Date: Wed, 05 May 1999 12:36:02 -0500
From: "K. Neil" <thepoet_jwf@email.com>
Subject: Young Mathew by K. Neil

The last day of school.  It should be declared a national holiday.
Mathew wondered what the summer would bring as he fought his way toward
the front doors and the freedom that awaited him.  He couldn't help but
think that this summer would differ from all others.  How?  He wasn't
exactly sure, but he knew that it would.  Maybe it was because he was a
teenager now.  Maybe because he had made some really good friends over
during this last school year.  Maybe it was because he was finally being
honest with himself, he was gay.  He knew it.  He especially knew it
when he looked at Cary Tally.
	Cary Tally was an eighth grader.   Cary was tall, blue-eyed, and
stunning.  He was also fifteen and not even aware of Mathew's
existence.  That didn't hinder Mathew's fantasies though.  He could
easily see himself being seduced by Cary.  He would lie in his bed at
night and imagine what it would be like to kiss him, to touch him, to
feel his entire body.  They were only dreams, but then again, they were
all he had.
	Arriving home Mathew found that he would be alone for the afternoon.
The note on the table said that Mom would be out shopping until six.
Throwing his backpack into the chair in the living room, Mathew sat down
to watch some television.  This privilege was not usually his.  After
school every day he was made to go to his room and finish his homework
before anything else could be done, but seeing that today was the last
day of school, and seeing that Mom wasn't around to object, Mathew saw
nothing wrong with his actions.
	Just when Mathew had gotten wrapped up in the program the doorbell
rang.  Instead of getting up to answer it he yelled for the person to
come in.  The door opened and in came Randy.  Randy was Mathew's best
friend.  They had been buddies since kindergarten and had done
everything together ever since.  Randy found his place on the sofa and
sat quietly watching television until the program was over.
	"Hey Ran.  What's up?"  Mathew asked finally noticing his friend.
	"I don't know.  Wanta go do something?"
	"Sure, dude.  What?"
	"My Mom gave me some money, wanna go down to the arcade?"
	"Yeah, sounds cool."  Mathew turned the TV off and they were on their
way to the arcade.
	Once there they played the usual machines, spent all of Randy's money,
and had about four Cokes.  Just as they were leaving Mathew noticed that
Cary was playing one of the machines in the corner.  Mathew had never
had the nerve to go up and talk to him before.  `What now'  he thought.
This was it.  He was going to talk to him.
	"Hey Cary, what's up?"  Mathew asked feeling a lump rise in his
throat.  No response.  Try again.  "Are you winning?  That's a tough
game.  See, I'm the one who got the top score.  Did that about month
ago."
	"Cool." Hey it was something.  He actually spoke. Not anything that
could be confused with even acknowledgment, but nonetheless a response.
	"Okay, see you later, Cary."  Mathew was beaming.  He had done it, he
had talked to Cary Tally-Dream man.
	"What's up with that?"  Randy asked a little annoyed about being left
at the doorway.
	"Just someone I know."
	"Oh, who is it?  I don't know him."
	"Oh, his name's Cary.  He goes to our school.  An eighth grader."
Mathew was floating.  He was on cloud nine.  Cary Tally had spoken to
him.
	"Oh, yippee, an eighth grader, big deal."  Mathew thought that he
detected a hint of jealousy in Randy's voice.
	Mathew and Randy busied themselves with television and conversation for
the remainder of the afternoon. It was much too hot to be outside.
Randy decided at one point that it was too hot so he removed his shirt.
Mathew had never noticed how nice Randy's body was.  He couldn't help
but stare and Randy seemed to not even take notice.  It was five o'
clock and the last of the good programs were just going off.  Mathew
turned off the TV and turned to Randy "What do you wanta do now?"
	"I don't know.  Let's go in your room and play with computer."
	"Okay, cool."  They made their way to Mathew's room.  The computer was
on a desk in the far corner of the room and the bed sat directly in
front of it.  Mathew took his place on the bed where he could watch what
Randy was doing on the computer.  Randy began looking around on the net
and just randomly checking out things that he or Mathew found
interesting.
	"Hey, Ran, want something to drink?"  Mathew asked getting up from the
bed and walking toward the door.
