Date: Thu, 20 Jan 2000 22:34:55 EST
From: M. H. Finn <Arizona_Iowa@hotmail.com>
Subject: Missed opportunity, revisited --- Part I & II... by M. H. Finn

The story that follows is true -- to the best of my recollection; the names and
places have been altered a bit to protect the innocent.  "Bob", if you're
out there would love to hear from you.

MISSED OPPORTUNITY, REVISITED.by M. H. Finn

I attended a College in northeast Missouri in the late 60's and think back
often to a major "missed" opportunity for not only for sex but, who knows.

 "Bob" was the son of a grain farmer that farmed north of town in the
fertile river bottom of the Mississippi River.  I had meet Bob through his
cousins who lived in town and whose father ran a Gas Station.  One of the
employees of the station raced stock cars and I was able to tag along as part
of the pit crew.

Bob, who was 18 at the time and a senior in high school and as I remember
active in all kinds of sports, very intelligent and way above average in the
looks department.  He was 5' 10" about 155 with a brown hair and hazel eyes,
a very tight, cut, athletic body.  Bob always seem to have a smile on his
face or one very close to the surface, if you understand my meaning.  But he
had a life that few have: a large, happy, loving family, 6 kids if I recall,
and I believe that Bob was the oldest; if not then the oldest boy. The
parents were first rate and that trickled down through all of the children in
all the important ways.  The farm was large and successful on its own
merit's plus Bobs father was also the local representative for a large seed
and chemical company.  Bob and his middle brother, who I'll guess was 16,
although both still in high school, basically
ran the day to day operations of the grain farm.  Allowing their father to
work nearly full time at his other job.

I first met Bob at the gas station on a Friday afternoon as we were all
helping to load the stock car for its race over at a dirt track in Illinois.
At the time I was not gay, or at least I didn't think the name applied to me.
I had fooled around with friends, as all kids do, as I was growing up, but
did that count; nah. Bob was great, as were his cousins and siblings and a
good time was had by all.  Bob later invited me to drop by the farm
"anytime" and he would let me play "farmer".  And to be totally honest
nothing, repeat nothing, else crossed my mind re Bob other than the chance
for the city boy to get a chance to ride and drive some very large tractors.
I drove out the next day, after morning summer classes, following the easy
directions that Bob had given me.

I saw Bob and his brother both on tractors in the middle of a large dusty
field as they were disking the soil in preparation for planting.  Bob drove
across the field to say hello and at the same time reminding me to roll up
the windows of my 68 Chevrolet Coupe; dust was every where.  He had me jump
up beside him to ride on the left fender of the large John Deere tractor.
This predates the air-conditioned, pressurized, fancy cabs of today's
farmers.  I learned a lesson that day about wind and dust: last one to get up
in the mornings, and that was normally his brother, eat most of the dust
during the day. Bob and I became fast friends as I rode beside him and we
talked our heads off about both of our lives up to that point and what our
plans were for the future.  I also learned how to operate a large and
somewhat complex John Deere tractor.  At the end of the day I headed back to
town and school to clean off the black earth that had invaded nearly every
pour of my body.  With an open invitation to return any time to
play "farmer".

I was near the end of the week until I could get time to run out to the farm
and ride along with Bob.  We had are normal good time talking and joking
about anything and everything.  About 4:30 in the afternoon they decided to
call it a day as they saw a truckload of brothers and male cousins drive up.
They were headed for what they referred to as a "borrow" pit to swim not far
from where we were working.  A "borrow" pit I found out was a hole where
dirt is dredged up to form a dike (to hold back the Mississippi River from
the spring floods) leaving a ditch to fill with water.  As the soil also had
a lot of sand the water was quite clear and clean.  I remember thinking to
myself that I did not have a suit to swim in but that I would follow Bobs
lead. When we got to the swimming hole after crossing a few fields most of
the guys had stripped down to their jockey shorts and started to hit the
water. I did notice that Bob and his brother stripped completely and I
thought that was fine with me so off came my shorts and in we went.  I
remember that there were comments that we should be wearing something to swim
in but Bob and his brothers called them sissy's, etc., and it was left at
that.  I did note that Bob and I had both been given the same sized dick; at
least what I
could judge at full rest, so to speak.  Not the biggest or the smallest but
about 6-1/2" and average diameter and cut like mine.  It became common, after
our first swim together, to end the day swimming nude at the borrow pit. Most
of the time there would be 4 to six of us swimming and as the heat picked up
it was a great place to cool off.

One day after some rain delayed planting for a few days I invited Bob to come
down to town.  I am not sure who suggested it but in the heat of the day we
drove down to the Mississippi to a park and walked north along the river.  We
had gone a couple of miles when we decided to swim; off came the clothes and
in we went.  Nothing happened, and maybe it is wishful thinking, but I think
he was checking me out and no doubt I was doing the same. Missed opportunity
#1.

A few days later, after classes finished for the morning, I drove north to
again visit with Bob.  When I arrived he was loading the planter, fertilizer
and herbicide tanks on the JD equipment.  For you city types, not unlike
myself, this setup allows one pass through the field planting 12 rows of corn
or soybeans, and adds the fertilizer and herbicide in one pass.  Bobs tractor
was also equipped with a monitoring system that warned him if any of the
product was not be put down at the prescribed levels.

By this time Bob and I had become pretty good friends.  I took my seat on the
left
fender of the oversized green tractor and we were off to plant corn.  I was
most
impressed with Bobs skill as he made maxim use of every square foot of each
field, not only for planting, but to maneuver a very large mass of equipment
(a good 70' long X 35 to 40' wide). From time to time the monitoring device
would indicate a jam and we would stop and fix the problem and continue on
our way.  Bob explained that before the new technology it was not uncommon to
miss planting a number of rows with predictable results.

As it turns out a leak through one of the liquid monitors led to a bit of
horseplay that gave us both an indication of where our friendship might be
headed.  I am not sure who instigated the play but since Bob is not here lets
blame it on him--------- . The monitor, that controlled the flow of what I
hope was the fertilizer and not the herbicide (a scary thought), had a small
leak at one end. Bob grabbed the fitting at the leak in an attempt to stem
the flow.  Instead of wiping his hand on his jeans as I expected he reached
over and wiped it on mine.  Not to be outdone I helped myself to the liquid
and returned the favor.  Then he rubbed it on my arm and I on his and then
the alarm went off on the monitor necessitating a stop to unplug one of the
corn planters.  Bob suggested upon seeing his little brother and father
driving by in the pickup that we get his dad to do a few passes while we take
a swim.  Now this WAS looking interesting. Bob gave his dad a call on
the radio and got his permission to take our swim break.  As we were jumping
in the truck Bobs little brother (10-11 years of age) asked to tag
along-----------------We did swim but with his brother watching nothing
happened------------?. Shortly after I left the farm that day I became
frighten that I had nearly outed myself in a time and location that had a
very low tolerance for the homosexual lifestyle.

I have thought about this event often in the last years-------and now
recognize that I did miss out on some REAL FUN.  In the next installment of
my story I plan to let you join with me as I speculate on what might have
happen had I and or Bob been a bit braver---------------OK since Bob took the
first hit-----I'll take this one-----I screwed up BIG TIME-------All I had to
do was ask, and I am sure that Bob would have taken the plunge with me.

Until next time----Thanks for reading.