Date: Sat, 18 Sep 2010 00:51:48 -0600
From: paramoe1954@hushmail.com
Subject: The Sweet Spot

***Before you judge me, read to the end. Okay?***

***This work is complete fiction. None of the characters in this story are
real. The events in this story have never happened. This whole thing is
made up, but creatively. Please send me comments! I want to know what you
liked or disliked!  paramoe1954@hushmail.com***


One day you can be living life and everything is normal. The next day, your
whole world can be completely different. One day I was jacking off to
pictures of my high school football team. The next day I found myself
loving, aching and crying because I thought that I would never get to grind
my hips against Sean's nine year old body again. Yep, I fell in love with
an nine year old. This is a short story so read on and I'll be quick about
telling you everything.

I knew that when I got home from the library that the house would be filled
with screaming kids and loud aunts and uncles that came to visit. Normally
I took the opportunity to stare at my older cousin Eric's body, because he
was a weight lifter, but I knew he wasn't visiting this year. I took my
time getting home because I knew that I wouldn't be able to lock myself in
my room and turn my music up. Mom called it being polite and entertaining
guests, but Dad called it 'not being so fucking lazy and coming downstairs
every once in a while'. So when I got home, I hugged family and received
kisses on my cheeks. My grandma said repeatedly, "James! You've grown so
big!"

Dad watched me the whole time and when he thought I wasn't doing enough, I
would hear the high volumed "JAMES!" in the air. I grumbled and gave him
heck about it every time because I didn't like being treated like a servant
boy. If he was going to be shouting out orders then I was going to match
him in complaints and smart ass remarks. I think it made him feel more like
a man when he told me what to do. It showed everyone that he was in
charge. I don't think anybody but my own Dad cared about who was in charge,
but he ordered me around anyway.

I hadn't ever come out to my family about the fact that I liked guys. I
think my mom guessed at it but ignored it. And I think my Dad knew it but
passively hated me for it.  My father hated that I wasn't working on the
car with him or watching football. It really frustrated him to see me
sitting on the couch reading a book. But that is not the focus of the
story. This is about my little angel named Sean and not my fuck-tard of a
father.

After I had moved the barbecue around the back yard many times, my Dad
seemed alright with where it was. I tried to sneak back into the house
without him noticing. My mom seemed to catch on and told me to hurry to
catch some quiet time because the smaller cousins would be home from their
movie soon. Rushed to get up to my room and closed the door. That was when
I saw my grandparent's luggage on the floor. I realized that they would
probably be sleeping in my room that night, which meant that I would be
sleeping on the couch downstairs. I grabbed whatever books I could get my
hands on and sat in the living room to read.

The background noise of my family's joking and laughing was easily blocked
out as I dove deep into the pages of some fantasy novel. I barely noticed
the bubbling laughter of my young cousins outside. I knew that they would
come in to play the x-box and I would greet them all and then go back to
reading. The younglings entered through the front door one by one. Some
said hello, while the some just passed on by. They got soda cans from the
fridge and plopped down in front of the television. They argued about who
would get to play first, but they all gave way to the oldest cousin named
Jared, who was eleven. I looked up from my pages to see Jared smack the
youngest on the back of the head. He didn't smack very hard, but it was
loud enough that I heard it clearly.

"Careful." I cautioned out loud. That's when I noticed the clump of boys on
the floor and then there was another single boy sitting on the recliner,
away from the group. I did a double take, trying to figure out who the boy
was. He didn't look at all familiar and after a few seconds I could see
that he was uncomfortable with my staring.

I glanced at the boys in front of the television, seeing that I knew who
each of them were.

"Who are you?" I finally asked the lone boy.  He began to answer, but was
cut off by my nine year old cousin named Paul, "His name is Sean. He's our
next door neighbor."

"Oh." I said, glancing back to Sean again. I had to stare at the boy again
because even though I hated to think it, he was perfect. Sure, he was only
about nine years old or so, but his hair color was somewhere between blond
and brown, but it wasn't sandy blond. The softness of his haircut, which
was a bit longer than most, almost formed a bowl around his head. The color
of his skin seemed to compliment his hair color. And as I searched his
features, I was in awe of more beauty. His eyes were big and bright and
blue and his nose was just slightly upturned, not looking snobbish, but
just enough that it fit a smile. His eyebrows were soft and yet darker than
his hair color and seemed to bring an intensity to his thick eyelashes. If
I had the choice of any facial features to fit together, the combination
would be Sean's face.

I finally looked away from the boy and attempted to go back to my book, but
I kept stealing glances here and there. Maybe I was trying to find a
destroying flaw in the boy's perfection, but I couldn't find anything wrong
with him. I wasn't attracted to him, but I knew beauty when I saw it and I
couldn't help but wonder what Sean would grow to look like as a teenager. I
found myself feeling pained and a little deprived that I would be in my
twenties when Sean was in his teens.

The minutes passed by and I noticed that all of the boys on the floor were
taking turns playing the game but Sean just sat back and watched them. I
also saw that the boys had helped themselves to sodas while Sean had
nothing.

"Sean?" I asked, "Would you like a soda?"

Before Sean could answer, Paul cut in again. "He's not allowed to have
anything because he's in trouble."

"Paul!" I snapped at him. "Are you Sean's interpreter or can he speak
English?"  Paul didn't reply or show the slightest bit that he cared about
what I was saying.

I turned my attention back to Sean, "Why are you in trouble?"

He seemed to cringe in the chair, shrugging his shoulders in reply. I
looked back to Paul and he answered without taking his eyes off of the
game. "Jared's mad at him because he beat everybody in Strategos at the
arcade."

My eyes popped open wide and my I stared back at Sean, trying to figure him
out. The game of Strategos was an experimental game for advanced college
students. It took most people years to know all of the workings of the
game, unless you were a genius. Knowing that Jared wasn't the sharpest tool
in the shed, I wondered if it had been a chance win by Sean.

"Who did you beat at the arcade?" I asked Sean.

Paul was right on cue to cut off Sean's response, "He beat everyone, even
the older kids. They got mad kicked us out."  Paul's little brother, Carl
chimed in saying, "It's because he goes to smart classes!" He ended his
statement by sticking his tongue out at Sean.

I put my book down, looking intently at Sean, "How old were the older
kids?" I asked, seeing Sean's eyes dart to the floor.

"One guy," Paul answered loudly, "had pubic hairs growing out of his face!"
The other boys laughed at his comment. But Jared kept his eyes on the
screen

My mouth dropped open as I stared at Sean once again. I was in awe and
realizing that the small figure that sat away from the other kids, did so
for a reason. Sean was smart. It took me a long time to learn how to play
Strategos effectively and I still sucked at the game. I was pretty sure
that I could win the bet that there was no one smarter than Sean within a
hundred mile radius. I sat for hours at watching college student after
college student fail at Strategos and spent almost as much time watching
geniuses win time and time again on youtube.

