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Tuck To The Hills -*- Copyright 2003 by Ellen Hayes.
Any resemblance between the writings in this work, and any actual
persons or places, living or dead, are purely coincidental, except when
used for satirical purposes.
This work contains adult situations, adult language, adult concepts, and
possibly sex. If you are legally not allowed to read materials
containing such things, then you will be breaking the law by reading
this. I am not responsible.
Continuing to read this document, or storing it or reproducing it
in any format means that you explicitly affirm that you are legally
allowed to possess and read such materials in your city, county/parish,
state, and country.
All rights reserved. See the bottom for distribution rights.
Tuck To The Hills
***
19:39 26 Sep
"Are they following us?" Mike asked eventually.
"Not yet," I said. "Drive."
***
19:51 26 Sep
"I haven't seen any of 'em since we left," I said.
"How 'bout we stop and put you in the front seat," Mike suggested.
"Find a place..."
He did, eventually, pulling into a gas station. He jerked a thumb
at the pump, which I think meant I was supposed to monitor that while he
went in and paid.
***
19:59 26 Sep
And got food, I saw. "Jeez, Mike, can't you-"
"I'm hungry," he said, "and I didn't get dinner; I was too busy
getting stuff set up for this. Your mom and dad, by the way, are not
very happy, but they said as long as I went with you that it was okay."
"As if," I sneered.
"You got your camera?"
"Um." He HAd asked earlier... I checked my pockets, and found it.
"Yah, why?"
"Give it to me, I need it," he said, holding out his hand.
"For what?"
"To take pictures of your dead mutilated corpse so I can get your
insurance money," he lied. I didn't have any life insurance; I wanted
to be worth FAR more alive than not.
I sighed, and pulled the T4 out and handed it to him. "C'mon,
let's get going. I hate being stopped like this."
"You've got it bad," he commented.
"Yeah, well, why else would you be doing this with me?"
***
20:17 26 Sep
Some miles out of town, it was dark enough and safe enough that we
could stop again, this time to strip and kit up.
"Where's your laptop?" Mike asked as we both got naked.
"Gave it to Susan," I said, sliding on my capilene briefs. "I
don't think the charge would last that long, and I didn't think I could
pad it well enough either."
"Bummer," he said. "It'd be fun to play solitaire on it or-" He
blocked my kick with both his arms.
"Besides, I don't think we have much time to do that," I said as I
sat down to pull socks on. "Or much of anything else."
"Got that right," he affirmed. "Your mom thinks you're insane.
Speaking of which, I've got the shortwave and the batteries for it;
don't forget you need to carry 'em. Your mom insisted, and your dad
nodded."
"Damn," I sighed. That meant I'd better have it with me at the
end, which meant one of us would have to carry it from the beginning.
"You gonna try that leotard trick again?" he asked.
I sighed, and stopped, my pants half on.
"That's probably a big part of the problem, Tuck," Mike stated.
"What do you mean?"
"It's a tiny piece of, 'What Are You Going To Do'," he said in
capital letters, "which is the thing you're running away from, isn't-"
"I am NOT running away," I snarled. "Or I wouldn't have taken you.
But this is JUST the kinda shit that I was afraid of last time, except
Debbie's not involved.
"Everyone has their opinion about what I should do, and everyone
wants me to talk about it, think about it, discuss it, see more
alternatives, examine the ramifications, discuss the societal and moral
consequences, and on and on and on... I am just sick of it. It's been
going on over twenty-four hours now, and I don't think it's going to
stop anytime soon. Is it?" I asked him directly.
He sighed.
"They're all still over at my house, except for the ones that HAD
to go home, right? They're all there waiting to 'help' me some more..."
I shook my head, and started pulling my pants off. "That's the problem,
Mike; I can't THINK with all that going on. I needed to get the hell
outta there, someplace quiet, where I COULD think, and that was the last
thing any of them would let me do."
"I would've," Mike protested.
"That makes one of you. Dad, maybe two. Even Brian... That's
three. The rest of 'em would be on my ass ALL the time. Out there,
they can't find me, and I got time to think about it, and nothing to
distract me." Technically, Susan and/or Mom could find me, but I think
they knew better.
I looked around, and Mike handed me the black leotard I was looking
for. "The tits hurt when I go up and down," I sighed.
"S'what I guessed," he nodded.
"Mike, no more talk. We gotta go." It was building up inside me
again.
***
20:21 26 Sep
"Makeup?"
"Oh yeah." The old fashioned kind. He pulled out a compact from
his pack, and I stood still as he did me up all over, including all
around my neck and my ears, then it was his turn. *Dark on the vexes,
light in the caves,* I reminded myself as I smeared the oily stuff on
him with my fingers.
***
20:44 26 Sep
I finished tying a dograg over my head, hung another one off my
deuce gear, picked up the tiny ruck Mike had packed, and I was ready to
bug. "Up."
He fiddled with some stuff, shaking a bit, and stuffed some candy
bars into his ruck before he stood up and slipped it on his shoulders.
"Up," he finally agreed.
I checked over Mike, as he checked over me. I didn't see anything
wrong with his stuff, so I nodded at him. The last thing we did was
jump up and down, but aside from the noise of us hitting the ground, I
couldn't hear anything.
A set of headlights pulled too close to us, but by the time they
could have seen us, we'd faded, double-time, into the dark.
