Date: Mon, 31 May 2010 09:40:45 EDT
From: Bwstories8@aol.com
Subject: Castaway Hotel: grand Reopening - Book 7, chapters 1 - 2

The Castaway Hotel: Grand Reopening --Book 7 - by BW
Copyright 2009 by billwstories
Chapter 1 -- Picking Up the Pieces.

**Author's Note:** Please read the disclaimer in Chapter 00 before you read
this.

We'd just arrived home after Cody's funeral and I was surprised at the
number of people waiting for us.  The Shays had informed me earlier that
some of our friends wanted to come to the house for a while, but I never
suspected they meant this many.  I assumed he was talking about the
Spences, Beckers, Sally, his wife and him, and possibly a couple of others,
but I never imagined I'd find the sort of gathering that greeted us when we
got there.  Our home was overflowing with many other friends, co-workers
and extended family, but it was nice to see so much support, concern and
love as was being generated at this time.

At first, I suspected everyone had come by to see how we were handling our
grief or to offer their sympathy, but it soon appeared they had more in
mind.  Many had brought food, so we could have a meal after the service,
but there turned out to be more than enough to feed everyone who showed up.
Our friends took care of all of the preparation and other details, which
included cleaning up afterward.  It was extremely kind and thoughtful of
everyone and their efforts were greatly appreciated.  It also seemed to
soften our grief for a time, as we focused on appreciating those around us.

Even though Cody's passing wasn't quite as devastating for me as Brent's
death had been, it was still hard to deal with.  Brent's passing had been
the result of an accident and not something I had been able to prepare for,
even though Graham had continually warned me that he suspected something
might happen to him.  However, being able to anticipate Cody's demise did
not make it any easier to deal with.

Despite the fact I'd been praying for a miracle, I knew Cody's chances of
beating the Leukemia were slim.  He was fighting against gigantic odds and
I think I had begun to resign myself to his fate, even before the end came.
Still, it doesn't mean losing him affected me any less than when I lost
Brent or that my grief wasn't as deep.  The only difference was the shock
factor.

When it happened, I wasn't ready to hear about Brent's tragic death,
whereas Cody's passing was almost a relief, in that I knew he was no longer
suffering.  I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I'm somewhat
comforted to know he is no longer in pain and is in a much better place.
This doesn't mean I loved him less, don't miss him as much or I'm not as
sad, because I am.  It was just a different set of circumstances.

In both cases, there's a grieving process to go through and it's not
something you can bypass or ignore.  The process wasn't easy when I lost
Brent and I know this time will be just as difficult, but it's something I
must go through.  When Brent died, I leaned on those near and dear to get
me through the roughest times and I will do the same now.

My biggest regret is that it takes a tragedy like this to reunite you with
people whom you care deeply about and have known for a long time.  When
things like this happen, those people suddenly appear out of nowhere to
offer their assistance and, suddenly, you wonder where they've been in the
interim.  However, it's still nice when they extend their love and support,
because that's when you truly realize how many wonderful friends you
actually have.

I made it a point to move around the house for one reason, so I could speak
personally to everyone in attendance.  I thanked each of them for his
concern and support and wanted to let everyone know how much I appreciated
his friendship and emotional support.  I also wanted to thank them for
bringing the various dishes they had prepared to feed my family and those
who stopped by.  Although it may not seem like anyone did a great deal, it
was far more than anyone could ever suspect.  Due to the size of my family
alone, not to mention the number of friends who had gathered together with
us, each person must have spent a considerable sum and a great deal of time
to provide the quantity of food it took to feed this small army.

I had spoken to about half the people in attendance when I came upon the
Beckers.  I was anxious to chat with them, seeing I hadn't seen them since
the previous Christmas.  I guess that was partially due to the fact we had
all been so involved with Cody's medical condition and other parental
issues, but I felt I needed to apologize for my oversight.  I slowly walked
toward them and spoke.

"Albert.  Arlene," I began.  "I'm so sorry I've been so lax about keeping
in touch."

