Date: Sat, 30 Sep 2006 18:23:32 -0700
From: alisa mclaughlin <alisa_m@efn.org>
Subject: Read This and Write

It doesn't matter what genre you're writing, there are basic rules every
writer should consider. If you want others to read your writing, enjoy it,
give you positive feedback and possibly money if it's publishable then you
better correct the spelling and grammar, edit for content and
comprehension.  Here are a few suggestions to make your writing clearer and
easier on the reader.

If you are posting to a web site for the general public to peruse, don't
tell us this is your first attempt at writing. Never apologize for your
work.  If I read an intro where the writer says "Hey don't bother e-mailing
me about the grammar and punctuation etc." what he/she is saying is: " I
don't care about making my writing clear and legible" I don't even bother.
It's like being a carpenter and showing up without your tools. Buzz. Thank
you for playing. Next contestant.

Edit, edit, edit before sharing it with anyone or sending off to an
editor/site. Don't post a first draft, all first drafts are crap- I know
I've produced enough of them. Like a reducing a good sauce, boil it down to
it's essence through rewriting before showing it to anyone. Writing is
rewriting. Do it until it feels right. Get someone to proofread your work,
it's very hard to spot errors in your own writing. Being so close to it can
make you unaware of glaring faults of logic or missteps in language. Use
proper English and follow the rules of grammar and punctuation or I'll
spank you with a copy of Strunk & White's "Elements of style".

The novice writer tends to make simple and common errors in styles that
comes from lack of knowledge about writing. You wouldn't pick up a tool or
hobby without instructions or learning. Writing, like everything else
requires some foreknowledge. There are some basic do's and dont's to
consider.

Don't have a character describe themselves like a catalog entry. A
character is revealed through strong descriptive writing that brings them
to life to the reader in a subtle manner. Descriptions should come from the
narration (exposition) or from another character.

Example: I'm Cal, 6' blonde hair , blue eyes and at 35 still in good shape
by working out at the gym. (Wow is this guy vain or what? )

Norman was struck by Cal's flashy smile. He could have been the next
Marlboro man with his tall frame, blue eyes and blond hair.

Avoid cliches and excessive dialog. Cliches are to be avoid like the plague
(see). Rewrite the phrase until it's original and memorable. Cliches are
the cockroaches of writing and should be avoided like Paris Hilton
(better). Cliches also present themselves in plot lines, characters and
dialog. Make sure your characters are real people not cardboard cutouts or
rejects from a soap opera. (like Cal)

Show don't tell. This has been repeated ad nauseam by writers and editors
for good reason. Showing is putting the reader in the midst of unfolding
action instead of outlining or explaining the action. It involves all the
senses, it's visceral and convincing.

Telling: Norman was interested in Cal.  Showing: Norman salivated at Cal's
slender butt as he walked ahead.

Dialog is showing in a very fast way but excessive dialog can actually bog
a story down. The reader does not need a transcript of an entire
conversation only information pertinent to the story. Remember to keep
speech real. Read it aloud to hear how it sounds. Exposition is telling.
It's good for background information, a flashback or revealing what's
inside a characters head. There is a time for telling and a time for
showing. Showing is more dramatic and quicker.

Exposition: Peter told Aunt May the truth about how Uncle Ben died that
night.  Dialog: "He said no so the thief shot him. I held his hand as he
died. It's my fault because I could have stopped the thief."

Every story needs a "hook" a way to get and hold the reader's interest.
This is practically a commandment among writers. A long information laden
paragraph explaining the character's background, biography is not the way
to start a story. Start when something significant happens. Begin with
dialog or action that immediately puts the reader into the story.
Background exposition can be introduced in bits and pieces later on to fill
in the reader.  Be careful not to interrupt a scene of dialog with
exposition either. Even well known writers who shall remain nameless (oh
screw it, Anne Rice) do this to annoying effect. The story begins when a
character is compelled to act upon events. The shorter the story the more
strongly the reaction.

Example: Joe gets up in the morning and does his grooming thing. He drives
to work in busy traffic. He gets to the office and makes some calls. His
secretary rushes in breathlessly to tell him the building is on fire.

Joe sat down to begin another dull day's work when Helen rushed in, almost
colliding with his desk.

"Joe, the building's on fire." she said breathlessly.

An annoying, overused device is name branding coupled with exacting detail
of every moment. There's enough advertising in our daily life without
"product placement" as they say in the movie biz, in a story. This comes
from the "Bridges of Madison County" school or writing and should be
avoided. Such details are unnecessary and distracting.

Joe put on a pair of Dockers, a Tommy Hilfiger shirt then went to the
kitchen to get a bottle of Corona beer.

Joe dressed and pulled a beer from the fridge.

Plot is the arrangement of of actions designed to tell a story. There
really are only 3 plots: Man vs. Man, Man vs. Nature, Man vs. Himself and
about 12 variations on them. Is the protagonist fighting his inner demons,
another person- the antagonist, or fighting the elements? Every story been
told it's up to you, gentle writer to tell it in a new and compelling
way. The fancy among contemporary writers is the nonexistent plot. Call me
old fashioned but I find these narration's pointless. Either that or there
are so many characters, plots and subplots I need a flow chart to keep
track of them all.

A good story need not be complicated; but it has to engage the reader. One
of my favorite games is to guess the plot of a story as quickly as possible
then be pleasantly engaged and surprised when it turns out differently then
I expected.

A story needs a conflict either in the form of an antagonist (villain) or
obstacle. Not boy meets girl, boy falls in love and they live happily ever
after. The end.  NO, boy meets girl, boys falls in love with girl, girl is
from rival family. Now we're getting somewhere. A long rambling story about
a relationships in which there is no crucial action or conflict with the
characters is not a story, it's pretentious narration.

Another important element is resolution, not a solution, but a
resolution. Girl is from rival family, boy and girl marry anyway. Girl
fakes death with help of friar. Boy doesn't know it and kills himself, she
wakes, sees dead boy, kills herself, story ends. OK not a laugh fest but
there is a point. (don't trust the friar).

I'll finish with a few personal reminders posted on my bulletin board:

1. Respect the reader. Don't talk down to them. Assume they are intelligent
enough to figure out what's happening. Follow the story as s reader would.

2. Don't sacrifice detail for brevity. But don't overload them with detail
either.

3. Show action and identify the speaker at the same time.

4. Have the character's language reflect their education.


I look forward to reading your story.