Date: Sun, 7 Jul 2002 08:06:07 EDT
From: Keybedder@aol.com
Subject: The River Runs Dry (1/2)

THE RIVER RUNS DRY, PART ONE by K. Nitsua. Copyright 2002 by the author.

Synopsis: Dark days descend on Jon and Kevin's relationship. News comes
that Jon's former lover Matt is gravely ill, and the visit of another
friend, Ward, rekindles old feelings. A sequel to "Totaling the Balance"
and "Settling Accounts."

ONE: FRIDAY EVENING, END OF MARCH, TEXAS

"Jesus Christ, why does someone always show up early when you give a
party?" Kevin said. He was looking out the living room window toward the
street. Darkness was beginning to fall on a pleasant spring day in Texas.

"Who?" Jon asked, as he set out bowls of snacks. He had come back late from
his workout at the Steelman College gym and his hair was still damp from
the shower.

"Well, it's a man and a woman. Must be Mary and Elden."

"Aha, the token straight couple." Elden Lewis was a senior colleague in
Jon's department, and had received an invitation for that reason alone.

"Maybe they'll leave early too," Kevin said, rolling his eyes.

"Be nice. He did support me before the Tenure and Promotion Committee."

"So he says."

"What a cynic." At that moment the doorbell rang. "Just for that, you can
answer the door."

"Anything I can do, Jon?" a voice asked behind him.

"Uh--actually, Ward, I forgot to empty that ice bag I just bought into the
cooler. It's sitting on the kitchen floor. Would you mind?"

"Not a bit." Ward Childers strode toward the kitchen. Jon watched his
retreating form, admiring the wide shoulders, long legs, and he admitted to
himself, small, tight butt. Ward was handsomer now than when he had taught
German for one year at Steelman. Was that really ten years ago? Some people
aged well. He, on the other hand, felt gray and creaky these days. Maybe
that was how a Professor of English was supposed to feel.

"Hello, Professor Evans." A hand touched his shoulder.

Jon turned. With an effort, he assumed the role of genial host. "Elden,
Mary. Thanks so much for coming."

Elden Lewis shook his hand. "Congratulations. How does it feel to be one of
the big boys?" He was a thin man, sixtyish, with gray hair streaked with
its original blond and unstylish dark-rimmed glasses. His eyes were so
narrow that after years of knowing him Jon wasn't sure what color they
were. Mary, who sold real estate, was a largish blonde, frumpy despite her
best efforts to look professional. As always when he saw them together, Jon
felt a pang of sympathy for her.

"Feels great. And thank you again for your support."

The older man moved forward and his voice took on a confiding tone. "Jon, I
was so glad your promotion came through. I suppose it won't do any harm now
to say that some of us were, well, just a wee bit worried."

Jon raised his eyebrows. "Really."

"Your professional achievement and service to Steelman, of course, were
never in question. Nor your teaching ability. There are always those who
will insist on bringing up things that have nothing to do with anything."

"Such as?"

"Need I say it, Jon? Your--alternative lifestyle. The unusual nature of
your household, with a former Steelman student, no less."

Despite himself Jon's curiosity was aroused. "So someone on the committee
brought it up?"

Elden waved his hand in a dismissive gesture. "Not in so many words. But I
took the bull by the horns. Defended you. Told them that as far as I was
concerned, the private life of a faculty member was no concern of
mine. Especially someone with as stellar a record as yours in every other
aspect."

"Well." Jon kept his hands jammed in his pockets. At that moment the
doorbell rang again. "Excuse me. There are drinks in the kitchen. Why don't
you help yourselves."

He flung the door open with such force that the two men on the doorstep
took a step back, startled.

"I give up. Don't shoot," Philip Ramsey joked, raising his hands. He was
almost as tall as Jon, with graying hair and vivid blue eyes, dressed as
always in blue jeans and work boots. His partner Joe--Jon couldn't remember
his last name at the moment--stood silent, blinking.

He sighed. "Sorry, guys. Welcome."

"I thought being promoted was supposed to be a joyous occasion. Of course,
I wouldn't know." Phil shrugged.

"Long story. I'll tell you after a few drinks. Come on in."

"Thank God they left. Elden Lewis is such an asshole," Jon said some time
later. The party was in full swing, and to get away for a moment from the
clamor he had slipped out to stand by the pool. Ward was already there, his
long frame draped in one of the chaise longues, an empty glass on the metal
table next to him. A slight breeze stirred the tropical plants in the back
yard.

"Well," Ward said, "At least from now on you'll be able to talk to him
asshole to asshole."

Jon grinned, not offended. "I'll take that as a compliment. Considering how
often we've locked horns over the years, I'm surprised he supported me even
as much as he did."

Ward stretched and yawned. "The only thing I regretted about leaving here
was you, Jonno." Since moving to the Bay area he had made do with part-time
and visiting teaching positions, which left him ample time, apparently, to
work on his body. When Jon and Kevin had met him at the Austin airport the
previous afternoon they had been stunned by the brawny muscleman who had
come striding through the security gate, smiling with dazzling white teeth
from a model's face.

Jon smiled and squeezed Ward's knee. "It's good to have you back. How's the
language conference going?"

Ward shrugged. "It's okay so far. The bars here aren't like they are back
home, of course."

Jon laughed. "Aha, the truth comes out. Well, I'm honored that you stayed
for this dull party tonight."