***
21:33 26 Sep
It was exceedingly dark, what with a mostly-waned moon and the
clouds closing in, and we weren't supposed to be in this area judging by
the fences they'd put up, but we were anyway.
I stopped Mike, and keyed my radio long enough to say, "Gear
check." I had to adjust my socks, which were not well adjusted, and I
was beginning to think that him bringing the PASGT helmets was a good
idea, since I was already getting tired of running into branches and
things with my head. Goggles were useful too, but we always carried
those.
***
23:16 26 Sep
I pulled out my compass and was glad to find it still glowing. Not
like there was much chance of it going out; tritium was pretty reliable.
The compass finally settled down, and I took a sighting, finding a
nice ridgepoint at about 190, which was just a tad west of where we were
supposed to go. If I kept all the deviations west, then when we got to
the right road, we'd know which way to go from there. Simple, really. I
signaled to Mike, and we started moving again.
***
01:09 27 Sep
"Tuck," Mike gasped. "What the hell..."
I had to clear my throat before I could talk, but I hawked loose
the dried stuff coating my windpipes and told him, "It's burning off."
"I'm burning out," he complained.
"Ssst!" I tapped his shoulder and motioned to move out again.
***
04:54 27 Sep
The fourth time Mike stumbled, which was just a few minutes after
the third time, I realized that we were going to have to find a laager
and lay up for the day. I tapped out, 'Stay here quiet I look laager.'
'O K,' Mike tapped back, slowly, and didn't bother to get up; he
just rolled himself into a more comfortable and less visible position.
***
05:33 27 Sep
I'd ended up rigging both hammocks myself, and half-carrying Mike
to the laager site too, but this place was pretty well overgrown, so it
wasn't very likely we'd be spotted.
I thought about eating something, but the idea made me sort of
sick, so I didn't; I just had some more Gatorade from the canteen I
hadn't emptied yet.
"Watches?" Mike croaked.
'I got it,' I told him over the radio, tapping very slowly, and
patted his leg, which was about the only thing I could reach. 'Sleep.'
"Hrgh," he agreed, and arranged himself in his hammock, which I'd
set up as a chair, and stopped moving. About thirty seconds later, his
breathing changed, telling me he was already asleep.
I would have said it was too quiet, but I'd been in the woods
before, and it wasn't quiet at all, with the insects and stuff, and the
wind blowing and rustling the trees. As we stayed still, the animal
noises increased, which told me we were safe for the moment.
The whirling in my head was still going, but really slow, and I
could tune it out by concentrating on hearing as far as I could.
***
09:23 27 Sep
*I knew this was going to happen,* I sighed to myself as it started
to rain. I bumped Mike a few times and pressed the Morse key for
several seconds.
"Uh?!"
'Rain' I tapped.
"Wh- Shit," he sighed.
***
09:28 27 Sep
We'd rigged our ponchos basically inside the hammocks, and Mike and
I had taken a latrine break, and then he went back to bed. The rain
wasn't bad where we were; I'd picked a spot that was leeward of the
wind, and that hadn't changed, so most of the rain hit our backs or
heads, where the ponchos covered us completely. Not by coincidence.
***
10:44 27 Sep
I'd spend a nice hour washing a tarp off in the rain, then started
using it as a giant funnel to collect rainwater into our canteens. It
was going to take a while to fill them all up, but we had the time, and
if I did it now, we wouldn't have to do it later on. If the rain lasted
long enough, of course; but I thought this counted as camping, which
meant it would probably rain the entire weekend.
Unless it snowed.
***
14:18 27 Sep
"Uh?"
I twisted around, and Mike looked like he was waking up, finally.
I slid myself out of my hammock and walked around to where we could see
each other easier. <Good morning,> I signed at him as I hunkered down.
<H,> he signed back, which I took for 'hello', and continued to
wipe his eyes and make chewing motions in his mouth.
When it looked like he'd finished, I started signing at him, <Rain
for weekend, says N.W.S. We can walk safe in rain.>
<I have to go,> he signed back.
I was going to be irritated until I realized it was a good idea.
***
14:21 27 Sep
As Mike stood up and readjusted his clothing, I used my parang to
fill in the cathole, then wiped the blade off, first on the side of my
boot and then with a dograg, and put it back in the sheath. <Get ready
to walk,> I signed when he was finished.
<Food,> he countered, which awoke some part of my deeper brain
which rose up and demanded FOOD NOW, so when we went back to the
hammocks, I got an MRE out of my ruck and slit it open. It didn't take
Mike long at all to find enough energy to do the same thing.
***
14:42 27 Sep
<Walk.>
"Bitch," Mike commented.
<No talking. Pack up and we walk.>
***
15:00 27 Sep
<Wait,> Mike signed as we were about to start. <Did you sleep?>
I sighed. <No. Head too...> I didn't know the signs for that
one, so I just looped a finger around my ear.
<Are you alright?>
I nodded. <Getting better,> I claimed. Maybe I was. Certainly, I
didn't feel any worse, even though maybe I should have, after not
sleeping for thirty hours.
<When you sleep?>
I shrugged. <When I need to, O-K.>
<Yes,> he agreed.
<But walk now.>
Again, I didn't know the signs for what Mike was communicating, but
him pulling at his hair in frustrated anguish told me enough.