"Josh, no need to apologize.  We understand," Mr. Becker responded, " so
don't think twice about it.  It's partially our fault too, as we've been
quite busy ourselves."

"Oh, Josh," his wife added.  "We're so sorry about what happened.  He was
such a cute young man and we didn't really get a chance to know him very
well."

Mr. Becker looked at his wife as she spoke and he seemed to be making some
odd facial expressions as she continued.  I wrote it off as a figment of my
imagination, due to the recent stressful events I had been through.

"Thank you for coming and showing your support," I told them.  "It's times
like these when our dearest friends and family are most important to us.
I'm sorry you didn't get the opportunity to know Cody better, because he
was a truly remarkable young man."

"From what I've heard, for him to have gone through all he did and still
remain so optimistic about his chances, he must have been a truly unique
individual," Mr.  Becker added.

"I know none of us will ever forget him," I continued, "but it will take
some time to adjust to his loss.  It's hard to explain how someone who has
only been a part of your life for such a short time could have such a huge
impact."

"Just be grateful you had him for as long as you did," Mr. Becker offered,
sincerely.

"Were you related to the boy who died?" Mrs. Becker asked, taking me aback.
I couldn't understand her comment and looked toward Albert for an
explanation.

"Arlene, this is Josh Currie and the boy was one of Josh's sons.  You know
that," he told his wife very softly, but there was no spark of recognition
in her eyes and there didn't seem to be any connection to our previous
conversation.  Looking confused, she just stared back at her husband.

"Josh, I'm sorry," Mr. Becker added, apologetically.  "We've been battling
our own problems for the past several months.  Arlene has been diagnosed
with an Alzheimer-like disease and isn't always lucid.  I don't think it is
Alzheimer's, because she doesn't ever get violent.  Sometimes she's aware
of what's going on around her, but at other times she has no idea where she
is or who others are."

"Albert, I'm so sorry to hear this and can only imagine what you've had to
endure," I consoled.  "Is there anything we can do to help?"

"Josh, you have enough to handle with your own family and we'll be fine,"
Albert responded.  "It was hard for me when Richard was in school, because
I had to cover both my wife's and my chores, while at the same time trying
to keep an eye on her.  However, now that Richard is on his summer
vacation, he can help me do her chores and take over some of the
responsibility of helping me care for her, so it's not so bad.  I'm just
not sure what I'll do when he goes back to school in the fall."

While he was speaking, I immediately noticed Albert had called his son
Richard and suspected Little Ricky might be outgrowing his nickname.  I
wanted to inquire about this, but due to everything else going on, I felt I
would have to pursue it at some later date.  However, I still had to
respond to him about the current situation first.

"Albert, don't let your pride get in the way," I offered.  "My boys and I
would love to help you and your family in any way we can.  Besides, it
might be good for us too, to keep our minds occupied so we don't dwell so
much on having lost Cody."

"I'm sorry, Josh.  I didn't mean to offend you," Albert apologized, "and we
would be happy to accept any help you would like to give.  Just don't go
out of your way and end up neglecting your family in the process."

"Don't worry about that, Albert," I replied.  "We're all survivors and we
would be happy to do what we can to ease your burden too."

"Albert, who are all these people and what are we doing here?" his wife
suddenly asked.

"We're at the Currie's home, Arlene," he told her.  "You remember Josh and
his boys, don't you?"  She stared blankly at him and I could sense his
pain.  I could also see how much it hurt him that his devoted partner no
longer traveled on the same plane of reality as the rest of us.

"Josh, would you excuse us, please?" Mr. Becker asked.  "I think I need to
take my wife home now."

"Certainly, Albert, and I'll be in touch soon," I told him.  "The boys and
I will set up a schedule establishing who will come out to the farm to help
out and when.  We'll keep rotating the boys, so you'll have plenty of help.
I know this is a busy time for you and we'll be there as much as possible.
I realize you're concerned the boys might not be as willing to do this, so
to ease your doubts, I promise I'll only utilize those who volunteer for
this duty."

"Josh, you and your family are so very special," Mr. Becker countered.
"Even at a time when you're dealing with your own problems, you still think
of others first."