I smiled, giving Sean an approving nod. I examined the boy, thinking that
it was an extraordinary chance happening that this little guy was born with
such perfect features and a genius to boot. I remembered reading books
about mentally advanced children and how they appeared to be little on the
outside, but their speech had all the mannerisms of adults. I recalled an
article on a blog somewhere that talked about how the little geniuses hated
being treated like babies when they could do their parent's taxes as young
as six years old.

I glanced at the back of Jared's head, understanding why he didn't want to
allow Sean to play x-box. I let slip a laugh.

Sean was smiling when I looked back at him. Maybe he understood that I had
caught on to why he was being treated differently. His little body shook in
a silent giggle and it was suddenly like we were sharing a private joke.

I smiled wide at him and said, "You deserve a soda." I stood and gestured
for him to follow me into the kitchen. Sean followed right behind me and it
didn't seem like the other boys noticed.

My mom and my aunt Sharon were sitting on the bar stools at the counter
talking about garden flowers. They ignored us when we entered. Sean sat
himself at the kitchen table and I brought him a can of Pepsi along with
one for myself.

We opened our cans and took a sip. I raised the can to take another sip and
noticed that Sean was copying my actions. He was playing the mirror game
with me and trying to hold back a giggle. I brought the can close to my
mouth but licked the top of the can instead of drinking. He licked the top
of his can as well. I set the can down and acted like I was picking my
nose, he copied that too. The mirror game had progressed to him trying to
guess and match my movements to the second. I kept doing weirder and
weirder things until I was standing and acting like I was punching myself
in the balls. That is when Sean gave up because he was laughing so hard. We
laughed together and sat back down to drink our sodas.

I noticed my mom and my aunt get up to go outside where everyone else was,
her gaze lingered on me. She didn't look mad but she didn't look happy
either. I wondered what that was all about, but quickly forgot about it.

I took a big gulp of my Pepsi, then asked, "Where did you learn to play
Strategos?"

Sean swallowed a gulp of his drink, but answered with a shrug.

"Is there a machine where you live?" I continued prodding. Then it hit me
that, if he was my cousin's neighbor then he was a long way from home
because they had to drive three hundred miles to get here. "Wait," I said,
"why did you come all the way out here if they treat you like that?"

Sean seemed to stare at something beyond the table before answering by
pointing his finger at me.

I smiled at him, "You came here because of me?"

He nodded a very clear 'yes', then waited a couple of seconds before
shrugging again.

I shook my head, examining his face. "Why don't you talk?" I asked.

He shrugged again and took another swig from his Pepsi can.

"You can't answer everything with a shrug." I said, laughing at him.

He smiled wide and corrected me by nodding his head.

I laughed more, saying, "Can you actually talk?" He replied by nodding
'yes' but holding two crossed index fingers over his mouth.

I shook my head saying, "I don't understand."

He shook his head vigorously, then reached over and tapped his little
finger on my left temple.

"I know?" I asked.

He smiled and sat back in his chair looking very satisfied. I examined him
again, feeling like this game was either so simple or so complex that I
would never understand it. I wasn't laughing anymore and my little friend
wasn't smiling either, we just sat at the table drinking in silence. In any
other situation, the silence would have been awkward, but in this case it
felt just right. It was like a calm in a good conversation.

Sean continued taking little sips from his can of soda, swinging his legs
happily. I suddenly noticed that he was staring at my book that I had set
on the table. The book was called Pyre Gables and it was thick enough to be
used as a door stop.

Sean looked from the book to me, then back to the book again.

"You've read this?" I asked, sitting up in my seat. "No way you've read
this!"

He shook his head then reached for the book, opening the front cover. He
pressed his little index finger to the list of seventeen books in the
series. He slowly moved his finger down the list and stopped on book number
sixteen. The publishing company had listed the seventeenth book along with
the others but it wasn't due to come out for another year. I questioned
whether Sean had stopped on book number sixteen because he was telling the
truth or because it was a lucky guess.

My eyes flashed on the hutch in the corner of the kitchen. I went to the
hutch and opened the bottom cupboard doors to reveal a helter skelter of
board games from checkers to monopoly. I grabbed at the Creeg's Chess set,
hoping that all of the pieces were still there.

"I play a mean game of chess," I said, walking back to the kitchen table,
"but no one has been able to beat me yet." I smiled at him, watching him
give a blank stare at the chess board that I was unfolding.

"You want to try to beat me?" I asked.

Sean didn't look excited but he didn't seem put off either. He finally took
his eyes off of the chess board and smiled at me. He let out a sigh as he
brought out the chess pieces and placed them in the proper spots.

I was telling the truth about playing a mean game of chess. I was the best
in a big group of geeks at my school who also lost many battles to me in
the game of War Hammer. I considered strategy my forte, but I also knew
that if Sean was a genius, I wouldn't have a chance.

When the pieces were laid out on the board, I decided to go first since I
was supposedly the weaker opponent. I already had a strategy in my head to
sacrifice some pieces to taunt his pieces into the right spots. I set the
first pawn forward and Sean immediately moved his pawn in mirror fashion,
matching my move. This happened for the first three pieces that I pushed
out. As soon as I had my hand off of the chess piece, Sean was picking up
one of his pieces and tapping it into the spot that he wanted. It looked
like he was putting on a show because my brain refused to believe that he
was figuring things out so quickly for where to move his pawns.

Now that three of my pawns were moved in the right spots, I had to figure
out which route I would take my strategy. I tried to anticipate which move
my opponent would fall for. I decided on opening up the right side of my
board and picking off his pieces in the open areas, it was an ambush. As
soon as I moved my knight into place, Sean moved his rook 2 spaces. It was
fast but it was too fast. He moved just as quickly when he moved his pawn
and then his knight.

A part of me was a little disappointed when I was able to take Sean's
knight and then his pawn. I figured that it should be more difficult, even
if Sean wasn't a genius. My mind's eye looked at Sean, not knowing whether
to see him as a genius or just a cute little nine year old that was a good
actor. I tried not to let my disappointment show as I scooted my bishop
into the next spot.

I saw Sean immediately, slide his queen diagonally, then grab my king piece
and tap it once on the board. He was placing me in 'Check'. I almost
laughed when Sean did this because I was sure that he was acting it out and
maybe trying to be funny. Sean, however, wasn't laughing, but was staring
at me and waiting.

