Date: Sat, 28 Oct 2000 23:21:57 -0400 (EDT)
From: Secret Dreamer <dreamsecret@poetic.com>
Subject: Fall Down and Smile - 4
Dah! Dah! Dah! Muhahaha. I know, It was completely evil of me but I
couldn't help it! Hehe. I love you :). I hope you like this chapter.
Um.... So yeah! :0) I'm watching 'I know what you did last summer' On
TNT. *swoon* Ryan Phillippe has THE nicest butt...
Chapter 4
"I've loved you forever. In lifetimes before. And I promise you never will
you hurt anymore..."
By: Secret Dreamer <dreamsecret@poetic.com>
I guided Dawn's convulsing body to the couch and set her down.
"What happened, sugar?" I pressed once more. She kept shaking
against me.
"Jared..."
"Jared?" It seemed impossible to get a straight answer out of her.
As worried as I was, I couldn't get what she wasn't willing to let out. I
led her back to her bedroom.
"No," she shook her head violently.
"Do you want to sleep in my bed?" I asked. She nodded. I led her
to my bed and slid off her torn dress. She whimpered at my touch.
"Shh. It's okay." She stopped upon hearing my voice. I got her out of her
clothes and slipped a pair of pajama pants and tee shirt over her body.
"Will you stay with me?" she squeaked as I helped her into bed.
With a disapproving groan, I nodded and slid in next to her. She latched
her body around mine. If I hadn't known better, I would've thought she
snapped one or two of my ribs with her death grip. "Sing to me," she
pleaded.
"What do you want me to sing?"
"Blessed." I felt my heart ache for her. The poor girl was
hurting and wouldn't tell me why. It killed me not to be able to soothe
her pains. I could only do what she asked. I took a deep breath and did
as she wished.
I think, how life used to be; Always walking in the shadows.
Then I look, at what you've given me; I feel like dancing on my
tip-toes
Why was she so fragile? What had Jared done to her?
I must say everyday I pray
When realize you're by my side;
I know I'm truly...
Blessed for everything you've given me;
Blessed for all the tenderness you show;
Do my best with every breath that's in me;
Blessed to make sure you never go.
Even if she didn't tell me. I would find out. One way or another.
There are times, that I test your faith, 'til you think you might
surrender.
Baby I'm, I'm not ashamed to say, that my hopes will grow in
splendor
You walked by in the nick of time
looking like an answered prayer
You know I'm truly...
Blessed for everything you've given me;
Blessed for all the tenderness you show;
Do my best with every breath that's in me;
Blessed to make sure you never go.
Never go. I'd never let her go. I'd be there for her while she fought
whatever was hurting her.
Blessed with love and understanding;
Blessed when I hear you call my name;
Do my best with faith that's never-ending;
Blessed to make sure you feel the same.
Deep inside you fill me with your tender touch...
She shuddered in my arms. I held her tighter and nuzzled her neck softly.
Just so she knew I was there.
Blessed for everything you've given me;
Blessed for all the tenderness you show;
Do my best with every breath that's in me;
Blessed to make sure you never go.
He would pay. I knew he'd done something. It was just a matter of time
before I found out what, and disposed of him in the proper fashion.
I looked down at her, noticing that her hold had lessened. She was
sleeping. I slid out of her grasp and undressed quickly. I climbed back
in as she whimpered. Pulling her back to me, she once again pulled me so
close to her body I thought one of my ribs would crack.
"It's okay, Dawn," I whispered. "Everything is going to be okay."
*******
I woke up with a horrible headache. Damn alcohol. I had a low
tolerance and found that my hangovers were worse than most experienced. I
turned and found the other side of the bed empty. Panicked, I jumped out
of bed and ran to the kitchen. I breathed a sigh of relief as I saw her
making breakfast.
"Hi," she grinned cheerfully. That was odd. Last night she was
about to break, now she was prancing around the kitchen like last night had
been the best night of her life.
"Morning. Are you feeling okay?" I inquired, raising an eyebrow.
"Course," she smiled. "Why wouldn't I?" Okay, something was truly
wrong. I walked to the living room.
"Come sit with me." She turned off the stove and wiped off her
hands. Dawn sat down next to me on the sofa. "Honey, what happened last
night?"
"Nothing," she growled.
"Dawn," I warned. Suddenly, she looked very tired. She bright eyes
were now dull as dirt as she slumped against the back of the couch.
"I tried to stop him. He was just so much stronger than me," she
whispered. I heard the anger rising in her voice.
"Stop him from what, sweetheart?"