"Not entirely, Albert.  I'm doing this for us too," I admitted.  "I think
it will help us get through the next few weeks by not allowing anyone to
spend so much time focusing on our loss."

Albert nodded and then we parted company.  He took his wife and Little
Ricky home, but did take time to say good-bye to everyone first.  I planned
on discussing their situation with the boys later, once the rest of our
guests had departed.

Over the next hour or two, all our other guests began to leave as well,
although Steve, Mary, Sally and the Spences stayed until the very end.
They were continually picking up, putting things away and washing the dirty
dishes.  After everything had been taken care of and it began to grow very
late, they also took their leave, but not before letting us know all we had
to do is contact them, if there was anything else we might need.

Once they had gone, I made my rounds to see how the boys were doing.
First, I looked for Graham.  Of course, I suspected he'd be with Kevin, so
I went to Kevin and Vinnie's room first, to see if he was there.  The door
to their room was open, and as I looked inside, I wasn't surprised to see
the three of them together.

When Graham noticed me standing in the doorway, he stood up and came racing
toward me.  He threw his arms around my waist and hugged me, before he
looked up and spoke.  "It was beautiful.  Everything was just wonderful,"
he gushed.

"I'm glad you thought so," I told him, while hugging him back.

"Cody must have loved it," he added, when he lifted his head and looked at
my face.  "That's probably why he was smiling when I saw him, as we left
the cemetery."

"I hope he realized everything we did and heard what you and Trey wrote," I
added.

"And what you said too," Graham corrected, "and I hope he saw Andrew's new
picture of him.  It was really awesome.  I can't believe he was able to do
it so quickly."

"Yes, he is truly a very talented young man," I agreed.  "Are you doing all
right?"

"Yes, I'm okay," he confirmed.  "Kevin and Vinnie are going to let me stay
with them again tonight.  I hope that's okay."

"It's fine with me," I confirmed, "as long as the three of you have
agreed."  I saw Kevin and Vinnie nodding their heads in the background.

"I want to thank both of you," I told them, "for helping out like this.
I'm sure Graham appreciates it as much as I do and I just wanted to let you
know that."

"We know, Dad," Kevin replied, with a wide grin.

"It's all cool, Pop," Vinnie added.  "You've always been there for us, so
we're just trying to do what we can too."

"Well, that means a great deal to me and I can't thank you enough," I told
them.  "I just want you to know that.  Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Nope, we're fine," Graham confirmed, "but I guess I should thank you for
everything you did for Cody and me.  Cody told me he felt lucky that he got
to come here and I know he loved you as much as we all do.  Thanks for
doing everything you did for him and for letting me be there for him until
the end."

"Hey, I was just doing my job as a dad," I replied, before things got too
maudlin, and then I left the room, so I could check on the others.

Most of the boys were doing fine when I looked in on them, although they
were all pretty sad.  I can't imagine it was easy for any of them to lose
another brother, even if they weren't around him for very long or had the
opportunity to know him very well.

As I went into another room, I noticed Ricky and Peter were also together.
This came as no surprise, but what I saw did cause me to wonder what was
going on.  Ricky had his arms around Peter, who was sobbing into Ricky's
chest.

"Is something wrong?" I asked, since I was confused by what I was seeing.

"I think today just got to Peter," Ricky told me.  "We were in here talking
and I think he was worried about how I was doing, but then he suddenly
started crying.  I haven't found out why yet, but I'm sure it has something
to do with Cody."

I went over and sat down, on the other side of Peter, to see if I could
help.  When I did, Peter turned toward me, looked up through his tear
filled eyes and spoke.

"I'm sorry, Sir," he began.  "I know I promised to help Ricky, but suddenly
I saw one of my mates in that coffin, instead of your son.  I don't know
why I thought that, but it made me very sad."

"Hey, no problem," I reassured him, as I put my arm around his shoulder.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No, Sir," he replied.  "I guess I was just a bit bonkers."

