Date: Sat, 25 May 2002 13:43:43 -0400
From: Stan Unknown <stan992001@hotmail.com>
Subject: Chapter 20 Of Beating The Odds

			      Chapter Twenty

"Kevin, you have all of us to support you now. We're all your friends. And
none of this will ever go out of this room," Dave said.

"Thanks," Kevin answered. Then everyone turned to Josh.

"Oh, so it's my turn to pour out my life story in front of all of you? I
don't know. I think I've changed my mind. I think my last spanking was like
five or six. My story would pale in comparison to everyone else's. Plus,
Jimmy hasn't told his," Josh said.

"Me? Mine's simple," Jimmy answered.

"Then tell it," Josh said.

"If I do, will you?"  he asked.

"Maybe," Josh said, with a smirk on his face.

"If I tell my story, you have to, also," Jimmy said, as he walked up to
Josh with his fist balled up and placed it under his chin.

"Now I'm really scared," Josh answered, as he grinned at Jimmy.

"You should be," Jimmy giggled, as he kissed Josh lightly on the lips. "But
you have to promise!"

"Ok, Ok, I said I'd do it. God, this is like some kind of confessional or
something.  And I'm not even Catholic."

"Just remember you promised. Ok, me," Jimmy said, as he paced around and
got his thoughts together.

"Ok, let's see. My family life isn't like any of yours. I don't think I've
ever gotten spanked. My brother either. My `rents are way too enlightened
for that.  They just rant and rave when I've done something they don't like
and take away privileges. I think they know I'm gay, but are in denial."

"What do you mean?" Dave asked.

"Well, I've never had a real boyfriend before," Jimmy answered. "Before
Josh, that is," he said, and giggled. Josh just grinned at him in response.

"But my Dad is really strict. He is an Executive Vice President at Merrill
Lynch. He expects to run our family like he does his company. He thinks
nothing of coming into our rooms and searching for anything he wants."

"God, that sucks," Ryan said.

"You've got that right. He does it to my brother, too, but he hasn't found
anything yet. But I had a net boyfriend named Jamie. He lives in Australia.
I met him through some gay support group this old guy was running because
of some of the stories he had written. Long story. Anyway, my Dad found an
e-mail I had sent to Jamie and flipped."

"One e e-mail?" Bruce asked.

"Yeah. It wasn't like he found some of our ICQ chats. He might have killed
me if he had found those," Jimmy said, as he looked sheepishly at Josh.

"I don't care, Jimmy. That was long before we met," Josh answered.

"I know. I'm sorry. Anyway, he read everything I had sent or had been sent
to me. And he was really angry."

"That's an invasion of your privacy. I know it's his house, but he should
have never done that," Dave said.

"That's what I told him, but you don't know my Dad. He thinks he's General
McArthur or something at home. We are expected to do everything but salute
him when he arrives. Even Mom."

"I'd have thought she would have gotten really tired of that a long time
ago and divorced him," Jim said.

"He's eight years older than her. She was young, had just graduated from
college, and even though she was really good looking, she wasn't having
much luck finding a job she really wanted to do. She met him at a party and
he swept her off her feet.  He was rapidly rising through the Merrill Lynch
ranks and need a trophy on his arm to impress all his bosses at parties. At
least that's the way Mom tells the story. So anyway, it wasn't long until
he proposed. He was rich, pretty good looking even though he was lots
older, and she accepted. She got pregnant with me after a couple of months
and she became a housewife.  Steve came along two years later and he got a
vasectomy.  No more kids," Jimmy said.

"They decided they didn't want a big family?" Neal asked.

"No, he said that most of the executives at Merrill Lynch had always spoken
out against big families and most had two kids. So he did the same."

"That kind of sucks. Looks like how many kids you have shouldn't have
anything to do with your job," Brian said.

"You don't understand how becoming an executive works. There's an old
saying my Dad told me after I was about 14. `It's not who you know, it's
who you blow!' He totally hates homosexuals, but he was using that to
illustrate a point to me about how to run my life after college. He thought
it would make some big impact on me or something," Jimmy answered.

"I don't get it," Rob said.

"What he meant was that you had to suck up to everyone above you to get
promoted. If anyone is a gay basher, it's my Dad. But it's really amazing
how many gay references he uses to make his points. But he listened to
anything his bosses said and basically became a yes man. You should see him
at company outings where the families are `invited'. Invited means if you
know what's good for you, you'll bring you wife and kids and they'd better
behave. Including the wife."

"You said your story was simple. This is simple?" Josh asked, joking.

"Sorry. I'm an actor, Ok? Once I start talking, I don't know when to shut
up. Should I stop now?"

"No, go on," Bruce said.