"He just kept pushing and pushing. A-and I tried to scream for
help but he hit me." I felt my own anger starting to seethe through my
veins. So that's where that bruise came from. She looked up at me with
tear-filled eyes. "Hold me." She half pleaded, half demanded. I closed
the distance between us. Before I had even touched her, she fell into my
arms.
"It's gonna be okay, sweetie. One thing at a time." She sobbed
into my shoulder as I stroked her hair.
"It hurt so much. The most painful thing I've ever experienced.
He ripped through me like I was paper."
Deep down I didn't want to believe. I didn't want to believe he'd
done something so vicious to her. "The bastard," I growled. "The fucking
bastard. I'll kill him."
"No," Dawn stiffened. "You can't tell anyone. I can't allow this
to get to me."
"Get to you!" I roared, unable to hold my temper any longer. "He
fucking raped you! He can go to jail for that and he will. If it's the
last thing I do, that fucking bastard will go to jail and rot there until
Satan claims his tattered remains." Dawn flinched at my words. I didn't
care. He was going to pay. I didn't care how, but he would pay.
"Please," she whispered. I sighed and held her body again. She
had stopped crying but she kept shaking.
"And you have to work with him until the end of the play?" Dawn
shuddered and nodded. "I'm going to start coming to rehearsals with you," I
said flatly. She sat up.
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes," I growled. She was too weak to resist my persistence.
Finally, she leaned against the back of the couch and sighed.
"Fine."
*******
Dawn was quiet the rest of the weekend. She refused to talk to me.
She went so far as to avoid me. Even tried to leave without me Monday
morning. Unfortunately for her, I'd been up since 8 o'clock waiting for
her. She snarled at me before grabbing her bag and leaving, with me not
far behind.
The theatre where they were rehearsing was modest. A nice old
building that had may secrets and stories to tell. I pulled out my camera
and took pictures of it's exterior before following Dawn inside.
"Miss Reed," the director groaned. "We don't allow visitors." I
didn't like the way this man was treating her. I didn't like the vibe I
was receiving from him. I glared at him before plopping down into one of
the seats and propped my feet up on the back of the chair in front of me.
"I don't believe we have a choice," Dawn sighed. He began to open
his mouth to disapprove but I growled deep in my throat and glared sharply.
He turned on his heels toward the stage.
"Jared! Stupid boy! Jared! Where are you?!" It took every bit of
willpower to suppress what I wanted to do to that cocky man-child. To rip
off his organ would be a gesture of kindness. I wanted to hurt him in the
cruelest way possible. At the same time, I was overwhelmed at the fact I
was acting this harshly for a friend who'd I'd barely known for more than 2
months. I knew he would get what was coming to him, though if he ever laid
a hand on Dawn ever, ever again, may the Lord help his soul.
*******
I occupied the theatre for weeks of rehearsals before I felt that
Dawn was strong enough to do it alone. Some would think it was out of
selfishness. That I wanted Dawn all to myself. Others would smile as if
it were an act of Friendship. I did love her. Loved her more than I ever
thought I could love someone. And it terrified me. There were so many
things that made me shelter away. I remember it had taken 2 years of
steady friendship from Gretchen before I'd excepted a date. A Date.
I was already living with Dawn.
Why did she have to be so kind and gentle? Why did I always have
to have this constant need to feel her presence. It was irritating as well
as intriguing. I knew I held no control over whom I fell in love with but
at such haste after Gretchen?
"Iya! Phone!" Dawn yelled. I groaned, and slumped into the
kitchen, picking up the cordless.
"Hello?"
"Hey! I wanted to know if you wanted to go out tonight?" Olivia's
perky voice echoed in my head.
"Sure, can I bring my roommate?"
"Absolutely! The more the merrier. We'll meet you in front of the
club at 10."
"Okay, later Olive."
"Don't call me that," she growled. I just laughed and hung up.
"DAWN!" She peered around the top of the couch.
"Yes oh Screamish one."
"Take a shower. We're going out tonight," I grinned, knowing she
wouldn't try and refuse.
*******
"Iya," she whined. "I don't want to go to a club. I just want to
stay at home with a book and a cup of cocoa."
"You need to get out!" I declared, dragging her down the street by
her arm. "Besides, what's the point of living in New York City if you
weren't going to enjoy it?" Dawn sighed. I was positive that this night
on the town was just what Dawn needed. She needed to forget the last
couple of weeks. She needed to forget the shows opening next week. She
needed to be a young adult.
"Okay, but if I get tired, we leave."
"Scouts honor." She smiled, and slipped her arm through mine.
Finally, willingly, going to have fun. "There they are! Olivia!" The red
haired nymph turned and ran to them, hugging them both.
