Date: Sat, 12 Jan 2002 14:18:10 -0800
From: Angel <astargrl@cswnet.com>
Subject: The Poem
This is a fictional, lesbian-based stoy that involves sexual and
romantically emotional feelings and if topics such as lesbian sex or
homosexuality bother you, please do not bother to read this story.
*Dedicated to a very special person in my life, Meg, I will never forget
you.
__________
The Poem
It was near midnight and I was sitting on the cliff over the beach as
I wrote line after line of poetry. I lived in a house by the lighthouse
that was just on the coast of Rhode island.
I had a few beach houses up for rent because it was getting in that
season. I hadn't any tourists yet but I figured that it was a little early
in the season befor they'd start to come.
I sat there with a notebook and pen in my hand, staring at the crashing
waves on the ocean and how bright the stars were that night. I thought to
myself why I never seemed to get tired of the same scenario day by day. I
figure it was my home, and it was where my heart was centered.
1.
Soon enough it was touring season and I hadn't seen as many tourists
as I had expected. I had been sitting by the phone for hours before the
phone finally rang.
"Hello?" I said in my greeting voice
*click* (The person on the other line had hung up on me.)
I took the phone away from my ear, let out a sigh and put it down. I waited
a few minutes then it rang again.
*ring*
I answered it.
"Hello?"
"Yes, I'm calling about the beach houses for rent. I saw an ad in the paper
and I was wondering if one was still available." a feminine voice said.
"Yes, in fact there are a few still available."
"Great. The ad said $200 a month, right?"
"Yes, plus the bills."
"Okay, I'll come over and look at it right now."
*click*
"Name please?" I said but then realized that she had hung up.
About ten minutes later a car pulled up in the driveway and a young
female who seemed to be in her mid 20's stepped out of the car. She walked
up the walkway and knocked at the door. I answered it.
"Hello, I just called you not too long ago about the beach house."
"Oh, okay, come right this way." I said as I led her to each of the beach
houses and showed her around to them.
"I'll take this one." She pointed to a small blue house farther away from
the others
"Great. Do you need any help unpacking?"
"No, I think I can get it. Thank you, though."
She walked back to her car and opened the trunk. She tried to carry a
few boxes and she was a few feet from the car when she dropped a box and
clothes flew everywhere. I ran up to her and kneeled down to help pick up
the clothes.
"No I'll get it." she said
"Please, let me help."
As I was reaching for one of her shirts, we both had grabbed the same
one and her hand was just where mine was. I looked down at our hands and
hers had accidentaly been put atop of mine. I blushed, looked at her then
pulled my hand back. I could see her looking at me through the corner of my
eye. I looked up at her and she smiled at me. I put the last shirt in the
box and carried it to her beach house. As soon as we had put everything up,
I was about to walk back to my house when she had stopped me.
"Hey, wait... don't go yet." she said
"Yes?"
"Would you like to.. join me for dinner tonight?"
I hesitated, wondering why, but wanted to be polite and not make her feel
uncomfortable.
"Sure."
"Okay, I'll call you."
"Great. I'm Andrea, you?" I said.
"Mandy." she said.
"Ok, see you later."
"You too. Bye."
I closed the door behind me and walked back to my house which was at
least fifty yards away. I turned around to wave at her but she was already
inside by the time i had reached my house. A few hours had passed while I
was watching my TV and the sky was turning its golden-like color, the way
it changes just before sunset. After I had put on my perfume, makeup and
shoes, I walked out my door to the house about fifty yards away. I kocked
on the door.
"Come in." she said.
I opened the door, walkd inside then closed it.
"Hello."
"Hello," she greeted me back. "please have a seat."
I sat down on an old small couch after I took off my shoes.
"Would you like anything to drink?"
"No thanks." I said.
"Dinner's almost ready. Would you like to talk until then?"
"Sure," I answered "about what?"
"I don't know. Let's just start a topic."
"Okay."
I paused for a moment to think of something to say, but then the moment of
silence was broken.
"Have you ever had a husband?"
I was a bit suprised at the question but yet i continued to answer.
"No, you?"
She sighed for a moment and then raised her head and nodded.
"I used to have a husband, but we divorced a long time ago. He never could
realize that a marriage was a partnership. he constantly tried to take
advantage of me so I just had enough."
"Oh I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked."
