Date: Fri, 19 May 2000 18:38:25 -0700 (PDT)
From: Bill <bil47@yahoo.com>
Subject: Joey and Bill: Bill's Journal  - 1966 (b/b; b/t)

Bill's Journal - 1966

[A totally fictional account, featuring boys from my youth.
All names changed, other than my own.]

Joey and I made an unusual pair that summer so many years ago.
I was a shy, nerdy 15-year-old; about 5' 9"; eternally dissatisfied
with my plain looks and persistent pimples. He was a 12-year-old
golden boy; probably no more than 5'2" tall, outgoing, and better
looking than those boy models in the glossy clothing catalogues.
But for several weeks that summer we were best buddies and,
miraculously, partners in an exciting bond of boyhood sexuality.

I had never had any close friends. Oh, there were guys at school
and in the neighborhood that I talked to, but no one that I'd ever
really connected with. Like I said, 'shy, nerdy, homely, lousy
self-image'; that was me. As summer began, it looked like it would
be a boring lonely grind. I had pretty much cornered the market on
grass cutting and yard work in our small outer-suburban neighborhood.
A few hours of work each day kept me in pretty good spending money.
But I had no girlfriend to spend it on; no buddies to go to the movies
with. There was just reading, TV, and... well, of course there was
masturbation. I was pretty proficient at that last one, averaging about
3 times a day. Often it was just a "quickie", but I was  learning how to
make it last too. Lying there in bed with a bottle of hand lotion,
bringing
myself close, then backing off. It was at these times that the elaborate
sexual fantasies played out behind my closed eyelids... sometimes about
girls from school or female celebrities - the kinds of images I felt I
was SUPPOSED conjure up. But much more often, especially as my
pumping hand entered the home stretch in the race toward orgasm, it
was sexual images of males. Hard cocks, sucking, ass-fucking.  Was I
gay?... Maybe I was bi... Maybe it was just a stage I was going through.
All I knew for sure was that I felt a special erotic urgency whenever I
thought about having sex with a guy. Of course, it may have been based
on my real-life experience, limited though it may be. I had never come
close to doing anything with a girl, but for one week, back when I was
13, I had an extensive lesson in what two horny boys can do with each
other, and the memories were a constant source for my masturbation
fantasies.

The boy was my cousin David, who was 14-year-old at the time.
His family lived about 2000 miles away, and we only saw each
other every few years at family get-togethers. The summer after I
turned 13, though, our two families decided to share a small rental
cottage at the beach. David and I were roommates, sharing a double
bed. (Neither of us had siblings.) I was sexually naive; David was
definitely not, as it turned out. And while I was fairly reticent, he
was more than happy to take the lead. That first night as we lay in
bed, he quizzed me on my sexual awareness and probably awarded
me about a 1-1/2 on a scale of 10. Well, my education began then and
there, with the exchange of whispered words and exciting touches.

With his amiable encouragement, we ended up naked and hard,
feeling each other's cocks and rubbing them against each other.
He was surprised that I didn't know about jacking off, since I
had a 5" boner and some pubic hair. By the time we finally
went to sleep that night, I had watched him shoot his load and
had stroked myself to my first ejaculation, amazed by the
incredible sensations of pleasure that I could produce. As the
week went on, I happily followed while David led. Before
long, he was giving me lessons in cocksucking, bringing me to
an earth-shattering orgasm. When I reciprocated, I became
instantly enthralled by the feeling of his adolescent erection
sliding through my wet lips and along my tongue. We sucked
and jacked each other every night and sometimes during the
day as well. When we 69ed for what seemed forever, by the
light of a full moon and to the sound of the rumbling surf, I
thought this was what heaven must be like.

By the fifth night, my education moved to a new level.
David brought out a jar of vaseline after we had locked
the bedroom door and turned out the lights. As I lay
face-down on the bed with a pillow under my mid-section,
he was lubing my asshole and explaining how good it would
feel when his 6" cock slid into my body. Well, to tell you
the truth, it hurt like hell when he first pushed against me.
So he massaged me some more with his fingers and tried
again. This time he got in and I gritted my teeth. But the
longer he fucked me, the more I grew to like it. He never
asked me to fuck him (and I was too shy to ask), but he
plowed my ass each of the last 3 nights and gave me an
excellent blow job each time as my reward.

You'd think I would have found someone back home to take
David's place as sex-partner, right? Wrong! I was too shy
to seek out a guy who might be interested; too scared of
being labeled a queer if I came on to someone who wasn't
interested. But of course I became a dedicated solo
masturbator, stroking away as my brain played scenes
of David and me... or me and some cute guy from
school... maybe three or four of the handsome preppie
jocks from my class, lined up, making me pull down their
jockstraps to suck them off one after the other... or
sometimes just an anonymous male body, fucking my ass
or thrusting a cock into my hungry sucking mouth

But enough digression. This story is about Joey!

He moved in, two houses down from me, at the beginning
August. One thing was immediately apparent - he wasn't
shy. I was shooting baskets in my driveway when he
bounced out of a car with Pennsylvania plates, popped
into their new house for maybe 5 minutes, and then bounced
over meet me. His infectious enthusiasm cut right through
my shyness, and in no time we were talking like old friends
and playing some one-on-one basketball. Even though I was
a head taller than him, he was a better shot, so we were pretty
evenly matched. In the heat and humidity of the Carolina summer,
we took off our shirts, and I found it difficult to keep from staring
at Joey. First of all, his blond hair, blue eyes, and incredibly cute
face made him drop-dead gorgeous. And the sight of his smooth
and lightly tanned torso, showing the beginnings of muscular
development, and his tight ass squeezed into skimpy cut-off jeans,
sent sensations through my brain and body that I struggled to suppress.

