Date: Sat, 10 Aug 2002 02:18:03 +0000
From: Java Biscuit <javabiscuit@hotmail.com>
Subject: Free to Good Home, chapter 15

This is a futuristic fantasy involving inter generational
male/male graphic sex and it's not intended for reading
by minors. If you are underage, or this type of material
is illegal where you live, please stop now, and go read
something else!

Feedback, always appreciated, to:
javabiscuit@hotmail.com


Free to Good Home ~ chapter 15

by Biscuit



Sam was hurt and he was angry. It was like being lectured by
my father through the mouth of my brother. The litany of my
faults. I was selfish, immature, and irresponsible.

It started when he followed me into the bathroom.

"I'm just going to shower," I said, hesitating by the tub, not
looking at him. "I won't be long."

"I'll shower too and we can get out of here faster."

"I meant what I said, Sam. I'm not going with you."

I said it and waited for the sky to fall. I heard him sigh, then he
touched me. He was close behind me, his hands on my shoulders,
his chest brushing my back.

"Don't start, Toby. You made the right choice. This boybot thing
that's upset you, " he paused like he was trying to find the right
words, his hands stroking down the sides of my arms. "Remember
how you used to be about your toys?" He sounded like an indulgent
adult talking to a child, trying to be patient.

"Yes," I said, reluctantly, remembering only too well, and
dreading what would come next.

"That's all a boybot is, Toby. You've gotten yourself knotted
up over a fantasy. I didn't come here to help you find the thing.
I came to bring you home, because you need me. Don't start
questioning yourself now and getting all tangled up again. What's
important is this." His arms circled me. "When we get home," he
said, "you'll be all right."

Why was he talking like it was all about him and me? His tone, the
way he was touching me; it wasn't what I expected. I was having
trouble regrouping my thoughts with him holding me like he was,
acting like Tiger had nothing to do with anything.

"Sam, I've got to find him, you don't understand," I started.

"Listen to me. Dad's negotiating my engagement right now.
He's going to announce it at Christmas and I want you to be
there." He kissed the back of my head. "I want you with me.
It's time to grow up, Toby. You'll be next. In a couple of years,
you'll get married yourself and have children. I'll help you, be
with you."

Oh God.

He was stroking the side of my face with his, hugging me. The
weight of his tenderness, his need was staggering. The desire not
to hurt him, not to disappoint him were almost overwhelming.
So hard not to be what he wanted. But his vision of us sharing
the burdens of marriage and family, our intimacy with each
other making it bearable; it was impossible for me.

"I can't, Sam. Even if I didn't need to stay here for Tiger, I
couldn't do it."

I did turn around then. I owed it to him to show my face, to look
him in the eye. "I don't think it's right. Not for me, maybe not
for you either."

God, he was handsome. I could easily imagine him in a contract
with another man, or a beautiful yin boy who would yearn for the
sight of him coming home at night. That man, that boy wasn't me.
Part of me wished so bad that it could be. But it wasn't and he
saw that I meant it. He backed up gradually.

"You know I've always stood up for you to Dad," he said, and
turned away from me toward the sink. He turned on the water
and started soaping a cloth.

"I know," I said. He wasn't going to shower with me. I was
intensely relieved but still nervous, waiting for him to finish
what he intended to say, knowing he wasn't done with me.

"Maybe Dad's right," Sam said.

"What do you mean?" I shouldn't have asked, the answer could
only be painful.

"You're selfish, Toby. Like a little kid. I never used to think so
but now I wonder if he's right. Maybe we did baby you too much,
I don't know." He sounded bitter, his voice tight. "I suppose I'm
more guilty of it than anyone."

It's not like I didn't know my father thought those things. He'd
said them to my face, but to hear Sam passing those judgments
was harder to take. I should have expected it, seeing him grow
closer to our father, more and more like him as the years passed.
But I guess we were vulnerable to each other that morning in a
way we hadn't been in a very long time. The words hurt more
and sounded truer coming from him. I didn't defend myself. I
felt like he had a right to punish me for rejecting him.

"You think you can do whatever you want and we'll always be
there when you need us." He splashed himself with water a last
time and grabbed a towel from the rack, rubbing at his armpits
and his groin. His body was beautiful and I felt like I might be
seeing it for the last time. Maybe he saw my eyes drawn to his
cock. I know I looked down and it's not that I felt desire so
much as an awareness of our closeness; a closeness I didn't know
how to express without giving in to him. I looked up to find his
eyes on me, his expression softened slightly.

"I want to be there for you, Toby," he said. "I would take good
care of you but I can't if you won't let me."

