Date: Tue, 24 Jun 2008 22:24:34 -0500
From: Jennifer L <lawson10@cox.net>
Subject: Insight Of Heart Part One chapters 1-4

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don't. Before reposting this story to any other site, please ask me. Please
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Lawson10@cox.net

        Insight Of Heart

         By

        Jennifer L

Prologue

Charlotte sat at her dresser applying the finishing touches of her makeup.
She felt along her cheeks with the tiny application brush as she thought
with excitement about her plans for the evening.  She was not used to
spending the evening without those who knew her best.

For as long as she could remember, she had been living the life she
believed was expected of her, with the exception of a few beliefs springing
from a backdrop of higher education.  Tonight, she was trying something
she'd been curious about since she'd graduated college and began her most
recent post graduate job: receptionist at a local crises pregnancy shelter,
a job to get her to her next goal, license professional counselor.  She
planned to attend graduate school as soon as she could save up enough money
to secure a loan.  First, she wanted to buy a house and assure herself some
independence away from her parents or she hoped any man, who she felt she
was becoming less interested in.

Chapter One

Charlotte has always considered herself the typical straight, feminine,
attractive girl.  Though born totally blind, due to damage to the active
nerve in both eyes while her mother was pregnant for her, she never let
that stop her and neither did her parents.  She attained a regular
education with the help of educators for the blind and managed to get along
well with her peers.  She was quite sociable, outgoing and was willing to
educate her friends.

During high school and college, she dated men and had her share of girl
friends though they were always friends and she never had any
experimentation beyond that with any of them nor thought of it.  Throughout
high school and college, she and her friends both blind and sighted were of
the type who were busy trying to either save the world or spread the
message about disability equality, world peace, women's' rights, or some
other message and too busy to form any serious bond.  Though she dated guys
in the past, she never thought long and hard about her sexuality until
lately.  She guessed it hadn't been the time until now.  These days though,
she became less romantically interested in the men she had dated since
college and the men who showed interest in her now were of little interest
to her.

She dated someone for the past nine months and that had not worked out
because of her lack of enthusiasm about the relationship or any further
commitment on her part.  When her boyfriend asked for further commitment
she told him that she wasn't interested in the relationship any more and
hadn't been for some time.  After they broke up, she wondered at her lack
of interest in him and the other men she had dated throughout college.  She
questioned why she had never fallen in love with any of them even though
she cared about them.  She had slept with the last two, felt the pressure
of society and thought there was something wrong with her if she didn't
sleep with them even though she lacked enthusiasm about being with her
partners whether in bed or in these relationships altogether.

Through all this pondering she began wondering if she needed something
different in her relationships.  A week ago she tuned into her favorite TV
show.  It featured two women discovering they were in love with each other.
She began to have fleeting fantasies about women late that night, which she
tried to push out of her mind.  The day after, she remembered instances of
thinking about girls in the past and wondering while being with her
boyfriends what it would be like to be with a woman.  She had tried to
repress these thoughts because she wanted to be a married woman and have
kids like she thought her parents, friends and past boyfriends wanted her
to be.  She could no longer fight these thoughts now that she wasn't dating
at this time.  She began fantasizing more and more about women and
exploring her body thinking about women she fantasized about from either
the books she read for the past week, television movies she heard or women
who came across her path in her daily life.

This idea that she was attracted to women sexually both perturbed and
intrigued Charlotte.  She didn't know what to do about this because she
cared what her friends would think.  She feared the stigma of being labeled
either lesbian, bi-sexual, or bi-curious.  She didn't know how that would
change her life since she had always lived in a comfortable world that was
socially acceptable.  She guessed then, in order to get beyond her fear and
find out if there was a world out there for her that she had not discovered
yet she'd have to get out there and discover if loving women romantically
was a part of her.

For this night, she called off her plans with her closest friends.  Several
of them had called to ask her to either go to the movies, to go eat out or
go to their homes.  However, she wanted to go somewhere new.  She told them
she wanted to stay home and rest.  Tomorrow would be her first day off from
work in a week.  A few days ago, she had overheard a conversation
downstairs in her apartment building between two girls, who she didn't
know, about her favorite bar, Kats, having Lesbian and Bi-curious Ladies
night on Thursday nights.  That happened to be tonight.  Kats was one of
her and her friend's favorite hangouts, but they usually went on weekends.
She wanted to go tonight and figured her friends wouldn't show up because
they were all straight.

She arranged for a cab to pick her up for 8:00 so she could head out to the
club.  She had made an appointment to have her hair-stylist, Marylyn, cut
her brown hair short, shoulder-length and sassy; the way she new would look
cute on her.  She put her hair in a headband.  Then she put on a blue
dress, grabbed her purse and waited for her cab.

Charlotte waited nervously.  She wondered what her lone adventure would
bring.  She wasn't used to such adventures without her friends, but she was
independent and had finally become willing to try this out.  As she heard
the cab horn bellow loudly she walked briskly to the car, tapping her cane
in front of her.  A wiry young man, who she heard get out of what she
figured was the driver's side and walk quickly to the pa'sengers' side,
came around to open her door.  She could smell his strong clone and
cigarette smell.

"Hello miss need help with that door" she heard him say in a jovial voice,
As he opened it.

He saw her walking to the door confidently so he didn't offer to guide her
to the cab but he thought she might struggle with finding either the door
or door handle.  Being polite Charlotte thought, I can get that thank you
but recounted as she heard him slowly pull the door open in front of her.

She felt for the door and quickly felt her way in as she said, "Thank you".

He swung around back to the driver's seat and asked, "So where is a lovely
girl like you going alone tonight?"

"Kats" Charlotte said nonchalantly.  She didn't want to reveal too much.

"Oh isn't it lady's night" he piped up making conversation?

"Yeah, so I heard" she answered coolly.

"I have a friend who goes there often on Thursday nights, Angela.
Actually, she should be working tonight", he offered getting her to open up
more.

"yeah", she said, doing her best to sound disinterested and looking down in
her lap.

"yeah, she's gay."

"ok", Charlotte answered nervously, twisting her fingers in her lap.

"are you he asked curiously?"  His questions were making her very nervous
as she was shy and didn't know herself and didn't know what people would
think of her or how they would treat her if they knew she was searching and
may take advantage of her.

"I don't know, I don't think so, I just wanted to hang out with some women"
she put in.

"I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, I figured you were since everyone
knows Thursday night at Kats is for Lesbian and bi-sexual women. I'm gay
myself and so is my friend I'm telling you about."

At this point, Charlotte was thinking the guy was probably just being
friendly as most cab drivers but she still wasn't sure.  He was more
friendly than some of the other male cab drivers in this city.