"It's okay, I'm over him now."
I sniffed the air and I could tell dinner was done.
"I think dinner's done." I said.
"I'll go check."
She stood up from the couch, walked to the kitchen, opened the oven,
and with a hot-pad wrapped around the pan, pulled out our dinner. She lied
it on the stove and pulled the hot-pad off.
"I hope you like potato casserole." she said.
"Yes, I love it." I said, although I barely remember what it tasted like,
since I haven't had it since I was a kid.
She opened the cabinet and took out two plates.
After putting some potato casserole on my plate, she handed it to me. I
pulled up a wooden chair by the table and sat down. She handed me a fork.
"I'm sorry it's not the best of settings."
"Oh, it's alright. I don't live in a mansion either."
I smiled and took a bite of the casserole.
"This casserole is delicious!" I said after I had swallowed it.
"Thank you." she said and smiled.
I'd finished up eating, put up the dirty dish and was just about to
leave.
"I'd better go now, It's getting late. Thank you for the dinner, it was
delicious, and it was nice talking to you."
"No please, don't go, not yet." she said and stopped me.
"I.. I have to."
".. Okay, see you around."
I waved to her, opened the door and walked back to my house. That
night I tried to sleep, but realized that I couldn't because I'd felt
incomplete for some reason. (Should I have stayed? Why do I feel like
this? What can I do to make it stop? ... Writing! I thought, poetry...) I
got up from the bed, put on some comfortable clothes and walked outside to
the cliff above the beach. I sat down and started writing whatever came
into my head.
"Miles of sea under the neverending sky,
The reflection of the distorted sun upon the sea of ... waves,
The stars gleam as if sparkles from an eye,"
"No no no, that doesn't fit..." I said to myself.
"Andrea...?" a voice said in the darkness.
I stopped writing and looked around.
"Mandy?" I called, just to make sure.
"Yeah, it's me," she said. "what are you doing out here? It's late."
"I was just umm, just uhh, writing.."
She walked up closer to me.
"Mind if I..?" she started.
"Go ahead."
I handed her the notebook and looked back out at the ocean with my knees
bent upward and my arms crossed around them.
"Wow... it's good, but it's not done."
"Y.. yeah, it doesn't sound right."
"Which part?"
"About the sparkles from an eye."
"It just needs some word changing."
She sat down by me and thought of a few words that could fit.
"Sea of waves... Couldn't it be sea of gold.. for the golden sunset shining
on it?"
"Yes, yes thank you."
She handed me the notebook and I changed it.
".. The stars shine in the blackness up high.." she mumbeled in a soft
voice.
"What?" I said.
"Oh nothing, I was just thinking of the line. I'm sorry if I disturbed
you."
"No no no, it's.. it's perfect!"
"Really?"
"Yes, that fits perfectly."
"Great! Wow, look AT the sky! This will be a night I will never forget!
"Exactly!"
"Exactly?"
"Yes, the line. Okay, tell me how this sounds:"
"Miles of sea under the neverending sky,
The reflection of the distorted sun upon the sea of gold,
The stars shine in the blackness up high,
This will be a memory my heart will forever hold."
"Beautiful!" Mandy said.
"You really think so?"
"Yeah!"
"I still think it needs more."
"True, but it's a good start as is."
I smiled and watched the waves crash on the beach.
"I'm going back to bed," I said, "I can't think of anymore to write."
"Okay." she said.
"Goodnight." I said.
"Goodnight." she replied.
I picked up my notebook, stood up and walked out of the misty fog back
to my house. I looked outside the window and seen Mandy standing on the
cliff, looking out to the water. The light from the lighthouse circled
around and it seemed to glow eerily in the fog all around it.
I glanced over at my notebook and observed the 4-line poem. It just
didn't seem right. I wanted to finish it badly, but had no idea what else
to write or add onto it. I loked out the window again and thought of some
ideas.
"As every night comes around,
I stare into the moon,
And the misty wind carries the fog further,
Over the deep blue."
"There.. that's good." I thought to myself.
I could feel my body falling asleep on me so I got ready for bed, turned
off the lights and went to bed.
2.
The net day, I woke up and lied on the bed. Staring mindlessly at the
wall, my mind seemed to be somewhere else. I blinked a few times to get
myself out of daydreaming. I seemed to have focused on something else, and
didn't know what it was, just yet...
