Date: Fri, 30 Sep 2005 19:11:10 -0700 (PDT)
From: William Cordova <wcordova98@yahoo.com>
Subject: William Cordova - Chapter Seventeen...

Disclaimer

This story contains acts of the sexual nature between underage boys.  If
you do not like this type of story, or it is illegal in the area in which
you live, do not read any further.

************************************************************************

Author's Note: Sorry about any mistakes grammer/typ/incorrect statements in
this chapter.  My computer bombed on Monday and I haven't really had access
to do anything this week related to my story...I haven't proof read this
chapter because of this but I'll post it anyways because I know so many are
counting on the Friday posting...Have fun with this chapter...


Chapter Seventeen: The Knife Digs Deeper

About a week ago I had a dream that literally woke me up in the middle of
the night.  I was sweating from the forehead and my nose was running.

I was walking through the hall of the school I had hardly seen before, with
its pink-maroon lockers and dark beige brick.  I was weaving through the
maze of hallways and students looking for Matt.  All the faceless people
were bickering and yelling, going about their normal school life.  I saw
girls dressed like they were prostitutes, much too old to be in high
school.  I saw men with full blown beards and taller then normal, skying
over the lockers.  The hallways seemed not to have roofs, with the summer
heat bearing down in at me, only baking me, but gently warming everyone
else.

I scurried along in a frantic pace, looking, yelling for Matt.  I ran past
many kids of unknown faces, unknown clothes styles and unknown language.  I
ran into a stairwell, where I went up and up.  I ran past three or four
floors and existed out to some sophisticated upstairs rooms, with fancy
chairs and tables.  Chalkboards lined the walls and a desk in the corner,
behind it sitting some lady in red.  I recognized her as the devil in red.
It was uncanny at how similarly familiar she looked.

I moved quickly past her and the room exiting into a hallway where many
more students where making noise.  I saw Matt over in the corner.  I ran
quickly grabbing his shoulder, turning him around.

"Matt!  Thank god I found you."

"Who are you?  What is your problem?"

"Matt.  It's me."

"Get away from me, I don't know you."  He turned around and ran through the
jungle of students dispersing almost magically into thin air.  I ran fast
after him, but he was gone.  I stood in silence as the faceless, yet
bearded overgrown guys and sluttish girls stared directly back at me.  Soon
everyone broke out in laughter.  I ran back into the sophisticated room
where I saw Anthony talking to the devil woman in red.

"Anthony!" I yelled.  No response from anyone.  I yelled his name again
with no response.  I ran over to him shaking his shoulders repeating his
name.

He didn't respond at all and the devil woman asked me what my problem was
and to leave the young man alone.

I looked back at him and yelled his name again.  He turned his head away
then back at me and said "Do I know you?"

I just stared and my hands started burning against his skin.  His shirt was
suddenly gone and his skin was turning red, heat vapors venting from him.

That's when I woke up, panting and sweating.  It couldn't fall back to
sleep that morning.  This was the fourth of fifth dream like this -- all
similar in the aura of message.  I always saw the devil woman in red, and
everyone was always faceless but Anthony and Matt.  The school always felt
like it was a maze, with endless hallways and ceilings so high, it blurred
into the sky.

In reality, I had only been inside Langham Creek High School once, during
Roberts's freshman orientation some years ago.  I vaguely remember anything
about it, except the color of the lockers and bricks.  The stood out as a
common theme in all of my dreams.

This last dream was the worst.  It was only a week until the start of
school, the start of a new adventure, in which my mother likes to call the
best four years of one's life.


The first day of school, I woke up at five-fifteen.  I was not use to
waking up this early, but I had to.  I had to catch the bus to school for
the first time since elementary.  I lived only a fifteen minute walk from
Jr. High, but a good half-hour by bus from High School.

Ben gets to sleep in another hour at least.  It sucks to even think that
waking up at six-fifteen is sleeping in.  I only woke up extra early
because it is wise to get out to the bus stop extra early on the first few
days until a regular routine and schedule is established.  I took extra
time in the shower, paying close attention to my morning stiff, caressing
it between the fingers of my left hand, with the help of a nice lathered
hand.