"I think I'm just questioning some things now, she offered more openly.

"That's ok always time for that.  I'm James by the way.  If you see Angela
tell her I said, hi."

"Ok, I'm Charlotte."

"Good to meet you Charlotte.  By the way your faire will be 3 dollars."

"What's this, half off for lesbians tonight" she chuckled!

"I thought you had a chink in that armor", he teased good humouredly!  "No,
your not that far from Kats."

"Oh never taken a cab here" she commented.

"Always a first time!"

"Think I could get a ride back with you tonight?"

"Yeah, sure, just ask for cab 23.  I work till 3 am.  Ok we're pulling up."

"Could you pull me up to the door?"

"The closest I can get you is to the curb in front of the door.  Just get
out the car and step out and you will have to pass between two cars and
you'll be right there."

"Ok."

"Will you be ok from there?"

"Yeah, I've been here with my friends a number of times."

"That's good.  Any of your friends know you're coming here?"

"No, they don't know about my figuring out things."

"Well, maybe you'll meet a new friend tonight."

"Thanks" she said, smiling "I hope that's a good omen".

She was glad they were on more comfortable terms and that he was a gay guy
who could understand her plight.  As she handed him the faire she slid out
of the car.  She walked cautiously between the two cars.  She heard a car
pull up not too far away and two doors slam.  As she was approaching the
door and about to put her hand on the handle she heard a couple of pairs of
heels come up behind her and two female voices talking.

"Let me get that for you sweety" she heard one of the females say in a
sweet, high fiminin voice.  Charlotte assumed she must be either a pretty
lesbian, a bi-sexual or someone who was here for her first night like
herself and wondered about her.

"Sandra she has it. Her hand is on the handle.", she heard the other female
say gently but firmly.

The other girl had a deeper voice than Sandra but still fiminin.  Could be
Sandra's friend or lover, Charlotte thought.

"I just thought she might need help" Charlotte heard the girl named Sandra
say as she opened the door for herself and went in the bar.

She could smell the fimiliar smells of smoke and alcohol hitting her right
away as soon as she walked in.  She could hear a group off to the right
playing pool as the loud country music tried to drown them out.  The crowd
didn't sound thick yet but she hoped it would get that way.  She walked off
to her left where she usually paid to get in.  As she was walking she heard
the ladies who had come in behind her chatting and walking in toward the
bar.  She wondered if she had to pay.  Soon a hand tapped her on the
shoulder as she walked up to the counter where she usually paid.

"Hi can I help you?", she heard a female voice that was deep and raspy.

"Hi I'm Charlotte this is my first time here on lady's night.  Do I have to
pay to get in?"

"No mam there is no cover charge", answered a lady, who Charlotte could
tell was black by her voice and was smoking a cigarette by the smell
drifting into her nostrils of which she was accustomed.

"I'm Angela, Charlotte.  I work the door tonight.  Are you meeting someone
here?"

"No I don't know anyone here. This is my first time here for lady's night.
Do you?"  She felt a nervousness settle in that made her chattery.

"Well I know the bar tender and a few others.  I also know that cute guy
that brought you here", she spoke the last sentence with a grin.

"Yes, he told me he was a friend of a girl named, Angela."

"That is true you can belief him."

"I'm glad!", Charlotte said with a smile "Gotta be cautious in this world!"

"This is true.  So this is your first time out to Kats on lady's night,
Charlotte?"

"Yes it is", she answered, now wondering where this girl was going.

Angela asked, "So are you interested in dating a woman?"

"Yes", Charlotte answered more nervously twisting her hands together and
playing with her fingers as she did when she was nervous.

"May I take your hand miss Charlotte?"

"I guess", Charlotte responded with a surprised look on her face.

"There is nothing to be nervous about she said taking her small hands into
her big ones.  She had big hands that were dry, firm and confident.  "I've
seen you here on other nights with your friends, so Figured you was a
straight girl.  When I saw you here I was surprised."

"You have seen me here", Charlotte asked surprised, wondering what a
lesbian was doing hanging out with straight people on other nights!

"I have straight friends who I go out with after work and I see you with
your friends.  So are you bisexual?"

"I don't know.  I just need to explore this side of my sexuality and decide
if I want to date women.  I think I want to date a woman.  I've just never
done it yet.  I've dated men and I've never found anyone I've been in love
with.  I'm spilling my guts to you and I can't believe it."

"That's ok honey.  I'm in love with someone at this bar."

"Yeah?"

"Well, I gotta problem."

"Really, what is it?", asked Charlotte concerned.

"Its nothing tragic honey, don't get too worried!" she laughed gently,
lighting up another cigarette.  "The thing is I've loved her from a
distance for a while but I'm afraid she won't have me cause of my skin
color and some other things."

"Oh you're a beautiful woman I'm sure anyone can look past all that."

"Well, as you could see, this girl and I are not close friends.  I am good
friends with her roommate's x girlfriend.  I hang out with her over here
and see her at my friend Ellen's house every once and a while, but we're
not real close.  In fact, she's one of the girls who walked in behind you."

"What's her name?"

"Sandra, she's beautiful!  She has long yellowish-blond curly hair and
bluish-green eyes; when she looks at you she can see right through you."

"She sounds beautiful.  She was afraid I couldn't open the door for
myself."

"Oh, don't mind that!  She's real sensitive, but that's what I see in her
that I love.  You see I'm what you call a soft butch.  Have you heard of
that? "

"Yeah, in college.", Charlotte laughed.

"Yeah, you smart girl.  Well, I'm masculine, I work in one of the Dell
computer stores putting together laptops and pc's all day from 8 to 5; then
I come here after work and have drinks with friends or shoot pool here on
weekends or come here on Thursday nights to see beautiful ladies."  I work
here too of course."

"Sandra is your beautiful woman right now I guess right?"

"Yup, she is the lady who has my heart."

"Who is the other girl with her?"

Just then Angela dropped her hand, "Hold that thought, Charlotte!  There's
some people at the door!  I'll talk to you later! Better get back to my
job!"

"Ok, I'll get me a drink."

