Date: Tue, 31 Jan 2006 00:02:24 -0500
From: Gaco 200608 <gaco200608@gmail.com>
Subject: Two Years To Live: Chapters 1-4

Two Years to Live
By: Gaco
10-14-2005

This story describes how my life could have went, had I made a single
different decision. It is, however, fiction, and almost all except the part
about my medical issues and a few of the dreams are not true. Constructive
criticism is welcome. If gay relationships offend you, then "How did I
manage to start reading this story?" is a good question to be asking
yourself.

This story is owned solely by Gaco and may not be copied by any
means by any unlicensed individuals, groups, or orginazations.

Copyright 2005 Gaco. All Rights Reserved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1

I am Gaco, I am 19 years old, 5'5 103 lbs, dirty blonde hair,
brown eyes and pretty good looking if you ask me. Well... more than I used
to be anyways, and better than I probably will real soon. It all started
when I went to the doctor after my mom was bugging me about getting a
problem with chest pain checked out. It turned out to be nothing, but the
doctor was worried about the medication I was on for my continual skin
problem. We had been to near about 100 doctors about this problem, and each
looked me over, gave me another ineffective treatment and put me on my way
like they had fixed the problem. Finally we had found a doctor who would
give me a treatment that worked like a Miracle. I was so happy to be able
to look and act normal again and feel good. It had been 2 years on this
treatment when I came to a different doctor for my chest pains. My mom
always yapping her trap, let him know that it could be my treatment I am
on. This doctor was extremely concerned about long term side effects of my
treatment. He referred us to another doctor that deals with the stuff I am
on.

After a few days we went to this doctor. He seemed very educated, which was
something I couldn't say for the last doctor I was at. I told him the story
behind all my problems and the medicine I'm on and he thought it over for a
bit, and decided to tell me a story about a man who was on the same
treatment I'm on for a longer period of time. The guy eventually started
having immune system failure as well as adrenal gland failure, which
eventually caused his demise. Granted this man was much older than me, but
just that, he was much older than me and was for lack of a better phrase,
closer to death. I am only 19, just beginning to live, and here I am being
told that I will begin to die in about two years. First my systems will
start to shut down, then something as simple as the common cold could kill
me. When he first told me I though "Damn, sounds a lot like AIDS doesn't
it?" unfortunately, there was nothing and no one to blame for my problem,
other than a shitty hand dealt to me. I had 2 choices, I could continue to
take the medical treatment I was on, and eventually allow it to kill me; or
I could stop taking the medicine, probably live much longer, however the
entire time, wish I were dead.

To tell the truth, the years before I had this treatment, I pretty much did
not live. I had no life, did nothing, never left the house, and never
wanted to either. I was too scared that someone would say something, think
I was ugly, ask me what the deal was with my sick skin, or think I had some
nasty disease because my skin had nasty looking red spots all over it,
along with skin peeling like I had a sun burn, but I didn't. It takes quite
an emotional toll on someone to deal with this. I had no friends beyond the
computer, I knew I could never find a boyfriend because of how hideous I
looked, no one would want to be with someone who had all kind of sick
looking areas on his body.

So here I am, sitting around thinking about the choice that has been laid
out before me. The choices are basically live, or die. Most people would
say anyone in their right mind would choose to live. However, to choose
life would be to never really live. To choose death, however, would be to
choose to make the most of my next 2 years and really live life to the
fullest, even though they are my last. I don't want to die, the thought of
death terrifies me. I do however, want to have love, want to have fun, want
to enjoy in all the other experiences everyone else gets to do. I have now
decided that starting today I will make the most of my last 2 years. I will
go to parties, enjoy the company of my friends, and hopefully enjoy being
in and making love to a boyfriend, and knowing someone cares about me. I
don't want to hurt someone when I die by dating them, but I definitely do
not want to be alone when I die. I will have to make a choice to tell him
of this sooner than later but that can wait.

I jump in my 2002 red Toyota Tacoma and drive off, heading for town. It
signifies the beginning of the end. I am not sad though, because I'm too
excited thinking about the things to come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 2


It has been two weeks now since I made my decision, and two weeks before
that I had been told I had to make a choice to live or die. I'm now
arriving in Atlanta, pulling to a stop in front of a very large hotel. The
windows shine in the afternoon sun and the building looks as if it goes up
for miles. As I walk in I am dazzled by the intricate designs on the
brilliantly red carpet. I walk up to the front desk and talk to the
attendant, give him my name and information and he pulls up my
reservation. While he's entering a lot of information into the computer, I
take a moment to check him out. He's gorgeous, beautiful blue green eyes,
dark, thick curly hair and perfectly beautiful smooth skin. He was about
5'9 and 140lbs; just the right amount of muscle but not too much. After a
few moments I notice he's looking at me a little funny, its then I realize
he had asked me for my credit card and must have noticed me gawking at his
breathtaking form. I gave him my credit card and he rang up the bill and I
signed it and he went over all the normal disclaimers.