It took me a rather long time to get off this time.  My mind kept jumping
back to the uncertainty of the day.  On several occasions I got so caught
up in thought I completely went soft.  I had to force myself to really dig
deep down and concentrate, thinking of the soft smooth skin of Matt's dick
in my hand, the light course pubic hair brushing up against my hand.  The
wrinkly powdered skin of his ballsac and the smooth hide of his ass, with
crisp water running down his crack -- that got my off in no time.  Matt was
maturing in his body just as if it were in my mind.  I couldn't create such
maturity better if I was doing it myself, like God.

I was gone and out the door before Ben even woke up.  I had a hearty
breakfast, I wanted to be fully awake and aware for my first day -- plus I
don't do well when I'm anxious and have an empty stomach.  I arrived at the
bus stop to find three kids standing there already.  The High School bus
stop was at the far end of my street.  I had to walk the full length of the
street to get there, in comparison to before; I would walk the opposite
direction to get to Jr. High.  One of the kids was smoking.  I was
surprised by this.  It was definitely going to be different then Jr. High.

I stood behind them, more along the sidewalk up closer to the house.  I
awaited the bus, which didn't arrive for another twenty minutes.  The bus
ride was long and horrendous.  I hate the bus but I can't get around it now
that High School is here.

I arrived in the school auditorium looking for Anthony or Matt, or even
anyone I knew.  It was packed.  I had learned from the freshman orientation
weeks prior that our freshman class was the largest in school history --
over one thousand students.  I looked and looked to no avail, finding
neither of them.  I got my schedule and sat in an empty chair next to some
kids I didn't know.

The Vice principal went through some basic stuff, explaining the room
numbering system to better help us find our classrooms.  I looked for them
during the boring announcements, but couldn't recognize any faces beyond
those closely around me.

I looked over my schedule.  I had English 1st, my elective Bookkeeping 2nd,
Chemistry 3rd, Algebra 4th, Gym 5th, and History 6th.  I had a feeling I
was going to have trouble in English, being first period, the most boring
class and the one subject I have the most trouble in naturally, but at
least I'd end the day well.  Math my favorite subject, Gym always fun and
ending with History, a subject I usually enjoyed.  I looked over my
teachers and drew no significant breath from them.  I couldn't even
pronounce one of their names.

I looked at my locker assignment.  Locker number W1302.  I knew the `w'
meant west, since the school was split into east and west wings.  It is
shaped like the letter `V', except fat.  Each side a wing, the library,
cafeteria and offices in the middle.  The auditorium is located behind the
cafeteria, which is where I am not now, day dreaming about what
possibilities I have of getting a class with Matt or Anthony.  Still
neither of them I've seen since freshman orientation.

First period was boring.  Ms. Williams seemed nice, but it's English
nonetheless.  I recognized a few kids in the class, but no one in there
stood out as being cute in my book.  Second period was interesting.  Third
period came and the teacher, Mrs. Gammel, was fat -- pregnant fat.  She was
due and talked about it.  She would be leaving in about three months at
which time we'd get a full time substitute until the end of the semester.
Second semester would be with a different teacher who'd teach Intro to
Physics.  I think I'm going to enjoy this class after all.  Usually I don't
enjoy science classes.  Neither 2nd nor 3rd periods didn't help any in the
friends department.  I knew of only a few of the kids, and directly knew
none of them.

Forth period came and boy I was happy.  Alberto O'Conner from one of my
classes in the past was there.  I admired him, or should I say his body.
He was cute for sure.  Math will be easy this year, I could tell right from
the first day.  I have always been good in Math, and the teacher,
Mrs. Kinkaid, seemed like the type of teacher who will go over everything
ten times.  Since the Math class is located in a certain location, it is
determined that the class would have 2nd lunch.  Lunch is apparently done
by class location based on 4th period.  The teacher explained this to the
class.  The class would be split in half by lunch.  On days of test, we'd
each during 3rd lunch so we'd have a full forty-five minutes for the test.
Seemed stupid to me, but that's how the school runs it.  When the bell rang
for us to go to lunch, I decided it'd be a good time to find my locker,
since I knew it was somewhere in the same area, both in the West hall.  It
was just around the corner from Math class.  Kind of convenient for me I
suppose.  I ate lunch with Al and two of his friends, Gary and Tyrone.
Neither of who I found attractive at all.  Gary has more hair on his legs
then I do on my head.  It was rather disgusting to me.  Tyrone was black.
I didn't have any interest in black boys, and he wasn't attractive at all
anyways.  But they were cool kids I didn't mind eating lunch with.  I did
scan the lunch room looking for Anthony or Matt, still neither I've ran
into yet all day.  I was losing hope in having a class with one of them.