I took a shower, got dressed, walked outside and unlocked the
lighthouse door. I slowly opened the door and walked inside. I glanced
around the room, which had old pirate cutlasses and some of my old
belongings and decorations. I shut the door behind me and walked up the
long circular set of stairs that looked as if they were hundreds of years
old, from all of the stains and fractures on them to the top of the
lighthouse to get a nice view of the ocean. I figured I could try to write
some poetry on top, or at least meditate into a long, and peaceful
moment. I opened the door to the top of the lighthouse and closed it as
soon as I stepped out from the doorway. I looked around at the beautiful
ocean that lie before me. I walked closer to the edge and leaned against
the rail.
"Hello? Is that you Andrea?"
"Mandy?" I said.
"Yes, it's me."
"What are you doing? Why are you up here?"
"The door was unlocked... and I thought I might find you here, since you
weren't home or at the cliff."
"I, uhh, yeah."
She walked up closer to me and put her hands on the rail as well.
"It's beautiful..."
"Yes it is."
"How long have you lived here?"
"Since I was little." I said.
"Oh, in this house?"
"No, in the town."
"I was born in..." she started to say.
I looked at her.
"Where?" I said.
"Nevermind."
I shrugged.
"Okay."
A soft breeze blew across our faces and the sun shone brighter than
ever around the fluffy white clouds. Rays of light peeked their way out of
the clouds and the sounds of crashing waves filled the air. As if something
from a dream, I looked back at her, and the sun must have shone just right,
because her hair glowed from the rays of sunlight, her eyes lit up like
precious gems, and I have to admit, she looked like an angel, or so I
assume. I had never actually seen one, well, until now.
"My husband took me to a place like this once." she said.
"Really?"
"Yeah, this strangely reminds me of the place. The sun, the sky, the ocean,
everything."
I smiled.
"So, why did you two divorce in the first place, if I may ask."
"He... I..." she started, but she sighed and looked down at the
grass. "...it was just about then that I realized that I didn't really have
feelings for him anymore. I don't know."
"Was it someone else?"
"No, I was.."
"Yes?"
"I'm a lesbian."
At those words, a strange sensation came over me. Was it the simple
fact that I had never before met a live lesbian? Everything I heard about
them was untrue. Mandy didn't look like a slut, or a thug. She wasn't even
the least bit masculine. However, I was shocked, and didn't know how to
respond.
"I... I'd better go." I said.
"No please, wait!!"
I didn't answer her and walked down the stairs at a fast pace. I ran out
and locked myself in my house. After a few moments, I sat back in my chair
and thought about what just happened. I was scared, suprised, worried,
confused- I had mixed emotions! I had no idea what to do, so I just went to
bed without writing.
I couldn't seem to sleep, nor focus on sleeping that night. What have
I done, I kept asking myself. I'm not homophobic, I'm not prejudice, I
just... why? As soon as I sat up in bed, the image of the "angel" I saw
that evening came back in my head. Maybe this was a sign. Maybe this was a
chance for me to develop a close relationship, or... I had no idea. I
believe everything was meant for a reason... I believe.. love exists. The
passion of writing suddenly camne into mind.
"One by one my thoughts come into place,
Love might so possibly exist,
The one I seen with the angelic face,
Glowing through thick mist."
"Yes.. yes perfect.."
I didn't feel completely renewed, but I felt more secure and I could
finally seem to feel sleepy instead of guilty.
The next morning, I yawned, stretched, and crawled out of bed. It
didn't take me too long to remember what I done the previous day and after
all of my thinking, it all seemed to fit into place, like a
puzzle. Everything that happened, all of my thoughts, were like peices of
this huge puzzle. It also occured to me that I had a different feeling for
Mandy. It couldn't possibly be love, I thought, since I had only known her
for a few days. Though I knew, for a fact, that she had opened my eyes to
something more than the real understanding of a different sexuality. She
had opened my eyes to a part of my mind, and heart, that I had never before
discovered. She made me think.
I put on my jacket and walked outside to the cliff. For some reason,
it was cold, even it being about the end of Spring. It didn't take me long
to notice Mandy sitting on the cliff, but something was different. She
seemed... depressed.
"Mandy!" I said, and ran over next to her, then sat down by her.
"..Hi." she said in a calm, soft voice.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing, really."
