Date: Wed, 1 Jun 2005 00:07:33 EDT From: SAGANMN@aol.com Subject: Second Chance "Hold it right there son!" I kept running. Fuck Fuck Fuck! Ain't this a bitch?! I keep running in an unknown direction. Why? Because the fuckin cops are after me. I didn't do it and I didn't pull the trigger I'm not a fuckin crim. SLAM! I struggle to break free but the fat cop has me pinned. Fuckin nailed by porky pig. The fat fuck came out of nowhere and jumped me. Now my life is over. Not even fourteen years old and it's gone. I wanna die but not steamrolled by this porker. The cop handcuffs me without saying shit but maybe 'cuz he's smart enough to know I won't say shit. I'm not a snitch but now knowing where I'm going I might have to change my mind. Should I? Lets wait and see maybe it's a curfew catch. Only my third this month. Porky picks me up and pushes me to the cop car. I feel his fat hand going over my body and into my pocket. "get out you fag" I told him but he keeps groping me and squeezes my nuts. Bitch that hurts now I gotta pee. "Ok into the car Anthony" Fatboy pushed me into the car and slammed the door. They got in and started looking me up on the computer using my school ID. I can see the screen from the back and big red letters said Wanted by county for murder-2. Oh shit they know. Yea my life is over, can I die now? Who am I? Anthony James Stevens. A once normal teenager that had the wrong friends and now they turned on me. Growing up on the streets is hard enough when you have to watch your back but I guess I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm a pretty big kid for my age I guess and fast as hell. If porky wasn't hiding behind the garbage cans I know I would have lost them. "Stevens!" the cop yells. I look up at him. "You're going to jail" No shit fatso. Off to juvi we go. No cars on the streets at 3 in the morning so the cop drove fast as he could. A left and another left and we went down inside the juvi center, the door closed and that was the last time I will see freedom. Gone in a click of the lock. "Well mister Stevens it's such a pleasure to see you again this month. What is it this time?" That's hamburger and everyone knows it. This fucker stands over 6-5 but he's real nice at first. That is until you piss him off. I stand 5-6 so he's got almost a foot over me and over a hundred pounds. Before I answered Hamburger old Porky said I was wanted on a murder rap and that changed everything. "Ok Stevens lets go over to the holding cell. It's a murder rap so things are gonna be different now." In the cell I go and the door slams shut. Damn I still have to piss but the cuffs are still on me. Maybe I can... Lets see here... Nope can't reach around enough to pull my shorts up to get my dick out. It's starting to hurt and I can't hold it much longer. Someones at the door again. "Stevens turn around back to the door" I do. The door opens and someone takes the cuffs off. "Turn around" and I'm greeted by another big black dude with a scar on his face. Looks like scarface with a badge alright but I'm not gonna say shit. "Come with me" I got taken to the bad boys intake room. "Ok strip kid" I stand there for a second cuz I've never been in here before. "You gonna strip or am I gonna strip you?" I start taking off my shirt then my shoes leaving my shorts for last. I wasn't wearing any underwear and hoped I could keep my shorts. Nope 2 others grabbed my arms and scarface pulled off my shorts. Man I felt so fuckin small right then. My little uncut dick with 3 guys looking at me. "Got any drugs inside ya kid?" no. "Turn around and spread em" I turn and show off my asshole. Guess he was happy. "Turn around and lifts your nuts" I do it. "Now pull back your foreskin" "Uhh sorry but I can't pull it back yet sir" He gave me a glare. "Bullshit kid pull it back so I can see if you got any drugs under it or I'm gonna have it cut off" The fuck you will. I tried to pull it back and my pink head poked out enough to see. "Alright kid put these on and wait here" I'm handed some cheap jumpsuit and flipflops. Ah a pot to piss in on the wall and that's just what I do. I walked up naked to the steel pisser and see a camera following me. Fuckin pervs. Fuckin feels good to piss at least they can't take that away from me. I dress and put on the cold flippers. It's fuckin freezin in here man! Click. The door opens and in comes scarface. "Alright Stevens here's how it is. Play nice with me and the guys and everythings cool till you see the judge. Fuck around at all and you get fucked got it?" Yes sir. But what does he mean play nice? "Open Nine" Click another door opens and I get taken down a hallway. We pass another gate; Section 2 Youth 11-13 that's where I belong. No ones around so I'm taken down the next hall. Section 4 Youth 14-17 Secure. In goes the big key and click I'm pushed into a dim bunk room that smells like the boys room alright. Fuckers can at least shower. Man they stink. I find a bunk and lay down to think for a minute. What the fuck just happened? Why am I in jail for murder? So many thoughts so little time. I fall asleep. A fuckin horn goes off and everyone jumps to the floor and stands in a line. Everyones name is read off and we have to say here. It's rollcall and way to fuckin early for this shit. I hear something rolling down