It wasn't as if I pursued Joey. He was the one who was always
coming over to my house to hang out, or asking if he could help
me with my yard jobs. I guess a lot of 15-year-olds would think
he was a pest. I sure didn't! He had an ability to carry on a
conversation with minimal input on my part - which was a good
thing, since I was socially awkward and often at a loss for things to say.


This was the first time I'd ever really had a friend like this. If
anything, I guess I was surprised he wanted to be with me! He
reminded me so much of the boys in the "prep clique" at school...
handsome and self-confident guys about whom I had this weird mix
of feelings (envy, disdain, admiration, resentment)... guys who were
sometimes objects of my secret sexual longing, but who I never
had the nerve to even talk to. And here was Joey - a 12-year-old
version of these icons - and he seemed to admire ME! It certainly
helped that there weren't any other guys his age in our immediate
neighborhood, but it still surprised me.

We were together just about every day. He looked to me to take
the lead in what we would do, and I found it was fun to say 'lets do
this now', and he would always agree enthusiastically. I showed him
all the interesting places in the nearby woods and the abandoned
farms that eventually became suburban developments. We also talked
a lot, especially about our shared interest in SciFi books. We played
cards and board games, watched TV, rode bikes. Like I said, he
helped me with my yards, doing the weeding and edging that I hated,
and I shared the money with him. I was especially happy when we
would take off our sweaty shirts at the end of a job and sit in the
shade drinking a soda. Sometimes we leaned against each other, and
the touch of his skin inflamed my senses. One time, we were lying on
beach towels in my back yard, working on our tans, and we spread
suntan lotion on each other's backs. The pure sensuality of my hands
on his slippery skin (and his on mine) almost drove me crazy with desire.
I just couldn't believe how attracted I was to the physical beauty of this
12-year-old boy. But I convinced myself I could never do anything
about it. After all, we were three years apart in age, he was undoubtedly
prepubescent (we never talked about sex), and he was probably straight
anyway.

But thoughts of him increasingly filled my imagination as I lay on my
bed at night, my right hand moving up and down my straining cock,
two fingers of my left hand pressing into my asshole. Thoughts of him
naked, of taking him in my arms in a loving embrace, of kissing his full
lips... God! I had to stop this... it wasn't right!  But I couldn't stop.
Thoughts of him overwhelmed me. Fantasies of us clinging together
naked in my bed, hands exploring, tongues entwined, my fingers
playing with his little-boy dick and his small hand stroking my
adult-size cock energetically....

My masturbating hand went into high gear, and the words came out
of my mouth almost involuntarily: 'I love you, Joey... I love you...
uhhhh! uhhhh! ohhhh!! Oh God, yessss!!' I moaned as strings of hot
white fluid shot from my straining erection onto my chest.

Then toward the end of August Joey asked me if I wanted to go with
him and his parents to the beach for a day-trip the next day. He had
already asked his parents, and they consented. It would be a long drive -
maybe 3 hours each way - but I quickly agreed. We left in the morning
and Joey and I talked for a while in the back seat. Then we decided to
read for a while and rode in silence We drove to a  state park area that
had lifeguards, a snack bar, umbrellas and beach chairs to rent, and a
public bath house where we could shower at the end of the day to get
the salt and sand off our bodies. We played in the surf, jumping the
waves and rough-housing in the chest-deep water. He had surprising
strength in his slender body; he would undoubtedly be a good athlete.
The opportunity to hold Joey's body was tremendously exciting, but I
longed to reach into his bathing suit and touch his secret places.

After a while we were joined by a couple boys - identical twins, actually
-
who were about Joey's size, and Joey graciously included them in our
play. The more fun Joey had with the twins (who were almost as cute
as Joey), the more I felt like the 'odd man out'. I told Joey I wanted to
sit on the beach and read some, and he continued his play with the other
boys. My attention was focused more on the frolicking 12-year-olds
than on the pages of my book. As they stood close together in a circle,
out beyond the breakers, talking and giggling and sharing secrets (maybe
touching each other underwater), I felt self-pitying jealousy, and also
a deep yearning to once again experience those innocent pre-teen days.

Eventually, Joey coaxed me back into the action, and I had fun
swimming and playing frisbee and building a giant sand castle
with him and the two other boys. At about 5:00 in the afternoon,
Joey's parents told us to gather our things and get dressed back
in the locker room of the bath house. The showers were totally in
the open, and I eagerly anticipated the opportunity to finally see my
young friend naked. In fact, I looked forward to him seeing me too,
because I was fairly proud of the way my body looked. We went
directly to the showers, still wearing our wet bathing suits, and
there were a couple of men and younger boys there - all naked.
I pulled down my suit and began to wash off, facing Joey. He slowly
pulled his suit off too, and my heart started to beat faster each time
I glanced at him. Although his crotch was devoid of hair, he had
penis that was at least as long as mine - maybe 3" soft, though thinner -
and a nicely-filled ballsack that was pulled up some from the cool sea
water. He knew I was checking him out, and I knew he was doing
the same. We each smiled, but I was very self-conscious about my
desire to look at his crotch. Also, I knew I  was in serious danger of
getting an erection, especially when Joey started slowly soaping up
his dick and balls, and I forced myself to look away and think about
something else and then get dressed quickly.

After stopping for dinner at a restaurant in the beach town, we started
out on the long drive home. As darkness fell and the ride droned on,
Joey fell asleep with his head resting against my arm. Hoping his parents
wouldn't notice (or care), I put my arm across his shoulder and held him
close as he snuggled against me. Memories of his naked body floated
through my head, and I used my free hand to gently stimulated my hard
cock through my pants.