My mouth dropped open a little as I examined where my pieces were. My brain
worked hard to find a flaw in his claim for check status. As hard as I
tried, I was unable to come up with a two-move guard and attack
strategy. If I moved my knight to guard, his other bishop would attack. If
I moved my king in any single spot, they were all vulnerable. I sat back in
my chair realizing that although I thought I was taunting Sean into my
plan, he was watching my plan to set me up.

I placed a finger on the top of my king statue and tipped it to lay flat on
it's side, surrendering to check-mate.

I was staring at Sean again with awe. I knew he could see it but I didn't
care. It was nice to be sitting so close to some one who didn't come off as
a red neck trucker who couldn't read. Sean was the most different person in
such a wide area and I'm sure he knew it.

"There's no one in here but us." I said, "Please talk now."

Sean stared blankly at the chess board and shook his head.

I heard the two-way kitchen door swing open and my dad walked in. He looked
at me like I was doing something wrong even though I was just sitting
there. His eyes landed on the chess board and that was all he needed to get
him started.

"James, get out there and help set things up for the fireworks!" He barked.

Instinctively, I rolled my eyes and was about to respond with a smart ass
comment, when I noticed Sean sitting there with his hand over his
mouth. The sight confused me, but instead of talking back to my father, I
kept my mouth shut while I went outside to help.

In our county, it was legal to set off fireworks and every year the entire
family visited our house for our own private show on the fourth of July.
Our back yard was pretty big and could fit the whole extended family and
some of the neighbors. Our house was the central place on the block for
people to visit the day before the fourth.

The sun had already set in the sky and it was necessary to turn on the
strands of white christmas lights that hung from the fences and the
trees. The air was filled with the scent of barbecued meat, firecrackers
smoke and the hum of voices.

I laid out long sheets of plastic on the grass around where we would set
off the fireworks. I guess my dad thought that plastic couldn't get set on
fire if things went wrong, whatever, I did it anyway. As I unfolded plastic
tarps, some of my older cousins came to talk with me, asking about school
and all the basics. As I listened and chatted with people I kept my eyes on
Sean, who was following my crowd of younger cousins. Now that I understood
him a bit more, the difference between Sean and the others was
noticeable. The other boys jumped around more and fidgeted while Sean stood
back and examined people and their situations.

The cousins were surrounding my aunt Trudy, who was handing out different
colored glow sticks.  Paul and my other cousins fought over the green
colored glow sticks because they were the brightest, and Sean watched Jared
bully an extra stick from Paul. When every one seemed to have their sticks
in hand, the kids ran off, but Sean remained waiting quietly next to my
aunt, without a glow stick in his hands. She noticed Sean after a minute
and bent down to talk to him like he was the same as one of the younger
cousins. Aunt Trudy shrugged with her hands out, palms up, telling Sean
that she was out of glow sticks to give out. She apologized, pinching
Sean's cheek and handing him a paper pinwheel to pacify him. During the
whole thing, Sean hadn't said a word and as my aunt turned back to chat
with family, I watched Sean examine the pinwheel with a trivial look, then
set it on the table.

I watched Sean walk away, feeling sorry for him and feeling anger at the
adults who didn't understand that he was something incredibly
different. This young boy that they all treated like a baby, could do
anything far better than an adult without blinking an eye. Sean didn't
deserve a glow stick or a pinwheel, he deserved attention and brilliance to
take his attention. As I watched him walk away, in no certain direction, I
recognized him as a small giant walking amongst so many tall insects.

The evening went on and I realized that my dad was doing his part to set
things up instead of lashing out and barking orders at me the whole time. I
liked it. It gave me a little time to think.

I pondered everything that Sean and I had talked about at the kitchen table
and then it hit me that he really hadn't said anything. I knew things about
him, but I gained the knowledge without hearing him speak a word. I knew
that he was very smart. I learned that he was my cousin's next door
neighbor and that he was a wiz at playing Strategos. And I knew that he had
read the entire Gables series of books.

My thoughts went back to when we were in the living room and Sean couldn't
get in one word because Paul was answering for him. Sean didn't seem
frustrated by the fact that he never got the chance to say things, he just
let it happen. It seemed clear then that Sean was being silent on purpose
and I was curious if anyone had ever heard him speak.

"Thanks." My dad said to me. I straightened up, looking after him as he
carried a rack across the back yard. He normally only had negative things
to say to me. I realized that my dad hadn't been on my case while I was out
here and I wondered if it was because I had kept my mouth shut rather than
quipping a sarcastic remark. Perhaps it was my own negative comments that
fed my father's anger. I contemplated whether my quickness to defy my
father's control was what spawned the need for control. If that was the
case then this could be proof of it. Then it occurred to me that Sean was
the one who had made me keep quiet when my dad was flipping out on me. The
boy hadn't said a word, but he seemed to know what I should do.

Just before the fireworks show, I went walking through the house looking
for Sean, hoping that I could catch a small private moment with him. I
couldn't find him. He wasn't in the house so he must have been mixed in the
crowd of people gathered in the back yard.

My eyes searched the groups of people and I finally saw him. He was
standing with my cousins across the yard but it looked like they had
slopped mud all over his head and face. They were making fun of him and
calling him a fart monster. When the boys saw me approaching, they ran away
yelling, "Oh no it's another fart monster!"

Sean just stood there smiling through the mud and shrugged his shoulders. I
cleared some of the mud away from his forehead and he winced. I saw that he
had been hit on the head and there was a bruise there.

"Why do you let them do this to you?" I asked, without waiting for an
answer. I kept wiping the mud away from his face with my shirt and that's
when I noticed the tears streaming down his face.

"They're your friends." I whispered. They were his only friends. I didn't
say it out loud but I knew that if he didn't have them when he got back, he
would have no one to call a friend. It was a bad deal to be stuck with kids
who treated you poorly because you could make them feel stupid.

"I'm your friend now too." I said, kneeling beside him and caressing his
hand in mine. I couldn't stop looking at him. I didn't want to stop taking
in every perfect feature of some one so special. I only stared at him as he
tilted his head upward to see the fire in the sky. Dazzling glints of light
reflected off of the pools of tears that had built up in his eyes and I
wanted to do something. I suddenly felt the overwhelming urge to gently
kiss those eyes. I wanted to kiss away the tears that were hurting him. I
wanted to show him that it was possible to have friends who didn't hurt
you. But I didn't do anything but look at him like he was a dazzling
sunset.

"You're beautiful." I whispered.

Of course, Sean didn't say anything. He simply leaned in closer to me and
kept his eyes on the show above. I rubbed my hand in soothing circles on
his back, taking in his scent and suddenly being filled with unexpected
desire. I knew that I could do anything at that moment because everyone was
looking up, while I was looking at my boy.

