Date: Thu, 15 May 2008 18:24:35 -0400
From: Sean E <ekidky@hotmail.com>
Subject: My Road of Lifes Discoveries - Ch 8

Discoveries on My Journey of Life
EKidKy - :o)

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Again, thanks for the patience everyone; it's been really
hectic here the last couple of weeks as I just finished end-of-term exams.
As always, the usual warning is in place - if you should not be reading
this - then don't. Otherwise, if you've been reading the other chapters,
you know what to (sort of) expect...

---------------------

--- Chapter Eight ---

I guess when it comes to family - brothers, cousins, in-laws, whatever -
different people have a different perspective on how they perceive one
another.  Even then, what one person perceives of someone isn't always
reflected back in the same manner.  There is always an added layer of
complexity to deal with, too, that - when it comes to trust - how much
trust you can put in, like a cousin or someone, to not go off and broadcast
to the rest of the family or the world that you're, uh, weird or something.

	A lot of times I go back to that fateful night that Jeremy was
playing with me in my bath tub, and I wonder what had been going through
his mind.  For my part, I'll say this again - when it all started I didn't
mind it that bad.  I wasn't exactly a shy person at that age, or even so
much as modest.  I think that was evident in the way I told him that night
he could come in to use the bathroom, and in the fact that at first, when
he was looking at me and started "feeling me up" I didn't really have that
much of an inhibition.  Still, it was a first-time experience; something I
had never even remotely came close to before.  I didn't have those cousins
or friends growing up that did the proverbial "I'll show you mine if you
show me yours", or play doctor, house, whatever.  Not that it was a bad
thing, just something I was very nieve and ignorant about - and what could
you really expect from an 8-yr old kid, right?  I know there are stories
here and there that try to imply that kids at that age have a lot more
knowledge about such things, a lot more experiences - whether fantasy or
not.  Well, for me though, I didn't have that kind of an environment, not
by a long shot.  Until Jeremy showed up that one weekend, I could have
cared less about my body in any way - other than, of course, the usual
pains and aches you get into when you're a kid.

	On this particular weekend, as we ate breakfast that morning, my
emotions were riding in a very high state; not since the time I had spent
with Cody had I ever really let myself feel like I had the night before.
Some people might think that sounds weird, especially to me as I write all
of this, trying to recall everything as close and as accurate as I can
remember.  Of course I was more educated, and I knew stuff then I didn't
know just a few short years before.  I mean, that's life, right? That what
kids do as they grow up, they learn and become more independent, making
themselves individuals, ready to face the world someday.  I just hadn't
figured I would ever get to feel, to hold anyone like that again, to really
believe inside that someone would like me or trust me that way.  I wasn't
going to *perv* on anyone, for fear of the rejection or humiliation that
could come from it.  I probably could have looked harder than I did,
probably could have messed around some, but I just didn't.

	That morning I was elated, happy and excited, and at the same time
I remember it hit me that Timmy was actually making little advances to me.
It was either that or he was going out of his way to impress upon me how
much he really did trust me, and that made me feel really good inside, in a
weird sort of way.  I remember some of our conversations online up to that
point, and I think some of how he reacted and all didn't surprise me too
much, while others nearly floored me.  Before I ever arrived that weekend,
I had opened up to him a little - he had sort of dragged some of it out of
me at times - and because I valued our friendship so much insofar as family
went, I didn't want to lie to him about anything.  If I ever came close, I
mostly just stopped short of any of the sex stuff or feelings that I felt.
I told him about Cody and me as best friends, and some of the stuff we had
talked about and done together - just not the intimate stuff.  Everything
else I lay on the line with him.  I didn't hide anything when it came to my
Mom and Dad, the kids giving me a rough time in school.  Tim seemed really
interested in me sometimes, often asking me questions I simply could not
answer for myself: why did Mom and Dad divorce? Why did Mom blow up at me
about the cam?  Was I a wimp or something, or else why did the kids pick on
me so much?  He was kind of a nosy kid sometimes, but he always struck me
as being pretty good hearted, and he always backed off if I seemed to
hesitate anything, always saying he was sorry, thinking he had gone too
far.

	That was a part of why I gave in so much.  Whenever he apologized
he looked really embarrassed, and I always felt kind of sorry for him, even
though I always told him it was okay, that he could ask me anything he
wanted to, anytime he wanted.  He was a lone kid like me - no brothers or
sisters, nobody to talk to about some things.  He even told me he and his
friends talked about some stuff, but they always thought he was either too
mushy or too nosy, or they wanted to get into things he could care less
about.  So when it came to certain subjects, he was all ears - and I
granted him his little audience I guess, letting him chat about everything
under the sun.  That's how I found out there were these two girls he really
liked, but he was really shy around them.  He was always asking me how he
should approach them, how should he talk to them, ask them things and stuff
like that.  I didn't have a clue - litterally - but I didn't want to deny
him the trust he was putting in me.  I knew when I was his age how much it
meant to me having someone to talk to, and he was pretty much in the same
boat.  I told him up front when I didn't know something, but that we could
always talk through anything he wanted to.  I always told him what I felt,
what it seemed to me was right.  In the end, I always told him I was just
me, that I couldn't be in his shoes or anything, not like with his friends,
his feelings or anything like that.  He respected that and we built our
relationship on that.