"No, not at all," I responded.  "Death is not something that is easily
dealt with and can affect us in many ways.  Do you have any idea why you
thought of your friend in this manner?"

"Well, he does slightly resemble your son," he answered.

"Who?" Ricky asked, since I guess he hadn't gotten this far with Peter.

"Brian," Peter almost whispered and I could see the wheels turning in
Ricky's head.

"You know, you're right," Ricky confirmed.  "Even though he's a little
older, slightly taller and his hair is a little darker, they do look
somewhat alike.  You know, if I just looked at the black and white picture
of Cody, I could almost see Brian instead."  Peter nodded and then lowered
his head again.

"Well, now that's settled, is there anything I can do for either of you?" I
followed.

"No, Sir.  I'll be fine," Peter replied.

"Hey, what's with this sir crap again?" I teased, while giving him a wink
when he looked up at me.

"Sorry, Pop," he apologized.  "I guess I forgot while I was feeling sad."

"Well, let's cheer up and get that Peter smile back in place," I told him,
which immediately got the response I wanted.

"How about you?" I asked Ricky.  "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay," he told me.  "It was a little rough at the funeral home, church
and cemetery, but I think I'm okay now.  I'll let you know if I need
anything though."

"I hope you do," I told him, before I left.

After checking on the rest of the boys, I went back downstairs and ran into
my grandsons.  They weren't as cheery as they generally were, so I thought
I should speak with them as well.

"Anyone want to go outside with me," I asked.  They both looked up, but
neither answered.

"Aw, come on," I continued.  "I don't want to be all alone.  So no one
wants to be with me?"

"I'll go, Papa, if you want," Jordan answered, but I could tell his heart
wasn't into it.

"Me too," Nicky added, but I could also tell he was just trying to humor
me.

"Come on then, let's go out on the porch," I suggested, figuring I could
talk to them privately there.  Once we were sitting on the porch swing, I
confronted them.

"Is something wrong?" I asked.  They looked at each other, before either
spoke.

"Papa, are any of our other uncles going to die?" Nicky finally asked.

"As I told you earlier," I stated, while looking him directly in the eye,
"I suspect the rest of us will all be very old before that happens."

"Yeah, but Uncle Cody should have been old when he died too," Jordan
challenge, "and Uncle Brent too."

"I know and I'm not sure why they didn't live to be very old too," I
explained, as I tried to remain calm and collected, "but sometimes
accidents and diseases do happen."

"So it could happen to one of our other uncles or us?" Nicky pressed,
putting me on the spot again.

"I guess anything is possible," I agreed, "but what happened to your Uncle
Brent and Uncle Cody were unusual.  Uncle Brent just happened to be in an
automobile accident and was the only one seriously hurt.  Uncle Cody just
got sick, but the doctors didn't know enough about his illness to be able
to help him.  Even though things like this happened to them, it probably
won't happen to anyone else."

"Promise," Jordan challenged.

"Jordan, I can't promise," I acknowledged, "but it is highly unlikely."

"So something could happen?" Jordan continued.

"Yes, like I said, it is possible, just not probable," I explained.  "It's
not something you should be worrying about though, because I doubt anything
like this will happen again, at least until you're old and gray."

"Like you, Papa," Nicky observed, which innocently reminding me of my own
mortality.

"Even older and grayer than me," I told him with a wink, so he didn't start
to worry he'd insulted or offended me.

"Okay, if you say so, Papa," he agreed, and then both livened up a bit, as
we swung back and forth.

The boys stayed with me for another thirty minutes or so and we chatted
about many other things.  I asked them if they were going to join us on our
vacation this year and they immediately said they wanted to, before asking
me where we were going this year.  I explained a little to them and they
seemed satisfied with what they heard, so I figured I had two more to add
to my plans.  I would check with their parents first, just to make sure I
had their approval.

Once we went inside, I entered the family room to relax and spend some time
alone.  I realized I also needed to clear my mind and take a little more
time to think about how we could help the Beckers.  My time alone didn't
last long, however, because my older son Michael came in to speak with me.