the hall and stops at the door. A couple of guards and a cart come inside to give out some food. Yea that's right I'm supposed to eat again. Looks safe anyway. Grab my food and find a spot to eat at. Someone trys to grab something from my plate and I caught his hand in mid air. "Do that again and see what happens" He get warned and wise. Never fuck with my food. Never. I studied martial arts since I was 6 and not afraid to defend myself or my food. "You Stevens right? What you in here for?" Don't talk to me when I'm eating. "Punk-ass I said what you in here for foo?" I finished my bite and said "murder foo" "Yea right punk-ass you ain't in for no murder. Bitch can't even hold a gun" how fuckin bad do you wanna find out I thought. This asswipe is starting to get on my nerves. What to do... Ignore, move away or fuck him over? Tough call. Ignore worked out and I got to finish eating. A TV came on behind a glass window with some stupid morning news. I go back to my cot and try to snooze a while longer. Here I am a low class white boy sitting in jail for a murder I didn't even do. Wha'ts really sad is I'm sitting in a room with 9 other gang members that I don't know the first thing about. The worst thing I've ever done was curfew and stolen a candy bar cuz I was starving. I'm the only white boy in here and the odds are against me if a fight breaks out. Then again maybe not. I don't wanna find out. "Stevens come to the door" so I get up and wait by the door. 2 guards and a cop come and take me to a seperate room with more cops waiting for me. "Sit down son" the guy was a detective. He had some bad aftershave. "well what do we have here, it looks like Anthony Stevens. You know why you are here?" No sir. I try to kiss up so maybe they would let me go. "Well son someone saw you blow away Eddie Benz, you know who that is?" nope. "Take him to line-up" and I got taken into a room with a bunch of other kids. They all looked guilty of murder. "Fourteen step forward please" I was number 14 and took the step. "Ok fourteen step back" I wonder if that was good or bad. "Fourteen step to the door" I stand and wait. The others were taken out of the room leaving just me. Click the door opens and I'm led by the cops to another room. Interrogation. "Well son here's how it is, you have the right to remain silent" I was given my rights and the cops grilled me for hours on end. Man I tell you they asked everything. Even about my sex life and that's something I've never even lived yet. "Well Stevens everything points to you as the one who killed him. The witness pointed you out in the line up and everything. Personally I think you did it." Yea ok whatever. "Bring him back to the holding area" and away we go. I get taken to a different part of the motel and put in a room with 2 other boys about my age. Both were white and less of a pain. I have nothing against blacks but when I'm the only white boy around it bothers me a little. Click the door locks behind me and I look around a little. No cameras this time that's cool cuz I hate to shit on TV. The 2 boys kinda look at me for a second then back to the ceiling. "Guess you're in for a felony huh?" one asks. Yea I nodded. "Well that's what this room is for and ain't no way out now" Guess not. Just how the fuck did I end up in here? I never killed even a bird in my life now they wanna put me away. Wonder how my dad is doing? Well I do know one thing he's gotta be drunk by now. All my life I don't think he was ever sober. "Justin and Stevens move to the back of the cell Becker to the door" The door opened and one kid left us. Now we are alone so maybe he will leave me alone. Wonder what time it is. After a while the other kid leaves so I'm alone by myself and drift off to sleep. The door slams shut and a new kid comes in. What the fuck is this shit. He looks like he couldn't hurt a bug! He sits down and starts to cry. I felt so sorry for him but what could I do? Think Anthony what would you like right now? Food would be nice and getting out would be great but that's not gonna happen. Hold him? Guess I could try I mean what's so bad about him anyway? I get up and sit next to him and he burys his face in my chest. Someone fucked him up bad. I put my arms around him and he crys harder. Maybe after a while he will feel better, at least I hope he does. After a while he looks up at me. "Thanks" and sniffles a big wad of snot. We sat for the longest time and didn't say anything. I heard a guard yell lights out and the room got dark. I didn't care really. My life was over now so the best I could do was at least help this kid feel a little better. He went to the other bunk and fell asleep and I did the same thing. Actually my dick was hard as a rock again but what else was new? Wish it would stop doing that cuz it always means I'm gonna have an accident in my sleep. Fuck I hate this shit. "Hey Stevens you awake?" Whos whispering at me? The kid in the other cot I guess. I look over at him. "Can I sleep with you I mean I used to sleep with my brother all the time and now I'm kinda you know..." Yea sure I guess I mean what's he gonna do to me anyway. Shit it cold in here. He gets in the cot with me and I fall asleep. "Stevens and Thomas on your feet" we get up and face the back wall. They push some food in the small door and lock