Sean seemed to notice something different and his eyes met mine. He stared
deep into my eyes and we were communicating something special. He looked at
me like I had just told his something unexpectedand amazing.

The show ended pretty quickly since fireworks were to expensive to keep
things going for an hour. I helped my dad pull down the racks for the
fireworks and mom waved to people as they left the house.

I was comforted to know that Sean would be staying the night, but I knew
that he would be sleeping upstairs and in a different part of the house
from where I would sleep in the living room. I wanted so bad to have even
just a few minutes alone with him to see if I could just get him to
talk. It was strange to feel closer to some one and not know what they
sounded like. I wanted to simply hear what he sounded like. I craved
knowing what that special boy's words would be like. Above all, I wanted
him to tell me directly if he felt the same special connection that I was
feeling for him. I hoped that he would tell me that it was alright to just
get a little closer and kiss away the pain and caress his cheeks to comfort
him.

Earlier in the day, kissing a nine year old boy would have been out of the
question, but right then it was all I could think about. I wanted so bad to
kiss and love the skin that belonged to the most special and intelligent
person that I had ever met. I wanted to rub my dick in front of him while
his intelligent eyes examined my actions. I wanted to find a special spot
on him that would surpass his genius with waves of ecstasy. I had never
felt this way about some one so young before, but it was hot.

Everyone was getting ready for bed and try as I might, I couldn't get a
single moment alone with Sean. I imagined taking him aside in my room or in
the pantry off of the kitchen. I could ask him straight out if he was
feeling close to me. He wouldn't even have to talk, he could just nod his
little head to say yes. I wouldn't even know where to begin with him. I
wondered if he had ever kissed anyone before or if he had even had a
boner. Maybe if I could just reach my fingers up one of the legs of his
shorts and feel my way to his dick. It suddenly occurred to me that Sean
was so young that he probably didn't have any pubic hair at all. The
thought of Sean being hairless didn't hinder my need for him, I comforted
myself in the knowledge that he was like a very smart adult inside.

I had a boner as I thought about these things. I was sitting on the living
room couch, covering myself up from getting hard about a little boy. Rather
than push the thoughts and feelings out of my mind, I discovered that I
liked them and I experimented with them. I imagined what Sean would look
like if I pulled down the little red shorts that he wore. 'No hair.' I
reminded myself, 'He would be as smooth as a newborn.' I imagined the
elastic of his shorts pulling down with his boxers, then I changed it to
imagining him with Power Ranger underwear. Power Rangers seemed too
childish for him so I switched the image to where he was just wearing
briefs. As I pulled on his undies I exposed his hairless crotch, but his
dick dangled six inches, like mine would if I shaved it. I tried to imagine
the dick being smaller, but it was difficult since I had fooled around with
guys my age.

The kids were saying goodnight to everyone in the kitchen and the living
room. Sean caught my attention as he was looking at me with a strange
expression that I didn't understand. I wanted to get up and pull him aside
right then but I had a raging hard on.

So that was it, I lost my chance. When my boner had cooled down, I got up
and told my mom that I was going to the trailer to get another blanket for
tonight and maybe get some quiet time out there for reading. We never used
the trailer anymore accept for storage, but we kept the power plugged
in. When things were rough in the house, it was a great place to go to get
lost in a novel. I was in the back of the trailer and had just flipped on
the overhead reading light when I heard the door to the trailer open. I saw
Sean's little head peak in.'

"Sean!" I exclaimed, I hushed my volume back down to a whisper. "How did
you get out here without them seeing you?"

He made his way to the back, looking awesome in his white shirt that was
too big for him. It looked like he was wearing shorts too but it was hard
to tell because the shirt hung low.

I was holding a folded comforter when Sean pulled it out of my hands and
onto the floor. I looked at him surprised and saw him with his index finger
against his lips, telling me to be quiet. I immediately thought that there
might be some one outside the trailer and tried to peak through the
blinds. Sean took hold of my left hand to get my attention, then he pushed
me backwards until I was sitting on the little couch, which had a few
blankets piled on it. He straddled my lap and gestured to be quiet again.

"Okay." I whispered.

He responded by giving me and angry look. He wasn't telling me to be quiet,
he was telling me to shut the fuck up!

I pressed my lips together, showing him that I was serious, but he laid
both of his hands flat on my mouth anyway. He only looked me in the eyes
after that until he leaned forward so that our cheeks were touching. I
heard what I wanted and what I had been longing for. He took in a breath
because he was about to speak.

"Do you like my voice?" He whispered.

All I could do was nod in agreement, but I couldn't do much about the tears
that were filling my eyes. I was overwhelmed. It wasn't just any voice, it
was his voice.

He continued to whisper in a sound that was sweeter than I could have ever
imagined. "You can communicate much more without talking at all. People are
more willing to fill in the gaps with truth rather than mistaken meanings
and lack of vocabulary. Unfortunately most people cast aside their truths
for stereotype."

He leaned back a bit, meeting my eyes again, but he kept his hands over my
mouth. "You can also pick up on a lot when you trust body language versus
talk. For instance, I picked up on this," He removed one of his hands from
my mouth to reach down and grab my half hard dick though the material of my
shorts.

My eyes instantly widened as I watched his reaction. There was a part of me
that waited for him to make some sort of a threat or call me a sicko for
the attraction to such a young boy. I cringed inside as he paused with his
hand down below, hoping that he wouldn't say that I had mistaken a more
meaningful relationship between the two of us. A thousand fears ran through
my mind as I wondered if things would turn scary when he ran out of the
trailer to tell the adults that I was a horndog for a little boy.

Sean looked into my eyes for a few more seconds, searching me for
something. "And," He continued, "I wonder if you picked up on this," He
thrust his hips forward into my abdomen and I could feel his hard little
penis poking into me.

I immediately let loose a breath that I didn't know I was holding. I felt
more tears well up in my eyes as I took in the fulfillment of a wish. My
hands reached around to grab onto Sean's rear as he rhythmically mashed his
hardon into me. I help the boy guiding his hips and squeezing his little
cheeks in the process. He huffed out a little candy scented breath with
every one of his hip thrusts.

He was looking me in the eyes the whole time, blinking with every
thrust. "You know, when you said that I was beautiful?" He said in a shaky
breath.

I nodded, taking in the flushing of his cheeks and the way that his hair
shook and dangled out of place. I took in every breath from his slightly
parted lips, knowing the sound they could make. Everything was beautiful
about him.