"You must be freezing, here, take my jacket."
I took off my jacket and put it around her arms. I was freezing, but that
didn't matter.
"Thank you." she said, and looked up at me.
I wiped the tears from her eyes, and when I looked at her, her eyes and
face said it all. She tried to hold back a tear, but it managed its way
out. My heart was hurt now. I couldn't bear to see this angel suffer like
she was. I gazed into her deep blue eyes, and I was paralyzed. Something
about her face expression was obvious. It seemed as if she was wanting me
to kiss her, but knew that such a thing couldn't happen. I was so
mesmorised by her great beauty, that I forgot all else and the next thing I
knew, my lips were pressed up against hers and I was in my own little
world. It was magic. As soon as I pulled away from the kiss, I was so
hypnotized by the entire moment, that I just wanted to hold her in my arms
and never let go.
"Mandy, tell me where you were born."
"I was born..." she started.
"Please?"
"I was born here... in your house, but I moved."
I was even more shocked at hearing this. I thought she just came here
to vacation.. but.. I had no idea...
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I don't know."
I hugged her.
"Come here for a second. I want to show you something." she said.
"Okay."
She stood up and led me inside the house, my house. She stood beside
my bed, kneeled down and lifted a loose wooden board from the floor. I just
watched. She pulled out a small green sack and opened it. She put her hand
in and pulled out a necklace with a gold chain and a small blue stone in
the shape of a water drop, or teardrop.
"Is that yours?" I asked.
"Not anymore." she said, and put it around my neck, but after she put it on
me, she didn't take her arms off.
She kept her arms wrapped around me and I looked into her deep blue
eyes yet again. I loved those kisses. The kisses of an angel.
3.
It was the beginning of Summer and Mandy was just notified that she
had to leave within three days to go back to work. I dreaded this
day... She was going to leave... Would she come back? Would she forget
about me? Uncomfortable thoughts took over my mind and I was soon jumping
to conclusions.
Day two came around quickly and I was sure that I would have to let
her go soon. This wasn't easy... It just wasn't fair. I walked over to her
beach house to spend the last few days with her before she left. I knocked
on the door and she answered it.
"Hello." she opened the door and answered.
"Hi, I hope you didn't mind that I spend the last few days with you."
"No, I would never mind. Come in."
After awhile, we started talking to each other on the couch. We kept
talking, as if we had just met.
"Andrea?"
"Yes?" I answered.
"Would you like to... make love to me? I want to see how it feels for the
first time."
"You've never had it before?" I said.
"No."
"Wow, neither have I."
"I guess this could be a first time for the both of us..." she said.
"Yeah."
I took off her shirt and then she turned around. Her body was so
beautiful... So fresh, so sexy. I licked my lips and took off my shirt. I
had never done this before, so I was nervous. I wondered what she thought
about my body, my looks. I watched her take off my jeans, and then her
own. I didn't know what to do, where to touch, or even to touch her at the
moment. I was thinking too much. (Why was I thinking? Why couldn't I move?
Someone please help!)
I hesitated and wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her closer. I
looked into her beautiful angelic eyes and kissed her soft lips. She
unhooked my bra while we were kissing and she caressed my breasts with her
hands. I was instantly turned on by her soft touch and I kneeled down and
pulled off her panties. Being a virgin, I could only hope that what I was
doing was right and giving her pleasure. I stood on my knees under her
pussy and I moaned at the juicy wetness of her lips. I licked her lips and
I heard her moan. This was more than enough to make me want to go further.
I broke the barrier of her lips open with my tounge and I massaged her clit
with my own tounge. So many, yet so little thoughts were flowing my mind,
if any thoughts were, it was about Mandy.
"Mmmhh Andrea... I'd never been touched like this beforeeee
mmmmmmmnnnn...."
I was about to pass out from exitement when I heard her moan out my name.
As if she wasn't sexy enough, she just had to moan out my name in the
sexiest voice I ever heard. I had spent all day with her, giving pleasure,
getting pleasure. Just the thought of her gave me pleasure.
Night came around quickly and I had slept in her bed that night, right
beside her. I had done just as I had always wanted to do- to fall asleep in
someone's arms, and at last, this was my chance.
"Psst, Andrea." she whispered.
"Yeah?" I answered.
"... What if I'm unable to contact you when you move?"
I stroked her hair and kissed her.
