Date: Wed, 11 May 2005 15:58:23 -0700
From: nastybottom_in_vegas@yahoo.com
Subject: The Carpenter's Toilet

This story depicts acts of a homosexual nature and include frank
descriptions of watersports, raunch and scat.  If you are underage or
offended by this type of behavior, please do not read any further. If you
like the story, please send me an email: nastybottom_in_vegas@yahoo.com

-------------------------------------------------------

I tend to lead a pretty normal life these days... work, go home, surf the
net for a while, watch a little TV, sleep... repeat. But there are times
when I just have to be a little wild. Actually, a LOT wild. I started out
being a raunch pig early on in life, so every now and then I have to heed
the call of the wild. This particular day was one of those days. I started
out in my usual chat rooms, then posted a couple of "Hook up now"
ads... nothing. Finally I went to a local adult bookstore that's just a few
miles from my house. I looked around the store for a bit and then headed
into the arcade.

The biggest problem here is that there are no gloryholes, the stall doors
are half-height and only cover about a 3 foot section of the center of the
doorway. No playing here. If you are lucky, you can usually spy a hot guy
jerking off but privacy is non-existent. As I walked slowly down the
hallway, I noticed a really hot looking gu, flannel shirt with the sleves
cut off, jeans and dusty work boots. Woof! My favorite flavor. He was
watching a straight porn flick so I thought I'd slow down and maybe at
least get a peek at a straight cock. As I walked by, he glanced over his
shoulder at me and then back to his movie. After making it to the end of
the hallway, I turned back and slowly past him again. This time he glanced
at me and farted. A big old loud man fart. Now's the time to make a move if
I'm gonna. I peeked over the top of his door and made a not-so-subtle
sniffing sound. "Nasty faggot," was his response. But his next action
surprised me a little. He dropped his jeans to his knees and squatted until
his ass was just below the bottom of the door and farted again. This time I
stuck my nose down there and really inhaled his aroma. Woof! This is a man
who can fart! The smell hit me like a brand new bottle of poppers. When the
smell was gone and I had lingered there as long as I dared, he stood back
up, zipped his pants and walked out.

I followed him dutifully and hoped that what was waiting for me on the
parking lot was not an ass kicking. He walked over to a Ford pickup truck
with an "ABC Carpentry" sign on the side. The truck looked like it had seen
its better days. He got in, rolled down the window and spoke as soon as I
got to the door. "Listen up faggot. You got a place close by?"

"Yes," I answered.

"You eat ass?" he asked.

"Sure do," I said, my dick beginning to swell.

"I am following you to your place. You go in, lay down on your back and
wait by the door. I'm gonna walk in and sit down on your face. You're gonna
eat my ass real good while I jerk off. After I cum, I'm gone. Got it?" This
guy was pretty fuckin' sure of himself.

"Yes," my heart was pounding. "I have a rim seat," I offered.

"What's that?" He said, as if I was beginning to wear out his desire to
communicate.

"A toilet seat on legs with my face under it," I replied, trying to use as
few words as possible.

"Fuckin' nasty faggot! Do it. And don't fuckin' talk to me while I am
there." With that, he rolled up his window and started his truck.

I went to my car and started it up, my hands shaking. As he said he would,
he followed me to my place. I went in, leaving the door slightly ajar, ran
into my closet and grabbed the rim seat. Took a deep hit of poppers and
laid down in the entryway with the rimseat over my face.

About a minute later the hit of poppers was doing it's job, my heart was
pounding in my chest and my cock was rock hard and straining in my
shorts. The door opened and he walked in. He strode up and looked down at
my face in the rimseat. I felt as if he was looking at a public toilet,
checking the seat for piss drops or floaters left by some nasty
fucker. Satisfied, he turned his back to the seat, dropped his pants and
briefs to his ankles and started to squat. As he came in for a seat, he
farted again, grunted and settled down on my face. I took a few deep sniffs
and started to lick. I knew that this guy meant business and I was there to
serve him.

His ass was basically pretty clean. Not freshly washed, but not shitty
either. I started to lick and suck like there was nothing else to live
for. He just sighed real deep and settled in for the ride, slowly stroking
his cock. This went on for a while and he started to grind his ass onto my
face. I ate him like there was no tomorrow. I tried pushing my toungue in,
but his ass was fuckin' tight. His breathing got harder and he really
started riding my tongue. He came with a loud grunt, took the jizz from his
hands and wiped it into my hair. After his hand was clean, he stood up,
pulled up his jeans and zipped them.

"Don't say a fuckin' thing fag. You like that?" He asked.

I nodded.

"You want that again sometime?"

I nodded again.

