Date: Sat, 3 May 2014 00:15:13 -0400 (EDT)
From: Erik Pruett <erik.pruett@aol.com>
Subject: Please Don't Go 10 (Young Friends)

The regular warnings apply. Don't read this if it offends you, or if it's
illegal to do so.

Hello. Thanks to everyone who's written me so far, I really do read every
message and appreciate the regular correspondence I've developed with a few
of you. A special hello goes out to a wonderful Russian lady and her lovely
wife in the big bad city. Congratulations on the marriage. Having said
that, it's on the the next chapter. Enjoy.

---

	Every year Jaime's family goes on a trip just before the end of the
summer holiday and the beginning of the new school year. Usually they
decide upon the beaches in California, and I've always been invited along.
Jaime's father is a very successful lawyer, so money has never been an
issue for them. His family thinks nothing of burning through thousands just
for a week along the shore. But being that this was our last summer before
high school, Jaime's parents thought we ought to celebrate with a 'special
vacation'.

	Central Texas isn't known as a hub of culture and refinement, and
while Austin is quite a bit more dynamic than the rest of the Lone Star
state, it's hardly a multicultural locale. One thing that Texas does have
in spades, though, is Spanish speakers. Jaime never made more than B's and
C's in Spanish class, but I always made easy A's in honors Spanish. In
restaurants when we'd all go out together, I'd often speak Spanish with the
native speakers. I'd always loved the Latin influences I discovered after
moving to Texas from Hawaii, and given my propensity for the language,
Jaime's parents decided that we'd be vacationing in Spain. Needless to say,
Jaime and I were beside ourselves with excitement.

	If we'd known then how our week in Spain would play out, we might
have felt differently.

---

	Ten minutes to midnight, our flight leaves at seven tomorrow
morning and still neither Jaime nor I have even begun packing yet for the
trip. For hours he's been on the phone chatting with Veronica, who's been
comically distraught over the thought of sitting in Austin while he and I
are in Spain. I've been sitting on the bed reviewing my Spanish books and
trying my best to ignore their conversation. It makes my head ache.

	"It's only gonna' be a week, baby", I hear Jaime say for the
thousandth time tonight.

	I roll my eyes and sigh. Honestly, I think to myself, how does a
person get so upset over a week apart? She's far too dramatic. But then,
would I be so much different if I was the one being left behind? I find
myself seething with jealousy every time Jaime and Veronica go out on a
date, and he isn't even mine. Maybe I'm passing judgments a bit too
quickly.

	I return to my Spanish textbooks and Shakira songs, feeling a bit
guilty at having been short with Veronica, if only in my head.

	"Come on, baby. It ain't gonna' be that bad!" he says, also for the
thousandth time, dropping himself backward onto the bed in
frustration. He's just in boxers and a tank top.

	I can't help but be distracted by the sight of his thighs, strong
and tanned, all but completely exposed. Every day for the past two months
of summer vacation, I've been acquainting myself more and more with the
details of Jaime's body. From the strong thighs to his tight abdomen, his
broad chest to his muscular back, his round glutes and powerful arms. Every
part of him has begun to fill out, tighten up, reflecting more and more the
athlete Jaime is. And though I've finally caught up to him in height, the
two of us standing taller than most of the other guys in school, my body
has remained slender, albeit more athletic than it had before the start of
the summer holiday. I have to wonder if he thinks about how intimately he's
come to know my body the way I think about how I've come to know his. We've
caressed and tasted one another at least one hundred times just in these
past two months. I could identify the taste of Jaime's seed as easily as I
could vanilla ice cream or roast beef. His smell is to me as distinctive as
any cologne, and I could identify the feeling of his skin blindfolded. But
for all of that familiarity, I'm still no closer to possessing his heart,
the way he possesses mine, than when he and I began our relationship, if
you can even call it that. He whispers the sweetest things to me when we're
together, kisses me tenderly, holds me tightly against him every
night... but it's not real. Not the way I want it to be, need it to be.

	I'm not stupid. I know that I shouldn't be involving myself in
this. It's not fair to me, or even to him. It's wrong even, to allow him to
betray Veronica. I know I should tell him that I can't maintain this way,
but after so many years waiting and hoping, having any part of Jaime is
better than just having his friendship. A few times I've even tried to
resist, tried to tell him how I really feel and what I really crave from
him, but the words have always faded before leaving my mouth.

	"You want to help me start packing?" Jaime asks, though it takes me
a few seconds to realize that the question was addressed to me.

	"Sure", I reply with a shrug. I put my things down and start going
about the process of helping Jaime decide upon which shirts, shorts, and
boxers to pack. His wardrobe is hardly varied; almost all of it is American
Eagle boxers and socks, shirts and shorts from Underarmor, and dirty
athletic shoes.

