Date: Sat, 10 Jun 2000 12:30:35 -0700 (PDT)
From: Bill <bil47@yahoo.com>
Subject: Joey and Bill - Dueling Journals
Joey and Bill: Dueling Journals
NOTE: This is the third part of the story of Joey and Bill.
Readers on ASSGM may be a bit confused by the different titles,
but readers on Nifty Archive will note that it is part of the
renamed folder entitled "Joey and Bill".
As I noted in the previous part ("Joey's Journal"), I have
created a site containing pictures of boys who resemble the images
I had in mind when I wrote my stories. Often, they resemble real boys
who were my contemporaries long years ago. The site is
http://photos.yahoo.com/bil47photo
You'll see that I have now added a number of miscellaneous pictures
as well. (All pictures are tame and 100% legal, but all are of boys who
are quite cute and/or beautiful.)
If you wish to find my older stories, they are on Nifty's "prolific
net author" link - http://www.nifty.org/nifty/authors.html under "Bill".
On ASSGM, do an author search for "bil47".
As always, I very much appreciate feedback and constructive criticism
on stories... and I guess on my selection of pictures to. (For instance,
it would be fun to hear if you had a vastly different image of a
particular character.)
And now, back to the story.
BILL' JOURNAL, Sunday morning, September 10, 1966
Damn! I'll never get Joey out of my mind... or my heart! I actually
cried last night, feeling incredibly sorry for myself. (I'm such a
fucking wimp!) Joey had one his school friends over yesterday, and
he spent the night at Joey's house. As I lay in bed last night with
my hard cock in my hand, I had all these thoughts of Joey floating
in my brain... the feelings of love... of lust... of loneliness... of
jealousy for that cute kid with short hair who was spending the night...
it all just welled up inside me. The tears started flowing down my
cheeks even as I was jacking myself off! I felt the sorrow like an
aching pain in my chest. Is this what they mean when they talk
about a "broken heart"? It sure felt like it!
It's better this morning, even though I was just watching Joey and the
short-haired kid out my bedroom window.
God! They look cute together! The way they discretely touched
each other on the arm or shoulder, and smiled at each other as
they talked... I'd bet anything they had
sex together last night.
I want to talk to Joey so bad, to have him smile at me again, to touch
him, and (yes, I admit) to suck his perfect boy-cock. I've made my dick
sore this past week jacking off time-after-time to thoughts of the only
person I've ever loved.
But now my mind also keeps going back to what I told Joey the
day-before-yesterday, when I finally got up the nerve to talk to him
after that fiasco of the week before. I told him, essentially, that I'd be
his slut anytime he wanted... and he maneuvered me into saying I'd
do the same for his two friends! When I got home, all I could think
about was the prospect of having sex with all three of them at once -
Joey, the short-haired kid (who I think is named Mike), and the bigger
kid with shaggy brown hair (who I'm pretty sure is Justin). The more
I thought about it, the more turned on I got. It fit perfectly with those
fantasies that used to fill my jack-off sessions... at least until Joey
came into my life. The fantasies had usually featured boys in my
class at school or older high school boys... the handsome jocks who
don't even know that nerds like me exist. I would imagine a group
of them - like members of the football team wearing just jockstraps -
pulling me into the their locker room and stripping me nude and
making me satisfy their lust. And I would be forced to kneel on the
floor before one of them, to pull down his sweaty jock, and suck him off
as he thrust his big teenage cock into my mouth. And maybe some of
them would gang-fuck my ass while I was blowing their team mates.
Shit! The thoughts of that kind of action produced an incredibly
powerful cum every time!
But since that glorious moment last month when I first taught Joey
about sex... when the spiritual love I was feeling for my 12-year-old
neighbor suddenly became a physical, sexual, orgasmic love... ever
since that moment, the kinkier fantasies had been driven out of my
brain. All I thought about was Joey - his innocence, his perfect beauty,
his sexual inquisitiveness. And I didn't jack off by myself all that
week...
all of my cums were saved for when Joey and I were together. Then
last week, after I had driven Joey away by my blind lust... my stupid
failure to realize the pain I was inflicting on him as I fucked his
virgin
ass.... Last week, I still thought only of Joey.
I wonder if Joey will tell his friends. I wonder if they'll be interested.
All I know is that if they want me, I'll do anything they ask. I would
love to have Joey - all by himself - back in my arms. But I would be
lying if I denied my raw sexual excitement for the prospect of having
sex with all three at once.
JOEY'S JOURNAL, Sunday night September 10, 1966
I like being with Mike SO MUCH!! We spent the whole afternoon
together, but he had to go at dinnertime because it's a school night.
