Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2011 15:29:34 -0400 From: Avery A Volpus <inabelljar@gmail.com> Subject: Hot Palms Pt. 4 (by Audrine Vice) Under the fire of a sinewy hand, she waited, tensed, sallow and translucent when the moon waned. A lip, a gauged ear and a pierced nose rising through her spine, warmer than her, and darker, deepening her as she tried not to waver, faced forward. She'd been shivering in a pale pink undershirt, feeling the red dig marks from the boning of a fitted gown still lacing her sides. Unlike her cluster of flat-ironed friends who blushed at the thought of being found across the tracks on the rough eastern edge of town, Tess would habitually borrow her mother's Mercedes, maybe steal her father's dusted hobby moped if she dared, and quietly spin down to the narrower streets of the projects, averting her eyes from the second looks of dark street wanderers after midnight, sticking to streetlights. She'd learned the area without ever being taught, knew the grid from 2nd street to Morton, pondered stopping in once at an all-night burger joint her friends would have described as "scummy." Watching her friends exit the party earlier, Tess held her breath, feeling strange for anticipating an empty house, and nervously reached for her phone, texted a JROTC boy she once hooked up with, and asked where Jeri lived. I need a homework assignment, she added for reassurance. He told her a street name "but you probably don't know where it is." An image of four stale white split-level homes, quadruplets, crossed her mind. Don't worry, I know where that is, she thought. Thanks anyway, she texted. Three minutes after eleven, the wind was picking up; she felt she shouldn't have come. She knew she shouldn't have, really, knew that nothing that would or wouldn't happen here could be good, but she had to see what would happen. Another night dozing off among a pile of cans and streamers, plateful of uneaten carrot cake in her lap, was not what she wanted, though what she did want, she didn't know. At the sound of a car door slamming, her nipples hardened with startle and chill, her back tightened around her spine like an uncomfortable hug. "Who's that?" A wary voice barked in the near-dark. Tess could see Jeri clench her fists, a rapid self-defense response, though she seemed calm, if tense, confident in her own protection. Tess wondered if she kept a knife in her pocket. "It's me," she stuttered weakly, then spoke up in the silence. "Tess." There was no disappearing now, the black Vespa hidden in the shadows on the curb, watching quietly. Tess wanted to cry; she suddenly realized she was scared of Jeri, this boy, this woman, a bitter hard eggshell cradling a voice that attempted to be thick but was soothingly feminine. Jeri's fists remained tight, unconsciously, but she visibly relaxed her stance, even more than she usually did. Tess held her breath until Jeri spoke from across the short span of concrete driveway. "What are you doing at my house?" She sounded mildly annoyed, but mostly perplexed, and rather exhausted, as if she had little capacity for surprises. She moved closer, her stance softened. Tess, too, looked exhausted, but more of a long-term exhaustion tangled her hair, wracked her face, her eye makeup gently smudged, her skin coated in chillbumps than ran down her sloping breasts. Jeri's eyes drifted as far as they could go into her decolletage and returned hesitantly to eye contact. Tess took a deep breath, completely unsure of how to explain herself, and jumped on the first thought she had--the thought that had put her feet on the bike and driven her across the railroad. "What are you doing next year?" "What?" Jeri scrunched her eyebrows. "After this. After we graduate." Jeri's mouth gaped slightly. She obviously had not expected a late-night questionnaire on her life's trajectory, and Tess expected her to snap, but she softened, vulnerable, surprised that anyone would ask, especially this girl. "Too soon to tell, I guess. Not for you, I guess, but for me." Jeri stared off past Tess. "Marines, maybe, you know, JROTC buddies going and all. I don't know. I mean, I've thought about it--" "I don't want to go to college." Jeri cocked her head, listening. "I'm sorry. I know you don't care. You don't give a shit." She stopped, but Jeri was still waiting, so she continued without planning her words. "Everyone's so excited. I got into my dream school. Whatever. I just picked it out of a hat, you know, it seemed like the best idea, close enough to home, lots of girls--" She wondered why she said lots of girls-- "and I can cheer still--" She was choking on her words as they tumbled out, stumbling like a blubbering child, but her face was still. Jeri sat. "What's wrong?" she murmured. Tess felt her stomach sink between her legs. Jeri's eyes were big; her bare eyelashes were long and fluttering. She suddenly felt unexplainably attached to Jeri by a physical static, like they were caught in tangles of yarn, and she couldn't move, staring helplessly. "--I just want to run away. That's all. I don't want to be where they want me. I just want to take the car and drive as far away as I can until I run out of gas, and then get out and walk farther, I just want someone to pick me up and take me somewhere else--" Jeri's hand was on hers, and startled, Tess jerked her hand a bit. Jeri looked apologetic, and Tess reached back and grabbed her hand, out of breath. Dead silence. The crickets and swamp frogs elevated their sound all around the porch. Tess slumped forward into a heap in Jeri's arms, and Jeri quickly supported the weight of the girl sitting beside her, cradling her. Tess felt Jeri's lips in her hair. Her pale, cold face turned upwards, and she tasted cigarette smoke as her lips clamped against Jeri's, forcefully, with Jeri forcing back, holding Tess by her narrow hips. She had closed her eyes, hearing nothing but the crickets telling the temperature, feeling the dark swallow her as Jeri swept her up and carried her quietly inside. Up bumpy stairs, Jeri had shifted Tess's body into the crook of her elbow to reach for a light switch. The bulb flickered on, and Tess opened her eyes to see herself across the room, reflected in a full-length leaning mirror, draped across Jeri's arms, her face flushed. She saw Jeri's hands gripping underneath her thighs and touching the skin on her back, secure. Her mind's eye adjusted to an image that had never crossed it before, and she was terrified, and yet soothed. Focused, Jeri laid her down on her bed, the covers rumpled. She felt Jeri's weight on her, lying like a silent observer, out of her body, and then saw Jeri pull back, unsure. Tess smiled faintly up at the golden-skinned brunette, and Jeri reached back and yanked out a hair tie. Tess's eyes adjusted to this ever-new person, suddenly framed by cascading brown hair down to her shoulderblades, hanging down to tickle Tess's neck.