That night, in my own bed, I was tired and horny and settled for a quick
jack-off before falling to sleep. I promised myself a slow, drawn-out
masturbation session in the morning. My dreams, however, were alive
with sexual images. The only dream I really remember was the last one
before waking. Joey and I were naked on the warm beach, frolicking
in the ocean surf. The twins from the beach were there too, their tanned
naked bodies glistening with water. I brazenly caressed each boyish body
as they took turns stroking my rigid erection. The scene switched to me
lying on the warm sand, and the three naked 12-year-old boys were
slathering my cock with suntan oil, jacking it up and down. I was
floating on a cloud of sexual pleasure, waves of sensation coursing
through my body. And then... suddenly...

Blink... awake... my room... Joey... erection... exposed...

I was lying on my back, my stiff penis protruding through the front
slit of my boxers. Joey was jumping away from the bedside with a
frightened look on his face as I instinctively pulled the sheet over
me to hide my arousal.

"I'm sorry, Bill! I didn't mean to... It was just..."

He looked as though he was about to cry, as I quickly came fully
awake, trying to comprehend what had just happened. I sat up in
bed (after stuffing my cock back in my underpants) and smiled
warmly at Joey, and said "Hey! It's ok!". When he saw that I
wasn't angry with him, Joey opened up with a rapid flow of words.

"I came by to play and your mom said you were still asleep, but
that I should wake you up since it was 11 o'clock, and she said
she was going out shopping and for me to tell you she wouldn't
be back until 2:00 this afternoon. And when I saw you lying there
with no covers and your... you know... your boner was all hard
and stuff, and I... well, I kinda... you know, wanted to see it and
feel it. I hope you aren't too mad at me, 'cause I don't want you
to stop being my friend."

When he finally stopped for a breath, I told him to come over
and sit on my bed. "I'm not mad at all, Joey. In fact, I... well,
I kinda liked it!"

"It's ok that I touched your boner? You didn't mind?" he asked,
with such innocence in his voice that I had to struggle not to smile.

I knew where this was headed. My guilty conscience almost kept
me from proceeding, but then the words just  out of my mouth:
"Y'know, Joey, I'd like to have you do it some more... if you
want to." My heart was beating faster and I found it increasingly
difficult to get the words out. I swallowed the lump in my throat
and added "how about you? Anyone ever touched you like that?"
I could feel my face flushing with embarrassment at having
asked such a question, but Joey jumped right into the opening.

"YEAH! Me and some friends back in Pennsylvania did it a couple
times just before I moved. We called it 'having a feel-up' and it
was really fun. The first time we each took turns getting naked
and each guy would stand on a bed and let everyone else feel up
his boner, and then another time we all got naked at the same time a
nd played with each other."

"What sort of 'playing' did you guys do?" I asked, as my own
cock throbbed with excitement.

"You know, like having sword fights with our boners and rubbing
them together and wrestling around naked. It was really fun. But it's
kind of a pain when your boner won't go down for a long time. It
stops feeling good and gets kinda sore instead."

As I tried to decide what I would say next, Joey reached down and
adjusted the front of his pants, repositioning the prominent lump in
the front of his elastic-waist shorts.

"Umm... do you ever jack off?" I asked. His blankly quizzical
expression led me to add "you know, stroke your boner and make
the white sticky stuff come out?"

"No..." he replied, but then perked up and said "but a couple weeks
ago I woke up with this wet sticky fluid in my pajamas. And Mom
must have noticed it when she did the laundry because that evening
my father talked to me and said it was a... a 'knock-turtle emission',
or something like that."

"Yeah; 'nocturnal', actually.  Most guys call it a wet dream. Did your
dad tell you anything else about it?"

"Well, he said it was just my body getting more mature, and it was
natural, and it would happen maybe every few weeks, and I
shouldn't worry about it."

"Did he tell you that you can make your whole body feel incredibly
good anytime you want by stroking yourself 'til the fluid comes out?
That's what jackin' off is." When Joey shook his head 'no', I tried to
hide my growing excitement as I asked "do you want me to teach you?"

He grinned and bubbled with boyish excitement. "YEAH! That
would be really cool!"

For some reason, the knowledge that Joey had already had his first
cum seemed to take my guilty conscience out of the picture.
 I gave myself permission to make my sexual fantasies come true,
though I told myself I should take things slow. "Tell ya what, Joey.
Lets start out by having a 'feel-up' and then I'll show you all about
jacking off ."

I almost couldn't believe this wasn't still a dream as Joey quickly
pulled off his shirt and shoes and pants, pausing for a moment
wearing only his tight white briefs with a prominent ridge pressing
along the front. I had kicked off my covers and stood up, my own
erection tenting my boxers obscenely.

"Let's pull them down at the same time" I said; "One... two... three!"
and slid my shorts down my legs as Joey pulled down his underpants.
I was almost dumfounded at the beauty of his totally erect penis, an
impressive 5 inches and circumcised. It was as if Michelangelo had
sculpted the naked figure of his most beautiful apprentice, in full
arousal, for the secret enjoyment of a boy-lover patron.  Having seen
many erect cocks in the years since, both in pictures and in-the-flesh,
Joey's boy-cock remains the ultimate in beauty. It was like a slender
scale-model of the kind of perfect 8-inch cocks you see in gay
soft-porn magazines, like "Freshmen". His balls, about 3/4 the size
of mine, hung loosely in a slightly rounded sack (not low-hanging than
mine).

This whole time I stared at him, he was also getting an eyeful of me.
Even though I'd never cared for the way my face looked, I knew that
from the neck down I had a nice body - broad shoulders, good chest,
hard abs, and a handsome thick 6" erection with a patch of dark brown
pubic hair at its base.

After 20 seconds of silence, Joey said "you can feel me up, and then
I'll do you." He put his hands behind his head, lacing his fingers
together, displaying his perfect boy-model body for me. A bit
tentatively, I reached out and touched his satin-smooth ballsack
and then let my hand glide up the shaft of his incredible erection.
It was almost like an open electric circuit, flowing from his cock
to my hand. I ran my fingers over his smooth hot flesh, marveling
at its excited rigidity. My heart was beating so hard, I was sure he
could hear it.