***
17:29 27 Sep
"Ssst!" I turned back to see what Mike wanted, and heard a
click-whirr from my camera, that he was holding. He put the camera away
and gave me a thumbsup. I gave him a different sign, but he just
grinned.
***
21:03 27 Sep
I was starting to tire, so when I fell for the second time, this
time almost going base over apex, as Dad liked to call it, Mike called a
halt. We set up a tarp to hide the light and I brewed up some water for
tea. I thought we could use some more water, but that was just sort of
reflexive paranoia on my part; we still had a couple of liters each.
"Better?" Mike asked.
I sighed, and nodded.
"Feel like calling in? It's check-in time."
I sighed deeper.
***
21:09 27 Sep
"Status nominal," I reported, "confidence high. No traffic, over."
"Good luck, godspeed, and keep your powder dry," Dad said. "Out."
"Mom must not be around," I said, as I turned off the radio and
started pulling down the antenna we'd just set up. "She'd have said
something." Mike just shook his head. I thought about arguing with
him, but it wasn't worth it now, so I just sipped at my tea, and started
packing back up, just in case we had to leave suddenly.
'M R E X Q' Mike tapped on our radios, which took me a minute to
decipher.
'Y'.
He sighed in relief, and when he'd gotten the antenna wire rolled
up again, he put his tarp on the ground and pulled another MRE out of
his ruck. I didn't know why he was so hungry; he'd been stuffing his
face with Snickers bars every hour or so. I knew I wasn't; he'd given
me a couple or three, and I was getting sick of them, and of food
entirely.
***
21:26 27 Sep
'Up.'
"Nnnnnnn!" Mike protested, but I helped him up, and we started off
again. My legs were really starting to hurt.
***
03:19 28 Sep
<Close enough,> I signed. There were so many lights, it was
possible to communicate with sign rather than via Morse or voice. Well,
it sure seemed like a lot after the darkness we'd been in for the last
two nights. You could see the sky-glare for a couple of miles, if you
were paying attention and if your eyes were adapted, which I was and
mine were, respectively.
<You sleep?> Mike asked.
<Can you watch?> I asked back.
Pause.
<Too close to town,> I added. <One of us has to watch.>
***
07:11 28 Sep
Mike had fogged out before I did, so I made sure he was hidden, and
I stood watch, literally. My legs were in agony at this point, and
walking around was a bad idea, but I did it anyway, because it helped
minutely. I'd already had about as much of the normal painkillers as I
could take at one time, and I was playfully batting around the idea of
using something serious, like I had been thinking about idly for the
last few hours, when I saw a car drive up to the gas station.
It wasn't one of our cars; it looked like Kim's.
I ducked, then slowly crawled back to Mike, keeping half an eye on
the gas station. It helped, sometimes, if you didn't look directly at a
person; then they wouldn't feel like they were being watched.
***
07:16 28 Sep
I shook my head a bit, not sure if I was hallucinating or not. The
shaking didn't help things; Kim and Jill kept getting closer, and
calling our names. Loudly.
I signaled Mike for an open ambush.
***
07:17 28 Sep
Maybe it had been a mistake to come in on a small worn path; they
were coming along it themselves. On the other hand, we hadn't made the
worse mistake of actually standing around ON the path.
"Jill, this is stupid," Kim griped. "If they're here, they'll find
us or the car or something, and if not, we'll call in a while to find
out what the fuck. I'm going back-"
When she turned around, I poked her in the shoulder, which provoked
a scream the likes of which I'd never heard outside the movies, full
throated, way above high C, and with everything she had. It honestly
scared me. Jill flinched so violently I thought she was going to break
something, and when she whipped around, Kim ran over her in reverse.
They both fell over, almost on top of Mike, who just dodged a bit and
then fired the camera at them.
I dropped down to my hands and scuttled over and grabbed Kim's
mouth before she could scream again. She hit me a lot before something
Mike said made her stop. I was tempted to get in the last punch, but
restrained myself, somehow. I was trembling with the effort, though.
"Ladies," Mike announced, fairly loudly, "you are both dead."
"And PLEASE shut the fuck UP," I ordered.
Kim kicked me in the head, somehow, and I smacked her in a tit in
reflexive counterattack. That was a mistake, because she grunted and
then snarled at me as she grabbed for my hair, ran into my helmet, got a
grip on that, and tried to twist my head off as she slammed a knee into
my face. I got the impression she was really mad at that point.
"Keys! Igotkeys!" Mike yelled, and that seemed like a good excuse
to first disengage, which I managed with the help of some spit, and then
to run like hell towards their car.
The loud and angry yelling behind us suggested that we go faster.
Kim's car chirped at us as Mike unlocked the doors with the remote.
"I'm gonna kill you!" Jill snarled from behind me, and I almost
felt fingers in my harness.
"DIVE!" Mike screamed, and I dropped and rolled and complained as
Jill kicked the shit out of my ribs as she tripped over me. I kept
rolling until I got my feet somewhere towards the ground, powered up,
fell sideways, tried it again and made it this time, and sprinted
towards the car maybe two meters in front of Kim.
Mike flashed me with the camera, which didn't help at all.
"LOCK!" I yelled at him, and as he locked the doors with the
remote, I jumped on the trunk and then yanked myself backwards; Kim,
seeing me go up and expecting me to go over, was running around the back
and had to stop and back up. Mike unlocked the passenger door manually
and I threw myself in backwards, holding tightly to the door, and got it
closed and locked about eighty milliseconds before Jill grabbed the door
handle.