The Castaway Hotel: Grand Reopening --Book 7 - by BW
Copyright 2009 by billwstories
Chapter 2 -- Trying Times.

"Dad, I know this isn't the best time," Michael began, "but I really need
to speak with you alone about something.  Do you mind?"

"No, we can go to my room and talk there," I suggested.  "People will be
less likely to venture in, if the door is closed."

We got up and headed for my bedroom and Michael shut the door behind us,
once we entered.  I wasn't sure what this was about, but it seemed to be
important to him.

"Dad," Michael began, "This is probably not the right time and I'm not sure
how to say this, but is something going on between you and Jake?"  I was
stunned by his question and didn't answer right away.  After a few moments
of reflection, I finally responded.

"Why would you ask that," I countered, "and what difference would it make
if there was?"  He just stared at me at this point.

"Well, the question came up while Andrea and I were using your room this
time.  When we first arrived, we went to hang some things in your closet
and couldn't help but notice that your things and Jake's were in there
together.  We knew some of those clothes were Jake's, because we've seen
him wearing those same items during some of our other visits.  So, what's
the story here?"

"The story is, I'm an adult and I don't need to explain myself to you, my
other children or anyone else," I shot back.  "Whether anything is or isn't
going on is my business and not yours, so I think we should end this
discussion now."

"I'm sorry, Dad, but I can't," he replied.  "I'm pretty sure about what's
happening here and I just don't understand it.  For God's sake, you were
married to Mom all those years and together had us four kids, but now it
turns out you're gay?  How could you disgrace her memory like this?"

"Michael, I was married to your mother for many years, and they were very
good years too," I said.  "We had four beautiful children, who have in turn
given me three beautiful grandchildren, and I wish she was here to enjoy
them too, but that was obviously not meant to be.  I met Jake when some of
the boys helped his son out of a threatening situation and they have since
become a part of this family as well.  Jake and I have a great deal in
common and it's nice to have someone nearer my own age to talk to once in a
while.  Beside that, he also helps me manage this mad house and take care
of the boys, and I think that's all you need to know."

"But are you gay?" he demanded.

"No, Michael, I am not," I replied.  "If you must put a label on it, then
you might say I'm bisexual, not merely gay."

"But you're sleeping with another guy," he shot back.

"You don't know that.  You're only speculating," I corrected.

"Well, unless you are willing to swear to me you aren't and tell me
directly that I am wrong," he continued, "I'm afraid my wife and I won't be
coming here any more -- and my children won't either."

"Why?  I'm no different now than I was before," I challenged.

"Maybe not, but I don't want my family to be part of anything like this and
I don't want my children exposed to seeing their grandfather cavorting with
another man," he spat out, angrily.  "I've talked to Marie, Adrian, Robert
and Elizabeth, and we've all suspected some of our new brothers might be
gay and we've learned to accept that, but we can't accept the fact we now
have a gay father."  I just stared at Michael, as I digested his comment.

"So you're telling me that the others all feel the same way you do?" I
asked.

"Yes, Dad, I am," he stated, emphatically.  We just stared at each other
for a few moments, before I found my voice again.

"Why don't you go get them, because I want to hear it out of their mouths,"
I told him.  I wasn't exactly sure why I demanding this, as I felt I might
be setting myself up to get hurt even worse, but it was already done.

Michael nodded and left the room, but quickly returned with his siblings
and their spouses.  I studied their faces as they entered and immediately
realized this situation probably wasn't going to turn out in my favor.

"Michael tells me that unless I deny that Jake and I are involved in any
way, he and his family won't be coming here any more," I began.  "He also
told me the rest of you agree with him about this and will follow his lead.
Is this true?"  No one answered and my two daughters just let their heads
drop to their chests, as they began to stare at the floor.

"Well, I guess I have my answer then," I acknowledged, sadly.  "No matter
what you think, and I will not deny or confirm any of your allegations, but
I will only add that I have not changed in any way since your mother died.
You will always be welcome here, but I take it I won't be seeing any of you
again soon.  You do what you think you have to do, and so will I, but I am
disappointed that you're taking such a hard line, narrow-minded view of
things."

