Date: Mon, 20 Oct 2008 03:25:48 -0400
From: J. V. <ciadow@live.com>
Subject: No can't be an answer

No, can't be an answer. by J.V.

You know there is the usual disclaimers.

This is notepad people so the font may give you a headache... then if
female/female relationships offend you turn back now!!! Since feedback is
the basis of begining writes feel free to send me comments good or bad.
Under 18 you know the deal, or if it is illegal in your state or province,
either way. This is a series about sex and love. bear with me send all
feedback to ciadow@live.com =] enjoy.


"I loved you Nikki!"  She muttered. So I turned around to look at her. She
was crying, and I was dying inside knowing I had caused her so much pain. I
never meant to, honestly I don't know how I did. She is my sister for god's
sake. I looked up into the sky for some answer it was right for me to tell
her. It was a clear day, blue skies, bright sun, not hot but pleasantly
warm.  Too many times have I heard her say "I hate you", but never had "I
loved you" came out her mouth. She turned her head away from my eyes, as I
tried to look inside for some truth and she walked back to her car with the
little pride she had left.

~inside my mind, before this, before everything.~

I lived in a very conservative college town brought up as a Christian,
homosexuality was wrong and the whole nine. I knew I had good looks; I was
brought up to become a proper housewife and Christian mother. I was a
straight A student. Light brown hair to my mid back. I am about 5'6" and
180 pounds. I have a 38 C breast. A smooth stomach down to my pussy with
soft curly hair except my pussy lips which I learned shaved, gives you more
feeling when my boyfriend roughly stuck his fingers there to "arouse" me. I
tolerated it, so later I could fuck myself to a measly orgasm. I have dark
brown eyes, and ivory colored skin.  Well back to the story. I settled in
my dorm early, thinking people weren't expected to come for a few days.
But, the bed besides me was already covered and stuff on the nightstand. It
was one big room with two beds, two desk, and two dressers. I rolled my
shirts and pants and placed them into my drawer, a trick I learned that
kept my clothes less wrinkled. Then made my bed, looked at the ceiling and
hoped that my roommate wasn't attractive.

I woke up around ten and went to the showers. I was pretty sure I was alone
in the building which was a small house and had two floors. On the bottom
were the living room, showers, and bathroom. With one bedroom I think was
for one person. The second floor had three bedrooms each for two people. I
walked in a towel with my clothes and things to the showers took off my
towel, ready to take a shower when I stepped on the cold tiles and realized
I forgot to bring my flip-flops barely putting my towel on heard someone
come in and looked to see a girl also in a towel.  Not caring or noticing I
was there she took off her glasses, and towel put the water to run, when
she dropped the towel I saw her back, and then she turned and noticed me,
all I could do was stare, at her petite body. She squinted a little, and
laughed. "Oh I'm sorry; I thought I was the only one here."

  She had a lean and sexy figure. I turned away flushed. "Um, I um, am
Nikki." I laughed and went to shake her hand, when I remembered she was
naked and stepped back, "sorry" I whispered, "Hi then well I'm going to
take a shower, you too?" I laughed at the irony of the situation and took
off my towel to hell with the flipflops and went into the shower. Turning
on the water, I yelled out "DAMN!!!" She turned off the water and asked "Is
something wrong? Are you ok?" "No, this water is fucking cold I yelled,
jumping out of the shower to get away from the freezing pellets hitting
me. Rubbing my shoulders I put the hot water all the way on, I think she
said something but I didn't hear anything as she yelled yeah I forgot to
tell you I learned this is the only shower with hot water in the
morning. I'll be out in...now" she opened the curtain, and walked out to
get her towel.  "By the way I'm Rebecca...

There you go", she smelled good like coconuts as she passed by me.  I said"
Thank you, Rebecca is it?"  Reaching for the counter she answered "yup"
smiled wiped her glasses put them on and finally looked at me. Now it was
her chance to stare, a few seconds past but it felt like an hour as I hoped
she like what she saw.  It wasn't awkward but I went into the shower, and
liked the hot water trickling down my body.

...Thinking about her...

 She had these mysterious hazel eyes. Silky soft skin, short, about 5'3",
rich auburn colored hair thick and wavy a little below her shoulders, she
wore frameless pink glasses and was about 128 lbs a 34b with a long button
nose, flat tone stomach, a cute tight butt, and hardly any hair on her legs
and arms with long slim fingers that were the very essence of femininity.
My sister and I were both in college. We were one year apart. Meaning we
were always together growing up, of course I was the more mature one, and
she was the more outgoing. When I got to college, I was happy I would not
have her breathing down my neck. I also figured out I would look into my
feelings; I liked girls more then guys.  I never fully came out though,
just buried myself in notes and papers.