But as I sit here at my desk, all I have to do is close my eyes and
I can see his face, and it gives me a really warm feeling inside.
He asked me if we could be best friends, and of course I said YES!!
He had also said those magic words - "Best Friends" - last night as
we lay together in my bed, right after we had that incredible
suck-session. (We were just doing some experimenting. It doesn't
mean we're queer or anything; Mike even read that it was normal,
in a library book that he told me about.) Anyhow, he said it last night,
but I wasn't sure he really meant it.
When he rode his bike over after church today, we went on a hike to
the abandoned farm out by Goat Hill. The barn is in pretty good shape
still, even though the farmhouse that used to be there is burned down.
They even left some stuff in there, like ropes and old leather strap
things with buckles. I'm guessing they used to have mules to pull a
plow. It's pretty strange when you drive around some of the areas
farther out in the country, to see farmers using a mule instead of a
tractor. Dad says maybe the farmers are so poor, they can't afford
a tractor. Of course, in our neighborhood all these new houses are
going up and there are hardly any real farms that actually grow
stuff anymore.
I showed Mike the hay loft, and he thought it was cool. The hay is
all pretty old and disintegrating, but it's dry because there's a solid
tin roof on the barn. We started throwing the hay all around and
then got in a hay-fight, stuffing it down each other's shirt and
wrestling in it and laughing. Then I stuffed some in the back of
Mike's pants! And even though he was laughing really hard, he
got a big handful and stuffed it in the front of MY pants. We called
a truce, standing there with our hands on our knees, out of breath
but happy.
"God, I'm itchy!" I said, and unbuttoned my shirt to shake it out.
"Me too," he replied; "guess we gotta take off our clothes to get
this stuff out of them!" He had this big grin on his face, and I knew
exactly what he had on his mind.
"Excellent idea!" I said, and started pulling off my shoes and sox
and pants. I kept my eyes on Mike, though, and he was looking
at my body too. When we were standing there in just our
underpants, my heart was beating even faster than when we had
finished the hay-fight. Grinning at each other like idiots, we
both hooked our thumbs under the waistbands of our identical
white brief and slowly pulled down. My penis was already a
total bone! It had been since we started stripping. Mike's was
half-hard, sticking straight out, the foreskin completely covering his
cockhead, not even allowing his piss slit to show. Without saying
a word, I knelt at Mike's feet, picked up a piece of straw, and ran
it slowly, softly over the shaft of his penis. He giggled and his
penis gave a little jump. I ran the straw all along his dick and
ballsack, and his penis began to raise itself into a boner, a little
bit at a time, jacking itself up with each beat of his heart. In just a
few
moments, Mike's cock was pointing straight up and half of his
cockhead protruded from the turtleneck of its foreskin. I reached out
my hand and felt a rush of warmth flow through my body as my
fingertips touched Mike's 4 1/2" boner. The first thing I did was to
pull down the skin to expose all of his slender reddish cockhead.
When I let go, the foreskin stayed below the ridge, and I savored
the way it looked, especially with the wisps of blond hair growing
at its base. I think it is the nicest looking boner I've ever seen!
(And I just figured out that I've seen 7, not counting my own... 9
if you include the twins at the beach that time - I felt up both of
them underwater, but couldn't really see what they looked like.)
"You have a really neat boner," I said, looking up at him. Then
my tongue darted out and flicked against his cockhead. I couldn't
resist! I moved the foreskin back up and licked it, rolled it gently
between my lips, explored this wonderful "addition" to what had
only recently become my favorite body part. I was sucking off
just his foreskin... well, I guess I was licking his cockhead a
bunch too... and it was SO cool!
"Oh God! Stop for a minute! That's about to make me cum and
I want to last a while longer," he moaned as he pulled me to my
feet and immediately wrapped his hand around my boner. We stood
there, feeling each other, jacking each other, smiling at each other.
We each had our right hand on the other's boner and our left on his
shoulder. Man, it felt good. It was like when we were sucking each
other last night, except I could see Mike's face... see the look of
pleasure... know that I was making him feel as good as he was
making me feel.
"Oh, Joey," panted Mike; "let me suck you... ok?"
"Yes, Mike! Do it!" I sighed. In an instant he was on his knees
and I felt his hot breath on my most sensitive skin. All I could see
was the top of his head, but the memory of what I could feel at
that moment... it makes me shiver with pleasure as I write these
words. His hand lightly touching my ballsack, his wet lips kissing
the top of my boner... his lips parting slightly... his tongue gently
exploring the piss slit... his warm mouth surrounding my cockhead
as his tongue swirled around.... Oh, MAN! It was SO good. My
hands just automatically came rest on his head and my fingers
caressed his soft short dark-blond hair. I know I was saying stuff
to Mike about how good it was, but I couldn't tell you what I said.