Fifth period gym was also going to be exciting, just by the mere fact that
I'd get to see boys changing cloths -- why else?  When I entered the gym,
students were everywhere, gathering in the bleachers for the start of
class.  I sat down at the front by the door after scanning the crowd for
anyone I knew.  As before, Anthony and Matt where nowhere to be found.
Soon after, one of the Coaches told everyone to split into sections based
on who their coach was.  I sat in the area designated for Coach Weisner's
group.  Right behind me was a group of kids who I didn't know.

"Hey dude" I heard from behind.  I wasn't sure if the kid was talking to me
so I didn't respond.  "Hey dude?" the kid said again.

I turned around to look and he kid was looking at me.  I gave a questioning
look. "Hey."

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Will."

"What school you come from?"

"Watkins."

"You're with Coach Weisner?"

"Yes."

"Cool.  I'm Eddie, this is Jeff and Mitch.  Why you sitting alone?" Eddie
asked.

"I don't know anyone here."

"Well you do now."  The group laughed.

"Where ya'll from?" I asked.

"Labay." Mitch said.

Labay was the `rich' school -- the school which was stereotyped as being
full of rich prep kids.  Most the students who attended Labay came from
Copperfield, an upscale neighborhood compared to the neighborhoods that
attended Truitt or Watkins.  We talked for the remainder of the class
period and parted for 6th period when the bell rang.

I walked into World History I as it was officially called on my schedule
and when I entered I saw Eddie standing over in the corner.  I walked over
to him and said "You're in this class too?"

"Yup."

"Cool."  I sat down next to him and the class started.  Mrs. Zolynski, as
best as I can pronounce it, started talking about class.  She said we could
call her Mrs. Z for short, thank god.

"This class is going to be so easy" Eddie said.

"Really?  I like history and all, but it really depends on the teacher."

"That's why it's going to be easy."

"You know about Mrs. Z?"

Just then she interrupted us.  "Boys stop talking please.  It's rude."

Eddie nodded indicating he knew the teacher.  "I'll tell you later" he
whispered.

A little later in class, the teacher made us do `introductions.'  Each
student had to stand up, give his or her name and a little bit about
themselves.

Eddie went right before me.  "Hi, my name is Eddie.  I came from Labay and
like sports, mainly basketball, but any sport will do for me.  Some day I'd
like to be a CEO of some major company and make lots of money."  That made
the class laugh.

I stood up when Eddie was done.  "Hello.  I'm Will Cordova.  I came over
from Watkins Jr. High.  I really like sports too, mostly basketball.  I am
usually shooting hoops after school, or tossing a football.  Some day I'd
like to become a lawyer, and if that doesn't work out, I want to be a good
attorney to fall back on."  I said that as a joke, seeing how many got it.
Only the teacher and a few kids laughed.  I really didn't want to be a
lawyer.  I had no idea what I really wanted to do in life.  Why should I
even care at this point?  I only talked about what I wanted to do because
that's sort of how other students worded their introductions to class.  It
kind of just spread.

I sat down a tad be embarrassed that my joke didn't work very well.  Eddie
got lots of laughs with his joke.  Once all the kids were done, the teacher
sat down at her desk and started working on some stuff.

Some students started making small talk to I leaned over and asked Eddie
what he knew about the teacher.

"Mrs. Zolynski."  He said her name perfectly I took notice.  "She's Mitch's
mom."

"Mitch, you're friend?"

"Yup."

"So you like know her personally?"

"Yup.  She makes great hamburgers."

We talked a little bit more about Mrs. Z.  Turns out Eddie has known her
ever since he met Mitch back in 6th grade.  Mrs. Z started to call names,
issuing textbooks all the while there was talking amongst the students.
This class didn't seem shy at all.  In my morning classes, when there was
down time, no one said a word.  Everyone just sat in silence.  This class,
practically everyone was talking, joking and goofing around.

When class ended, we split apart.  I went to my locker, dropped off my one
book and got on my bus, my big fat ugly yellow bus.  I sat in the same seat
as on the way to school.  I took this time to think through what happened
today and what High School has brought on me.  I didn't have a single class
with Anthony or Matt.  I didn't even once see them all day long.  I suppose
there is still a chance they could have the same lunch as me, I just didn't
see them today.  There are literally hundreds upon hundreds of students in
there.