	I think he knew how I felt though, being pretty much alone and all,
but I don't think he ever thought of me as being weird or gay or anything.
I can't explain it exactly, but the bottom line was he never teased me
about that stuff, or the fact I never talked with him about girls.  I even
admitted to him that a few times Cody spent the night, that we would cuddle
some - not like gay cuddle or anything, but still just be close and safe,
sometimes hugging or whatnot.  He didn't scrunch his face up or anything to
that, which I was forever thankful for.  If anything, he just asked me what
it was like.  I told him I couldn't describe it - that some things in life
were just that way, that in the privacy of a moment it felt like you were
protected, that you were sharing some kind of feeling, some kind of trust
with someone who wasn't afraid to share it back with you.  I held my breath
at that, and the wait for his reply was putting me on edge like never
before until he answered me back.  He was satisfied with that description,
that explanation - he even said he thought it was 'cool', and when he did
he was smiling.  I let out a big breath afterwards, and was thankful for
the blessing in it.  Tim was alright in my book, to be 12 yrs old and have
as much empathy as he had.

	The night we had just spent together amplified those feelings all
over again, and at the breakfast table I must have just been dreaming or
something.  More than once Dad raised an eyebrow, my seeming attention
drifting at times away from the table.  He never said anything, not
directly anyway, and at one point I figured I was going to have to settle
in.  Tim was in a pretty good mood, and it showed in the enthusiasm in his
voice, and the way he bounced around the kitchen at times.

	After a time Dad turned to us and asked, "So, what do you boys want
to do today?"

	Tim answered first before I even got a chance to think about it
much. "Um, I got a game today at 1:30, so I thought maybe Sean would like
to go with me, maybe afterwards we could just hang around the rink and
skate a while."  He looked at me, the question hanging in the air.

	"Well, sure, I'll go to the game, but ummm... I don't know how to
skate," I answered, blushing.

	He laughed.  "Oh... you ever roller skate then? or skateboard?"

	My embarrassment got deeper. "Umm, no..."

	Dad looked up from his paper and turned to Tim.  "Sean probably
doesn't have a lot of opportunity to do that sort of thing at home.  I
don't remember there being a rink or anything around there since I was a
kid."

	Tim's eyes got a faraway expression, and then almost immediately he
split into a grin. "AAhhhh...  Oh well, it doesn't matter, if you're game,
we can still have some fun with the guys and everything."

	I shrugged my shoulders and looked at Dad.  He raised another
eyebrow and I hesitated, voicing my thoughts to him.  "It doesn't leave us
much time though, does it?"

	Dad laughed.  "You two go ahead, we'll have plenty of time when Tim
starts back in school.  You're here for a whole week, remember?"

	I grinned and nodded.  Tim said "Great!" and we went on for a bit,
him telling us about his team and the game, who they were playing, what it
was like.  I found it a little interesting, as I had never really watched
or understood a hockey game in that much detail before, and before long
both Dad and I were asking questions, listening to what some of the rules
were, how teams played in leagues, etc.  What I remember most was, given
his enthusiasm, Tim played the role of the jock really well - but was still
pretty subdued about it.  Not once did he ever try to act macho or say
anything about how good he was (or not).  He was pretty modest in that
respect, and it didn't look forced or anything, just like it was him and
his personality.

	Later that morning, we left for his house where Dad dropped us off,
telling us he would pick us up later that evening, and that we would all go
out to eat afterwards.  The rest of the day went by like a blur to me.
When we got to Tim's house, we just barely had enough time for him to get
ready before we had to leave for the game, and he wasted no time shedding
his clothes and getting into his gear.  He even packed some more clothes to
change into afterwards before we went out the door, his Mom rushing us to
the game.  His Dad was working that day, so he probably wouldn't be there,
and his Mom told us that although she would be there for most of the game,
she would probably have to leave before it ended.  She worked in real
estate (I think) and had some sort of appointment she had to keep for that
evening.  Tim didn't seem to mind, and from some of our past online chats,
I knew they supported him pretty well, being at most of his games and
stuff.

	When we arrived, we headed straight for the locker room, him
dragging me inside with him even as I hesitated and whispered "I can't go
in there with you guys Tim!"  I was introduced to his coach and his friends
as his "Cousin from Kentucky", and for the most part they all acknowledged
and welcomed me there.  Some of the guys were in the process of changing
clothes, but didn't seem to mind my presence, and of course with all the
flurry of the moment, I didn't really spend any time watching them.  The
coach gave them their pep-talk, made some last-minute assignments and
changes, and then ushered all of us out onto the floor.  Since he and I
didn't have on any skates, he led me through to the "box" while the others
went out into the rink to warm up.

	A sizable crowd was surprisingly already there, many of them
parents, friends and family of the players on the various teams, wildly
cheering them on.  I remember asking Tim's coach if he wanted me to sit
behind the box or anything, and he just told me it would be okay to stay
with them as long as I didn't get in the way of the guys coming in or going
back out onto the floor.  I watched Tim closely for a while, kind of
thrilled to be there and be a part of this thing that was so much a part of
his life.  I didn't know a lot about the game other than what we learned
talking that morning, but I knew from watching all of them they got a lot
of exercise.