I was in another world! A world that... I really can't put it in
words... that was totally composed of fantastic sexy feelings.
Mike's head bobbed up and down, his lips going all the way down
to the base of my penis, his hand squeezing my ballsack gently.
I knew I was close. I was going to cum, and I wanted it so bad.
Mike's lips and tongue were moving up and down the shaft of my
boner, again and again, and I thought I would burst! And then
I did! All the good feelings were focused into my cock and it
exploded with pleasure, and I had the most incredible cum! Mike's
mouth was locked onto my boner and after last of the big surges
of pleasure died down, I felt every movement of his lips or tongue
like it was an electric shock... REALLY intense... finally TOO
intense, and I pulled my penis out of his mouth.
Now it was my turn to lift him up off his knees, and I did something
without thinking about it. I hugged him! I wrapped my arms around
his shoulders and held him so tight he was probably suffocating.
By the time it occurred to me that he might not like me doing this,
I realized that he had his arms just as tight around my back. It felt
so wonderful! His hands were moving along my back and shoulders,
even down to my rear end, and his chest was tight against mine,
and his stiff boner was pressing against my belly! And Mike was
pushing his hips against me so his boner was sliding against my
sweaty skin. It felt so good to hug him! We changed our arms a
little so we each had one arm over the other's shoulder and one
around the back. My face was right against his and I could feel
his urgent warm breath against my neck. The stiffness of his
penis throbbed against me. I could feel his heart beating against
my chest!
"Do you want me to..." I was going to ask if I could suck him,
but didn't even get the words out.
"Just like this... I'm almost there... just a little more..." he gasped,
and I realized he was about to cum, rubbing his cock against
my belly. I felt so... (Oh God; this is going to sound queer!) I felt
so loving toward Mike; my heart was filled with happiness and
friendship, and I hugged him tighter than ever. I felt his body
get tense and his breathing stop... then the sounds of his gasps of
pleasure and a sudden wet warmth against my belly. And even
though I wasn't even hard, I felt a sexy feeling all through my
body... like I was feeling some of what Mike was experiencing!
"Oh, Joey... Joey, I... That was SO good!" whispered Mike, in
excited out-of-breathness next to my ear.
I'm not sure how long we held each other like that, up in the
loft of the old barn, naked as new-born babies, on this beautiful
warm September afternoon. I guess only another minute or so.
But we held each other tight. And didn't talk. Everything in my
head would have sounded too queer coming out of my mouth,
and maybe Mike felt the same way. I even thought for a second
that I wanted to kiss him, but of course I didn't. It would have
ruined everything.
As we let go of each other, I touched the sticky wetness just
below my belly-button... ran my fingers across it, and brought
my fingers to my mouth. There was the same salty-sweet taste
from last night. I smiled at Mike as he watched me do it. Then
Mike used his fingertips to wipe a blob of it off my hip and brought
his hand up to his mouth, sucking his cum fluid from his fingers.
We both smiled without saying anything, but it seemed to me
like it was one of those Indian "blood-brother" things.
As we walked home, the sun was getting low in the sky, and a
great weekend was almost over. Mike stopped for a moment
and looked at me.
"Joe.... Can we be best friends?"
"But Mike," I said with a smile, "we already are!" And as we started
walking again I put my arm around his shoulder, and he put his
around mine, and I don't think I've ever felt happier in my
whole life!
Darn. Mom just told me it's time to go to bed.
BILL'S JOURNAL, Monday morning, September 11, 1966
Not much time to write before I have to go to school, but I want to
get this down before I forget it. Christ! That dream I had was so
incredibly erotic! I know dreams are SUPPOSED to be weird,
but this one takes the cake. I don't remember it all, but in the
beginning of the dream, I'm standing in front of my English class
giving a speech. (You know how you sometimes dream of things
you're worried about? Well, I still haven't figured out my topic for
the public speaking assignment next week.)
Anyway, in my dream I'm speaking about... get this!... homosexuality!
(But after all that research I did at the University library, trying to
understand what it would mean to be a homosexual, I guess I actually
COULD give a speech about it... Yeah, SURE!!) So I'm talking about
all the famous artists and writers throughout history who were
homosexuals, and their pictures are flashing up on this screen
beside me. But I was getting heckled by my classmates: "Fag!"
"Fairy!" "Homo!" And then I'm talking about how the ancient Greeks -
the originators of our civilization - believed that the spiritual and
sexual love for a barely pubescent boy was the highest form of
human expression. But instead of a slide picture, there was Joey
standing beside me, naked except for a laurel wreath in his golden
hair, posing like a statue. And as I talked about the Greeks and boy
love, I'm running my hands over Joey's body, especially his beautiful
erection. And the voices from the class grew louder: "Faggot!"