Eddie seemed alright, as well as his friends.  Jeff seemed the cutest,
probably because he looked the least eldest.  He wore jeans so I didn't get
a look at anything of his.  Eddie seemed the oldest with his slight
mustache, much like my own.  Mitch was ok looking, nothing spectacular.  He
didn't speak much so I don't know much about him.  He seems shy.  Overall
I'd' say they are going to be nice friends to have in gym, but they aren't
Matt and Anthony.

When I got home, I realized just how much things really sucked.  Benjamin
was already home.  Not only does he get to sleep in longer, but he gets
home sooner -- double whammy.  I dropped my bags off and decided to go see
Ian.  I hadn't spoken to him in weeks; the last time was about High School.
Ian answered the door.  "Hey Will."

"Hey.  How was school?"

"It was alright.  The school's huge though.  I got lost like ten times."

I laughed.  "So did I."

"Don't laugh.  I'm serious."

"And I'm serious too.  I got lost all the time.  Let me see your schedule."
Ian dug through his backpack and handed it to me.  I skimmed over to see
where his classes were, comparing them to mine.  "Where's your locker?" I
asked.

"I don't know."

"Didn't you get a locker assignment?"

"Yes, but I have no idea where it is."

I looked behind his schedule and found his locker assignment -- E902.  I
didn't know where that was except on the opposite side of school then mine
was. "I have a west locker.  Maybe we could share lockers so we don't have
to go as far for our books.  Like keep the books you need in the locker
that's closest to that class.  Know what I mean?"

"The Vice Principal said not to share lockers."

"They just say that to scare you.  What you say?"

"I dunno."

"How about this.  Remember where the auditorium was.  Meet me there
tomorrow morning.  Just when you get off the bus, I'll be there, or wait
for me.  I'll wait for you.  Then I'll show you where my locker is and you
can use it if you want.  Then we'll find your locker, ok?"

Over the summer, I had spent more time with Ian then Matt I believe.
Shortly before Matt's 14th birthday party, I was sneaking over to his house
as I've done on several occasions earlier in the summer, but this time when
I stopped for a drink at the convenience store, I nonchalantly left my bike
just leaning against the store window.  I didn't plan to be in there long
except I saw they had a new arcade game.  I couldn't help try it out.  I
must have spent at least three dollars in quarters playing it.

When I went back out, my bike was gone.  I was pissed and shocked all
wrapped in a tight noose.  I couldn't very well tell the truth about how it
was stolen, as it would let on what I had been doing all summer.  I was
closer to Matt's house so I went over to his house anyways.  I left his
house a full hour fifteen before my parents were supposed to be home.  I
did make it home in time; however, it pretty much ruined my summer.  I
never attempted to sneak over to his house again that summer.

I pretended I was clueless about what happened to my bike.  My parents
asked me about it two weeks later, I denied knowing what happened.  I tried
to get a new bike, but my parents said they couldn't afford a new one any
time soon.

The last time I saw Matt was on his birthday, at his party with Anthony.
We did what we usually did while at his parties -- pool cake presents and a
sleepover.  We stayed up so late that we feel asleep before getting ready
for bed, negating any chance to fool around with Matt.

This led to more time with Ian.  We were friends to a good degree basically
because of our location to each other.  On days where I was really bored,
I'd go on over to his house.  Sometimes we'd do homework together, help
each other out and he even tutored me in the finer arts of the English
language.

After only my second trip to his house after my bike going bye-bye, I
decided I wanted to play some video games and invited him over to my house.
He'd been to my house only a few times, and that was for homework.  He
immediately took interest in the games I liked.

Ian agreed to share lockers.  We talked a little bit longer before I went
home.  He was still only 12 years old and in High School.  He didn't look
as young as that though.  Only after one day of High School I figured out
there was a wide range of kids.  I saw plenty of very small kids that look
young, and plenty of older, much more maturing students.  Ian didn't seem
to stand out in my mind as being 12, but just as one of the students who
mature later then most.  I was hoping that wouldn't cause him situations of
discomfort in school.  As far as I knew, he didn't get picked on in
Jr. High, so my hopes were up that he wouldn't now.

I called Matt when I got back home.  We talked a little bit, sharing our
schedules and some of our first day's experiences.  He seemed disappointed
that we didn't have any classes together, nor lunch.  He had first lunch
which meant I'd never see him.  He told me about some of his classes, who
was in them, some of his teachers and stuff.  It helped me in a way.  It
made me feel more comfortable knowing what he was going to be doing at
school.  We figured we'd see each other eventually and get a regular
routine down.