	"Sure."  He was too engrossed in the site he was checking out to
respond any further.  He finished there and decided he wanted to play a
game.  He clicked out of what he had been doing and disconnected.  Randy
wasn't sure which folder held the saved game that he had been playing
last time he was over so he decided to open a few and see if he could
find it.  The first one he saw was labeled Do Not Open.  That was
interesting.  Randy opened the folder expecting to find letters and
things that Mathew had written and didn't want anyone else to read, but
instead he found about fifty nude pictures of men.  `What the hell'  he
thought.  Were these Mathew's?  Why? As Randy looked at a few of them he
couldn't believe it.
	Mathew opened the door to his room and found Randy sitting at the
computer staring at the screen.  "What did you find?  Anything cool?"
He asked as he handed Randy the Coke he had gotten for him.  At that
moment Mathew realized what it was that Randy had found.  "Those aren't
mine."  He said defensively.
	"Who's are they?  Your Mom's?  I don't think so?"
	"Um...umm...ummm...you don't understand.  I mean...you don't..."
	"No, I get it now.  You're a fag.  I should have known.  You're a fag
aren't you?" Randy had a look of disgust on his face.
	At first Mathew thought he would cry, but when Randy became insulting
he found that he was pissed instead of embarrassed.  "What did you
say?"  He asked Randy.
	"I said you're a fag.  You get off looking at those pictures don't
you?" With that he pushed Mathew down on the floor.
	"What...?"
	"Shut up, faggot."  Randy was standing just inches from Mathew.  From
this level Mathew was at eye level with Randy's crotch.  He could see
that he was not the only one who could be aroused by those pictures.
	"I'm a faggot, huh?  I get off by looking at those pictures?  Then why
do you have that problem?"  Mathew pointed to a Randy's hard dick
showing through his thin shorts. "Why are you excited if it's so
disgusting?"  Randy was blushing.  He didn't what to do.
	"Shut-up!"  Randy screamed.  "Just shut-up!"  He couldn't help but look
at his friend.  Mathew stood there with his own tent beginning to show.
What had those pictures done to him?  Why was he like this?  Mathew was
his friend no matter what, but why was he excited by those pictures.
	Mathew saw the confusion that played across Randy's face.  Randy seemed
like he would cry.  Mathew wouldn't be able to take it if he cried.  He
wanted to be mad at Randy.  He wanted to hate him.  He wanted to, but he
couldn't.  "Hey man, I'm sorry.  I should have told you.  You are my
best friend and all.  I just thought that you would hate me and that you
wouldn't talk to me and that you would tell everybody."  With that said
Mathew began to cry.  This was the first person he had come out to.
"I'm sorry."  was all he could choke out between sobs.
	Randy stood above his friend and heard the words he was saying.  He
couldn't believe it, Mathew was gay.  His best friend was telling him
that he was gay and all he could do was stand there like a rock.  What
should he do?
	Mathew stood up and turned to leave the room.
"Mathew...ummm...I...sorry."
Randy put out his hand to show that he was trying to make a truce.
Mathew was reluctant, but accepted the gesture.  When he tried to let go
and leave the room Randy didn't let go.  Mathew looked up into Randy's
eyes.  They were weird, different. Randy stepped closer, still holding
Mathew's hand.  "I want to kiss you"  He whispered.  Mathew was shocked
at the request and a bit dumbfounded.  Randy didn't wait for a response,
he softly pressed his lips to Mathew's.
	Mathew had never been kissed before.  He had imagined it many times.
He had dreamed of being kissed by Cary Tally, but he had never even
thought about Randy.  Randy was his best friend.  Mathew was in such
shock that he failed to respond.
	Randy felt Mathew pull away.  `Oh shit' He thought.  `What the hell am
I doing?'
He quickly let go of Mathew's hand and turned away from him.  "I'm
sorry...I don't..."
	Mathew touched his friend's shoulder  "Randy."  Randy turned around to
face Mathew  but could not look him in the eyes.  Mathew put his hand
under Randy's chin and lifted his face "Randy."  He kissed him.  This
time the kiss was mutually received.
	
	Well, I hope you guys liked the latest.  I'm sorry that I haven't
written in a while, but now I'm back.  This story will be an ongoing
series until I run out of places to take Mathew.  I truly appreciate all
the e mails that I received from the other two stories(Time With Tim &
Finding Brandon - also here in young-friends)  they  were wonderful and
very encouraging. Thank you guys.
	I also want to mention that I have a new email address.  You may now
contact me at thepoet_jwf@email.com