"Queer!" "Pervert!"
If only I could have directed the "plot" of my dream, I would have
kicked out all the stupid 10th graders, dropped the "speech" bullshit,
and had Joey all to myself. But dreams have a direction all their own.
I started speaking to the class about the Roman emperors... about the
boy-harem that Tiberius kept on the Island of Capri... of Hardian's love
for the beautiful Greek boy Antinous...
And also of Elagabalus, (Rome's "queer-est" emperor) who became
emperor at age 14 and ruled until he was assassinated at age 18;
whose palace staff consisted not only of sexy boys but also virile
soldiers who were chosen primarily for their extraordinary endowment;
who had part of his palace decorated to resemble a brothel, at the
door of which Elagabalus would stand and pretend he was a whore
soliciting business from "cutomers" (and the customers always
consisted of a squad of burley palace guards whose job it was
to fuck the emperor's ass until he was satisfied.
And as I'm talking, I look down and see that... I'm naked... and
my cock is hard and throbbing. An then all of a sudden there
are Joey's two friends, Mike and Justin, dressed as Roman soldiers,
except their cocks were fully exposed. And (naturally, I guess) their
erections were huge! And then Joey is lying naked on the teacher's
desk, and I'm leaning over him, sucking his cock, and I raise my
ass up like a bitch dog in heat to be fucked by the "roman soldiers".
Everyone in the classroom is laughing and mocking me, but my
humiliation is overridden by intense lust. And I moan as Justin
stands behind me and spreads my ass cheeks apart. And his thick
erection glides into my body as if my asshole were the hot, wet pussy
of a slutty 18-year-old cheerleader. Ah, only in a dream! There is
none of the initial discomfort, just total erotic bliss. Even as he pounds
his cock into me and slaps my ass hard with his hand.
"Fuck me! Fuck me hard!" I'm pleading, even as I suck off Joey's
perfect cock.
And then the scene transformed from my high school classroom to the
shower room in the gym at my old middle school. I'm surrounded by
naked, wet boys, just as I remembered from those years... boys at all
stages of development, from totally immature 6th graders to hairy 8th
graders. Only, in my dream, they were all hard and they were all
surrounding me and jacking themselves. When I look down at myself,
I'm pre-pubescent, hairless... but my penis is achingly erect. (I think
my brain had dredged up the image of myself from the time - at age
12, I think - that I basically "discovered" my erection, admired it in a
full-length mirror, toyed with it, and experienced the first hints of the
secret feelings my fingers could produce. It would be another year
before I learned how to masturbate, but it was the first step of
discovering sexuality.)
I was overwhelmed by the array of erect boy-dicks around me... there
for me to touch... to suck... to gaze at with lust. It was all flashing
before me like a kaleidoscope... on my knees in the shower room,
surveying a sea of hard penises being stroked by their young owners.
And then the boys started cumming... shooting into my face, my open
mouth, all over me. Even the little 6th grade boys were shooting
spurt-after-spurt of cum, and I was in ecstacy.
Then I was awake! The sky was just beginning to lighten with pre-dawn.
I was sweating and breathing heavily, and both my hands were inside
my undershorts, holding my hard cock So of course I HAD to jack it off,
lasting as long as I could, rerunning to the best of my ability the whole
scenario of the dream. God! I truly AM a cocksucking faggot boylover!
Well that's it for now. Time for breakfast and - UGH! - school.
JOEY'S JOURNAL, Monday night, September 11, 1966
I rode my bike to school today instead of taking the bus, and Mike
asked if I could go to his house after school let out. I called Mom
from the ice cream shop, and she said OK. It was really fun! He
has a younger brother and a much younger sister (I think she's 5).
He has to share a bedroom with his brother, Patrick. Patrick is
actually kind of cool! He looks sort of like Mike, except he has
longer hair. He's almost 11 and is in the 5th grade, and he and
Mike don't seem to argue or fight at all, unlike a lot of brothers.
He played football in the back yard with me and Mike, and he's
a pretty good athlete. Makes me kind of wish I wasn't an only-child.
