Date: Sun, 22 May 2005 00:53:32 -0400
From: Jay Kool <jaykool74@hotmail.com>
Subject: My So Called Life - Chapter 16

"My So Called Life" – Chapter Sixteen by Jay Kool (jaykool74@hotmail.com)

"David Comes Out"
--------------
David's journal...

	For once in my life things most things going great.  My boyfriend
Ty and I are getting along well.  I've finally made it past the point of
pushing him away for fear that I will hurt him.  I have even accepted the
fact that his mother knows about us and I know that she loves me like her
only son Ty.  It's so nice to have an environment where I don't have to
hide my feelings or who I am for fear of losing my family or friends.  The
only problem is that my parents have no clue that I'm gay and in love with
the cutest boy in the world, but there is no way I am telling them until I
am in college at the soonest.  It will help minimize any repercussions from
coming out.  It's hard to kick someone out on the street when they don't
live in your house.  I could still lose my family but I couldn't deal with
that as well as living on the streets; there is only so much that I can
handle.
	I can't believe that I actually started to keep a journal at the
request of Tyler.  He told me that it would help me work out my feelings
more effectively than bottling them up inside of me over two months ago.
He told me he doesn't want to get splattered when I explode, he thinks he's
funny and sometimes he is but I think he is just cute and adorable.  I'm so
surprised I can keep from doting over him in school, talk about self
control.  When we are in a room alone I practically rip his clothes off and
rape him.  Our love making is so passionate; I truly doubt that Romeo and
Juliet could have ever had sex as good as we have.  Yes I know I have a
dirty mind, oh well it's with me for life so I mind as well enjoy it.
	Tyler will be going to New York to attend his father's wedding as
the best man; I bet he'll look extremely hot.  I wish I could attend as his
date, spending the weekend with him alone other than the wedding.  Maybe if
I suggested it to his mother she'd find a way to get me to go with him,
maybe work it out with his father seeing how Tyler and he do not have the
greatest relationship.  I don't care how it would work out for me to go, I
just want to go and get my freak on with Tyler on the dance floor.  Okay
maybe just dance sensual and sexy with him – freak out the old people.
That would be so cool.  Well it's time for bed, write you later.

	With that David went to bed peacefully dreaming of making out with
Tyler and dancing with him at a wedding reception, using past memories from
the only wedding he ever attended of a cousin that grew up in Columbus,
Ohio.  The city was boring and smaller than he had imagined but the
reception was a blast.


Reality: In David's room.

	Most teenage girls and boys think far enough ahead to hid things
from their parents that you wouldn't want them to see.  Perhaps David's
tribute of his love for Ty should have been locked away instead of sitting
on the night table beside his bed.  Perhaps his parents should respect his
privacy and not read his journal without his permission.

	"David, what is the meaning of this?"  David's father is gently
shaking him trying to wake him.
	"Huh?  What are you talking about?"  David groggily inquires.  A
flash of terror and embarrassment spread thru his body quicker than
gasoline lights on fire as he notices his dad holding his journal.
	"I've been reading your journal.  You and the little faggot Tyler
have been fucking around."  His father's voice was rising in conjunction
with nostrils starting to flare and his face and neck catching on fire.
	"It's not what you think..." David started before he was cut off by
his dad again.
	"Explain what the hell you mean by ripping his clothes off and
barely holding yourself back from raping him.  I suppose this is just a
phase you are going through, there ain't no way you could seriously love
that little runt."
      David just realized that his dad was holding him by the front of the
shirt so he was suspended out of bed and that he was shaking really badly.
He realized it was now or never to come out with the truth, it was the
perfect opening even if it was going as he had planned.  David tried to
speak but his body would not allow him to say anything.
      "I suppose you want to get married and tell the whole fucking world
that my son is a gay wad.  That he loves a little faggot who can't stop
tripping over himself because no one else could love a twerp like that."
      Something about his dad's words were scary, but they were also
enticing David to stick up for Ty.  It took so long to finally get where
they were at to give it up because his dad didn't approve.  "I love him
dad.  I'm gay so get over it it's my life."
  David was slapped hard as he uttered the last word before he was flung
from him bed on the floor.
      "No fucking faggot is living in my house.  I'll kill you first before
I let you make a disgrace out of me."  David's dad yelled as he lunged
toward him grabbing him and throwing him up against the wall as he started
to punch David in the midsection hard.  He meant business and David was
going to pay.  "Give up your faggy ways or die"
      "I can't..."  David was punched so hard in the head that he passed
out, crashing against his desk knocking the computer monitor on the floor
as he fell.  That didn't stop his dad from kicking him repeatedly, once he
hit the floor.  If David's mother hadn't come into the room to find out
what the loud noise was about, he may have been killed by his father.  She
pulled him back telling him that if he hit David one more time, he would go
to jail and lose her forever.
      She knew David was gay but knew how her husband was and could never
tell him.  She hoped and prayed that David would be out of the house when
his father found out.  She feared he would be severely hurt or killed by
his father finding out.  She also knew she couldn't trust her husband Mark
once he was out of her sight and already called the cops when she heard him
yelling earlier.  She told him to go downstairs while she would take care
of David.  The cops were waiting outside as Mark came down the stairs and
was arrested when he answered the door.
      David was taken to the hospital in an ambulance.  Had his mother
tried to take him, he would've died in the car due to the sustained head
injuries and internal bleeding from the beating his father had given him.
David suffered five broken ribs, a punctured lung, internal bleeding, a
broken nose, a concussion and was in a coma due to falling into shock.
David's mother had to make the hardest telephone call of her life, she
called Tyler's mother to relay the bad news from the hospital.  She had
donated blood for David and was disobeying doctors orders by getting up to
make the phone call, but she knew she wouldn't be able to live with herself
if David died without giving his first true love the opportunity to say
goodbye.