Panting pause, disturbed only by the shrieking heard dimly through
the soundproofing.
"I think they're upset about something," I breathed at Mike.
"Can't imagine what."
***
07:22 28 Sep
"You know," Mike said in an idle tone, almost ruined by the gasping
we were still doing, "this shows what..." Gasp, "...Teamwork can
accomplish." He took another picture, pressing the camera up against
the window so the flash wouldn't bounce, which make the girls even
madder.
"Yeah," I agreed.
***
07:25 28 Sep
After some negotiation, conducted through the windows on our side
with pen and paper, Mike and I spread a tarp over the front seat and
unlocked the rear doors, letting the girls sit in back and recover. And
bitch and moan and complain and yell... But what the hell, we were
getting out of here now; and it wasn't like they hadn't made plenty of
noise before now.
***
07:30 28 Sep
"IF I'D FUCKING WANTED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!" I screamed as loud as I
could, and then had to take another breath. "I'D HAVE STAYED AROUND TO
TALK ABOUT IT! I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT ANY MORE!"
That seemed to get the point across fairly well, finally, because
they shut up. Finally.
"My ear," Mike complained, faintly.
"Furthermore," I stated, trying for a commanding voice, "I have not
slept since Friday morning, it's been raining for a day on top of me, we
did twenty klicks or more, I am tired, I am irritable, and you were NOT
supposed to be the ones to pick us up this morning. I am NOT in the
mood for conversation!"
***
07:54 28 Sep
What had taken us a day and a half of hard travel on foot, had
taken us half an hour of driving, to go the long way around to get back
to Mike's car. I sighed a bit.
***
07:57 28 Sep
"They said it would be hot, but it wasn't that hot, not this early
in the morn-"
"Kim," I sighed, fighting the urge to strangle her, or kick her a
lot of times starting in the head. "'Hot' doesn't mean the weather;
'hot' means combat conditions. Didn't they TELL you what it meant?"
"He didn't say it like that!"
"What DID he tell you?"
"He said to just stay in the car, and-"
"Then why the fuck didn't you?!"
"Tuck," Mike warned. "Knock it off," he said, and pointed at his
car. I gave up and went to go sit in it. After a few seconds of that,
I gave up and started flicking one of my knives into the dashboard.
***
08:04 28 Sep
"Tuck, they are trying to help you," Mike said finally, after we'd
gotten moving steadily on the highway.
I sighed, "That's what's driving me so fucking crazy."
***
09:21 28 Sep
"Uh?"
"We're back," Mike repeated. I looked up, and it sort of looked
like my house, through the fog, but I couldn't be sure.
I tried rubbing my eyes, and that cleared up most of the fog, and
it was my house after all. "Oh good," I sighed.
***
09:23 28 Sep
"Welcome home!" Mom smiled as we came in through the back door. I
stood there while she hugged me for a long time, and then looked into my
eyes. "Feel better?"
"I think so, yeah," I agreed. I did... if you discounted how awful
I felt.
"Did you figure anything out?"
I thought about that for a while.
"Yeah, a little," I said eventually.
Pause.
"Mom, there's a lot to think about. But I'm okay. I mean, I'll
live with it, and I can manage, I mean I can handle it now, I think."
"Then we need to discuss some-"
"Yeah, I know. Just, not right now."
"Tuck," Mike said from somewhere.
"Ah, buzz off," I snapped weakly.
Mom gave me another hug and told me, "Then go wash off the camo,
and all that dir- NO, use the one in the basement," she ordered as I
started to go upstairs. "And CLEAN IT when you're both done, okay?"
"Yes Mom," Mike and I sighed.
***
10:10 28 Sep
The gear check was quick, because Mike had used the tiny rucks,
instead of the usual looming-above-your-head monster packs, and just
filled them with a few items we really needed. All we really had to
worry about was washing the clothes and harnesses clean, and then making
sure that everything would dry out okay, and then replacing the few
things we'd actually used, like minor painkillers and caffeine pills and
Esbit tabs and tea and stuff. We'd actually repack things when it all
dried out. Dad had locked us into the basement until we got done,
though, which wasn't especially my idea of fun; especially when Mike
kept kicking me when I stopped moving because I was going to sleep.
I really did feel better, though.
Well, sort of.
I guess mentally I felt better; physically, I felt like a wreck.
Mike kicked me again and ordered, "Call your dad for the inventory.
We're done."
"Oh, great," I sighed in relief, but he had to kick me again to get
me to actually do it.
***
10:12 28 Sep
"Breakfast?!" I gasped. Then I started to laugh. "Sure, whyinhell
not? Sure thing! Ahahahah!"
Susan frowned in concern at me. "I think I'd better go with you."
"Lovely!" I cackled. "FanTASTic!"
Mike slapped me lightly several times, which calmed me down a lot.
***
10:20 28 Sep
"No, I'm driving," Susan insisted as we walked out to the driveway.
"You two are too screwed up to drive." I was going to tell her off, but
I couldn't think of anything the right kind of nasty to call her, which
I guess proved her point. Mike wasn't too happy about it either, but he
didn't say anything either.
"Okay," I agreed finally, "but then you can tell us why THOSE two
were there when we got done, and not you or Dad or someone."