As Charlotte walked through to get to the bar she had to excuse herself as
the crowd was growing and a few people were crowding in around her either
meeting friends or looking for friends.  She finally made her way to the
bar.  She climbed up onto a bar stool and felt a body close to her.  Then,
she heard and felt another woman come over and begin caressing the woman
next to her.  Now Charlotte was starting to let go of her nervousness and
feel her feelings. She could think now that she was away from the straight
world and felt she was among friends.  She felt aroused sexually just
knowing that the girls next to her were embracing.  Then she heard one of
them press her thigh into the other's stomach and heard her put her hand on
the girl's thigh next to her and could feel that the girl who was sitting
on the other girl's lap had her thigh between the other's thighs and was
rubbing her thigh on her crotch.  Charlotte was so aroused she held off on
the drink and ran to the bathroom to masturbate.  She locked herself in a
stall and masturbated alone not caring who heard imagining a girl's breasts
and thighs pressed against her.  She had no face or name to the girl.  She
imagined a woman's soft lips kissing hers, her soft body one with hers,
while her arms encircled her holding her close.  Right then and there she
just knew she wanted to be with a woman and love a woman herself.  What was
it that drew Angela to Sandra?  What was it that drove this woman on the
bar stool to embrace another woman right there in a bar?  What was it that
drove women to each other and what was it she loved in other women?  She
pondered this and being sick of just questioning she wanted to be out there
experiencing it.

Chapter Two

Charlotte was glad no one had heard her in the bathroom getting herself off
as she got herself together.  She walked out into the bar and a woman
stopped her.

A rough hand grabbed her shoulder, "How bout a drink!  Looks like you
haven't got started yet" roared a woman with a deep voice and a serious
tone!

"Watch out; she's a biting butch", called another voice!

"I'm Angela's friend, Ellen.  She told me to take care of you tonight."

"How do you mean, beat me up?", asked Charlotte jokingly.

"No, but keep up that smart mouth and I just might!", she shot back,
smiling.  "What's your poison?"

"Nothing too strong; Bacardi Silver maybe."

"Do they have that here?"

"Sure, haven't you been here?"

"Sure I have, smart ass, just never drank the stuff.  Butch like me drinks
straight Jack Daniels.  I'll buy your drinks.  Angie says your alone.  Why
don't you come sit by us.  We're playing pool and drinking, but we'll sit
you."

"I don't know" Charlotte stammered!  She remembered Angela mentioning her
friend Ellen but wasn't sure if she could trust her.

"Oh come on we're all just a bunch of friendly girls."

"Ok."

"How do I help you?"

"I'll take your arm and hold it above the elbow and you just walk me over
there."

"Oh I get to escort you!", she teased grinning.  "Lady knows how to make a
butch happy."

"Hum", mumbled Charlotte wondering if this girl had a crush on her or not!

Ellen sat her on a stool next to the pool table where she and five of her
friends were playing pool.  Charlotte sat there enjoying her drink
listening to them explain which balls went into the hole while they acted
silly.  She was enjoying the jovial group of women and forgetting her
sexual feelings.  I guess this was why I was meant to come, she figured.
She checked her Braille watch and it was only 11 pm.  It was still a young
night and she didn't have to go into work tomorrow fortunately.  She had
had two glasses of her drink when Ellen asked her if she had ever smoked.

"No!  Never!  I don't really wanta start."

"Oh, come on, we all smoke in the lesbian world!"

"Sure" sneared Charlotte!

"Good a woman who thinks for herself.  I like that!", she said as she lit
one!  "How bout being rebellious for one night and just taking one sig, one
puff?"

Charlotte didn't know if it was the alcohol.  She decided on a puff anyway.
She didn't even know Ellen but she figured it would be ok.  She and her
friend Angie seemed friendly and protective.  They were outgoing women who
didn't want to see her alone.

Charlotte thought, since these two women took it upon themselves to be
there for her she'd at least get to know Ellen.  So she questioned her:

"So Ellen do you have a girlfriend?"

"No, just broke up with one."

"Whose that?"

"A very nice girl; it just didn't work out."

"What was her name?"

"Nosy little femme!  Her name was Yvonne."

"Oh why should I care; I don't know her; I was just wondering."

"Well, for your info she's good friends and roommates with the girl Angie
wants to be with."

"Oh Sandra?"

"Yeah, that's her."

"Do you miss her?"

"Who?  Yvonne?  No I'm starting to like the bartender who works here, I
wanta ask her out."

"How are you going to do that sitting here talking to me?"

"Ok, smarty, I just wanted to sit here and watch my loser friends lose
another game of pool.  But for your info, Yvonne and I are still friends."

"That's good!  I'd like to find a girlfriend!", proclaimed Charlotte
finding her courage, "How can I?"

"Have you dated one?"

"No, never!"

"Well, have you dated a guy?"

"Yeah, plenty!"

"Then, you should have no trouble."

"Now, you're being a smart ass."

"Well, its not much different dating women.  Charlotte, you seem to have a
nice personality and you're cute and you have dealt with your blindness in
a way most of us don't deal with our daily problems.  You will have no
problem finding a girlfriend.  My advice is, take your time and don't
rush."

"Why not!  All of you are way ahead of me", she wined!

"Because we knew we were lesbian in high school or before that!  Just
because your out the closet, excuse the lame phrase (a late bloomer)
doesn't mean you have to catch up in one night.  Besides, I know some girl
is going to find you special.  I can tell you that all ready not even
knowing you very well."

"Thanks Ellen!  I mean it."

"Hey, my friends are starting to leave.  Lets go chat with them real
quick!"

They followed Ellen's friends outside to chit-chat and say good-night.
This time, when Ellen and Charlotte came into the bar to order drinks,
Charlotte just got a coke while Ellen got another light mixed drink.  Ellen
took that opportunity to ask Heather for a dance to which Heather accepted.
Charlotte could tell Ellen was happy after that because she was talking
more jubilantly and teasing her more.

"Look Char!", she said, "Yvonne and Sandy are still here just smoking sigs
and talking alone.  Lets go join them!"

"Sounds good", Charlotte said feeling content to do whatever Ellen and her
friends were going to do next.

She was in a sleepy but content state.  She figured she felt this way
because of the alcohol and that was why she wanted her coke.  This was her
usual drinking routine when her friends went out because alcohol would make
her sleepy, and she hated to sleep on her friends, especially since she
stayed out till 2 in the morning with them most nights.  Tonight it was
even more important to her that she be alert.  Charlotte was now greatful
that she met women who felt the same as she did inside.  She was also
greatful that they were so open to accepting her into their world tonight.
Now alert, anticipation arose at the prospect of finally being formally
introduced to the ladies who had earlier entered the bar behind her, as
Ellen guided her over to the table.

"Hey ladies excuse us hate to break the conversation!", Ellen called out to
her friends.

"Ellen are you drunk again" asked one girl whose voice Charlotte recognized
from the encounter outside and guessed was Yvonne.

"and dragging that poor blind girl around" she heard the other girl say who
she recognized as Sandra the girl who wanted to open the door for
her. Charlotte grimaced a bit, which she hoped Sandra wouldn't see.

"Who you calling poor, she's drank the least and having the most fucking
good time here", Ellen put in laughing her bear laugh.