 After all of the formalities were out of the way, he called someone else
to watch the desk for him while he showed me to my room. The room was very
spacious and the king sized bed was more than enough for me to sleep
on. The room had a hot tub and a fairly large bathtub. I went to the window
and looked out at the Atlanta skyline, something I didn't get to see much
of in southwest Georgia. Bill, as he had introduced himself made sure
everything in my room was in order. After a couple minutes he asked "Is
there anything else I can do for you?"

I decided to be very bold, and take a chance, after all, what's the point
in living if you don't take chances; I wouldn't have too long to regret my
decision if it went bad anyways. I replied "Well, what time you get off
work? You could hang out with me sometime, I don't have many friends up
here and I don't really want to be alone."

He smiled a beautiful smile at me and said "Well, I get off at 9PM. We're
not supposed to meet guests in their rooms though, so you'll have to go
outside to see me. I'll be outside the main entrance for a few minutes if
you want to hang out."

"I would like that very much Bill, I'll see you then." I smiled.

Bill let himself out and I was ecstatic that I could have been so lucky so
fast. I decided not to get ahead of myself though, because maybe he was
just being friendly. I looked at the clock near the bed and noticed it was
8PM and I had an hour to burn before I went down to see Bill. I decided to
watch TV for a few minutes and before I knew it, it was time for me to go
downstairs. I walked outside and through all the excitement it seems I had
forgotten to move my truck from in front of the hotel. I looked for Bill
and spotted him talking to a police officer who was pulled up behind my
truck. He looked to be arguing with him and when I went over to ask what
was going on Bill took me off to the side and said that the hotel manager
had called the police to get my truck towed because it was parked there for
so long. I was horrified because that would be a great way to ruin my
entire trip. Bill said that he would take care of it though and for me not
to worry. I could tell he had something in mind and decided to let him go
with it.

	We walked back over to the officer who was still writing something
on a pad of some sort, and Bill notified the officer that his father, the
hotel owner has been called to clear this mess up. I was surprised but
tried to not let it show on my face. Once Bill's father had arrived the
officer left and Bill showed me where to take my truck, he blamed it on
himself for not showing me and reminding me in the first place, however I
knew it was my fault for being so caught up in his beauty. When we got back
to the front of the hotel, Bill's dad was waiting for him and asked him
what happened, Bill blamed himself for it and I felt sad that he would do
such a thing for me. Bill's father just said to not let it happen again and
went on his way. Apparently he is a very busy man. Bill and I started
walking down the street and he asked me if I was hungry, by this time, I
noticed I hadn't eaten anything in about 6 hours, since about 3:00 when I
first left home. Bill said he knows a good place and took us to a pretty
nice looking steakhouse.

	As we walked in I noted that the people here were dressed a little
fancier than Bill and I, but he didn't seem to mind. As we waited to be
seated, several people looked at us and started laughing. I didn't know
what that was about, but I don't really care. After we were seated, Bill
said to me "Don't mind them, they are all a bunch of mindless bigots."

	I was surprised by that comment and it seems he has a lot of
animosity towards the people. They did cross me as assholes at first glance
though. I looked down at the menu and I'm willing to be my eyes budged out
at the prices of the food. Bill must have noticed this because he then said
"I hope you don't think you're going to pay, it's on me bud."

This shocked me, and I tried to resist but before I could even say anything
he just said "I'm not going to take no for an answer, besides, I'd like to
thank you for wanting me as a friend. Not many people up here would
consider me as a friend. Not after... not after they found out."

"Found what out?" I asked.

He just said "You wouldn't understand... You would hate me."

I had an idea where this was going, so I retorted "Try me!"

He whispered back to me, almost in tears "I'm gay, ok I said it, now can
you leave and let me cry?"

I just said "No, I wont leave you, it doesn't matter to me rather you are
gay or not, I find you very attractive actually."

He looked up and kind of had a puzzled look on his face, I guess trying to
figure out what I meant. It looked like a light bulb turned on in his head
and he just grinned at me. I didn't want to get anything overly expensive,
but at this restaurant that was kind of hard not to do. Plus, I didn't
really like anything on the menu other than the steak. I got the prime rib,
which priced up to 75$ at this restaurant. It was excellent, however, the
best steak I had ever eaten. I about choked when I glanced at the bill I
almost choked on my drink. Bill just looked at me and started laughing,
like it was funny. I guess his dad owned more than one of these immaculate
hotels to not even blink at a bill like that. He paid, left a generous tip,
and we left.