His humping was faster now and his breathing was labored as he fought to
keep eye contact with me. Between his small sweet boy grunts he said, "I
had already thought the same thing about you, before you even said it." His
hand slipped from my mouth and he buried his head into the crook of my neck
as be started to hammer his hard little dick into me.  I placed one hand on
the back of his neck, holding him close while the other hand ran up under
his shirt. Simultaneously, I felt for the flexing muscles in the back of
his neck and I traced my fingers down the center of his back. I came to an
obstacle in the form of his underwear which I could tell were briefs as I
jutted my hand at least two inches under the waistband of his red
shorts. My dick stiffened even more as I felt the top round edge of his
butt cheeks, but I wanted more. I wanted both of his smooth cheeks in my
hands while he humped me. I got a little forceful and grabbed both hands
onto Sean's hips, slowing him down. Next, I bunched the material of his
shorts and undies in both hands then gave a good yank towards his feet. I
felt Sean raise his hips off of me to help guide his clothing out of the
way. When his shorts and undies were all the way to his feet, he kicked
them onto the floor, leaving the entire bottom half of his body exposed. I
greedily slapped both hands onto his soft globes of skin, then ran my
fingers lightly on his crack. I kept exploring his butt and I felt him
shudder when my fingers tickled where his ass met his legs. I was pleased
when I felt Sean's silky smooth thighs close to grip onto my exploring
hands. His hips were still raised but were gyrating in an oval as my
trapped fingers wiggled between his squeezing legs.  He seemed to be
enjoying my hands because he was holding his breath and only letting out
very short huffs with every jolt as his thighs gripped tighter with every
movement of my fingers.

As Sean moved further up, we were face to face and I pleasured in watching
his eyes stare past me at nothing. He kept a look of surprise, with
eyebrows raised and the muscles in his arms tensed to keep himself raised
above me. I think what turned me on most was the way his mouth repeatedly
opened slightly, like a toddler anticipating a spoonful of food.

As Sean's arms became tired, he moved lower and lower until our noses were
touching. I reacted automatically to the closeness, tilting my head
sideways to receive a kiss. Although Sean was a genius and talked like an
adult, he kissed like a child. His flush lips puckered into a little boy
kiss and landed on mine. This type of a kiss wasn't what I was expecting,
but it was adorable and because it was Sean's lips, it was so hot!

He had his eyes closed and had rested his body back against me. His closed
lips pecked along my relaxed lips and I breathed in the scent of his breath
coming out of his nose. My hands went from between Sean's legs, to holding
the back of his head as he landed kisses all over my face. After a few more
boy kisses, I held Sean's head briefly and he opened his eyes, looking at
me. I smiled into his baby blue eyes and pointed my tongue out at him. He
seemed to be taken by surprised and giggled, but I responded by leaving my
tongue out, tilting my head a little and opening my mouth slightly. He got
the hint right away and jutted his tongue out as well. I closed my eyes and
gently pulled Sean's head forward until his tongue touched mine. When I
felt the warm texture of his tongue on mine, I moved my tongue around his
and felt him let out a sigh. His head came down more and his tongue
explored mine and soon he couldn't get enough of it. He was sucking on my
mouth like it was the air he needed after suffocating for so long. I gladly
received his warmth into me, feeling even more turned on knowing that this
is what he wanted. If kissing is all we would do tonight then that would be
fine, I could do this forever.

Sean's tongue and lips feverishly lapped at mine and I could feel his
little dick moving against me again. I let him kiss me while I ran my hands
from his shoulder blades, down his back and cupped his butt again. It was
such a turn on feeling and touching his body while he writhed against me
faster and faster.

I took my hands off of his butt cheeks and moved between us. I felt him
slow down as my hands reached his tiny dick. He let out a small gasp as my
hand clasped his dick that couldn't have been longer than an inch an a half
or so. There wasn't a lot of extra skin below the head so I knew that he
was cut. It was odd touching such a small penis since all of the guys that
I've messed around with had a bushel of pubic hair and hairy ball
sacks. This cute little set of genitals was all soft like baby skin, just
as I had imagined it.

Sean had stopped humping and kissing and switched to breathing hard against
my neck as I fondled with his hardon and tickled his balls. He began moving
his hands around and scooting lower. It took a few seconds for me to
understand that he was trying to undo my shorts. I released Sean's tiny
package and unbuttoned my khaki shorts. When my dick poked out of the
zipper I could feel that my own briefs were soaked and moist with
precum. As I pulled my briefs off with my shorts, I made sure to wipe away
as much of the precum onto my undies as possible.

The sensation of Sean's naked skin laying against my own exposed skin was
electrifying. He had scooted lower so that the contrast in the size of our
dicks was noticeable. I gasped a couple of times as I allowed Sean to paw
his little fingers against my boner which was hot and aching for
attention. I braced myself while I felt Sean press his hardon against my
six inch pole. He tried to jack both dicks off together but was unable to
fit his hands around with out it being awkward. Finally, he gave up and
went back to sliding his pelvis against me. He was going slow and I held
onto his waist as he guided us both into a world of raw pleasure.

I placed a hand on top of Sean's beautiful head of hair and whispered, "I
want to keep you forever."

He shook his head against my hand grunting, "We get one chance."

I kissed the top of his head and said, "It's not fair."

He stopped moving against me and looked me in the eyes. "Our situation is
so rare and strange, that we're limited to one option." He slid up to meet
me face to face, sticking his tongue out.

I tilted my head into him and our tongues kissed into each other
again. "What's the one option?" I asked between kisses.

He pulled away from me, staring at me like I should know the answer. "The
only option is what we have right now...tonight"

I shook my head but I knew he was right. We had very little time to display
any affection to each other.

"What did you mean," I breathed, "when you said that you came here for me?"

Sean was grinding into me, making ovals with his groin. As he got into it,
his ovals became reckless humps for pleasure. He humped and spoke in shaky
and uneven breaths, "When I first saw you, you were a neat guy who was
reading my favorite book series." He was grinding into me hard as if his
hip thrusts would put meaning into his words. "You were the most
interesting person here." He began raising and lowering his hips so hard
that our skin was making a loud spanking noise. His little face was turning
red and he began almost speaking in growls, "After I saw you, it was clear
that I was here for you."

I leaned in to him to kiss, but pulled away just before. "I love you." I
said it more as a statement to myself and a realization. Then I said it
again, "I love you!" But I said it to for Sean's ears to take in.

"I love your cute little ears and the way your lips taste." I said, kissing
him. "I love the smooth skin of your neck." I touched the crook of his neck
with my tongue, turning it into a kiss. I kissed him this way all along his
neck. Sean arched his back as I kissed him more and more, running to his
chest, crossing a nipple and ending up at his stomach. I lingered near his
belly button, kissing his stomach with my full tongue. "I love your baby
belly button!" I said in a muffled grunt against his skin. I flipped Sean
over onto his back, seeing his full front in the light.