Having said my piece, I left the room and continued out the front door.  I
didn't know where I was going, but I knew I had to get out of there and
clear my head before it exploded.  I merely began walking up the road, with
no destination in mind.

When I returned, maybe forty minutes to an hour later, I merely sat on the
swing on the front porch for a while, since I wasn't ready to be confronted
again.  However, I wasn't alone for long, for that's when my younger son,
Robert, discovered me.  It seemed he felt he needed to talk to me, so he
could clarify his position.

"Dad, I don't agree with Michael and I don't care what's going on between
you and Jake.  Michael told us what you said, about you're both consenting
adults and all, and I agree.  You obviously don't flaunt whatever it is you
might be doing and we only discovered it because of some innocent snooping,
so to speak.  If being with Jake is what makes you happy, then I say go for
it, but I'm afraid I might be the only one who feels this way.

"Don't be angry with them, Dad, because I think they'll change their minds
once they consider this more fully.  I hope this is merely something
they've decided in haste and will eventually come to realize you're still
the same guy we've always loved.  I'm hoping once they have had time to
think this through more fully, they will realize how foolishly they've
acted.  I know you raised us to be open-minded, but that's not the view our
peers shared and I'm afraid their friends influenced my brother and sisters
more than you and mom.

"The way I see it," Robert continued, "unless they are willing to approach
this subject logically and dispassionately, and are willing to admit there
is nothing wrong in what you're doing, they will all eventually regret the
price they are going to have to pay for their narrow outlook on life."

"Thank you, Robert," I told him, once he'd finished.  "Your support means a
great deal to me, and I'm glad to know not all of my children are deserting
me over this issue."  At this point he wrapped his arms around me and gave
me a big hug.

"I love you, Dad, and nothing will ever change that," he stated, before he
released me.

I thanked him again, before he went back inside, but I wasn't alone for
very long.  Almost immediately, Marie, my older daughter, came out to speak
privately with me too.

"Dad, I don't agree with Michael," she informed me, "but unfortunately my
husband does.  Rather than fight him and possibly jeopardize my marriage,
I'll go along with him for now, but I wanted you to know I still love you.
I will talk to Adrian and try to get him to see he's wrong in his beliefs,
but it may take some time.  Until then, I'll probably only talk to you on
the phone or online.  I'm sorry it turned out like this, but Adrian is like
his parents, very conservative and sometimes bigoted in his beliefs.  I'm
afraid this is one of those times when it will make things difficult for
all of us."

"Thanks, honey, and I appreciate your support," I told her.  "I also
understand your dilemma, so you do what you have to do and don't jeopardize
your family over me.  I don't want to be responsible for creating any
turbulence in your marriage."

"Oh, I think we'll get past this," she replied, "or at least I hope we
will.  I have a feeling your grandson will drive my husband crazy, if he's
not allowed to come visit you and his other uncles any longer.  I'm pretty
sure Robert agrees with me on this, but I think Elizabeth and Michael
pretty much see eye-to-eye on this issue."

"Thanks again, honey, and I've already talked to Robert," I informed her.
"Too bad he's single, because now this will affect my relationship with all
my grandchildren too."

"Don't worry, Dad.  This will all blow over in time," she suggested.  "Just
hang in there until it does."

"Okay, honey, and thanks for being so supportive," I responded, before I
kissed her, and she went back inside.

I thought I'd now have some time to digest what had happened, but I had
only a short time alone, before Jake found me next.

"Josh, I think we need to talk," he began.

"Not now, Jake," I told him, trying to put him off for the time being, but
he obviously wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer.

"Josh, we have to talk now," he insisted.  "I've overheard a little about
what's going on with your children and I can move into Shannon's room
instead, or Shannon and I can find our own place now.  No matter how much I
love you, I'd rather not be the one who causes a rift in your family and
keeps you from spending time with your grandchildren."