"You made it! You must be Dawn," she smiled. I watched Dawn's
eyes change from tired, to charged. Yes, this was what she needed. I
hugged Love, Damien, and Jack and introduced them to Dawn along the way.
But it didn't pass over me when Jack checked Dawn out from head to toe. I
kept my anger at bay and helped push our way to the front where we were
immediately let in.
"Do you wanna dance?" Jack yelled to Dawn. She accepted and the
two were engulfed into the sea of bodies. I groaned and started for the
bar but Olivia grabbed me.
"No. No. No drinks for you. You're going to dance with me,
sweetie," she smiled and pulled me with her. It was a dance version of
some song I didn't recognize. Just forget. If I could just forget, I
could have fun. And forget I did.
That is, until I saw Jack and Dawn making out in the corner of the
club. A stab of jealousy ripped through my body. She had just recovered,
barely and now. . .Ugh! I felt helpless, yet I had no power to begin with.
Frustrated, I went to the bar, against Olivia's protests and ordered a Long
Island Ice Tea.
"You have to tell her!" Olivia shouted. "Good God if you could
only see the look in her eye when she looks at you! She's just as much in
love with you as you are with her. Go for it!"
"I can't," I said flatly.
"Why not?"
"There's too much she doesn't know. Too much that she doesn't need
to know." Olivia growled in frustration.
"I give up!"
"Good. It's best to give up with a Moon woman than to keep
pushing," I spat and drank the alcoholic beverage quickly. She took it away
and picked me up. Well, yanked me up by the arm and dragged me to where
Jack and Dawn were still making out. "Are you trying to torture me?" I
yelled.
"I'm gonna settle this!" she stopped and tapped the two on the
shoulder. Both looked up with dazed expressions. Great, I thought, she's
drunk. "I need to talk to Dawn," Olivia told Jack and pulled her up as
well. She led us down the hallway to the bathrooms where the music wasn't
so loud.
"What's up?" Dawn asked. I just looked down, waiting for Olivia to
straighten it out. Far be it for me to get in her way, but I wasn't going
to do it myself.
"Are you in love with Iya?" Olivia asked. I was shocked by her
bluntness, yet pleased. No beating around the bush. I looked up and my
eyes caught with Dawn's. Both of us looked away quickly, as if we were 5th
graders.
"Yes," Dawn whispered. Olivia turned to me. Oh no.
"Iya," she grinned. "You're in love with Dawn, correct?" I wanted
to rip out her throat. I appreciated what she was doing but this was. . .
"Yes," I grumbled.
"There. Now it's settled. Kiss and make out." Oh, she would've
loved that. Dawn just spun on her heals and walked away. I sighed and
leaned against the wall. Great.
"Thanks," I said dryly before returning to the bar. Olivia still
stood, completely confused, in the hallway. "Welcome to my world," I spat
and ordered straight vodka.
*******
'Back to Square One' was an understatement. Dawn and I spent the
new week avoiding each other. When the play opened, she hadn't purchased a
ticket for me and I didn't have the finances to purchase one myself. So, I
spent the evening reading on the couch.
Dawn returned at 3 in the morning, piss ass drunk. "Hello,
darling," she smiled, tripping over her boots.
"Hello, sugar. How did the opening go?" I asked, not looking up
from my book.
"Absolutely fabulous. Every newspaper in the city was there. The
review will be in tomorrow's newspaper."
"Good," I smiled. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed." I got
up and slipped into my room.
"Good night, darling," Dawn called, her vocabulary slurred. I
pulled my hair back into a ponytail and got under the covers of my bed. At
least everything was going her way. Well, we would find that out tomorrow
in the newspaper.
*******
The sound of Dawn screaming woke me up. Terrified, I ran into the
living room. In the middle of the room, Dawn was struggling with Jared.
"You fucking ass hole," I grumbled, pulling him off of her. The
smell of alcohol was thick on his clothing. He spun me around and slammed
me against the wall.
"Ah yes. The little woman," he chuckled.
"Not quite," I smiled and kicked him in the groin. He toppled to
the floor. "Now, Dawn. Help me take out the trash?"
"Gladly." We each took a side and threw him out the door.
"If you ever, and I mean ever, lay a hand on her again, I'll remove
a vital body part and shove it down your throat." He got up, brushed off
his jacket and gave me the finger.
That was the last time we saw Jared. That night, he was in a car
accident and killed instantly.
--
*grabs a tissue* There's the end of Chapter 4. I know this chapter is
pretty short but I'm sure y'all can manage until Ch. 5 right? Holy
Geez..we've already made it to Chapter 5! AAHH! Okay, well, until next
time:
Safe Passage and Don't forget to smile,
Secret Dreamer <dreamsecret@poetic.com>