"That'd be nice to know," Mike agreed. "Oh, and we need to stop at
a photo place."
***
10:23 28 Sep
"Okay!" Susan yelled at us, as she pulled into line formation with
Kim's car. "You really scared everyone again, like you did in- Well,
you scared all your girl friends, anyway, and that included Kim, Mike.
I tried telling 'em that you weren't gonna get in trouble with Mike
around- not like April, anyway," she corrected. "God knows you two
juvenile delinquents get-"
"Get on with it!" we both yelled at her.
Susan sighed deeply, and drove silently for a while, while I fought
the urge to pound the top of her head to get her to talk.
"Anyway," she finally let out, "Dad told me to go pick you two
up... but Kim and Jill were like the most upset, and Kathy was the only
one that seemed to be listening, and so-"
"Kathy?"
"When I told her that you," she pointed at Mike, "wouldn't let
him," she jerked a thumb back at me, "get fucked up, she nodded like it
made sense, and then she started trying to calm everyone else down too."
She shrugged as she stopped for a red light, still behind Kim. "Didn't
work worth shit. So, when I said I was going to pick you guys up, they
were almost throwing themselves on my car they were so worried, and then
I figured, 'What the hell, let THEM see why it's a bad idea to try
interacting with Tuck when he gets like this.'"
"Thanks, Suze," I said, not at all sincerely.
"Besides, I got to sleep in," she added. "Speaking of which!" she
snapped angrily. "Why in HELL did you wedge my bedroom door shut?!"
***
10:47 28 Sep
"I actually got some sleep," Mike explained to the breakfast group,
while I kept playing with the coffee to make it drinkable. "Tuh-Val
didn't have any, I don't think."
"Nope!" I agreed. Watching Brownian motion with cream and coffee
was really cool.
"Why?" Kim finally asked. Well, she might have asked it before,
but that's what she asked me after she kicked me.
"Uh? Why no sleep?"
"Why," she started twitching her head side to side, "why any of it?
What happened to you this weekend?"
I shrugged. "I needed to get away, and to think about things. I
can't think when ev'rybody's talkin' at me."
"And the no sleep part?" Jill asked.
"Hard to sleep when I'm thinkin' that hard," I said.
"Also," Mike added, "Tuck gets really wired up, in a really strange
way sometimes, and then it's like he's got hyperactive... uh, that
hyperactive thing, what is it?"
"Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder?" Susan popped off,
demonstrating that she'd had some real psych classes, or something.
"Yeah," Mike nodded, "except, no attention deficit, really; he just
loses what he's got already. Has problems talking, stuff like that."
"My head gets full and I can't think straight," I explained.
"Moving helps burn the energy off, drain it."
"I told Mom we should get him a giant hamster wheel," Susan said.
"How far was it?" Kelly asked.
I blinked, then rubbed my eyes, but she was still there, as Mike
answered, "'Bout fifteen miles, I think. Not so far, except it was all
up and down. We tried to stay on the ridgelines, though, or close to
'em, so we wouldn't have to..." Kelly blurred some, and I was happy for
a second because I thought she was going to evaporate, but Susan elbowed
me and Kelly rezzed back up.
***
10:51 28 Sep
"We were just trying to help," Kim whined.
"Yeah, b- Ow! Fuck!" I complained at Mike as I tried to kick him
back.
"He gets really anti-social when he's like that," Mike explained as
he twisted himself into a pretzel to avoid my feet. "Kind of like now,
actually," he chuckled.
As I stood up, I mentioned, "You haven't fucking seen-" but stopped
when Susan grabbed me by the back of my belt and hauled me back down
unexpectedly.
"Anti-social," she commented as she let go, and gave me a warning
glance like Mom would've.
"Anyway," Mike went on, "since he asked you to stop and you didn't,
he needed to-"
"You have a habit of avoiding things, if you haven't noticed?" Kim
hissed at me.
"Who, Tuck?" Susan gaped in mock surprise, then elbowed me back.
"If he asks you to leave a topic alone, he means it," Mike stated
as Susan and I debated for a bit until she got me in a thumb lock.
As I thought I'd need that thumb later, I conceded by slapping my
hand on the table and Susan let go, as Kim snarled at Mike, "So how come
you get to talk to her, and the rest of us are just supposed to shut up
and let her fuck herself over?"
"'Cause I have a piece of Tuck's soul," Mike said, and forked some
pancakes into his mouth.
Even Susan didn't care to make a smart remark about that statement.
***
12:04 28 Sep
Dad handed me my school pack and laptop, still handcuffed together,
and I managed to get it up on a shoulder without braining myself or
falling over, as he complained, "What, no Sunday dinner?"
"Uhhhh!" I groaned at him.
"Tuck cooked Friday, that should count instead. If he tries
cooking now, he's going to fall into the food and cook his face," Mike
translated.
"Bill, let him go to bed," Mom ordered.
"Go to bed," Dad echoed.
I agreed, "Behhhd."
***
18:52 28 Sep
"Eugene?" *She must've heard me flush the toilet, damnit. I
shoulda stayed in the woods. Or at least pissed out the window.*
I staggered back up and to the door, spent a while trying to figure
out how to open it, and then did so, finding - surprise - Mom on the
other side. "Yesh?"
"Come down, have supper, and then go back to bed," she demanded
quietly. "Otherwise you'll wake up at two in the morning and mess up
your sleeping."