"No, Jake, I'm not going to coddle them," I replied.  "It's not you who is
driving this wedge between my children and me.  They are the ones doing
this and it is their acceptance of a bigoted, narrow-minded viewpoint
that's splitting the family.  I do not want you to leave and nothing is
going to change, because I could not stand losing you on top of everything
else that has happened.  If my children can't accept what we have together
and decide to shun us, then I don't want them in my life either."  I just
looked him squarely in the eye, trying to let him see how much he truly
meant to me.

"Josh, you know you don't mean that and that's not what you want.  There's
no way you'll be happy without your grandchildren in your life and I know
you find it extremely difficult to handle not seeing them in the future.
However, that's exactly what will happen, as long as I'm still here.  Josh,
I will do this for your sake, but we can still be close, even if we aren't
sharing the same bedroom."

"NO! Fuck them and the ones who feel this way can go to hell.  I'll handle
whatever I have to handle, but I know I couldn't handle it if you and
Shannon weren't still in my life.  In time, maybe my stubborn children will
change their minds, but if not, then I no longer need them.  I will not be
told what to do, like some misbehaving child.  I am their father -- they
are not mine!"  I hoped my last statement would be the end of the
discussion, but Jake wasn't going to let it drop easily.

"Well, I won't be able to deal with knowing I came between you, your
children and grandchildren.  Maybe you can pretend this isn't going to
effect you, but it is already having an impact on me.  I will not be the
cause of you not being able to see your children and grandchildren in the
future."

"Jake, if that happens, you will not be the cause of it, by any means.  The
cause of that happening will be due to the right wing, conservative,
back-woods outlook expressed by my grown children.  I know they've accepted
the fact that some of the boys might be gay, although we never confronted
them directly with the issue, but I guess they draw the line when it comes
to me.  Robert and Marie seem to be okay with it, but Adrian is forcing
Marie's hand.  The other two seem to have drawn the proverbial line in the
sand, so they'll have to be the ones to cross over it, if anyone ever
does."

"But Josh..." I cut him off.

"Jake, they're old enough to make up their own minds and it's the way my
wife and I raised them.  We wanted them to be strong, independent
individuals and each of them thanked us for making them self-sufficient
when they were in college.  They often told us they were about the only
ones who could actually do most things for themselves.

"Even though we taught them to be self-reliant, I thought we'd also taught
them to make educated and enlightened choices, but I guess we failed there.
However, since they've made their choice, they will have to live with the
consequences that result from their decisions; just as I've had to do for
the many choices I've made in my life.  I think it's best we just put this
subject behind us now and move on.  I don't want to dwell on this matter
any longer."

I wasn't sure I had convinced Jake, but he didn't argue with me further
and, eventually, went back inside.  The next thing I saw was my older
children loading up their belongings in our vehicles, so our older drivers
could take them to catch their flights.  Jake was originally going to do
this, but I felt he wouldn't be able to make the trip without commenting on
what they had said or were doing.  Therefore, I asked Mark and Frankie if
they'd be willing to drive them and they both agreed.

I sat on the porch, rocking in the swing, as they prepared to leave.  I
didn't even bother to get up to say good-bye, figuring if they didn't feel
a farewell was in order, then neither did I.  Robert and my grandsons were
the only ones to come over to me before he took off.

My grandsons were very emotional, since they had heard their parents state
they wouldn't be coming here any more, although they hadn't heard the
comments about Jake and I.  Therefore, they both wanted to know why they
couldn't come visit any longer.

"Did we do something to make you mad, Papa?" Nicky asked, with a very sad
expression on his face.

"No, you boys have done nothing," I assured them.  "It's just that your
parents don't agree with some things I'm doing here and have decided they
don't want to be part of my life any longer."

"Can they do that?" Jordan asked, confused.

"They are old enough to make their own choices," I confirmed, "so I won't
try to change their minds."

"But what if we want to come spend time with you?  Can we still do that?"
Jordan continued.

"You're always welcome here, but I don't feel your parents will allow you
to do so any longer," I advised.

"Then we'll make up own minds, like they did," Nicky stated, defiantly.

"Your not old enough to go against your parents yet," I stated.  "As long
as you are below the age when you can be on your own, you'll have to do
what your parents tell you."