	It probably explained how he - along with everyone else - was so
physically fit overall.  Moving from one side of the arena to the other,
the occasional scuffle between the opposing teams, the hard fought scores -
everything was much like the movies and what few games I did see on TV.  In
the end, they all worked up an unmistakable sweat, and when the final
buzzer sounded, they were crestfallen to have lost the game 3 to 2.  I knew
they were disappointed, but they seemed to have a good attitude about them
as they lined up, exchanged the customary handshakes, high-fives, whatever
with the other team, and then one by one each team left the rink to return
to the locker room.  Once again I hesitated, and was starting to go out
into the bleachers, but Tim caught me and pulled me inside with him.

	Once we were in the locker room, the coach gave the usual pep talk,
saying it was still a great game, that they just had a few lousy breaks was
all.  He established the next practice for the following Wednesday after
school, then left everyone to their own accord.  Some of the kids had
parents waiting outside, so they just left straight away; some of them
started taking their equipment off, including Tim, so to be fair I just
sort of sat down facing him in his corner, straddling one of the benches
with my back to the others.  I noticed he was pretty reserved while he
changed, using me as a shield I think to separate him from the other guys.
I remember thinking, 'Wow, he really is shy!' but it made me feel good he
wasn't that way to me, because he looked at me a time or two, smiling,
trying to hurry up, but yet stood really close while he changed.  After a
while, some of his buddies gathered round and started talking about what
they were going to do.  Tim piped up and said that he and I were going back
out on the ice, that he was going to watch and laugh his ass off while I
tried to learn how to skate.  The others laughed at that, then started
talking with me a little, just idle chit-chat about where I was from, what
I was into, stuff like that.  Before long, one of them came up to me and
put his foot up next to mine.  He made a comment that he figured our shoe
size was pretty close, then he offered to let me wear his skates for a
while.  I was surprised, but sure enough they fit perfectly, and afterwards
a couple of them helped Tim in getting me from the locker room back out
onto the floor.

	It was... okay, an interesting experience.  As you can imagine, I
fell a lot - much to the amusement of the guys and a few others who had
hung around after the game.  Eventually though, they started holding me up
and helping me learn how to balance myself, and before long I actually
could skate short distances in a straight, well, mostly straight line.  It
ended up being a lot of fun, and for a while time seemed to just float on
by.  I noticed Dad had come into the arena at some point with my uncle,
Tim's dad, and they both were sitting up in the stands, watching us for a
while.  Eventually, I was beginning to get sore - not just from the
falling, but from exercising a lot of muscles in learning to balance and
everything as well.  Before long Tim said we should probably start getting
ready to go, so we said bye to the few guys who were still hanging around,
and headed back to the locker room, where I put the borrowed skates back
into a locker.  I even found a notepad and wrote a quick word of thanks
before we closed it up.  I looked at Tim as we were getting our shoes back
on, and I noticed both of us were almost ringing wet.  It made me realize
once again how much exertion it had taken on us, and doubly so for him
since he had played all out in the game.  He caught me looking at him and
just grinned. "Well, was it fun?"

	"You better believe it!" was my quick reply, grinning back at him.

	We left, found our Dads in the stands and headed outside to the
Blazer.  Before long we were on the road, and Dad was asking if we wanted
to go out for a steak or get pizza tonight.  Now, you have to understand -
Mom makes a really mean homemade pizza that is out of this world, so that
was pretty normal for us.  We didn't eat out much, even for fast food,
mostly because it was just expensive and because she never thought of it as
being very healthy.  It's not like we didn't eat out any - every once in a
while we treated ourselves to something a little different, but steaks were
almost a taboo.

	The only times I got to have those were often when I came to visit
Dad.  I think he made it a point to always take me out and try different
things, always taking me places where I didn't really get to go.  He loved
doing that and every once in a while he would always give me a little money
and tell me to take Mom out somewhere, too.  That's one thing I loved so
much about Dad too - it's not that he had a lot of money, just that he was
always trying to do stuff for me and making me feel appreciated.

	I remember looking at Tim and he shrugged his shoulders.  I knew he
probably was a pizza kind of kid, so I hesitated, not sure what to say. He
finally piped up for us both. "How about we get steak tonight and maybe a
pizza tomorrow?"  I could have hugged that kid on the spot, but I kept
myself in check, instead grinning at him in response to the quizzical look
on his face.

	Dad saw my grin, then laughed. "Okay, okay..."  Before long we
pulled into a Sizzler (I think that's what it was called), and the four of
us went inside.  All of us ended up ordering steaks that night - even Tim,
who I knew wasn't that big on red meat (and neither was I really, except
for cheeseburgers), but who once again surprised me as not only did he
order it - he finished it faster than the rest of us!  We all chatted and
laughed, listening to stories about Dad or my uncle from their days of
growing up together.  I wish I could remember some of them now, but the
nostalgia just wasn't there I guess, nothing stood out to me that much
other than remembering some of it was pretty cool.

	Once again Tim asked if he could spend the night, and his Dad got
that amused look on his face.  "I figured you would get around to that
sometime tonight," he said with a bit of laughing.  "I already spoke with
your mother about it and yes, you can."

	He was thunderstruck, almost speechless for a moment before he let
out a mini-yelp and gave me a high-five.  Both our Dads just laughed, with
mine making the comment "These two are almost becoming inseparable, you
know?"  Tim's Dad just smiled and nodded.

