Date: Thu, 04 Nov 2004 16:17:56 +0000
From: Rob H <robz8000@hotmail.com>
Subject: Sarah's Story 4

Sarah's Story (c)
By
Rob Henson


Chapter 6 -- Sarah and Kent

It was Friday two weeks after the conference and Sarah was having a quite
afternoon in the office.  The visit plans for the next week was complete
and most of the timesheets for the previous week had been returned although
there were always a few that were missing, usually from the same people.
Sarah would have to have a word with them, there was no reason to be as
late as some always seem to be, after all the other carers managed to get
theirs in on time. She was just thinking about what to do when Andy walked
in.

"Hello, I didn't think you were coming back today," said Sarah surprised to
see him.

"I wasn't but the meeting finished early and the weekend away was
cancelled.  Diane had to go up to York with her Mother. Looks like her
grandmother might be dying." Andy looked dejected, more at missing the
weekend with Diane probably than concern about her grandmother.

"I'm sorry," said Sarah wishing she could give him a cuddle.

"No matter, usual meeting then?" he asked a bit more brightly, "give me a
few minutes to make some coffee and then come in."

"OK", said Sarah tidying away the notes she had been working on. They
always met on Friday afternoons, assuming Andy was in the office, to review
the past week and look for any potential problems that might surface during
the following week.

She finished tidying her desk, picked up her note pad and went in to Andy's
office but he was on the telephone. He waved her in and she sat down in
front of his desk. She was wearing a short black, long sleeve dress, sheer
black tights and black high heels which gave her a very professional look,
one she had copied from Clair. As she crossed her legs showing far too much
thigh she was grateful there was a barrier between them. She wondered what
Andy would think if he could see her from behind the large oak desk. What
if she moved her chair around to the side of the desk so that he could see
her long shapely legs better. She wondered what he would do.  Would he be
able to keep his eyes from straying up and down her long, black-nyloned,
sensual calves watching her as she moved thinking that she hadn't noticed
as she wrote out the orders for next week. She would make an attempt at
pulling the dress down but that would just show even more of her
thighs. Would he like that...?

The phone snapped onto its cradle and she was back in the room with a jolt.
Things had gotten a little uncomfortable between her legs so she crossed
them the other way.

"Sorry about that," said Andy.

"Oh.. that's alright... So how did the meeting go this morning?" said Sarah
flustered and pulling down her hem. Andy had been with Northampton Social
Services following up a lead from the recent conference.

"Great, they are really keen and have been talking unofficially to
Cambridge who gave us a fantastic reference. They said they were looking to
renew contracts after Christmas and would be sending tender requests out
next week. They also said that they would be keen for us to respond. I'll
probably need some help putting it together; they normally arrive late and
have to go back in a rush."

"Yes of course. Did you see Phil while you were there," she asked
nonchalantly pretending to write something in her pad.

"Yes, he spoke highly of you. He said he was impressed with the way you
handled things when he cane to the stand. Are you OK?"

Sarah suddenly went quite and very pale.

"Yes fine," said Sarah. She had really enjoyed the evening with Phil and
waited for him to call after they had both returned home but he never
did. Discussing it with Andy had reminded her that nothing had come of it
when she was rather hoping it might. He was the first boy she had been with
who had not know that she was basically Simon underneath her sexy
underwear.  She hadn't a clue what would have happened had he found out
about her secret indeed the idea had not even raised its awkward head. She
had simply been flattered that he was attracted to her even though they
were both a little drunk, especially when they were kissing outside her
room and she felt how hard he was, pushing up against her thigh. Her
confidence had grown at the same rate as his cock.

"You were getting on quite well together I seem to remember," said Andy
smiling, "I just caught sight of the two of you going off together when I
got dragged back to the bar. I assumed... There isn't a problem is there?"
He realised he was beginning to go too far.