The following Monday I woke up late.  I hit the snooze alarm about four
times.  I had to rush to make it to the bus stop in time, rush so much I
skipped breakfast.  My mother yelled at me, but I didn't care.  I wasn't
looking forward to English or Bookkeeping.  I swear to God I hate that
crap.  Gym is what I was really looking forward to though.  It was the
first day we'd be dressing out.  First impressions are important and I was
pumped for the impressions Jeff was going to give off.

I walked into the locker room with Eddie and Mitch already there.  Eddie
was talking shit to Mitch about stuff that apparently only concerned them
two.  I moved past Eddie, lightly brushing up against him to get to my
locker at the end of the row.  Mitch's locker is directly across from mine.
I opened my locker, taking two times to get the combination right.  I
looked over at Eddie, noticing he wasn't shy about anything.  It reminded
me of Matt in a way.  He was standing there in his blue boxers and white
ankle-short socks just chatting away with Jeff, who was now there.  I
couldn't really make out exactly what they were talking about over the
noise of a few hundred kids making all kinds of noise.  There were two
other kids between me and him, neither of whom I would want to look at --
one black boy and some Latino.

"Eddie says your mom makes great hamburgers" I asked Mitch.

Mitch laughed.  "If Ed says so.  I don't think they're that great."  Mitch
already had his gym shorts on, but was still bare-chested.  I noticed he
had a small bushel of hair under his arms and his skin was much paler then
most kids.  "You'll have to see for yourself some day" Mitch said.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"Nothing" Mitch replied.

I finished dressing and headed for the gym.  I got out there and leaned
against the matted-wall by where my coach's class is to be for roll call.
Eddie and Mitch, then Jeff joined me shortly after.

This was the first time I got a good look at Jeff. His shorts showed off
plenty.  His legs were thin and smooth, with no signs of hair.  His arms
were much the same as his legs.  When he sat down, his shorts fell down
from gravity towards his hips which exposed his thighs which I might add,
where very good looking.  His shoes caught my attention too.  I had seen
and marveled at them since day two.  They were of a very nice fashion --
fashion far beyond what my parents would pay for.

After roll call, all the girls head to the small gym for the days
activities.  The coaches let the boys just have a free day.  That means
basketball.  Things didn't seem much different then Jr. High gym class
except for the amount of students.  The large gym has 6 basketball goals
and when things got started, it was easy to tell the cliques.  The older
boys, sophomores grabbed the main courts.  Suppose that is some sort of
right of age deal.  The lowly freshmen and the not-so-good upper class
students took the outer courts.  I just walked over with Eddie and his
friends when they picked the court closest to the locker room.

Some other boys joined us.  I recognized a few from last year; some seemed
to be familiar with Eddie and Mitch.  Once the game got going, I knew Eddie
was good.  He made his shots, dribbled well, and played defense well.  Jeff
was ok as was Mitch.  It was a good game and I really enjoyed it.  My mind
stores information well for later remembrance.  Playing basketball, my mind
is focused solely on it, but later at night, lying in bed, my mind will
take me back to the physical contact, the smells and sounds of the game.

The game was physical and competitive enough that I broke a sweat, but not
so much that I was dripping facet.  I used my gym shirt to relieve me of my
problem.  In the locker room after the game, Mitch offered me so of his
cologne.  I declined as I'm not much of a cologne person.  I've only worn
it twice.  Both were when Anthony offered it.  Mitch was like that.  He was
a big cologne and jewelry person.  He wore a golden ring and a matching
necklace.  I hadn't worn my necklace I received from Mr. and Mrs. Ducker
since that night I got it.  I like that.  I think it made him look sharper
and more attractive as a boy and I'm sure it drove the girls wild.  It
touched me in a weird place, someplace between my dick and heart.



I fell into a regular routine with Eddie and company.  History is by far a
fun class.  Mrs. Z is fun and Eddie likes to play off their relationship
outside of school.  I spent lunch with Alberto and his friends and in gym I
become more fascinated with Jeff.  I didn't have a great view of him in the
locker room at all.  He was across the row and down at near the front.  It
pained me thinking I could look at him in his undies, but couldn't risk it.