"Ok. He would give us all a long talk every time about how we were on the
job now. This outing wasn't for fun. We were there to help him with his
career. This was OUR JOB! So we would all get dressed up and he would
parade us in front of all the executives. We were supposed to be the
perfect family. The he would dismiss us and he would go into his vaudeville
act."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Dave asked.

"Have you ever seen when blacks were just being introduced into movies and
TV? The term was a `Tom'. They would always shuffle around saying `Yassa'
this and `Yassa' that. My Dad was the same way. He would laugh at anything,
no matter if it was funny or not and make a complete fool of himself in
front of his bosses. My Mom used to pull me aside just to watch his
performance. He was totally different than the man we knew."

"That doesn't sound like she loved him very much if she ridiculed him in
front of his kids," Jim said.

"We aren't your average family. We get anything we want. My Dad makes an
obscene amount of money. He has prestige, power, and tons of money. And he
doesn't mind sharing it with us.  I think that's what Mom settled for. She
stays with him because she doesn't have to work, she can go to the country
club and get a facial or play tennis, maybe take an aerobic class. Maybe do
some charity work to make sure she keeps her standing in the community, and
basically shops for a living."

"Why doesn't she divorce him then, if they don't love each other?"  Jim
asked.

"You ever hear of a pre-nuptial agreement? He made her sign one. If she
ever divorces him, she gets her jewelry and her clothes. She gets what
money is in her checking account, which is a lot, but he keeps everything
else. I don't know if Steve and I are in that or not. Hehehe I doubt
it. She signed it when they got married."

"So, she's just staying married to him for what she has?" Jim asked,
clearly confused. He knew his parents really loved each other, and would be
together, no matter what.

"Sure. He uses her. She uses him. That's just the way things work."

"And what do you do?" Josh asked?

"I take after my Mom. I have my own credit cards and I play the game too. I
see how much money I can spend before `Dear Dad' goes ballistic. I know he
doesn't love me. He just uses me. So I use him back," Jimmy said.

"Bullshit!" Josh yelled.

"What?" Jimmy asked, startled.

"I just don't believe the whole fucking story!" Josh yelled, as he got up
and paced around the room.

"What don't you believe?"  Jimmy asked, scared now.

"You're the perfect family, right? You're the rich kids. You have
everything. You have the perfect family life I've always dreamed
about. Your family can't be as fucked up as mine! It just can't be!" Josh
yelled.

"You want to come over some time?" Jimmy deadpanned.

Josh whirled around and stared at him. Jimmy stared back. Josh finally
broke eye contact and walked around in a circle.

"Ok, are you ready for my story?" he asked.

"Yeah," Jimmy responded.

"And you're going to love me no matter what I say?" Josh turned around and
glared at Jimmy.

"Nothing you can say will make me change my mind," Jimmy answered.

"What about all of you?" Josh asked, as he spun around and pointed at
everyone else, including Dave.

"We aren't going to love you like Jimmy does. But you don't want that
anyway. We might all love you as a friend and brother," Dave answered. "But
no one here is going to judge you, if that's what you're asking. After all
of this, I think we're all brothers now. What do you think, guys?" Dave
asked.

Dave looked around the room and everyone shook their heads yes. Then he
looked back at Josh.

"So all of you are going to love me, no matter what I say, no matter how I
acted earlier?  No matter what I've done?" Josh asked.

Everyone just stared at him and shook their heads yes, even Brian and
Kevin, who were ready to beat him to a pulp a few minutes before.

"You too?" Josh asked Jimmy.

"I love you," Jimmy said, as he came up and kissed him hard on the mouth.
"You just try to get rid of me. If you do, I'll pour sugar down your gas
pipe.  That'll destroy your engine and I know you love it as much as you do
me, anyway."

"You can't. Locking gas cap door," Josh answered.

"One of the few things I learned from my Dad will solve that. Really long
flat head screwdrivers can be used to break into any locks like that,"
Jimmy

giggled.

"He taught you to break into cars?" Josh asked.

"Not exactly.  But he has a huge set of tools in the basement. Nothing but
the best. And he tried to show me a few things before he learned I hate any
kind of tools like that. But I can use a screwdriver and I'll bet a liter
of sugar water will kill your engine within 20 miles," Jimmy laughed.

"He taught you that, too?" Josh grinned back.

"No, I think I read that somewhere.  You want to take the chance?" Jimmy
kidded.

"You touch my Trans Am and I'll kill you!"  Josh yelled, faking anger. "You
do love me, no matter what?" he asked, swinging back around suddenly.

"Yeah. Not matter what," Jimmy answered, staring him in the eye with a
straight face.

"Ok. Where do I start?"


                                   ******************

"First, all of you have to understand my family. My Step-Dad owns a
business in Savannah. My mom met him here in Atlanta. I don't even remember
how they met. It was a long time ago, nine years now, I think. I don't
remember the last time I saw my real Dad," Josh said.