	It was about 7:30 that night when we left the restaurant, and
surprisingly both Tim and I were really tired, even though it wasn't all
that late.  We stopped at a grocery to get some milk and stuff, and then
turned toward Tim's house.  As soon as we dropped off his Dad, we headed
home and Dad told us to go up and try to not make so much racket wrestling
tonight.  I giggled, thinking he must have heard our little scuffle the
night before, but it was all cool.  We both climbed the stairs, and I
noticed Dad turned out the lights after putting the groceries away, heading
for his bedroom.  We got to the top of the steps and entered our room,
where I immediately flopped on the bed and just lay there, not moving a
muscle.  Timmy joined me and for a few minutes we looked at each other
before I finally spoke.  "That was cool watching you play today."

	He nodded, but said nothing.  I finally pushed up and told him I
was going to get in the shower, that I felt hot and sticky.  He nodded
again, and rolled over onto his back, kicking his shoes off into the floor
and then watching me.  I got some fresh briefs and another t-shirt from my
bag and sat back down on the edge of the bed, my back to him, kicking off
my own shoes and socks.  I pulled off my shirt and belt, and placed them on
the dresser with my watch.  I could see in the mirror he was watching, and
in one way I was kind of thrilled with it.  I wasn't quite as nervous as I
was the night before now, having been around each other had made us drop
some of that awkwardness, I think.  It was a lot easier for me this time
when I stood up and decided to just unbutton and drop my jeans in front of
him again, for the second time that weekend.  I kicked them off and turned
and went into the bathroom, knowing full well his eyes were on me, but I
honestly didn't care - not because I was trying to be sexy or anything like
that, but because he had showed so much trust to me that weekend, I was
just trying to give some back.  I started the water in the shower, adjusted
the temperature, and dropped my briefs to the floor.  After putting my
glasses on the vanity I just got in, pulling the curtain up around me.  I
never closed the door or anything, and after rounding the doorway, I never
saw Tim's face from that point onward.

	As the water hit me, I felt a lot the aches and bruises I had
acquired for the day start to diminish.  The hot water was soothing, really
making me feel a lot better, so much so I leaned against the wall and
closed my eyes for a minute, soaking it all in.  How long I stood there I
do not know, but I do know I was completely oblivious to anything going on
around me, I heard nothing but the sound of shower and its steady stream
hitting me.  I remember though getting a funny feeling - one of those sixth
sense feelings, kind of like a tickle at the back of your head, making you
aware of something, and it caused me to open my eyes and look around.
There stood Tim, inside the tub with me, pulling the curtain back in place
around us.

	I was in shock, and he quickly put a finger to his lips, quietly
hushing me and making sure I didn't make a sound.  I thought about covering
myself up for a split second, then decided what was the use; I nodded I
understood, watching him come up closer, fully naked and with a fully hard
boner - so hard that, even though I didn't drop my eyes down to look at
him, I could tell it was pointing not outward, but upward at us.  He
smiled, I think waiting to see what I would do or say. There was no point
in my questioning him about any of it; I didn't ask him if he was sure
about this or anything, because there he was, in front of me.  I smiled
back, then giggled ever so softly, to which he giggled back, then stepped
up close to me under the water.  I saw him shut his eyes as the water
started trickling down over his head, and when we were so close, both his
"Little Tim" and my "Little Sean" - which was not quite so little anymore,
trust me - started bumping and almost kissing with each other on their
sides.

	I'm not sure which of my emotions were more prevalent at that
moment.  I was paralyzed I think, still in shock at the fact he was doing
this.  This was NOT like some after-game event, or after-gym thing where
guys grab a shower before returning to the real world.  In those cases,
lots of guys ignored each other's nakedness I think, or at least didn't let
it show for fear of being typecast as a queer or worse.  This was me and my
cousin, a younger cousin at that, testing ourselves I guess, but certainly
it was being initiated by him more so than me.  I was happy, curious and
everything rolled up into one.  Since the night he mooned me on the cam, I
had wondered what he might be like - and now I was finding out.  He reached
beside me after a minute and took the soap bar and a washcloth from a
nearby shelf.  Lathering it up, I watched him, mesmerized, still not
lowering my eyes to what I wanted to see, but still taking him in.  Instead
of soaping himself up though, he took the cloth and started washing my
chest and shoulders, under my arms, everywhere he could reach on my upper
body, which surprised in another way.  He had me turn around at one point
and did the same to my back, even moving down on my butt and pushing into
my crack a little, before dropping to his knees and continuing up and down
my legs.  He turned me around again, and he looked at my now fully hard
cock up close, glancing up and grinning at me.  There was a silent question
crossing his face, and I think he was waiting for permission or something.
I grinned at him, and in answer I spread my legs and nodded.  It was all he
needed as he started pushing his hand up between my thighs, and between the
washcloth and his bare hands, he cupped and cleaned everything in my groin,
using care around my nuts and rubbing my stiff member.  I almost closed my
eyes as the second person in my life to ever hold me, ever sort of just
play with my privates, did his thing.  As I watched him though we was
amazed at my sin and uncut-ness, and I was reminded of another time and
another certain boy who had been that way with me as well.  Of course, him
handling me was making me even harder, and I started to pulse and throb a
little.  He didn't really handle me in a sexual way I think, other than he
did once sort of pull back on my skin a couple of times, but each time he
stopped only after so far, obviously unsure.

