Date: Tue, 27 Dec 2011 19:22:33 -0500
From: dave stout <dodge1191@hotmail.com>
Subject: Voyage of Self Discovery

All rights reserved.  Other than downloading one copy for personal
enjoyment, no part of this story may be reproduced or transmitted by any
means, except for reviews, without the written permission of the author.
Comments on the story are appreciated and may be addressed to the author,
Dave at --- dodge1191@hotmail.com

This story contains descriptions of consensual sexual contact between
Males. As such it is homoerotic, designed for the entertainment of mature
adults.  If you are not of legal age to read such material or if the
subject matter would create any kind of personal moral dilemmas, please
exit now.

========================================================================

Although the title suggests it there is no boat involved in this voyage. It
is instead simply a tale of a young man's struggle to understand who and
what he is. It's never easy to come to terms with the desires and foibles
that define you as a person. Chris's awakening is a common yet strangely
uncommon tale. We are all composed of the sum total of our experiences;
journey with Chris as he explores just who and what he is.

Cast: Chris (Chrissie)-(Young man not yet comfortable in his own
skin)--Eric (Chris's mentor)

A special thanks to Bob for his editing skills.

A Journey of self --Discovery:

I had met Eric at a college watering hole called appropriately, "After
Hours." He's an in-shape guy of about 45 years old while I am barely old
enough to drink. We were both a little pie eyed by midnight and I knew I
couldn't drive to my dorm. Eric lived a block away from the bar and
graciously invited me to his pad for the night. I don't know how but we
somehow managed to stumble and fumble to his apartment. In any event I
don't remember how we got there or how I got to sleep.

Saturday morning started at about noon the next day as the sun streamed
through the windows. I took a pee and sat down on the couch rubbing my eyes
and gradually coming alive again.

Eric came into the room slowly drying himself with a towel. With my
hung-over addled head in my hands I found myself at eye level with the
biggest, thickest cock I had ever seen.  I just couldn't help staring at
his crotch.  His cock was about 6 inches long in its flaccid state with a
large Purple head; even soft and hanging loose it was impressive.

I was torn from my thoughts as Eric asked me, "Like what you see?" I didn't
realize that I had been staring for quite a few minutes.

He moved closer to me and said, "Are you interested in my fun-gun?"  I
found it hard to speak and just shook my head but continued to stare.

I hadn't really responded as I was in a state of shock over the way this
was progressing.  He stepped even closer and said "The way you were looking
at my cock may be just because it's the first big cock you've been up close
to.  I see cocks in the locker room all the time but I don't go into a
trance when I see a nice one, you actually did."

I sat frozen in the couch not knowing how I should respond when he grabbed
my arm and lifted my hand onto his cock, saying. "Just put your fingers
around it; you know you want to.  Don't worry Chris; it's just the two of
us here."

That big piece of meat was just hanging down so close I couldn't resist. I
put my fingers under it and kind of lifted it a little. "How does that
feel?" he asked in a kind of whisper.

My voice finally returned and I croaked out a faint, "It feels
alright. Much like my own but yours is much bigger."  I felt it starting to
throb and get stiffer in my grasp; I didn't know it then but it would be an
8 inch log when fully hard.

"Just jack it a little, were all alone here you know; it'll just be the two
of us, I won't tell anyone else" he said.

We actually were alone; maybe it was alright; I did what he wanted and was
surprised that I became very excited to be jacking another guy's cock.

Eric was talking very softly to me; "Myself I would never take another guys
cock in my hand' but it's OK with me, everyone is different with different
desires. You probably have more of that girlie DNA than most guys. That
only means you're probably happy to help other guys out when they're
horny. Hell, your name is even gender neutral and can be either male or
female, Chris or Chrissie, which will it be?" he laughingly said.

Eric continued talking as I slowly stroked him, "See that fluid on the end
of my cock, that's only a little precum just lean forward and lick it off.
Use the end of your tongue, nice and easy; it's what I want and I'm pretty
sure it's what you need."

I was very conflicted by a mixture of desire and humiliation. In any event
I leaned in slowly with only a little reluctance and touched his cock slit
with the tip my tongue. I thought to myself, there I finally did it.

Eric was saying, "Taste my juice. It won't make you sick; a lot of guys
like you really like it? I'm really a cunt hound myself but hey, a mouth is
a mouth."

The taste of Eric's cock-juice wasn't bad.  It was salty and close to the
texture of a thick, creamy clam chowder; the taste was a little tangy sour
but not unpleasant. I had tasted my own in the past.  I guess I didn't
realize the ramifications of tasting another guys pre-cum because at the
time I thought nothing of it. I soon found out there was a hell of a lot
much more to it!

While I was ruminating on what I had done Eric wrapped the towel around his
waist; his cock was now covered, gone.

Eric was backing away from me as he talked. "It's decision time now. You
know Chris it's really up to you; you'll have to decide what it is that
makes you happy and then just go for it. I'm kind of a cunt hound myself
but everyone's different. I'd be willing to bet that you're not very good
with the ladies and that's Ok; as I said everyone's wants that one, best
thing that rings his bell. In your case I'm guessing that servicing cock is
more your thing than pussy."

I was shocked, he thought I was gay, how could he have gotten that idea? I
liked girls, I just hadn't had as much opportunity has the other guys had;
no, I wasn't gay, that was for sure.

I knew Eric was wrong even as he kept talking in that very soft, gentle,
understanding voice. "I know some guys treat gays like crap, calling them
faggot or queers. I don't agree with that, in fact I'm all for anything and
anybody that makes my cock feel good. There really isn't any difference
between a male or female mouth except that a girly-guy understands just
what a man wants and tries very hard to make him happy. I must admit I
actually enjoy a guy's mouth hanging on the end of my prick more than any
broad giving me a grudging blow job."

He was smiling as he continued, "It's your decision Chris but I think you
need to think it through and then do what makes you happy. You should leave
now and work on what it is you want, what'll make you happy. I've got to
get ready for work now but when you finally decide let me know; perhaps I
can help you out. It's a big decision, make sure it's what you want to do;
remember I'm here for you, I can help you through this transition."

With that said he told me to lock up when I left and went to work. To say I
was conflicted would truly understate my confusion. I would think that
yeah, I wanted that cock of his only to have that thought trumped by my
fear of being thought of as a queer. I had heard the locker room talk of
fags and pussy-boys and certainly didn't want that for myself.

The "on the other hand" part of the conversation in my head was simply that
I couldn't get Eric and his equipment out of my thoughts. I was conflicted
but in the end succumbed to simple lust.