"We aren't rich, but not poor either. Just kind of middle class. My
Step-Dad wanted us to move to Savannah but Mom is a Head Nurse at Northside
Hospital in Atlanta and she refused to move. So my Step-Dad would come here
on weekends. But now, he seems to only come here maybe two weekends a
month.

"I don't know why they ever got married.  When he's here, all they ever do
is fight. He really didn't like kids, so my brother and I always stayed
away from the house when he was there. Mom wouldn't even ask us where we'd
been.  She was too busy yelling at him.

"My Mom worked really hard to get to be a Head Nurse. She had to take the
worst shift to get the promotion. So she left to go to work at about 9 or
9:30 to make sure she was ready to do her regular 11 to 7 am shift. I would
leave after we had dinner together and she never seemed to mind.

"I was really into music when I was 12. One new CD of a band I loved then
was coming out on a certain date. I had told Mom all about it weeks before
it was to be released and she had promised to take me that day to buy it. I
had saved up my allowance for a long time to make sure I had enough money.
It was really important to me. And I was getting a whopping two dollars a
week then, same as my brother, who was ten. So, saving up that much had
taken me a long time to do.

"The day finally arrived, and Mom had something she had to do before we got
home from school. She wasn't home to cook supper, and I was pacing back and
forth, waiting on her. She finally got home and had to spend her time
getting dinner ready. She finally told me after dinner that she was sorry,
but the trip to buy my CD would have to wait.

"I was 12. I thought I was 18. I got really mad at her and stormed out of
the house. I was going to walk to Wal Mart and buy it myself. I was used to
being out at night. No big deal. And she really didn't try and stop me.

"I was walking along a road where there weren't any houses that fronted the
road. Just thick woods. It was still daylight. There were still lots of
cars passing by."

                                    *****************

"Hey kid. You need a ride?"

I walked over to the door of the car and said through the window, "No
thanks. I'm just walking to Wal Mart. Thanks anyway."

"That's where I'm going. I need some new batteries. Get in and I'll give
you a ride."

Now I was big for my age at 12. I could fight really well. I didn't fear
anybody. So I said, "Thanks, mister," and got in.

He was really friendly. We talked all the way to Wal Mart. He seemed to
really want to know what I thought about everything. I really liked him
when we finally parked.

My Mom loves me, but she was always so busy. I have no idea where my real
Dad is. My Step-Dad could care less about me or my brother. So I guess I
was eating up all the attention he was showing me.

He went with me while I found the new CD. I walked with him while he found
the batteries he had come for.

I had already eaten supper but Mom had fixed something I really didn't
like.  I was already mad at her for not taking me to get my new CD like she
had promised and I had only eaten a little bit of what she had fixed and
then had stormed out of the house.

We both paid for what we had bought and were walking out of the store. This
was a really big Wal Mart. It had a grocery section and a McDonalds in
front.

"Hey Josh. I'm really kind of hungry. I think I'm going to get something to
eat. Want to get something and eat with me?" he asked.

"No thanks, Rick. I ate dinner before I came. You go ahead and I'll just
walk home."

"Come on, Josh, you're a growing boy. I know you could still eat a
hamburger. I'll buy if you'll stay and eat with me. I'm really enjoying
talking to you."

That did it. An adult was enjoying talking to me? And he was going to buy?
It was only a minute later and we were sitting in a booth in the back. He
had bought me a Big Mac, large fries, and a chocolate shake, all my
favorites, and we were talking like we were old friends.

"You know Josh, You remind me of a boy in a movie I just bought. You look
just like him. You've never acted before, have you?" Rick asked.

"No," I answered, curious.

"You're a really good looking boy. I just wondered. And you really do look
like the boy in the movie. I just had to make sure it wasn't you," he said.

I just laughed and said, "Well, it sure wasn't me."

"Ok. Have you ever seen it?  It's called `Lord of the Flies'."

"No, I've never heard of it," I answered.

"What time to do you have to be home? I live just a short distance away. Do
you want to go home with me long enough for me to show you the boy I was
talking about? I could fast forward the movie and show you your double and
then take you home anytime you say. I've heard that everyone has a double
somewhere that looks just like you. And I swear this kid is yours."

I was really curious. I really liked Rick. He seemed really nice and I was
enjoying taking to him. "Sure, I would like that. My Mom will leave for
work soon, but she doesn't care if I stay out at night. My Dad lives in
Savannah and my brother will go to bed soon. I could probably stay and
watch the whole movie," I answered.

Rick just grinned at me, as we got up and put our trash in the receptacle.
And my life totally changed as we walked out the door.

                                     To Be Continued

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