it again. Actually it wasn't bad this time around. Scrambled eggs and cerial tasted pretty good. "So what are you here for man?" I looked at him and put my finger up to say wait a minute. "Murder dude at least that's what they tell me" His jaw dropped. "Did you say murder?" nod yea. "That's fucked up man" I agree. "Well I don't know if it's murder or what. I saw a murder but didn't do it" I told him. Actually I told him just about everything I could remember. Sad thing is I didn't do it and I kinda feel framed for it. "So what are you in here for dude? I mean you don't even look old enough to do anything" He looked up and said he stole a really rare watch that was worth a grand and his mom turned him in. Now that gets the bitch of the year award. I mean how many moms turn in their kids to the cops? That's really fucked up. Time passes really slow now. I want to talk to him but he doesn't look like talking. What's it like to have a brother I wonder. Must be nice I guess. "Stevens to the door" I get up. The guards take me down to a room and make me change clothes into something else. Some cheap pants and a dressy shirt. They take me to another room where I see this guy waiting for me. "Anthony Stevens? nod yea "I'm a lawyer and want to help you. Do you know what is happeneing here?" I try to explain but it's like everything things confused. I'm so messed up right now I can't even think. I guess he knew where I was coming from and said I would go to court next week. Oh goodie I get to sit around and do nothing but let them piss my life away. Back in a new jumpsuit again and into the same hole. At least I had the same kid from before. "Well anything good?" he asked. Nothing really just gotta spill my guts out and see the judge next week. Big deal. Gotta pee again. Picture this. A cell about the size of a bedroom with 2 beds and a table on one side and a metal pot in the corner that doesn't even have a lid on it. Got a cold sink and a plastic cup and thats about it. Almost forgot the deck of cards and something to read. No TV or radio nothing. I can't even turn off the lights. A real shit hole. I got up to pee but didn't think to turn my back at all. I mean who cares really? The kid was kinda watching me pee but I didn't care. He seems pretty cool and all. "Wanna play cards?" yea I guess. We covered poker I don't know how many times until lights out. I felt tired and didn't sleep worth shit before. This fuckin jumpsuit is not for sleeping in so I took it off before I crashed. Much better. The kid came into my bed again like last night and for once I slept really good. Maybe this brother thing isn't so bad. Guess he slept pretty good at least he was snoring. I woke to a door slamming down the hall and looked up. It must still be late cuz the lights are out. My dick was hard as always this time right inside his butt. This was not good, not good at all. I totally forgot I was sleeping naked and he did the same tonight. It felt real strange just then but it always feels strange now. Kinda like I gotta pee but not really. I mean it sorta tickles on the end for some reason. Who knows but I'm going back to sleep. "Stevens Thomas on your feet" shit why do they have to wake us up like that? We face the wall again and the food comes in. We ate in silence. I started reading the paper and the Thomas kid got taken out leaving me all alone until another kid comes in. He looked a little wild but nothing serious. Maybe 15 years old with dark hair. "What's your story?" I asked just as he sat down. Dealing was his thing. He got caught with something on him but didn't say what. Wouldn't be grass shit Iv'e been caught with grass before and they didn't do anything. Fuckin time was standing still for me now. I read the damn paper so many times I remembered everything and cards suck. What to do. "Hey ain't you Tony Stevens?" I looked up. Now anyone that calls me Tony is lookin for an ass kickin or better have a good reason to call me that. "You are ain't ya?" Nod yea. "Dude check this out everyones talking about ya in the hood man. They say someone else did it but pointed the finger at you" Ok he can call me Tony. "Dude I used to hang with Lizzy man he said someone fingered you and I know who it was" Dude are you serious I asked. "Yea serious! Just wanted ya to know that's all" Yea great now if I knew who it was I could get outta here. To late for today it's lights out again. I got undressed and slipped under the itchy blanket. He did the same and didn't take long to start snoring. I couldn't sleep. I missed having the other kid around. The past few days he was actually getting into me. This new kid I didn't know if I should beat the truth outta him or wait it out. I was to tired so it was wait and see. Another day passed by with a little more to do. We got to go to the rec center for a while and watch TV. It was saturday now and I totally lost track of the days. I was stuck with this kid for the long weekend being it was july 4th now. Nothing was going to happen until tuesday. Back in the hole it was lights out again. "Hey Tony can I ask ya something?" yea. "Dude well it's been a long ass time and I need to umm relax it if you know what I mean" Relax what? What the fuck is he talking about? Until now I never knew what jerkin off was. Serious man I guess I