I called Eric on the phone and as was usual when I talked to him, stammered
out that I would like to see him again.

Eric responded, "Well Chris I think you know that if we get together again
it won't be just as two guys meeting to talk sports or girls. I'll want you
to own up to what you are and how you plan to please me. Do you understand,
do you agree?"

I took a second but then blurted out that I understood and agreed. His
snicker almost came through the phone but I felt finally free, I had faced
up to my desires and the hell with any of the consequences; it was done; I
had admitted to myself what I wanted.

As agreed I knocked on his door, right on time. Eric answered the door clad
only in his jockey shorts; I could hear the TV in the background; it was
playing yet another porn flick. Eric was the perfect host as he put
together a bourbon Manhattan in a nicely frosted glass; it was all very
elegant, very normal. As I sipped the drink and made small talk about
weather and sports I relaxed and almost forgot just why I had decided to
come to his house. By the second Manhattan we were laughing and commenting
on the lousy acting in the porn flick.

Eric called my attention to a scene he had fast-forwarded to; a man about
forty had a young guy on his knees in front of him and was slowly feeding
his mouth more and more dick. "Watch how eagerly he goes after the guy's
cock; his lips are actually trembling with anticipation. Look at how wide
his eyes get as he looks at that big advancing cock, he's dedicated. This
boy is an artist at cocksucking, don't you think."

The question jerked me out of my reverie and demanded an answer. I shook my
head yes and Eric told me to speak out. "Yeah, Eric he's an artist" I said.

He smiled coolly and asked me, "Chris, do you want to be my buddy, want to
please me?"

"Yes I do Eric. I want you to be happy; I'll do what you want." I finally
answered surprising even myself.

"Well that's good, as we've said it's just us here so nobody will ever know
and if it turns out that you don't like it, well, that'll be our
secret. I'm sure were not the only guys keeping a really big secret, this
happens all the time."

Eric stood up and moved closer fishing his cock out of his jockeys as he
put it to my lips, gently rubbing the head across them. I must confess it
felt very sexy; I know that's not the right word for what I felt then but
it was exciting and terrible all at once. I liked it but deep down I was
afraid of what was happening, of what I wanted, what I was becoming.

Eric said, "Just kiss it at first, till you get comfortable with my cock at
your mouth." I pursed my lips and kissed the head of his cock and stuck out
my tongue to lick it a little.  "That's right, open your mouth and swab
your tongue across the head. Just lick the piss slit for me. Then I'll
slide my cock into your mouth a little bit, see how you like it, and let
you get a little taste of it.  Make sure you're careful with your teeth; I
don't want you to scrape my dick."

He then just pushed the head of his cock into my mouth and held it there so
I could get used to it, as he said. "You've crossed a line here by letting
a guy stuff his cockhead into your mouth; you'll never be the same. From
now on you're a cocksucker, my cocksucker."

Eric continued in that soothing, soft voice. "Great, now here is what I
need you to do, just suck on the head and use your tongue on the piss slit,
it's very sensitive there. Use your hand and hold my balls softly as you
pet them, yes, just like that. Your tongue feels great but I want to feel
you lick my slit and try to get your tongue in there."

I could start to taste his salty, thick, cummy/pissy man-fluid as it hit my
tongue; his precum was warm and felt wonderful in my mouth. I actually
loved the taste and loved that I was exciting him this much. The feel of
his cock sliding through my lips and over my tongue was wonderful.

He stopped and took his cock out of my mouth; I hoped that I had not done
something wrong because I wanted, actually needed to continue. I looked up
at his face and noticed that he was smiling down at me with a wide
condescending smirk.

"You're doing great but I want to try another position, kneel in front of
me here, he said."

As I knelt down Eric stepped out of his jockey shorts, he was naked now and
it took my breath away. This man, Eric, had a nice body, very strong and
well kept for his age; my lust quickly overcame my common sense.

"Close your lips around my cock and let me move it in and out a little,
remember to cover your teeth, it's a little different when you're on your
knees; I think a cocksucker should always be kneeling, all docile and ready
to please." he said.

I did as he ordered and he began to fuck my mouth with slow and deliberate
strokes.  His cock seemed to grow ever larger in my mouth.  "Keep your
tongue against the bottom of my cock; that feels good. You know that its
tongue action that makes a mouth different than a cunt. Yeah, that's what
you are, a nice, deep cunt with a tongue."

Eric was breathing hard and reached out to put his hand on the back of my
head as he said, "The natural reaction for a guy sucking cock the first
time is to try and pull away when the cum stream starts. I require that any
pussy-boy of mine let me cum in his mouth. So this first time I'll just
hold your head so you can't pull off.  When you sense my cum starting to
spurt, catch it all in your mouth and don't swallow yet, gargle the cum in
your mouth. It's all part of the cocksucker ritual that I enjoy watching. I
require it of you, you'll do it."

His cock swelled ever more and I felt a spasm just before the cum started
shooting into my mouth.  It was all I could do to keep it all in my mouth.
He must have shot at least five big spurts of cum.  Eric was now trembling
and I could tell he was having a strong orgasm.  He seemed a little weak at
the knees and held onto my shoulders to support himself.  I was actually
proud that I had made him cum in my mouth.

Eric pulled his cock from my mouth and wiped the end of it on my lips. He
backed away a little and asked "Do you have an urge to spit it out?"  I
shook my head no. "That makes you great cocksucker material, no guy wants
his cocksucker to spit out his cum; I'm very happy with you."

"Open your mouth so I can see the cum." He said. I opened my cummy mouth so
he could see. "Move it around with your tongue so you get the full flavor
of it." I did so and it wasn't bad.  I kind of liked the taste and actually
was very excited with the idea that I had let a guy use my mouth like this.

Eric was patting my head as he said, "I want you to swallow now.  Let me
see you coat your throat with my ball-juice."  I swallowed with a gulp!

"That's very good.  You're going to make a good blow boy for me." I was
confused, how could I enjoy this, what had I become? He rubbed my head like
I was his new puppy, a prized pet. Maybe that's what I was; it was
confusing and exhilarating all at the same time.

Eric said "Don't rinse your mouth.  I want you to have the full taste of my
cum in your mouth as you drive home; you need to think about how much you
enjoyed servicing me, what it felt like to be on your knees sucking me
off. You've got my number, think it over and call me when you want to suck
me off again. It's up to you now."