	Eventually he let go of me and stood up, handing me the bar of soap
and washcloth, then took his place under the stream of water.  He raised
both hands to the sky and waited for me, and I was thinking it was really
cool.  Whatever the reason though I wasn't really sure of myself, and I got
really nervous and shaky again as I soaped up the cloth, then tried to do
him as he had with me.  It was obvious I wasn't handling it very well,
because I felt clumsy at times, dropping the soap or knocking off a bottle
from the shelf.  At one point, he took his hand on top of mine when I was
on his belly, and he just held me there for a second, not saying a word,
but looking at me and smiling.  I wasn't sure why, but for some reason it
calmed me down, and when he let go and I continued, I felt a lot better
about what I was doing.  When I dropped to my knees, I went all around his
mid-section, avoiding my prize - mostly because it wasn't mine, not what I
had expected anyway.  I sneaked little looks here and there, but I
concentrated more on relaxing and taking my time, being patient as I
finished with his feet.  When I looked back up at him, into his eyes, I
only had one last area to go.  He returned his gaze back down at me and
took my hand, putting it right on his shaft, right on this thing that was
pointing almost straight up.  It was so hard to my touch, throbbing and
pulsing, waiting for me I think.  He smiled as he whispered to me, "Go on,
I did you, so do me."  He kept holding my hand there until I looked at him
and nodded, grinning, then he let go and closed his eyes.

	I took a deep breath and then I did it - I looked at him up close;
I finally took into view something I had not done in a long, long time
again.  With my hand I gently felt around him, knowing it was now or never
to explore what he was like.  I didn't need my glasses; I was close enough
to make out every little detail about him.  It was so cool looking at his
hardness in front of me, the way it stood almost staright up without any
help.  It had a slight curve to it, with a cut crown shining and peeking
out at me.  I could only imagine how much blood had to fill him inside in
order for it to pint skyward like it did; in all the porn I had seen -
which wasn't much, mind you, so maybe that's why it surprised me like it
did - I had never seen any dick do like his was doing.  Without using the
washcloth, I lathered my hand up well and gently cupped his nuts, which
hung loosely underneath.  I heard him gasp when I did that, and smiled
because I knew how it had felt to me my first time.  Could this be the same
for Tim?  I didn't know.  I leaned in and lifted them, looking underneath a
little, and noticed his nuts were different than mine.  Not only just loose
and low hung, but the scrotum was thin-like, and his marbles seem to be
more profound inside.  I could actually catch a faint scent of him while I
was there, and I wished I could have gotten more; I played with them a
little, definitely more sexually than just washing or cleaning, and I
looked up at his face at times to find his eyes remaining closed.  He
didn't care, he was enjoying it, and you could see that peaceful expression
on his face.  If I hadn't been afraid of crossing a line with him, I might
have even sucked him right then, you know, given him a kind of full
experience.  I couldn't do it though, not then.  He might not have cared,
but I cared - he was my cousin, and I did not want to perv on him like one
had once done to me.

	When I moved up to his raging hard member, I used my bare hand to
go up and down it a couple of times, before finally letting the water rinse
it off.  If I were guessing, he had about 4.5" of cool hardness there,
where his crown was pulled back so tight the tip was displayed like an
arrowhead almost.  My own dick was skinny, but it was a lot thicker than
his, and of course I was 15 at the time, so it was probably between 5-5.5"
or so.  Being older had allowed me to mature a little more than he was, but
even so, I was not as developed as most teens my age.  I heard him gasp
again, and he started getting weak in his knees at my touch.  I took my
thumb and played over the end a little, then worked my way up to his pubes.
They were oh soft feeling, even while wet, almost shiny and totally black
in color, compared to my own reddish-brown.  They were not thick, but they
were bunched all at the top of his crotch, telling me he had been
developing for a while but was still in the process of maturing.  I
remember my fingers ran through them, even though the soap had pretty much
been washed away by then.  I was looking, feeling, exploring him up close,
doing everything short of jacking him off, and thinking it was really cool.
The amount of time I spent doing it all was way past the amount of time Tim
spent with me, but that was okay.  This wasn't about trying to spend equal
time or effort, it was about exploring, and he didn't mind me exploring at
all.  I looked at him finally and saw that he was looking back down at me,
grinning.  There was no question I was much more sexual about it all than
he had been, but I didn't care at that point, because he enjoyed it as much
as I did.  I tugged on his raging member one last time, pushing him around
so I could do his back.  This time, he turned and spread his legs, but I
was much calmer, and I did a much better job at it as he had done me.  I
washed his butt, down in his crack and between his legs, and he spread his
legs extra wide to accept me there as well.  I remember even feeling his
butt hole a little, and giggled for no apparent reason.  He liked it
though, shaking his butt at me a little, before we both laughed and I
finally stood up.

