Date: Wed, 25 Jun 2003 04:49:41 -0700 (PDT)
From: Dscreet Dude <ihaveaview@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Jake's Story Chap-2

Copyright 2003 by Jacob Pritchard. All rights
reserved.

No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted
in any form or by any means electronic or mechanical,
except in the case of reviews, without written
permission from the Author. Jacob Pritchard is a
pseudonym for the actual author who wishes to remain
undisclosed. He may be contacted by emailing
ihaveaview@yahoo.com

This is a fictional story involving alternative sexual
relationships. If this type of material offends you,
please do not read any further. This material is
intended for mature adult audiences. Names,
characters, locations and incidents are either the
product of the author's imagination or are used
fictitiously.  Any resemblance to actual events or
locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely
coincidental.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - - - - - -

Jake's Story  ~ Chapter Two ~
So the next morning came, mother yelling up the steps
to make sure we were moving, school starting in less
than an hour. I could smell bacon and coffee wafting
through the air along with the other smells a small
rural town seems to inadvertently produce.  As I
rubbed the sleep from my eyes and stretched the
night's rest from my young wiry body, I could see our
old faithful mutt, Cloe, looking up at me from her
post at the door.  She'd turned 13 that winter and her
graying coat attested to the many years she'd been
around. Her head was droopy and her tongue was hanging
out as she panted, obviously waiting for us to get our
butts in gear. It was part of her morning routine
because she anticipated us arriving at the breakfast
table where she would be sure to get a handout or two
of Mom's vittles. For us too we had a usual morning
routine, for without it there would be chaos, fighting
and Mom's quick hand on our backsides. She gave a
little impatient yelp, popping her head up in the
process and promptly sat down, as if it had been quite
an effort for her.

Jimmy and Willy were already up and probably in the
bathroom doing their morning business. Cloe gave
another little yelp to encourage me to get moving, so
I swung my legs over the side of the bed and gave her
the evil eye with a little growl that seemed to make
her happy.  She came trotting over to me and licked
one of my feet telling me good morning. As I sat on
the edge of the bed and looked out the window at the
bright morning Cloe wandered over to Willys bedside
where his socks lay on the floor. I glanced down at
her just as she was sniffing them and then started
licking one of them. At that moment the past evening's
events slowly came back to me and I realized that she
was licking the sock that Willy had thrown off the
bed, which I guessed seemed odd to me. I hopped down
off the bed and walked over to where the socks lay,
one folded in half, the one Cloe was now licking.

"What ya doin's Cloe? Why ya lickin' this here ole
sock like that? Ya wanna get athletes mouth or
sumthin' like that?"  I was just in my briefs and I
could feel the cool morning bringing chilly bumps to
my legs and arms. I had gotten down on my knees with
my butt resting on my heels and my arm around Cloe's
neck, giving her a hug and looking into her face. With
one arm still around her I picked up the sock to look
at it closer. Cloe was still trying to smell it and I
turned some so that she couldn't get to it. Why was
she so interested in smelling this sock?

Nothing seemed to be unusual about it so I held it up
to my nose and gave a quick whiff. I don't think I
even thought that this might be an odd thing to do at
the time. I really didn't get queasy about things like
that.  Maybe it was just part of being a boy. Besides,
Cloe found it interesting.

It didn't smell like feet, or like my brother's dirty
old Chuck's that he wore every where. No, this sock
seemed pretty clean, almost like it hadn't been worn
since it was washed.  It was still soft and I could
smell the outdoors from where it had hung on the
clothesline that ran the length of our backyard. But,
there was another smell there, something sweet, yet
stale. It wasn't the sock, and it wasn't the smell
associated with feet. And something else about the
sock; it seemed a little damp. Taking my arm from
around Cloe I opened the folded sock and got a
stronger whiff of what I had just smelled. It wasn't a
bad smell, not offensive or anything, so I put my nose
right down next to it and got a better whiff.  I
remember this moment distinctly.  I pulled back a
little from it, with the sock still unfolded in my
hand and took a few short sniffs, letting the odor
register. It was like something primitive clicked and
I was somewhat mesmerized by strange feelings in my
belly. I recall blinking a coupla times and wrinkling
my nose, and then taking another whiff, my eyes
distant as I contemplated this new smell.

It was then that I was startled by the abrupt feeling
of cold wet hands on my back and my brother Willy
saying, "Hey Squirt, ya better hurry or there won't be
any breakfast left for ya 'cause Cloe will eat it
all."

I gave a short cry from the suddenness of his cold
hands and rolled over on the floor away from him, the
sock still in my hand. I saw his eyes go to where his
sock was grasped in my hand now.

"Whatcha got my sock for? That needs to go into the
dirty clothes squirt and you need to get ready for
school!" He bent over to pick up his Chucks. He sat on
the edge of his bed and just kinda grinned at me. I
grinned back at him and threw his sock at him.

"I was just picking up some dirty clothes, but that
doesn't seem to be dirty," I said and headed off to
the bathroom for my morning routine.

I should also probably make a side note here that
Willy was a pretty laid back kind of kid.  There
wasn't too much that seemed to bother him. I think now
it was part of his always wanting to be cool, but I
also know now that it was just part of his nature. He
always seemed to take things in stride and never got
too excited about anything. Maybe that's why a lot of
the older kids liked him too.
By the time I finished in the bathroom and got back to
our room Willy had headed down to breakfast.  But I
knew that Mom would make sure there was enough bacon
and eggs for all of us and that we'd trickle down as
our routines allowed us. Jimmy was already dressed but
still lacing up his shoes.  Although we were twins Mom
had long ago quit making us wear the same identical
clothes.  I liked to wear the dress style pants and
Jimmy almost always wore jeans. It was his trademark I
think.  And both him and Willy sported the Chucks
sneakers. I think it had something to do with their
love of sports. For me, at this time in my life I
liked to wear slip on loafers when the weather
permitted.

Though Jimmy and I were twins and had always shared
the same bed that was about where our relationship
ended. There wasn't a whole lot we had in common.  I
don't think a lot of brothers do.  It's part of
creating their own identity, competition for parents
love and just being an individual. We really didn't
look much alike and a lot of folk were surprised to
find out that we were brothers, let alone twins. Jimmy
loved sports and was always looking to play basketball
or baseball with someone. At ten years old he was
especial quite good at basketball and would spend a
lot of his free time out at our basketball hoop setup
next to the gravel alley that run along the side of
our yard. Subsequently Jim's friends were all kids
that held the same passion for sports and especially
basketball. They all had the trading cards of their
favorite teams and players and would often set
cross-legged on the back porch debating the merits of
each player, swapping cards and trying to figure which
team would end up on top that season.

"Ya know we got that big spelling test today, right?
Ya ready fer it?"  He asked, as he finished tying a
knot in the dirty shoestrings that held the Chuck's
onto his feet.

"Y-E-S", I said.  "R-U-2?"

"Ready to spell
super-calla-fragilistic-expealla-pecker-docious if she
asks!" He said back, gave me a smile and headed down
the steps.  He was a kid of few words.

We were both in fifth grade and school would be over
in little more than a month. It was a very special
year for me, and for my brothers too I suppose.  The
following summer a new addition had been built on to
one of the school's buildings creating four new
classrooms and brand new bathrooms. Three of the big
rooms would now house the fifth and sixth graders from
our expanding elementary and the fourth was to be used
by the adjoining high school as a home economics
class.  My brother and I ended up being part of an
experiment they would try at school that year where
select kids from both the fifth and sixth grade would
be combined into one class, creating an accelerated
learning environment. The remainder of the kids not
chosen were each assigned to the remaining two
classrooms, separated as normal by their respective
grade levels. I always felt bad for those kids. I
think they felt branded the rest of their school
years.

In my class there would be one teacher for both grades
with a lot of the subjects taught at the same time to
both levels. We were to take additional field trips,
have guest speakers on specialized subjects and were
required to do additional work at home for classroom
projects. We would intermingle with the other grade
level and supposedly benefit from helping and being
helped by each other. This would have been the
mid-sixties, so I'm not sure if this was part of the
lower-power generation's idea or just some new wacky
idea the people in charge of these things come up
with.

Now I wasn't a dumb kid, but I sure didn't think I was
too smart.  I mean, the studying and learning didn't
come easy to me and I was often frustrated trying to
comprehend something while I saw my twin easily absorb
all that was put on his educational plate. And so now
I wonder what it was they saw in me that had them
putting me in this class with all the brainy kids.
Really.  I don't think I looked much further around me
than what was immediate. I never thought very far
ahead, didn't seem to have an actual talent for
anything in particular, and was pretty lazy when it
came to homework and studying. I do remember taking a
few tests prior to fifth grade where they checked your
IQ and asked ya a bunch of questions with true or
false answers and those little circles ya had to fill
in with ".....only a No. 2 pencil, please."  There
always seemed to be a least 2 of the answers that had
to be correct but ya could only check one. I used to
chew the heck outta those pencils.

But, regardless of what I thought, here I was in this
special class, with Jimmy and Willy both. I tend to
think my mother had something to do with it, but maybe
I'm cutting myself a little short too.  And surprise,
surprise I wasn't doing too bad.  I think I ended up
with a B-minus average, which, with my attention span
was probably more than I deserved. Jimmy and Willy
both did better, always bringing home A's, seemingly
with little effort. It may have had something to do
with their competitive spirit, but more likely it was
just because they were smart and the schoolwork came
easily.