"I'm going to be you're designated driver", Charlotte teased squeezing her
arm.

Sandra whispered in Yvonne's ear, "I hope Ellen doesn't make her a
girlfriend, but they sure act like a couple!"

"I don't think so Sandy", Yvonne whispered back!

"What was that?" Ellen shouted a bit loudly, "I heard you whispering."
Then she laughed just as loudly.

Sandra took her arm and pulled her into the booth beside her.  Charlotte
could tell Ellen had sat so she asked if she could sit, Yvonne said there
was a seat next to her and took Charlotte's hand, placing it on the back of
the chair.  Charlotte slid in beside her.  Now, Ellen was across from
Charlotte and, Sandra was across from Yvonne.

"I'm Charlotte by the way in case I didn't say so earlier."

"Oh I'm sorry", said Yvonne.  "I'm Yvonne and across from me is Sandra."

"Hi, nice finally meeting you, Charlotte", Sandra spoke up in her gentle
voice.

Yvonne spoke again, "We have to give Ellen a hard time because she gets a
bit rowdy after a while when she drinks.  I'm going to suggest a walk, but
I've noticed you two have been talking most of the night."

"Yeah, Angie put her in charge of taking care of my drinks- I mean, paying
for them.  I don't know why, but that was nice of her."

"Well, are you knew here?"

"Yeah, never been to ladies night before but I come to Kats all the time
with my friends."

"Its Angie's gesture to make a new girl feel welcome", Yvonne noted.

"Well, no offense to Ellen", remarked Sandra, "But I think someone else
should have been with Charlotte."

"Oh I was fine", Charlotte protested.

"You were fine", agreed Yvonne.

"Why are you talking about me like I'm not here", grumbled Ellen into her
folded arms where she was dozing off?  She was a sight with her arms folded
over the table in front of her and her head bobbing up and down as she'd
drifted in and out of sleep.

"Ellen, I think a walk would do you some good", suggested Yvonne.

"Yeah, its nice and cool", soothed Sandra, rubbing her head.

"Oh, San that feels good."

"I'll go with you", Sandra offered "and I wasn't trying to offend you I
just know you get rowdy when you drink."

"I'm not that bad", Ellen protested!  "We had fun!  Didn't we", she asked
looking at Charlotte?

"Charlotte can't see you honey", Yvonne pointed out.  "She was asking you."
She touched Charlotte on the hand as she said this.  Charlotte smiled at
her touch.  It was warm, gentler than Angie or Ellen's.

"We did fine", Charlotte said steadily "I enjoy talking to you but don't
want you to hurt yourself.  "

"Ok", Ellen said submissively.

Sandra took her hand and they went out of the bar telling Angela they'd be
back.

Charlotte felt awkward sitting alone at a table with a girl she hardly
knew.  She didn't know whether or not this girl would want her there.  She
didn't know if Yvonne wanted her to leave or would get up and leave
herself.  She felt afraid that Yvonne would leave and she'd feel rejected.
She liked sitting next to her.  She didn't know what it was.  She liked
joking with Ellen and getting advice from both she and Angie, but neither
of them gave her this sence of being connected as she felt all ready in
only saying a few words to her.  There was something about Yvonne that
Charlotte couldn't put her finger on.  She couldn't get a grip on why she
couldn't figure out what to say to her either.

"So, are you from here Yvonne started?"

"Yes I live in an apartment not far.  I went to college and high school
here and my parents and friends all live here.  I've pretty much had the
same friends all my life and picked up a few more in college."

"Are most of your friends blind?"

"No, I have a lot of blind and sighted casual friends.  A few good friends.
Some are blind.  Some are sighted."

"You seem to know this bar well, do you come here often?"

"Yes, I come here a lot with my friends.  "

"You said tonight was your first night here for lady's night.  What brought
you here tonight?"

"Well I've dated men throughout the years; I've never dated a woman.  I
don't know what its like.  I'm just less interested in men and never been
in love with any of them.  I've found I'm interested in women as I've spent
time alone lately.  After tonight, I know for sure, I'm attracted to
women."

"You do?"

"Yes, all the feelings and just things I've experienced."

She described her experiences with Angela, Ellen and with the girls on the
bar stool.  She recounted what they'd shared about their feelings for other
women and how she felt the same feelings inside.

"Do you love a particular woman Charlotte?"

"No, not yet. All women are attractive right now.  Just certain things that
different women do turn me on, but no particular woman has caught my
attention yet."

"Well, Charlotte feelings are one thing; but, for me, it took a
relationship for me to decide I was a lesbian."

"Really?"

"Yes!  In fact, when I was with Ellen, it was the best gift I'd been given
even if it didn't last.  She was my first lover and she taught me what it
was to love a woman and to be loved by a woman."

"How?"

"I'd love to tell the story in detail but not here at the bar.  Will you
visit me at my apartment sometime?"

"Sure!  I have off from work tomorrow would that be ok?"

"I work for a bank and my shift runs until 2.  I can meet with you after
that.  I can pick you up at your place."

"That sounds good.  "

Charlotte gave her instructions to her apartment and they realized they
lived across town which is probably why she'd never seen Yvonne before.
Yvonne explained she'd moved here in college and majored in accounting
which was a far cry from Charlotte's major so they could have never had
classes together.  Charlotte asked her if she'd known any blind people.
Yvonne admitted she had read for a blind girl in high school.

"Was she straight", Charlotte asked?

"Yes, I believe so.  She was boy crazy and always talking about boys."

"Did you like girls?"

"I wasn't really out.  I wasn't sure how to express what I was either and
who I preferred, but I'll share more about that with you later."

While they were immersed in conversation, Sandra and a more sober Ellen
came back to the table.

"How do you feel, Ellen", asked Charlotte?

"Oh better!  I hope Heather is ready for her dance", she put in.

"That will wake you up", Charlotte laughed.

"She told me she likes Heather not charlotte", Sandra commented.

"Right", Yvonne teased, looking at her knowingly!

"Quit teasing me Sandra wined!"

"You two quit scolded Ellen!

" Do they always do that", Charlotte wondered outloud "tease each other"?

"Yeah", Ellen answered.

"How did you two become roommates", asked Charlotte?

"We were all three at one time", Put in Ellen.

"Yeah", put in Sandra.  "Me and her, I mean, Yvonne, met in college", said
Sandra obviously catching on to how to talk in front of Charlotte.

"Were you ever lovers?"

"20 questions", exclaimed Ellen!

"Give her a break El she's figuring this crazy lifestyle out Yvonne
chuckled, no we've always just been friends, Sandy and I never had that
love bug."