"Oh, bad," I agreed, and shut the door and went to find something
to wear to the table.
***
19:02 28 Sep
The house seemed strangely empty and quiet, even though everyone
who lived here was eating at the table. "Where's Susan?" I finally
asked.
"Classes Monday; she had to go back and study," Dad answered.
"Speaking of which..." he frowned.
"I got all my homework done," I lied. "Babysitting Friday,
remember? Plenty of time there." Mom's eyebrows shot up, and I thought
she was going to call me a liar, but she didn't. I could get the rest
of it done Monday during classes anyway; that was why they made them so
boring, after all.
***
20:09 28 Sep
Moving was sheer torture, even with more ibus in me, but I'd had to
repack both my gear and Mike's, and then I had to do my chores, or pay
Brian which I'd rather not this week. The fines Dad had hit us with
Wednesday would hurt, and even more so since the money went to Dad, but
they'd hurt Brian more than me, especially since I had an outside job.
"V-Tucker?"
I looked up, and it was Sabrina. "Hey," I sighed wearily.
"What happened to you during the weekend?"
"I was getting kinda stifled by all the attention, and all the
demands that I think and discuss," I said carefully, "and I kept telling
them to stop but they just kept on asking me questions and discussing
the answers like it was some kind of English-lit assignment and they had
to get it figured out before the test. So I took a vacation to think
about things without anyone bothering me. Kind of like I did last
April, except this time I took Mike."
"We got kind of worried about you in April, remember?" she said
pointedly.
"That's why I took Mike, this time," I said.
"Oh, but," she said, then she stopped. Then she said, "Did you
figure anything out?"
"Life goes on," I shrugged, and went back to mopping.
"That it does," Dad agreed from somewhere.
***
22:39 28 Sep
Life was not going to go on much longer if I didn't get some more
sleep. Or less nightmares. Especially ones about some kids at school
hearing about my problems and deciding to fix them once and for all,
with kitchen equipment out of the cafeteria and no anesthetic.
***
01:04 29 Sep
"What do you mean I have to take gym with the girls?" I asked, but
the new principal threatened me until I had to shut up and then it was
gym class and I had to go into the locker room and then they were all
waiting for me and-
***
01:09 29 Sep
"I don't need sleep that much," I told myself. "Sleep is some sort
of artifact from the times we didn't have artificial lighting; there's
no reason not to be awake twenty-four hours a day now." It felt like
there was still some vomit on me, so I rubbed my face in the shower
spray some more.
***
06:55 29 Sep
I was glad we had dogrags in the car kits; I needed one, or
something, to keep warm out in the parking lot. I was freezing, and the
temperature wasn't that low either. Bad sign. I wished I'd brought a
sweatshirt or something.
"Did you get ANY sleep?" Kim accused me.
"Kim, would you leave h-h-him alone?" Jill stuttered angrily. "I
don't think he tried to stay up late last night!" I shook my head in
agreement. "More nightmares, right?" she confirmed, and I nodded. "How
much sleep did you get?"
"Uh... maybe four hours," I guessed. "Something like that. I'll
be okay, though." I thought of a diversion, and asked, "What sked is
today, anyway?"
***
07:58 29 Sep
The first thing Mike asked when he saw me was, "How much did you
sleep last night?"
"Four hours," I sighed.
"Tuck, you're gonna kill yourself," Mike warned.
"It's not me!" I protested. "It's THEM!"
"Which ones, your friends or-"
"No, the other Them. My friends are just trying to drive me
insane. Good MORNING," I said forcefully to George and Dan.
"Tuck," George said, "no one can drive YOU insane, you're already
there." Dan laughed.
I pointed them out to Mike as an example of what I'd just said.
"At least he's not trying to discuss things," Mike mentioned.
***
08:37 29 Sep
I'd felt like Study Hall was going to be the worst of all classes
today, because of me needing to stay awake. Then I remembered that I
still had a few items of homework due today, and the minutes started
zipping past.
***
10:44 29 Sep
"Tuck?" Mike asked as I sat down.
"Uh?"
"You are excused from playing today, but come over anyway."
I sighed and shook my head. "I've still got homework to do."
"Oh man," he sighed.
"You look like hell!" Amanda commented, I wasn't sure to whom.
"Don't you start," I warned, which got me a very confused look.
"You have any Dew?" Mike asked me.
"Twelve-pack." Dad had been most thoughtful, for once.
"Sheesh. Can I have a couple at lunch?"
"If I have any left," I grinned.
***
13:13 29 Sep
It took me a little too long to process the, "Faggot!" and so I
wasn't really expecting it when the hand shoved me over. I sort of went
all over the place, with both bags falling off my shoulder and hitting
the ground, and then I couldn't get up at first because several people
kicked me as they walked past.
I came up in a rage, but I wasn't sure who was to blame, and while
several people were laughing, none of them had the voice I'd just heard.
I just gave up and went to physics class.
***
14:00 29 Sep
"I can not WAIT to get the hell outta here," I said to myself as
the bell rang and we started packing up. The nice thing about labs
was, you could bring in sodas and stuff and if you were discreet, Mr.
Mattson would let you get away with it. So I was almost awake; and the
ibus I'd snuck in and swallowed helped too. Codeine would've been nice,
though, but I wasn't going to be picky since I was leaving.