"Fugures. Get up, write down your phone number. If I call, you only tell me
if I can come over or not. If I do, you do exactly what you just did. Got
it?"

I nodded again and went to jot my name and number on a scrap of paper. He
took it and the pen from me. I watched as he took the paper and scratched
out my name and wrote "faggot toilet" on it and pushed it into his
pocket. He turned and walked out the door, leaving me to jerk off laying in
the floor under my rim seat.

-----------------------------------------------

About a week later, I finally got the call I was waiting for.

"Hello," I said.

"Faggot, you free?" This was a man of few words, but the ones he used had
me fucking climbing the walls.

"Yes." I replied, once again beginning to feel my heart race.

"Fifteen minutes." Click. This guy was in control.

I went to the closet, pulled out the rim seat, went to the fridge to get my
poppers and unlocked and opened the front door a bit. The next fifteen
minutes seemed like a lifetime but finally I heard him coming up the front
walk. As soon as I heard him, I took a deep hit of the poppers and mentally
prepared myself. He walked in the door, turned and closed it. This time he
barely looked at me before turning around and dropping his jeans to his
ankles.  He kinda stretched a little as if showing off his hot, hairy
ass. I definitely appreciated it.

As he slowly began to squat his ass cheeks parted to reveal the light brown
streaks of a poorly wiped asshole. A thousand thoughts ran through my
head. "Was he aware how dirty his hole was?" "Was he doing this on purpose
or did he just not care?" Either way, I was in pig fuckin' heaven! No fart
this time, but the smell of the shit streaks and sweaty ass funk got me
rock hard. Just like the last time, as soon as my tongue started to do its
dance around his tight manhole, he started stroking his cock.

I made sure he was aware of what I was licking off. I did long flat strokes
on both sides of his ass trench, cleaning the crevice completely, then
zeroing in on his sweet hole. This time as I tried to get my tongue in
there he pushed out a little and released a small fart into my mouth. The
vibrations against my tongue were a little startling, but I quickly sniffed
the smell up to thank him for allowing me to be there for the birth of his
amazing fart. As I did this, he moaned so deeply that I felt the vibrations
course through his body.

He picked up the pace of his jerking and I thought to myself, "I am fuckin
attached to this hot-as-shit straight guy with my mouth connected to what
most people would consider the most disgusting part of his body." I was
definitely okay with that. His jerking and breathing continued to quicken
until he finally came and as he had done before reached under and wiped it
on the top of my head.

He stood up, turned around and said, "I gotta piss."

In silent response, I simply opened my mouth. His stream started and hit me
squarely on the tongue. I gulped his fast-flowing stream to keep up with
him. He didn't have to go slow with a toilet, why should he go slow with
me. His piss slowed to a trickle then he shook it, flipped it into his
briefs and pulled up his jeans.

"You want it again?" He asked.

I nodded.

"Next time, have toilet paper." He said then Zipped up and walked out the
door.

"Fuckin' amazing!" I said to myself as I began to stroke my own cock.

--------------------------------

About another week passed and he called again. This time, amazingly enough,
the communication was even shorter.

"Fag." He said.

"Yes." I replied.

"Fifteen." He said again and hung up the phone.

Now we were beginning to settle into a routine. I did my usual. Pulled out
the rimseat and poppers but as he had instructed before, I also grabbed the
toilet tissue stand that stood in my bathroom. It's one of those free
standing ones that hold the roll without being screwed to the wall. I
wondered what the hell he had in mind. I knew I didn't have to wait long
for the answer cause he was gonna be here in a matter of minutes.

I laid there, letting the poppers do its thing again and wondering to
myself what his deal was? Why didn't he wanna talk? What was he planning to
do with the toilet paper? Would I ever get anything but his ass on my
tongue? I heard him coming up the walkway so I took another deep hit of
poppers. My brain was reeling with the effects of the poppers as he did the
usual cursory glance at the "toilet." I noticed that he had a pussy
magazine tucked under his arm just before he dropped his pants. He turned,
grabbed his butt cheeks and pulled them apart so I could see that his ass
wasn't just streaked a little, this time it was downright shitty. Was he
giving me a chance to tell him no?

After about 10 seconds of him showing off his shitty pucker to me, I guess
he realized I wasn't going to wave him off so he began to descend on the
toilet seat. Just before his ass made contact with my face, he stopped and
hovered over the seat. What did he want? I took a guess at what he was
wanting for me to do and sniffed really deeply, inhaling the masculine
aroma of his filthy ass. I knew I needed a little more help on this one so
I quickly raised the poppers bottle to my nostril and inhaled deeply. As
soon as the rush hit my brain, he plopped his ass down squarely on my
mouth.