Another thing to note about this was that my brother
and I were younger than most of the other kids in our
class. We'd been born in late September and this had
something to do with us getting into first grade a
year earlier than most kids. I know my mother had a
lot to do with that too. So we were five years old in
first grade and ten in fifth grade. It also meant that
we were seventeen when we graduated. The influence
that being with older, more mature kids had to have
had some impact on us in some way. I don't think it
really held us back, but maybe we were exposed to
certain things before we were mentally ready?

Anyway, without Cloe there to keep me going I got
dressed for school and headed down for breakfast. Just
my two youngest siblings were there since they
wouldn't be in school yet. There was always a good
breakfast at home.  My Mother loved to cook and took
the responsibility of caring for her kids and the home
they lived in quite seriously. It seemed as if she was
always cleaning or cooking or washing or canning or
doing some major chore around the house. At that time
only my kid brother and my little sister would stay
home. He would have been three then and my sister had
just turned five. So, besides getting us off to school
and taking care of her large house she would be taking
care of these two. When I wasn't in school I often got
the job of watching them both and keeping them busy
while my mother attended to one of the many things she
did. I adored my little sister and thought she was the
cutest thing. She was also spoiled rotten, not mom but
by Dad who thought the world of his cute little
blonde-haired beauty. She learned early how to utilize
her cute looks and innocent demeanor to get what she
wanted.  I think that's the same for most women. But,
ya couldn't resist giving in to her because of her
cuteness.  And besides, she really was a pretty sweet
lil kid. Her name was Samantha, but everyone called
her Sammy, and later on it would be shortened to Sam,
the same name she carries today. Dad would say that
God had sent an Angel to us and that we should get
down on our knees every day and thank him for his
generosity. I wondered if God knew all the little
things his Angel did that would get us in trouble.

My kid brother's name was Dane and he genuinely seemed
to like me.  I was about the only one that would play
with him and actually enjoyed it. He especially liked
dragging me around the house by my hand and telling me
about everything he saw, and somehow I could
understand him and his toddlers language. Wrestling
was a favorite thing of his and I would always let him
beat me, him ending up on top and tickling me. This
closeness changed a bit as I got older and started
running with the wrong kids and doing things I
shouldn't have.

As I had said earlier my kid brother Dane was born in
1963 on Jimmy and I's birthday. Our birthday was
always at the same time there was a large
country-style fair going on in the county seat. It was
one of the treats we'd get for our birthday; being
taken to the fair for rides, popcorn, the parade and
of course a trip to the cow and sheep barns.
That particular year my mother had gone into the
hospital to have a baby. Having the baby part really
didn't register with me; isn't that what moms do? I
never had realized exactly what it was that was going
on with her and having this baby thing.

  My father had parked our old Ford station wagon in
the big field where a volunteer fireman had told him
to. The five of us kids were pretty excited about the
fair and had chatted expectantly about it during the
twenty-mile bumpy trip there. My Uncle Frank had come
along. He was my Mother's youngest brother and was
only about fifteen or sixteen at the time.
Curiously my father wasn't leading us towards the
fairgrounds, but in the other direction towards the
large grayish hospital that was adjacent to the
fairgrounds. He had us stand in a little grassy area
outside the front of the building. He spoke quietly to
Uncle Frank and Willy about something, and leaving
them in charge he went inside with all of us duly
holding hands in a line. He had said he had a surprise
for us and that it was one of Jimmy and my birthday
presents. Of course this made us pretty durn excited.
A trip to the fair AND something unexpected from this
big building. I couldn't imagine what it could be and
didn't even know what to expect, and waited
expectantly clutching my little sister's hand.
"I know what yer getting and believe me I don't think
I'd want one of those things running around my house,"
Uncle Frank said, looking at us sideways and grinning.

"Yep," said Willy, "If I had one of those things
running around the house I don't think I'd be too
happy. Especially when ya gotta clean up all the crap
those things put out and put up with the noise."

Oh boy oh boy! We were getting another dog! My Dad was
letting us get another dog! Mom had said one dog was
enough for us kids, but here, Dad was going to get us
one outta the hospital.  It didn't even occur to me to
wonder why they kept dogs in hospitals.  Heck, I'd
clean up the crap and train it and feed it and play
with it and be the best master a dog ever had. This
was going to be real neat!

"A dog?" I said excitedly. "Dad's getting us another
dog from there?," letting go of my sisters hand and
pointing towards the hospital.

"Oh yea!" Jimmy said, looking quickly at me and
grinning. "I get to name him! We'll call him Buster."

"No, it's no dog you simple twerps. It's somethin'
much better." Said Uncle Frank. He looked at Willy and
winked, both of them grinning at their little secret.

No dog, huh? Hmmm, what could it be that craps all
over the house and would be good for a birthday
present? We chatted excitedly back and forth about it
for a few moments with Uncle Frank and Willy smirking
knowingly at each other. Sammy squealed, let go of my
hand and, pointing towards the hospital, said
brightly, "Mommy!"  We all looked in the direction she
was pointing and could see Mother looking out a second
floor window, smiling and waving at us. I still
remember how pretty she looked and the big smile that
was on her face. I forgot all about my birthday and
the surprise that Daddy was bringing back. Her hair
was black as coal, she had on her Cateye glasses,
popular then, and a white nightshirt with blue trim on
its collar.

We all waved back and Sammy even blew her kisses.  She
turned away from he window and I could see my father
behind her holding something, which he handed to her.
When she turned back to the window she lifted up for
us to see what she held cradled in her arms. She had a
baby. A baby. I had said I was naïve, and this was
another one of those moments that this was evidently
true.  I didn't have a clue, or at least didn't expect
this to happen. For the life of me I can't figure why
I was that way. It just seems to be odd behavior or
abnormal in some way.

Now, my Mother obviously had been pregnant for the
past nine months, at least the last three I had to
have known something was going on. I mean, she was
getting pretty large and there must have been some
other things going on to let me know that this was
going to happen; baby shower, women talk, a bassinet
being set up.  I don't remember my sister being born,
only being three at the time. So I didn't associate my
Mother's "pregnant" condition with the upcoming
addition of a sibling. And really, I don't recall any
of us kids talking about it, nor my Mother preparing
us for the new arrival.

Nope, for me this was pretty unexpected and I remember
just standing there with probably a vacant stare on my
face and puzzled by what I saw before my eyes. Mom had
a baby and instinctively I knew it was hers, or ours,
or whatever. With grins on their faces, Willy and
Uncle Frank looked at Jimmy and I. "So howse ya like
yer birthday present? He's a boy!"  Willy said. He
turned to look at Uncle Frank and gave a snotty lil
"Heh, heh, heh!"

I looked at Jimmy and felt a sick feeling go through
my whole body, like I was gonna get sick and puke
right there. We got a baby for our birthday? Is this a
joke or what?! I didn't have a clue about how to take
care of a baby. And I know that's the last thing I
expected to be getting for any reason! So I just did
what comes natural to any kid that finds theirself in
a situation he can't figure how to deal with; I
started bawling. I was silly like that.

So there I was, holding on to my brothers hand, my
little sister probably looking up at me quizzically,
my Mother and Father wondering what was going on with
their little boy and Uncle Frank and Willy probably
thinking I was a real dork, standing there with my
face all scrunched up, crying and in a panic.  I
reckon they were all staring at me and trying to
figure out who had hit me or just what the heck I was
going off on now.

Willy was the first to say something and it didn't
take him long. "Whatsa matter Squirt? Why ya bawlin'
like that?" He had come over to stand in front of me,
and kinda bent over putting his face close to mine and
his hand on my shoulder. It was a nice, caring thing
for him to do.

I looked past him to where I could see Mom holding the
baby, Dad behind her with his hand on her shoulder.
Pointing towards the window and Mom I said, "I don't
know how to take care of no baby. I don't need no
baby, I jus' wanna a dog or cat or sumpthin', " and
let out a sob and wiped at the tears that were coming
down my face.

"Oh Jakey, we're jus' kidding ya. That's all of us's
baby brother up there and we're all gonna take care of
him together. We jus' tol' ya that 'cause it was you
and Jimmy's birthday." Willy told me this and put his
arm around me, hugging me like a big brother would,
giving me a playful little punch in the arm. And he
chuckled.  I know now it was funny, but it took me a
little while to get over it and I still feel goofy
about it to this day.

So, I guess that was a pretty good joke for a long
while after that and still bears repeating every year
when we get together to share our birthdays. And I
bear the playful reminder each year, each time the
story is told. But it is a good indicator of how I was
sensitive to teasing from an early age. There would be
many instances of teasing throughout my life that I
resented and for long periods of time would hold a
grudge against those that would perpetrate pranks
against me. I bore no remorse against my brother or my
Uncle for that day's folly, though they would give me
reasons to later on in life.

We waved goodbye to my Mother and the newest member of
our family, my father made his way out from the
hospital and enjoyed hearing of my little dilemma and
hugged me for it. Of course we then made it to the
parade and spent the rest of the birthday enjoying the
fair, the prank forgotten for the moment.

My Mother greeted me that school morning seven years
or so later with her usual "Hi Honey. Yer eggs are on
the table and there's toast on the stove. Don't ferget
yer prayers."  I grabbed some toast,  ruffled Dane's
hair and sat at the table. I bowed my head and did a
quick blessing. Eddie, my other brother was there and
already chatting away, his hair neatly combed and a
napkin tucked into his shirt. He was a neat freak,
always would be.

"Beautiful," my Mother said.

"Yes Ma'am, it sure is," I said, thinking she meant
the beautiful spring morning.

"No, I mean spell it; Beautiful. And use it in a
sentence," and she looked over at me, her hand on a
hip the other holding a dishcloth.