"Now my turn" he happily demanded. I raised my arms as he had
and awaited his touch. AHHH! Yes! The sensations, barely
remembered from my adventures with David, flowed through me.
Another boy's hand caressing my stiff dick - squeezing, stroking,
exploring. He pulled the shaft toward him and let it go, slapping
against my belly. He giggled, then with a sincere look on his face,
said "You got a REALLY nice one, Bill!"

"So do you Joey. Are you kinda... you know, 'well developed'
for your age?"

"I dunno; maybe. I had the biggest one of all my friends back home,
but not by much. My best friend Tony's is almost as long, and I
think his is thicker. Not as thick as your, though. Some of the
other guys were still kinda small. Y'know those boys at the beach
yesterday, Timmy and Jim? When we were out in the water and
you were reading on the beach, we pulled our suits down and made
ourselves stiff, and they had really small boners, only as big as my
finger. I've never seen one as big as yours; it's really awesome!"

Mmmm... nice ego boost. "Show me how did the 'sword fight'
with your friends" I suggested.  Joey grinned and stood close to
me, holding his stiff penis at its base.

"You hold yours too," he chirped in a happy voice.  I bent my
knees a bit so our crotches were at the same level, and we let
our cockheads brush together sensuously, back and forth, as
Joey giggled and I grinned with enjoyment.

"That's feels great!" I said after a minute. "Wanna get on the
bed and wrestle a bit?" He nodded and we both hopped on my
full-size bed. Joey made the first move, jumping on top of me
and grabbing my wrists. His chest was raised up from mine to
put his weight on my wrists, but his stiff cock was in perfect
alignment with my mine, and he was humping against me in the
most incredibly sexy way, a big smile on his face. I could have
stayed like that there forever, watching his pretty face hovering
above mine and feeling the rising pleasure from our cocks rubbing
together, but I decided to get into the action. With theatrical grunts,
I brought my arms up until he had to let go, and I wrapped them
around his back, thrilled by the feel of his smooth skin.

I rolled us over, and now I was on top, my knees between his
slightly spread legs and my arms still hugging his body. We were
starting to breath harder from both the exertion and lust, and I
brought my body down on his, supported somewhat by my elbows,
and let my erection slide against his.

He wrapped his arms around my neck and hugged me close to him.
OH, God! He felt so good! Since his legs were spread and raised,
my hips were gliding against his velvet-smooth inner thighs as my
body instinctively began a fucking motion. He wrapped his legs
around my hips and brought his mouth up to my ear, whispering
conspiratorially "I really like the way it feels when we do this.
You have such a strong body." A rush of emotion ran through me,
a combination of love and lust. My lust was telling me to plunge
my cock into Joey's exposed asshole and my tongue between his
full red lips, but my brain said 'slow down; don't scare him'.
Afraid to kiss him, I instead pressed my face against his neck,
inhaling his intoxicating scent. My chest rubbed against his chest,
my cock against his, and I'm sure I would have cum if it had kept
going for any length of time. But then Joey made a quick move
that rolled us both onto our sides.

"Teach me how to do that thing... how to jack off... please?"

I grinned warmly (I'd been doing that a lot in the last 10 minutes)
and tried to make my intense sexual arousal subside. I reached
down and started toying with his barely-adolescent erection.
"You play with your boner sometimes? Like at night when you're lying in
bed?"

"Yeah; it feels neat when I do. But not as good as it feels right now!"

"Well, do it like this..." and I wrapped my thumb and two fingers
around his cock shaft and moved them up and down, brushing
lightly all the way from the base to his slightly flared cockhead.

"Oh, Bill! That REALLY feels good!" he said after a minute of
this pleasuring.

"OK, you try it" I told him, and his hand replaced mine.

"Like this?" he asked, closing his fist around his boyish rod.

"A little less pressure, I think, or you'll make it sore.... " I said,
and he began to stroke his erection, masturbating for the first
time in his life. As he kept going, his body began to tense and
his breathing became more ragged. His face scrunched up as his
hand moved faster. Then he stopped, panting, and looked over at me.

"It's startin' to feel really strange. Am I doin' it right?"

"Yeah, keep going. I think you're getting close. Tell ya what; I'll
finish you off. And I'll use some lotion; that'll make it feel even
better."

After getting the bottle of lotion from my bedside table, I positioned
myself on my knees between his spread and slightly bent legs. When
I started stroking his straining hard-on with my lubed hand, he moaned
with pleasure, closing his eyes, his toes curling with sensual delight.
With my other hand, I caressed his ballsack and thighs. I also gave
some strokes to my own cock, glorying in this incredibly joyous
experience.

"Oh, oh... it's feeling... it's like.... Oh, Bill! Yes! Oh, God!" He
clutched at the bed sheet with both hands, and his legs stretched
out straight. His eyes were closed and his head thrashed back and
forth. His balls were pulled up in a tight ball, and I squeezed them
gently. My right hand went into high-gear on his boner, concentrating
on his purple cockhead. "UH! OH! It's so... it's so incredible!
Something's gonna... OH! OH!! AHHHH!!!" And at that moment a
little spray of almost-clear cum shot from his penis, and I felt the
rhythmic spasms withing the shaft, signaling the peak of his orgasmic
pleasure. I almost came myself from the vicarious thrill.

I stopped stroking and flopped down beside him. His eyes were still
closed and his chest rose and fell with deep breaths. Lying on my side
with my head propped up, I gazed at him lovingly, then asked softly
"Well? Pretty nice, huh?"

He opened his eyes and his whole face radiated pure bliss. Turning
on his side to face me, he replied "Oh, Bill! That was SO awesome!!
What should we do now?"