Charlotte laughed.  They talked and bantered more till the last dance.
Then, Heather came over and took Ellen by the hand and led her over to the
dance floor.  Yvonne described to Charlotte how they danced Heather
gracefully and Ellen stepping on her tows, bumping and grinding against
Heather.  Of course, Heather was doing the same looking more gracefully.
It was a sight; Sandra just kept giggling.

"All right closing tine", Angie was bouncing through the tables waving her
arms at the girls.  "Of course, how can I kick out the only people in this
place who happen to be all my friends."

"We're your only friends", asked Sandra sympatheticly?

"Hardly", Angie slipping in the seat beside her!  "You are some of my
favorite people though".

When the song ended the girls came giggling and holding hands walking upon
the table.

"No place for us to sit, drolled Heather in a low sexy tone"

"We need to get out anyway before we get kicked out", warned Angie!

"How bout we hang out for a while at my place", offered Yvonne.

"Honey you got work at eight", Sandra pointed out in a meek voice.

"Yes Mom well I might as well stay up a few hours and sleep tomorrow.  My
house or yours", Yvonne asked pointing to Angie?

"Man, aren't you assertive tonight!  Ok, yours baby!  Mine is a wreck!"

They made arrangements for rides.  Since she was still a little
intoxicated, Ellen rode with Charlotte Yvonne and Sandra.  Angie and
Heather took their own cars.  Charlotte had never been to a lesbian
apartment and wondered if it was decorated any differently.  She walked in
and smelt a sweet smell like candles and flowers.  She knew that women
lived here.

"We keep our house very clean, so its not an obstacle course.", said
Sandra.

"I'll make coffee, since I started this party.", put in Yvonne.

Charlotte found a couch.  Loving to sit on couches, she made herself comfy
on what happened to be a love seat.

"Is it fine to sit here", she asked?

"You don't need to ask, honey", said Sandra!  "Just make yourself at home!
We have two couches."

She was glad Sandra was seeming more comfortable around her.  She sat by
herself wondering where everyone else was.  Suddenly, Angie announced she
was coming sit next to her.

"You know how I said I am in love with Sandra?"

"Yes", she let out slowly!

"Tonight is the night I've been waiting for.  I don't know how Yvonne knew
to invite all of us."

"I don't either!"

"You musta said something!"

"No, I promise!"

"Anyhow!  I have to tell her how I feel, or at least ask her out!"

"I say go for it, Angie before your friend Ellen picks her up."

"Ellen", she asked with incredulity in her voice?

"Yes, they had a walked tonight to where off Ellen's drunk."

Angie took Charlotte's hand again, which charlotte was growing accustomed
to by now; "Charlotte, you naive girl!"

"I am not naïve!  I have dated more boys-"

"Them dicks don't know nothin!  No offense!"

"Your probably right", Charlotte laughed."

"No listen, Charlotte, I like you as a friend and confide in you cause your
sweet.  But, you are still innocent, and this is your first night of the
gay scene.  Listen, aint no way sandy and Ellen ever gunna go together,
cause Sandra feels sorry for her cause of her drinking and treats her like
a baby.  Aint no way any love gunna last out of that.  Even in the straight
world that wouldn't last."

"I get your drift."

"Besides, I think Sandy's too loyal to Yvonne as a best friend to ever take
her cast-offs."

"Oh is that how this works, you don't date your best friends x?"

"Well in some cases, no, depends on your morals."

"I like you girls!  You have some morals!"

"Well, tonight is my night!  Do or die!"

"You're gunna do!  Don't worry!"

"Also, I think Ellen is definitely interested in Heather if you didn't
notice the way they were dancing together.  Well, did anyone describe it to
you?"

"Yeah, Yvonne did", Charlotte answered, smiling, remembering that there was
no other way she could notice Ellen and Heather dancing together except to
have it described to her.

"When Ellen wants to be with someone, she means business!"

"I see", Charlotte responded.

A minute later, Sandra came in with two cups of coffee, "Sorry you two
didn't realize", she stopped, Seeing Angie holding Charlotte's hand.

Angie let go of her hand to grab a cup of coffee, "Where'd Ellen and
Heather go", she asked?

"I saw them go on my balcony."

"Isn't it cold", asked Charlotte innocently?

"They wanted to smoke and talk", said Sandra matter-of-factly.

"I thought Charlotte was naïve!", said Angie sarcasticly.  "Come on, Sandy,
they're probably sucking face out there! "

"I don't know!  I don't get into their business.", she said innocently.
"Actually, I thought you two were about to- well- you know-", she
stammered.

"We're just talking", Angie explained.

Sandra looked skeptical.

Charlotte could since Sandy didn't believe Angie so to clear the tension
she said, "Actually Angie was telling me about another girl she likes and
she was holding my hand to teach me because she is kind of like my mentor."

"Oh, maybe I am naïve", admitted Sandra, laughing at her mistaken
assumption.

"I think you might wanta give Charlotte her coffee, Sandra", reminded
Angie.

"Oh, yeah!", Sandra look down at the cup she was still holding in mid air,
took Charlotte's hand and placed it around the handle.  "I hope you like
it.  Its flavored with Irish cream.  Yvonne bought it!"

Charlotte sipped it.  "Its great she said!  I love coffee, especially late
at night.  Reminds me of college."

"Me too", Sandra agreed.

While they were sipping their coffee in silence Yvonne came in from the
Kitchen, "Hey girls I have some fruit cut up here in case you want it.  If
any of you wanta sleep here or go home just let me know."

"Sure", Angie and Charlotte said at once.

They drank and ate in silence for a few minutes till Charlotte mentioned
that this party was quiet.

"I wonder if heather and Ellen left", Yvonne stated everyone's thoughts
aloud.  As she was looking toward the balcony, the culprits came in.  They
were breathless and holding hands.

"What are you two up to, or need I ask? Yvonne gave Ellen a knowing smile.

"Can we use your room giggled Ellen?"  She stood there holding Heather's
hand with an excited but guilty grin on her face waiting for her sentence.

"Bad girl, teased Yvonne.  "Just make sure you clean my sheets in the
morning."

"I will she said giggling and leading her new lover right behind her."

Just then, hands shaking, Angie took her cue; "Sandy, is there some place
we could talk?"

"Sure, Angie", Sandra answered looking concerned!

Her eyelids were fluttering, but she was staying up so she wouldn't feel
like she was being rude to her guests.

"Would you like to go in the kitchen", asked Sandra?

"That's fine", mumbled Angie looking down in her cup.