	I turned him one last time to face me, grinning and giggling as he
was doing me the same way.  I leaned back against the wall, in full view of
him, reached down and pulled the skin back on my cock, kind of finishing up
what he really didn't do - probably didn't even know to do.  It was
everything I could do to keep from bursting out laughing when I saw the
look on his face.  As he watched me, his eyes bugged out and grew wide with
amazement as my crown appeared and, for the most part, looked just like
his.  When my skin retracted - if there is such a word considering the
raging boner I had stretching everything to the gills - it still covered me
back up and left some on the end.  He reached out then, touched me, pulled
it back again for himself like he had seen me do, obviously fascinated by
it.

	I knew then what would be cool for him, having done it a few times
and watched those same expressions cross Cody's face.  I stepped back ever
so slightly as he let go, and pushed his boner down to meet mine face to
face - or in this case, head to head - so they could sort of "kiss".  He
was so hard though, so stiff I couldn't keep it down completely, and I had
to get his help to hold it while I brought us together.  The only
difference though is I pulled my skin back as we touched again, before
letting it go and pulling it up and over his crown, engulfing him as far as
my skin would let me.  He gasped and pushed forward, making our crowns
press hard against each other.  He took over holding the end of my skin and
cirlced his fingers around it, clamping it down on his cock and pulling as
much from me as I would give him.  I gasped too, because he was feeling
everything about me, inside of me, and the sensations it sent through me
were electrifying.  We did this for what had to be 2-3 minutes before he
let go, looking up at me and grinning that silly grin of his, from ear to
ear.  He leaned up and whispered in my ear, "That is fucking awesome Sean!"
I giggled at his curse, not use to hearing it from him, then whispered in
his ear "I know!"

	We turned off the water and just stood there for a second, looking
at each other.  I was going to hug him almost, but instead I finally
mouthed the words 'Thank you' to him, and he immediately pushed a finger to
my lips, shaking his head, and whispered in my ear "We're not done yet."
He pulled the curtain back, grabbed a towel, and quickly dried me off, to
which I returned the favor.  We were both still hard as he turned and
climbed out of the tub, gently pulling me with him.  I grabbed my glasses
and we turned off the light, heading into the bedroom, where he also turned
the light off on the table while he dragged me over to the bed, still
unmade from the night before.  He climbed in, pulling me behind him, both
of us naked as the day we were born, surrounded by darkness.  When we got
in he pushed me on my back then climbed on top of me, staring me in the
face, that smile of his melting away all my worries I think.  He thrust and
ground us a little together, our cocks touching and grinding into each
other.  I grinned and whispered, "Who's raping who now?"

	He laughed. "Shuddup!"  He looked at me, then spoke, his voice
barely above a whisper, "You're not gonna tell anyone are you?"

	I was in shock.  "No way! Why would you ask me that?"

	He was embarrassed. "I dunno, I just thought..."  He let the trail
go at the end, but his eyes didn't stop looking at me.

	I grabbed his butt under the covers and pulled him into me hard and
just whispered, "No way Tim, no way will I tell anyone.  Besides," as I
pushed up to meet his thrust, "this feels too... awesome..."

	At that he closed his eyes and smiled, his mouth open a little as
we ground our groins together. I knew what I wanted to do, but again, that
family thing... I was scared, nervous, but I figured if I had come this
far, if HE had come this far with ME, then...

	"Tim?" He opened his eyes. "You're awesome bro, I really mean it."
I spoke.

	He whispered back, "You are too."

	I hesitated. "Y-you really w-want to feel it? Feel something good,
I mean?"

	He looked in my eyes, grinning again, but didn't say anything.  I
waited, adding "I promise, no raping, cross my heart."  He laughed, and
then nodded.  I gently pushed him to my side, onto his back, and I pulled
the covers down, exposing his middle again and the raging hot rod that
stood up, pointing to his belly.  I watched him the whole time, watched his
expression - if he gave me any hint or indication of hesitation, I was
going to stop, and even as I got the covers off of our feet, I hesitated -
still watching his reaction.  He gave me nothing, just the smile, and I was
about to stop when I felt him thrust at me ever so slightly underneath, and
I could feel his dick throbbing against me.  It was enough, so I went down
on him, taking him in my mouth slowly at first, just putting his head
inside my lips.

	He bucked ever so slightly, then I felt his hands on my head, and
for a split second I thought he might be trying to pull me away, but as he
got his grip, I instead felt him slowly push inside of me, his breathing
getting hard really fast.  He gasped as I felt him throb so hard against my
tongue, and I was forced to taste him, taste his rigidness.  At that point
I gave in and started dancing around, licking him up and down on the
inside, pulling back and dancing on his tip, my tongue moving in circles
taking him all in, kissing with his pee hole, sampling all the sweet taste
his cock would give me.

	I heard him finally exhale, whispering "Aaahhh
mmaaannnnnn... sshhhiiitttt, don't stop Sean... aaahhhh fuccckkkkkk...."
He was getting everything out of it I wanted him to.  At one point he
started thrusting into my mouth, so I started bobbing up and down on him.
I even moaned myself as he filled my mouth, swelling and pushing inside of
me.  In less than a minute I felt the surge building up inside of him, and
I felt him trying to pull my head back, pull himself out of me.  I refused,
I was committed to seeing him all the way through, and when it overtook
him, he heaved into me a huge eruption of cum like I had never seen
before. I knew I could cream a lot, and maybe it was just my imagination;
maybe it was because he was still so young in a sense, and was just gearing
up his maximum factory for the days to come.  Heck, maybe he hadn't jacked
off in a few days or something, but the point was he flooded me, and sucked
and licked all of it, milking his stiffness in me.  I played with his
scrotum, and pushed my fingers around his pubes as I went up and down.  I
went all the way down to his base, licking and sucking, slowly coming off
up to the tip just to repeat and do the same again. It had been ssooooo
long, I had forgotten what it was like, how it tasted, how it felt.  Tim's
cum was a little salty, but like mine was just as creamy as could be
expected.

