Date: 6 May 1999 08:52:50 -0700
From: poondu@members.gayweb.com
Subject: Dinnian

				  Dinnian

		    by Thole poondu@members.gayweb.com


				DINNIAN one

     I must be dreaming...  nightmare is more like it; but I cannot
escape. I am back in the coal bin I remember from before when I was a
little kid, when I lived in that old house with the people who called
themselves my foster parents.  It must be after I started to go to school
because I never went in the coal bin before that.  I am naked, hiding under
a dirty blanket, waiting. I know what is going to happen; it happens like
this all the time.
     It use to be, before school, that I would play in the yard, almost
always by myself; sometimes Ma's friends would bring their brats over and
we would play together. Clothing then was a luxury and I would rarely have
anything on but for when we went out or someone came to visit. After they
left Ma would wash me with the hose in the dooryard and I would run around
to dry before coming in the house.
     When they started me to school clothing became even more precious
since it had to be purchased out of the meager allowance for my support
paid by the town and must be clean for school and so I wore less at home. I
had one school uniform and when it wasn't clean I would miss a day. At
home, if it was warm I would go without, saving my thin woolen tunic for
when I needed it, although that was hardly ever my choice.
     Another thing that started about that time was my Da showing me how to
coal the furnace that heated our place.  At first it was a fun thing, just
to be with him for that short time, even when he would hit me for dropping
the coal.  Then as time went on I did the coaling more and more alone and
when he was there with me it was only to beat me or make me work without
the shovel.
     If Ma reported I had done a wrong he would take me to the cellar and
beat me with his belt on my naked legs and ass or he would leave me to fill
the furnace with only my hands to carry the coal.  Sometimes I would sleep
in the coal bin rather than chance his anger by going, filthy and black
with coal dust, up to the kitchen to beg to be washed.
     But washed I would be anyhow come morning.  Ma would hasten me to the
dooryard and spray water from the hose and I would scrape my body with a
burning soap until I was clean enough for school.
     Now I am huddled under the blanket in the corner.  I have covered
myself with coal to hide from his belt. Ma was very angry when I came in
from school. I had been in a fight with some older boys and my school togs
were muddied and torn.  Now I hear his heavy step coming in the house and
her yelling and him calling me. I feel the warmth of my pee on my belly as
fear weakens my control.  The dream is always like that. Even now, eight,
nine years later, when I sleep in a soft bed with warm covers and a Ma and
Da who truly love me I still wet in the night in that dream.
     He is in the coal bin now, stumbling about in the dark, I cry out as
he steps on me and he rips away the blanket and beats me where I lie.


				DINNIAN two

     But this time the waking is different.  The dirty blanket is torn away
and I am awake and I remember.
     The first week of my journey was beautiful. The weather was fine and
the riding both hard and pleasant. I was on my own for most of the summer.
I had come a long way from the near slavery of that first foster home to
the life I now led with these people who had adopted me and now I planned
to ride as far as I could for the summer and learn more about this new
place where I lived.
     Yesterday had started overcast and misty in the high pass where I
camped by the road side but I could see the sunlight on the valley below
where I expected to be for breakfast.  I got going too fast on the hill
down from the pass and the heat of my brakes caused the rear tire to
blow-out. I carried a spare but having to unpack to make the repair made
quite a delay and the wet weather overtook me before I got underway again.
     I was soon soaked and going slow to avoid problems on the sharp turns,
wet brakes don't work any better than hot ones, when a small truck came
quickly out from my right and I slid sideways into him. There appeared to
be no damage to my bike and I was not injured but for being shaken up a
bit. The man got out and apologised and stood in the rain asking if I was
all right.  Then he invited me to his house, back in the wood there, to dry
off and eat.
     His cabin was warm and he busied himself making hot tea and scones as
I stood in the kitchen and stripped off my wet things and took the blanket
he offered.  He plied me with questions concerning my travels as we had tea
together and the last thing I remembered was falling to the floor.
     The tea must have been drugged.  I have no idea how long I have been
asleep, the room where I am is dark.  I am naked still, lying on my back on
the rough wood floor of the mud room with my hands tied in front of me and
to my feet which are drawn up tight against my ass.  He pulled the blanket
away and poured a bucket of cold water on me.
     "Well now my pretty young boy, I trust you have had a comfortable
rest; perhaps when you are up and about you will earn better
accommodations."  It was sure not the same friendly voice that invited me
in for tea and I was afraid.
     I pleaded with him to let me go but he said he would keep me for a
while and I had best shut up if I wanted to keep my tongue. He picked me up
by my hair and set me on unsteady feet. I was bent double with my hands
still tied together with my ankles and he led me back through the kitchen
to a larger room beyond.  It was roughly furnished with several stuffed
chairs and a wood stove and he left me standing in front of a padded foot
stool whilst he went to open the door of a room to one side.  "Let's see if
my wolf-hound likes your sex as much as I pretty boy."