Some of the boys in the locker room liked to joke and play around about the
influences of the faggot.  They'd joke that one of them was gay and
everyone would pick on that person for the day.  Some sophomores did that
to Eddie one day.  The made weird voices and made fun of him.  It was all
in good fun I could tell and Eddie just ate it up, playing right back.  It
didn't bother him at all.

Some of the other boys didn't take it was well.  It was never more then
joking and fooling around.  No one ever got hurt physically or emotionally
as it was always just a one day thing.  Most of it was just talk -- things
like sucking cock, grabbing ass or having boyfriends, shit like that.  No
one ever got pantsed or even touched for that matter.  It was pretty clear
who the target for these events were -- the freshmen.  I knew my day was
coming.  I just hoped I'd be in a good mood and just go along with the
jokes and not take anything personal and lash back.

One a Friday, we were hanging out by our lockers.  It was Eddie Jeff and I.
Seven minutes between classes leaves for some good social talks.

"Hey guess what guys?" Eddie said.

"What?"

"I signed up for Drivers Ed during lunch today."

"What?" I was shocked.

"Yeah.  I'm going to be taking some classes after school and in 6 weeks I
can get my permit."

"Cool" Jeff said.

"Don't you have to be fifteen to sign up for that?" I asked, still
perplexed.

"Of course.  I am fifteen already."

Jeff broke in "Dumbass here failed fifth grade.  He turned fifteen before
school started."  Eddie leaned over and punched Jeff on the arm.  We broke
out in laughter.  It sure did explain some things.

"Mom said she'd get me a car when I turned sixteen.  So maybe next year
I'll be driving to school."

"And I thought I was the only dumbass.  I was sure I was the oldest
freshman around here." I said.

"You failed too?" Eddie asked.

"Not really.  I went through 2nd grade twice because of speech problems.  I
turned fifteen in October."

"You going to sign up for Drivers Ed later then?  They have another session
in November."

"Maybe" I said.

"Only maybe?  What?  You don't want to get your license?"  I dropped my
head and looked at the ground.  "What's up Will?"

"My parents said I have to wait until I'm seventeen."

"What?  What for?  The government says sixteen year olds can drive.  What's
up with your parents?  What a bunch of jerks."  Eddie blurted out.

"Shut up will you already" I yelled back.

"Dudes chill out." Jeff jumped in.

"I don't want to talk about it ok?" I jerked out.  I just looked at them,
both staring straight back.  I turned around and walked to class.  I didn't
look back.  I felt queasy inside.  My mind was racing on my brother's
images.  I couldn't bare myself to tell them about him.  I almost had a
tear in my eye as I walked through the masses of bodies, not paying
attention to anything in front of me or around me.

I heard my name coming from behind but didn't look back.  I just kept
walking.  I got to class and sat down in my seat.  Only then did I realize
how stupid I was being.  I heard my name again.

"Will."

I turned in my seat and saw Jeff standing in the doorway.  "What?"

He didn't respond.  He stood there kind of uneasy.  I got up and walked
over to him.  We moved outside the doorway and down the hall a few feet.
"What do you want Jeff?"  I had eased my angered tone a little.

"Dude, that was wicked.  What the fuck was that all about?"

"I said I didn't want to talk about it."

"Ok but you don't need to snap like that either if you're not going to talk
about it."  Just then the warning bell rang and gave me a way out.  I just
looked at Jeff, arms crossed, leaning up against the wall.  He reached up
and scratched his nose.  It was an awkward moment just looking at him,
having him look right back.  I gazed down at the ground and back up.  He
reached down and adjusted his crotch.  I must have turned red when Jeff
caught me noticing.  I pretended to look at a clock somewhere.

"You better get to class or you'll be late."  I turned around and went back
in.  I sat silent waiting for class to begin.  I felt a bit embarrassed now
that I realized I was just watching him.  I wasn't sure what I was really
doing or if he cared or even noticed except for when he scratched his
crotch.  I thought about that several times -- his crotch, being moved
about by his little white fingers.  He has some interesting fingers.  In
fact, the more I think about it, the more his fingers adjusting his crotch
in my mind, the more I liked his hands.  He didn't bite his nails, leaving
perfect little finger nails.  I pictured his fingers and perfect nails
running through his pubic hairs, scratching deep in the crevasse of crotch.

My dick attempted to stand at attention, but painfully was pinched down by
my jeans.  I looked around to see if anyone was watching me.  I adjusted
myself to allow my dick to get fully hard.  I heard what I though was Matt.
I jerked my head and perked up looking out the doorway.  I watched and
watched.  It must have been someone else, someone that sounds familiar to
Matt.  In that short time, I came to realize I hadn't seen him in quite
awhile.