***
14:28 29 Sep
"Amazing!" I had hardly any cuts, scratches, extra bruises - most
of the ones I had already were already in beautiful Technicolor and
healing - or anything to show that I'd been camping. "I gotta thank
Mike again for those pads. And the helmets, this time." Incredible
weight, incredible protection.
I almost started putting on my school clothes again before I
remembered what I had to go to next. "Shhhhh," I hissed in irritation.
I could really stand to go to bed - well, I could lie - but there was no
rest for the weary at the Parkers' house.
***
15:19 29 Sep
"What'ya doin'?" Ricky asked as he came back in, apparently looking
for seconds on the after-school snack.
"I have got to repack all this stuff," I told him absently.
"Why?"
"The laptop case is throwing me off balance," I said. "And I had
an idea. Wanna go shopping?"
"No!"
"You sure?" I grinned at him, and he frowned.
Pause.
"Where?" he asked finally, unable to restrain himself any more, and
I grinned some more, maybe even wider.
***
15:48 29 Sep
"I'm not buying anything for you!" I told Ricky, but he was already
in the shop, I think. Or he'd boiled already from anticipation and
evaporated. "Wonder what his heat of vaporization is, huh?" I asked
Stella as we made our slow and civilized way through the parking lot.
"Ya rug foo," she answered. I think.
"Well, don't you think that's a little high?"
"No!" And she laughed.
***
16:11 29 Sep
"I told you, I am not buying you anything," I repeated to Ricky. I
hadn't found anything like the ammo box I had in mind, so I was going to
have to come up with something else. Or buy one or another of the kinds
they did have, then cut them up into pieces the right size(s) and
re-weld them, which I thought was sort of impractical.
"When did you say that?" he challenged.
"When we were in the parking lot."
"I didn't-"
"I TOLD you to stay with me, and if you had, you'd have heard it,"
I told him.
"Why not?"
"Because you don't really need anything from-"
"But it's so cool!" he whimpered, looking around frantically. I
had to admit, a surplus shop was sort of like your grandfather's
basement and a weird toy store rolled into one, but since this was MY
money we were talking about, I was not feeling generous.
"So get your mom or dad to take you here some time," I suggested.
"You think they'd do that?"
I didn't know, but I wasn't going to say that. Instead, I said, "I
think you've got a lot better shot of getting them to come in here and
buy something for you, than you do with me."
***
16:43 29 Sep
"Wood, duh," Mike said, like he was annoyed that I hadn't thought
of it myself.
"Wood?" I repeated. "Isn't-"
"Nothing you can carry on you is going to be impervious to attack,"
he reminded me, "not if you want to carry it. So, make it out of good
wood, heavy nails, caulk the whole thing, and-" #beep#
"That's a great idea, hold on, 'nother call," I said rapidly as I
went over to the phone base and flashed the hook. "Hello?"
"Valerie, where have you been?!" Travis demanded.
"Ahh! Ah erk, uh, hold on-" -flash- "Mike it's Travis onna other
line I haven't talked in days gotta go!"-flash-"Travis!! Oh m-"
"Valerie?!"
He sounded peeved. I asked, nervously, "Yeah?"
Travis paused for a second or three, then asked, "Are you okay?"
"Yeah... Yeah, it's just been hectic the last week," I told him.
"I'm sorry about not calling and stuff... I just..."
***
16:47 29 Sep
"Miz Parker? It's Val, I just wanted to ask if I could leave a
little early? It's, uh, I haven't seen Travis in a week, and-"
"A week?" she interrupted. "How did you stand it?"
"I don't know!" I moaned.
"Well, leaving early isn't a problem," she said. "About six-thirty
or so?"
The relief wave felt SO good. "Yeah, thanks SO much-"
"Can we get pizza?" Ricky asked from around my knees.
"Pickled rats for you!" I snapped at him.
"What?!" gasped a startled Miz Parker.
***
17:04 29 Sep
I realized, a bit belatedly but not too late, that I'd better call
Mike or someone to tell them that I was going on an unexpected date
tonight; I didn't want all of them to panic like they did back in April.
One thing that I was sure of; if enough of them got a little worried,
and started talking to each other, then they'd all amp each other up
into a major frenzy.
"'Lo?"
"Hey Mike, s'me."
"Sup?"
"Travis called- You heard that," I remembered.
He guessed, "You going out with him tonight?"
***
17:45 29 Sep
"You ARE all right, though, aren't you?" Miz Parker asked me.
"Yeah... Just tired," I said.
"You seem tired all the time," she remarked.
I shrugged. "Busy life, I guess." And yawned.
"Maybe you should go home and go to bed early, instead of going
out tonight."
"Oh no," I shook my head. "I was so busy since, uh, like Tuesday,
I haven't called him at ALL, or called back for his pages, or anything.
So, I mean..."
"Why?"
"I just got distracted, with the medical stuff and everything," I
told her. "Plus catching up on the homework and stuff I missed, when I
was out of class last week. There was a lot."
***
18:22 29 Sep
"Hey," rumbled a voice from the doorway, startling me.
"Ah- Travis!" I yelped, then sped over to kiss him hello and to
start apologizing.
***
18:30 29 Sep
Not only could I fall asleep in his warm strong arms, I had. While
standing up. The bass rumble in his shirt didn't bother me, but him
moving did, and I woke up with a start.
"Are you hungry?" he asked down at me.