I'd made such a mess for myself. I'd thought I could find a few
days of peace at the farm. If I'd known that Sam was waiting for
just such a summons I'd never have contacted him.

Had I known? Was the awareness somewhere inside me that he
wanted and needed these things from me? I tried to think but
I couldn't. I just knew that what he wanted was impossible.

"I can't," I said. It was horrible to see my brother's face close
down with pain and anger. He looked away from me and dropped
the towel in the sink, turning his back without another word. I
watched him leave the small bathroom. I was too cowardly even
to follow him. I stood rooted to the spot beside the tub, waiting
for the sound of him leaving my apartment.

I'd never felt more alone. I could hardly make myself step into
the shower and turn on the water. I'd thought it would be a relief
when he was gone but it wasn't. My heart was pounding and my
eyes were tearing up. I turned the water on hard and let it beat
down on me.

Was my brother right? I felt like my own judgment was shot to
hell. I questioned everything; my feelings for Sam, for Tiger, my
sanity. My brother's view of me was seductive. It fit me like a piece
of clothing I'd worn for years. The baby. The scared one. Spoiled.
The lure of Sam's arms around me had been almost more than I
could resist. And yet I had resisted it.

I combed through my memories for signs that he'd continued to
want me, desire me, after he'd started high school. I found them;
things I'd discounted before. Lingering looks. His way of touching
me. All those times he'd shown up at my door, I realized now, he
might have been offering himself to me. I'd avoided being alone
with him as much as possible; ushering him to clubs and pushing
him to go with other men. I'd stayed away from home as much as
I could. I think I may have known without knowing.

The hot water did its work, drowning my tears and easing my sore
muscles. I thought of Tiger. I hadn't been able to explain to Sam
how I felt or what it was like to be with him; that Tiger wasn't just
a boybot. Not a machine! Well, he was. But he wasn't. To say that
Tiger was just a mechanical body was no more true than saying I
was only flesh and blood. I believed I was more. And so was Tiger.

By the time I'd gotten dressed I was grimly sure that I'd made the
only choice I could. Selfish or not. Immature or not. Maybe crazy.
It didn't matter. I couldn't live the life Sam envisioned. There would
be no marriage to a woman for me, no children unless I did what my
father had done; contracting for one.

I'd made the only choice I could, but it didn't save me from sadness.
I knew I could never allow myself to break down and reach out to
my brother again.



---------------------------------



Blessed be my creator.
Blessed be Toby.



When the datastream ended it triggered repair. Up to that point
I was conscious. My brothers Ti'jou and Rocket came and went
from the room were I was restrained. Only Roget stayed away,
not wishing to see me again until the alteration was complete.

"Welcome home, brother!" Ti'jou's greeting had been warm
and effusive. He'd hung over me and hugged me as well as he
could in the frame. Rocket stood to the side, his big hand folded
around mine.

My brother boybot's special name suited him perfectly. It was a
shortened form of petit bijou, little jewel. He was a pleasure to see.
Diverting. It interested me then, as it had before, to see my own
face looking back at me, belonging to someone else. It was my face
but it was his own. Curious to observe how the change in coloring
and his varying expressions made it appear different from mine.

Rocket too, varied greatly in my eyes from Roget. I speculated
that his happiness with Ti'jou had given Rocket a face that exuded
delight and kindness. He was quiet but his dark eyes were warm
with affectionate attention when I met them. Often his eyes were
on Ti'jou, who caused them to shine with pleasure.

The boybot's hair was no longer pink, it was blue. A deep cobalt
blue like his eyes, making them appear darker than mine. He wore
the long hair braided like a wreath around his head.

"The little girls did it," he told me. "They like to brush it and style
it. It's fun for them when I change the color."

Ti'jou was employed in a breed house. An approved non sexual
function for boybots. They were preferred waiting staff and in
some cases, like Ti'jou's they were employed as companions for
the young girls. Even sterile males were forbidden to enter the
women's quarters of the houses.

It was Ti'jou who had requested that Roger Davis arrange this
work for him. Though they were free of a programmed need to
be bound to a human companion, the 63s continued to cherish
humankind. Roget's threat to harm Toby, I now knew had been
idle, intended to disarm me. Which it had.

I recalled in their presence the pleasure their company had given
me before. My family was small but it was satisfying nonetheless
to be part of it. I had treasured Roget too, though I didn't desire
him. He was a member of my family. If I had not undergone
trauma, I would have remained among them. Unfulfilled, but
reconciled to the small pleasures I could have.

Useless to speculate. Roget's frustration had made it impossible
for me to remain as I was.

In this house we were shielded by fictitious owners, created to
protect us. There were other houses prepared; Roger Davis had
called them safehouses. False owner identities existed in waiting
for the future.