The sudden blast of the poppers-induced euphoria and the taste and smell of
his shitty asshole hitting my mouth sent me right into orbit. I stuck out
my tongue and began to lick the filth away like it was my last meal. He
settled in and I heard him open up the pussy mag and start stroking his
manly cock.

The smells of shit and sweat were overpowering. To him it must have smelled
like he was in a bus station restroom. I was now going deeper than my brain
had ever let me go before. I was eating his shit. The only thing deeper
than this would be if I were eating a solid turd directly from his hole. I
had a feeling that was in my future with this guy. I wasn't sure I would be
able to handle it, but for this man I was willing to try.

As usual, after my cleaning chores had been done, I really stared to work
on his hole. I was determined to get my tongue up his shit chute. As my
tongue began its assault on his hole, he reached back, spread his cheeks
apart a little more and ground his hole down onto my face a little
harder. He pushed out and my tongue finally slipped into his bitter tasting
shit canal. He almost cut the tip of my tongue off when his asshole tried
to slam shut against the intruder. I wasn't giving up though and dug in
deeper. He moaned with obvious pleasure and began stroking his cock harder
and faster.

He dropped the magazine to the side and began to concentrate on the task in
hand. Hid hand was flying on his cock and the nuts that had been smacking
my forehead began to tighten up. His breathing was labored and he rocked
back and forth on the seat and my face. This was gonna be some orgasm. Just
as he was about to cum, he jumped up off the rim seat, spun around and blew
his load all over my face. I quickly opened my mouth to catch as much as
possible. He slowed his stroking and finally just held his cock there. I
knew that he needed to piss and opened my mouth and began to gulp as the
piss flooded my mouth. After his stream subsided, he shook the remaining
drops out of his piss tube. Then he turned around, grabbed some of the
toilet paper and wiped his ass with it. Then he reached down toward my face
and stuffed the paper in my mouth. With that, he gave sort of a half smile,
zipped up and walked out the door.

After I stroked my cock, sucking on the spent toilet paper. I came with a
force I had rarely felt before. This man was taking more and more control
of my mouth and my mind.

"Holy shit! No instructions this time." I thought. "He is coming back isn't
he?"

As I came down from my orgasm, I pulled the rim seat from over my face and
sat up. That's when I noticed he had left his magazine behind. "Men can be
so absent minded when they have just cum," I chuckled to myself. But as I
went to pick up the magazine, I noticed that there was a piece of paper
folded up inside, sticking out the top. I pulled it out, opened it and
found that it was instructions for our next meeting.

It said:

"Fag, I like using your shitter. I will be here at 2:30 tomorrow. Leave the
door unlocked but be in your bedroom with the door closed. When you hear
the doorbell ring, get to your place. I will come in 2 minutes later."

"What the fuck?" I thought. "Why the sudden change in the order?" At least
I'd only have to wait till tomorrow to find out.

----------------------------------------------

The next day, I was on pins and needles waiting for 2:30 to come
around. When it finally did, I opened the front door and went to my bedroom
as told. I took my poppers with me, not knowing what was going to happen. I
heard the front door open and his footsteps around the entry way. He was up
to something and I was beginning to get excited wondering what it was. I
heard shuffling and finally about 5 minutes later, I heard the doorbell
ring. I quickly went into the hallway to find a large folding panel
structure completely enclosing the front door. There was no way to get
inside the structure he had placed there except through a rectangular
opening in the center of the wall opposite the door, near the floor.

Knowing that time was running out, I laid on my back and slid into the
opening. I found myself looking out of a toilet seat into what appeared to
be a public mens room, complete with stained and grafittied walls, ceiling
with a bare lightbulb, toilet paper dispenser and what apeared to be a real
toilet bowl that my face was currently peering out of.

My mind was reeling, taking it all in. As the door started to open, I
grabbed the poppers and took a full deep hit. This time, when he walked in,
he really did look like a hot caprenter walking into a public shitter. He
took a look around and scratched himself. He undid his belt and fly and
hauled out his cock. He stroked it a few tines and then dropped his
pants. He grabbed one cheek, pulled it aside and farted. I swear I hear him
sniff it. This was one nasty fucker.

He turned around and began to sit, as his cheeks parted I saw exactly what
I expected. Ass that hadn't been wiped, smeared with sweat and shit. I
opened my mouth and prepared to accept my gft from him. This time there was
no pause to let me back out. He just sat down and farted right into my open
mouth. The sound reverberated in the new closed up toilet he had built for
me. I sniffed it up then started to give his hole the attention it
deserved. Again, he started to get really into it, pushing out his hole to
meet my tongue as he began to jerk his cock. He grunted a little and that's
when I felt it. A turd was just inside the opening of his hole. I guess he
sensed my hesitation and halted its descent. What should I do? Can I handle
this?

