Date: Sun, 25 Oct 2009 20:01:03 -0400
From: tommyhawk1@aol.com
Subject: The Report on Earth

			    THE REPORT ON EARTH
			   By Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM
		      WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM

     I stepped out of my transport pod and looked around. An alley, not
very clean. My transport pod shifted its appearance to blend in, and soon
was simply another overflowing trash container. I'd have to remember which
one it was when I returned to it.
     Time for my own shift in appearance. I must appear to be a typical
member of the dominant race on this planet, what was it called? Oh, yes,
Earth. Up for its thousand-cycle re-evaluation as to the habits of its
people. To determine if they were a candidate for Galactic Union
membership...or needed to be immediately obliterated to prevent them
endangering the Union. Fortunately, this particular portion of their city
seemed to be very active after dark, it would be simple to arrange a fairly
accurate form of camouflage of both body and garment.
     When my transformation was complete, I walked out of the alley. My
next task was to engage another member of the species in conversation.
     "Well, hello there!" one of the members of the planet said to me. He
walked up and stared at me, not at my eyes, as was the custom of over 90%
of the intelligent species in the universe, but at my mid-section.
     I decided to strike up this conversation by pretending to be a
stranded tourist to his city. It would cover my ignorance on many subjects
as well as help with any odd word choices I might make (even the most
sophisticated language implantation programs will sometimes choose a word
either archaic or improperly used. "Yes, could you help me? I seem to have
a problem here."
     "I can see that!" the human enthused. He was still staring at my
midsection. Just beneath my garment's lower portion, in fact.
     I sighed. Though one does transmute as much as possible, some parts of
one's anatomy must have a certain amount of room in your body. It can leave
one with parts that are too small or too large to be truly
convincing. "Yes, that is a problem for me." I said.
     "You have to be packing a pretty mean sausage in there." he
practically slavered after me.
     "Are you saying you'd like to have an exchange of genetic material
with me?" I said as I realized.
     "I want to what?"
     Try another way of saying it. "You want to fuck with me?"
     The man laughed. "I wish I could take that. No, but I sure want to get
a look at what you're packing. Pay it a bit of attention, too."
     "Ah, I see." I said with comprehension. Well, moral attitudes in such
things differ enormously from society to society, this planet must be one
that emphasized the social bonding that genetic material exchanging
(fucking) would give them. I had to be adaptable to do my duty. "Yes, then
let us go someplace where you may, uh, give my sausage some attention."
Best to use the words he had.
     "Oh, honey, I've got to take you to Babar's." the man went on. "If I
don't show the girls this, they'll never forgive me. A whanger like yours
has to be shared, honey!"
     Even better. This human planned to take me to a place where I could
interact with several of his species. A sizeable sampling was necessary to
allow me to make my evaluation. "Yes, let's go to Babar's." I said. "I am
sure they can help me with this problem."
     "Oh, they'll insist, sugar!"
     "Sounds good, honey." I said and the human put his arm around my
shoulders and led me in the direction of this "Babar's."
     Most races that engage in social exchange of genetic material usually
do so in their temples. The places are usually bright, colorful, joyful
places.
     Not Babar's. The place was dark and poorly lit. Several members of
this planet were there, most of them were busy with each other, talking or
touching each other. All of them were male of their species, as I was of
mine. The voices were all low and the music playing was designed to drown
out any effort to understand conversations of other tables. My initial
thought of this planet was wrong, sexual exchanges on this world were
quiet, nearly guilty things. That didn't jibe with the blatant approach of
my impromptu guide, but individual aberrations did happen.
     My "guide" confirmed this by breaking the rather conspiratorial
atmosphere. "Yoohoo, everyone! I've got someone here you have all just got
to meet! Gather around, girls!"
     "Who have you dragged in here now, Donna?" one of the others called.
     "Help me get this guy unzipped and we'll all see." my guide (Donna? My
research indicated that was strictly a female's name) said. "Just take a
look at this package?"
     The humans around did so and I was soon surrounded by several
humans. "Man, is that real?" one of them asked.
     "I assure you that it is." I said.
     "Whoo-whee!" the man responded. "Hung like a horse!"
     "More like an elephant."
     "Honey, you've got to show us what we've all been searching for all
these years!" my guide spoke up.
     "Yeah, come on, whip it out."
     "Show it to us!"
     "Yeah, bo!"
     "Whoo-hoo, yeah!"
     I was surrounded by these sexually energized humans. I felt it best to
comply with their desires to sexually couple with me and satisfy their
curiosity about the size of my sexual organ.
     I unzipped the garment and spread it open. My own hand was blocked by
my guide's hand, which promptly reached in and hauled on my organ. I'd had
to fold it around several times to make it fit in the clothing, but it
unrolled and flapped out and hung limply as usual, down to just below my
knees.
     "Oh, man, look at that!" One of them groaned.
     "Just look at it."
     "I want to see it hard and ready." another one moaned.
     "Please, dude, can we touch it? Can we work it for you, get it up, get
it hard and horny?"