She was afraid if Sandra told her that she couldn't date her she would not
be able to date again.  She'd rather go into seclusion than to be rejected
by this sweet, gentle lady.  Sandra looked concerned.  Angie looked more
nervous than anything, as they walked into the kitchen.  Charlotte thought,
I wanta listen in on that conversation.  Yvonne had a similar thought but
also had other plans.

"Mind if I sit next to you", asked Yvonne bravely?

"Not a bit", piped up Charlotte.

Yvonne plopped on the love seat next to her.  For a split second, Charlotte
was feeling her old awkwardness again.  The same awkwardness she'd felt
sitting with Yvonne at the bar.  But, this time she was alone in her living
room with her.  Suddenly, along with her awkwardness, a new energy serged
forth.  Yvonne seemed to be reaching out to her.  Charlotte knew that this
kind of reaching out took a lot of courage for most people. It took courage
for Yvonne just to invite a woman, who was inexperienced in herway of life
into her home.  Then, she seemed to know what Charlotte needed and how to
help her with what she couldn't physically see.  Yvonne proved to be brave.
She was going to return the favor.

"So, what was your plan?"

"Me, have a plan, no not me", Yvonne said innocently!

"You had a plan!  I know when my friends are up to something; and you
lesbians aren't any different!  You are people too", teased Charlotte.

"You are a little flirt!  I must admit, I like your personality", Yvonne
laughed.  "You aren't Angie's only confidant!  I know she has feelings for
my roommate and is painfully shy to express them; and I know my x has a
crush on the bar-tender so I couldn't help but get their shy butts in gear
and get them over here; and I was going to do it tonight."

"You are something!  And, where do I come in?"

"I wanted to get to know you better."

Charlotte wasn't sure how she felt about this.  This girl was an out and
out lesbian and attracted to women.  On the other hand, she didn't know how
to connect with a woman in a romantic or sexual way yet.  There seemed to
be some mystery surrounding this to which she didn't have a clue how to
solve alone.

"What do you mean by get to know me better?"

"I mean, I want you to become a friend and maybe more.  I think you're
beautiful Charlotte and I wouldn't mind getting to know you."

"But, you're experienced and I'm not and its 3 in the fricken morning and I
don't have a clue how to love a woman even though I want to."

"Its ok, Charlotte!  You don't have to know how to express what you want
right now.  Can I take your hand?"

"I could start there.  I feel a real peace with you; I'm attracted to you,
but how do I let you know?"

"Are you trying to figure it all out now?"

"I guess I'm thinking too hard about it.  I was thinking tonight maybe some
kind of experience would help."

"Maybe.  Slowly, overtime, some experience could be the key.  I would like
to teach you and help you find that connection with a woman.  Are you
willing to let me?  Do you want me to help you?"

"Yes! I want you to help me!  Yvonne, You're an easy going girl with a
great personality and I enjoy talking to you all ready."

"Do you know what I look like", she asked?

"No", Charlotte answered "I was not thinking of that.  I was just thinking
of your personality and getting to know that."

"Ok, well first, I'll let you feel my hair and my face; and I'll describe
myself to you.  Would that be ok?"

"Yes, sure!  I should have asked.

Its ok!  I'd like you to know what I look like.  I am 5 ft 5, I weigh I
guess 130 and have a relatively fit build.  I have dark blond hair and it
is pretty long and blue eyes and a pretty average looking face and you can
just feel it if you'd like.  I do where make up by the way."

"You're pretty!"

"Thank you."

Charlotte felt her long blond hair flowing mid-length over her shoulders
and down her back and her arms, which were shapely, thin and long.  She had
long slender hands and a firm but gentle grip when she took Charlotte's
hand.  Charlotte liked how soft her skin felt to the touch even though she
was fit.  She felt: her small, round face around her eyes, her perfect
nose, her chin, her cheeks and her moist lips.

"Are your lips pink", Charlotte asked?

"Yup, but I like to put a light pink lip-gloss on them to bring out the
color, because they get pale."

"You are pretty", Charlotte stated!

Yvonne took her in her arms and held her close; "Charlotte you are
beautiful she proclaimed with awe as though holding a flower she had never
picked before!  She pressed Charlotte's cheek next to hers.  "Charlotte, I
don't want to do anything that will hurt you.  Do you believe that I don't
want to do anything that you don't want to do?"

"Sure I do."  She was concerned, wondering what was going on.

"Do you mind if I kiss your lips, Charlotte?  I know you've never kissed a
woman."

She was so surprised this woman with experience with women would want to
kiss her; "You wanta kiss me!"

"Sure I do!"

Charlotte moved her mouth along her cheek till her lips met Yvonne's lips.
Yvonne kissed her lightly on the lips.  Then, joined her tongue to
Charlotte's.  Their tongues danced lightly together.  They tasted each
other's lips as they made out for the first time on the love seat that
morning.  Charlotte felt energy with Yvonne as she had never felt with any
man.  Yvonne was warm, gentle and wanted to give as well as receive without
being demanding.

"You are so good at kissing, Charlotte!  You taste sweet!"

"All I know to say is, wow.  Your kiss is gentle and warm, receptive and
giving.  Its certainly not one I've experienced before.  I enjoy being here
with you.  I think you're a beautiful woman also.  I'd like to get to know
you better after tonight."

"We'll have time for that, honey.  Unfortunately, I have to work and its 4
o'clock.  I am going to have to sleep on the couch.  I have to get some
sleep or I'm useless."

"Well, I know all about that.  I have a hectic people person job myself and
I need sleep in order to be of use too.  Do you want me to call a taxi?"

"Nonsense!  I won't hear of it!  I'm bringing you home!  Hold up while I
get my purse!"

Yvonne got up and rubbed her on the shoulder, which sent a shiver up
Charlotte's spine.  She didn't know if it was the lack of sleep but this
woman had her charged up sexually.  It musta been the kiss. I sure didn't
have that much to drink she thought.  A second later Yvonne was back.

"You know, Sandy and Angie never came out of the kitchen.  Let's go out my
back door!"

"You have one?"

"Yeah!"

"Nice place!"

"Yeah, You bet!  Well, I want to give them some privacy."

On the ride home they talked about the night and how they liked it and the
kiss they'd shared.  They both said they'd love to share a kiss like that
again.  As Yvonne led Charlotte to her door she unlocked it and stepped in.

"Oh before you go, Yvonne, drive safe!"

"Ok!  I want to kiss you before I leave."

Charlotte turned her face.  Yvonne took Charlotte's face in her hands and
kissed her fervently on the mouth allowing Charlotte to kiss her back and
explore her mouth with her tongue.  Then, They broke away from the kiss.

"Night" Charlotte said shyly!

"Night, sweety!  Until tomorrow!"