I went home and jacked my cock off like never before; I was hotter than
hell. In the aftermath of the best climax I had ever experienced I thought
of where I now was in life. I had in fact been seduced to suck a man's cock
and swallow his cum load. There was no doubt in my mind that it was the
most humiliating and exciting thing I had ever done; yes, I had enjoyed it
yet I didn't want to be known as a faggot or cocksucker but I had to admit
that by definition that's what I was. I could at least take comfort in the
fact that Eric would keep our little secret. It was just between us; after
all, he had promised me it was just between us.

It was only a day before I called him. He answered after a few rings and
immediately put me in my place. "Who is this, how do I know you" he
asked. I told him it was Chris and I wanted to see him again. He again
asked "how do I know you?" I knew then that our next meeting would be
different; I told him that I was Chris and I wanted to be his cocksucker.

He chuckled and told me I could come over. As I drove across town I
admitted to myself that now that I had acknowledged that I was a cocksucker
I strangely felt relieved and quite a bit freer; very strange indeed.

Eric answered the door clad only in jockey shorts once again; god he looked
good.

"Hey there little Chris, I knew you'd be back for more. Once a guy like you
gets a taste of cum they always come back. Tell me, what is it you want
here? He asked."

"Oh, I just want to hang out a little" I said.

Eric put on that all-knowing smile of his as he replied, "I don't need
someone to hang out with; tell me why you're here, be explicit and honest
or you can leave right now."

This was my moment; I could get up now and just leave, go back to my old
life. Instead I blurted out, "I want your cock, I want to suck it again."

Again with that sly smile he said, "that's better, we've now established
that you're a cocksucker and in fact, my cocksucker. Are you in fact my
cocksucker Chris?"

I quickly answered, "Yes Eric, I'm your cocksucker, I want your cock.

Eric had that all-knowing smirk on his face as he said, "has of today your
Omega point of life will be cock; as we go forward thoughts of cock and
submission will always be on your mind because you're now a cocksucker"

I thought of what he had said as he continued, "It's good to get that
settled right up front; there's really no need for playacting. I need
someone to service my cock on a regular basis and I think you're eager
enough to be trainable. You need to understand though that there won't be
any half measures when you're here, no little-girl suck offs like you've
given so far. Now that you finally realize you're a cocksucker it's my job
to direct your efforts so that you're the best pussy-mouth you can be. You
want to pleasure me, don't you Chris" he said with a smile on his face?

I could only reply that yes, I wanted to pleasure him, wanted to service
his cock.

"That's good Chris, take your clothes off now while we talk. From now on I
want you naked whenever were together. When your alone you should be
training to swallow all my cock, right to the root. A banana is a great
substitute for a cock; you should just peal one and try to feed it into
your throat; it'll help if you're watching a training video while you try
to swallow it."

As I stripped down Eric explained, "Your first suck was just a sample of
what's in store for you as you become my blow-boy.  You'll have to be
available to suck my cock whenever and wherever I want you.  You're in the
service industry now and cock is going to be your specialty. That means
being a submissive, docile and eager cocksucker; your only thought has to
be my pleasure.  We'll start with blow jobs and work up to other duties, as
I see fit."

I nervously snickered at his little "service industry" joke while I
wondered what other duties there might be. I figured Eric would tell me in
due time.

He said, "I want you on your knees; a cocksucker should spend most of his
time kneeling before his guy. It's an act of submission that helps frame
his position in the universe and who owns him. I can always get a broad to
suck me off but there's usually a lot of drama. You have to romance a cunt
with dinner and lovey-dovey talk; after all that they still suck you off
like their doing you a favor. A fuck buddy guy like you just wants cock and
humiliation. There's no drama, just the pleasure of having a twink devoted
to servicing your crotch the way you want."

A twink, he thought I was a twink, how could that be?

He continued, "I often want to cum two or three times a day and in between
its pleasant to have a warm tongue licking my crotch; are you up for taking
care of all my sex needs?"

"I'll try to take care of your sex needs Eric but you'll have to show me
what you enjoy and how to do it; I'm very new at this." I answered as he
motioned me forward to his crotch.

I crawled between his legs and looked up at the thick outline of cock in
his briefs. It looked half hard already. Eric reached down and tilted my
head back placing his thumb on my teeth and pulled my jaw open. Without
thinking about it I stuck my tongue out and licked his thumb.

"Good boy, suck on it like it's the tastiest prick in the world" he said.
"A mouth-cunt should be totally compliant, always yielding his mouth and
body to whatever his man demands."

He then held his hand in front of my face. "Suck on my fingers," he
ordered. I took each of his fingers in my mouth, sucking and licking them
like a mongrel dog. Eric wore a college ring and it clicked against my
teeth as I wrapped my tongue around it, savoring its slightly metallic
taste. Then he suddenly pushed all of his fingers into my mouth, stretching
my jaws and touching the roof of my mouth, making me gag.  Rather than
easing his fingers out, he held his hand there.

"Easy," he coaxed. "Just relax that throat. Use your tongue to lick my
fingers; that'll help distract you."

I did as instructed and concentrated on licking each finger, finding that
it did indeed distract me and soon the urge to gag was reduced.

"Good boy, good cocksucker, we'll be getting to throat training soon
enough," he said as he finally removed his hand from my mouth. He then held
up a banana as he spoke, "I'm going to slide this into your mouth so you
can see just how much practice you need, open up wide now."

Eric slid that thick banana into my open mouth and just as he predicted I
gagged when it hit the back of my throat. "See, you're going to have to
practice; I'm sure you know that most skills require training and practice,
this is no different. A banana is perfect because you can select the size
as you work up to big, thick ones. It's so much nicer to train with
something that has the natural feel of a real cock. I require any suck boy
of mine to be able to take my cock all the way down; it's what I want and
you'll have to learn to do it" he said.

Eric dropped his jockeys, stepped out of them and sat down.  His half-hard
cock flopped against his belly reaching almost to his navel. This was the
first time I had a chance to really size it up and it looked simply huge.
It was certainly a lot longer than my puny five-incher, much wider around
too.

Eric then explained how he wanted me to proceed. "Start on my balls and
give them a good tongue bath.  Then work your way up my cock licking and
kissing it until you get to the top.  Then I'll want you to open wide and
swallow my cock, be sure not to scrape it with your teeth and use plenty of
tongue, I really like that."

I bent down and did as he said, from the sounds he was making I think I was
pleasing him.  I finally got his cock in my mouth and started down on
it. Remembering my first time, I used my tongue on the bottom and slowly
moved my mouth up and down taking a couple of more inches in my mouth each
time.  Eric grabbed the back of my head and started directing my
strokes. He began to push my head farther down forcing more of his cock
into my mouth. His cockhead reached the entrance to my throat and I started
to gag.