I watched Sean's reaction as I continued to kiss along his front, getting
closer to his hard little dick. I tongued at the area around his balls and
heard his breathing become more labored. I lapped up the sweet spot between
his butt crack and his ball sack and felt him clamp his legs closed against
my face. I held onto his legs, letting him know that it was okay to squeeze
his legs tighter against me, if he wanted. He squeezed tighter and gripped
the hair on my head with both hands pulling my face closer. I kissed and
licked and felt him jolt when my tongue slipped into his crack a little. I
put my tongue into his crack further and he loosened his legs more,
spreading them and giving me easier access. I had never done anything like
that before in some one's rear, but the quiet whimpers that Sean was
letting out, made me keep going.

I lapped my tongue as fast as I could between his hairless butt cheeks and
loved the sound of my own cupped breathing and licking. I placed both hands
at the place where his legs bent at the hip pulling his ass tight against
my mouth.

I heard the humming bird sound of his fingers furiously jacking along his
dick and I raised my head, bringing it near. I grabbed his wrist and yanked
his hand off of his dick and let my face hover over Sean's penis. I watched
as Sean's tiny hardon throbbed and move in anticipation of further
stimulation. His hands were on my head again trying to pull me down,
silently pleading at me to keep making him feel good. I took a few seconds
to look closely at Sean's genital area. I searched his dick and his balls
and didn't find one trace of a hair follicle. He was far from puberty and I
wondered if he would be able to shoot any sperm when he came.

I looked up, meeting his tired and pleading eyes and said, "And I love your
little boy dick." I brought my head down onto his hardon, taking the little
rod in against my rigid tongue and pressing it firmly against the roof of
my mouth.

Sean's volume increased, out of shock. He breathed in loudly in quick
breathes like he was wading into a pool, of unexpected cold water. His
sighs of ecstasy were hot and loud and his shaky hands landed on my head
almost guiding me along his shaft. He wasn't sighing anymore, but moaning
with every movement of my tongue along his shaft. His hands ruffled my hair
as he very slowly humped his dick into my mouth.

My hand went to rubbing my own dick as I sucked on Sean. I rubbed faster
and faster and matched the speed of my sucking on Sean. He started letting
out long and shaky moans that were jostled by my sucking on him so fast. I
could tell he was getting close to cumming and as intelligent as he was, I
was curious if he had every had an orgasm before in his life.

I sucked and sucked, trying to keep the soft parts of my mouth into a tight
fuck hole around his shaft. Soon I felt his dick become more stiff and his
muscles tightened and he relied more on my movements than the thrusting of
his hips. Finally his dick became so hard that it felt like I was sucking
on a flesh covered rock. He gripped tighter onto the hair on my head and
grunted, "Stop! Stop!"

Instead of stopping, I let go of my own dick, grabbed onto his butt cheeks
and held him firmly against my mouth. His hands were pulling at my hair,
trying to get my mouth away.

"Please stop." He squealed out.

I squeezed at his soft butt in my hands and shook my head against him,
saying no. He seemed to realize what was going on and he closed his thighs
against the sides of my head and let his pelvis spasm into me. I have to
admit that he held on pretty tight and it did hurt, but he was loving it.
I felt his dick go from rigid to limp and then back again, over and over,
trying to pump sperm that wasn't there. His body was trying to do the only
adult thing that he probably couldn't do. Sean's little body hugged against
me with every empty pump of his dick. I slowed the sucking on his dick
because I knew that he would be sensitive. He let the spasms subside a bit
and I felt the muscles in his legs relax a bit more. I pulled off of his
dick to see a little pole that looked like it might have grown a half an
inch in my mouth. His hardon was all wet and still throbbing to left over
pumps into the air. I kissed along his soft sack of his balls gently, while
Sean laid there catching his breath.

"Are you okay?" I asked, between kisses on his skin.

"Yeah." He breathed.

I moved up to kissing along his front until I was facing him again. He was
laid out flat on the couch with his head propped up on a tall stack of
blankets. I straddled his stomach, letting my weight rest on where my knees
sat on the couch under Sean. I sat back a little bit, feeling Sean's dick
touch my butt. He jolted a little and I moved a couple of inches higher so
I wouldn't touch his sensitive dick.

Sean stared at my erection which was pointing upward, then he looked up at
me and smiled. He put a hand on the mushroom head of my dick that seemed
larger than normal at that moment. He lightly massaged the shaft with his
hands. I enjoyed the stimulation and and watched the curiosity cross his
face. He weighed my balls in his soft hand and when precum dripped out of
my head, he ran a finger across the slit and cleared the remainder away. He
played with the precum, measuring the stickiness between his thumb and
forefinger. Then Sean scooted under me, placing his head closer to my dick
and balls. He stuck his tongue out and I pulled my hips away.

"Dude." I looked down at him in disbelief. "You do not want to try and suck
me. My dick is big and it oozes stuff that tastes gross!"

Sean looked from me and back to my crotch and said, "Can I kiss it?"

I nodded and moved my dick back to his face. I don't know why, but I
thought he was going to quickly give me a little boy kiss, but Sean learned
quickly. He jutted his tongue out again and mashed the tip against the
underside of my shaft. He tilted his head so that my dick cradled sideways
against his lips.

I let out an audible groan as I tried not to press my dick too hard against
his lips. I cringed closer to him as I felt the texture of his little
tongue running against my dick. I placed my hands on him, cupping his
cheeks as I gently slid my dick along his mouth. I groaned with every
movement against his youthful face. I humped against the muffled slurping
sounds of his mouth, knowing that this is the hottest thing in the world
and that no other guy with pubic hair had ever given me such pleasure.

On one of my passes against his face, Sean grabbed hold of my dick and put
the head in his mouth.

"Teeth!" I yelped, cringing against him.

I breathed heavily and waited for him to figure out how to put his mouth on
me without hurting me. He was awkward with figuring things out but every
movement felt amazing. Finally Sean got it right and it felt so good
feeling his mouth sliding around awkwardly around my dick head. It looked
like Sean would only be able to fit the head of my penis in his mouth, but
that was alright because he was doing amazing.

After a few seconds of sucking, Sean pulled his mouth off of me, making a
sour face and coughing.

"See?" I shook my head, feeling horrible for letting him try. "Tastes gross
doesn't it?"

He nodded his head in agreement, "That's nasty!" He took a few moments to
breathe and then to my surprise, he put my dick back in his mouth. I gasped
and cringed again in surprise. It felt so amazing. I cupped his cheeks
again gently caressing his baby face.  "You don't have to do this." I said,
but I couldn't bring myself to pull my dick out of his mouth. I saw the
sour face again but felt better when he seemed to recover quickly.

