Date: Sun, 28 May 2006 16:07:03 -0300
From: dirtsgalore@hotmail.com
Subject: speechlessly in love (lesbian highschool)

there is this girl that ive been crushing on since middle school i saw
her in grade 7 and thats the year i foud out i was gay not at the moment
did i notice her infact i didnt notice her till one of my friends
introduced me to her it turns out there good friends and have been for
ever. I wasnt sure how i felt about her for a long time since i haven
never crushed on a boy let alone a girl. The night i realized i loved her
was when were were haning out at li'z house and katie her bestfriend was
there liz didnt tell me she was going to be there so when i showed up and
katie was there i knew that i liked her mayb a little bit more then a
friend becuase seeing her gave me chills of being nervous and of
excitment.

 Liz then asked her mum if we could both spend the night i was so excited
but i couldnt understand it myself like hey im not a lesbian but i never
really told my self that i liked boys either so i gave it a try i just
let the thought kick around in my head, i wasdnt sure if it was jus me
but katie kept very close to me but hey i just met the girl mayb shes a
touchy feely kind of person which usually drive me nuts but this time it
was ok.

 the next morning i woke up and she was snuggled up next to  me i was
about to just touch her soft gentle face as soon as i raised my hands to
touch her soft face liz woke up beside me and said "oh i see you met
katie in the middle of the night" ya i agreed unsure of what she meant by
that then she said "for some reason she tends to snuggle right into
people in the middle of the night its kinnda of weird but you will get
used to it" well having her hug me so tight with her nice soft loving
eyes shut but still as they were shut i can feel the warmth of them as if
they were looking back at me. But still that wasnt when i found out i was
gay that part shall come along sooner then you think.

  most of grade 7 is boring details like that but grade 8 things get a
little different. this girl me and katie are both friends with this girl
angela and she has been cutting herself as we both noticed we talked to
her about it but she said she was fine boys when a girl says their fine
their lying we both gave her some chances like mayb everything is ok but
after a month of the same harsh cuts across her wrist we told the
guidance counsol and well after words we were both well i cant describe
it we jus looked at each other and cried i held her in my arms and for
sumreason i found the strenght my arm was broken at the time from a fall
down the stairs(yes im a cluts)

I was getting to know her so much in grade 8 we would hang out just us
and sometimes she would jus take my bus to hang out it was great but
still i was unsure of how i felt and how she felt to we used to play this
staring game we would jus sit and stare at each other while the other one
wasnt looking who ever stared at the other one for the longest time won
it was great for me becuase when ever i would zone out on her beautiful
face with teeth full of metal from her braces but to me she had the
straightest smile in the world with her purple died hair turning a light
brown color and  well i would just get lost, she may not sound that
pretty but some people have all the wrong features that come together and
for some reason work with her extram small size of 4'11 and small wieght
of 105 mostly muscle becuase she was a cheerleader.

the summer of grade 8 came and so did camp a lot more happend that week
then anything else we seemed to get close she would come up to my bunk
and she would jus watch me or she would get me to take her to the
bathroom in the middle of the night she was my little homely puppie thats
when i found out the sadder parts of her life how her parents divorced
and how much she missed people around her and his brothers girlfriends
death it was quite bad and i myself hate hugs like i dont even hug my
parents but i would give her a nice tight but gentle hug and she would
return the favour but sometimes a hug wouldnt solve it i could hear her
crying at night and that hurt me a lot knowing that i couldnt fix the
worl for her and cast away her dakr skies.

Finally grade 9 came along highschool which didnt bring much onto me
because my angle katei found aboy friend that was when i started feeling
low and stupid that year i got into some bad things i tried to commite
sucide many times with that it bugged me so much but one thing that stuck
to me was what a sunday school teacher said to me they said "if you
truely love somebody then they must love you back or else it isnt true
love" and thats what kept me going, i knew i really loved her so she must
love me too

june came and i remeber the day it was wonderful in a sad way it wasjune
5th a tuesday and my cell rings at 8:30 in the morning a crying voice
says hello Ange are you there me being a smart ass and all said yes who
else would answer her cell phone, then i realized it wasnt my turn to
talk just to listen. She could barely talk but she came out with the
words that to this day make me shiver,Ange can you come over to my house
i need you. She didnt have to finish her sentence before i hoped a bus
over to her house. the bus droped me off at least 3 blocks away from her
house i ran as fast as i could.