Eric pulled my head up a little saying, "If you're going to be my own
personal cocksucker you're going to have to learn to deep throat a cock,
remember I told you there would be no half measures, you've got to do it,
it's what I want. Just relax your throat and I'll help you swallow it, just
trust me."

With that said he grabbed my head firmly and pushed down forcing his thick
cock head into my throat. I started gagging again but he just held my head
until my gag reflex spasms lessened and his cock was as deep in my throat
as it would go with my nose buried in his pubic hair.  My air was cut off
momentarily and I thought I would pass out. Just then Eric relaxed his hold
and allowed me to back his cock out of my throat.

He then started to thrust his hips, driving his cock in and out of my mouth
like a piston. His cock was very hard now and the head swelled even
larger. I sensed Eric was about to cum and waited for my reward.  He held
me with the head of his cock just inside my mouth as he spurted out five or
six thick shots of cum.  I held as much of his cum in my mouth as I could
as he withdrew his cock.  I made a point of showing Eric that I was
swallowing his cum, just as he had taught me so recently. I was strangely
happy that he seemed pleased with my performance.

"That was a good job cocksucker; you've got a way to go but you're
learning.  Now has you go home savor the taste of my cum-load in your
mouth, get used to it; you'll be getting a very steady dose of it from now
on. The next time you call be ready to move on up to the next level, be
prepared to answer a few questions."

Of course the time quickly came when I just couldn't stand it and had to
call. Eric was very friendly and courteous this time. That was until he
asked in a calm, soft voice if I was ready to go to the next level. I asked
what he meant and he very quietly told me. "I'm only interested in a
cocksucker that can provide me with the full service that only a committed
cocksucker can provide; it's what I want and you'll do it. I often enjoy
having a pussyboy lick my ass or drink my piss. Is that you or have I
wasted my time with you?"

I couldn't believe it. It was bad enough that I was a cocksucker but now
licking ass and taking piss, no way I thought as I said, "I'm sorry Sir but
I just can't do that; I'll suck your cock and take your cum but piss is
just so dirty."

After just a second he said, "that's ok Chris, if you don't want to serve
me then at least lets part as friends, have a good life Chris." and he hung
up.

I was completely confused; how could he ask this of me, what the hell did I
do now?  I slept fitfully the next few days. I was angry that Eric could
even think I was an ass licker but had to admit to myself that when I did
close my eyes I saw that beautiful, purple cock head of his. I wanted
desperately to suck him off again. It was all I thought of; I had to do it
or spiral away into madness.

On Friday I couldn't stand it anymore and called him. He answered after a
few rings and sounded very cheerful, like nothing had happened. I was happy
and gradually relaxed as we discussed weather and sports for a couple of
minutes before he got to the point. "Are you ready to do what I want now,
if not we're done; I can't be wasting my time with you."

I answered, "Yes, I'll do what you asked, yes Sir."

Eric quickly replied, "Oh no, that's not enough, tell me just what it is I
asked and what you'll do to please me."

It's a good thing we were on the phone and he couldn't see my deep flush as
I said, "I'll lick your ass crack as you asked Sir."

There was a little chuckle in his voice when he said, "and what else will
you do boy?"

I recognized that I was already in way too deep but replied anyway, "I'll
drink your piss and lick your ass as you asked Sir."

"Meet me at my place Friday and be ready to pleasure me for the entire
weekend" he said as he hung up.

I could hardly breathe; I couldn't believe what I had just committed to but
had to admit that the thought of performing these perverted acts made me
very horny.

I was very disconnected all day Friday with thoughts of Eric easily
trumping any effort to accomplish useful work; I was beyond anxious as I
knocked on his door.

This time he answered the door dressed only in one of those huge, white
hotel robes. Eric sported a wide grin as he cordially fixed me a cocktail
and we once again conversed in small talk as we sat in the big leather
chairs. The liquor had me mellowing out, almost forgetting why I was
here. My relaxation ended after a half hour of small talk
conversation. Eric simply spread his legs and suddenly I was facing that
beautiful big, stem of manhood again; it was mesmerizing to me; I just
couldn't pull my gaze away.

Using that soft, quiet, assertive voice he said, "let's make sure we're on
the same page here; tell me why you're here Chris?"

I thought to myself, what a simple question, so full of ramifications and
commitment. I knew I had to own up to what I wanted, what I was, it was way
too late to back out now. "I want to please you. Yes, I'll suck your cock
and lick your ass, anything that you want me to do Sir."

Eric smirked as he said, "of course you're a cocksucker but I want a full
service pussyboy, what they used to call a body slave ready to drink my
piss or lick my asshole clean, to do whatever I want; is that you, is that
what you want?"

The shear shock value of what he so simply stated made me gulp out an
answer. "Yes, Eric, I want to suck you off and lick your ass. If you want
me to drink piss I will. I'll be your body slave, it's what I want. I'm a
cocksucker and want to pleasure you anyway you want."

"Well good, it's important that you understand that your place in the world
is between a man's legs, tending to cock. A lot of guys are only happy
submitting to a superior male but cannot fully accept the humiliating
acceptance that they are just a cockslut. Without that acceptance they can
only serve half-heartedly. Now that you've accepted that my pleasure is
your only concern you'll find yourself free because it's what you are, what
you were put on this earth to be."

As I mulled over what I had agreed to Eric told me to strip and lick his
balls. I fell to my knees and just breathed in the smell of his crotch. He
had that sweet, sour, musky aroma of sweat that I found so erotic. I licked
and sucked on his balls lovingly, knowing that his manly cum came from
there. I used my tongue like you would a wash cloth until he pushed me down
underneath his balls to his ass. I tongued up and down that thin little
line between his balls and his ass. I think it's called the perineum,
there's a little seam like line there that leads directly to his ass
crack. I licked up and down that crack working my face between his globes
until I hit that secret spot in his crack and he softly moaned as my wet
tongue swabbed over his asshole. It made me feel great knowing that I
satisfied him, a very strange feeling of contentment well mixed with the
humiliation of licking a man's asshole.

He stood up then and turned around bending over with spread legs. His ass
was now in my face. I didn't waste any time before spreading his cheeks and
looking at his wrinkled hole. I plunged my tongue in and began to lick his
ass. The flat of my tongue licked up and down his ass crack as my nose
savored his dank, male odor. I finally put my tongue into his hole and
started to flick it around in him. It was like I was kissing a girl's mouth
but this surprisingly tasted so much better to me. The male animal smell
was pleasant and I was happy that I was pleasing my man, my buddy, my
mentor, my owner. Just then Eric abruptly stood up and turned, facing me
and removing his ass from my face.