	When he finally subsided into dry heaves, gasping for breath, he
lay still, totally exposed to me.  I just held him in my mouth till his
breathing got a little more regular, closing my eyes and savoring the
moment for myself I think.  I finally pulled off and turned my head toward
him, laying it on his belly, my right hand coming up and holding his
crotch, softly feeling and massaging everything around it.  I watched him
come down from his peak, a look of pure ecstasy covering his face.  I also
noticed off to the side how he had pulled on the sheets so hard at one
point that they came off one corner of the bed.  When he opened his eyes, I
smiled at him, nervous about what he would say, nervous about whether I had
went too far.

	He looked at me and grinned, and he had this expression that just
said it all.  "Well?" I asked him, "How was it?"

	He couldn't answer me, and I knew exactly how he felt.  I brought
my head up and kissed his belly button for some reason before moving up on
his chest.  "Talk to me bro, I have to know..."  My voice was shaky,
unsteady, but the words and the meaning were clear; it was from my heart,
and his response was going to mean everything to me.  He finally opened his
mouth, and said in a voice just above a whisper, "That was
so.... so... awesome Sean."

	I nodded and smiled. "You're okay with it? Honest?"

	He grinned back and then shifted and pulled me up to him, putting
both his arms and legs around me and holding me in the tightest, warmest
hug and embrace I think I had ever had. "Honest," he whispered in my ear.
I liked to have fallen into him with relief, and he knew it.  I whispered
back, "I'm glad bro, I was scared..."

	He hugged me tighter, shushing me, and then whispered back "You can
rape me anytime you want bro!"

	I giggled and we both laughed as I rose up and looked at his eyes.
"Tim, that's not raping.. I mean, you know that don't you?"

	He smiled and nodded.  "Yeah, I know Sean, I know... I don't care
what it is though, that was just so cool!"  He looked at me.  "You
swallowed me? You swallowed my cum?"

	I nodded, blushing, embarrassed.  "Yeah, you gave me something to
hold inside of me, something that was a part of you and is now a part of
me." I looked at him again and added, "To keep."

	He grinned.  "What was it like?"

	I thought about it for a minute. "It's like, well, like creamy and
sort of salty I guess. It's not like pee or anything, you know?"  He
nodded, so I went on. "I don't think I could ever have done it, you know,
it's kind of disgusting at first, but..."  He nodded again, waiting.  I saw
trust in those eyes, so I just told him. "Cody sort of talked me into it
once, so I just did it, not really sure, but I just did it. I tasted my own
first, and then I tasted his."  He grinned even bigger, and before he could
even ask the question I could see forming on his face, I just told
him. "Yeah, I sucked him, and he sucked me, but I haven't, like, I mean,
I'm not queer or -"

	He did it again; he shushed me, putting a finger to my lips. "I
don't care Sean, I know you, I trust you," he whispered. "Th-that was the
most awesome thing I've ever felt!"

	I smiled. "You liked it, huh?"  He nodded, and I asked him, "You
jack off, right?"

	"Oh yeah..." He kept smiling at me.  "But that was nothing - that
was nothing even fucking close to..."  His voice trailed off, and I just
nodded, knowing.  I finally broke from him and rolled over on my back,
pulling him close to me.  He wrapped his fingers around my dick though, and
started to jack me off.  I stopped him and pulled his ear close to my lips.
"You don't have to do it Tim, what I did bro, I did for you, that's all."

	He looked at me and smiled. "Shut up you dork. I..." he paused. "I
don't think I can suck you though, I mean..."

	I smiled.  "You don't have to, you don't need to."

	At that he squeezed little Sean really hard, making me gasp and
draw my breath in as he whispered again, "I told you to shut up... let me
finish!"  I said nothing else as he let off of some of the pressure.  "I
want to, I want to do it to you, I just don't know if I can right now,
that's all, not now anyway... but I can milk you dry, you know? I WANT to
do that, I want to play with you, jack you off..."

	He did just that - he played with me for a while, and I just lay
there, drinking him in, enjoying it. He lifted himself up on one elbow, and
whispered to me "Turn the light on a minute, Sean."  I reached out and did
as he requested, watching him get down and look at me up close.  "Damn,
cool, you ARE just like me, I mean, when I pull this all the way back."  He
looked at me and I nodded.  "What you did, in there, in the shower... I
almost creamed us both in there! That was so hot!  It must be cool having
all this extra skin and stuff."  I giggled, but didn't say anything.  He
asked me, "Did you and Cody do that to?"

	I hesitated then just nodded.  He grinned then got up on top of me
again, looking down in my eyes.  "I want to ask you something."  He was
being all serious, so I just nodded.  "You're not gay, right?"