"Well, how about you do me? You know, jack me off with that lotion."
I was still hard as steel and my cock had been begging for relief. I sat
up a bit, leaning against the headboard with two thick pillows behind
my back and head.

"OK!" he chirped and positioned himself as I had been - kneeling
between my spread legs. He squirted lotion onto both his hands and
set about slathering it onto my dick and balls. "You tell me what to
do, OK? I want this to be just the way you like it!"

"OK. Well, start out by stroking my boner slowly up and down and
playing with my balls.... Mmmm, yeah; like that.... Now a little harder
and faster... Yeah! That's real good!... Squeeze my balls a little...
Oh, yeah! Not too hard... Mmmm; perfect.... Now concentrate on the
head of my boner. Grab the top and slide your fist sideways, back and
forth, around the top, like a washing machine.... Oh, YEAH! God,
YES!... Keep going.... Now use both hands on my boner. Twist them
in opposite directions.... OH, MAN! That's GREAT! ... Now jack it
really hard and fast, up and down the whole shaft.... OH...OH, YEAH!...
Squeeze my balls... harder.... YES! Keep going!... AHH! Just like
that!... Yeah!... Do it!... Keep going!... Yeah!... UHHHHH!!!!"
Strings of thick cum burst up onto my chest and continued pulsing
onto my belly and Joey's churning hand.  "AHHH! Slow down!
Oh, yeah; that's so intense!... God, Joey; that was fantastic!"

He beamed with pride as I wiped the cum off with a towel lying on
the floor and tossed it to him to clean off his hands.

"Joey; you think maybe we could... you know... 'fool around' again
sometime?"

"Sure, Bill. That would be fun."

('That would be heaven'), I thought to myself.

I was floating on a cloud as we got dressed quickly and went
downstairs to get something to eat. When we went out to cut
some a neighborhood lawn, there was now a special bond between
us; something new. I had only to look at him and he gave me the
most wonderful smile, the memory of pleasure gleaming in his eyes.
Unfortunately, that afternoon he had to go out with his mom to
do some shopping for school, which began the next week. Then
they were going to meet his dad in the city and have dinner at a
restaurant. As I lay in bed that night, my hard cock in my hand,
all I could think about was Joey - his beauty, his innocent but
inquisitive sexuality, my aching desire for him - and I fantasized
about all the erotic things I wanted to do with him now. I knew it
was probably impossible, but I wanted Joey to be my boyfriend...
my lover and constant companion. That night, I acknowledged to
myself that I was gay. And that I was totally and irrevocably in
love with the boy who lived two houses down the block.

"Hey Bill! Wake up!"

I opened my eyes and there he was, sitting on my bed, his face
as bright as the late-morning sun.

"Your mom said it was ok if I woke you up. Hope you don't mind."
He glanced at my door and his voice lowered to an excited whisper.
"I did the jack off thing last night when I went to bed... and it felt
SUPER!  I got a boner really quick and I just stroked it and stroked
it until the stuff came out. This is SO COOL!"

"Yeah; I really like it too." I said with a warm smile. I slid my hand
along his bare thigh and inched my fingertips up into the pants leg
of his shorts. "So, do you wanna...." But just then, my mom called
from downstairs and told me to come down and eat some breakfast.
I decided not to cut any lawns that day and asked Joey if he wanted
to explore in the woods. "Sure!" he replied.

As we walked along, I tried to think of whether it was wise to take
Joey to the next step on the sexual ladder - cocksucking. I knew
I wanted to take his gorgeous penis into my mouth, and I yearned
as well for him to suck me.  When we got to a sun-drenched
clearing that was surrounded by thick trees (for years, my 'secret'
place to jack off), I pulled off my shirt.

"How 'bout we take off our clothes and work on our tans?" ... God,
that sounded lame! Why couldn't I just say 'let's strip nude and have
sex'?

Joey grinned knowingly. He was well aware of what was on my mind...
probably because it was on his mind too. When we were both down to
our undershorts, I said "can I take them off you?" my face flushed with
embarrassed excitement at what I had said, but Joey replied "Sure!",
as if it were the most natural suggestion in the world. I got behind him
and reached around his slender body, my hands sliding along the front
of his skimpy white briefs. Instantly, his penis came to life, pulsing
beneath my fingers, rising up against the confines of the material. I
massaged it through the soft cotton, listening as Joey breathed deeper.
I pressed my crotch against his ass and lower back, my cock rigid
inside my boxers, and my face was close enough to the back of his neck
that I could inhale that wonderful boy-smell. My fingers slid inside the
elastic waistband, and once again I was touching the object of my most
powerful fantasies. Joey gave a little moan of pleasure as I slipped his
underpants down his hips and slowly stroked his stiff 5 inches of erotic
flesh, cupping his balls with my other hand.

Then I felt his hands on my crotch as he reached behind himself. He
slid my erection out through the slit in my under short and squeezed
it sensuously. Then he turned around inside my arms, and we were
standing cock-to-cock, my arms around his body. I felt a powerful
urge to kiss him, but I held back.

"Wanna jack off?" he said eagerly. "I'm feeling really... uh, really...
you know...."

"Horny?"

He thought for a few seconds and then grinned. "Yeah! That's it! I've
heard older guys use that word, I didn't know what it meant. But now
I know.... And I'm REALLY horny!"

"Let's feel each other up first" I said, peeling down my shorts and
lying down naked in the soft meadow grass and patting the spot
beside me. As we lay on our sides, face to face, we toyed with each
other's cocks, feeling our pleasure build. I decided to make my move,
and said "want to feel something that's incredibly good?" Joey's
enthusiasm to delve more deeply into the discovery of sex was
transparent as he shook his head up and down. I pushed him onto
his back and crouched between his legs, continuing to caress his
penis and balls. My face was only inches away from his crotch,
and my heart pounded at the beauty of his cock and with the
thought of what I was about to do.