Eric had a very serious look this time as he spoke, "Do you know just WHY
you must lick my ass boy, and don't forget to say Sir."

"No, Sir" I eagerly replied.

Eric replied, "You must do it because it's what I want you to do. This is
the most important thing about a pussyboy; nothing you do is done because
you want to do it, when you do what you're told, you must always know it's
because I want it and you only want to please me, essentially I'll be doing
all the thinking for you. I want you to get between my legs again now and
lick my ass like it's what you want more than anything else in the world."

I nodded an assent but he frowned and I knew he wanted me to speak the
words, words that committed me, humiliated me, excited me.

"You understand, me boy" he asked with a sly smile on his face.

"Yes."

"Yes who?" he asked.

"Yes Sir."

That time, when I said "Yes, Sir", I felt something. I was on my knees
looking up at my man, a man I now thought of as my owner. I looked him
right in the eye as he said, "Do it now boy, lick my asshole."

I moved up to his ass and began swiping my tongue up and down between his
ass-globes; I was just licking his crack like a slave boy would,
concentrating on my man's shithole.

Finally his little puckered ass hole was as clean as it would be after a
shower. Eric turned, smiled and patted me on the head again tussling my
hair with one hand has he presented his cock to me with the other.

With one of those knowing smirks that that captured my attention he grabbed
his cock and pushed that big head down against my lips; I opened my mouth
and let it in. It felt so natural there that I just began to swipe my
tongue around the head and applied some suction to pull it deeper into my
mouth.  He grabbed hold of my head and twisted me onto the floor under him
as he leaned forward so his cock was lined up for a straight shot down my
throat as he told me.  "Time to open up suck boy, get ready for a face
fucking.  Relax your throat muscles cause this time I'm coming in deep."

With that said he began to do pushups over my face. It was all I could do
to control my gag reflex and not heave. Slowly I found it less distressing,
I was getting used to it; I was getting much better at it. He would push
down till the head of his cock was deep in my throat and then just hold it
there for a minute letting me get acclimated to this invader.

"I love the feel of your throat muscles on the head of my cock when you're
struggling to breathe, don't worry, I know your limits better than you do"
he said as he pulled back a little and then began a slow, steady face
fucking.  My nose was sore from the collision with his pubic bone.  He
didn't seem to care at all about my discomfort; he just wanted to get his
rocks off.

The fuck went on about ten minutes before he tensed up and began shooting
his load deep into my throat. "You better swallow suck boy, I don't want to
drown you with my cum." He warned me.

 Swallow I did.  It was Unfortunate that I didn't get to taste much of his
cum, as it slid straight down my throat.

He stayed in position over me as his cock started softening in my mouth.  I
was now pretty uncomfortable and really wanted him to get off me.  I
started pushing up on his thighs to get him to move but he said, "Just stay
there a minute and nurse on my dick head."

Of course I did as he asked and then he said, "I have a surprise for
you. Just tighten your lips on my cockhead and open your throat, get ready
to swallow."  I didn't think he could cum again so soon but I waited
anxiously for another taste of cum.  His cock twitched a little and a
squirt of fluid hit the back of my mouth.  It tasted salty, warm, pungent
and I realized that Eric was pissing in my mouth. I started pushing harder
to get out from under him.

"Hell, I just gave you a little squirt to see how you'd take it.  It wasn't
so bad was it." I couldn't speak but I shook my head violently and again
tried to push him off.  He pulled his dick from my mouth stood up and told
me to open my mouth and stick out my tongue.

To say I was conflicted would be understating my confusion. I had agreed to
this but didn't really want to do it. I knelt there thinking that what I
was doing was really perverted yet I was also excited as he squirted
another small stream of piss into my mouth. Eric sighed and began a steady
slow stream of piss into my open mouth.

He said, "You might just be the natural submissive I want if you let a guy
piss in your mouth." With that he let go a larger piss stream into my
mouth; I struggled to swallow but piss leaked out of the corners of my
mouth. Eric laughed as he said. "We'll have to practice that later, you
shouldn't spill, don't worry, you'll get better at it. I'll give you plenty
of practice. A cocksucker must be ready to swallow whatever comes out of a
cock. From now on whenever I want to piss you're to fall to your knees,
open your mouth, stick out your tongue and wait for me to lay my cock on
it. If I've got clothes on I'll let you open my fly, get my cock out and
aim it into your mouth as I piss. Whenever you're performing toilet duty I
want you to be making eye contact. A cocksucker's eyes give a man a window
into a submissives soul; a way to see how committed his cocksucker is. It's
very gratifying to watch your boy slide into complete and total submission
as he becomes aware of just who and what he is."


I kind of sleepwalked through the week essentially going through the
motions while "all things Eric" occupied my thoughts. My concentration
wasn't helped by Eric's telling me to refrain from cumming; it was really
frustrating but also very hot. I used the banana approach to throat
training that Eric had suggested; I found it helped and I was ready for the
real thing. By the time I rang his doorbell I was almost unable to
function.

Eric answered the door this time in just a jock strap that he filled out
completely. There wasn't much small talk this time as I stripped naked and
knelt down in front of him. He was pleased as he said, "that's great son, I
like a boy that falls to his place on the floor without being told. Why
don't you suck on it while I tell you what's on today's agenda for
you. Today is the day that you receive all of my cock; I plan to stuff it
right down your gullet. You'll be scared and uncomfortable but we both know
you have to learn how to do it because it's what I want."

I was happily suckling on Eric's big cock while he talked. I realized that
when I took his cock as deep as I could I still had three inches to go,
yikes. Eric noticed my efforts to throat his cock on my own and chuckled as
he said, "don't worry son, I'll help you through this, when I'm done you'll
be able to swallow a horsecock without choking. Get over to the bedroom and
I'll show you."

I was now so hot that I actually scampered into the bedroom where he had me
law on my back with my head hanging over the edge.

"Ah, it's so nice to see a suck boy so eager to have his throat plugged by
his man's cock. Open your mouth now as wide as you can; I'm going to spray
a mild numbing medicine in, don't worry it's mild and mostly used for sore
throats and sore gums. It'll help you acclimate to my cock as I fuck your
mouth."Eric said.

The spray did in fact numb me and I felt really vulnerable here; I was
finally going to do it.