"I wouldn't have missed it. All kidding aside, I'm really happy for you. A
Professor of English living openly with his same-sex partner. Who woulda
thunk it at stuffy Steelman."

Jon grinned. "Elden Lewis said more or less the same thing. I don't think
he meant it quite the same way."

"It's nice to see Kevin again too. Though I'm not sure he thinks so."

Jon frowned. "He has been kind of standoffish. Maybe it's the candidacy
exams coming up in his Psychology program. He's been obsessing about them
lately."

Ward shrugged. "You and I have a history. He's a little bit jealous,
maybe."

"He needs to stop it."

"Don't be too hard on him, Jon." Ward stood up. He smiled. "Maybe we should
get back inside before we give him ammunition."

"There you all are," Kevin said, spotting them as they re-entered the
house. "Just in time for the toast."

"Toast?"

"Phil Ramsey wants to toast you and me." Kevin put plastic cups of
champagne in their hands. He avoided looking Ward in the eye.

"Oh Christ," Jon said. "I'm really not good at this shit."

"Come on, Professor," Ward said, clapping him on the shoulder, "It's your
night. Go and greet your public. Right, Kevin?"

"Right," Kevin said. He took Jon's hand and pulled him ahead of Ward into
the living room. Most of the guests were gathered there, holding
glasses. They broke into applause. After a minute Philip held his hands up
for silence.

"Before we hear from our man of the evening, I would like to propose a
toast." He raised his glass in Jon's direction. "To our new Professor of
English, and long may he continue in his heroic, though ultimately futile,
role as Head Grade Deflator of Steelman College. To Jon!"

"To Jon!" They drank amid laughter and more applause.

Jon raised his hand. "Thanks for your kind words, Phil. They're really
generous, when you consider that Fine Arts gives an A to anyone who can
hold a paintbrush. Or these days, draw a stick figure with a mouse."

Raucous laughter erupted. Philip Ramsey grinned and shook his head,
acknowledging the hit. Jon waited until the hubbub died down, then spoke
again. "In all seriousness, everyone, I don't mind admitting that this was
a nerve-racking semester. I wasn't sure I'd be promoted. Your caring and
good wishes meant a lot. Thank you very much."

"To us," someone said.

Jon smiled and raised his glass. He draped his other arm around Kevin's
shoulder. He still felt daring when he did this in public, even though
everyone present knew their relationship. "Some people might say that Kevin
was the reason why there was a question about my promotion. They're
wrong. It's his love and support since the day we met--and for anyone who
doesn't know, it was the night after he graduated, so I did NOT seduce a
Steelman student." There was a definite edge to the laughter this
time. "It's his love and support that have kept me going, inspired me for
almost eight years now. It's his sense of critical thinking, developed at
Steelman by myself and others..." he poked Kevin playfully, "that's kept me
from making even more mistakes than I have." He faced his friends and
colleagues. "When you drink to me, you drink to Kevin Kuehlwasser."

"To Jon and Kevin," a voice said, and the toast echoed throughout the
room. "To Jon and Kevin."

Jon turned to Kevin and embraced him as applause and cheers surrounded
them. Under cover of the noise he whispered in his partner's ear, "I love
you."

Kevin said nothing. An unexpected lump rose in his throat. Jon seldom
verbalized his feelings about him, and never in public until now.

At that moment he caught Ward's eye. Their friend from California was
standing, applauding with the others. The expression on his face, though,
was not meant for Jon or anyone else except him. Kevin stiffened in Jon's
embrace. He shook his head once.

"Kevin," Ward had said the previous afternoon, grasping his arm in the
hallway a few minutes after his arrival. Jon was in the kitchen, out of
earshot. "It's damn good to see you. How are you?"

He had shaken off Ward's hand. "This is your room here. Bathroom's right
off of it."

Ward stared, then shook his head and chuckled. "Give me some credit, will
you? I wouldn't come on to you in my old friend's house. I'm not a total
sleazebag."

"He was more than just your friend. And he's my partner now."

"You never have told him about us, have you?"

Ward's bag was on the floor nearby. Kevin picked it up and opened the door
to the guest apartment. "All that's in the past. Let's leave it that way,
okay?"

The mischievous look in Ward's eyes further irritated him. "Have it your
way." Suddenly Ward's hands were on his face and his lips were on
his. Before he could struggle or protest he was released. Ward grinned.

"You deserved that. Now if you'll excuse me..." He took the bag from
Kevin's hand, brushed past him into the apartment and shut the door,
leaving him standing in the hall, mouth open.

Slowly he turned away and headed toward the kitchen. Jon was there, washing
dishes from lunch. Kevin headed for the coffee maker which held some
leftover breakfast brew. He poured himself a cup and put it in the
microwave to reheat.

"Ward settling in okay?"

"Guess so." The timer rang and he took the steaming cup out.

"You're sure you're okay with having him here."

"Jon, we've been through this already. I don't mind." He sat at the table
and took a sip. It tasted awful.

"Well, I have to admit I'm enjoying seeing him again," Jon said,
smiling. "He hasn't exactly gotten uglier."

"Nope."

Jon grasped Kevin's shoulder, "I'll always be grateful to him for bringing
us back together."

Kevin said nothing. Jon looked puzzled. "He told you to go back to Texas
when you met him in California, right?"

"It's all such a long time ago."

His partner patted him. "Anyhow, you came back. And the rest is history."

"Seems that long ago to you, huh?"

Jon clicked his tongue. "No. Cut me some slack, Kevin. What's gotten into
you?"