Yvonne gave her shoulder another squeeze sending another shiver through
her.  Charlotte waited in her doorway and listened.  She could hear her
footsteps as she paced through her hallway and down the apartment building
stairway.

Charlotte closed her apartment door on the hushed hallway.  She reflected
on the night's events, as she moved throughout the apartment getting
settled for bed.  Tonight had promised her everything she had been looking
for.  She had met women like herself and a lady she didn't expect to meet.
Now, she was willing to accept what this journey was about to unfold for
her.  This meant for her being open to disclosing to her friends and family
that she was open to loving women romanticly.  This also meant that she had
to change the way she thought about herself and others.  She could
no-longer make decitions based on what her lovers, friends and parents
wanted, but on what was best for her and the greater good of the universe.
Charlotte was never a religious type, but was very intuned to the
spiritual.  It was important to her that she was in harmony with all around
her.  She wanted to achieve the right balance in life in order to achieve
harmony whether that was in personal relationships, physical health,
emotional growth or her livelihood.  This was what helped her to realize
that something wasn't right in her past relationships.  She lacked harmony.
Tonight she had found something in this group of girls.  Along with that,
there was definitely something special about her connection with Yvonne.

Chapter Three

It was 1:30 the next afternoon when charlotte heard her alarm go off. She
wanted the voice that was telling her what time it was to shut up.  She was
tired of being told what time it was over and over like she was slow to get
it or something.  She lazily rubbed her eyes, reached over to push the
button, "shut up clock!", she grumbled sleepily.  She new she needed to
hurry because Yvonne would be here to get her in an hour.  She was also
hungry and could feel her stomach rumbling like a volcano threatening to
erupt.

She took a shower and put on a fresh light outfit, for it was warm today.
She wore a cotton spaghetti strap dress that went half way down her thigh
and showed just part of her belly.  She liked to wear it when she was
meeting a guy of interest.  Now, she was embarking on a new adventure.  She
wet her short brown hair with a comb and slicked it back and put on some
ear rings and just a little gloss.  Today, she was going for the natural
beauty look.  She was ready at two as she checked her Braille watch.  A
minute later she heard a knock on her door.  She raced excitedly to get it
but stopped before to check her nerves.  Should I look so nervous, she
thought.  She took a deep breath and opened it.

"I thought you'd never come", she heard Yvonne say, as she opened it.

Charlotte smiled, "I just wanted to be sure I was ready to see you".

"Not having second thoughts, are we?"

"No last night was great for me!  It feels like a dream!  I don't know if
this is happening to me!"

"You can believe it is!", Yvonne said as she gave her a hug.  "I don't want
to make you uncomfortable, Charlotte, so I'll move as slow as you need,
ok."

"Thank you, I want that!"

"You look beautiful today!  I have to tell you. You don't mind that do
you?"

"No, not at all! I hoped you would think so!  Would you tell me what you
are wearing?"

"Sure, I have on blue cotton pants and a white shirt with blue flowers on
it.  My hair is down and my shirt is cut like yours and I have spaghetti
straps like you, so we had the same idea."

"That's great", Charlotte smiled!

"So, can we call this a date" Yvonne asked?  Would you be comfortable with
that?"

"Sure", Charlotte said giggling!

"Great!  Have you eaten?"

"Not at all!  Slept through breakfast!  What about you?"

"Well, I didn't skip.  Unfortunately, I had to eat breakfast and go to
work.  But, we can have coffee and something for you to eat at a quiet
place I know on the edge of town if you'd like."

"Sure!"

"Are you afraid of running into any friends?"

"No, they'll find out soon enough, and if they don't like me, too bad!"

"That's my girl!"

They left talking and holding hands, Charlotte feeling like she was on her
first date or finding her first best friend.  They continued to hold hands
and talk in Yvonne's car on the way to the coffee shop.  Charlotte grew up
in this town but had only been to this quaint little shop a few times in
her life.  It was one of the older ones in town and had basically been here
from the beginning.  They talked in the car about casual things and who
they new in town and who Yvonne saw on the road and if Charlotte knew them.
It turned out they had a few college acquaintances in common.  All the
while Charlotte felt comfortable holding her new Girlfriend's hand and very
at peace in her company.  When they got to the coffee shop it was a very
interesting experience for charlotte.  Yvonne held her hand to walk her in
and order coffee.  Yvonne paid for her coffee and insisted on doing that
since it was a date.  the short middle-aged lady behind the counter
noticing they were holding hands stammered out, "What would your f-f-friend
like", and Charlotte had to speak up for herself.  She was used to doing
that.  She was trying to decide whether the lady was uncomfortable because
she was blind or because she was holding another woman's hand, which she
assumed the latter.  She told Yvonne about this when they were walking to
their table.  They giggled about it.  Yvonne said this happened to her all
the time when she and Ellen held hands, and they always did in public.
Yvonne said that one thing Ellen taught her was never be ashamed and she
learned not to be.  She recounted that of course if she had been in a
smaller town like where she grew up she would be more cautious.

"You are very lucky, Charlotte to grow up in a city, even though there are
people with their hang-ups."

"I still don't like to make people uncomfortable", Charlotte said.

"We don't either, but we shouldn't have to walk on egg-shells either to
keep everyone else comfortable so we all walk a fine line and you know I
really wanta hold your hand."

"Thanks", said Charlotte blushing a little, as Yvonne took her hand again.

They sipped their drinks in silence for a few minutes enjoying each other's
company while Charlotte got to fill her stomach.

"So, are you gunna tell me your story" prompted Charlotte?

"All right, where shall I begin", answered Yvonne?  "Well", she began
without waiting for an answer, "Let me begin by telling you that when I got
together with Ellen for the first time I wasn't sure how to express what I
wanted either. She was out about her sexuality and had been out and
comfortable all through high school and was full blown Lesbian in
college. When we got together I was shy and wanted to learn and was
attracted to women but didn't know how to express my romantic feelings and
was afraid.  I'd dated a couple of guys in high school although it had
never gone beyond going to the movies a couple of times and I didn't even
enjoy kissing them.  I always fantasized about other girls and figured I
may either be a lesbian or it may be a teen aged phase.  I needed to be
sure though.  When I was in college I knew it wasn't a high school or teen
aged phase when my fantasies about other women and girls were still there.
I met Sandra early in college and she was like-minded. We became close
friends soon in our first semester even though we never dated.  I wanted to
be out.  During my first semester in college Sandra and I decided we wanted
to share a dorm room so we asked to get assigned together.  We began having
fun going out to the lesbian clubs together.  That was my first time going
out and having fun so Sandy and I partied a bit, but we settled down during
the second semester because we got an apartment with Ellen.  I also started
realizing how important my studies were.  Anyway, during my first semester
I met Ellen and our relationship began.  Sandra also met someone and was in
a three-year, abusive relationship that it broke my heart to watch her
suffer through.  Ellen had dated girls in high school.  She knew I hadn't
dated a girl yet.  She was very patient and taught me to find a connection
with her.  Our first two dates she took me to concerts and a couple of
movies by ourselves just so we could be comfortable together, but the first
time we went to Kats together she taught me how to slow dance with her.
Heather and her girl were out with us that night.  Heather has always been
a casual friend of ours we'd go dance with and see in school until Ellen
wanted to begin dating her within the past month or so.  She's always held
bar-tending jobs at lesbian clubs and on lady's night at kats and has been
a lesbian since high school too as far as I know.  Anyway, Ellen taught me
how to explore my feelings through dancing.  I felt like I could open upto
her that way and she to me.  After that night, I was able to express my
feelings for her through kissing mutually with her and giving her oral sex
and she taught me to let her come inside me with a dildo and stuff like
that."