Mike's house is smaller and a lot older than ours (and definitely
nothing like Justin's!) but it's not poor-looking or anything. I like
his mom. She gave us chocolate chip cookies, right out of the
oven. And he has a really big back yard with a cool tree-house
back in the woods behind the lawn. Mike gets to cut the lawn
with a riding mower! I told him it would be really cool to use one,
but he says it's just as boring as the kind you push... after the
first couple times. We went up to his room to check out his
models, and he has this 5-foot-high partition thing going half-way
across the room between his bed and Patrick's. And on his side
of it, Mike has some posters - like that one of Nancy Sinatra with
the long boots (Just now, I sang the chorus of "These Boots Are
Made For Walkin"... too bad I'm not using a tape recorder for my
Journal!) Anyway, he also had one of Johnny Unitas, the
quarterback for the Colts, and Illya Kuryarkin from "Man From
UNCLE" (I think his name is really David McAllen, or something.
He's really cool and... handsome). Mike has made even more
models than me! A bunch of them are race cars, like those really
crazy ones with the enormous engine sticking out of the hood
and lots of exhaust pipes. I'll have to get one at the hobby shop
on Saturday.
We spent a lot time playing football with Patrick. We played
catch and ran pass patterns for a while. Then we played
"slaughter the quarterback". Whoever had the ball got chased
by the other two guys until he got tackled. It was lots of fun,
but I got grass stains all over my tan Levis, and Mom's pissed
off about it! I don't know whether this was just my imagination,
but it seemed like Patrick was trying to feel me up! Not really
obviously, but when we were on the ground after a tackle his
hand sometimes rubbed the front of my pants. And when we
were on the ground, he held onto me kind of longer than you
would expect. And then Mike started doing the same thing!
And you know what? I really liked it! And I started kind of doing
it to both of them! After we had played for a while (and I was
actually getting kind of horny!) Mike suggested we go to the
tree-house - all three of us. It's SUCH a cool tree-house, with
a rope ladder coming up through a trap-door in the floor, carpet,
windows with shutters that close, and even cushions to sit on.
But just when we got up there, Mike's mom called out to us to
say that my Mom had just phoned and wanted me back home
for dinner. Mike only lives about 2 miles away, so it didn't take
long to ride back.
Today was another really good day. And I'm getting to know
Mike better all the time, and LIKE him more all the time. And I
even like his family. (Didn't meet his dad, though.)
School was fine. It was the first day of football. It's during the
last period, and if you don't try out for the team (or if you get
cut), you do study hall for that period. If you make the team
you get study time during the period when everyone else is
taking PE (that's what they call gym class here). Today it wasn't
much more than getting uniforms fitted and showing the coaches
how well you can run and throw and kick so they can assign
positions. I'm a pretty good at running patterns and catching the
ball, so I have my fingers crossed that I'll be picked as a receiver.
Playing in the line would be really boring.
We took showers in this big shower room, with like 20 shower
heads! And of course everyone was naked. It was mostly 7th
and 8th graders trying out for the team, but also some 6th
graders. I was a little worried that I'd feel embarrassed about
not having any hair above my penis, but LOTS of kids don't.
Some are even 8th graders! And my penis is actually pretty
good size compared to most of the others. Of course, a lot of
the 6th graders are tiny. There are some 8th graders who are
REALLY big, though. And hairy too. I know you're supposed
to stare at guys in the shower, but everyone seemed to be
doing it, but just for a few seconds at a time. I KNOW a lot of
the guys were glancing at ME! It was cool!
Woops! It's quarter-after-ten! Time for bed.
JOEY'S JOURNAL, Tuesday afternoon, September 12, 1966
"Circle-jerk". That a pretty funny word. But it was a lot of fun!
And I hope I get invited to do it again. At football practice,
Justin came up to Mike and me and said in a low voice that he
was organizing a circle-jerk for after practice, out behind the gym.
Mike said "sure", and so did I, even though I didn't know what it
was! Mike whispered to me that it's when a bunch of guys get
together and jack off all at the same time. Justin had talked about
doing it at the camp he went to last summer, and Mike thought
it sounded cool. I did too!
During showers, I looked over at Justin, and he was smiling at
me while he washed himself. And he was soaping up his dick
and it was starting to get a little hard! He winked at me, and I
looked away. I think I blushed.
So when we got dressed, Mike showed me the place. It's a
clearing in the middle of some pretty dense woods about 100
yards from school property. Justin was there and other
guys were arriving too. It ended up with about10 of us! And
some of them were 8th graders. (Mike whispered to me that
Justin has some buddies in the 8th grade because they used
to be his classmates before he had to repeat 5th grade.)
Mike kind of directed everything, just like he seems to do
whenever he's with any group. I think some of the
other guys had done a circle-jerk before, though, because
they were making these comments about being all horny and
"let's get going so I don't miss the bus". We all got in a circle
(naturally!) and I was just following along with what everyone
else did, and when Justin undid his pants and pushed them
down to his knees, then pulled his underpants half-way down
his hips, I did the same. So did everybody else. Justin was
wearing a tee-shirt and did something cool... he pulled his head
out but left his arms in, then pulled the whole front of the shirt
behind his neck. He really looked... well, sexy. I was wearing
a madras button-down, so I just unbuttoned it and pushed it back.