He sighed. "Sorry. Just antsy about the candidacy exams."

Jon laughed. "My Lord, they're months off. Take it easy. Where's that laid
back dude I invited over for dinner one fateful graduation night?"

Kevin turned away and picked up his coffee cup again. Those happy days
seemed eons ago. When had this part of him that he didn't share with Jon
grown to such a size?

He had thought his feelings for Ward were a thing of the past. Ward hadn't
been in the house five minutes before showing him otherwise.

Sitting in the kitchen with his partner next to him, Kevin had never felt
so alone.

As the laughter and clapping from the guests subsided, Jon let go of
Kevin. He was a little hurt. He knew he didn't tell Kevin often enough how
much he meant to him. Was he being a selfish jerk to want a little in
return? His partner had already turned away and started picking up empty
glasses and other litter.

The toast seemed to be a signal to many of the guests that the party was
ending. Jon was soon engrossed in saying thanks, shaking hands, accepting
and returning embraces.

"Congratulations again, Professor," Phil Ramsey said, wrapping him in a
bear hug.

"Thanks, Phil. You'll get your turn one of these days."

Philip made a dismissive noise. "Well, maybe. Say, your visitor? Ward, is
that his name? Joe and I think he's hot." He turned to his partner, who
allowed himself a small smile and nod.

"He taught here years ago. He was my boyfriend, before Kevin, actually."

"Really? I thought he and Kevin used to be an item. Don't know where I got
that idea. Well, thanks again."

Jon heard the phone ringing and said a hasty goodbye. When he got to the
kitchen the Caller ID display showed an unfamiliar number and area code.

"Dr. Evans?"

"Yes." He couldn't immediately place the voice.

"This is David. David Mulroy."

"David! How are you?" At once Jon was alert.

"Okay. Dr. Evans, I have some news about Dad."

"How is he?" Long ago, when Matthew Mulroy, married and with two young
children, lived in Austin, he had sought out Jon online. Though their
affair had been brief, they had never lost touch. When Matt's son David had
reached college age he had enrolled at Steelman, where Jon had begun
teaching. Matt's return to Austin on a visit to his son had rekindled their
friendship and passion. Even so, he had seldom seen Matt since that time
almost eight years ago. Matt had returned to Steelman only for David's
graduation, and he had met Kevin only that once.

"Well, not good." A chill crept through Jon's body. "The latest drugs
they've tried aren't working. Dr. Evans, Dad's not doing well at all."

"David, just how bad is he?"

Silence, then David said, "He's been asking about you. He wants to see you
before... before..."

"David. Are you calling from San Francisco?" Having achieved success with
his own software company, Matt had sold the business, moved to the Bay
area, and come out all the way as a gay man. This had strained relations
with what remained of his family, his children in particular. Jon knew that
Matt's daughter had cut all ties with him. David, whom Jon had taught, was
the one who had tried to keep the lines of communication open, even after
he had learned of Matt's and Jon's past relationship.

"No. I can't take off from work unless he gets really bad. He's getting
good care at home. Dr. Evans, I think you should go see him. Soon."

Jon drew a deep breath and closed his eyes. "It's good of you to call,
David. I'll go right away. Fortunately, we're on spring break."

He talked to David for a few more minutes, then said goodbye and headed
down the hallway toward the study, where Kevin found him sometime later,
hunched over his computer.

"But Jon," Kevin said when he told him the news, "Do you have to go right
now?"

"Kevin, he's dying. It may be my last chance."

"Did David really say that?"

"He didn't have to."

Kevin said nothing.

"It's settled," Jon said, his jaw tightening. "I'll be back in a week,
before the end of break."

"Where are you going?" Ward asked, poking his head in the door. "Everyone's
gone. What's up?"

"Jon's going to see his ex in San Francisco."

"There's more to it than that." Jon explained the situation to Ward.

"Sorry about your friend. So you're leaving soon?"

"Tomorrow. I'll be back the next Saturday."

"Well, that's too bad, Jon. I'm leaving that day."

"There'll be other times for us. There won't be for Matt." He looked at
them. "You and Kevin will have a chance to catch up."

Ward shrugged. "Guess we will. Though we'll probably both be pretty busy."

"We will," Kevin said. He turned and left the study. Jon turned to Ward to
apologize, but Ward was looking at the empty doorway. Later Jon would
remember the slight smile on his face.

TWO: SATURDAY EVENING, SAN FRANCISCO

Jon Evans stepped off the plane and into the crowd hurrying down the
corridors of the San Francisco International terminal, exhausted and
relieved that the journey was almost over. He had been lucky to obtain a
seat he could afford. Now all that remained was to pick up his luggage and
ride to Matt's house in the city, with his volunteer buddy from the
Project.

Matt's voice had been excited when Jon had called the night before. "Jon, I
can't believe you'd come all this way on such short notice. I'm so happy."

"I want to see you, Matt. I've been thinking about it for a while." He had
not mentioned David's phone call.

"I'll get Boyd to pick you up at the airport."

"Boyd?"

"Boyd Wilkerson. He's my buddy from the Project. He's helped me out for
almost a year now. I'm sure he'd be glad to come get you."

"Well, if it's not too much trouble." Emotion he could not quite identify
rose in Jon. Why shouldn't Matt have a support system in place? Still, the
thought of Matt depending on the charity of strangers disturbed him.

"It'll be fine. What time are you getting to the airport?"