     I nodded cautiously. "I see no harm in that." I said.
     I was then grabbed by four human hands. That let them hang onto nearly
the entire length of my penis. It's shape had been adapted to a human
equivalent, but the size of it couldn't be changed, so it remained at the
length of perhaps fifteen inches from base to tip. The hands working on it
were much the same as the palps of my own race's and so my prong began to
rise up, filling with my body's fluids, and it stood upright to point
toward the ceiling, and in doing so, I was tapping against my upper
chest. Just a typical size for my species on my world.
     But this was not my world, and so it garnered for me a universal
adoration.
     "Oh, my God!"
     "Would you look at that?"
     "Oh, man, oh, man!"
     "No way is this guy fucking my butt!"
     "Oh, come on, George, you know you'd take it all and love it!"
     "No fucking way!"
     "Aw, man, I gotta get a taste of this thing."
     And that was the word for three of them to suddenly dive against my
prick. Their mouths couldn't possibly take the entire thing within, but one
of them had the tip of my glans covered, and the others were running their
tongues up and down my shaft.
     One of them had gotten down onto the floor on his knees, and his hand
went down and cupped my testicles. That is an especially erotic gesture on
my planet, as it requires two partners to both be sexually engaged and have
one's testicles palped.
     So I gasped.
     "Oh, now we're getting somewhere."
     "I gotta see this monster shoot!"
     "We got us a live one here!"
     "Will it hit the ceiling, or will it just drip out."
     "Big ones usually dribble."
     "I don't know, guys, I think this one's something really special!"
     "Only one way to find out."
     "Come on, boys, let's give this stud a ride he'll never forget!"
     I had hands all over my body now, rubbing and stroking, and their
mouths, too, kissing my face, kissing my hands, and arms, hands rubbing my
legs and my back and my chest.
     And on my cock, those humans were all over it. Running their tongues
and their lips and their fingers, it was like they felt they had to cover
my dong with their bodies. And since no one of them could take the entirety
of it, they combined into a single sort of cooperative organism here, its
single purpose sexual arousal of my body, the goal to make my body reach
the exchange of bodily sexual fluids.
     I didn't have the heart to tell them that the hand still at my
testicles was doing more than all of their tongues and lips combined. The
fingers there were fiddling up and down, back and forth, and my prong was
throbbing as a result.
     The transmutation of my body was complete, I had to react in all ways
as a human would in order to conform, in order to avoid any unintentional
offenses. I was being stimulated sexually, so I would respond in a proper
sexual manner. As close as my body could do it, I would be as a human
sexual partner.
     So I felt the rising of my pleasure as a human should, the increasing
intensity. So much stronger than my own race's pleasure in sexual
intercourse, this was enough to send an intelligent being into the twilight
of their intellect, send them roaring back into their bestial ancestors,
and it was into that abyss my brain plummeted, if any of them had stopped
now, I would have forced them to return, forced them to keep stimulating
me, forced them to pleasure me, I was lost in my rut, I was lost in my...in
my climax!
     "Ah-ah-gah-uh-guh-huh!" I groaned and my transmuted body exploded into
orgasm, and I sprayed, long and hard and powerful!
     There was a chorus of "Oohs!" and "Aahs!" as I burst, one man who had
his mouth on my glans (not the original one, they had been moving around,
sharing my cock among themselves), and he was blasted by the spray, his
face was dripping all over when he pulled away, and the rest of them moved
to shove their faces in the remaining explosions. I came as much as I would
have with my own species, which was apparently a prodigal amount to these
humans, and they were all marveling and expressing their appreciation in my
rather mundane expression of sexual fluid exchange (to myself, at least)
and so I had impressed them all extraordinarily without half trying.
     After that, we managed to shift to more conversational things, and
while I had to fend off a large number of propositions to continue the
sexual fluid exchanges in more private circumstances, but I was able to
gather adequate data about human beings to render my report to my
superiors.
     I had some trouble navigating after the experience, for their pressing
of alcoholic beverages upon me had been rather excessive, but I managed to
eventually find the alley again, and then the trash can which was my
transport pod. It was nearly dawn, so I was able to enter without being
observed, and I got back to my ship and there to undergo alcohol-removal
procedures to permit my brain to function properly again.
     The alcohol left me terribly woozy, though, even so. I staggered
(swayed, actually, upon my pseudo-podia upon which I normally ambulated)
into my superior's presence and he deigned to notice me and said, "I can
see you are clearly exhausted. I will confine this initial debriefing to
its minimum and allow you to simply tell me the single, germane fact about
the humans who inhabit this planet. What are the Earthmen like? Are they
dangerous to us?"
     I managed a smile (a signal of humor) and said, "Not at all. If you
ask me to define the human race in a single sentence, it would have to be
this."
     "Earthmen are nothing but a bunch of horny cocksuckers."

				  THE END
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		  E-mail the Author at Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM
		      WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM