Date: Tue, 15 Aug 2000 14:54:03 GMT
From: josie fish <yellowfish_suck@hotmail.com>
Subject: Jeremy and Jackson

His hot, sexy breath warmed my face as i leaned against the bathroom door,
with him looking at me with those intense blue eyes of his.

God, he's beautiful! I thought for my self.

He's about 6 feet tall and i guess weigh about 130 pounds. He has light
blond hair, the same hair style that Taylor Hanson has today and light blue
eyes that would make me do "ANYTHING" for him.

I was so lost in his eyes that i hardly didn't noticed him brushing away
some lose brown stripes of hair that had fallen down to my eyes.

There, now i can see those lovely emerald eyes of yours. He said warmly,
with a smile on his face.

I blushed and smiled nervously but then his expression turned to something
different, to something more serious. He tilted his head to the left and
pressed my slender body against the door, hard enough to make me yelp.His
hands were planted firmly on my shoulders and i could feel his mint breath
as he leaned in closer. His red moist lips meet mine with the softest and
most innocent touch. Our mouth were barely open and only small smacks could
be heard. I felt his hands travel down my spine slowly and he left them on
the small of my back for a while before he traveled down to my butt which he
squeezed gently.

I was soooo insecure of my self, i didn't really know what to do with my
hands, so i just lingered them in his soft blond hair.

He moaned silently before breaking our first kiss.

I just stood there completely lost in our kiss that we had chared, i
couldn't belive that i just had kissed a BOY!

I was hoping that this would happen. He whispered softly to me, while
caressing my chest. I've been in love with you for quite some time but i
didn't think that you were gay.

GAY! That word just started to echo through my head the minute he said it. I
started panicking, i couldn't breath, the walls were closing in on me and
obviously he saw that something was wrong cause he asked me to sit down.

I just ran away!


Keep on going Jackson! I told my self silently as i walked the long way home
from school. My face was completely numb by the cold air that always seemed
to blow through Dublin. I put my read fingers in my jeans pockets and just
tried to focus on my black winter boots. each step was  one step close to
home. I couldn't take the school bus today, not with "HIM" being there. I
just didn't know how to think or how to feel. I mean you're suppose to know
but i didn't know and know i kinda knew and that scared the hell out of me.

Finally! I thought as i stood by the gate to our appartment. I looked up to
the 4:th floor and i could see that the light in the kithen was on, so i
knew that my mum most be home.

Oh my GOD!!!!!!!!!!! What, what would my mum think OR my kid brother that
see me both as his father and brother???

Fuck, this can't be happening, it was just a misstake, i'am not gay, i'am
not gay,i,am, NOT, gay......

I took a deep breath , before i opened the gate, my foot steps echoed as i
walked up all the twenty steps before reaching the door.

Hi mum! I yelled as i entered the door. There was no reply.

Maybe she is down at the basement. i mumbled to my self as i pulled my
hands through my brown hair. I kicked off my boots and threw my black
leader jacket on the white bureau. I went in to the kitchen to get a glas
of milk and then headed to my room.

Jeremy!!! I said in shocked voice.


Well this is the first chapter of my story. All comments are welcome good
as bad!

Take care!
Josie

yellowfish_suck@hotmail.com