Eric was rubbing his cockhead across my lips now as he said, "you need to
force yourself to relax now, I know it's your first time so I'll go nice
and slow until your mouth cunt gets used to it. Has a fuck your face you'll
need to get your breathing under control; take breaths when I'm stroking
out and using your nose for air. Under no circumstances are you to raise
your hands off the bed; you must remain perfectly docile while I'm fucking
you. A lot of tops tie their boy's hands but I think you'll do just fine
without that. Don't worry, I won't kill you, I know your limits better than
you do. Let's gets started now Chris, shall we."

It was upside down but I could see that cock coming at me; from this
vantage point it looked huge, I was scared as he poked it into my mouth. I
was able to suck slowly on the 3 or 4 inches he was stroking in and out of
my mouth; I thought, this isn't so bad. Eric began slowly advancing farther
into my mouth has I heard him say, "you'll be getting it all soon son, with
your head down like that there's a nice, clear path into your throat-cunt."

Every thrust now advanced that big cock another half inch and I was
starting to get the hang of the breathing. I gulped air when I could and
then, all of a sudden he plunged into my throat before immediately pulling
out until only his cockhead remained on my lips. He startled me saying,
"the look in your eyes when I pushed my cock home was just priceless, you
knew it was coming yet were startled. The first time is the hardest, let's
do this."

Eric again advanced his cock until he plunged into my throat again, pulled
out and went back in. I managed to start to relax a bit as he developed a
little in-out rhythm. I was surprised that I could get enough air; this
wasn't so bad. I became aware that each thrust was becoming longer, he
stayed in my throat longer each time now until it kinda felt natural to
have my throat plugged. He reached down to my throat and told me he could
feel his cock by rubbing my throat. Strangely I felt very proud, I could do
this, I could swallow that big cock. I became aware of his balls laying on
my eyes on the in thrusts.

Eric had quickened his fucking now and I knew he was close to cumming, his
cock had swelled even thicker and I knew from sucking him in the past that
that was my signal that he was finishing. Ever the considerate one he
pulled out of my mouth-cunt and sprayed cum all over my face; I opened my
mouth of course but my face was covered. It was so hot that when he put his
still dripping cockhead at my lips to suckle I came. I actually had a huge
climax and he began laughing as he told me, "that's great cocksucker, only
a natural can cum with a man's sticky cockhead in his mouth, I'm proud of
you boy."

I was a very contented cocksucker has I licked and sucked the sticky cum
mess from his crotch. He was proud of me, what more could I ask.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was on my knees again, mouth open, waiting for Eric to piss in my
mouth. He started a short stream as I gently suckled his cockhead. We had
settled into a little ritual where just as the piss-flow began I would look
at him with mu abject submission and humiliation evident in my eyes.

When he was done has he sat comfortably in his chair we talked as I licked
his balls. "You've become quite a competent cocksucker; I'll be showing you
off soon at my club but first you have to be fucked, take my cock right up
your ass like a good boy. Are you ready son" he asked?

"I'm sorry Sir but I thought this was all just between us" I stammered out.

Eric reached down and lifted my face up then slapping me like he would a
bitch. It wasn't especially hard but shocked me, Eric hadn't ever hit me. I
was after all a kinda voluntary cocksucker. After the smack he smiled and
said, "you'll do as I say and perform for my buddies when I say so; it's
what I want. My question was are you ready for your ass-fucking son?"

I was sucked his cock in preparation has he talked, "Now Son, I'm not
trying to be mean but I'm gonna have to take your ass pretty hard to bust
through that tight cherry." He spoke softly to me.

"It's gonna' hurt like hell for a few minutes but just clench your teeth
together and push back against me. I promise you the pain will soon go away
and you'll give and get the best fucking you've ever imagined, are you
ready Son?"

I was scared and anxious at what he said he was going to do to me, however
I had fantasized about being fucked by Eric and this was finally my chance
to complete my submission to him.

"Yes Sir." I breathlessly replied.

What could I say except that "yes Sir, I'm ready." The truth was that I was
terrified of receiving that big cock in my ass.

In spite of my inner conflict I took the tube of lube from him and smeared
my little hole.

"Put a couple fingers in and stretch it a little. It'll make it as easy as
possible." He said. As I worked some lube into my little hole he took the
bottle and I could hear him lubing his cock. "Showtime" he chuckled, as he
climbed on my back behind me.  He used his knees to spread my legs to give
him better access to my ass.  He put his left hand on my hip and used his
right to guide his cock between my ass cheeks.

He rubbed the head of his cock up and down in my ass crack zeroing in on my
hole.  "Being this is the first time for something this big up your ass,
I'm sure it's going to hurt. But I've also heard that once it's in, you'll
start to feel real good; has for me the only thing that'll ever go in my
ass is a tongue but guys like you learn to like it." he chuckled.

He found my wrinkled hole and started to push. I could feel the head of his
cock parting my hole, trying for entrance to my ass.  It started to burn
and I asked him to slow down while I got used to it.  "Push out like I told
you and I'll pop the head in.  After that it'll be easier." he said. He
used both hands to grip my hips and with a grunt forced the head of his
cock past my outer ring.


Nothing had ever hurt me that much and I tried to buck him off. He knew the
reaction I'd have, locked his arms around me and held me tight. He was much
bigger and well built and there was no way this side of hell I was going to
get away from this searing cock pain in my ass.

Eric wasn't moving; he just let his cock soak in there with the head lodged
just inside my ass opening. In my agony I heard him say, "there, there,
son, you'll be OK, just let it rest. Your ass-cunt is the final frontier to
you becoming my cocksucker. It won't be long before you beg for a cock to
fill your ass."

I didn't think so: I just started crying it hurt so much. I finally stopped
squirming and he was whispering more there, there's into my Ear in that
very soft understanding voice. It was then that I remembered his
instructions and pushed my ass back and up further onto his huge
cock. Damned if it didn't help a little has it went in a little deeper.

"That's a good boy," he cooed. "You listened to your man. Your man's cock
is all you need to think about now. Soon most of the pain will go away and
you'll feel fullness; a very contented full feelings that boys like you
seek."

With that he took a couple of small strokes, just a couple of inches
deep. I couldn't help letting out a little gasp as I began to open up. Then
almost as quickly as the pain had come, it lessened and I began to feel
full and warm with the most comfortable feeling of belonging I'd ever
experienced. I felt like I'd passed some initiation or rite of passage into
submission.

"Does it hurt that much now, Son?" he asked. "The first time always hurts
the most. You'll get used to it, soon you'll even be looking forward to
it. It serves a purpose. It gets a boy's attention and serves notice that
he is owned and his man expects a good fuck."