"B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L. You are beautiful when you look at
me that way." I said. And so I spelled the word for
her, along with at least a dozen others as I ate my
breakfast, listened to the others chattering away and
proceeded to spend another typical morning in our
American household. It was always a nice way to start
the day out and I don't ever remembering hating
mornings in those days because of the surety of our
breakfast routine.

We always walked to school since our house was located
directly across the street. Before we left Mom told us
all to get home because her sister, (my Aunt), and our
cousin was coming that afternoon to spend the weekend.
She wanted to make sure our rooms were clean and our
other chores done before they would arrive. We were
always excited when our cousin Benny came since he was
a lot of fun and knew a lot of things that kids from
the big city's knew. There would definitely be a
coupla games of war going on this weekend and maybe
even a water battle or two. My Dad had set our old
army tent up in the yard to air out since we liked to
camp at the local parks and would be doing that soon
enough. He had said it'd be okay for us to sleep out
there a night or two, probably this weekend, so that
was something else we could do.

Benny was Willy's age, just a coupla months younger
actually, but in the same grade. I got along with him
better than the others did since he wasn't into sports
and liked hiking and exploring like I did. His family
lived right next to the big city of Pittsburgh and so
he had a really neat accent from there. He had a way
with stories and what ever he'd tell me I just seemed
to believe without question. He was especially
convincing when he told ghost stories, of which he had
a few personal experiences with. I think he liked me
because I adored him so much and was like the little
brother that he didn't have, only having a sister. He
was quite the novelty to me.

Now, I might add a note here that our family and
especially our extended family had quite a few
purported dealings with the supernatural. Whether you
believe in this type of phenomenon or not isn't for me
to judge. But I will say that I believe, and have many
reasons to. But since I don't believe that has any
bearing on the intent of this story I'll just leave it
at that.  Maybe some other time; it's quite
interesting actually.

So I made it through the day and go home with my other
brothers to do our chores and get our rooms all "redd
up" as my mother would say. My Aunt and Benny were to
be here for supper and showed up shortly before that.
Benny's father, my Uncle, rarely came on these visits.
He was a rough kind of guy and worked road
construction. He oftened worked his Saturdays and then
spent that evening in the local Vet's Hall drinking
with his buddies and doing whatever drunk vets do in
those places. My memories of him from those days has a
picture of a rowdy man, smelling of stale beer and
cigarettes, a rosy red nose and saying things that
were supposed to make ya feel like a tough man. I
wasn't very comfortable around him and always shied
away when he was there. He didn't have a great
relationship with Benny either and I never saw them
get close or show the kind of love our father showed
us. My Uncle wasn't afraid to use his belt on Benny
either when he thought it was necessary, which I guess
was typical for the day and those kind of families.

Benny was a pretty happy go lucky kind of kid
regardless of this though. He wasn't real smart in a
typical sense and that was probably another reason we
got along so well. He wasn't dumb mind ya, he just did
things that some people might think were a little off
the wall. He didn't have the brains for math or
english, reading or science. But what he did have was
street smarts and also what my Dad liked to call,  the
"Knack". The knack was Dad's way of saying someone
knew things about things, intuitively. Benny could
take a lawnmower apart and put it back together by the
time he was thirteen. He could figure out how things
worked just by studying them. And he had a very active
imagination, talking away sometimes for long stretches
about everything and anything.

And so Benny was here for the whole weekend, something
they usually did once a month, and we were going to
have fun. We had our dinner and helped Mom with the
dishes. We all got ice cream on the back porch and
then spent the afternoon playing tag and other games
in our massive backyard. Other kids and our two
cousins in the neighborhood showed up and before too
long we had a water battle going, our first of the
season. It was all good fun and before we knew it the
evening had come and it was time for us to go in.

My mother sent us boys to the basement with
instructions to strip off all our wet clothes and to
get upstairs for baths. And so we did, Willy, Jimmy,
Benny and myself.  Peter had long ago headed in, not
wanting to get too dirty and not into the antics we
were going though.

Being typical boys we had a bit of fun after stripping
down to nothing. There was some strange bit of
excitement as we were all bouncing around naked in the
chilly basement. It was obvious that Willy and Jimmy's
dicks were bigger than either mine or Jimmy's and they
were doing funny things with them, making them swing
up and down and back and forth as they gyrated their
hips. We just laughed and pointed at the funny things
they could do and we couldn't. I was looking at
Willy's pecker more than I usually would have as it
reminded me of what it was he'd been doing the night
before. Nothing seemed to be different, though lately
I had noticed that his dick and balls were bigger and
that he even had some hair there where before there'd
been none. Benny's was bigger than what I remember it
being, but there wasn't no hair. I remember not being
able to take my eyes off of his, it was just
fascinating. He was circumcised and maybe that night
in the basement, being chilly and all, it probably
wasn't more than a couple of inches long. And I
thought, that's beautiful, I wish my dick was just
like that.  Of course I was probably of normal size
for my age and uncircumcised. I didn't know about
circumcision and can't remember actually thinking
about it any.  I just liked the way his dick looked
better than mine, although I knew that mine looked the
same under the skin when I would pull the skin back to
clean myself.

And, as we horsed around there something strange
happened to me; I started getting a boner. I really
didn't notice it at first, not 'til Benny came up
behind me and, reaching around me, grabbed me by the
dick. It was just a bit more of the horsing around we
were doing, but it gave me an unexpected thrill as I
whipped around to confront him. Of course he was naked
too and I was able to grab at his pecker, but wasn't
able to get hold of it. And then it seemed everyone
was grabbing at each other and slapping butts. It was
all in good, innocent fun, but it had it's effect on
me; I had a full fledged boner!  And it didn't go
unnoticed. As the others raced up the basement steps
still grab-assing I felt a hand on my shoulder and,
turning around, Benny was grabbing my hand pulling me
back down the stairs. Somehow I knew he wanted
something. He was the last in the basement and with
the others gone upstairs we were left alone.

"Dude, look at you! You look pretty excited! How come
you got that boner boy?" He said with a big grin
spread across his face. He had his hand on my shoulder
and was gently squeezing it. I was smiling because it
was kinda like we were still horsing around. But it
had felt neat. I looked down at myself and saw that my
little pecker was standing straight up, rigid as a
rock. And it wasn't something I had really thought
about much before, or even then.

"Yea, it gets like that sometimes, I dunno why.  But,
yours is like that too."  I said, pointing at his own
pecker, now as hard as mine was, but bigger.

"Well, do ya know why they get like that Jakey?" And
as he asked that his hand moved down my shoulder,
across my chest, over my belly and grabbed my dick
gently, his fingers around the head of it. I didn't
think there was anything wrong about this; remember, I
was pretty naïve about the whole thing. I do remember
reacting with a shudder and my dick jumping. It was
maybe the first sexual emotion that I'd ever felt, the
rush going from my balls up through my belly and into
my head. My eyes even did something weird, going out
of focus for just a short moment. I was rather
speechless, and gave a gasp and just gave him a goofy
grin back. He was twisting my dickhead back and forth
in his fingers and up and down while he looked me in
the eye, grinning. The feeling was sensational.
"It's so it'll feel good like this." He said as he
continued what he was doing and grinning at me.  I
looked down at his pecker and remember thinking it
looked perfect. Why, I don't know, except that maybe
it was something that was attractive to me, or I was
attracted to. I looked up at him, still feeling all
this sexual emotion as he continued to stroke me,
talking softly, in a soothing way to me. I was just
speechless except for a little involuntary moan I let
out.

He stopped and said, "It's good isn't it? I do it all
the time. It gets even better."  And walking towards
the stairs he said, "Maybe I can show you some more
later. Let's git upstairs."  He grabbed a towel from a
pile on the washing machine, threw it at me and then
got one for himself. I caught the towel, but the whole
time I still couldn't say anything and just followed
him with my eyes, a goofy look on my face, glancing
over his naked body once more.

To this day the image of him standing there, before he
wrapped the towel around himself, is etched in my
mind. He would have been thirteen at the time, maybe
five foot tall at most, minimal amount of baby fat
still on defined muscles from shoveling snow, yard
work and the other physical work I knew his Dad had
him do. He had blonde hair then, and still does, as
well as a nice smile and dark blue eyes. Puberty must
have just recently come upon him as there was only a
smidgen of sandy colored pubic hair, more fuzz than
anything. His testicles weren't very big and were
scrunched up in a chilled sac below his erect pecker.
He turned towards the stairs and I could see a nice
butt  as he covered it with the towel, said "Let's go
Jake," and headed up the stairs.

This whole scenario probably lasted but one minute,
but as I relived that moment in the years to come each
second seemed to contain mountains of feelings,
emotions and confusing thoughts. I wasn't really sure
what had just happened, never having experienced
anything like it. It was really the first conscious
sexual action I had been part of, either alone or with
another. I knew somehow that it was something to do
with "S" word that I'd occasionally heard other boys
talk about, and that it was part of the mystery that
Willy had alluded to, what he'd been doing just the
night before. It was something the neighborhood dogs
did and got stuck doing. It was supposed to be "dirty"
and not something good boys did, whatever it was. It
was hinted at in so many things that we did, yet not
discussed with little boys who didn't need to know.
The Beatles sung about it, the hippies on TV said it
should be free, and Roger, the nineteen year old kid
down the street had to marry Mary Jane because of it.

It was sex, and with all the emotions I was
experiencing at that moment, the surprise of Benny
grabbing me and rubbing me the way he had, and the way
I felt in the pit of my stomach, and how I was
mesmerized, I knew something then and there; I had
enjoyed what had just happened. Oh yea, I had really
enjoyed it, and would replay that moment for a long
time.