I thought about Matt through most of that class and into the following
classes until Gym came.  I was lazy getting to gym on purpose.  I wanted to
come in right before the bell, in order to hopefully have to pass a
half-naked Jeff.  I had become frustrated at the inaccessibility of vision
of him during changing time; I had to do something to change that.  I
figured I'd come into the locker room later then I normally have been.
Hopefully, I'll get a good look at him shirtless, or in his boxers -- who
knows.

I hung out by myself waiting for the warning bell.  When it rang, I walked
toward the gym and got into the locker room when most kids were already
there.  A few were already heading out to the gym.  When walked in, I
started down my aisle and when some kid moved out of the way, I saw Jeff,
standing there just chatting away with Eddie and some other kids.  My
disappointment was quick when I noticed he had already changed.

"Hey" Jeff said as I walked by.

"Hey." I said in return, taking a glance back at him.

I got to my locker and removed the lock.  I felt as though I was being
watched -- through a telescope.  I looked over my shoulder.  Mitch was
standing there, shirtless, just looking at me.  I returned my focus to my
clothes-changing duties.  A moment later I looked over my shoulder and
again Mitch was just looking at me.  "What do you want?" I blurted out.

"Nothing."

"Then do I have a booger hanging from my nose or something?"

Mitch laughed.  "No."

"Then stop looking at me."

"You're crazy, you know that?"

I stood up and turned to him, removing my shirt.  "What I do now?" I asked.

"What you get all pissed about earlier?"

I sighed.  "Nothing really.  It was stupid."

"Like is said -- crazy."

Gym went by quickly with a fun game of basketball as did History.  However
in History, my mind went back to Matt.  Back to all the time I had spent
with him.  Lying in bed next to him -- touching his arm, his leg and his
dick, stroking back and forth -- caressing his lips with mine, sharing our
tongues.  I panned through all the times I saw him naked and through all
the times he snuggled up next to me.  I felt awkward.  I don't know what it
was.  I almost felt like I missed him.  I actually missed him.  High School
sucked.  I never get to see him.

When I got home, Benjamin was in his room doing stuff -- stuff I didn't
care for.  I called up Matt to talk to him but there was no answer.  I let
it ring but no one answered.  I looked at the clock -- it was only
three-thirty.  It was extremely frustrating not having a bike or any means
to get over to Matt's house.  I would have to call him again later because
I was feeling awkward about not being able to speak with him.  I felt
lonely not being with him.

I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling, watching the shadow's of the
ceiling fan go round and round.  It was completely dark and the house was
silent.  Benjamin was in bed already and my parents retired to their room
for the night.  I started to get hot so I removed my covers and turned the
fan in my direction.

I got thinking about Anthony in particular for some reason and remember
back to the time Matt and I spent the night at his house.  He told us he
tried sleeping naked once and loved it.  I never got around to trying that,
but decided tonight might be a good opportunity.  I removed my boxers and
laid completely naked in the dark.  I immediately got hard from the freedom
my crotch was exposed to.  I started playing with myself to the thought of
Matt and his beautiful body, the body I hadn't seen in over a month.

Just then the thought hit me that I forgot to call him up tonight.  I got
playing games and watching TV it totally slipped my mind.  I sighed at my
forgetfulness.  But I wasn't going to let that spoil my moment -- my own
personal moment of bliss with just me, the dark the open breeze from my
fans and Matt -- the perfect Matt that my mind conjured up just for me.

I shot particularly harder then normal probably because of the new
experience of the moment.  I'm use to being covered in sheets or running
hot water when jacking off.  There was something that felt dangerous about
how I did it this time.

I cleaned up and turned on my side to go to sleep but my eyes were prompted
open by the low glow of my clock.  The worst part is it illuminated just
enough to see the objects on my table.

I just stared.  I reached over and picked up my emerald green necklace.
All I could make out was the shape, but I knew what it was.  I moved it
close to my face, touching my lips up to it.  I had only worn it a few
times since Mrs. Ducker gave it to me.  I don't know why, I am just not
much of a jewelry person.  I felt myself tear up thinking of Matt.  I
missed him quite a bit and now I was feeling almost a withdrawal from him.
I slipped the necklace on and went to bed.

*****************************************************************************
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