At the baggage carrel Jon found his luggage. He turned, uncertain of what
to do next. Some distance away he saw a man leaning against a large metal
column, looking at him. He walked forward, raising his eyebrows, but the
man gave no sign of recognition or welcome, though his steady gaze did not
waver. Embarrassed, Jon almost turned away but decided at least to say
something. He took a deep breath and opened his mouth.

"Mr. Wilkerson?"

The man nodded. His smile did not extend to his brown eyes, which remained
level. His jeans set off his long legs and narrow hips. Boyd's reddish hair
was clipped very short, one ear pierced with a gold ring. His mouth was
framed by a neatly trimmed goatee. His arms were crossed in front of him,
biceps bulging from the short sleeves of his black T-shirt. Jon caught
himself wondering what Boyd's chest looked like under the tightly stretched
fabric.

"I'm Jon Evans. Thanks for coming to get me."

"No problem." Boyd took one of Jon's bags and began walking.

"How's Matt?" Jon asked, as they wandered among the rows of cars in the
parking garage toward Matt's vehicle, which Boyd had borrowed. He had
hardly said a word so far and Jon felt compelled to make conversation.

"I'm not a doctor. Maybe you'd better wait and ask him."

Jon gave up. He sensed something more behind Boyd's stiffness than the
awkwardness of new acquaintance. What had he done to offend him?

Despite his discomfort with Matt's buddy he enjoyed the ride to town. It
was years since Jon had been to the Bay area and he had forgotten the
intricacies of traveling in the city. Boyd took them up and down the steep
hillsides, past the downtown, toward Golden Gate Park. Jon smiled as he
recognized the concrete pagodas of Japantown.

The streets took on a more residential look. At last they slowed down in
front of one of a row of neat, white townhouses in the north part of the
city. "It's this one," Boyd said.

He picked up a remote control and pressed a button as he turned the car. A
door rose in front of them and they drove into a cramped carport.

"Not much space, is there?" Jon said.

"For San Francisco, this is gigantic. That's why the houses here cost a
million." Boyd killed the engine and they got out of the car. Jon opened
the rear door and retrieved his luggage. Boyd was already at the door that
led into the house, looking back as Jon struggled forward with his bags,
trying not to bump into objects hanging on the walls of the garage.

They stepped through a small kitchen. Dim light filtered through a window
above the sink, which looked out at the wall of the house next door. A
wooden table filled much of the floor space. Cookware and appliances were
arrayed on the countertop.

>From the next room a voice called, "Boyd? Jon? Is that you?"

Jon's heart gave a leap and he hurried forward, wishing Boyd would walk
faster. They entered the living room at the front of the house. A picture
window framed by curtains looked out onto the street.  The man sitting on
the couch in front of it turned toward them and smiled. "You're here."

Jon had braced himself for this moment, not knowing how he would react to
the sight of Matt. Now that he finally saw him his head felt light, and he
had to fight not to let his bags, one in each hand, drop with a thud to the
floor. His knees shook as he bent to put them down.

He was thin, so thin. The skin on his face was stretched tight across his
cheekbones, deep hollows underneath. His chin and neck were crisscrossed by
deep lines barely covered by a scraggly growth of beard. The hair on his
head was an indeterminate color, sparse and lifeless. Matthew Mulroy's
plain white shirt and gray trousers hung on his body as he rose to his feet
and extended his arms. "Jon," he said.

His eyes hadn't changed, though Matt's weight loss had caused them to sink
deep into their sockets. Nevertheless, they were the same brilliant blue
that Jon remembered. The smile was the same as well.

Jon moved forward and embraced him, not squeezing hard, fearing he might
hurt him. He was surprised at the strength of the arms that encircled his
body.

"Thank god," Matthew said. "Welcome."

Jon looked out the window, blinking back tears. "Matt."

"He's going to be in the guest room upstairs, right?" Boyd said. "Have you
taken your second dose of Crixivan today, Matt?"

Matt released Jon and wiped his eyes. "Yeah, damned if I know why." He
smiled at Jon. "Boyd's my buddy, nurse and sadistic master, all rolled into
one."

"We've met."

"I'll take his bags upstairs." Jon turned, surprised.

"Thanks a lot," he said, but Boyd had already left the room. In a moment
they heard his heavy footfalls on the steps.

"I use the chairlift," Matt said. "Those stairs are too much for me now."

Jon took his face in both his hands and looked at him, not speaking. Matt's
eyes filled again. "I've changed a lot, I know."

Jon shook his head. "You're the same old Matt to me."

Matt grasped his wrists. "Jon, if only I were. You don't know how much I
hoped you would come. I know David must have called you. There's not much
time."

Jon took him into his arms again. "I'm here now," he said, giving his voice
a firmness he did not feel inside. "And we have all the time in the world."

THREE: MONDAY NIGHT, TEXAS

It was almost midnight when Kevin returned home. He had stayed at the
University library in Austin until closing time, then continued studying at
a nearby coffeehouse, sipping a latte while he typed on his laptop. He
could have done the work at home but he was afraid Ward might be there. He
had driven Jon to the airport Saturday afternoon, a stiff and uncomfortable
ride for both of them. Afterward he had come home to find Ward sitting in
the living room, holding a can of Diet Coke.

He had spoken without ceremony. "Let's get one thing straight. Nothing's
going to be different because Jon is gone."

Ward nodded. "Understood."