But ya know, I'm like that.  I'll go along for a long
time just not really even thinking about something or
the significance of anything in particular. It may be
something so obvious to others around me, but I'll
just be floating there in my own little world, perhaps
daydreaming, thinking about the stories in my books or
the drama in the TV programs. And then, BAM!,
realization hits me. My eyes are opened and, halleluia
I see the light!

And so it was for me that day. I had just experienced
something that would in some way or other consume me
for the rest of my life. At least to this point of my
life as I turn forty-seven in another month.  So that
was thirty-five years ago. Wow, so long ago. So very
long ago. Three fourths of my life. And there is no
hint of abatement. No, in fact it seems to only get
more intense as I get older, and bolder. But, again I
regress.

I came around as my thirteen year old cousin
disappeared up the stairs, wrapped the towel around
myself and followed. There was a little "tent" in
front of me as I still was wearing my boner. As I made
my way up the stairs and into the kitchen area my
Mother and Aunt were there and the room was full of
the smell of cooking food and the sounds that go along
with preparing a meal for an active group of kids.

My Mother glanced over at me from her station at the
stove, smiled and said, "You git yerself upstairs now
Jakey and git yerself ready for supper. Yer face is
dirty so make sure ya wash it and wash yer hands too."
 She was holding a spatula up and had her other hand
on her hip. "And you tell yer brothers to hurry up too
'cause supper will be ready in just about five
minutes."

Then my Aunt looked at me, with a common smile as she
surveyed her scrawny little nephew. "And you tell
Benny to make sure he puts on some clean underwear
too!", and looking at my mother said, "I swear he'd
run around all the time with no underwear on if I
didn't keep after him."

I gave a quick "Yes Ma'am" and headed up the stairs
that led from our kitchen to the bedrooms upstairs.
The room at the top that I would go through was my
little sisters. She was probably in the living room
watching television since I didn't see her around.
>From there I proceeded in to a central hall that
branched off to the remaining rooms, four in all, plus
a bathroom and hall closet. I headed to the bathroom
first since I had to pee real bad for some reason. The
door was open as I rushed in, and my twin was there
combing his hair.

"Hey Jake, what's fer supper?" He said, soothing his
hair with his hand.

I had rushed to the toilet and, pulling the towel
aside, quickly began urinating. "I dunno, smells like
hot dogs and fries. I'm starving though."

"Well," Jimmy said, "I hope Aunt Rose brought her cole
slaw, it's the best." And headed out the door where I
heard him jumping down the stairs.

I finished what I was doing, headed for the sink and
started washing up like I'd been told. I turned as I
heard someone come in the bathroom and saw that it was
Benny, with some shorts and a tank top on. Like always
there was a grin on his face as he came up beside me
and playfully nudged me aside to work on his blonde
hair.

"Yer Mom said to tell you to make sure you put some
clean underwear on Benny. Didja?" I said, as I dried
my hands and turned to face him, looking up since he
was maybe six inches taller than I was.

"Nope," he said, turning to look at me and grin. "And
doncha tell either. Mom's always trying ta get me to
wear underwear but it's too cool to not wear any. You
should try it too." And with that he grabbed my towel
and yanked it off. So we horsed around just a minute
playfully wrestling, him grabbing my dick and
squeezing it, until I heard my Mother call up the
steps that supper was ready. Benny slapped my butt,
headed out of the bathroom and I ran naked to my room.
I dressed quickly, for once not putting on any
underwear, and discovering a new feeling of excitement
as the cloth of my cutoff shorts rubbed up against
butt and genitals.

And so dinner came and went, us boys getting the job
of cleaning up the dishes and tidying the kitchen. We
spent that late afternoon playing wiffle ball in our
large back yard. A couple of the neighborhood kids
joined in and it was regular fun. My Dad even found
time to join in for a little while after arriving home
from a long day at work.

Greg was there and talked my brother Willy into
spending the night at his house as they planned on
doing some early morning biking to another of their
friend's farm. There they'd spend the day earning a
little extra spending money helping out with the farm
chores. Jimmy headed off with our cousin Stanley for
the night. Both liked fishing and planned on getting
an early start on catching some of the stocked Rainbow
trout that was plentiful in the stream that ran
through the north side of town.

It wasn't long before the evening was spent and we
were being sent off to bed. We had each gotten our
baths earlier and was ready. But it was just Benny and
me that went to my room. We were both chatting about
nothing in particular, the ways boys will do. I don't
remember exactly about what, but I do remember we were
both kid of excited and not sleepy at all. We both
stripped down to our briefs and crawled into my bed.
He immediately started horsing around, playfully
wrestling with me and especially enjoyed tickling me,
which I loved. In the process of our rolling around he
would once again grab at my privates through my
briefs, giving them a squeeze but not hurting me. I
would do the same, the first time discovering that he
had a boner again, which I felt excited about, though
I didn't think about the why of it then.

The noise must have carried downstairs because my
Mother yelled up the steps for us to settle down and
quit making so much noise. So we did and ended up
lying close to each other, our warm bodies touching
head to toe.

It seemed like we had talked for quite a while, with
Benny telling me several of his ghost stories. He was
very imaginative and had a way of getting you to
believe every little bit of it. During that time we
heard the rest of the family heading for bed and soon
only the night noises drifted in to us through the
closed bedroom door. Outside the open window the night
was cool and calm, crickets singing their constant
love songs to each other and the occasional automobile
would drift up through town and past our house, on its
journey to other parts of the world.

"I'll tickle your back if you tickle mine." Benny said
at some point. It was something we had done before and
something I think everyone loved in my family. To this
day I love to have someone run their fingers lightly
up and down my back, gently sending pleasurable chills
up my spine. I think I have always been especially
good at being the giver as I could translate what I
was doing to what I would be experiencing if I was the
one receiving.

We would each spend about ten minutes on each other,
until your arm would give out from extending it out
over the others back. Benny had just finished doing my
back for the second time and plopped over on to his
back and said, "Okay, now do my belly."  I lay on my
side, leaning on my elbow, my head propped in my hand.
Benny's head was on the pillow, his hands behind his
head and his eyes closed. The soft light cast a warm
glow along the length of his youthful body and I just
lay there for a moment taking it all in. At that
moment I believe I had my experience at an early form
of lust for another as I had this strange emotion of
admiration come over me that I had not consciously
felt before.

My hand reached out and my fingers lightly traced a
trail down the center of his chest and when I reached
his smooth stomach I brought them around slowly around
to his left side and gently back up to his neckline.
Back down the center again and then up the opposite
side. The entire trip would only take a few seconds,
but I could feel the tingling of my fingertips on my
own body. His skin was soft, but with a boys youthful
firmness, still a hint of baby fat in his otherwise
sleek body.

As he lay there with his eyes closed, a smile of
pleasure across his handsome face I explored his body
with my eyes, especially his nipples and smooth belly.
I began to caress these areas gently running over his
nipples with the flat of my fingertip. It was
interesting to see that they had become hard and
pointy.  Each time I rubbed them a soft moan would
come from Benny and I started grinning to see this
happen, giving myself a feeling of pleasure that he
enjoyed this. It was a first of associating my giving
pleasure to someone with a feeling of pleasure for
myself. I still had no inkling of the sexual nature of
this but I believe I had some subconscious awareness
that I liked what I was doing.

As my eyes continued to look over his body it was easy
to notice that he had a woody going on in his
underwear, pushing the front of his underwear out an
inch or two. I kept tickling him, alternating between
his chest and nipples to his flat belly and tight
belly button. Meanwhile I studied his erection trying
to imagine what it looked like without the underwear
covering it.

"Whatcha lookin' at Jakey?" Whispered Benny.

I turned my head towards him and sheepishly said, "Oh
nothing." But I was grinning because I knew I had been
caught.

"I know what ya was looking at kid!" He said quietly
and reaching down with one hand pulled the front of
his underwear down exposing his erect penis, pointing
up towards his belly. "Whaddaya think of that, eh?!"
And he looked me in the face grinning proudly.

As he had pulled his underwear down a strong emotion
came over me and I caught my breath as I got a clear
view of what I had been wondering about. His penis was
probably only three inches long at that point in his
life, no more than and inch in diameter. He was
circumcised with the head being just a little larger
and darker. It wasn't as easy to make out but there
was just a hint of some soft, lightly colored pubic
hairs. His ball sac was loose, with one testicle
higher than the other was. As I watched I noticed the
higher one moving slowly down, like a slug was inside.
His dick jumped some and quivered causing us both to
giggle.

"Wow," I said slowly and turned my head to look at
him, "That's neat." My voice had a little hoarseness
to it and felt constricted some. I suppose it was the
result of some sort of passion. Benny just had a proud
look on his face and continued to grin.

"Hey Benny, can I ask ya something?" I whispered,
hesitating a little at what I was wanting to ask, but
not really caring. Benny made ya feel comfortable that
way.

"What Jake?" He said back, still holding his underwear
down, looking at his dick and then up at me.

Nodding my head towards his boner I asked, "Why does
yer dick git hard like that? Mine does it all the time
too. Does it have something to do with sleeping?
'cause mine's like that all the time when I sleep and
wake up." I looked at his boner and, grinning, looked
back at him.

Reaching down with his free hand he pulled the front
of my underwear out exposing my own little hardon.
Looking from it up to meet my eyes he grinned and
said, "I can see it's that way right now and you ain't
sleeping. And I'm not sleeping and you weren't
sleeping earlier today when we wuz in the basement. So
I don't think it has anything to do with sleeping. I'm
not sure why it does that. But I know its sure feels
good when it's like that."

