I was catching up on laundry while the Jase and
Eric were off jogging after work.  The pile of clean clothes on the bed was
slowly disappearing as I folded and put them away, whistling softly to
myself.  There were good memories attached to those clothes; some of them
went back to our days in college, including the pair of boxers I now held in
my hand.  They were the first ones I ever saw Jase in, and as I sat down on
the bed and turned them over in my hands, I remembered how wonderful it was
that very first time Jase held me close.

	It was the end of summer vacation, and I was back at school, eager to start
my second year of college.  Jase and I had secured a corner room in a house
just off campus, and although there were some conditions tied to the
arrangement, the rent was well under what we had been paying as dorm rats.
The lady we sublet from was a business professor at the University, and Jase
was one of her favorite students; provided we helped her keep up the house
and yard, the room was ours.  By now, I was very attached to Jase.  We had
quickly become inseparable that first year after finding we shared the same
room, the same major, and many of the same interests.  Thinking back, I
suppose if should have been obvious how we felt for each other, but you know
how it is.  Guys don't show affection or talk about what's really on their
minds-except for rare occasions and typically after a few beers.

	In spite of nights spent talking across the narrow space separating our
beds, in spite of wresting in practically nothing and knowing-even if
unspoken-that we jerked off in the same room, we had protected our secrets.
I was totally closeted, and Jase, as I discovered later, had been just as
careful not to let his feelings show.  Although, unlike me, Jase had been
acting on his feelings; it came as a complete surprise when he was
thoughtlessly outed to me.

	On a beautiful fall evening just after the weather had turned cool, Jase
and I were celebrating the change in weather by walking to the local Chinese
restaurant for takeout.  We were on the way home with our feast and were
standing at an intersection waiting for the light to change, when a
convertible pulled up next to us.  A couple of guys were in the front, and
music was making the doors rattle.  I wasn't paying much attention to them
until suddenly the passenger of the car shouted at us and waved.

	"Hey, Jasey, who's that cutie you're with tonight?"

	Jase didn't reply, but he looked like he wished he were anyplace else.

	"What's the matter, Jase, cat got your tongue? Doubt it though, you told me
yourself your tongue's never been near a real pussy."  His buddy was
grabbing his shoulder the whole time, an angry look on his face, and telling
him to shut up.  It didn't help; the tirade continued.

		"You're a real asshole, Jase, you know?  Dumping me like that just because
I made a few mistakes."  He pointed at me.

	"And I feel sorry for you, if you guys are fucking each other."

	At that moment, the light turned, and the car took off with a squeal of
tires while I stood there in shock watching them go.  I turned to Jase.

	"Who the hell was that?!"

	Jase looked at me, then down at his feet, shaking his head slowly.  "Don't
pay any attention to Dave, he's just drunk."

	"You mean he-you mean you actually know that jerk?"

	"Zach, I. . . "  He paused, his face unreadable. "Let's just go home.
C'mon."

	The short walk home was made in silence, as was the meal we shared in our
room.  I couldn't bring myself to start a conversation or make eye contact
for uncertainty.  Was it really possible my roommate was gay?  It was a word
I could only say in my head, a way I thought I alone felt, and a subject I
had never talked about seriously with anyone.

	After eating, Jase cleaned up the pile of empty cartons and washed the two
forks that represented the bulk of our silverware collection.   I moved to
my bed and sat cross-legged, nervously picking a dead leaf or two from the
tiny palm tree that he'd given me just before leaving for the summer.  I had
carried it back and forth in the car with me from home, and was proud that,
despite my lack of a green thumb, it had survived.  A little water, some
fertilizer, a window facing the right direction; it all seemed simple now
that I'd had some practice.

	The bed creaked as Jase added his weight to mine and faced me across the
wrinkled sheets.  He smiled, watching me groom my plant, but I just waited
for him to start.  It was a sigh that came out first.

	"Zach, we've been friends for a while now, right?"

	Ohh, not good, I thought.  My anxiety level cranked itself up a couple of
notches, and my heart beat faster.

	"Look, Zach, we've told each other a lot, but. . .I guess, if you haven't
figured it out already, that guy was somebody I was dating."

	"So you're. . ."

	He hung his head, then looked up with those blue eyes shining from
underneath his bangs as he said something that changed both our lives
forever.

	"I'm an idiot, that's what I am."

	"Huh?"

	"Dave was so wrong for me, and I didn't want to admit it."

	"But-Jase, you're saying you're. . ."

	"Not like anybody else you know, that's for sure."

	I shut up, and looked away from him at my plant sitting on the windowsill.
There were so many things I wanted to say, and my own confession was
foremost.

	"Zach, are you. . ?"

	"Gay, I'm gay, too, Jase-and I was terrified you'd find out somehow.  And I
didn't. . .and I never. . .I can't believe you're. . ."

	He stared hard at me, then cleared his throat.  "I, uh. . .I was only going
to ask if you were ok with me being gay and us being roommates and
everything. . ."

	"Shit!"  I jumped off the bed, and went to the couch, burying my face in my
hands.  No going back now, no way-for better or for worse, we were both out
and would have to deal with it.  I heard the bed creak again, and then felt
Jase's hands on my arms as sat next to me and pulled me into a loose
embrace.

	"Zach, it's ok."  He rested his chin on my shoulder while I cowered behind
my hands.

	"Remember when I said I was an idiot?  I'm an idiot Zach, because I only
realized this summer that the guy I liked was you.   I missed you so much, I
could hardly wait for summer to end and for us to be together again."

	"Yeah?"  My response came out muffled since my face was still covered but
it was enough to make me drop my hands and lean into his shoulder.

	"Yeah, Zach-I really do.  I realized that I love you."  He stroked my back
with both hands.  "I just. . . didn't know how or if I could tell you. "

	It felt wonderful to be held against him, and I realized that what I wanted
more than anything in the world was actually here with me in this room with
both arms wrapped around my shoulders.  My uncertainties about being gay
could wait.  I pulled back and raised my face to his, looking into those
smiling eyes.

	"I. . . "

	The gap separating my lips from his disappeared, and I gently kissed him in
response.  Warm breath from his nose tickled my face, and the feather-soft
sensation of our lips touching was like nothing I'd ever felt.  My hands had
reached of their own accord to the small of his back, and I pulled him
closer as our breathing merged and we settled into each other's arms.  The
urge to slip my hands under his shirt and touch every last inch of his
smooth, warm body with my bare hands was overpowering.  I didn't though,
uncertain what to do, and the kiss went on.

	The couch proved to be just enough room for us to lie down together, Jase's
arms holding me tight from behind while I pressed myself tightly into the
matching shape of his body and closed my eyes.  The old, sagging sofa had
never been as comfortable to me as it was tonight, and, I hoped, it would be
for many more nights to come.

	The noise of the bedroom door opening startled me and I dropped the boxers
in surprise as Jase came into the room, pulling off his tank top and mopping
his face with it briefly before tossing it into the hamper in the closet.

	"Whatcha doin' with my shorts, Zach?"

	I picked them up and twirled them on one finger.  "Just thinking, that's
all."

	"Oh?"  He glanced down at my hand, then grinned.  "You want to order
Chinese?"

	I laughed and got up from the bed, closing the distance between us and
kissing him fiercely on the lips.  He pulled back after a moment and looked
at me with a knowing smile.

	"I should warn you, Zach, I'm not like anyone else you know. . ."

	"And that's why I love you, you big lug."  He drew me close, and I melted
once again into the embrace that  I knew so well.