	"I'm really looking forward to the trip", Jaime chimes in as he
folds the clothing I toss to him and shoves it into his suitcase.

	"Yeah man, me too."

	"It's gonna' be so cool, partying in Spain!"

	"Don't think we'll be doing much partying, dummy. We're fourteen."

	"No way. Don't you watch the movies? Europe is like one big party,
all the time."

	I roll my eyes, unable to muster the ardor for this
conversation. Another unfortunate side effect of this ongoing love triangle
we're involved in: in addition to getting short with Veronica, more and
more lately I've been finding myself at odds with Jaime over the tiniest
things. Where once I would joke and laugh with him, now I shut down. I feel
ridiculous, like a moody girl on her period, but I can't stop myself.

	I sigh.

	"You okay?" he asks, and I realize that I've been staring into
space.

	"Yeah, I'm fine", I mumble.

	"Liar", he responds. His tone is playful, but that's
misleading. He's prying. Normally I would just begin playing the part of
the happy best friend, but for whatever reason, tonight the urge just to be
honest swells up in me. The words spill out before I've even processed
them.

	"I'm the liar? I'm not the asshole splitting his time between his
girlfriend and his... gosh, I don't even know what to call myself. Your
sideline? Your plan B? You tell the both of us that you're in love after
we're done blowing you, but I'm the liar? What are you then?

	His facial expression, deer-in-the-headlights, speaks volumes. I
immediately regret having opened my mouth in the first place. "I'm your
best friend, Sash.... you're my best friend. And I do love you --" I cut
him off.

	"Shut up!" I scream. "God damn you! Shut up." I know there are
tears already running down my face; my body has an extraordinary talent for
betraying me. "You are such a fucking jerk, it's unbelievable!" I grab a
handful of shirts from his drawer and throw them at him. He doesn't even
attempt to dodge them.

	"Sasha, calm down", he says to me in an even, gentle tone. This is
what I hate the most: he can always remain patient and soft, no matter what
I do. Even when I'm raging at him, telling him exactly what he deserves to
hear, he treats me so gingerly that my fire is doused and I lose the
strength my anger provides me.

	"No, I'm not going to calm down", I spit the words out of my mouth
like venom. "Do you have any idea how horrible you are? You can't keep
doing this! Veronica doesn't deserve that..."

	My voice fades and silence reassumes sovereignty over our room. I'm
breathless from my outburst. Jaime's staring at me, I'm staring at the
ground. This is always the next step; first comes anger, then the outrage,
then embarrassment. And next...

	"Sasha, I don't want to hurt you..."

	"But you do!" I shout. "You hurt me every fucking day!"

	"But I don't want to! You just don't get it..."

	I roll my eyes. Scoff. "What? What don't I get, Jaime? That you're
so selfish about getting your dick wet that you'll string Vee and I along
shamelessly? That you're too much of a jerk to even tell her?"

	I'm aware of what a prick I'm being, what a drama queen. Jaime and
his family took me in after the accident and have kept me since my father
has been away in recovery. They've kept me fed and cared for. He's shared
his bed with me for ages. And if I only had the integrity, I could just
refuse sharing myself with him. But integrity is a much quieter voice than
desire.

	"Don't you get that this isn't easy for me either?" his voice
finally begins to rise. "It ain't like I woke up and decided I'd fuck over
my best friend. I know what you want, Sash. I've known since we were
twelve. You think I'd be sleeping with you if I didn't want it too?

	I'm breathless, helplessly caught someplace between fury, sorrow,
surprise, lust. He never fails to put me off balance. If ever there was a
reason to hate him, that would be it.

	"If you want me, why won't you just take me?!" I roar, no longer
able to muster the ardor for anger. I'm just desperate.

	I drop to my knees in front of him and start to sob. A second later
he's kneeling beside me, arms wrapped around me. He presses my face into
his chest and rocks me.

	"It's not that easy, Sash. Don't you understand? I told you
once... I can't.. I can't be gay. I just can't. I love you and I want you,
but we could never be together that way. People can never find out. Think
about what would happen if they did."

	"I don't care about people", I croack softly, "I just want you. All
of you. I love you Jaime. I've loved you for such a long time and it's so
goddamn exhausting."

	"Oh Sasha... I know what you're thinking, but there's not going to
be a happy ending for us. Life's not like that. We wouldn't just get to be
happy."

	He's right, and I know he's right. We'd never be accepted together,
not by his parents or by our friends. School would be Hell. He's absolutely
right. But hearing those words burns so terribly. I push him off me and sit
back down on the bed.