 Looking back down to my dick he said, "You getting
any hair down there yet?" and rubbed his hand across
my dick to feel my balls and the area above my dick. I
gave a shudder as his hand brushed across the head of
my now exposed dickhead.
He gave a short quiet laugh and looking once again at
me said, "That feels good, doesn't it?"

"Oh wow, sure does!" I said as I nodded and grinned,
"Better'n tickling."

Benny let go of my underwear and his, rolled onto his
side facing me and propped his head in his hand
looking at me. "You ever play with yerself down there
Jakey?" He asked, raising his eyebrows with a look on
his face and a tone in his voice like he had some sort
of great news to tell.

Not really knowing what he was asking I answered
truthfully, "No I don't think so.  I like to rub it
against the bed sometimes when it gets like this. Why?
 Whaddaya mean?" It was like he had a secret, or what
my Mother liked to call, "Dirt" to tell and was dying
to get it out.

"Well," he said slowly, "If ya play with it just right
you will get this most intense feeling! It's like the
best thing ya ever did." And he raised his eyebrows
looking at me like he had just told me the secret of
the pyramids.

"Whaddaya mean, play with it just right? How do ya do
it? Have you done it?" And all these questions came
out because I knew this was something important and
something very secretive that he was laying on me. At
the same time I somehow was reminded of what Willy had
done the night before. Maybe that's what he was doing.
But I didn't say anything about what I had seen then.

"Sure, I done it. Done it a lot lately. It's great and
it's real easy to do. But, I don't think I can tell ya
how to do it. But, I can show ya if ya want." And
there was that grin again. And I loved it. I was
excited and my dick seemed to be pulsing.  "Ya do it
like this," and he rolled onto his back, reached down
and pulled his underwear down below his butt.

Then, looking over at me he said. "Tell ya what, if
I'm gonna do this you gotta do it too. And we both
gotta take our underwear off. You'll like it and it'll
feel better too. OK? And something else Jakey, " And
he looked at me with a very serious look on his face,
"Ya can't tell anyone. People will think yer weird and
git mad at ya and stuff. So, this is a big secret
between me and you. A cousin secret, OK?"

I said, "Sure, uh, OK. Cousin secret, me and you." And
I lay on my back to lift my butt and excitedly slide
my underwear down and off. I grabbed them and put them
under my pillow so I wouldn't lose them in the night.
I then lay back on my side with my head resting on my
hand, looking at him expectantly. Benny had watched me
lose the underwear and as I lay back down next to him,
surveyed my body from my chest down, his eyes resting
on my boner, staying there for a moment.
He looked up into my face and smiled this really nice
smile. I could feel genuine affection there and it
made me feel warm and excited. "You have a nice body
Jakey," he told me softly, "and your dick is pretty
too."

I just smiled, not really ever thinking of my dick as
being pretty. Interesting and maybe even fascinating
at times but never as pretty. It was more like a
finger or toe, but I was coming to realize there was a
little more to this thing between my legs than I had
ever realized.

I was feeling pretty comfortable with this situation
and feeling even closer to my cousin, a type of
affection I had not felt before. I was excited and
wanted to touch him, to feel him close to me. It was a
new feeling for me but I was innocent enough about
what was going on to enjoy the purity of the
situation.

I watched as he reached down and pulled his underwear
off, the whole time I kept my eyes glued to his dick.
As he lay back down I felt compelled to say to him,
"Benny, you have a pretty dick too. I really like the
way it looks. It's bigger than mine and you have
bigger balls too."

He looked at me, smiling, and said, "You can touch it
if you want. Tickle it like you tickled my nipples a
little bit ago." And he rolled slightly towards me,
his dick invitingly pointing at me.

I put my hand on the soft, firm skin of his flat belly
and let it slide down towards his pecker. It slid
alongside its length and, rolling my hand over on top
I let my fingertips lightly glide up the shaft and
over the head. His dick jumped at the contact and he
gave a little moan. I then got a little bolder and
actually grasped his dick in my small hand. It was
incredible as I could feel the warmth and firmness. It
felt so much bigger than my own. I gave it a slight
squeeze and letting go let my hand wander down to
where his balls were lying loose. I tickled them
lightly for a moment and then cupped them in my hand,
squeezing gently.

"It's called 'Jacking Off'," he said.

"What?" I asked, not sure what he meant.

"'Jacking off'. That's what it's called when ya play
with yerself. I've heard some kids say 'beating off'
and even 'slapping the meat' but I just call it
'jacking off'. Ya do it like this," and he reached
down and grabbed his dick to show me what he meant.

I watched intently as he grabbed his three-inch boner
in his right hand wrapping his fingers around it and
started stroking it up and down. The head would
disappear into his fist and then pop out as the skin
would fold up over the head. It was very fascinating
to me. He looked at me and gave me this goofy kind of
grin, still stroking slowly. He did this for just a
coupla moments and stopped.  Looking at me he said,
"You try it now."

I wasn't shy about it or even hesitant for some
reason. Maybe it was the excitement I felt or maybe I
didn't think at all, but I just reached over and
grabbed his dick like he had held it, feeling it warm
and pulsing. I started stroking it like he had and
heard him giggle. "I meant do yourself Jakey. But I
like what yer doing. Keep going 'cause that really
feels good. Mmmm, Maybe I can do you."  And with that
he reached down with his right hand, grabbing my dick.
It didn't seem to fit his fist just right as he tried
to stroke me, since I was smaller and he shifted his
hand so that his fingers were together and my dick was
in the center. It felt incredible as he began stroking
up and down my shaft. It was unlike anything I had
ever felt in my short life.

So we lay there for a few minutes, my thoughts going
between what I was doing to him and what he was doing
to me. I looked at his face and he had his head back
into the pillow, his eyes closed, an intense look of
satisfaction evident. He kept stroking me and I found
my hips moving to match the rhythm he had going. The
pleasure I was feeling seemed to be spreading across
my body, my breathing getting shallower, in short
gasps. I squeezed his dick eve tighter and sped up the
rhythm.

"Oh Jake, keep it up, I'm almost there." He said. I
wasn't sure what he meant by almost there but I could
feel that something was happening. He was squirming,
his hips began moving up and down to my rhythm and the
moans were more frequent. My own penis felt like it
was growing and that if something didn't happen soon
it would explode. I stroked Benny faster and he
stroked me faster and between the two of us we must
have been making some sort of racket, though neither
noticed.

And then it began, the first inkling that something
bigger was happening. And it was happening to both of
us at the same time. But it happened for Benny first.

"Oh Jakey, oh, oh, I, um, I'm gonna cum! I'm gonna,
uh, uh, ahhhhhhh!" and his dick began to pulsate, his
hips thrust into the air with his butt off the bed.
His head was turned on the pillow towards me and his
face was all squished up into the weirdest looking
expression. He was gasping taking short little
breaths. He had left go of my dick and his hand
grabbed my hand that was still stroking him furiously.
He took control of what I was doing slowing the rhythm
down until it had almost stopped, now just slowly
going up and down.

This continued for a full minute and then he stopped
completely, lying there quietly breathing slowly. As I
watched his face and then slowly looked down his belly
to his semi-hard cock I realized that this must be
what Willy had done the night before. This was jacking
off, and that's what Willy had been doing. I forgot
about my own dick for the moment.
I watched his dick, still grasped gently in my hand
could feel it hot and still lightly pulsing. His nuts
were lying together in the sac which seemed to be
fully relaxed now. I loved the smooth feel of his
penis and took my thumb and stroked below the slit
that ran on the tip of its head. His hand was on mine
and clasped it gently as his body shuddered again.
He gasped again and looking directly in my face with
his gentle eyes said, "Oh shit Jake, that was the best
I ever cum I think. That was great. Yer pretty good at
that. Man oh Man, thanks!"
"What happened Ben? What happened to yer dick? It
looked like you were having a conniption or sumpthin'
but I know it was better than that." His dick was
still in my hand and without realizing it I had begun
to gently stroke him again. It was so soft.
"Uh well," he began. "I just had something called an
orgasm. Ya can call it cumming too, tho I don't do
that yet. Ya get it when ya play with yer dick like we
were doing. That's called jacking off and only guys
can do it. There's more to it but it's confusing to
me. I know it has something to do with where babies
come from."

Then he rolled over towards me and grabbed my hand,
stopping what I was doing. "You didn't cum yet didja?"
He said with an expectant look on his face.

"No, I don't think so," I said, "It was feeling really
good, you playing with my dick like that, jacking me.
And it was really getting good 'til you stopped when
you did that organism thing"

"Heh, Orgasm Jake, and I'm sorry I stopped. When ya
have one ya tend ta forgit everything else that's
goin' on." And reaching down and over he once again
grabbed my still erect penis in his hand, the same way
he had before. "Now jus' lay back and you are about to
experience the best thing you ever felt."

I recall how softly he had said this last thing, and
that I felt so comfortable, yet excited about that
moment. I reluctantly let go of his dick, which seemed
to be getting hard again. He was lying on his side
now, his head cradled in his hand, propped up on his
elbow. I looked into his beautiful face and felt
something akin to love. I really felt something
special for him at that moment, an older boy like him
caring for me, and trusted him completely. He was
smiling and raised his eyebrows silently saying,
"Watch this," letting go of my pecker and running his
fingers lightly over my chest, playfully running over
my nipples. He continued exploring my body with his
fingertips, traveling across my chest, down past my
quivering boner and along my thighs, coming back up
along the inside of them and feather-light tickling my
balls as he passed over them and cam back up to my
belly and chest.