"No, no problem. We just said goodnight and went to bed. I was shattered.
Went off as soon as my head hit the pillow." She didn't sound very
convincing. Sarah was still looking at her pad feeling miserable.

"Good. By the way, you don't fancy going down to London with me tomorrow do
you. I've got a spare theatre ticket could do with cheering up?"

"No sorry, I promised Mum we would go shopping together in the afternoon
and then we are going out for the evening with my Aunt who's staying over."

She felt even more depressed now at having to pass up the opportunity of
meeting Andy outside of work.

"Another time perhaps," said Andy, "Now, anything looming next week I
should know about."

She pulled into what must have been the last space in the car park. She was
in a hurry and had just completed three laps of the busy multi-storey
before spotting someone pulling out of a space. It was Saturday afternoon
and she was meeting Clair for lunch before they hit the shops for some
serious therapy. It was mid summer but not as hot as it should have been so
her dress was longer than the mini skirts she usually loved to wear which
would show off her long slender legs to perfection. She grabbed her handbag
opening the door at the same time not noticing that the man standing by the
next car was about to unlock his door to leave.

"Careful darling," he called, "I'm too young to die." Sarah turned quickly
and saw what was about to happen.

"Oh I'm terribly sorry, did I catch you?"

"No damage done this time. That's a nice little run around, this year's
model isn't it? I'm Kent by the way," said the man.

"Sarah. Yes my dad bought it for me for passing my exams." She looked at
him and he held her stare. She was mesmerised. He was very good looking,
just over six foot with thick blonde curly hair, clean shaven and wearing a
black leather jacket and jeans. His face was something to die for, thin but
not shallow and well tanned with the most gorgeous, deep blue eyes.

"He must be doing well then to buy his little girl a nice new car," but she
hardly heard him. "Is there something wrong?"

"Sorry, er no nothing, yes it was good of him," she finally shook herself
free of his gorgeous image.

"I used to have one of those a while ago but I prefer the sports jobs now,
bit more excitement."

She looked down at the powder blue, soft top sports car, a BMW Z3, and
suddenly pictured herself in the passenger seat next to Kent, her hair
flowing in the wind. Kent noticed she had gone off the air again but could
see she was interested.

"It runs really well, fancy a spin and see how it goes?"

"No, sorry I can't, I'm meeting my Mum I'm afraid."

"I didn't mean now, I'm busy myself. How about tomorrow? We could have a
drive to a pub I know out towards Newmarket. We could open her a bit if you
like, it should be quite on Sunday."

"That sounds nice," Sarah heard herself saying still dazed.

"Tell you what, Well meet right here at midday and you can leave you car.
I'll drop you back afterwards. OK?"

"Yes that would be good, see you at twelve."

He smiled, put on his sunglasses and quickly got into the BMW, pulled back
and with a wave was gone. Wow, thought Sarah, what a dish and once again
she pictured herself in the car hammering through the roads of
Cambridgeshire.

"There you are, is everything alright?" asked Clair. She was always
concerned about Sarah even though nothing had ever happened to cause a
problem, as far as she was aware anyway. Clair was waiting outside the
restaurant where they had agreed to meet. She had had to go into the office
that morning on an urgent case that was coming to court the following week.

Clair had helped her all she could with make-up, her voice and walking,
often going out together to give Sarah confidence. She had no idea whether
Sarah would see the year out as they had agreed or revert back to Simon
sooner but it did seem like week by week Sarah became little stronger and
Simon was slipping away from them. It was not a problem though and, if she
was being honest with herself it was nice to have a daughter to share those
experiences with that Richard simply didn't understand, especially
shopping.

"You look nice," said Clair, "I like that dress."

Sarah had enjoyed getting ready that morning and had taken her time. A long
soak in the bath first and then plenty of perfumed talc. Then tidy her hair
which was a simple cut and apply her make-up.  Once again, light but
effective. Her skin was smooth and milky with hardly a blemish which was
set of nicely by the green eye shadow and pink rouge on the cheeks. Today
she had also chosen a pale pink lipstick. When she had finished she checked
in the mirror and was pleased with the result. It was then time to get
dressed.

