Date: Sun, 27 Jan 2002 00:33:32 EST
From: SammySagitarius@aol.com
Subject: SoccerLocker6 - in OfMyOwn

I was fainting. I saw Brandon's face, still in pure agony, look me dead
in the eye. He thought for a split second as to wether he should come
back for me. He turned the other way and chased the one who held his
future, which was written innocently onto an old, damaged peice of
notebook paper. He ran the way I had just come. He was nearing my locker,
I could hear every running footstep. I heard him call out a name, but I
didn't hear who. I was unconscious...

I woke up to see the school nurse. She was a quite unattractive. None the
less, she didn't really matter. What mattered was getting out of the
Nurse's office. I simply stood up. Bad move. I asked what happened to
Brandon. She said, "Who?". I said, "Brandon. He was chasing someone." The
nurse didn't know who I was talking about. After the longest 15 minutes
ever, I got to leave. I walked through the halls. I passed the gym door.
I remembered Ryan giving me his underwear. I remembered my first kiss
with Brandon. I walked up the stairs, and made it to the 2nd floor where
I passed my social studies class. I remembered how I had to make a daring
escape to retreive that note. I walked pass my friend Lindsey's locker. I
remembered having the note latched out of my hand. I walked down the
hall, nearing my own locker. I thought back to Denny and Matt and
Brandon. As I got to my locker, I saw the note sticking out of the side.
I started to walk quicker. As I got to my locker, I reached out and
grabbed that paper. I opened it slowly. I finally got to read what
Brandon had wanted me to hear:

Sammy,
       I'm very sorry. The coach gave me a choice. My sport or my love.
It's my life, Sam. I want both, but I have to decide. Ryan was talking to
me earlier about you. He told me that you've suffered a lot. He said that
one day he read your journal when he got into the room before everyone
else after lunch. He knew about you all along. That's why he still said
Hi to you in the hallway. He knew how bad you were hurting. Don't be
angry with him. He said that he was glad he found out some things. He
said he couldn't have learned to like you if he hadn't known about you. I
was talking to Kevin, without using your name of course. He said that if
you like someone, it shouldn't matter who they are. I like you, Sam. I've
waited my whole life to have someone let me know why I was born. Sam, you
are why I'm here. We are ment to know eachother, to be close. I told
coach this morning that I'm quitting the team. I'll worry about my
parents later. Please forgive me. Write me back.

That was the first part of the letter. In pen at the bottom, he had
apparently added something in later. It read:

Sam, Jay stole the note.

(Let me tell you, Jay has been my personal enemy since the 6th grade.
He'd have loved to get some of that info -- okay, back to the note)

I ran down the hall after him, I yelled for Denny to stop him, and he
did. We got the note, obviousely. Denny knows everything now. Matt is
going to call you tonight. Tell him whatever you want. Later.

***

So that's the note. How am I doing now? Well I'm 19 now. Taking a break
from school. I'll try college NEXT year. As far as Brandon and I, we
started going out together. We never made it official, we didn't want the
world to know. We still talk, but our relationship has ended. Matt,
tragically, was killed my junior year in a car accident. I attended the
funeral with Brandon. Denny, he got a scholarship for Track and he's a
freshmen in a California college. He's written me once. He's doing just
fine. Mary and I now share an apartment. She's been helping me write
these stories. SHe knows all about everything now, we get along great.
We're like Will & Grace. James... he's just your average stoner. Jay
moved on to a college for Broadcasting, if you were interested. My friend
Lindsey has kept in touch since school ended. She, too, is taking a break
fom school. However, her break is in Florida. Ryan is the interesting
one. He became a really good friend of mine after Matt died. We've been
really close. He's known all about me since middle school, since he snuck
that peak at my journal. I still have the breifs he gave me in the locker
room, but he'd blush if he knew that. I haven't ever came out publically
to friends or family, just a select few. I really miss high school. It's
not often you can have such an adventuresome day anywhere else but high
school. I'm looking at wallet-sized photos, all framed, sitting on my
computer right now. I'm going to end this tale of my first true love by
blowing kisses to those photos... Brandon, Ryan, Matt, Denny... Thank you
for giving me my story.

~~~~~~~~
EVERYTHING ABOVE THIS LINE IS FICTION
(that should prevent any confusion)

I hope this ending was okay... I thought about some other stuff, but I
really think the note was a sweet and enlightening way to do it... I'll
try some PORN-writing later... it will not be in the Of-My-Own directory,
so you'll have to keep a look out for it...