I was totally relaxed, and had closed my eyes,
enjoying the new sensations. I put my arms behind my
head and Ben ran his fingers up each one of them
lightly caressing the soft skin of my young arms. I
was enjoying it so much and my pecker felt pleasurably
hard, like it would explode. I could feel the cool
night breeze from the window as it lightly coursed my
young body. I could smell the breezes from the street
outside along with the boyish smell of my young
cousin. His warm breath was brushing my cheek and I
felt him close. I slowly opened my eyes and saw that
his face was close to mine. He was smiling an easy
smile and I looked into his beautiful eyes and felt so
close to him. I don't know why but I lifted my head
just a little and kissed him softly on his lips, then
lay my head back down on the pillow, surprised at what
I had just done. It had seemed such a natural thing to
do. I was actually taken aback somewhat for just a
moment, until I saw him smile, a warm, knowing smile.

As he smiled he paused a moment in his caressing of me
and gently said, "Why'd ya do that Jakey?"

"I dunno Ben. I, jus' wanted to, I guess." I said.  "I
jus' felt like doin' it. Yer not mad or anything are
ya?" And I just had the slightest bit of panic in my
voice.

He looked me in the eyes, still smiling that gentle
smile, lowered his eyes and let them travel down my
body to where his hand had come to rest on my erect
penis. He gave it a little squeeze to which I moaned,
then brought his eyes back to looking into mine.

"I'm glad you did Jake. I liked it. I dunno why. Some
people say that guys aren't supposed to like guys like
that. But I do. And I like you. And I like that you
kissed me. And, and I'd like to kiss you too." He was
still holding my dick and had begun once again
stroking it the way he had before. He brought his face
a little closer to mine and said, "Can I?"

In answer I brought my hand behind his head and
brought his face close to mine. My eyes were still
open, but I could see that he had closed his. He then
kissed me and a feeling like an electric shock went
through my body. His lips were soft and warm, yet firm
as I felt them manipulate against my own. I could
taste him also, a salty taste that had its own appeal.
I had never kissed anyone besides my mother and never
on the lips. I'd seen people do it in my family and
even in the movies.  I don't remember Opey Taylor ever
doing it though. What I was doing now seemed so
natural and innocent. I was enjoying each moment.
Benny continued to slowly stroke me and I could once
again feel that something was beginning to happen to
me. Not just in my privates but over my entire body.
It seemed like I was just one entire pleasure capsule.
Every bit of my body seemed to be screaming with
pleasure.

Benny pulled back far enough to ask, "Ya like that
Jakey?", still that smile, still stroking me.

"Oh man, yes Benny! I really like it. I didn't know ya
could do something like this. My dick feels like it's
going to explode! Does that mean I'm having an
organism?" I said hoarsely.

He giggled and touched my nose with his, squeezing my
dick gently. "It's an orgasm you silly dork. And you
haven't had it yet. But you'll know when it happens
because it'll be the most beautiful feeling you ever
had."

He stopped stroking me and run his hand up to my chest
to play with my nipples again. "We're going to take
you there now. I'm going to do something for you that
you will really like, Better'n what I been doing so
far. But, ya can't tell anyone. It's gotta be our
secret. There's some people that don't think it's
right to do this, but I think it's a great thing,
don't you?"

Not sure what he meant, but trusting him completely I
said, "Sure Ben, what ever you say. I won't tell no
one 'cause I think it's great too."

"Okay lil buddy, jus' close yer eyes and relax and you
are about to experience the best thing since home
delivery pizza." And as I closed my eyes he had come
close to once again kiss me on the lips.

He was very gentle, lovingly so. He stayed for a
moment, there on my lips.  I felt his tongue pushing
at my lips and easily gave in to it, allowing it to
part my lips and enter my mouth. It went in only a
little ways and I found myself sucking on it, enjoying
the rough texture as he flicked it across my own
tongue.  It was so exciting and what I know now as
sensual. There was a naturalness to it that just
seemed to fall in to place, and I truly enjoyed each
moment.

His lips left mine and he continued down the nape of
my neck to my chest, leaving kisses as he went. His
left hand had once again found my penis and just
squeezed it and my testicles occasionally rubbing the
head between his fingers. My pecker felt incredible!
His lips found my nipples and he spent a few moments
on each one, even nibbling at them lightly. His kisses
then found their way down to my navel, where he
stopped long enough to run his tongue around its
perimeter then forcing it into the small cavity there.
I could feel soft breezes cooling the moisture left by
his kisses.

By now my pecker felt ready to explode. I needed
something to happen but didn't know what. It was all
so new and unexplained to me. My entire body was alive
with a pleasurable sensation, from the tingling of my
toes and the chilly bumps on my legs to my eyes
rolling back in my head.  I didn't think it could get
any better and I was keenly aware of every little
thing that Benny was doing to me.

He stopped licking my navel and paused what he was
doing. I opened my eyes a little and lifted my head
slightly to watch what he would do next, wanting
desperately for him to continue kissing and touching
me. He was studying my penis, his face mere inches
from where my little guy was pointing at him. I could
see the head of my dick clearly, the skin having
rolled back as my dick had grown that night.

Benny looked up at me and smiled, then turned back
towards my dick and blew ever so softly on it. It sent
a chill up my body and caused my dick to quiver. He
then did something I never expected or had even
thought about; he kissed it. Just a little kiss, right
on the tip. Incredibly I think my dick got even harder
and bigger and another chill ran its course up my
young body. A moan escaped me as I watched dumbfounded
by what he had just done. He'd put his lips on my
dick! You weren't supposed to do that, were ya? But it
felt good, and I found that I wanted him to do it
again. I lifted my hips slightly to where my dick once
again was at his lips, and he kissed it once again. As
I lay back down his mouth followed and with his tongue
he circled the head several times. It was fantastic! I
just couldn't believe the feeling I was experiencing.
It was so intense. I wanted more!

Then he did something totally unexpected; he sucked my
dick right into his mouth. To this day I vividly
recall that image of my pecker disappearing into his
mouth, his blonde hair hanging loosely from his head,
his left hand on my belly, his right cupping my balls.
His warm mouth enveloped my dick his tongue still
licking at its shaft. I shoved my head back into the
pillow and was lost in the fantastic sensation that
ran through my body. I don't believe I was able to
even think at that moment.

I don't really recall how long I was like that. Maybe
it was only a minute, or maybe it was a bit longer. I
don't think it was too long though that I could feel
that incredible feeling building up to its climax that
we are all so familiar with.  My entire body seemed to
be on fire with passion with its center being in the
head of my pecker. With each stroke that Benny's mouth
made I could feel my balls tightening and my breath
get shallower, my hips beginning to thrust into his
mouth more urgently.

And then I was there. I was climaxing, lights
exploding in my head, gasping and moaning as each
spasm came over me. I had placed my hand on the back
of Ben's head and was pushing his face into my crotch,
grinding it into his lips as he continued sucking on
me and running his tongue up and down my shaft. It
seemed to go on forever. I don't think I was able to
breathe for a full minute.

As the intensity of it subsided my dick became more
sensitive and I was able to slow his ministrations
down by the pressure of my hand on his head. My eyes
were still closed and my head thrust back into my
pillow, my dick had become incredibly rigid during the
peak of this, my first climax. I slowly began to
relax, my body easing into a total state of release.
Ben slowed what he was doing, now just gently sucking
and licking at my penis, not seeming to want to stop.
He sucked on it a couple more times, almost milking it
with his soft mouth, allowing it to pop out of his
mouth at the end of each stroke. He then kissed the
tip and giving it a final lick looked up at me, a
smile playing across his impish face.

"Well, how was that Jakey?" He simply said, with a
knowing smile.

All I could manage was "Oh Man!", closed my eyes
briefly and then opening them again looked at him and
smiled. "Wow!"

 He gave a slight chuckle and laid his head on my flat
belly, looking up at me. "Is that something or what?!
I love it. It's the best thing I ever got to do. I
like to do it all the time. I do it probably five or
six times a day now."

I put my hand on his head, feeling his soft hair in my
fingers. "I never knew anything could feel like that
Ben. It was good with your hand, but when you did that
with your mouth it was so good. Where'd you learn to
do something like that?"
He lifted his head from my belly and shifted so that
he once again lay beside me on his side, his head
resting in his hand, his elbow propped on his pillow.
"I learned jus' last month. Ya know Jordy, the kid
across the hollow from where I live?" I nodded
remembering the brown hair boy who we'd played with
the last time I had been at Benny's house. He'd been
real nice to me and had even let me play pool in his
basement. His family also had a swimming pool and I
remembered now how we had had to change into our
swimming suits there beside the pool table.

"Well," he continued, "I stayed over at Jordy's house
a few weeks ago and he showed me some magazines his
dad had with pictures of naked girls in em. It made me
hard and Jordy had noticed. He then tol' me about
beating off and showed me how to do it. One of the
pictures showed this girl sucking on this guys cock,
uh, that's what they call it too, and Jordy was saying
he wondered what that felt like. I tol' him I wondered
what it had felt like too. And he said if I would suck
on his he would suck on mine. Since I kinda liked that
idea and wanted to feel what it was like I tol him
OK."

"And you did it to him then?" I whispered.

"Yea. I was like, freaking out sorta. We were in his
poolroom and he said I had to do him first. I didn't
care. I kinda liked the idea of putting his dick in my
mouth. I dunno why, but I did. I was real nervous and
my hands were sweaty. I asked him how I should do it.
So he had pulled his shorts and underwear off and
hopped up onto his pool table. You remember where his
pool table is doncha?"

Yea, I nodded, remembering the small room where we had
played a few games last summer.