	"If you won't take me, why won't you just let me be?" I ask,
pouting.

	He sits down beside me, begins kissing along my neck. When his hand
slips beneath the waistband of my sweatshorts and underwear and begins to
stroke along the bare skin of my ass, I have to whimper.

	"I can't have you in public, but when we're alone I can make you
mine", he whispers into my ear before nibbling my earlobe between his front
teeth. I shiver.

	"J-Jaime, we've... got to pack", I attempt to protest. We both know
it's futile. His middle finger slides between my cheeks, finds my hole and
begins to massage. I moan loudly. The finger is wet and feeling is
electrifying.

	"I still haven't done it with Veronica yet", he whispers. "I wanted
to lose my virginity with the person I love most" My heart is breaking, and
as he finished whispering his finger suddenly presses a bit hard and sinks
halfway into my hole. I shout.

	"I can't... please..."

	Jaime presses his finger the rest of the way into me and again I
shout out again. It's a sensation I've never experienced before, a pleasure
I never realized I could feel. I whimper again softly as his other hand
pulls the sweatshorts and trunks off of me. He lies me on my back, spreads
my legs and sits himself between them. My dick is throbbing, already
drooling precum.

	"Ready for another finger?" He asks. I groan and shudder, shake my
head yes.

	His middle finger already buried inside of me, next he places his
ring finger against my hole and forces it all the way in beside the other
in one hard, swift motion. I cry out in pain.

	"Shhh... just relax, okay baby? Just relax, it'll feel better." I
want to tell him not to call me baby, the name he's already given
Veronica. But then the two fingers inside of me start massaging in a
circular motion inside of me. All I can do is moan.

	His fingers work circles inside of me for what feels like
ages. Slowly, all the tension and resistance within me crumbles away. I
relax and succumb. Soon my body is squirming with pleasure as his fingers
make circles more and more quickly.

	And then it happens.

	He slides them out almost all the way, then thrusts them back in
all the way to the knuckle. I've never moaned more loudly in all my
life. My eyes go wide.

	"Do you like that?" he asks in a husky voice.

	"More", is all I can manage as a reply.

	He begins fingering me again. At first he takes it slow, taking a
few seconds each time to slide them out before thrusting them back in, but
then the tempo grows faster and faster. Soon he's fingering me aggressively
while my head rolls from side to side and my throbbing hardness jumps and
leaks precum all over my smooth belly. The pleasure builds and builds to
unendurable heights without orgasm. Finally he fingers my ass so hard that
he forces an orgasm from me. My dick blasts load after load of cum all over
my stomach, chest, a load or two even splatters over my face. I scream with
pleasure and the world around me blacks out.

---

	When I wake up, I'm naked beneath the covers, cuddled gingerly atop
Jaime's naked body. He's got one hand stroking my hair, the other stroking
my ass. It feels so nice that I nearly fall back asleep, but then I realize
we still haven't packed.

	"Jaime?"

	"Good morning babydoll", Jaime whispers before kissing my forehead.

	"W-what time is it?" I ask, blushing. "How long have I been
asleep?"

	"Just half an hour or so. You sorta' fainted when we, you know..."

	"Oh gosh", I grumble, hiding my face in his chest. He spanks my
bare ass suddenly, making me jump. "Hey!"

	He giggles. "Sorry, couldn't help it. You've got such a sexy ass,
Sash."

	My cheeks are burning scarlet the way they used to when I was
younger and he would smile at me, directly at me. I feel so childish, but
in a positive way. Something feels different.

	"I packed our junk and cleaned you up, by the way. Figured you'd be
a little exhausted when you finally work up, so I just took care of it."

	"Thanks", I mumble. I lay my head back down, gently kiss his
chest. In the back of my mind, the usual hurricane of thoughts is raging,
but for once I'm able to let it go. Everything feels so lovely, I just want
to melt into the moment and have my peace, if only shortly.

	"Sash?"

	"Yeah?"

	"I meant what I said, you know. I really haven't slept with Vee."

	My heart skips a beat. "Jaime..."

	"You're the person I love most in the world. And I want you to be
the one I lose my virginity with. I want us to lose ours together." I move
myself up a bit, press my lips into his and kiss him passionately, tears in
my eyes.

	It isn't the faerie tale ending I used to dream about. It doesn't
mean that he'll give up Veronica and take me as his one and only. It
doesn't mean that anything is any better than it was before the fight. But
he loves me most, and that means more to me than anything else ever could.

	And so I fall asleep cuddled against his chest, my arms around his
neck, my face resting between his neck and shoulder, the two of us nude,
skin to skin. And for the first time in longer than I care to remember, my
chest doesn't feel so hollow.