Tyler's point of view:

	I finally caught up on all of the homework that I missed prior to
break, even though it was hard to concentrate because everything reminded
me of David.  I think I love him more than life itself, but like mom told
me, I could get held back if I'm not careful and then he wouldn't be in any
of my classes.  Well it's bedtime and I'm getting ready to drift off to
sleep when the phone rings.  Who would be calling at 11:48 PM on a Sunday
evening?  Mom answered the phone; it stopped ringing past the second ring.
The first ring actually brought me out of my daze that I was in.  Just as I
was drifting back to sleep again, mom walks in the room fully dressed
turning on the light above my bed.
	"Mom what's wrong?"  She is slight shivering and pale almost like
she has the flu or something.  Did this have something to do with the phone
call?  Is grandma alright?  I knew she was pretty sick around Christmas.
	"Ty, I have some bad news for you..." she was whispering and
trailed off into silence as she looked down at the ground.  It was like she
was expecting the words to say were written there for her to read.  I
wanted to say something but thought it was best to be patient and let her
tell me when she was ready in her own words.  I expected her to say that
grandma had died, I never expected to hear her say, "David is in the
intensive care unit at the hospital, get dressed so we can go visit him
before emergency surgery is performed.  That was his mother on the phone
and she knew how close you two were."  Well I didn't actually hear any
words after "intensive care".
	My mother had to snap me out of my shock into getting dressed so we
could make it to see him before his surgery.  We drove in silence to the
hospital or so it seemed.  My mind would not let me hear any sounds; it was
like I went deaf upon hearing the bad news about David.  I guess my mother
was trying to comfort me and give me hope for the best possible outcome,
but my mind wouldn't let me hear a thing.
      We arrived at the hospital and made our way to David's room and I
almost fainted when I saw the condition that he was in.  His face was
bruised and cut; he had a breathing tube, IVs running out of his arm, a
heart monitor and was unconscious.  I fell to my knees grabbing his hand
with hysterical crying and tears falling from my eyes.  The pain of his
condition seared my heart and racked my brain.  Why did God have to do this
to him?  What the hell happened?  Please God I give my life for his any day
any time.
  Take me but let him be.
      I had to be pried from his hand so they could wheel him out of the
room to surgery.  My mom actually lifted me to my feet wrapping me in a
bear hug as I convulsed uncontrollably with David's mom enclosing me in a
circle.  Here I was the man and I'm not strong enough to support his mother
through an extremely difficult and trying time.  I want to feel guilty for
that, but I can't.  The pain won't let me feel any guilt.  I was watching
my life slip away before my eyes, I can't live without David.
      The next thing I knew I was in a waiting room with our moms.  It
seemed like a surreal dream where nothing makes any sense and time is lost.
I think I finally understand the weird painting of the distorted clocks and
watches that always seems to be in the college bookstores.  "David, you and
your mother should go home; there is nothing you can do."
      "There is no way I'm leaving.  Without David I am dead and I would
gladly give my life without thought to save his.  Nothing short of my dying
will force me to abandon his side when he is in his greatest need."
      "I guess I should call the school to tell them that you and David
will not be in today" my mother said as I stared down David's mother.  She
finally relented on trying to be nice and remained quiet.  I hadn't
realized but it was already six in the morning.
      While my mother was away making phone calls to the school district, a
doctor came in the room to tell us that he didn't know if David was going
to make it.  That the surgery did not go as expected and that the next
forty-eight hours were crucial to his survival.  I guess I actually passed
out and hit the floor or something because I woke up to a doctor, my mom,
David's mom and a nurse trying to bring me to consciousness.
	My mom told them that I seem to have a history of passing out when
I receive bad news or get a really good scare.  The doctor told my mother
that I should be checked out to ensure that it wasn't masking a bigger
problem and she told him that she already went through all of that.  I
asked why they were fussing over me instead of David who really needed
their help.  We were let into the intensive care unit room where they had
David about two hours after the news.  We could only hope and pray that God
would take care of him and bring him through.


If you like this story series so far, you may want to read my other fiction
story series:

(They are probably archived in a previous year or so, please do a find on
them...)
Gay --> high school --> Music Store Teens
Bi --> college --> College Firsts

Any non-flamer feedback is welcome, email me at jaykool74@hotmail.com I
will be creating a mailing list for chapters as they are released.  I admit
that it has been a while since the last installment but I've been so busy
with work and school that I haven't had time to write until recently.