Breaking up with my boyfriend of two months, before going to college was
relief, as soon as I turned 18 I started going to gay clubs I told my mom I
was taking a break from dating when she asked if I had a new boyfriend
because in high school i was exchanging boyfriends every few months, until
my parents gave up hope that I would have a stable relationship in high
school and didn't want to meet my new boyfriends. And now they were worried
that I didn't have one. Ever since I was in eighth grade I noticed that I
looked at girls more then I would guys. I didn't know it was attraction. I
thought it was envy, I would get warm inside if I knew a beautiful girl was
around and tried to hide my feelings. But never had I gotten this wet with
a guy.

 I knew I couldn't do anything about this feeling under my parents roof,
but I gained this scholarship this was my money now, and I was going to
date who I pleased I wasn't looking for a relationship, just some sex no
strings attached. I had few attachments, but those I was willing to give my
heart to they didn't want to go steady. In my old dorm my roommate was
straight as a board I thought I had no hope with her, but one day after she
broke up with her boyfriend she kissed me. That led to amazing sex and then
she regretted it the next day, asking me to keep it quiet and I did until
it was time to part ways, and now I have a new dorm, and new roommate who I
hoped I wouldn't have any attraction to. Was she my roommate? I saw someone
had there stuff already in my room.

When I finished washing my hair and body, and got out wrapped the towel
around my body and used the extra one for my hair. Walked up the stairs and
opened the door, which I hadn't closed before, uh oh.

This was bad; there she was laying on the bed her mp3 player blaring in her
ears seemingly los tin thogught, or reading a book, i soon crossed that out
as she turned to get up and saw me. I closed the door behind me and went to
get my clothes, when she looked up and saw me. I looked at her with pure
fear in my eyes. She almost looked confused, with concern in her
eyes. "What's wrong? Did I scare you? I'm sorry, so you're my roommate, I
wasn't here last night. She smiled and looked into my eyes for some
confirmation of anything. "Oh, if it worries you I won't look at you get
dressed, if that's what bothering you."

"No, that doesn't worry me; I just didn't think you'd be my roommate that's
cool. Well, were both women here..."  "Haha yeah besides we've already seen
each other already" She sat on her bed, looking at the clothes in my hand.
"That's what you're going to wear?" Pointing at the shirt, panties and
shorts I picked out.  "Yeah I was thinking of just sleeping in." I answered
rationally; I untied the towel on my hair letting it fall then shook
it. Patted it dry then let go of the wrap around my body. I put on my
shirt, letting her get a good look of my pussy and then my panties and
shorts. She had on a pair of hip huggers and a tight red shirt, "Haha I
wish I could do that but I have summer classes, see you later then?"  Once
I put on my clothes she gave me a kiss on the cheek walking out the door
leaving me with thoughts running wild. That kiss went to my toes. Are
friendly kisses supposed to do that?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There is something about that girl, it's like we met before. When I walked
into my dorm this morning I noticed a girl sleeping on the bed that has
been empty for the summer. Unfortunately, I only saw her backside her face
contorted by the pillow. I was at my girlfriend Samantha's house; No, not
girlfriend as in girlfriend but as in girl friend. Let's get one thing
straight. I am. I have a steady boyfriend named Josh. He's sweet and
respectful; Chiseled abs, taekwondo body. I don't know if that's an
accurate description but lets just say he's gay man hot and straight
woman's fantasy of a lover.  With straight light brown hair and dark
penetrating brown eyes, he would make the perfect husband and create
beautiful babies ha-ha.  He was my first and only. I've been with him 3
years.,

Today in the shower got a very good look of another woman, I've looked
before but I was in a trance when I saw her. She was what a real woman
should be. Not skinny and not fat.  Curves in the right places nipples to
die for, wait why I am thinking this of another girl. Then she talked to
me. Her voice was so hypnotic, not sure but definitely calming, a purr to
it.  I couldn't be sure if I was right until I put my glasses back on. And
she was definitely my type. You know if I was...gay. I'm 21.  And...and I
don't know, she just looks like a person I can connect with. Yeah...connect
with, I went back into the room, lie on the bed and put my mp3 to help me
cover up my thoughts. I have plenty of gay friends, who have respected by
not trying to come on to me, but sometimes I think what if.

 Oh shit I have a class. Since my music was blasting I didn't notice
someone coming in. It was her. And she was in a towel. I sat up, trying to
act normal. But truth is I felt no where near it. Her skin looks so smooth.
I bet it was soft too. I tried to start a conversation, it was so stupid.
"Hey that's what you're wearing?"  I tried to get away so I kissed her
cheek. And walked out saying I had a class; her cheek, my lips. I liked the
way it felt.  I think I lingered a little too long. I felt the heat rising
in my cheeks as I pulled back, so I turned and left her there to get
dressed before I saw her, Naked... again.