Eventually, he'd expected that we would fend for ourselves.

I was the oldest, the first. I'd existed for 7.64 years. There is
no correspondence between bot age and human age. We're born
with access to the accumulated files of the brothers who came
before us. Our appearance can be altered but will not evolve. The
body is not static. It regenerates but does not age, it lives until it
is destroyed. Most are reclaimed, their owners receive generous
payment for returning them. A smaller number have been killed
without contributing their files to the whole.

A bot does not fear destruction. The self preserving instinct which
powered me is not a feature of the bots who came before me. No
references to it exist among my files. I'd considered it appropriate
that I cease to exist at my owner's death. That is how many bots
perish, though as many are transferred from owner to owner.


Ti'jou entertained me with stories about little girls at the breed
house. He told stories, too, of his unofficial employment as a
prostitute. These stories disturbed me.

It was illegal activity. Humans were forbidden to prostitute bots
and the law was vigorously enforced.

When I'd asked Roger Davis why it was so, when the bot's body
was created for sexual pleasure, he said it was economics.

"The Guild is a powerful union," he said. "They fought for years
against the manufacture of personal service bots. Think about it,
Tyler, they want to protect their own business."

A lesson in business. I'd learned that the bot manufacturers were
as powerful as the Guild and an agreement was reached between
the two interests. Commercial use of personal bots was prohibited.
My references showed that it did occur at a level which didn't
compete with the Guild. There were owners who charged large
sums for the use of their bots and claimed it was an extension of
their personal use. But Ti'jou's behavior was of the lowest form
of solicitation on the streets.

That he continued to pursue this activity upset me.

"Technically," Rocket said, "it's not illegal for him to prostitute
himself, only for a human to do it." His smile indicated that he
knew this was evasive reasoning. He appeared indulgent toward
his mate's reckless behavior.

"They think I'm a human boy, too young for a license," Ti'jou
said. He too was smiling. "I never ask them for money. They
give it to me!"

His stories of flirting with human men on the street and going
with them to secluded locations for sex had an uncomfortable
effect on me. I was aware of the erotic lure of it. Both he and
Rocket became aroused as he detailed his morning's adventure.

"The man was staring at me on the train," Ti'jou said. "I smiled.
I saw his hard-on even though he tried to hide it. When he got
off the train, I followed him, smiling every time he turned
around."

"So dangerous, Ti'jou," I said. My impulse to turn my head
toward him met with the bindings. The restraint was severe.
Both he and Rocket leaned closer in sympathetic response to
my immobility.

"He's unharmed, Tyler," Rocket said, briefly squeezing my
hand in his. In a gesture that I'm certain he intended to be one
of friendly reassurance, he closed my fingers around the head
of his erect penis, filling my palm with its warm wet knob. I
responded to his thoughtfulness by caressing it. Though I didn't
share the 63s' passion for each other's bodies I was accustomed
to extending caresses for the sake of polite interaction.

"It was very safe, I promise," said Ti'jou. "I let him lead me
to his home. He was very aroused and I sucked his cock, just
like a human boy would do it. He put a twenty credit slip in
my suit pocket."

A slight attraction to his forbidden behavior distressed me. I
would be incapable of doing what he did, unless Toby desired
it. Extremely unlikely. The thought of Toby was irresistible.
His human penis, its 7.2 inches of blessed hardness displayed
to me on a train. Perhaps in the green suit he wore when I saw
him last, its trim tailoring making the contour of his erection
difficult to hide. I saw myself with Toby, instead of a stranger
with Ti'jou. I saw the conjectured image of myself on my knees
and could feel my beloved's cock in my mouth.

"What is it?" Ti'jou asked. He was leaning on me, his small
hand wandering over my chest. My brother bots seemed unable
to restrain touching in close proximity. "I didn't mean to make
you sad, Tyler."

"I'm longing for Toby," I said. I saw both of them take note of
my erection and share a glance of sorrowful understanding. It
was not possible for them to sate the need excited in me by
thoughts of Toby.

"Your human," Ti'jou said quietly. "Roget told us. Try to stay
calm, Tyler. You'll feel better when this is over and you can get
out of this frame. You'll be able to masturbate." He traced the
strap across my chest as he said it.

I knew they pitied me. To them I was perverse, a victim of tragic
circumstance. My dependence on human companionship or my
own hand for sexual pleasure was a source of constant low level
distress to them.

"We've disturbed him," said Rocket. He leaned down to kiss my
forehead. "Don't struggle brother, shield yourself. Your ordeal
will be over soon."

I did so, gratefully. They left me to compose myself.