			       DINNIAN three

     A large black dog came up to me and began to sniff and lick me. I
began to get hard as I did in some of my dreams when I would wet. The dog
licked me and nipped at the end of my hard cock and I cried out and he
backed away and the man pushed me over onto the foot stool.  The wolf-hound
went around behind me and licked my ass, his tongue probing in and his
breathing getting louder.  Suddenly he mounted me as if I were his bitch,
his foreclaws scratching my back and his teeth biting at the back of my
head.  I could feel him humping blindly, his cock searching for a hole, and
then he found mine and plunged into my ass and humped me.
     I could hear the man laughing and saying that he would scratch as much
as the dog if I did not stop crying.  The dog was spent and went back to
his corner to lick himself, and the man, who had stripped off his clothing,
was feeling of me from behind. I could feel the juices of the dog running
down my legs and the man's hand spreading the cheeks of my ass. I felt him
press against me and push himself into me and he humped me like his dog
had.
     When he was through he rolled me onto my back and released the chain
that held my hands to my ankles and I lay arched over the stool with him
kneeling between my legs. Now it was my turn he said to me and went on how
excited and hot I must be to get off after that rape of my pretty ass. I
was hard and I did ache with that hardness but I did not understand. He
stroked my legs and loins and put his mouth on my hard cock.  He lifted
under my ass and I found, as repulsed as I felt, a strong pleasure in his
attention and my hips rocked into him and he swallowed me and I held him
there as waves of newly discovered orgasm washed over me.
     He stood back from me, my cum drooling from the corners of his mouth,
"You liked that now, didn't you pretty boy?"  and I nodded a weak agreement
to keep him happy and plotted my escape.


			       DINNIAN four

     He knelt at my head and commanded me to wipe the drool from his
lips. As I did he bade me wipe it onto my lips so to taste myself how good
I was.  I hesitated and he grabbed my balls and squeezed them slowly. I
cried out and smeared my cum across my face and he let go. "Not like that,
fool," he yelled. He squeezed out the dregs of my orgasm onto his fingers
and wiped them on my lips, forcing his fingers into the corners of my
mouth. My first taste of boy-cum.
     He pulled me to my feet and brought me to the table on which was a
drinking glass half full of whiskey which he forced me to drink by the same
torture.  Then he led me to a bed and pushed me onto it.
     I lay quietly on my back as he tied me from corner to corner across
the bare, stinking mattress, trussed, as he said, like a plucked young
capon waiting to be roasted. He went to the table again and I could hear
him pour another tumbler of whiskey that he carried back and drank as he
told me what he had in store for my body. But the whiskey, or the drug that
was in it, was taking hold and I was slipping in and out of dreams and
heard little.
     I dreamt of the orphanage where they took me after that day in school
when the teacher saw the marks of my Da's beatings. I had taken a spill in
the school yard and received an injury on my behind. I don't know what
scared me more at the time, the tear in my school shorts or the blood
running down my leg, but when the teacher, soothing my cries began to
remove my shorts I could only think that I was to be beaten.
     The nakedness didn't shame me and when I saw that she only intended to
wash my hurt I was OK. When she asked where I got all the bruises, in my
innocence I told her. I never went home that day.
     A nurse from the orphanage came to school and took me away and I was
bathed and given clean clothing and installed in a dorm with several other
boys ranging from my own age up to about fourteen. It was over crowded
there and for the first few nights I shared a bed with another boy my same
size. We became close friends and would sleep in each other's arms and it
was a tragic loss to me when he was adopted and left.
     Sometimes a man would give us sleeping pills if we seemed too active
at bedtime or if there had been some excitement during the day that might
keep us awake.
     One night I did not take the offered pill and was awakened later by
the noise of some of the older boys across the room. I watched quietly as
three of them gathered and took off their pajamas.  They stood naked and
whispered and pointed at the other beds finally agreeing on mine.