She wore a green matching underwear set which had been padded by Clair in
the way all her bras had and her panties were fairly tight which although
slightly uncomfortable when her cock was tucked out of the way, gave her a
nice feminine shape. She pulled on fresh pair of extremely fine tights
which felt amazing on her smooth talced legs. They were a light brown and
showed her red varnished toes off to perfection and they looked very sexy
in the white sandals she had decided to wear. Although she had also chosen
a flowered pattern summer dress in was a thicker than just cotton and lined
and so quite warm in the chill air but not so heavy that she would be too
hot. She checked in the mirror and felt good. A nice looking young
lady. She smiled at herself and got ready to leave.

"How was work, all done?" asked Sarah.

"Yes, no problem, just one of the junior barristers getting in a panic but
we sorted him out."

They had lunch and then spent a delightful afternoon ambling around the
shops of central Cambridge buying the odd outfit that caught their eye plus
extras that were always required like underwear and tights and, more
recently for Sarah, stockings.

On Sunday Sarah met Kent as agreed at the multi story car park in the
centre of town. He was leaning on the bonnet of the Z3 talking to someone
on his mobile phone. It looked like he was arguing with who was at the
other end. When he caught site of her he finished the call and smiled.

"Well hello gorgeous, how are you today? Ready for some excitement?" Sarah
blushed, "Come on then let's go."

They climbed into the car and he pulled out of the car park heading off
eastwards out of town. They chatted casually as he pushed on the
accelerator and was soon speeding along the dual carriage way at over
ninety miles an hour. Sarah hair was blowing wildly in the wind but it was
so exhilarating.  When they finally pulled up at the pub just off the main
road she was breathless.

"So what do think," asked Kent, "like it?"

"Fantastic, its so fast."

"Come on lets get a drink and we can sit in the garden," Kent headed into
the pub and Sarah followed.

Kent noticed the heads turn as they walked through the bar. Sarah was
wearing a very short corduroy skirt and a pink brushed wool jumper. Her
tights were a dark shade of brown with ankle boots. Kent had looked down at
her legs when they were driving but she hadn't noticed. He liked what he
saw.

They took their drinks into the garden and sat in the sun chatting about
the car and Kent's job. He worked for himself delivering expensive cars all
around Europe. He was currently working for a main dealer in Cambridge on a
short term contract and had moved over from Birmingham where he was
normally based. He had bought the BMW cheap when a customer pulled out and
had to make a fast sale before moving abroad. Sarah was impressed. He said
he also did the odd bit of private work but didn't go into any details.

They arrived back at the car park a couple of hours later and Kent got out
to hold the door of Sarah's car open. Everything seemed to go quite for a
moment as they stood there and Kent leaned forward and took her shoulders
in the strong arms. She lowered her eyes for a second and then they kissed,
long and passionately.

"Like that?"

Sarah lowered her eyes.

"Yes," she said softly.

"We can do it again if you like, you can have a drive next time if you
like."

She suddenly realised he was talking about the car and blushed at her
mistake.

They agreed to meet again the following Wednesday in town. Kent was late
and Sarah waited for over half am hour before she saw him turn the corner
talking on his mobile as he had when they met the previous Sunday. He put
the phone away and kissed her on the cheek. She was annoyed that he never
apologised but held his arm as they walked off to the local burger
house. He said that he only had time for a quick meal and had to go off
early to attend to some business. It sounded mysterious but chatting about
the day over the meal soon moved her mind onto other matters. He never
called again for over a week after that but suddenly rang and asked if she
wanted to go with him to a meeting in Peterborough the following Saturday
afternoon. They arranged to meet in the car park as they had done the first
time they had gone out together. Sarah was busy that morning seeing a
relative so meeting there was ideal for her.