As I looked down and in between my legs, seeing Sean's young lips sucking
me like a lollypop, I wondered if this is what breast feeding was like. I
remembered hearing about mothers who experienced sexual stimulation and
orgasms while breast feeding and Sean looked so young to me. If breast
feeding was like putting your dick in a boy's mouth then I envied
motherhood.

I was getting close and I had to use every effort to keep from humping my
dick further than one inch onto Sean's mouth. I had to move my hips in such
small thrusts and it was difficult since humping usually involved sliding
your dick repeatedly at eighty percent of the length.  My dick was a full
six inches and my groin was wondering why I wasn't in full fuck mode. I
heard him choke a couple of times when I felt my head touch the back of his
throat. "I'm sorry!" I would say but he would hold on and keep going. I was
getting closer and closer, getting sloppier with my thrusts, loving the
face that I was fucking into. I was choking Sean's throat too much now and
moved to pull my dick out, but he took a deep breath and put his mouth back
onto it. I kept going after that and didn't stop to apologize anymore. I
got sloppier and I felt him gag more now, but he was determined even though
I could feel my head hit the back of his throat with every hump.

"I'm gonna pull out when I cum." I moaned, "Close your eyes when I do!"

It felt so good that I decided I would keep humping until the very last
second. I even thought about just leaving it in while I climaxed. I felt
the numb electrifying sensation filling my dick and abdomen. My muscles
were quivering and tightening. My shaft was getting harder and harder and
my hips wanted to fuck harder and I was going into Sean's mouth a tiny
amount further than I should. I pulled back a little bit, but was still
making the fucking motion. I was in the very first part of the climax and
in a second I would shoot my load. I felt the first load beginning to shoot
and aevery part of my sexual being was telling me to keep humping into
him. I pushed my dick hard into Sean's throat then pulled my dick out
quickly. The first jet of cum went into Sean's mouth, I humped my dick
against the baby soft cheek of his face, letting another jet of cum land on
his ear. As the next jet was about to spray out of me, Sean's mouth clamped
back onto my dick. I gasped loud, not wanting to hurt Sean, but gave up
quickly. One hand gripped onto the back of his head, while the other hand
held onto my pumping dick, feeding my cumming dick into Sean's mouth. I
suppose it was my own dick's need for thrusting that made me give up
caution and hump into him harder. I felt him cough and gag against the tip
of my dick as I force fucked his mouth. The loads of my cum gushed out of
the sides of his mouth as I forced his head to stay on my shaft. All I
could do was grip and pump into him as my body twitched. He wasn't even
sucking anymore, just gagging and coughing against my piston head dick. I
pumped and convulsed slower and slower and let up on gripping Sean's
head. He moved his mouth back and coughed some more, spitting the cum out.

"I'm so sorry Sean." I said, suddenly feeling horrible for taking advantage
of him. "Are you okay?"

He still had the sour face on and spit some more cum out, then brushed his
forearm across his mouth. He caught his breath, coughing in between, then
pushed himself out from under me.

I held onto his arm, apologizing over and over again while he coughed, but
he yanked my arm away. When he was free of my grip, he stood in front of me
and coughed out the word, "Hurry."

I didn't understand what he meant until he stood on the couch and pointed
at his own hard dick, sticking his tongue out.

I felt a sigh and a laugh come out of me as I realized that Sean had gotten
himself all excited and was ready for my mouth again. "You're really okay?"
I asked.

Sean nodded his head and cleared his throat saying, "Do mine again."

I laughed again and stuck my tongue out. Since I was sitting and Sean was
standing on the couch, his dick was right at eye level for me. I hungrily
took his little stiffy back, mashing it between my tongue and the roof of
my mouth. He let out a yelp of pleasure and pushed his entire front against
my face. He held tight onto my head, almost bending over me and he began a
rhythmic fucking into my mouth. He was pulling so hard on my hair that it
was hurting. He picked up the pace pretty quickly and I grabbed onto his
butt, guiding his hips so that when he pumped out of my mouth, his dick
didn't go all the way out. My efforts to help him went out the door within
a few seconds. The speed that he was humping my face increased so fast that
some of his thrusts were landing his dick on my cheek or against my nose. I
might as well have been a stuffed animal or a pillow for humping.

As he rabbit fucked his hard little dick into my face Sean was repeatedly
grunting, which eventually lead to a teeth clenched growl. It was so hot
and I was so relieved that I hadn't hurt him, that I sat there, letting his
dick ramrod me hard. I ended up shutting my mouth tight so that he could
land on my face every time. Suddenly his pace slowed and he leaned forward,
staggering a bit on his foot hold. His boy grunt was now a long and
constant one as his humps were sloppy and weak. I knew he was cumming
again. I didn't expect it when he yanked hard onto my hair, and slammed his
throbbing little member into my face. He just kept mashing his pelvis
against me until I couldn't breathe at all. The suffocation felt great and
it filled my nose with the scent of Sean's hairless crotch. His legs shook
and jolted as his body pulsed at dry pumps against me. His stance quivered
with every involuntary cringe. As he slowed his humps, his grunting and
growling was less violent and more like small whimpers heard during sleep.

When he stopped humping altogether, he just stayed bent over me and I let
him. I took in every whiff of Sean's groin that I could, knowing that this
would be what I would jack off to every night from then on.  I opened my
eyes to watch his little hardon twitch as it still weakly tried to pump out
cum that wouldn't be there for years. I marveled as his jelly bean sized
nuts slowly lowered down and away from his body. I loved the way his legs
still slightly twitched with his dick.

Sean finally pulled himself off of me and laid back on the couch. I leaned
forward and landed several kisses on his cheeks as he caught his breath. As
his breathing relaxed more, I saw him close his eyes.

"You can't fall asleep." I whispered, shaking his shoulder gently.

"I'm not." Sean replied, keeping his eyes closed.

"Liar." I teased, lightly kissing each eye lid. "You have to use your super
brain to figure out how I can spend more time with you."

He shook his head, saying "Like I said, this was it."

I stopped him from saying anymore by covering his lips with my own. Our
tongues met and slid together. I felt a large weight on my chest as I
realized he was right, there was no solution. I considered running away and
hitchhiking three hundred miles to go and see him, but that wouldn't
last. Besides, my aunt and uncle would tell my mom and dad that they saw me
climbing into the next door neighbor's house. It was the same grim
situation for both of us. We were too young to do anything and by the time
I was old enough, Sean would still be too young to run off with me.

I pulled out of our kiss and said, "Wait three years for me."

"What?" Sean asked, studying my eyes.

"In three years I will be able to go to a college near where you live." I
felt my heart racing at the thought of a plan that would work. "Maybe I
could stay with my aunt and uncle while I went to school or something." I
wondered what Sean was thinking as he stared at me without expression.