I licked my lips, elevated Joey's boner and held it by its base, and
dipped my open mouth down. The first touch of my lips sliding
onto the warm satin skin of Joey's erection is a sensation that
remains burned into my memory. I paused there for a few moments,
sucking gently on his boyish glans as my tongue gently circled the
tender flesh and toyed with the narrow piss-slit. The sound of Joey's
sighs and moans filled my ears and his fingers glided through my hair.
The taste and scent of my lover's sex filled my senses as my wet lips
slid down the slender pole. A bit of saltiness from his fresh sweat.
The slightest hint of adolescent musk mixing with the soapy cleanliness
of his morning shower.  Memories of how I had sucked my cousin
David (and how he had sucked me) flooded my thoughts - memories
that featured frequently in my masturbation fantasies. I was determined
to make Joey's first blow job as good as possible. Pushing past the
objections of my throat, I took all of Joey's shaft into my mouth,
pressing my lips against the smooth, hairless base of his erection.

"AHHH!... Oh, Bill!... That's so... ahhh!... so good!... I've never...
uhhh!... never felt anything like... AHH!!... Yeah!"

My head rose and fell above Joey's crotch, long sucking strokes of
my lips accompanied by the flicking and lapping stimulation of my
tongue. My free hand fondled his soft hairless ballsack and glided
along his baby-soft inner thighs. As I built up momentum, moving
my lips rapidly over Joey's straining cockhead, my fingers ventured
tentatively down to his virgin asshole, teasing the sensitive flesh
gently to plant the seed in his nervous system for the next progression of
our sex-play.

Joey was going crazy with pleasure. His grunts and moans echoed
in my ears, and his hips thrust up into my hungry mouth. His body
suddenly grew tense, his ballsack was drawn up tight, and I knew
he was about to cum. Using hand strokes to supplement the pleasuring
by my lips and tongue, I brought Joey to a crescendo of sexual ecstacy.
A spurt of thin salty fluid and the trembling spasms of his penis
announced his crashing orgasm, and I sucked urgently to extract
every precious drop of boy-cum.

As I lay back down beside Joey and draped my arm across his
chest, I could feel his beating heart and deep breaths. He was
speechless for long moments, finally sighing "Wow!" and smiling wearily.

"Glad you liked it" I said. We lay silently for a minute before I
finally added "could you... would you... you know, suck me too?"

He looked a little uncomfortable, and I almost thought he was about
to say 'no'. But he sat up and put his hand on my rigid cock, saying
"I'll try; but it's kinda... I dunno... a little gross, kinda.

Hmmm.... Here I had just given him a mind-blowing orgasm with
my mouth and he didn't want to reciprocate. I guess the look of selfish
disappointment on my face was transparent, but I said "that's ok; you
don't need to."

He perked up a bit and said "No; I'll do it." Moving slowly and
tentatively, Joey brought his lips to the head of my rock-hard erection.
Then his tongue emerged and began to explore my cockhead, licking
as if on an ice cream cone. A thrill ran through my body and I caressed
Joey's fine, straw-colored hair and told him how good it felt. He
looked up at me and smiled, as if to say 'I guess it's not so bad
after all', then wrapped his beautiful full lips around my flared glans
and attacked more aggressively with his tongue. Ah, yes! The feeling
of his hot mouth on my cockhead was heavenly. I knew Joey's small
mouth was straining to take in the top 2 inches or so of my thick
teenage cock and I dared not thrust my hips up. So I lay back and
let Joey's inexperienced mouth (and sometimes his teeth!) struggle
to please me. When he apologized that his jaw was getting sore,
and would I like for him to jack me off, I was almost relieved. His
stroking hands were more than proficient at bringing me sexual pleasure,
and he remembered exactly how I liked to have my balls squeezed.
As I approached orgasm, I feasted my eyes on my handsome naked
friend, beads of sweat testifying to his exertion, his face concentrating
on this job of bringing me sweet release. Feelings of love flooded my
heart, followed by spurts of cum flooding my chest and belly, to the
accompaniment of my vocalizations of pleasure.

I scooped up a glob of cum from my chest and licked it off my fingers.
"Try it," I suggested. Joey leaned down and licked experimentally at
a puddle of cum on my belly.

"Yuck! It's like snot!" he said, making a face, and then giggled after
he wiped his tongue off on his forearm.

In the days that followed, all my orgasms were shared with Joey.
Sometimes we would slip off for a quickie, like the time we got so
horny while doing yard work that we snuck behind a backyard shed
and pulled our dicks out, racing to see you could cum first.
Sometimes we would have the privacy (in the woods, in a bedroom)
to explore each other's bodies in a leisurely fashion. I never tired of
feeling Joey's erection, mesmerized by its perfection, inhaling its scent.

After the second time I sucked Joey off, though, I knew he didn't
have his heart in reciprocating (though, as before, he was willing
to do it). I told him it gave me a special thrill to suck him but I'd
like it just fine if he would jack me off in return. This satisfied him
totally, and he put everything he had into pleasuring me, even rubbing
a finger along the entrance to my asshole, as I had started doing to
him whenever I brought him to orgasm.

On Saturday, only two days before school started again, Joey and I
were finishing up a yard on a particularly hot and humid day, and we
were soaked with sweat.  "How about we take a shower?" I asked;
then added, with a wink, "we could even get in together, 'cause my
parents aren't home." He agreed and we proceeded back to my house.
The bathroom I used had just a shower, no tub, and it was definitely
big enough for two. I turned on the water and we stripped off our
clothes, then hopped in. The luke-warm water felt great tumbling over
my body, and it felt even better to rub against Joey's slippery skin.