"No, Sir, it feels a little better now; it's just so tight and full. I just
cried because I'm stupid. Your cock is filling me up and feels damn good
inside me; I know I was born to be fucked like a girl and it's what you
want" I replied.

"It's customary to thank the man that has just popped your cherry and
plugged your asshole for the first time."

"Thank you Sir for giving me my first fuck. I know this is just as you
described it, the attitude adjustment I so righteously needed" I said.

It just seemed so right, so natural to thank him and show respect. Having
said it and meant it, I accepted my position as his boy, now his bumboy.

"You're welcome son. Now let's do a couple of simple exercises. Let me feel
you clench down real hard with your ass muscles. There, that's good. Once
again. Yeah, uh-huh, that's good. I can feel that. Yeah! Uh-huh,
yeah. Again. Oh, yeah!  Now, let me feel you use your ass to suck on
it. Take a couple of small strokes with your butt; stroke my cock with your
ass. Oh, yeah, that's good. Couple more. Uh, huh. Not bad, boy. That's
right. Yes, just a little more on the...Yes! That's it, you've got it. Now
raise that little butt and push back on my dick. I think you can take it
all. I want you to chow down with that tight little ass and eat the last
three inches of cock all by yourself."

I raised my butt and pushed back, made my ass suck it for a while, then
took more, it still hurt but it was kind of a good hurt now. He gently
urged me back, talking to me like a swim coach. I found myself feeling that
the most important thing in the world was to please this big cocked man
stuffing my ass. Soon I felt his crotch hit my ass cheeks. I kept on moving
until I was pressing into his belly to get as much in me as he would let me
have.

With his arms still tight around my waist he pulled me to a standing
position to get the last little bit inside me. I welcomed it now.  We stood
with him deep within me for several minutes running his big hands the
length of my body playing with my cock and balls, pulling, twisting them to
just the point of pain.

"I've only found a couple of blow boys in my life that could take all of me
boy; I know it's not easy the first time. You're owned now, you belong to
me. I know this ownership talk kinda frightens you," he said as he took a
couple more long slow strokes into my ass, "that's understandable, but I'll
make you a bet that after were done today you'll fall asleep every night
thinking about getting a cock stuffed into your ass. Now, that's enough
chatter, let's get you fucked Chrissie" he said.

I'd never been fucked like that since; you never forget your first. I did
my best to work with him and met each thrust so it might give him the most
pleasure for his cock. He fucked me slow, deep, long and hard. Damn, he was
right, popping my cherry was making me give him the best fuck I'd ever
experienced. I was now so open he was slamming his entire length of cock
into me with no problem. I was pushing my ass back as hard as I could
trying to get more of him inside me.

He fucked me steady for a good thirty minutes. Every now and then he would
comment on how much he loved to fuck my tight little suckboy butt. He
rested for a while still inside me and then continued to fuck me like a
wild man. Soon after that he seemed to tire.

Eric said suddenly, "Okay Son, it's your turn now, let's see what you've
got!" he pulled out quickly and my ass made a small popping sound has it
shut.

"Sounds like that cherry grew back, Son!" He laughed, "You know what you
Have to do. I want you to finish up by fucking yourself on my cock, you'll
figure it out."

"Yes Sir." I quickly replied.

I positioned my ass onto that big mushroom head of cock and with only a
little hesitation sunk it all the way in to the base. More pain, but this
time I knew it would soon pass and would help me give him the good ride he
deserved.

"Was that Okay, Sir?"

"I'm proud of you boy" he replied.

Those were magic words for me, it was all I needed to flip the on switch to
my cock riding, ass fucking machine. I don't know where my ass learned to
ride a dick like that but I became a cock riding demon. I was a pretty
athletic little guy and got a good rhythm going on his big cock. I could
watch his face and tell when I was doing a stroke that really pleased
him. I hunkered down and began to pound my ass down hard and fast on his
big shaft. I was giving his prick a good ride and sensed his cock beginning
to feel thicker, larger in my ass. I knew he was getting near an end, a
climax. I was now taking longer, faster strokes and I rode him into the air
as his back arched to give me all of it he could. I knew he was close and I
didn't waste an inch of his cock as he shot a big man load up into my hole.

Eric just collapsed in heavy breathing and had a big smile on his face.  He
was spent. I'd managed to drain his big balls into my ass in that one
violent last moment. I clamped down hard with my ass and begin to milk him
to get the last few drops.

"Now son" He said, "You don't get off my cock until you cum So you'd better
take my horse for another ride."

I knew he wasn't kidding, and the idea of me being staying, forcibly
retained, impaled on my man's cock was almost enough to make me come
without touching myself, however, just out of habit, I reached down to take
my cock in my hand.

"Take your hand away boy. You're going to get another benefit from having
your cherry popped.  Now, you open up that ass for my cock. I'm going to
Ram my cum deeper into your ass. Get on your knees now and arch your back
with your ass cunt stuck out for me, Understand?"

I sobbed out a yes and fell to the floor just has he had ordered. I no
longer was ashamed to show my emotions to Eric; we had crossed over that
line long ago; I had come to terms with being a cocksucker. I'm usually not
an emotional guy but all this was happening way too fast for me to
process. The things he taught me made a lot of sense to me. It was like he
opened the book of my life and was reading my most secret page. I felt like
I was looking through a glass door dimly and then someone opened it for me
to see; I knew he understood me. Like a good Master should, I thought. He
petted and stroked me has I was sobbing softly, stroked me like you would
comfort a girl.

He was behind me again and slowly stuffed his prick into my asshole once
again. I couldn't help letting out a little yelp when it poked through.

I apologized and he smiled knowingly. All the while he had began taking
some long slow strokes into my butt hole. He knew it was soothing and
comforting as I slowly began to push back to make the feeling the best for
both of us. Damn, he sure knew what he was doing. I'd never imagined being
fucked so patiently, so sweetly even. I sighed out loud at the sensation of
acceptance that I was now his fucktoy. The loud sigh caught Eric's
attention.

"Don't feel ashamed. Your man understands that you just had an epiphany
which can shake you to your core. Sometimes we can see further through our
tears than we can a telescope." He paused for a moment and then added,
"You're going to make many men a fine cocksucker Son.

He fucked me very slowly then, driving his prick has deep as possible has
he long dicked my ass. Every once in a while he teased me by pulling his
cock all the way out. My hole would spasm shut a bit just in time for his
cock next plunge. Finally he came once again deep in my ass.