when i got to her house i knocked on her door, it opend up like on scary
movies with a creak and nobody else was home so well me being the stupid
blonde in the movie(except my hair is died bright red) i walked right
inside and turned into her completly messy room, just with my luck i fell
on to a pile of dirty blankets katie my messy little girl. the blanket
was rather bumpy and well my blanket doesnt normally sob, damn i stay
inside my head to long it was katie, i got up quick extreamly embareassed
but one little smile made everything go away, she just gave me a hug and
said thank you, i soon felt her rub her nose against my shoudler which
sickly enough as it is senmt shivers down my spine and she said Ange
thanks a lot and gave me a little kiss on the check after knowing katie
for so long you no that its just her being sweet but gosh i take it to
heart everytime just hoping for me. That night she asked me to stay the
night at her house

we decided it was a good idea to start drinking with out guys you dont
have to worry about anything bad happening like a child. I guess we are
really cheap drin ks becuase i only remeber having like 2-3 coolers
before being out like a light. what was weird was when i woke up it had
only been an hour and i saw 12 coolers around me and katie. she was
loaded so was i and well we started playing some weird games but the
funny part was i wasnt i jus pretened to be. That way if things did go to
far i could just say that i was drink, she dared me to kiss her it was
crazy i couldnt believe that she said that and the weird part was i said
no me i said no but katie i guess she just wouldnt hear of it she must
have been loney after breaking up with her long time boyfriend she leaned
in really slowly and touched my face ever so lightly and said to me "Ange
you are my angle look after me and make sure i turn out ok" before i knew
what i was saying i already said " Katie you are more beautiful than an
angel you are my heaven you are my world then she leaned in for a kiss it
was soft and slow lasting only seconds but i was trapt for ever sucked
into her unalbe to move she then stoped kissing me, i almost wanted to
cry like a little kid but she spoke before i could say anything ,Ange i
dont want this to be remeber as a drunken mistake i want you to remeber
this so go to sleep and we'll talk in the moring, (who said that we'll
talk is horrible)

the next morning couldnt have come sooner all night i couldnt get her out
of my mind i cant believe she said that to me. when i woke up i noticed
my angel katie wasnt by my side huging me closely. i called her name then
i just heard the tolite flush, Ange do you remeber what happend last
night she asked as she came walking into her room while i was on her bed,
i nodded just unalbe to speak, well she said i have never done that
before and i noticed a sound of guilt in her voice but then she picked
herself up and said well i dont regret what i did Ange when i said i love
you well i meant it and well i want you to love me too that kiss to me
meant the world, that was when i knew i loved her. I noticed again she
was starting to cry i took my hands and wipe away all of her tears i
asked her why she was crying and she said well if you ran away or thought
that i was a freak or a perv that would brake my heart, i only dated that
guy because somebody told me that you were straight i was trying to
search for love but it was straight in front of me. with that we both
burst into tears becuase we finally understood each others troubles and
wanted to make it beter our lips found each other and first lightly
touched then trying to make up for all the lost time we grabbed each
other she wrapped her small muscular legs around me and was thrusting her
pelvis against me and then said i cant slow down i love you to much and
her tears came hard and her kissing more meaning full and hard she then
started to part my lips with her tongue and i let her in un sure of what
to do with it i just took my tonugue and slide it around her tongue it
was beautiful she moved her hands looking for the buttons to my pj top
and opend me up i shivered at the thought of her seeing me then i felt
scared but when she just looked at me like she had seen heaven and smiled
and slowly started to take off her own top i knew it was going to be ok,
i never thought that breast wsere beautiful up until the day i saw
katie's but then again why should i be amazed everything about her was
perfect but thats what amazed me she was everything and more she came
towards me slowly with her shirt just naked from the waist up and i as
well and we looked then touched each other slowly she got this weird
smile on her face and came back with some lube from her brothers room, i
didnt need any lube i wass already wet enough but it was ky gell and she
put it on her tongue i bet it tasted gross and thats when she went down
on my it was magical she took her tongue and slowly started flicking my
clit i was speechlessly in love my best friend my girlfriend making me
please how i only heard porn stars felt and making me feel beautiful and
whole like a woman soon she told me to turn over and said get ready
virgin i wasnt sure what she was going to do but i felt this warm object
move insdie my ass i felt a shapr pain and she heard me gasp and said
dont worry baby pain for pleasure and soon i felt my self trying to grip
it and move farther back on it when i was really starting to like it she
said its time for both of us to have loads and loads of fun she showed me
this long dildo or atleast i think it was a dildo and she slowly eased it
insdie her self and said lets fuck in a sluttly tone it was crazy it
drove me nuts and she thrusted it into me really hard i bet france could
hear me scream she just giggled and i knew everything was ok and we
started to screw each other it was like we were men and women at the same
time i would force the dildo in her me being the guy then she would put
it inside me, me being the girl. i was just speechlessly in love