We decided to head back to the hotel and hang out for a while. We started
walking and walked in the doors, got in the elevator and headed to the 31st
floor. Mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 3


When we got up stairs I let him in my room and he asked what I wanted to
do. All I wanted was to hang out and spend my time with someone. Spending
time with Bill sure seemed like a great thing to do! I flicked on the TV
and plopped down on the large bed, and sunk right down into the
mattress. He sat down next to me, but not as close as I was hoping he
would. He looked to be deep in thought, and after the outburst at the
restaurant I was pretty sure what it was.

"What's on your mind?" I asked.

"Oh nothing..." Came his reply.

"I know better than that Bill. I can see that much, what's going on in
there?" I said, pointing to his head.

"I'm just thinking about you. You're really cool and I... I just wish you
lived here, with me. I'd really like to get to know you better... and have
something last longer than a few days."

These words touched me, yet still made me very depressed. I hadn't wanted
to get so close to him as to create feelings. I knew that there would just
be pain and heart break once Bill found out about my choice, the choice to
die.

"Let's just watch TV for now." I said.

We both laid back on the bed relaxing, and after a bit, I cuddled up next
to Bill to feel the comfort of his arms. They were so warm, secure, strong,
inviting, relaxing. After a few minutes I must have dozed off because the
next thing I know he's trying to sneak out of the bed.

"Please don't leave." I said.

He looked at me sadly and said "I figured I was just boring you and put you
to sleep."

I replied "NO! That is the first time I've slept in a week. You make me
feel so safe. I... Please."

"Ok, but let's get more comfortable"

	We pulled back the covers and got under them, after shucking all
but our boxers. I cuddled back into his arms and almost immediately fell
asleep again. I could tell he was concerned when I mentioned not sleeping,
but I supposed the explanation will come later. I dreamt that Bill and I
were at the beach. We were having a great time and the water was a
beautiful aqua blue. I could feel a connection between us in the dream. It
was like we have always known each other and at some point there were like
matching symbols on the two of us. It was rather odd. Near the end of the
dream, however, there was a cliff at the edge of the beach. It plummeted
about 300 feet into the water. How that cliff got there I don't know,
because earlier the house we were at was right near the water and now its
back a ways and there's a cliff there. After staring in awe of our matching
symbols, something happened. Bill suddenly got angry with me for no reason
and our symbols wouldn't match up, it felt so WRONG when that happened. I
felt as if I were dyeing. Seconds later Bill ran towards the cliff full
speed, and plummeted off the edge. I chased after him and jumped as
well. Amazingly we both landed in the water, we were alive. I then woke up.

	Bill was looking at me when I woke up. I don't know if I was making
noises, talking or what. However, he was looking at me rather oddly. When I
saw the look on his face, I just started to cry. It was an extremely
concerned face. He pulled me close and held on to me. I whimpered "Why did
you have to jump?"

	He looked at me quizzically and I spoke. "I... the dream... you
were there... on a beach with me... and... we broke."

"I know." he interrupted me. I looked at him strangely, and he continued "I
know, because I had the same dream... or at least one very similar... I
heard the ending of your dream, and knew what had happened. You were a bit
loud."

	I shivered and he just gripped me tighter. "How?" I asked.

	"I guess we just truly do have a connection on a different level as
the dream suggested with that symbol thing. Maybe our subconscious is
scared about that link being broken sometime in the future for some
reason." As he said that I felt the blood drain from my face. I guess now
would be as good a time as any to tell him about my choice.

	 After I explained all the details to Bill he just sat there in
shock, not saying anything. I guess he figured that that explained the link
being broken in the dream. It was as if all of a sudden I became 1000 times
more attracted and in love with him during that dream. Now the pain of my
decision was starting to weigh down on my chest. However, I could not
waiver from my plan. The decision had already been made. After my
explanation it seemed neither of us were up for more conversation so we
just laid back down and eventually both dozed off to sleep.

	I woke up again at 11:00 AM. I was surprised to see Bill still
lying there with me as I figured it were time for him to get to work
already. I nudged him awake and asked him when he had to get to work and he
told me he had the day off. I then relaxed and cuddled back up into his
arms and just basked in the comfort and peace of his presence. About 30
minutes passed and I realized both our stomachs were growling and we were
pretty hungry. As we got up out of bed he asked me if I'd like to take a
shower with him. I was surprised by the gesture but was also excited. The
thought of seeing Bill's naked body excited me. Just as I was walking into
the bathroom he stopped me. "We both can't fit in that shower silly." He
said.