He hadn't expected it to be so easy. "I'm not, you know, thinking we'll eat
together or anything. I mean, we don't even cook that often, Jon and me."

"I wasn't planning on being your kept boy, Doctor K."

Ward had got up then and left. Kevin had stood looking after him, baffled
and annoyed.

He pulled into the driveway and got out of his car. Ward's rented vehicle
and another that he didn't recognize were parked on the street nearby, but
the house was dark and silent. He unlocked the door and stepped in, calling
out, "Ward?" No answer. Maybe he had gone for a walk, which was just as
well. Kevin planned to be in bed by the time he got back.

Just then he stiffened. A sound had come from the back yard. Someone was
out there. Kevin moved toward the back of the house, turning on no lights
and being careful not to make any noise. He entered the kitchen. Through an
open window above the sink he could make out splashing sounds and low
voices. Whoever it was was out by the pool. Curious now rather than
apprehensive, he moved to the window and looked out.

The sconces on the back wall of the house were on, throwing a dim light on
the pool deck and illuminating the boards of the privacy fence that circled
the yard. Two men were in the pool, swimming and floating at a languid
pace. So Ward was here, after all, and with a visitor. Kevin watched them,
fascinated.

Both men were naked, their clothes thrown over two pool chairs. After a few
moments Ward swam to the shallow end and stood, water cascading off his
perfect, symmetrical body, his hair slicked down flat against his
head. Kevin could just make out his flaccid organ floating lazily below the
surface of the water, and drew in his breath. Ward looked in his direction
and he stepped back from the window.

"What's the matter?" his companion asked.

"Nothing, I guess," he heard Ward reply. "I thought I heard something."

"Doesn't look like anyone's here. You're sure he won't be back?"

Even at a distance Kevin caught the bite in Ward's chuckle. "He's been
doing his level best to avoid me. I think we're safe."

A soft laugh. "Good. I wouldn't want anyone interrupting us. Skinny dipping
is fun. Especially with you."

Conversation ceased. Curious, Kevin dared to look out again. Ward and his
unknown companion were now both standing in the shallow water, locked in an
embrace, kissing passionately. The other man was not as muscular as Ward
but attractive enough. In the semidarkness Kevin could not make out much
more.

The unknown man broke away, grasped the handles on the chrome ladder at the
end of the pool and began to climb out. He looked back at Ward and extended
his hand. Ward grasped it and followed him. The stranger's head caught the
light, and Kevin could see that he was older than Ward, with close-cropped
graying hair and a stocky build.

Standing on the deck, they picked up towels and began to dry each other's
bodies, kissing often. Sighs and clicking sounds of moist flesh contacting
flesh reached Kevin's ear. Both men's cocks were hard, standing stiff out
from their bodies.

After a while the towels slipped to the deck. Despite his outrage at what
Ward was doing in their house Kevin could not tear himself away, or make
any sound to stop them. His own cock pressed hard and painful against the
front of his pants.

Ward's friend reclined into one of the deck chairs and extended his arms in
invitation. Ward lay on top of him, the muscles in his back and buttocks
working in the dim light as he continued his lovemaking. He bent and took
one of the man's nipples into his mouth, provoking a loud groan. Kevin saw
Ward raise a finger to his lips in silent warning.

"Sorry," his companion whispered.

Ward slid down along the chair until he was sitting at its edge. He bent
and took the other man's stiff cock into his mouth. The man threw his head
back, his eyes closed. He spread his legs to give Ward maximum
access. Ward's head bobbed up and down as he sucked cock with abandon. He
reached up with his arms and grasped his partner's calves, raising his legs
and ass into the air. His strong hands pushed on the other man's thighs as
he descended beneath his balls, clambering off the chair and kneeling on
the hard concrete of the deck. Kevin heard the man on the bottom moan
softly as Ward ate his ass.

"Fuck me, man."

Ward rose, picked something up off a nearby table and returned to the
chair. The other man held his own legs this time as Ward knelt before
him. From his vantage point in the kitchen Kevin could see the shadow of
Ward's cock, straight and hard. Ward's hands fumbled with his partner's
body and his own before he mounted the chair again. He grasped his cock and
rose into position above the other man's recumbent form. One movement of
his hips and the other man's head fell back, his mouth opening in a gasp.

Ward began to thrust into him, his dimpled buttocks clenching and
unclenching with each motion. Kevin watched him fuck, and found himself
remembering back years, to the time he and Ward had been together. Longing
rose in him. He stopped fighting it and let desire course through his body.

He closed his eyes and listened to the sounds of sex, sighs and stifled
moans of pleasure. He opened them again to look upon the writhing,
thrusting male bodies, the one taking the other beneath with irresistible
power and command.

Soon the pace of Ward's thrusts increased. Kevin saw the hand of the man
bent double underneath him moving in rapid strokes on his stomach. He heard
a gasping "Shit, I'm going to cum!" between short cries that grew louder
despite the man's attempts to keep quiet.

"Do it man, cum for me. Yeah. Yeah," Ward hissed as he slammed his
partner's body with such force that Kevin thought the chair might
collapse. A triumphant "Fuck yeah!" followed by harsh gasps came from the
other man, and Kevin knew that his cock was spurting hot fluid between
their frantic bodies. Strangled grunts came from Ward as he reached his own
orgasm. He arched his back and raised his face in a gesture of triumph,
then slumped with his full weight onto his partner.

Kevin closed his eyes and bowed his head, wanting to cover his ears, unable
to stop listening. The gasps and moans outside slowly subsided. There was a
click as lips met in a wet kiss, then a soft laugh.

"You okay?" Ward asked.

"Christ yeah. That was fantastic." A pause, then, "Worth every penny."

"I aim to please."

"I was damn lucky to run into you online tonight. Too bad you're just
visiting."

"I'll be back, man. Or send an e-mail if you're ever going to be in the Bay
area."

"Sure will. Listen, is there somewhere I can get cleaned up?"

The two men rose and retrieved their clothing, then began to walk slowly
toward the house. Amazed at the dialogue he had just overheard, Kevin
barely moved away in time. He shut the door to his and Jon's bedroom just
as they entered the kitchen.

FOUR: TUESDAY, TEXAS

Kevin awoke the next morning with one thought in his mind. He had to
confront Ward. As soon as he dressed he headed to the front door, looking
out the window to make sure he hadn't left. Ward's car was at the curb,
though the other one was gone. Satisfied, Kevin went to the kitchen to make
coffee.

"Smells good. Can I have some?" Kevin turned to see Ward walking into the
kitchen, yawning and stretching. He was dressed in a muscle shirt and
shorts that bared most of his thighs.

"Sure." Kevin poured him a cup.

"Going to go for a run before I go down to UT." Ward took a sip of
coffee. "You must have gotten in late last night. I didn't see you."

Kevin turned toward the sink. He hated himself for being so nervous. "Not
that late. I... saw the cars."

Ward chuckled. "Well, I might as well confess, I, um, was entertaining a
guest."

"I know." Kevin took a deep breath and turned to face him. "I saw you."

Ward's cup thumped against the kitchen table. His smile stiffened. "You saw
us? What do you mean?"

"By the pool."

He was still smiling, but his eyes flashed. "You little shit. I thought I
heard someone. Enjoy the show?"

Kevin's face was burning. With an effort he replaced his embarrassment with
anger. "That guy sure did. Worth every penny, he said."

"Jesus. How long were you spying on us?"

"Long enough." He felt himself becoming aroused at the memory of the
previous night and raced on. "Long enough to figure out you're a cheap
escort."

Ward's laugh boomed. "Where do you get this Bette Davis stuff? Honey, I
ain't cheap. I'm expensive." He stood and spread his arms, holding his
hands out in an awkward gesture of apology. "I admit I never should have
brought that guy here. I'm sorry." His face darkened. "But I'm not sorry
about what I do. So you can save the self-righteous bullshit."

He walked toward Kevin, who found himself stepping back until he felt the
counter behind him block his escape. Ward stopped in front of him, his
strong, square-jawed face inches from his own.

"I ought to beat the shit out of you." His massive arms encircled Kevin's
body, squeezing the breath out of him. His mouth pressed against Kevin's,
hard and urgent. After a moment of fierce struggle Kevin let Ward's tongue
part his lips and dart inside. Suddenly he was kissing Ward back, their
mouths tangling, teeth clashing. They parted and Kevin slumped against
Ward's chest. He squeezed his eyes shut as sudden tears threatened him.

"This isn't easy for me either."

Kevin looked up. Anger and mockery were gone from Ward's face. He drew in
his breath at the tenderness that was revealed. He made a last effort. "I
love Jon."

"Me too. Only I love you more."

Kevin pressed his forehead against Ward's hard chest. He felt the heat rise
from the body next to him, smelled the clean scent of freshly washed
skin. Some small part of him watched in distant despair as his resistance
dissolved.

"I love you, Ward."

"I knew it," Ward said. "You've been such a bastard to me, but I knew it."

"Damn it. Why is it so easy to say it to you, and so hard to say it to
Jon?"

Ward's laugh was soft this time. "You're asking the wrong person."

In his state of abject surrender Kevin was ready for Ward to take his body
right then and there, completing the betrayal of his partner and their
friend. Instead, Ward's arms tightened around him again. They rocked slowly
back and forth, the light of the morning brightening around them.

FIVE: TUESDAY, SAN FRANCISCO

Jon let himself in the front door of the house with the key Matt had given
him. He felt a pang of anxiety at the thought of encountering Boyd, then
shrugged it off. Matt was glad he was here, and that was all that mattered.

There was no one downstairs. The dishwasher was running in the kitchen. He
climbed the stairs and knocked softly on Matt's door, in case he was
asleep.

"Come in," a voice called.

Jon opened the door and walked in. Matt was sitting in a chair, fully
dressed. He smiled.

"Come sit, Jon. How was your day?"

"Good," Jon replied. "Went across the bay to Berkeley, poked about a
bit. Tried to call a friend on the faculty, but couldn't get a hold of
him. Boyd's not here?"

Matt nodded. "He's meeting some friends for dinner tonight. He said he'd
stop back later in the evening, though. Called a few minutes ago to make
sure I'd taken my meds."

"He's very devoted to you, isn't he?"

Matt nodded. "I don't know what I would do without him. A nurse comes by
once in a while, but there's lot of times I need someone for little
things."

"He doesn't like me," Jon said.

Matt shifted in his chair, looking out the window. "I know he's been a bit
distant. Boyd's very protective of his clients."

"I'm just a friend, visiting. I'll be gone in a week. He doesn't need to
feel so threatened."

Matt turned and looked at him then, his eyes luminous. "You'll never be
`just a friend' to me, Jon. Boyd knows that. Give him time."

Jon sighed. "Okay. Maybe I'm jealous because you've got yourself such a
hunky boyfriend."

Matt laughed. "The three of us should do something together. Maybe go out
to dinner later this week." They fell silent again. Matt stirred and
scratched his head. "I need to take a shower."

"I'll leave you alone then," Jon said, getting up.

"Don't go."

He stopped, puzzled.

"Actually, Jon, I need help to do it. Can you--?"

Jon felt nervous. "Maybe you should wait for Boyd."

Matt shook his head. "It's nothing hard, Jon. I just need some physical
support, in case I get weak or slip." He got up from his chair and moved
toward the bathroom.

In the bathroom Jon helped Matt remove his clothes. Matt's skin was rough
and dry, every rib and vertebra standing out from his emaciated body. He
stepped into the tub, grasping the rail that had been installed on the
wall. A plastic chair was set inside. Jon grasped Matt's arm as he slowly
lowered himself onto it. He found himself wanting to look at Matt's
nakedness and tried to resist the temptation.

Jon grasped the hand shower and turned on the tap. He waited until the
water got warm, then extended it toward Matt.

"Well, I guess I can wait outside until you're done."

Matt looked up at him. "Jon?"

"What?"

"I'm feeling kind of weak tonight. Could you stay?"

"And watch you? Sure."

Matt hesitated. "Sometimes, Boyd gets in the tub and helps me wash. Could
you do that?"

Jon looked at him, startled. His heart beat faster. "Are you sure it's all
right?"

"I want you to. Please, Jon."

"Okay." Jon turned the tap off, stood and undressed, all the while aware of
Matt's unwavering gaze on him. When he was naked, he stepped into the
tub. In the confined space he could feel the heat from Matt's body, hear
his breathing. An involuntary tremor passed through him.

"You look great."

"Thanks."

He took the hand shower and turned it on again, holding the spray away from
Matt's body until he had adjusted the temperature, then gently wet his
skin. He saw a bar of soap sitting on the edge of the tub and bent toward
it. It slid out of his wet hand and under Matt's chair. Muttering a curse,
Jon bent to retrieve it.

"Take your time," Matt said.

Kneeling, Jon searched the floor of the tub, trying not to look at Matt's
crotch only a few inches away from his face. "I don't want you to get
chilled."

"It's okay, Jon. I'm fine. This is nice."

He found the bar of soap and lathered his friend's body, being careful not
to apply too much pressure. Matt sat quiet in his plastic chair. Jon
avoided his gaze, afraid of what might happen if their eyes met
again. After a few minutes he realized his breath was coming fast and
shallow. He could feel his heart thudding in his chest. Blood was rushing
to his face, his ears, and to his embarrassed excitement, his cock. There
was no way Matt didn't see his arousal. Why wasn't he saying anything?

He picked up the hand shower and turned the water on once more to rinse
Matt off, bending down toward him. Jon watched the soapy water run down his
friend's chest into his lap. Just as he realized that Matt's cock was
swollen too he felt a hand touch his cheek. Jon looked into eyes brimming
with emotion. "Matt..."

"Shh. It's okay." Matt's hand moved, caressing his face.

"Jesus, I'm sorry. You sick, and me getting a hardon."

Matt laughed, but when he spoke his voice broke. "I may be sick, Jon, but
I'm not dead. I can still turn you on. Do you know how wonderful that is?"

Jon closed his eyes as he kissed Matt's palm. He took Matt's fingers into
his mouth, one by one.

Both Matt's hands now cupped his face. He tried to stand. "Help me up,
Jon."

Jon dropped the hand shower. He bent and put his arms around Matt's
body. It was easy to lift him to his feet, but Matt was feeble and Jon had
to hold him firmly to keep him upright. They stood embracing, warm water
from the forgotten hand shower swirling at their feet. Jon kissed Matt, a
gentle touch on the lips.

Matt's body felt hot next to Jon's. "Matt, you're going to get chilled," he
said.

"Not if you keep holding me. Please hold me."

Matt's body began to move against his, his hips thrusting against Jon's
crotch. Their cocks made contact and an electric circuit was
completed. Desire surged through Jon's body and he began to thrust in turn,
rubbing his straining organ against Matt's stomach, forcing himself to go
slow so as not to hurt him.

The sound of their breathing echoed off the tiled walls of the
bathroom. Jon felt Matt's hand on his butt, a finger in the cleft between
his cheeks. It pushed into his hole. The sensation brought him to a quick
climax. He threw his head back and groaned as his cock pumped liquid fire
into the space between them and onto their heaving stomachs. The scent of
sex wafted through the steamy air.

"Yes Jon, cum for me. Sweet. So fucking sweet."

Matt withdrew his finger. Jon's head fell onto the shoulder of the man he
was holding as he began to recover. He felt lips shape a kiss on his
cheek. He grasped Matt's cock, which had softened. He stroked it, trying to
will the erection back, but after a few moments, Matt shook his head.

"It's those damn meds." He drew back and looked into Jon's eyes, a sad
smile on his face. "If I'm feeling good and have lots of time, I can get
myself off sometimes. But it's not going to happen tonight."

He patted Jon's cheek again. "Never mind. Holding you close like this,
seeing you cum is more than enough."

Jon noticed that Matt's legs were trembling. "Getting tired?"

Matt nodded. Jon slowly bent his knees and lowered him back into the
plastic chair. He picked up the hand shower and rinsed their bodies. When
he was finished, he turned the tap off and hung the nozzle on the wall
hook. As he straightened, Matt reached out a hand. Jon jumped as he grasped
his still swollen, sensitive cock. Matt shook his head.