"Take it," I heard him say. "You'll be glad you did."

 I took the bottle of poppers into the bowl with me and took a deep
hit. When the rush hit, I lost all my inhibitions. I pressed my open mouth
around his hole, forming a seal and teasing the tip of his turd with my
tongue. I guess that was all he needed and he let the shit start to slide
again.

He let about half an inch drop into my mouth and pinched it off. So, there
I was with a turd in my mouth and nothing to do but swallow it. I fought
the urge to puke, but gagged as let it slide down my throat. After the
initial disgust at what I had done, I resumed my licking chores. He push
out a little, but didn't shit anymore. I licked his pucker clean for him
and he began to jerk his cock faster. Then he suddenly stood up and faced
the wall.

"What the hell...?" I thought.

He leaned into the wall and put his cock through a hole. "Holy shit, this
guy had brought his own personal glory hole!" Understanding the
implications, I quickly slid out of the toilet space and crawled around to
find his cock wiggling through the hole. I wasted no time sliding it into
my mouth. It was amazing. Nice and thick, cut and tasty. I slobbered all
over his meat and began a nice slow sucking rhythm. It didn't take long
before he began to work his cock in and out of the hole. He picked up the
pace and finally blew his load right into my waiting mouth.

After I had licked and sucked him clean, he pulled out of the hole and
turned back to the toilet. He stood there for a few seconds and I finally
got the hint. I crawled back and took my place in the toilet. As soon as my
face was in the hole, it was rewarded with a hot stream of piss all over my
face. I opened my mouth and he finished up, pissing on my tongue. I drank
it down as he finished. After he shook the remainder out of his tube, he
turned back around and sat back down.

I realized that I could jerk off now, and he wouldn't really know it. So I
pulled out my cock as I continued lick his hole. I started to jerk it and
was getting close fast. I started to breathe heavily and his ass lifted a
little. Just as I was about to cum, he dropped the remainder of that first
turd right onto my face. I heard him grab some toilet paper and he raised
his ass a little more and wiped it. He dropped the paper on top of the
steaming pile he left on my face and stood up. I watched as he pulled up
his pants and zipped.

"Good fag. Very good," he said. He closed the lid on the toilet and
left. Here I was in the dark with his shitpile sitting on my face and the
top decorated by his used shit paper. I was his toilet and strangely, I was
okay with that. I never thought I would be here, but I am. I laid there for
a few minutes, thinking of the position I had put myself in and slowly
began to jerk my cock, still sticky from the first load. I came hard,
shivers racking my body and laid there until I was ready to go again. I
have never been so turned on in my life. After I shot my third load, my
nuts were drained and the carpenter's shit had gotten cold on my face. I
slid out and sat up, allowing his pile to fall into my hands. I walked into
the bathroom and dropped it into the toilet. I looked up to catch myself in
the mirror. His shit was streaked across my cheeks and chin. I jerked off
one more time looking at myself in the mirror and using my fingers to smear
his turd streaks onto my tongue.

After I was done and had washed my face and brushed my teeth, I walked back
into the entryway. "What the fuck am I gonna do with this restroom he
built? I can't just leave it here." I looked closely at the construction
and realized it was built for quick assembly. I guess it had to happen in
that 15 minutes. Before I took it down, I threw on some jogging shorts and
a t-shirt and walked around the house. When I stepped through the front
door, I was immediately transported into a seedy and dirty public
restroom. The toilet itself was carefully constructed to look just like the
real thing. It must be bizarre looking down into it and seeing a human face
where the drain hole should have been. Everything else, the industrial gray
paint color, the graffiti, even what looked like piss splatters on the wall
seemed too real to be manufactured. Even the glory hole appeared to be well
used. Thats when I realized, it even had a smell about it. These walls WERE
real. They must have once been in a real public restroom. He had taken the
walls and made them portable and fashioned a toilet to complete the
scene. This guy had a hardcore public toilet fetish and I was only there to
catch the turds and lick his hole clean. The glory hole was just a bonus
for me.

I sat down on the toilet seat and was amazed by how real the entire scene
felt. As I sat there, I got the natural urge to piss and shit, so I just
let go. "I'll clean the tiles after I'm done," I thought. I sat there in my
reverie for a few minutes and then absent mindedly reached under and wiped
my hole, letting the paper fall into the toilet.

I got up, figured out how the thing went together, dismantled it and
strored in in the garage, cleaned up the tiles and took a nap. I have never
slept so well.