	I looked at him, really close for a moment; it had come down to
this moment, but I wasn't willing to give that up, wasn't willing to face
that yet. I whispered "I don't think so bro, I mean, I do stuff, I mess
around some, but... gay, is like..." and I stopped.

	He nodded.  "I know Sean, that's okay.  It's like, umm, like really
hardcore and stuff."  I nodded watching him.  "Then tell me something
else."  He waited and I nodded again, before he continued. "Have you ever
butt-fucked anyone? Did you and Cody, like, do 'it'?"

	I giggled and shook my head, whispering "No bro. I'm still a
virgin!"  He laughed, and I couldn't tell it exactly, but he seemed to
relax a lot more, being more at ease.  "Good," was all he said before
pulling me into another big hug.  After a moment I pushed him up so I could
say something to him.  "Tim?"

	"Yeah?"

	"Um, I don't know if I can say this right... like, I've tried it
before, but you know how I screw things up sometimes..." He smiled, and
waited on me.  "This, I mean, all of this, as far as I'm concerned, it's
like... it's like just being curious, but being curious with someone you
trust, you know?"  He smiled big time, so I added "Someone you love, too,
not like a sexy love, just, you know..."

	"Yeah, I know Sean.  I think that's cool, I think that's a good way
to describe it."  He looked at me again. "You didn't screw that up, that
was perfect."  I smiled back.  He added, "And yeah, I love you too, you
dork!"

	We both giggled and he stretched over me, turning off the light
again, whispering "Thanks for letting me look again."

	I whispered back as he settled into a position and started pumping
me up and down, "Anytime bro, you can look at me any time you want..."  He
giggled, and then started to really get serious on me, really jacking me
off like a pro almost, and I could tell the difference.  All this time,
through the serious moments and fun moments both, I had been holding back,
not ready to let go.  Now it seemed like I wasn't going to make it last any
longer.  "Tim, I'm going to cum..."

	He giggled and whispered back, "Well, I hope so!"  If I had not
been getting up to where I was that would have probably broke the ice and I
probably would have been laughing my ass off.  As it was though, I could
feel it.  You know how sometimes when you jack off, you can feel it when it
pulses through you and stuff?  It seemed to me that whenever someone did it
to me, though, you know - did it FOR me - that feeling came from somewhere
deeper inside.  I could feel that little tug in my belly button, and it was
like something connected all the way down to the bottom of my nuts.  It
would make me gasp, and I realized right at the last second only enough to
throw some of the covers back that had crept up on us.  Tim was milking me
steadily, using his thumb to play with my crown when it appeared, and when
I pulled my feet down into the bed, my legs spread wider and my thigh
muscles contracted together.  I sunk my hips down as far into the mattress
as they would go, and then it was like the whole connection electrified - I
was erupting, and man was I erupting, I had gobs going everywhere up and
down my chest, my belly, onto Tim's hand and fingers; I was gasping, trying
not to cry out.  Oh man, I had never been jacked off that good before, not
cummed like that in a long time, and I had never creamed as hard at one
time.  Tim giggled, but he kept doing it, kept pumping me, but making it
softer and gentler as I gave up everything I had.

	When I finished, I collapsed and watched him, smiling.  He grinned
at me, still holding me as I started to go soft, and then finally pulling
his hand away.  He reached for some tissues nearby and started to clean me
up some.  I took some of the tissues and helped him as he whispered "Wow,
and I thought I cummed a lot!"

	I grinned at him. "You did."

	He grinned back as he reached for the seemingly last gob right
under my belly button.  He looked at it for a moment, and then looked at
me, his finger swirling in it.  I shook my head. "No, you don't have to - "
and then, to my horror and shock, he just lifted it up to his lips and
sucked his finger.  I could tell he was trying to decide, and I just lay
there, frozen, unable to move.  Finally he looked at me and nodded his head
slowly, whispering "You're right Sean. It seems like it would be
disgusting, but it's really not." He kind of moved it around his mouth a
little before swallowing it. "It's... It's like you said, kind of creaming,
salty but... yeah, cool..."

	I shook my head, grinning, as I whispered to him, "Sheesh, is there
anything else you're going to do to put me in shock tonight doofus?"

	He shrugged his shoulders.  "I dunno, probably..."  With that he
bent down and took my cock inside of his mouth, making me suck my gut in.
I felt him tasting me all over with his tongue, even sucking a little as he
held me inside of him briefly.  If I had not cummed so hard just moments
before, I would have been in heaven I think, with a full boner again.  I
didn't get hard though, didn't really have the time to as he let me go and
popped back off, grinning at me, asking, "Is that a shocker too?"

	"I thought... You s-said..."

	Again he shushed me, whispering "Shut up Sean, you think too
much..."  With that he climbed back into my side, and we cuddled up, him
laying his head again on my shoulder, and looking at me with bright, happy
eyes as we pulled the cover up over us.

	"Sean?"

	"Yeah bro?"

	"I know why you and Cody were so close now."  He smiled as I looked
at him.

	"Yeah? What do you mean?"

	"Because I know how close I feel to you right now," and with that
he buried his face against me and hugged me tight.

	---------

	Thus ends another chapter.  I kind of hope you guys enjoyed it.
Take care everyone, okay?  Any comments send them to me at
EKidKy@hotmail.com

	-- EKidKy