"Oh..." I said dejectedly.

He smiled then said "I have a much more comfortable shower upstairs in my
apartment."

	I got dressed, grabbed a change of clothes and we got in the
elevator. He entered his key into the lock inside of the number 51 button
and the elevator started moving. As we got out, I noticed that there
weren't many doors in this hallway and we then arrived in front of room
5105. Bill unlocked the door and flicked on the light. Calling this place
an apartment was an understatement. It was the size of a house! As I
followed him through the place I asked him "You live here alone?"

"Yup, just me... It gets kind of lonely sometimes, but my dad insisted I
take it. He seems to think it will come in handy when I start a family."
Bill said flatly.

"He doesn't know you're gay?"

"Nope, even though all the people around here know, he somehow has managed
to avoid hearing it or something."

	We walked into the bathroom and I was in awe of the immaculate
design of the room. It was so much more brilliant than the boring cloned
rooms downstairs. I noticed his shower was ten foot wide by ten foot
across. Bill must have noticed me staring because he said "I had this
apartment special built for myself after Dad insisted I get one in his new
building. I deiced to get an extra large shower in case I ever want to use
it for... recreational purposes."

"Oh so I'm just another toy for you to play around with?" I said grinning,
already knowing how he felt.

"NO!" He said almost too quickly. "I just wanted us to have room to be
comfortable... You're special to me. For reasons beyond that which I can
explain."

	He then started 2 shower heads in the back corner of the small
room. The shower heads were positioned so that the one on the left side was
pointing into the middle of the corner and the one on the right side was as
well, effectively making one big shower for whoever was in the corner. We
stepped under the warm rejuvenating flow and grinned at each other. As if
reading my thoughts he asked "Want me to lather you up?"

	I nodded yes and enjoyed feeling his hands roaming over and
massaging my body. His hands easily loosened up my shoulders and back
muscles and my body tingled as he wrapped his arms around me to wash my
stomach. I leaned back into his embrace and shuttered with pleasure as it
almost felt as if we became one. After I was clean, I repeated the process,
noting where I got the most response out of his body.

	Once we were clean we got out of the shower and dried off. We then
got dressed and he asked me what I wanted for breakfast. I shrugged and
said whatever. About 15 minutes later he has eggs bacon and biscuits made
for the two of us and milk to drink.

"Thank you for the wonderful breakfast Bill, it's delicious." I said.

"It's the least I can do, for you." He replied looking at me dreamily.

	After we finished I helped him clean up the dishes and we started
to talk. We then moved to the living room and sat down in the couch, in
front of the TV.

"So where do you live?" He asked.

"Albany. It's about 3 hours south of here." I replied.

"Oh, I know the place, I have an aunt who lives down there."

"Cool."

"So why are you up here in Atlanta? Just for fun or do you have a purpose
or?" He asked.

"Well... I just decided that before it was all over... I just wanted to
live a little."

"So you decided that you could come up here, make someone fall in love with
you, and then die on them?" He said, half jokingly.

This however, made me very depressed. I must have made a face or something
cause he then said "Hey I didn't mean it like that its just
that... well... I guess I am falling for you... and it would hurt so much
to lose you... I mean, I just found you."

I felt like I had to get out of there, but he must have read my thoughts
again, or something, because he had already grabbed a hold of me and
wouldn't let me go. I struggled to get out of his grasp, but he wouldn't
budge. Eventually I just gave up and started to cry, and he cried with
me. He was really beginning to make me feel like I should have chosen
life... but it was too late. I couldn't do that. My parents would think me
a coward.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 4


I must have fallen asleep or passed out, because the next thing I knew I
was waking up, under the covers of Bill's bed. As I was just sitting up he
came into the bedroom with a tray of food.

"I figured you would wake up soon, so I brought us some food to eat." He
said smiling a gorgeous smile.

"What time is it?" I asked, not being able to see a clock.

"About ten after five."

"Oh... I wasted your entire day off of work." I said sadly.

"It wasn't a waste." He said softly. "I enjoyed spending the time taking
care of you. While I was downstairs I talked to my dad, and he's giving me
a week off; something about me earning it. I don't care... I just know that
I get to spend time with you."

"I see..." I said remembering why I was in his bed.

"I'm surprised you want to spend time with someone who's just going to get
you attached then leave you." I said completely serious.