"Let's soap each other up" I suggested, and turned the water off. I did
him first, rubbing the bar of soap all over his torso and legs. I got
behind him and soaped his back and thighs and ass, letting my sudsy
fingers slip into his ass crack. Then I wrapped my arms around his
slender body and soaped his crotch, stroking his now-rigid erection.
My own boner rubbed sensuously along his slippery ass, and I
instinctively crouched down a little and guided it between Joey's thighs.
With my arms wrapped around him, I thrust my hips and gloried in the
feeling of this almost-fucking, pushing my cockhead along the tender
flesh between his asshole and balls.

"You gotta try this Joey!" I said, and turned my back to him. As
my young friend soaped up his cock and my back, ass, and inner
thighs, I grabbed the soap dish on the wall and leaned over a bit.
Joey rubbed his slippery body against my ass, and I gasped with pleasure.

"Hold your legs together tight" suggested Joey, as his stiff cock
slid between my thighs. I could tell from his moans that he really
liked it, hugging me tightly from behind and humping rhythmically against
my ass.

('Now's as good a time as any') I thought to myself.

"Hey Joey; wanna try something that's even better?" He probably
would have be just as happy to shoot his load between my thighs,
but he stopped and asked me what I had in mind.

"Let's rinse off and I'll show you."

Back in my room, naked and horny, we finished drying off. My
parents wouldn't be back for a couple hours, so we had the house
to ourselves. "Joey; do you know about fucking?"

"You mean a man and a woman?"

"Yeah, but two guys can do it too. One guy puts his boner in the
other guy's ass."

"Yuck! That's sounds gross. Inside the bottom-hole?"

"It's not gross at all! It feels super good for both guys. I did it
with my cousin when I was 13, and it was totally cool. It's like
what we were doing in the shower, but much better. Tell ya what;
you go first. I guarantee you'll like it." As I talked, I ran my hand
up and down his inner thigh and began playing with his cock. His
adolescent lust quickly won out over his reluctance to put his cock
up someone's poop-hole. I got out some vaseline and applied it to
his cock and my rubbed it into my asshole. Then I positioned myself
as my cousin David had shown me - face down on the bed, with a
thick pillow under my hips, my legs spread and my ass elevated invitingly.

"Start out slow, 'cause it's kinda uncomfortable for the first little
bit."
He positioned himself between my legs and instinctively began humping
my ass crack. "Whoa! Slow down! Aim your cock into my hole." He
positioned the narrow head of his boner at the entrance of my love
tunnel and pressed forward. I flexed out and felt his slender lubed
pole glide into my body.

"OH, GOD! Yeah!... Uhhhh!... Fuck me!"

Again, the instinct of Joey's adolescent body told him how to
fuck me. In and out, in long slow strokes, pushing all the way
into me and then withdrawing until his glans was just inside my
grasping sphincter muscle. My brain was swimming with sensation -
memories of David, the thrill of being sexually dominated, the
tingling pleasure of anal nerve ending being seriously stimulated,
and.... most of all... feelings of absolute love for this beautiful boy
who was taking his first real step into sexual manhood. His moans
of pleasure mixed with mine. His arms wrapped around my chest
and he hugged my tightly as he lay across my back, churning his
strong hips into my upraised ass. Once, he slippered out after
withdrawing too far and was fumbling to get his boner back in my ass.

"Oh please, don't stop!" I begged. "Don't stop! Fuck me! It feels
so good! Take me, Joey!  Fuck my ass hard and fast." God!  I was
talking like such a sissy-boy queer! But I couldn't help myself. I
had craved this moment ever since my final night with David, two
years ago, and I was in sexual heaven.

His grunts grew louder and his thrusts reached a fever-pitch.
My own cock throbbed against the pillow, and I felt like I was ready
to cum myself when I sensed Joey going over the top, orgasming
furiously, shooting his meager spunk into my body, and hugging me
with ferocious intensity. As the wave of orgasm pulsed through his
body, Joey gave a few more thrusts against my ass, then pulled out
and lay exhausted by my side. I held him close, without speaking,
though the words that flooded my brain said 'I love you, Joey. I love
you!'

When Joey had revived after a couple minutes, I toyed with his
 softened cock, then slid my fingers beneath his balls, toying with the
tender puckered anal flesh, knowing that Joey liked the feeling. He
took my obvious hint and said "I guess you wanna fuck me too, huh?"

"Yeah; I'd really like to. Would that be OK?"

"I guess." He said with a smile, but I could sensed apprehension.

As he positioned himself as I had been, I gently worked a lubed finger
inside his tight virgin hole. He said he liked the feeling and I quickly
lubed my over-stimulated cock.

"It hurts a little at first, but I'll go slow. It helps if you bite down
on the bedspread.  Also if you push out with your ass muscle."

I could hardly contain my excitement as I positioned myself between
my lover's soft thighs. Looking down at the skinny rounded globes
of Joey's ass flooded my senses with lust, and I strained to hold
back my enthusiasm. He craned his neck, looking back at me - a look
of trust on his indescribably beautiful face. A Roman emperor (Hadrian
undoubtedly) would have given anything to trade places with me now.
Pushing my cockhead against his pink rosebud of tender flesh, I
reminded him to push out with the muscle, and I felt it open slightly
to accept my unstoppable thrust. 'Slowly, slowly' I urged myself as
I pushed in, inch by inch, until my entire 6 inches was lodged deep
within his 12-year-old body.

"You OK, Joey?" He nodded his head up and down silently.
That was all I needed to know. I pulled back and then excitedly
pushed forward. Jesus! So tight; so hot! My hands clamped onto
his hip bones, and I pulled him toward me with each powerful
thrust. I groaned with pleasure and heard him groaning too, the
sound muffled because his face was buried in the covers of the
bed. Oh, God! This was incredible! I was intoxicated with the
pure animal lust of fucking, driving my manhood into the most
beautiful, most desirable person I had ever met. My orgasm was
welling up, and I was lost in a whirlwind of pleasure and desire.
Joey was calling out in an urgent voice, but it was hardly registering.