			       DINNIAN five

     I was scared but knew I was supposed to be asleep so I closed my eyes
and lay back as they approached.  They pulled back my covers and removed my
pajamas. One boy sat on the edge of my bed and held me across his knees
whilst the other two took turns at my ass. They didn't hurt me and it was
soon over. The third one had had his turn and they put me back into my bed.
Then I heard the man come in and ask them if they were through. One of the
bigger boys laid across the foot of my bed and the man had him and then
they covered me and went away. In the morning when I woke still naked it
took a few moments to remember the events of the night and I could not
figure out which boys did it. I never took the pills again but the next
time it happened it was some other little kids turn.
     I was awake again and the man was still standing there talking.  He
had finished his whiskey and climbed on top of me, squatting across my
chest, his cock wet against my lips as he exhorted me to open my mouth.
Finally he reached back and squeezed hard on my balls and when I screamed
he pushed into my mouth.  I bit down. He yelled and hit me then he pulled
out and beat me with his hands all over me. I remember writhing on the bed
and being sick when he hit my balls.  He turned me over and beat on my ass
and thighs and then pushed his cock, dry and burning into my ass and I
passed out.
     It was faintly daylight when I woke.  The taste of cum was in my mouth
and I knew he had had his way with me.  He was awake and dressed and
untying the chains. He didn't remove the chains from me, just from the
bed. He led me to a toilet and watched as I peed and then took me to wait
on him in the kitchen as he ate.  After he let me eat some cold cereal he
took me outside and secured my leg chain to a tree on the lawn. My job as
his slave was to mow the lawn; when I was through with as much as I could
reach he would come and move me. All day I worked at that and when he came
back in the evening I was sunburned and ravenous. He would not let me eat
until I had waited on him and then I got little more than his dog. At least
his dog did not get me that night but otherwise it was nearly a repeat of
the previous orgy. On the second morning I was worn out.  He had sucked on
me several times and ravaged my ass in between.
     This time he tied me in reach of his dog and left me with another part
of the yard to mow. As long as I was mowing towards the dog it had stayed
back but I didn't realize that until I turned away the first time and it
came bounding after me. I tried to run but the chains tripped me and the
dog and I rolled on the ground and he was onto me hot and heavy. I couldn't
get away. When I lay on my back he would snarl and snap at my cock and when
I rolled over he nipped at my ass until I raised it up to give him what he
was after. He then licked me clean and mounted me and I got hard from his
attention and came on the grass.  Eventually I got us untangled and went on
with the mowing.
     Again the night was the same but there were no drugs this time. The
man said I was learning his ways well and we might get along for a while.
I didn't know how long that meant and I did not ask.  I did not talk at all
except to answer his questions and then only so that he would not beat
me. In the night I called out in my dreams to the people who came to adopt
me from that orphanage. My Ma and Da who loved me and who would meet me a
few weeks down the road and we would all go home together.  I had to get
away from this monster.


				DINNIAN six

     That third morning he again tied me outside in another part of the
yard he wanted mowed. After he left in his truck I found I was within reach
of my bike.  In my tool bag there were cutters that I could get through the
nylon cable ties that he used to hold the chains of my slavery.  It didn't
take long to break free and get back into the house for my riding togs. My
bike was OK and but for one last thing I was ready. I hoped he wasn't just
around the corner.
     I went back into the house and spilled some lamp oil around and set a
short candle in the middle of it.  I guess it didn't really matter if I
ever found out if I was successful.  It was the thought that counted. I
just wanted time to get away before any authority attracted to the scene
might pass me on the road.  As much as I knew my foster parents loved me, I
feared what might happen to me if they should be accused of my delinquency.
     I rode for two days.  The first night I stayed in a youth hostel where
I met a group of about twenty kids who were more or less going the same way
as I. The second day I rode with them for a while, getting to know some of
their names and the name of their leader who invited me to join with them.
I chose not to and turned off along my planned route and spent that night
alone in an empty field.  It was a beautiful night and I was happy and
comfortable. But I was lonely after being with them and somewhat afraid
being alone.
     The next day I caught up and asked to be reconsidered. Their leader
took me on and put me up that night with a boy about my age named Davd. We
got along OK and chatted as we went to sleep. He told me some about his
past and I told him some about mine. I could tell he was leaving a lot out
as I am sure he could about me. We were camping out that night but the next
night would be in another hostel.  We didn't get to talk much for the next
couple of days but then, the next time we were back in the tents he asked
me, almost casually if I had any girl-friends.
     Bicycles were parked and tents set in a tangle of lines and tables and
somewhere near thunder boomed.  We had both just come back from the camp
showers and stopped for a minute to stand with some of the other boys and
girls at the sag-wagon where the leaders were discussing some change in the
plan if we might get bad weather in the next few days.
     It was too dark to really see him in the tent but I knew he had taken
off his shorts and I knew from seeing him at the shower that was all he had
on.  I took mine off too and we lay back on our blankets.  It was too warm
to get into them.
     "So, Dinnian, you got any girl- friends?"
     "No, have you?"
     "God no.  Girls are such a bore.  They get you in more trouble." he
said with some emphasis on the end. After a pause he went on, "You got any
boy- friends?"