never got to know it. "Just what are you talking about anyway?" He got up and looked at me so I got up and did the same. "You don't know what jerkin off is? Are you serious man?" yea I'm fuckin serious. "Ok here's how it is you take your dick and rub it up and down until you cum that's it" This is a game right? "Ok Tony level with me man. I will show you how to do it but no one knows alright?" Yea sure. He stood up and took off his suit and sat down next to me and started to rub his dick. I didn't see much in the dark but enough to know how to do it. Oh man talk about feeling good. It got better and better until I had to pee. I got up and tried to pee but nothing came out. Wow that felt pretty good. "Dude you don't pee man" Well what the fuck is it then? "Dude lay down and I'm gonna do it for ya" The fuck anyone is gonna touch my dick but before I could stop him things started feeling even better than before. Fuck it let him do it if it feels this damn good. My foreskin started to burn real bad but it felt great. "Oh shit man I'm gonna pee" I tried to hold it back but it came out anyway with the most explosive feelings in my life. Wow! Fuck that felt good. I felt the same sticky stuff on me like I got from my accidents. It was sperm and I didn't know. The kid started to run his mouth over me and licked it all up man that was gross. I was finished and grossed out so he went back to his cot and did himself. I watched as he pumped his hand over his dick and started shooting all over some toilet paper. This was the thing I've been missing all along! Why the fuck didn't I figure it out before? I gotta try that again tomorrow, Im too tired now. Once again roll call and breakfast but this time it was different. I only put the suit on halfway because I felt kinda hot in a way. "Hey Tony man you can take it all off I mean we ain't gonna be leaving here at all today." I took it all off cuz I felt like it. "You wanna jerk again?" Oh hell yea! "Oh look at this Tony has his skin! Well no shit... I looked down at his and he was missing it instead had a pink band. His was a little bigger than mine with alot more hair. I guess before I never really looked at another dudes dick I mean what was the point? To me it was something to piss out of and nothing more. It looked sorta cool on him. Kinda hung down and looked sorta flat against his low balls. He actually looked like a man really. Mine didn't hang down much and my balls were smaller so I had some catching up to do. Don't know really but it looked cool in a way. His chest was average I guess but didn't have anything to compare with. He was just well built I guess. "So Tony you like what I have?" I nodded yea but didn't know where it was going to go. "If you do something for me I will tell you who fingered ya" Do what? "Will you let me suck your dick?" Suck my what? I heard about it and everyone said it was gay, well I didn't wanna be gay but I did want to know who pinned me. "Yea I guess I mean I dunno" was all I could say. I mean no one ever asked me this before. He pointed to the bed and I layed down. He got between my legs and oh shit wow! Jerkin was good but this was a fuck of alot better. For the first time my skin went down on its own and man did that feel good! Fuck he sucked my dick and I started pumpin everything I had. Damn that felt good! "Oh fuck Tony that was hot!" Guess I heard him but I was outta it. That was a thousand times better than any drug I ever took. "Hey Tony man wake up dude are you alright?" Nod yea. "Ok man it was Henry that fingered ya but you didn't hear that from me" Ok when I get my chance I'm gonna let it out and I might be back for murder if I find the punk. I let the dude suck me 5 more times that day and when it was lights out I felt so relaxed it wasn't even funny. "Tony could I ask something from you?" Damn right you can. "Would you maybe umm suck my dick?" At that point I didn't even care and sucked him. I didn't know how at first but he helped me out. It was after his 2nd it hit me that I liked sucking his dick. The first time he spermed in my mouth it scared me but after tasting it for a second I liked it. No I loved it. Here was this dude I didn't even know his real name and I was in love with his dick. I had to have it. Almost all night we sucked our dicks until we fell asleep naked in my bed together. That was the best night sleep I ever had. "Stevens on your feet face the door" I got up and into my suit. Today I had to see that lawyer but this time I had my ace. I told him about Henry and how he framed me for the murder. The lawyer got the cop in with us and a half hour later he went to make a phone call. I went back to the cell and took everything off again. I wanted to suck some dick and he was waiting for me. With the door closed I went between his legs and sucked him until nothing could come out anymore and he did the same to me. Many hours later I was back at the door again only this was to be the last time. I turned and looked at my friend for a minute. "Dude I'm gonna miss you" He got up and we hugged. "Don't worry I'm out by the weekend so look for me by Parkers. Fuck I know where that is! "You bet I'm gonna be waiting!" "Anthony Stevens you are being released and cleared of the charges, we are so sorry this happened" Yea well I'm not so sorry now.