Everyone was making themselves hard, and it was REALLY
exciting! You know how in the shower you're only supposed
to glance at other guys' dicks for a couple seconds? Well, in
a circle-jerk you can stare as long as you like! I know other
guys were really checking out my boner, just like I was checking
theirs, and I tried to put on a good show. You know, kind of
leaning the top part of my body back and pushing my boner
out... and running my fingertips along the shaft so people could
see it throbbing really stiff.
Justin said "check this out!" and without touching himself made
his boner bob up and down! He said you just have to flex your
ass muscles, so I tried it... and it worked! Everyone else was
doing it too, and it looked so cool to see all those boners
bouncing around! Then Justin said "alright... contest to see
who can make himself cum first. Ready... go!" And we all start
jacking ourselves really fast. Mike's right next to me, and he's
making his foreskin go back and forth over this cockhead. And
I'm doing two fingers and my thumb in a circle. And Justin's
doing his whole first. One of the 8th graders shot his cum in
about 20 seconds! I wasn't anywhere NEAR the fastest, but I
wasn't slowest either. We all shot pretty fast, though. Mike was
a little before me, and Justin almost last. The group broke up
pretty quickly after that, because we had to go back to the lockers
and get out books, and some of the guys had to get on the school
buses. Mike rides his bike, except when it's raining.
I asked Mike if he wanted to come over to my house, but he said
his mom was going to take him to the University library to do
research for the history project. He says the University library is
MUCH better than the public library, and you can get a card to let
you in by filling out some papers at our school office. We went to
the ice cream shop, though, and did some talking while we ate
our cones out under the trees. Mostly about the circle-jerk.
I mentioned that I had just doubled the total number of boners I
had ever seen in my entire life, and asked Mike when he first saw
one, other than his own. He acted kind of embarrassed and said
"you first". So I told him about Tony back home in Pennsylvania,
and how we had first gotten naked together when he slept over
at my house back in 5th grade. We were sort of daring each
other along and ended up completely naked. We felt each other
up and got really stiff, even though our boners were still pretty
small. Then I told Mike "your turn".
"This is a secret you can't tell ANYONE! Especially Justin!"
"I swear" and I held up my hand with a solemn expression on
my face.
"Well... you're going to think this is really perverted... but me
and my brother Patrick...". He pause for a long time, his face
blushing red.
"Yeeeessss??" I prompted, feeling excited about what I was
guessing he'd say.
"We've been kinda doing stuff together for about 2 years.
Him and me have shared a room for more than 5 years... ever
since my baby sister Linda was born, and we never had any
shyness with being naked together. Patrick and me have
always gotten along really well and... one thing just kind led
to another. I guess I was 10, and he was maybe 8 or 9... he's
18 months younger than me... and he was in my bed ^Ñcause
he was scared of a thunderstorm. And we were talking, and
I started touching him in a personal way, and he touched me,
and... well we took off our underpants and started feeling each
other... and I turned on the light so we could look at each other's
boner. Anyway he was about the same size as me... maybe a
little smaller. And we rubbed them together and all that stuff.
And ever since then, we've... uh... we've kinda done all the sex
things you can do."
"Everything? Like sucking?"
"Uh huh..."
"Like FUCKING!"
He blushed even deeper and shook his head ^Ñyes', then added
"he doesn't really fuck me ^Ñcause he's too small, but I let him lie
on my back and rub his boner in my ass crack and he really likes
it. But I've been fucking him for I guess a year, even before I
could cum. We don't kiss or say stupid stuff to each other or
anything... we just like to make each other feel good. That's
really queer and gross, huh?
"No! It's... I don't know... COOL! Makes me wish I had a little
brother. Also, I think Patrick is really... you know... kinda cute.
In fact, when I was at your house yesterday, I was thinking that
maybe the three of us were going to... uh... do some stuff.
Up in the tree-house."
Mike giggled. "Shit!! That time you went inside to use the
bathroom Patrick said he really wanted to see your boner
and practically BEGGED me to let the three of us do sex
stuff together. I told him ^Ñmaybe'. In fact, even if you wanted
to do it, I'm still not sure how I'd feel. Wanna hear something
weird? I feel like... I don't want to share you with Patrick...
and I don't want to share Patrick with you. Is that stupid, or what?"
"I think it's..." (I almost said "sweet"!) "It's a good way to feel,
and I understand exactly what you mean."