"Don't! Stop! Please! Please!!"

My brain heard the words I had used just minutes before: "don't stop",
which told me Joey was feeling the same passion to be fucked that
I had felt. I thrust my thick cock as hard and fast as I could into
Joey's body as the most intense orgasm of my life burst through my
brain and ribbons of cum exploded out of my spasming cock into Joey hot
tight ass. The whole fuck probably took less than 2 minutes, but it
seemed an eternity of pleasure.

As I lay against Joey's back, exhausted and drunk with quenched
lust, I heard him whimpering. His face was buried in my bedspread,
but I could now tell he was crying. I pulled out of his ass and turned
him over. His face was red and tear-streaked, the look of pain written
all over his features.

"Oh, Joey! You're crying!"  (Duhhh!) I pulled him into my arms
and hugged him to me. I impulsively kissed his eyes, his cheek, and
then kissed his mouth as I held him close. "Joey! I didn't mean to...
I didn't know..." Now his crying came in pitiful sobs, breaking my
heart. He pulled his mouth away from my kisses. "Oh, Joey! I love
you! I would never do anything to hurt you!" He pushed against
my chest and got off the bed, grabbing up his clothes. Finally he spoke.

"You said... you said..." he struggled against his tears to speak.
"You promised it would only hurt a little! And then I'd like it!
But it was horrible! It hurt so bad! And I... I asked you to stop,
and I begged you 'PLEASE!'... but you went even harder!"
And again his sobs overcame his ability to speak, though he
continued getting dressed.

I was crushed. All I could do was repeat, "I'm sorry...
I didn't mean to.... I love you." Tears of regret flowed down my face.

"Stop it!" he yelled at last. "Stop saying you love me!
That's a queer thing, and I'm not a queer.... I don't want
to be with you any more. Goodbye!"

He walked awkwardly out my bedroom door, obviously
still in pain. I heard his footsteps fading and the front door
slamming. I just sat there, emotionally drained, saying to
myself: 'You dumb shit. You stupid, stupid asshole.'
Then I looked down at my dick, hanging soft between
my legs. 'It's all your fault!'

I wanted desperately to apologize, to explain how I got carried
away and didn't realize he was hurting. But I knew he was in
no mood for it that day. The next day, Sunday, I waved to him
as he got out of the car after church, looking like a preppie
stud in his khakis, blue blazer, and striped tie. He ignored me
and walked into the house. I went back to my room and lay on
my bed, feeling sorry for myself. Naturally, my perverted brain
and body soon led me to pull down my pants and stroke that
stupid demanding flesh standing up from my crotch. Visions
of Joey overwhelmed me; memories of our sexual fun; fantasies
of our future activities. But even as the cum burst from my cock,
I was crying bitter tears. I had screwed up the only friendship -
the only love - I had ever known.

School started the next day. Same old routine.  The dim prospect
of my life as an invisible, shy, awkward kid in the sophomore class.
A deep-in-the-closet gayboy.  If only I had Joey to come home to!

When I got home from school, there was Joey in his front yard...
with two handsome boys his age... throwing a football and having
fun. I slunk into my house. It was like that all week; Joey didn't
acknowledge my existence, but I often saw him with his new
friends... one time with a pretty blond-haired girl who flirted with
him outrageously as I spied on them through my bedroom window.

My masturbation sessions centered exclusively on Joey.... If only
I could suck his beautiful cock one more time.  If only I could
again experience the bliss of his perfect erection reaming my ass.

On Friday, after school, I saw he was alone and went over to see him.

"Hi Joey. Can we talk?"

"Yeah; I guess.  But I'm about to go to a sleep-over at Justin's house,
so make it quick."

I told him how sorry I was and how I had misunderstood what he
was saying and how I never meant to hurt him.

"Yeah; I know. Don't worry about it. It's in the past."

"Can we... can we still be friends? Can we still... you know, do
stuff... together?"

"No, Bill. I don't think so.  I've learned a lot since that happened,
and I realize that I was really naive."

I paused for a moment, reluctant to say this, but positive that I
would regret it if didn't try: "Joey; if you ever want me to...
you know, to suck you... or if you want to fuck me... I'll do it for you.
And I won't ask for anything in return.  I'll be there for you anytime
you want." I blushed as I said this, but this is what it came down to -
if I couldn't be his friend, I was shameless and desparate enough to
be his slut.

He stared at me with cold eyes.  "You're a faggot, right?"

"NO!" I objected.  He was silent.  "Well... maybe" I added slowly.
A sarcastic grin appeared on his lips.  "Yeah; I'm a faggot," I finally
admitted with a sigh of resignation.

"Justin and Mike told me all about faggots.  That they like giving
blow jobs even more that they like getting them; that they like getting
fucked in the ass. I told them about you and they said you're definitely
one." I felt my chest tighten.  I was speechless.  Joey continued: "maybe
we'll take you up on your offer sometime."

"We?"

"Yeah; Justin and Mike and me.  Justin says that faggots have a thing
about boys our age... you obviously do... and they love to 'service'
two or three boys at the same time.  Also he says its safer when
you're with an older faggot to have your buddies with you, so the
guy doesn't start getting weird on you."

My face burned hot and red, and my heart thundered in my chest. My heart
wanted only Joey, but that part of my brain that produced pure lust...
it was saying 'yeah, Bill; you know you want that!'

"OK, Joey.... I'll do it for you. I'll do whatever you ask me to do."

"Oh; by the way;  I've decided I want to be called 'Joe'.  I'd
appreciate it if you'd use that from now on."

And he started walking casually back toward his house. Then he turned
around and said "And don't be coming over here any more. I'll let
you know if I want you."

"OK... Joe," I said, my voice breaking, as my eyes became clouded
with moisture.

The End.

(Should there be a part 2?  Write to me: bil47@yahoo.com)