"Uh... yeah," I said, as my stomach twisted angrily. *Guess he
missed me sleeping, or he'd have suggested I go home. To MY place. Or,
maybe he missed me too...* He had seemed somewhat upset on the phone.
"God, I missed you," I sighed.
***
18:33 29 Sep
We had just made our way out to his truck when someone turned the
corner down the block. "Oh, SHIT," I growled.
"What?" Travis asked, as I tried to make Kim's car explode via
pyrokinesis.
Apparently I didn't have that talent either; she pulled up across
the street and came out of her seat waving, not burning.
"Kim," I warned, and she stopped. "What are you doing?"
"I just wanted to see if you were okay?" she claimed.
"I'm fine. I'm going on a date. I'll see you tomorrow," I told
her, and turned around and got in the truck and locked the door.
"What's going on?" Travis asked.
"Just go! Please," I added. "I don't want to talk to her right
now."
"Okay," he agreed, and started the truck. I guess I could have
looked back, but I didn't.
***
18:40 29 Sep
"I DON'T want to talk about it!" I insisted. "Look, can we just go
get something to eat, and you can tell me what you did this weekend? Or
we could go dancing, or... or play golf, or something..."
"I'm worried about you-"
"STOP worrying!" I accidentally shrieked. "No, wait," I pleaded,
putting my hand on his as I looked at him. "Look... I'm just stressed
out, okay? And, Kim, and the rest of them, they're like worried about
me, which is okay I guess except they won't STOP, and what I need most
is to get my mind OFF what's, uh, what they want to talk about." I'd
just escaped saying 'what's wrong', and that would have made Travis
start acting like them. "Travis," I said softly, trying to sound calm
and rational and nice, "I just want to be with you tonight, and enjoy
some closeness and stuff. Okay? That would make me feel best of all.
I missed you."
He sighed, very deeply indeed, then said, "Okay, I guess. I wish
you'd let me help with whatever it is, though."
"Travis, nothing's really wrong. They just all think that I'm
upset, and I'm not, not really. But they keep insisting that I am, and
they're not listening to me... which makes me upset... which makes them
say, 'See? You ARE upset! So talk about it,' and around and around..."
I discovered I was trying to strangle one of them remotely, which I knew
wouldn't work, so I sat on my hands.
He sighed again, and my heart sank.
"Just dinner?" he asked finally.
"Anything you want," I smiled gratefully.
***
19:11 29 Sep
Wendy's wouldn't have been my first choice, but it did have the
advantage that I didn't have to sit upright to get the food. It had the
disadvantage that Travis wanted me to climb the stairs to his place
before he would let me eat it, though. Somehow I managed, though things
were getting a little spotty by the time I finished the climb.
"So what happened?" he asked as we sat down on the couch. Well, I
sort of fell, but I made it look intentional, I thought.
"What?"
"What happened, that got all your friends worried?"
"Nothing, really," I lied with a smile. He didn't seem like he
thought that was enough, so I thought about it a minute as I unpacked
the food, and finally came up with, "They discovered I've got some kind
of thing in my abdomen, that's not supposed to be there. So I may have
to get surgery one of these days to fix it. I'm okay," I told him
truthfully.
***
19:43 29 Sep
"Mmmm mmm," someone said, and started to move me out of my warm
spot.
"Hey!" I protested, and hit them.
"Come on, Val, you need to go home," Travis said as he picked me up
off the couch.
"Why?! I was nice and warm there!" He laughed, which didn't make
me pleased. "Whasso damn funny? Put me down, damnit!"
"Val," he sighed.
"Don't 'Val' me! What are you doing? Ah!" I mentioned as he swung
me over his head like a broadsword, I thought, and somehow managed to
guide me to a relatively soft landing on my feet. "Ahhhh," I whined.
"Val, you were snoring, you're so-"
"I was not!"
"Yes, you were," he insisted. "You need to go home and get some
sleep, and I can see you tomorrow."
I was about to kick him when he said, 'Tomorrow'. "You promise?" I
demanded.
"Promise, Val," he smiled.
"Kiss me?" I asked, hoping-
He did.
***
20:12 29 Sep
As I drove off, I almost blanked again, and I knew this was going
to require extreme measures, if I wanted to make it home.
***
20:25 29 Sep
"Hush my
darrrrr-lin',
don't you cry.
Guard'yan, annnnngel
won't let you die," I sang along with Belinda, both of us cranked
up as loud as we could get without distortion.
"Can you hear them?
They talk about us
telling lies.
Well, that's no surprise. Can you see them?
See right through them.
They have a shield, nothing gets thruuuuu the field.
Doesn't matter what they say
in the jealous games people play, hey-hey-hey!
Our lips are sealed..."
As the light turned green, and I managed to coordinate diverse
parts of my body to make the car go forward, the airflow through the
windows picked up again, and the cooler air helped wake me up a little
more. Max-volume Go-gos and cold air would wake up just about anybody.
***
Stress is the mental anguish casued by your mind overriding your body's
natural instinct to choke the living shit out of some asshole who
desperately needs it.
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+ ==[-------- Ellen Hayes @>--,--'--- ellen@barkingduck.net +
PGP DH/DSS keyfing: 33D4 156A AE39 53E2 0313 6714 2878 56A8 61B0 9CDC
+ http://www.barkingduck.net/ehayes -=[1990]=- vicki .sig virus 11.4 +
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