"Don't worry, I'll call you." I said.
"Andrea, promise me something, okay?"
"I'll try."
"I'm moving back in a few days, so if you don't hear from me, in any way,
find yourself someone who deserves your love, because it will mean that I'm
unable to get in touch with you."
These very words broke my heart then, and still haunt me to this day. I
nearly cried.
"I.. I will never promise that..." I said. "I'm sorry, but once I find
someone worth my love, I promised myself to never stop loving them, and
Mandy.. you're worth it.."
"But don't wait around for me if I can't get in touch with you.."
"Mandy, I, I love you."
"I love you too, Andrea."
This was all I could bear without crying.
"I believe we will see each other again someday, because, if two people
truly love each other, love will find a way to unite them..."
She touched the side of my face and gave me a small kiss.
"I will never forget about you... Mandy."
That night, was the best, the worst, and the most emotional night of
my life. I was afraid of losing her the next day, But I knew that if she
really meant that she loved me, we would have to see each other once again
someday. I fell asleep in her arms that night and loved every minute I was
with her.
The next day arrived. I would eventually have to say goodbye... I
finally built up the strength to tell her I would miss her and I would see
her again someday.
She hugged me and gave me the rent money. I hugged her with my eyes closed
and tears rolling down my cheeks.
"I love you Mandy, please, don't forget me."
"I never will Andrea, I love you too," she said. "please, keep the necklace
I gave you, to remember me by, and keep your heart centered to the ocean
and stars, because whenever you look up at the sky and see a shooting star,
know, that hundreds of miles away, I'll be looking at that very same star,
and I'll be wishing to be able to see you again, and everytime you look at
the ocean, know that someday, I'll be sailing on that very same ocean, and
I'll greet you with open arms, so that we can sail away and live together
forever."
A tear of love and pasion rolled down my cheek as I gave her one last
goodbye.
"Goodbye, Mandy, I love you."
I watched her drive away in her car, and wondered if that meant the end of
such a strong love, but I believed everything had a reason... I just hope
this had a good one. I reached in my pocket to read the poem, but it was
gone. When I lost it, I thought I had lost all of my feelings. I searched
for it for hours and never found it. I searched for days, weeks, and
months, but never found it. maybe the ocean had carried it away... I didn't
know...
Months and months passed before I almost gave up hope, when one day, a
letter from Seattle arrived. Who could this be from?- I thought. I opened
it up and read the letter.
____________________________________________________________________________
Dear Andrea,
I know it has been so long since we seen each other, but I want you to
know that I still love you and you're the only person I love. By the way, I
found the poem in one of my coat pockets, no, this was YOUR coat... I
remember that day on the cliff, when you let me borrow it... Anyway, I
hope you didn't mind, but I decided to finish it for you, you know, as a
memento. Please read it carefully and I hope you enjoy it. I love you so
much.
Sincerely,
~Mandy
____________________________________________________________________________
I took the other piece of paper out and it so happened to be the poem:
____________________________________________________________________________
"Miles of sea under the neverending sky,
The reflection of the distorted sun upon the sea of gold,
The stars shine in the blackness up high,
This will be a memory my heart will forever hold,
As every night comes around,
I stare into the moon,
And the misty wind carries the fog further,
Over the deep blue,
One by one my thoughts come into place,
Love might so possibly exist,
The one I seen with the angelic face,
Glowing through the thick mist,
The "Drop Of The Ocean" is a gift made from love,
Matching the color of the wearers eyes,
The shine and shimmer stolen from the stars above.
Made of pure Sapphire to match the sea and sky,
I dost give the Drop Of The Ocean to the one I dearest care for,
Know that I love you too,
My neverending love for you will last forevermore,
I will never forget you..."
____________________________________________________________________________
That poem I have still makes me cry... I love Mandy so much... I
wanted to be with her as soon as I finished reading it.
A few more months later, when I was standing on the cliff, overlooking
the ocean I saw a small sailboat. Although many sailboats come around, this
didn't seem exactly ordinary. I walked up to the beach as the sailboat came
ashore... and of all people, Mandy walked out of it. She stood by the sail
and waved for me to come with her. I climbed into the sailboat and we
sailed away beyond the golden sun, beyond our wildest dreams would take us,
beyond the ocean and the neverending light of love.
_________
The End
-True love never dies.-