"Actually..." He said slowly. "I was hoping that after this week, maybe you
would change your mind."

I thought about that for a moment, but then realized it would take more
than that to change my mind... to suffer for a lifetime.

"Come on, get up." He said almost dragging me out of bed. "There's a lot to
do this time on a Friday night you know! We are in Atlanta after all!"

We took another shower, repeating the earlier process of massaging each
other's bodies. After showering we went downstairs and he spoke again.

"We'll take my car... I know my way around a lot better than you I'm
sure. Plus well... what good is having a dad with a lot of money if you
can't flaunt it?" He grinned.

He led the way to a secluded area of the parking garage and stopped right
next to a 2005 Corvette, my favorite shade of green.

"Wow..." I said in a whisper.

"It's nothing really... I just decided on it after my dad kept pushing me
to get an expensive car, instead of something more modest like I wanted."

"No it's not that..." I said carefully. "This car... its like... my dream
car... the car I always wanted." I then looked back to him "You suck!" I
said grinning. "Lets go."

We got into his car and he started it up. It was purring like a tiger as we
pulled out of the garage and onto the road. As we begun to weave and wind
around the streets of downtown Atlanta he took my hand and just grinned at
me. Before long we arrived at the Mall of Georgia.

"Lets walk around for a while." He said smiling at me.

To my surprise, he took my hand as soon as we got out of the car and didn't
let go as we walked into the front doors of the mall. We visited several
high class clothing shops just looking around, and many of the more
gay-targeted shops as well, checking out the guys inside and the posters
with half naked very attractive men on them. I looked around a few times
looking for someone to be giving us a weird look or something, but no one
seemed to care.

When we walked into a high-tech shop that had all of the new toys and
gadgets I went straight for a Virtual Reality headset I had seen online a
few weeks prior to my arrival in Atlanta. I immediately put it on and was
amazed at the detail and realistic nature of the projections on my
senses. Since there were two headsets Bill also put one on and suddenly he
appeared in my virtual dimension.

"Wow..." Was all he could say.

We kept looking around the store at all the neat toys. Each time I
expressed interest in something he would try to buy it for me but I refused
completely, knowing he had already wasted enough of his time and money on
me. We walked around the mall for another couple hours visiting some
sporting goods stores looking at all the big guns and "Big boys toys" they
had.

Finally after several hours we were back at his car. This time however,
there was something different about it. The windows were all broken out and
the words "FAGGOTS" was painted onto the windshield.

"Oh god!" Was all I could say before I saw the men in masks come out from
behind a nearby van and hit Bill and I in the back of the head with a metal
bar. Everything after that was darkness.

I drifted through the dark for years it seemed. Occasionally I could hear
voices and sounds around me. None of which could I discern as anything in
particular. My thoughts went towards Bill. I couldn't find him in the
darkness. I searched all over, but it just wouldn't turn up anything. I was
lost now. I had lost Bill. What had I done!?

I awoke with a light in my eye.

"He's coming to." I heard a voice say.

"He's in a lot better shape than the other one." Another voice said.

"Lets hope he lives to see these guys put away." I heard a voice that I
could see the owner. It was a cop. Oh god... Bill... He's in trouble!

I groaned and suddenly ten people were hovering over me at once. After the
doctors made sure I was in no immediate danger, the police began asking
questions. They wanted to know everything that happened over the past few
days, some of the information I was reluctant to give, however they seemed
pretty gay-friendly so I tried to keep it as much of the truth as possible.

"How is he?" I asked after the police stopped asking so many questions.

"I don't think we can tell you that son. Health regulations and
all... However, this man is Bill's father and he can tell you... if he
wants." One of the officers said, with a sad look upon his face.

"Hello." I heard a gruff voice say. "I just thought you'd like to know that
because of you my son is in a coma right now and may never wake up. You
fucking corrupted him you faggot!" He started to say more but the police
pulled him out of the room before I could hear anymore of it.

Bill was in a coma. I repeated to myself in my head over and over. It was
all my fault. Bill may die, because of me. Why? I began to sob
uncontrollably. A few monitors in my room began to beep and a nurse came
in, injected something into my IV, and then the darkness came again.

This time, however, I was joined by Bill.

"Hello Gaco." He said sadly. "I'm afraid this is goodbye. I think you
know my condition thanks to my father. I just wanted to thank you for the
great times you gave me over the past couple days. I wanted to tell you
that I loved you, even though I couldn't say it for fear of losing you. I
gotta go now...  I'll always be with you in your heart."

Then he was gone. I broke down crying, unable to stop and the darkness
again covered me. Then, nothing, silence.