			       DINNIAN seven

     I know now what a struggle it was for him to ask that question. The
stigma of using the phrase boy-friend in the same context as girlfriend
weighed heavily on his mind and his voice was quiet as the words came out.
     "No, have you?" I asked in return.  His answer caught me off guard but
he went on talking. Telling about his two friends whom he hadn't seen for
the year he was away at school and how he looked forward to spending a week
or two with them before next term.
     "It's hard, the school I go to," he said, "I know there are things
going on in the dorms. Back in the spring a girl left cause she was
pregnant and I know one boy who probly won't come back next term cause of
the labels they've put of him since he made an advance on the wrong guy.  I
don't know what's worse.  You see those two holding hands at the
sag-wagon?" His voice had come back up a bit but he didn't wait for me to
answer.  "We're all divided up you know, separate but equal tents in this
group, but there are two boys and two girls that swop off each night and
they think the leaders don't know.  They know, they're just looking the
other way."
     There was another pause and his voice was quiet again, "Dinnian, you
ever have sex with a boy?"
     I felt a strange stirring in my body and began to realise why this
peer, of all the others in the group, held such an attraction for me. I had
found myself seeking him out to ride beside and eat with even when others
were trying to seek me out and I wondered what it meant.
     "Never cause I wanted to," and I told him of what had happened to me
in the orphanage and the week before.  "In the end," I said, "not to make a
pun, I have to admit, mostly to myself, that I did enjoy a little of what
he did to me, but I'm still glad I burnt his house down. To bad he wasn't
in it, cause even if I liked what he did it was still rape."
     Davd rolled over close beside me and held himself up on his elbows,
our thighs touched and his foot moved against mine, "Can I show you what
it's like between two boys who like each other a lot?"
     He put his head on my chest and began to caress and tingle me.  I lay
there and let the good feelings flow into me and then began to stroke his
back and buns as he kissed his way to my hardon.  When I came it was most
delightful and wiped away the horror of the past. When he was through with
me he sat up and asked if he had done well.
     "After that last week I never thought I would ask anyone if I might
please suck them off," I said to him, "but you have showed me that it can
be fun."
     "Another boy's mouth always works better than your own hand," he said
as he lay back, "even my doctor told me that."


			       DINNIAN eight

     We rode close and lived close for the next several days and I was sad
as I had been when the boy I shared a bed with in the orphanage was taken
away when it came time for us to part.  He would return to his school and I
to mine and we would likely never meet again except through the letters we
both promised to write.
     My Da met me as planned, Ma had stayed home as other relatives had
arrived, and we rode together for two days, staying in hostels along the
way and visiting places as a father and son might.  On the third night
together we camped out by a river and went skinny dipping.  When we came
out of the water it was dark and we picked up our cloths and walked naked
to the tent. I took his hand and stopped him.  "I know it's probly not
exactly right for a fourteen year old to hold his father's hand and cry," I
said through my tears, "but I want you to know that I learnt, this summer,
how much I really love you.  I learnt what that means."
     In the tent we talked of other things and he asked me what else I
learned in my travel.
     "There are some things in this world that when you touch them the
first time they change your life forever."  That was pretty profound coming
from me and he asked me what I thought I meant.  I told him about my sexual
experience with Davd and as I lay there talking I was getting hard just
remembering.  I told him how good it felt, the things we did and the
feelings we shared and he listened. "You're not angry, are you, and you're
not surprised either." I said.
     "No, I'm not surprised, Dinnian," he said, "most boys have their first
sex with another boy, some find it on their own, some few find it with a
man.  Then most go on to girls, tho some do that only with reluctance,
because they want to raise a family and that is about the only way."  He
laughed quietly and reached to stroke my erection.  "And a good thing too
because if the world was left to us men alone there wouldn't be any boys
left to love after a while."
     
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