Eric just relaxed onto my back. Eventually his cock plopped out of my
dripping hole. He got into his big leather chair and told me what came
next. "Get a warm, wet washcloth and come back here."

I quickly went to the bathroom, ran hot water over the washcloth and
returned to my very familiar kneeling position between his legs; I could
see flecks of blood, cum and ass-juice on his half-hard cock as he told me,
"a lot of tops like their boy to lick the cock that just fucked them but
that doesn't do it for me. I like my suckboy to wash and wipe me clean like
any good servant would. Of course the boy knows that when he's done he has
to suck that cock and no matter how well he washes it there will be just a
little shit smell and taste left that can only be cleansed with his mouth
and tongue. That's the way I like it, now clean my cock up, the cock that
just fucked your asshole."

I very gently washed his cock but by now it wasn't fully hard and I knew
that there would be "stuff" left in the little folds that only my mouth
could clean. It was dirty, disgusting and made me very horny. I had just
cum when getting fucked and has I washed him I realized that I was hard
again. Eric sighed approval of my attention to his cock. I finally finished
and he smirked down at me for a minute.

"Use your mouth now Son, you know what you have to do. You must never
insult a man; you'll always have to use your mouth to clean him after he's
finished using you. This is good training for you. Any man that uses you or
one I refer you to will want to know you've been trained in submission and
have learned your sex manners, this is an essential one."

"Now, get to it boy!" There was something about the way Eric ordered me to
do things that made me do them without question; his voice was both
assertive and soft. I obeyed like someone mesmerized to do a distasteful
task while thinking he was doing another more appealing one. The funny
thing was, the reality blended into one and everything became acceptable
with no thoughts of reluctance. I knew I was going to do it. He seemed to
know, too. His control over me was strong and powerful and, God help me, I
wanted more, more of his control, more of him.

He simply said, "Do it Son." I lowered my head to that sticky cock and knew
what I had to do. All at once he stood up abruptly and ordered me to kneel
in front of him. I obeyed of course and didn't hesitate at all.

I'm proud to say I licked and sucked him for all I was worth; I cleaned him
good. Surprisingly the musky, sticky left over goo on his prick actually
wasn't too bad. When I finished he was as clean as just out of the
shower. I knew he was pleased and proud of me as well. His strong,
commanding voice gently had urged me to follow his orders as you might
teach a child to walk, one step at a time. All the way down the rabbit hole
of submission; he really did own me.

"You're a natural, Boy." he said "Clean it good. That's it, go ahead clean
your Master's dick son" he had told me. Now finished, I took his cock into
my mouth lovingly as he told me he was happy with my cock-cleaning job. I
sat back on my heels and thanked him for allowing me to clean his sticky
cock.

"You need something to wash the taste out of your mouth." he told me. "Open
your mouth and hold the head of my cock like you've been taught." he
ordered. "Now, grab my ass cheeks with your hands. Okay, I'm gonna' wash
your mouth out with a little piss now."

"I'm gonna' let it flow a little faster; it's time you learned to take it
full force. If you have a problem gently squeeze my ass with your hand and
I'll slow the flow, understand?"

I squeezed his ass that I understood and he started the flow again. I drank
and drank, gulped a few times until I could feel my belly was expanding
with his good, hot, tangy piss. Then I sucked for more. He didn't keep me
waiting. He started his flow, full out, I gulped, gulped, and gulped.

"I can't believe this you like piss." he laughed and rubbed my head, then
started the flow again. Damn, it was hot. What had I been missing? Gulping
Eric's piss after my first ass-fuck completed my day.

On the way out I had to tell him how I felt, "Eric I want to thank you for
taking my cherry tonight. I thought it was going to kill me but you were
right; I ended up enjoying it.  I'll want to do it again but only after my
hole has a chance to heal up."

He tousled my hair and lightly slapped my face as he said "good cocksucker,
that's my boy."

=======================================================================
Excerpts from: "Voyage of Self-Discovery Aftermath", the final chapter.

In these few, short weeks I had come to terms with the who and what I
was. Eric had taught me my destiny was to serve as a suckboy; when a cock
was presented to me I was to think only of how best to pleasure it. My
favorite college class was now "cock service 101." I now knew just how
different the "up close and personal" service has a cocksucker was from the
anonymous sex at places like "gloryholes". Looking an alpha male in the eye
has you served was very humiliating, hot and exciting; it had forced me
into coming to terms with my need for submission. This was just the way it
was and I accepted my new role; it is what it is.

This was the weekend that Eric picked to show me off to his friends.
Instead of meeting him at his home I had the address of his club. He had
instructed me to just show up and all would be explained. The club façade
was nondescript without so much as even an outside sign. It seemed to be a
reclaimed warehouse without windows and a well maintained brick facing.

I wondered if I had the right place as I opened the door. Inside of the
small anteroom an older man asked me why I was here; I gave him my name and
said that I was here to meet Eric Smith. He smiled and waved me into the
adjoining locker room saying, "you're on the guest list, strip down and put
your stuff in locker 33. Your uniform is in there, it's all you'll need.
When you're done I'll let you into the club."

It seemed strange but a lot of what Eric had gotten me into was strange so
I stripped. The "uniform" was simply a piece of rope and two pieces of pink
cloth. A photo on the locker room wall showed a young guy with the pink
cloth pieces arranged as a loincloth using the rope as a belt; it was
obvious that this was to be my "uniform." I was nervous yet I excited
enough to have a hardon has I arranged the loincloth as modestly as
possible. There isn't any sense of modesty or nuance possible when you
enter a room in a pink loincloth, everyone knows what you are and why
you're there. I was now a cocksucker so I might as well flaunt it; I walked
with a sure and deliberate purpose, proud of being a cocksucker here to
serve my man. The doorman didn't even look up has he hit an electronic
buzzer unlocking the door.

The inside was decorated like an old English men's club with oak panels on
the walls and thick, heavy red curtains framing faux windows. There was a
traditional walnut bar on one side and the rest of the room was filled with
heavy leather furniture. Someone had taken great pains decorating it for
even in the very dim light it looked warm and inviting.

I stood in the doorway has my eyes slowly acclimated to the soft, dim
lighting. I could now see that there were quite a few people in this club.
The bar stools were full and many of the floor chairs had men sitting in
them. I heard Eric's voice calling "Chrissie" from the bar and headed to
him. This was what he wanted and that was all I needed to know.  To be
continued:


I appreciate feedback and thank the many people who have contacted me with
ideas and comments. A special thanks to Bob who did such a great job as
editor. Comment to dave at dodge1191@hotmail.com