Sean held onto my face with both hands, "In three years I'll be twelve
years old and you will be eighteen." He watched for my reaction, then
continued when he saw none, "A lot can happen in three years. You could get
a girlfriend or a boyfriend."

His adult words, spoken by a child, stabbed at me. I wondered if he was
purposely breaking things off with me because he didn't even want to keep
it going. I pulled away from him a bit, trying to decide his intentions.

"Or," I said, "you could find some one else too." I felt horrible all of a
sudden. I saw myself as the immature fifteen year old who couldn't let go
of a one night stand. The situation was strange because I had the feeling
that I was being rejected by a nine year old. It was a role reversal that
fucked with my head in a big way. But I couldn't help but wonder how our
connection seemed so much more important than just a chance meeting.

Sean must have seen the whirlwind of doubt that hammered away at my brain
and heart. His little hands grabbed at my head, pulling me close to him
again. He breathed sweet breath against me, "Do you ever read poetry?"

My mind was blank for an explanation as to why he was asking me this
question. "No." I replied.

"Poetry," He said, "Is on the other side of silent communication. It is
using language to say more than just words. It is igniting the brain with a
thousand creative truths with a single sentence."

I whispered into his face, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"For you," Sean breathed, " I would wait a thousand years. I am the
relieving breath to your lungs and you are the hot blood for my racing
heart. If you are the sun then I am the blue sky. If you are the rain then
I am the ground to receive you."

All I could do was stare open mouthed at Sean's poetry in my name. I felt
my face getting hot and and my pulse picking up. Moisture was building up
in my eyes, hearing him say the words that took the hurt away.

"The choice is yours." Sean said, "Say the word and I'll wait forever."
With that said, Sean pulled himself from under me and cleaned up by wiping
a blanket on himself. He didn't say another word, just put his clothing
back on and went to walk out.

I was going to let him go in silence, but yelled at the last second,
"Please wait for me!"

Sean put on a smile that looked like relief, but I wasn't exactly sure. He
walked out and closed the door. I could hear the padding of his bare feet
as he walked back to the house.

That night was tough as I tried to sleep without Sean's body to be soft and
warm against me. The tears kept coming back along with a panic. I knew that
Sean was only upstairs and wanted so badly to go up there and lay down with
him. I wanted to fall into a deep slumber with him in my arms, the way it
should be.

I finally began to fall asleep out of complete exhaustion around four in
the morning, but I kept jolting awake suddenly. In the back of my mind I
was haunted by the thought that I would sleep right through the family's
departure and I wouldn't get to see Sean one last time.

I startled awake at about nine o'clock and was relieved to see that no one
had left yet. My aunts and uncles were eating breakfast in the dining room
while my little cousins sat and watched tv on the floor only feet away from
me. I smiled, seeing Sean, sitting cross legged in the recliner just like
he was when I first met him. I smiled even wider as I caught his eye.

If we were alone, I would have run over and kissed him and hold him, but
there were so many people talking and laughing and zipping up their
luggage. I was hearing all of the noises that meant Sean would be leaving
soon.

I sat up on the couch, kicking the blanket off of me. I had an obvious case
of morning wood, but I didn't even care. I was staring at my love who was
only feet away, but he could have been three hundred miles away because I
couldn't show any affection for him.

"James!" I heard my mom say as she passed through to another room, "Cover
yourself!" She walked off without another word.

I looked at Sean, who was smiling wide and staring at my dick that poked a
tent in my sleeping shorts. I smiled back, but then noticed his smile fade
and I saw his face redden. There were tears building in Sean's eyes.

I covered up, feeling the same stabbing pain that Sean must have been
feeling. It was the pain of the knowledge that we would have to wait a long
time to be close again.

I eventually got up and cleaned up in the bathroom. I put on the previous
day's clothes and brushed my teeth. I was trying to come up with some way
to get Jamie alone for just a few minutes. My mind and heart ached to feel
my tongue on his just one last time, to hold me over for the long stretch
of waiting. I thought that my grandparents might have gotten their stuff
out of my room by now, and figured that I could just ask Sean to sneak up
there. My door locked up there and I could kiss him and maybe suck on him
or grab at the sweet spot between his legs.

I exited the bathroom, hearing the dreaded sound of car keys. I felt like I
had been gut kicked as I saw people hugging each other and saying
goodbye. My eyes darted around trying to figure out which family was
leaving, but it was hard to tell. It looked like they were all leaving. My
breathing picked up as I searched around family to find Sean.

I felt soft fingers grab onto my hand. When I turned around, my heart
jumped with excitement, seeing that Sean was the one holding my hand. His
little face was red and he was certainly crying. "Thanks for the fun
party." He said, obviously trying to hold in his emotion. My cousins were
standing right next to Sean, waiting to say goodbye to me as well.

I was stunned and without speech, realizing that this was the last time I
could have with Sean and it was in front of everyone. I knelt down in front
of him, holding onto his cheeks and wiping away the tears. "You keep being
smart okay?" I said, feeling the knot in my throat and my own tears coming
on.

I felt Sean's silent shudders as he began to cry more, his lips formed a
frown and he nodded in response to what I had said.

My aunt Trudy passed by, putting a hand on Sean's shoulder asking, in a
motherly voice, "What happened?"

"He says he hit his head." My cousin Paul said loudly before Sean could
answer, "But I think he's lying."

I knew damn well that he hadn't hit his head. He was smart but maybe not
strong enough to say goodbye to something that meant a lot to both of us.

More family came up to hug me and talk to me before leaving. As people
crowded around in the living room, I lost sight of Sean. Wondering where he
had gone to. People were taken by surprise at how sad I appeared to be
because they were all leaving. I nodded and tried to move away from all of
them.

Everyone was leaving at once and I went outside with them, searching for
Sean. I saw my aunt guiding my cousins into their minivan, she had her hand
on Sean's shoulder, ready to point him to his seat. I ran over quickly and
got their as Sean sat in the seat by the window. I hugged my aunt Trudy,
looking over her shoulder to see Sean's crying eyes. The sliding door was
still open and I asked my aunt, "You guys are coming back next year right?"
I kept my eyes on Sean waiting for her answer.

"Yes, of course hon." She said, "Every year!"

I kept hugging her, and looking at Sean intently. I saw the realization hit
his wide eyes as I repeated my aunt's words, "Every year."

I tried to convey a strong message to Sean with my eyes, 'Stay friends with
them and you won't have to wait three years to see me!

My aunt and uncle closed all the doors and started the minivan. My cousins
smacked each other on the heads and fought over something, while Sean just
stared at me through the window. The van pulled away and I saw Sean's palm
on the window. His eyes closed tight and he shuddered with a cry.