"Damn, I wish we could do more with that."

A lump rose in Jon's throat. "So do I. Maybe soon."

Matt smiled. "Maybe."

"You want to get out now?"

Matt shook his head. "Would you mind washing my hair?"

Jon looked at the thinning wisps that remained on Matt's head. "Okay." He
picked up the shampoo bottle and squeezed a small amount into his palm, got
behind Matt and lathered his head, being careful not to let the suds drip
into his eyes. Matt leaned his head back, his eyes closed, as Jon massaged
his scalp. Faint noises of contentment rose from his throat. After Jon
rinsed him off he leaned down and embraced Matt once more, kissing him on
the cheek.

"Thanks, Jon."

At that moment they heard a door slam below them, then footsteps on the
stairs. "Oh my god, it's Boyd," Jon said. Before Matt could answer they
heard the door to the bedroom open.

"Hello? Matt?" Boyd called.

They heard Boyd cross the bedroom. The next instant they jumped as he
knocked on the closed bathroom door. Jon drew away from Matt and turned
toward the sound.

"Matt? Are you okay?"

Matt shot one look at Jon before he spoke. "Yes, Boyd, I'm fine. Just
getting cleaned up here."

Boyd opened the door. His voice boomed off the tiled walls. "Jesus, man,
you can't do that by yourself. Let me--"

He stopped short as he saw Jon and Matt together in the tub. Jon drew in
his breath at Boyd's icy stare.

The other man spoke, his voice tight and controlled. "I see you don't need
me."

The door slammed and they heard footsteps again, this time rapidly
receding.

"Oh Christ," Matt said.

Jon was shaking, his heart pounding. He was not only dismayed but
mystified. Boyd had caught them in a pretty obvious situation. Why had he
reacted with such anger?

At that moment he realized that Matt was still sitting in the tub, naked
and probably freezing. He stepped out of the tub and got a towel. He dried
himself off quickly and put on his underwear, then turned to help his
friend. He put all thoughts of Boyd from his mind as he helped Matt dry off
and get dressed.

When Matt was in his pajamas and lying in bed, Jon sat and took his hand.

"I'm sorry, Jon. I honestly didn't expect him to be back till a lot later."

"Tell me what's going on."

Matt looked at him for a long moment, then nodded.

SIX: WEDNESDAY, SAN FRANCISCO

Jon wasn't sure Boyd would come the next afternoon, but at five-thirty he
heard the garage door rattle open. In a moment the back doorbell rang. When
he answered it, Boyd's eyes were level, giving him nothing.

"I thought you had a key," Jon said.

Boyd shrugged. "I didn't want to intrude."

Jon drew back to let him in. Boyd stepped into the kitchen.

"Boyd, can we talk a minute?"

"I've got to get dinner ready." He turned his back to Jon and began taking
down dishes from the cabinets.

"Please."

Boyd wheeled around. "Look, if a client of mine chooses to mess around with
his friend in the shower it's none of my business."

"I didn't know about you and him. He told me last night."

The steely gaze flickered. Jon couldn't resist a dig. "Aren't there rules
against that sort of thing?"

"Who are you to judge? Thinking you're so generous to pay Matt a visit when
you abandoned him years ago. Coming on to him again, sick as he is. You had
your fun. Why don't you get the fuck out?"

Silence fell between them, broken only by their agitated breathing.

After a moment, Jon said, "You're not going to believe anything I say. Talk
to him. He's waiting for you."

"I'm going to tell him I quit."

Jon shook his head. "You wouldn't do that."

Boyd glared at him, then turned and left the kitchen.

Jon was sitting at the kitchen table when he came back a while later. He
looked up. The younger man resumed his tasks, not looking at Jon.

"Can I help?" Jon asked.

Boyd turned off the tap that he had running and faced him.

"Okay, I was wrong about you coming on to him. Matt told me he was
sorry. Said he was the one I should be yelling at. I did, a little." He
smiled. Jon was caught off guard by his sudden charm.

"I'm sorry, Boyd."

He shrugged. "Why? You knew him first. I guess that counts for something."

Jon said, "I think I knew right away you and Matt were more than just
client and volunteer. I was jealous. I am jealous."

He looked up at Boyd. "Matt and I never got to spend any real time
together. I resent you because you've been there for him. You've given him
all the care and love I never had the chance to give."

Boyd considered this. "You had Matt when he was healthy and strong. Now
here you come again. You're a hotshot professor. I'm a contractor. Why
would he choose me over you?"

"Let's not make him choose. The first time I met Matt I wanted to help
him. I still do. We're both on his side, aren't we?"

Boyd nodded. Jon's spirits lifted. He stood and extended his hand. Boyd
shook it, then smirked. "What?" Jon said, puzzled.

"Too fucking butch. I'm not used to it." He clasped Jon in a strong
embrace. Jon was embarrassed to find himself responding to the feel of
Boyd's muscular body surrounding him. He stepped back and their eyes
met. "Not bad for an old guy," Boyd said. Jon blushed.

"Who are you calling old?"

"You. I like older men. Particularly ones who keep themselves in shape."
Boyd grinned. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really do have to make
dinner. I'll set a place for you too, Professor, if you care to join us."

Jon snorted to cover his feelings. "Thanks. Make sure and put out the salt
shaker, okay?"

TO BE CONTINUED