They each looked upset that I didn't encourage their stance and Jordan
decided to clarify it.  "They aren't listening to you, so why should we do
what they tell us?" he asked.

"You need to obey your parents and do as they say," I reiterated, "until
you're old enough to be on your own.  Until then, I'll be thinking of you,
loving you in my heart and praying your parents change their minds."

They weren't happy with this, but went off to join their parents to return
home.  After they left me, Robert approached one final time.

"Don't give up, Dad," he told me.  "Maybe they'll see the light yet.  I
still love you and will keep in touch.  I also think you'll hear from Marie
as well, so not all is lost."

I thanked him again for his support and told him I had chatted with Marie
earlier, before he took off to catch his ride.

Once my older children left, I rounded up the others and we went inside to
discuss another issue.  I wanted to find out who was interested in helping
the Beckers; since I promised Albert I'd only use volunteers.  I had taken
time to ask Mark and Frankie before they left and both agreed to do what
they could, although Mark could only help out on the weekends.  I think
I'll use him on Saturdays and let him have Sunday to himself.

Before I could even broach the subject of helping out on the farm, some of
the boys began to ask me other questions.  They had heard snippets of
conversations between their oldest siblings and seemed more upset than Jake
or I about what had happened.  I tried to downplay the events that had
transpired earlier, by explaining to the boys that everyone is free to make
up his own mind and each of us has to do what he thinks is best for himself
and his family.  Although they agreed in principal with what I had said,
they were still upset about what this meant for me.  I could see the wheels
turning in many of their heads, as they endeavored to figure out a way to
defuse this crisis.

To get their minds off my problems, I talked to everyone about Mrs. Becker
and her health related issues.  It seemed as though the boys had also
noticed her swings in lucidity when they had approached her to say hello.
Instead of responding as they expected, she would either ask if she knew
them or made some off the wall comment about something else.  Concerned,
they confronted Little Ricky about his mother's condition.

Even though he was a bit embarrassed by it, and even a little ashamed, he
filled them in on some of the things that had been going on.  I let them
know Mr. Becker and Little Ricky could use a break from their workload and
suggested we could take turns going out to the farm, so we could help them
out.  I suggested we could go to the farm in small groups of maybe two,
three or four at a time, and then stay for up to a week to lend a hand.
Since they were somewhat familiar with the various jobs on the farm, they
knew what would be required of them.

The boys all seemed to think this was a good idea and volunteered to
participate.  Even Peter offered to go and help out too, although I told
him he didn't have to.  He said he didn't mind and would go out with Ricky,
so I told him that would be fine, if it's what he wanted.  I also let them
get together and figure out who would go out with whom, but I would make
out a schedule determining when they would go.  I realized some of them had
probably volunteered just so they could spend some time with Little Ricky,
but I also knew they wanted to relieve him of some of his burden.  They all
realized how difficult it must be for him to cope with his mother's
condition, especially during the times when she didn't even recognize him.

I also told them it looked as if Little Ricky now wanted to be called
Richard, since that was what Mr. Becker was doing.  I wasn't certain, but
suspected, like Frankie, he was trying to make a statement by doing this
and using this as his way to forge a more mature identity.  The boys all
said they understood and agreed to try to remember to call him Richard when
they were with him.

After I made out a quick schedule and filled in the various groups that
wanted to work together, I called Mr. Becker to confirm the arrangements.
Jake or I would drive the groups out and leave them for the week, figuring
this would take some of the pressure off Albert and Little Ricky, excuse me
-- Richard, and give them a little respite.

He thanked me several times and asked me to relay his gratitude to my sons,
but he'd also do that personally, when they came out to the farm.  He also
said it would be good for Richard to have their company, as it might take
his mind off of worrying about his mother.  After talking a little longer,
I told him we'd see him this weekend.

Now that was settled, I began working on finalizing our vacation plans.
Things had changed drastically, since Cody was gone and it didn't look as
if my grandsons would be joining us either.  I just hope it doesn't turn
out to be a big bust.


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