What I wanted to say was that I felt like I liked Mike more than ever.
Time for homework.
JOEY'S JOURNAL, Tuesday night, September 12, 1966
Just a quick entry before bed.
I talked to my history project partner just now, and she's kind
of cool. Bonnie McKendrick. She's really smart, but doesn't
show off about it at all. Seems like she's not in the "in-group".
I guess because she dresses in kind of boyish clothes - jeans
and regular shirts - instead of dresses, and she doesn't use
make-up. And also it seems like popular girls aren't supposed
to be smart. She has a really pretty face, though, and seems
really nice. Justin was telling me today, after the teacher
announced partners for the project, that Bonnie is a "lezbo",
whatever that means. Sounded from Justin's tone that it's
not a good thing to be. Oh well. I still like her.
Goodnight.
JOEY'S JOURNAL, Wednesday night, September 13, 1966
Mike came over today, and we... well, we did some something.
And I'm not entirely sure whether I should write about it, but I
guess I will. I think I feel really good about it, but... it's kind of
scary too.
After school, Mike biked over and we played around and talked.
And we were in my room and talking about school when he
asked me if I was going to the 7th grade dance - the "Fall Fling" -
on Friday of next week. I hadn't really thought about it and asked
him what it was like. I told him I'd never been to a dance before.
Turned out he's never been to one either, but Justin talked to
his 8th grade friends about it. The school hires a college kid
who brings all this DJ stuff and big speakers and lots of records.
The music is mostly fast dances, and it doesn't really matter if
you don't know how to dance; you can just do the twist if you
didn't know anything else. But the last song is a slow one,
and they turn down the lights, and it's kind of the unofficial rule
that couples make out with each other during the song, right
there in the middle of the gym, and the chaperones don't make
them stop like they would otherwise.
Mike said I should invite Mary Jane. (I was thinking, though,
that I^Ñd enjoy being with Bonnie better.) Then he brought up
that fib I told at Justin's sleep-over - about how I'd french-kissed
with her and felt her tits. He said he was really jealous of me!
I blushed a little, I think, and almost didn't say anything. But then
I decided that best friends shouldn't lie to each other.
"Uh, Mike.... I didn't actually do most of that stuff with May Jane.
Or any other girl, for that matter. I was just kind of saying it
because you and Justin were talking about how far you'd gotten
with girls. In fact, Mary Jane just gave me a quick kiss and I
didn't know what to do... so I didn't do anything, and I just, like,
said 'good-bye' to her, and I felt like a real jerk."
"Well..." said Mike, "I got a confession too. I didn't do that stuff
at Myrtle Beach that I was bragging about either. Fact is, I've
never done ANYTHING with a girl. I just didn't want Justin to
call me a nerd or something. Justin can get kind of mean
sometimes." After a pause he added "Do you ever wonder
what it's like to make out with a girl?"
"Of course!" I said. "I guess we'll find out if we go to the dance,
huh? Maybe you should take... whats-her-name... with the long
blond hair, in history class. Seems like she's always flirting with
you."
"Debbie Sue Wilson," he said. "Yeah, maybe. Hey, I got an idea!
Let's turn on the radio and practice dancing. I can sorta do those
dances like the jerk and the watusi and the froog. Patrick and I
sometimes practice at home. Wanna try?"
"Sure!" I said and turned on the radio. The "Ballad of the Green
Berets" was just finishing up, and we both sang along in loud
voices. Then they started playing "Cherish" by the Association,
which I can't stand, so I switched stations. WRNB was playing
"Cool Jerk" by some Negro group that I can't remember. We
both got up and started dancing around. Mike was DEFINITELY
better than me! I tried to copy what he was doing, and he
helped me out with suggestions. After the song was over,
there were a couple of commercials, and he showed me some
more stuff. The next song was "Reach Out" by the 4 Tops. I
just kind of shuffled around, trying to get comfortable with
something. I also watched Mike, thinking that he really looked
cool and that it was fun to be doing this with him. They started
up the next song with no commercials - "When a Man Loves
a Woman" by Percy Sledge. Whenever I hear it when I'm doing
my homework or something, I HAVE to stop and listen... it's like
it turns on this valve in my brain that holds my emotions. Not
too many things turn on that valve, but for some reason that
song is one of them. (Remember last Spring when I read that
book "Of Mice and Men"? When I finished the last page... POW!
The valve popped WIDE open!)
Anyway, Mike looked at me... and I looked at him...
"Think we oughta... you know, practice? Wanna do it... just for
a laugh?" he asked... but he had a serious look on his face.