"Well, he was up on that pool table and he jus' kinda
leaned back onto his hands and tol me to just put it
in my mouth like the girl did in the pictures and
pretend it was a lollipop." Benny looked away, smiling
as he remembered the site of that boy waiting for his
first blowjob.

"His dick's bigger than yours or mine, but not much.
And he has more hair and his balls are a lot bigger,
twice as big as mine." Benny looked back at me and
smiled. I had glanced down at his dick and saw that it
was hard again. I reached down and grabbed it once
again in my hand. He smiled approvingly. "I like that.
" he said.

"So Jordy looked at me and said 'Go ahead, I won't
tell anyone', which I had never even thought about.
But, I didn't think he'd tell anyone anyways. We're
pretty tight buds and have been friends for I think
forever. I wasn't sure how exactly to do it, so I just
did what Jordy had said and grabbing his dick I put it
in my mouth and just started sucking on it. And ya
know what?"

 I said, "What?" urging him on.

"I liked it." He continued, "I liked it a lot. Just
like I liked sucking on your dick. I liked the taste,
I liked the feeling of the soft skin on your dick and
I like the way you enjoyed it." And looking at me with
some concern in his eyes he said, "Do you think
there's anything wrong with me for doing this Jakey?
Some people would say I'm queer, but I like it a lot."
And for a moment I had a sense of panic in voice.

"Well," I said, "I don't know what queer is, but I
don't think there's anything wrong with it if ya liked
it a lot and no one got hurt. I'm not hurt, and I
liked it.  And Jordy asked ya to do it and he probably
liked it too. Like they say on TV, if it feels good do
it. This is what they must have had in mind when they
made that up."

Ben smiled at me, and made me feel all warm inside. I
squeezed his dick lightly and began gently stroking
it. "Ooooh, that's good." He said as he closed his
eyes and enjoyed it for a moment.

"So tell me some more," I said when he had once again
opened his eyes. "What did you and Jordy do then?"

"Well, thanks for what you said about sucking dicks. I
kinda feel the same way. I guess I just want to hear
someone else say it. You're a pretty fart smeller, I
mean smart feller. And being queer is what they call
someone who likes someone of the same sex, like a guy
liking a guy or a girl liking a girl. It's not a very
nice thing to call someone I guess. Something else
they call em is a homo, but I'm not sure exactly what
that means either." And he gave me that matter-of-fact
look.
"Well, once I started sucking on Jordy's dick I found
I didn't want to stop. It was just something I really
seemed to like. And Jordy had lain down on the pool
table so I was jus' basically right over top of his
dick, sucking away. I think I'm a natural at it 'cause
everything I did he seemed to like, moaning and
twisting his hips around. I must've been sucking on
his dick for ten minutes and my mouth was getting
tired and my throat was sorta crampy. But ya know what
he did then?" He asked. I stopped stroking him for a
second and said, "No, what?"

"His cock got bigger in my mouth like yours did when
you climaxed, but when he had his orgasm his dick spit
out stuff that's called cum."

I looked at him and squirmed up my face like I wasn't
sure to believe him. He saw the look on my face and
went on, "Yea, it jus' started coming out and before I
knew it I was swallowing it and sucking even harder on
his dick. And it really tasted neat. It seemed like
the thing to do."

He was quiet for a minute and I looked at his face. He
had closed his eyes and was enjoying what I was doing,
stroking him slowly like he had shown me. His hard
dick felt good in my hand. I stopped and squeezed it
gently. "So, did he suck you back?" I asked.

He grinned at my playfulness, reached down and grabbed
my now hard pecker and gave it a little squeeze.
"Well, he tried, but he kept gagging. He said he was
sorry but he didn't really like the taste. He did jack
me off a coupla times since, but only if I suck him
first like I did. I've probably sucked him a dozen
times or so since then. I don't care. Like I said, I
really like it. I liked sucking you. Jordy called it a
blowjob. You taste good, but you don't cum. But
neither do I. I think ya haveta be a little older
before that happens. His dick's bigger too, about five
inches I think. It's bigger than mine and I have four
inches. I measured it one day. You probably have about
three inches. I like that size. It's easy to get in my
mouth."

"Why is there this cum stuff? Where's it come from?" I
asked.

Benny reached down and grabbed my balls gently. "Well,
what Jordy said was that there's cum in your balls and
it comes out when ya get older. I think that's why
they call it cum. And it's got something to do with
making babies, but I don't know exactly what. I think
your balls will haveta be bigger before that happens.
Sometimes there is some clear stuff that comes outta
my dick and Jordy said it won't be long before I am
cumming too."

I looked down to where I was stroking his dick and
thought about what he had done for me earlier. It was
something I would never forget. My first orgasm and it
was a blowjob from my cousin, who I really admired. I
never felt closer to him than I did at that moment.
And I had an impish little idea.

"So, Jordy never gave you a good blowjob? Have you
ever did this with anyone else?" I asked.

"Well, besides that time he put it in his mouth and
gagged, it was the only time he tried. And I never had
an orgasm then. And I've never tried it with anyone
else but you.  But like I said, I probably beat off
five or six times a day. I just do it all the time
now. I did it this morning before we left and again at
a restaurant we stopped at."

"In the restaurant?!" I said, unbelieving.

"No you Dork," he laughed, "In the bathroom. There was
some guy in there who was checking me out when I went
in, so I went in a stall, and well, one thing led to
another and I ended up beating off. I can do it in
like two minutes if I want. And when I came out that
same guy was there grinning at me. I think he knew
what I had been doing. He said 'Next time I can help
ya with that lil buddy', and I just got outta there."

"Well," I said, "it looks like yer ready to go again
it seems." And looking down at his dick I gave it a
squeeze. "Why don't ya lay back and let me take care
of this Benny? I think I owe ya one now."

He looked at me and slowly laid on his back, grinning
at me expectantly. "Whatcha gonna do Jakey?" He said
and touched my cheek with the back of his hand.

"Whatever you want me to Benny, whatever you want."
And looking at him I just smiled. He looked very
handsome and I felt a genuine love for him, closer
than I had ever felt for another boy, even my
brothers. He put his hands behind his head on the
pillow and crossed his ankles, his entire body glowing
in the soft light of the evening. My eyes scanned the
length of his naked body, from his beautifully soft
blonde Beatle haircut and lean face, across the
outline of his smooth and youthfully muscular chest
and stomach. My eyes rested on his penis, standing at
attention with its well-defined head, four inches of
delicate beauty that caused the butterflies in my
stomach to twirl. His nut sac lay cradled between his
legs with one nut higher than the other.

I had never looked at someone else naked with such
interest before. The beauty of a bare body had never
been displayed before me with the appearance of a
visual feast. I wanted to touch and to explore, to
fondle and caress. And I wanted to love this cousin of
mine the way he had loved me. Somehow, instinctively,
I knew what to do and what I wanted to do.

Following the example of what Benny had done for me, I
leaned over his face and gently kissed him on his soft
lips. He responded by kissing back. I pulled back
slightly and said, "Benny, I think I love you. Is that
OK?"

"Sure it is. I think it's OK for someone to love
another. Even if we're guys and especially if we're
cousins." He said reaching up and placing his hand
gently behind my head he brought my face to his and
kissed me softly. We did that for a moment, his tongue
searching out mine, sucking on it like it was a
miniature penis. I tasted his spit and found I liked
it, excited by its flavor.

My hand was rubbing his chest where I found his
nipples were hard. I broke our kiss and located his
left nipple with my hot mouth. I sucked on it for a
little while, using my tongue to flick and tease it.
Moving to his right breast I did the same, a moan
escaping Benny's lips as I tried nibbling. I had made
a new little discovery.

I knew what I wanted to do and was anxious to get
there. So, after just a couple minutes on his nipples
I continued my journey south along the Benny highway
across his deliciously flat belly stopping to kiss his
belly button. As I licked the small crevice and ran my
tongue inside I could see the head of his beautiful
cock only inches from my face. I slowly stopped what I
was doing and raising my face I was able to clearly
see the object of my mission. I just lay there for a
short moment, studying, admiring each little curve and
vein. I was close enough that I could smell its unique
aroma, somewhat like my own smell, yet its own.

I looked up at Benny, who was still lying back with
his hands under his head. He was watching me, smiling
expectantly. "Go ahead," he said, "Please."

I just smiled at him, knowing he didn't need to say
please. I shifted my body closer to where my face was
now positioned directly above his dick, my own chest
lying on his belly, almost upside down to him. I was
lying on my belly and part of my legs were off the
edge of the bed, my own erection digging into the bed.


I took his hard penis in my right hand and without
hesitating leaned down and kissed the tip of it. I was
a little surprised at the taste, not sweet like I had
imagined a moment ago but kinda salty and tangy. I
licked my lips and then let them slide slowly over the
head and on down until I had the whole shaft in my
mouth, filling it but not so that I was gagging.

Somehow instinctively I knew to watch my teeth. I
could feel the rim of his head against my tongue. It
was fantastic and I found I was loving it from the
first second I had it in my mouth. I heard Benny gasp
and his hand came down where he put it on the back of
my head, encouraging me on. I couldn't see his face
from how I was positioned but I could imagine him
lying there with his eyes scrunched up, as I had done.

I remembered what he'd said Jordy'd told him about
pretending it was a sucker.  As I pulled back sucking
on the shaft I could feel his cock pulse and the head
fill my mouth. I used my tongue to run around the rim
a couple times and then plunged down again to where my
lips were at the base and my nose was touching his
ball sac. It smelled so good and I lingered there a
moment as the musty odor filled my nostrils. With his
hips thrusting gently and encouraging me onwards I
started a slow rhythm up and down his shaft, turning
my head as I did so and using my tongue to lick the
head as I rose about it. His hand was pressing me
onwards rubbing it through my hair, the fingers
digging in as I used my tongue.