Charlotte told her about the one time she heard two women having sex on TV
over a week ago.  That was her only exposure to what women did together
other than listening to girls talking about lesbians in college.  Most of
what they said in college had been false information at the time and
Charlotte had known better than to believe them anyway.

The only exposure Charlotte had to sex was with men.  Most of the time, she
noticed she projected fiminen qualities onto them without realizing it.
She asked Yvonne what some of the myths and facts were that she'd always
heard about lesbian relationships.  She also asked her every question from:
are their different ways women have sex and what is a dildo to how do you
know if you've found the right partner?  Yvonne spent time educating her
about lesbian sex.

"Well, bottom line is, you will have to experience it when you're ready."

They talked holding hands for a couple of hours learning that a
relationship between two women takes as much give and take and work as a
relationship between a man and a woman.  Charlotte found she could only
agree with this.

"So, Yvonne, why didn't it work out with you and Ellen?"

"We didn't have the same goals, and she and I agreed it wouldn't work.  We
are still friends, though.  She wants different things in life.  She wants
to party more than I do and I am more ready to settle down.  I think we're
at different places in our lives and looking for different things in a
romantic relationship.  I'm looking for deeper commitment and she's still
needing to explore different types of relationships and have a good time.
She is still a great person and I care about her a lot.  To be honest, I do
worry about her drinking."

"I noticed that last night, that she was drinking heavily myself" put in
charlotte in a somber tone.

"Well, I just express my concern and be a friend, but she was like that
before we broke up."  She sighed, "I just hope she and Heather work out."

Me too!  "Are you moving on", asked Charlotte?

"Yes!"

Thank you for sharing with me today!  "I've learned a lot!"

"Charlotte, if I can suggest anything to you right now that you're
beginning, don't feel you need to jump into anything or make any decision
just yet.  You're here for an adventure, so go at your pace."

"Could we spend time together like this again?  I am beginning to like you
more the more I talk with you!"

"Me too, Charlotte!"

"Thank you!"

"What are you doing this weekend?"

"My friends want to see me tonight, and I may tell them what is going on-
that I'm exploring my sexuality."

"Are you nervous", Yvonne gave her hand a squeeze.

"Yes, a bit", as her hand shook and Charlotte's eyes looked down, though
she couldn't see!

"I feel nervous for you and have gone through this before with my family."

"What do I say to them?"

"I would just say I'm exploring another side of my sexuality and I'm
interested in dating women, like that and be as honest as you are, Char, I
don't know."

"How did your family handle your dating Ellen and coming out?"

"I grew up an only child.  They were surprised at first.  I told them the
night before I brought Ellen home for dinner because I wanted to invite her
for dinner.  They were surprised because they knew I dated a couple of boys
in high school, but the shock wore off 45 minutes after I told them because
they thought about my history and that I'm in college and seeing the world.
My parents were graduate students in the sixties so they saw everything
including women falling in love with women.  They knew I hadn't fallen in
love with boys and hadn't gotten serious with any one in high school like
my other girl friends.  They also saw that I was having a lot of fun with
Sandra, who I was always hanging out with and now I was disclosing that I
was dating a girl named Ellen.  They knew that going to college just made
you more worldly and open to new experiences, so their surprise wore off
quickly."

"My parents were hippies who have always remained open-minded but have
grown a bit more conservative as they've gotten older.  They've always
encouraged me to overcome my limitations", added Charlotte.

"It may not be as hard to come out to your parents then, and hopefully
you'll have the same courage to come out to your friends."

"Yeah, I just need to breathe deep and relax before I go."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Well, I'll go alone, if that's ok, but I may come see you after."

"Where are you meting them?"

"At my friend, Theresa's apartment."

"You guys close?"

"Yeah, we're pretty close, but I don't know if she will accept or
understand that I have feelings for girls.  She's not very tolerant of
lesbians."

"Awe!  Well, I want to support you.  If you need anything just let me
know."

"I'll call you after we hang out tonight."

"That will be great!  The girls and I may be hanging out at my apartment."

"By the way, how late did Sandra and Angie stay up?"

"Oh, they were up past the time I went to bed.  When I got back from
dropping you off at your apartment, they were still talking in the kitchen.
When I got up this morning to go to work, Sandra's car was gone and so was
Angie's.  I'm a bit concerned to be honest."

"So am I", put in Charlotte!  "Then again", Charlotte recounted "It could
be things could be ok and they both took a romantic get away.

They laughed, paid for their coffee and left the coffee shop.

Chapter four

Later that evening Charlotte went to Theresa's house for dinner with her
friends she'd known since college.  Theresa was the most straight friend
Charlotte had and dating a guy named Bill.  She was boy crazy for as long
as Charlotte could remember.  She was blind and religious and also took an
intolerant attitude toward people different from her including gays and
lesbians.  The rest of her friends at the party that night were all blind
and part of the organization of blind people promoting equal rights for the
blind in her community but most were more tolerant than Theresa who she had
trusted the most all through college.  When she got to Theresa's apartment
she and Bill were there talking to mostly couples and being lovy dovy and
cooing over their engagement ring which Charlotte had no interest in.  In
the mean time all the singles were engrossed in the latest organization
gossip which she now was not interested in.  When they noticed that the
usually talkative Charlotte was quiet during the meal, Stacey teased her
about talking too much and Charlotte mumbled that there were other places
she'd rather be.  She was starting to miss the company of her new friends
and Yvonne.  They had begun to grow on her and Charlotte didn't realize it
until Yvonne dropped her off at her apartment.  She couldn't get her touch
and kiss out of her mind nor could she stop aching to feel Yvonne's hands
on her again.  Then Theresa comes over and puts an arm around her and pipes
really loudly