"Yeah," I replied; "for practice... and just for fun." But my heart
was thumping against my ribs, and it felt like my face was
blushing a deep shade of purple as we awkwardly put our arms
around each other. He had his around my waist, so I ended up
as the "girl", with my arms around his neck. The music was
burrowing it's way into part of my brain where my emotions live
and opening up that valve, and I felt like I was melting in Mike's
arms. He's kind of huskier than I am, and I leaned on him as
our bodies pressed together and we swayed with the music.
I felt his arms tighten around me, and it was just like I felt when
we were up in the loft of the old barn on Sunday. I was so filled
with feelings that it seemed like I could hardly breathe, but I
never wanted it to end. I nuzzled my face against Mike neck,
and my lips brushed against his smooth skin below his ear.
Mike's body shivered slightly, and he murmured my name
softly... "Oh, Joey..."
I don't know whether he did it... or I did it... or we did it at the
same time.... I guess my eyes were closed and... it just
happened. Our lips touched for just a split-second, and my
head was spinning... my heart filled my chest, ready to
burst apart. Our lips closed upon each other, and I felt...
God!... It was this ravenous hunger to taste his wet lips, to
breathe his breath, to join ourselves together. Mike's tongue
touched my lips, and... instantly... I understood what real
kissing was. I wanted Mike's tongue in my mouth; mine in
his. I wanted every nerve ending of my tongue to explore
every warm, wet curve and micro-bump of his tongue. I was
lost in the world of our never-ending kiss. The DJ was
jabbering in the distant background; Paul Revere was
complaining that 'kicks just keep getting harder to find'; and
my Mom was off in some different galaxy (probably the kitchen,
fixing dinner). But Mike and I were joined together so tight that a
jackhammer couldn't have budged us apart.
Finally our mouths separated. And for the first time in all
this, I opened my eyes... staring straight into Mike face...
and his expression looked exactly the way I felt - happy,
confused, excited, exhausted... and ready to do it some more.
"Want to lie down?" he asked, even as he moved us
toward the bed.
"Let me lock the door first."
"Can we... do you want to... get undressed?"
"YES!" I said in a joyously emphatic whisper. We stripped
nude in record time, and our bodies were reunited on my
bed. Now there were two focuses for the churning energy
inside me - our tongues were back together, but now our
boners were doing their own dance as we lay side-by-side.
Mike was lying on my right arm and it was going numb, so
I rolled Mike's body onto mine. I liked the way it felt. My
hands could touch him all over - his back, his shoulders,
his hair, his slender ass, his strong, lean thighs. My legs
were spread and by instinct, I wrapped them around his
upper legs. He smiled warmly down at me as our mouths
joined again, and his thrusting hips made our cocks slide
together. With every push of his hips against me, my legs
pulled him into me and my crotch rose up to press us even
closer together. Mike hands were all over my upper body -
my face and hair, my arms and shoulders, my chest.
The late-summer heat and humidity made our bodies
slippery with sweat as we urgently thrust against each
other, chest sliding against chest, cock against cock,
tongue against tongue.
From the noises Mike was making, and the desperate
thrashing of his body, I knew he would cum any second.
I wrapped my arms around his back and pulled him tight
against me as his sperm splattered between our sliding
bellies. I was very close myself and probably would have
cum from rubbing against Mike's body, but only a few
moments after his cum, Mike wiggled his body down until
his face was at my straining penis. It disappeared into
his mouth, and Mike treated me to the wildest minute of
pleasure I'd ever felt. Then I too erupted, spraying my
fluid onto my friend's tongue.
Lying side-by-side, out of breath, I thought about what we
had done. Thoughts that I had been chasing from my brain
came back, stronger than ever. I didn't just "really, really like"
Mike. I LOVED him. I was sure of it. But it wasn't right!
It was queer to love another boy. What was I going to do?
"Mike?" I said at last. "We ought to get dressed. It's getting late."
"Yeah; I know.... Uh, Joey? We kinda got crazy just now, huh?
"Yeah; that's for sure.... But it was really fun, don't you think?"
"YEAH!" he replied with a big smile. "I'm not gonna tell anybody... ok?"
"Me neither. It's our secret." As we stood next to each other
and pulled on our underpants, I asked him (though I knew the
answer) "So... are we still best friends?"
"You KNOW it!! And that's not EVER gonna be a secret!"
I couldn't help myself. I gave him one last kiss on the lips... a
quick one. He looked at me for a few seconds with an expression
I couldn't read, and I thought that maybe I did exactly the wrong
thing. But then his incredible smile lit up his face, and he kissed
me back... longer and harder.
"We'll ALWAYS be best friends, Joey. ALWAYS!"
[The end... at least for now. Any suggestion are most welcome.]