This went on for a long time it seemed, maybe ten
minutes. I was giving my first blowjob, and I wasn't
giving to much thought about the significance of what
I was doing. I guess because it just didn't seem to be
significant in that I was having sex with my male
cousin. To me I was just doing something that seemed
natural and pleasurable. And I was really enjoying it,
enjoying what I was doing for Benny and enjoying how
it made me feel. To me it wasn't disgusting or
anything, I don't think I even gave that aspect of it
a thought.

I do remember thinking, "Wow, I'm sucking a cock! I'm
really sucking someone's cock. And I love it. I really
love it!" And the enjoyment of it just made me press
on harder, more intensely, wanting to give him
pleasure and in turn pleasuring myself.

Benny's breathing became a little more ragged now and
both his hands were now pushing my face down onto his
pulsating dick. His hips were gyrating and thrusting
as I sucked harder on it. I grabbed his dick in my
right hand and with it close to my lips let it slide
up and down the shaft, getting even more of a reaction
from him.

His right hand had up my back and was rubbing over my
bum, from cheek to cheek. My legs were spreading and
my hard dick was rubbing the bed, my hips pushing me
up and down the bed just a little. One of his fingers
found the crack of my butt and ran along it, brushing
over my hole. I shuddered and involuntarily raised my
butt towards his hand. Once again his finger went over
my hole, but then came back again, as if it had found
something worth exploring. He continued to do that,
just pushing his finger at my hole, never really into
it. It was another new feeling.

But now I could tell he was ready to go, his stomach
muscles had tightened and his knees had come up. The
thrusting of his hips pushing his hard cock into my
mouthed became frenzied. Without any further
encouragement his rear end came up off the bed and
grabbing hold of my head with both hands, he began his
climax, shoving his jerking cock deeper into my mouth
and pressing my face further inward until I could
barely breath. His cock was throbbing in my mouth and
with each jerk he would give a muffled moan. I knew
enough to take it easy and slowed down the sucking and
licked the back of his cockhead with my tongue, which
caused his hands to take new control of my head. And I
sucked even harder, my jaws and cheeks aching. He
slowly began relaxing as his climax subsided, but I
continued to gently suck at his now softening dick,
enjoying the sensation and knowing that he also would
enjoy it. I did this for a long time, maybe five
minutes, gently kissing and suckling until he was
completely soft and his breathing had returned to
normal. His hands now just softly rubbed my head, his
fingers absently playing with my hair.

He put his hand on my shoulder and pulled me gently
towards him and my mouth reluctantly let go of its
prize. He was smiling as I moved to lie beside him. We
both lay on our sides facing each other, a sheepish
grin on our faces. He reached over and brushed a
strand of hair that had fallen in my face, his fingers
then brushing my cheek.

"Thanks Jake, that was the best thing anyone has ever
done for me. You really seemed to know what you were
doing down there." And he nodded with his eyes towards
where I had just pleasured him. He ran his hand down
my side and let it rest on my butt, softly tickling it
with his fingertips. I had a feeling of great joy and
pride that I had been able to do something like this
for my cousin. And it was so exciting and fun to do.
Wow, why hadn't I figured this out before?! All I
could do was lay there and smile, feeling good about
myself, loving Benny, contented with life for the
moment.

"Whew! You were really great Jakey! I mean, I can't
believe how good that felt. Thanks so much. I think I
owe ya back now." His hand had found my still erect
penis, which I had almost forgotten about. He started
stroking it like he had before and I was almost
immediately lost in the sensation of it. I opened my
eyes and saw him staring into my face, amused by what
he saw there. He smiled and continued what he was
doing. My hand found his hip and I reached far enough
that I could cup my hand around his firm bum. It gave
me purchase as I thrust my hips in and out of his hand
as it clenched tighter to my dick.

It didn't take long and I was once again going over
the top, experiencing the second orgasm of my life,
totally lost in the intensity of it. I must have moan
a little too loudly because Benny put his hand over my
mouth, telling me to ssssh. I don't know, I was
completely consumed by what was happening in the end
of my dick and to the spasms that was taking over my
body.

The feeling slowly subsided and once again I was able
to breath, opening my eyes to see Benny smiling,
obviously having enjoyed what he had just done for me.
Giving my dick one last squeeze he brought his hand up
and placing both his hands together lay on them and on
his pillow. He gave a cute little yawn, then smiled
some more.  "Pretty good, huh?" He quietly asked.

"Benny, that was so wild! How come I haven't known
about this before?" I whispered, placing my head on my
hands like he had.

"I dunno Jake. I guess it's just something everyone
figgers out sooner or later. Or someone shows ya, Like
Jordy showed me, and like I showed you. But I don't
think everyone does the sucking thing though. Just the
people that like to do it. And not many guys want to
do it with other guys. They'll do it their self, the
jacking off thing, or there's something ya can do with
a girl, but I don't know much about that yet. And I
think ya can get in big trouble for it too. Gurls are
nothin' but trouble."

He yawned, closed his eyes for a minute, and opening
them back up said, "I'm tired now Jake. I think I
better get to sleep. Maybe we can talk some more
tomorrow. And we better put our underwear back on in
case someone comes in here in the morning. They'd
probably think it was weird if two boys were sleeping
naked together."

He found his underwear where he'd slipped them off and
started putting them on, then stopped and took them
back off again. Holding them clenched in his hand and
holding them up towards me he said, "Hey Jakey. Can we
swap underwear? I'll wear yours and you wear mine. And
I'd like to keep them as a souvenir of tonight,
something to remember it by." He looked at me
expectantly.

"Yea, neat idea Ben. I like that. Yea, souvenir. That
would be neat." And handed him my Fruits. I found out
later when I examined his briefs that they were Fruits
also. I still have them to this day, stuffed in the
back of my own underwear drawer. I never washed them
and never wore them beyond that evening. Occasionally
I'll remember them and, getting them out will smell
them, to see if there is any odor left from that night
and from Benny's boy parts. It's probably my
imagination but I think I can still smell what his
dick smelled like that night so long ago. And I'll
always remember the taste. It was a souvenir,
priceless to me, a reminder of where it all started
for me those thirty-five odd years ago.
We both put 'our' underwear on and lay down, snuggling
closer, facing each other, just our knees touching
now. Benny was looking in my eyes, and I was doing the
same. I loved him at that moment, though I didn't
actually realize it. It was just the feeling of being
liked by an older boy. You might say I almost
worshipped him then. And it would be the same with
other boys I would come to know through the years.

"Ya okay Jakey? You alright with what we did tonight?"
He asked, a slight look of concern on his face.

I didn't hesitate, "Yea Ben, I'm okay. What we did was
great! Really! I think it was the best thing I ever
did. And I really liked what I did to you. You know,
down there," I sheepishly said, nodding my head
towards his waist.

He smiled and put his hand on y shoulder, giving it a
little squeeze, "I'm glad Jake. You were pretty good.
I like what ya did and hope you'll do it again
sometime. But, ya gotta remember now, ya can't tell
anyone about this. I mean it, there are kids out there
that will tease the heck outta ya if they knew we did
this. They don't understand and don't like the idea of
to guys doin' stuff like that together. Okay?"

I knew what he meant. I knew about teasing. I knew
very well. I was generally the kid that got picked on
at school, and teased, and tormented. I understood all
too well. "Sure Ben, I won't tell no one. I know what
that's like."

"Thanks Buddy," He said. "G'nite. And thanks again for
what you did. You're a pretty special guy." His eyes
were closing into sleep as he said that. I was full of
pride and love for him right then. He'd called me his
buddy and said that I was pretty special. Ya can't
beat that, no sirree!

I lay there for a long time, looking into his sleeping
face thinking about what had just happened, about what
led up to it and how my first orgasm had felt. I could
feel my little dick throb and begin to harden once
again. I thought about giving my first blowjob and how
my cousin had tasted. I recalled what Willy had been
doing the night before and now knew exactly what it
was he had been doing. I came to realize that what had
been on his sock must have been cum. So he was
cumming? I wonder how long he had been jerking off and
I wondered if he had ever gotten, or given, a blowjob.
 Somehow I knew that wasn't something he would do and
further understood why you would keep things like this
secret. It was some of his buddies that enjoyed
teasing and tormenting me, though Willy usually stuck
up for me.

I was drifting off to sleep and the last thing I
remember was leaning over and kissing my cousin on the
forehead. I then reached down and through his
underwear, (my underwear), I gently grabbed his dick.
And I slept.

The day that year that my cousin came to visit us
started off normal enough for me. I was just a little
kid, naïve about the goings on of the world, only
existing in my own little part of it. I played ball,
did my chores, ran around with other neighborhood
kids, ate my Mom's homemade bread and knew when my
Daddy would come home, the smell of the strip mines on
him.

Benny changed that for me. He introduced me to sex in
an innocent enough way, and I was a willing and eager
participant. It was something that has been passed
down over these many years, from boy to boy. And so it
was that day for me. He had introduced me to an
incredible pleasure that was part of our humanity, of
our existence. I can't and wouldn't say that Benny had
molested me. I was as much an instigator as a partner.
 We were both so young, so much a product of the times
and of our family environment.  But I also feel that
if it hadn't been our inherent desire to do what we
did, neither of us would have permitted it to go any
further. We both wanted it, and we both enjoyed what
we did. Not just this time, but many times to come.
Yes, there's a lot more to this story.