He had been abroad delivering a new jaguar and one or two other things as
well but didn't go into details. They sped off once again and she enjoyed
every moment of the ride.  The sun was hot and once again she had worn a
short skirt showing off her long legs. Kent met someone at a house on the
outskirts of town while Sarah remained in the car. She saw the man hand
over some money to Kent but he never ventured an explanation and she never
asked. She wondered if it was the man Kent talked to on the mobile.

They flew back to Cambridge breaking at least three traffic laws at any one
point in time arriving back at the car park during the early evening. The
multi story was quite on the upper decks where they had parked and the got
out of the sports car. Kent said he had to go out again and so couldn't be
with her for the evening. Sarah was disappointed but he came and stood
close to her and held her shoulders. Her legs weakened and she
relented. She leaned forward and kissed him and he took her in his arms the
way she loved. They kissed for a long time their tongues exploring each
other viciously. Kent lifted her onto the bonnet of her car and placed both
hands on her knees and began to slide them under her dress over her smooth
silky tights. She looked around but the car park was deserted. Oh how she
wanted him inside her but that must not happen. Not yet. He must know about
her first. She gripped his wrist and slid off the car causing her skirt to
slip right to the top of her long legs.

"I've got to go, when shall I see you again?" she asked embarrassed at
showing her panties.

Kent smiled.

"Not sure, I will be going away again. I'll let you know when I get back.
Maybe you could come with me sometime?"

"Er.. yes Ok, maybe." Sarah's mind was reeling at the offer and how she
might swing it. There were too many hurdles in the way at the moment
though. She would have to take her time but could she keep Kent at bay
without him losing interest in her. She was sure he must have lots of the
girlfriends.

"See you then," he turned and was gone.

He disappeared again for over a week but called as soon as he returned.

"Hi ya doll, how's it going ?"

He was infuriating at times, just turning up as if nothing was wrong. She
was pleased to hear his voice again though.

"Hello, I thought you might have called."

"Couldn't, I was in Spain and the phone coverage is not brilliant, it was a
bit of a backwater. Still home again and can't wait to get my hands around
that lovely body."

He annoyance subsided as she took in the his words and her body tingled all
over at the thought of his hands caressing her.

"Listen, I am taking a day or two off fancy doing something?"

Sarah thought for a moment. Andy had mentioned that she could take some
time out in lieu of her time at the conference but there had been too much
to do once they got back.

"I could be free for an afternoon but we're very busy at the moment," she
said wondering what Kent might suggest.

"How about we have a drive over to Norfolk. We could find a nice spot on
one of the broads for the day?"

"That sounds nice we could have a picnic if you like, but I could only
manage an afternoon" said Sarah.

"and you can have a drive of the Z3."

That clinched it. The weather was forecast to be hot until the end of the
week together with the thought of driving the BMW and being with Kent for
the afternoon in the sun by a lake was more than enough to tip the balance.

"That sounds really nice, I could be free on Tuesday. How about I get some
food and a bottle of wine at lunch time and then meet you?"

"OK, what time and where?" asked Kent.

"Well," said Sarah thinking quickly, "I will need about half an hour after
I finish. One o'clock at the car park?"

"Great see you then."

Monday seemed to take forever to come to its dull conclusion and Sarah
tripped off home thinking about what she would wear the following day. She
woke early to make sure she had time to prepare properly. It was going to
be a hot day so she chose a bright, knee-length, summer dress with large
yellow flowers. She half thought about wearing stockings but then realised
what might happen if Kent misunderstood especially if they were alone as
they were likely to be.  In the end she picked out a pair of white tights
and white shoes. She also pulled out a panty girdle she had bought a few
weeks before at a time she was feeling less confident about her appearance.
She had no real need for the garment as it was intended, she had a
beautifully slim figure but she noticed how constricting it was especially
underneath, pushing her extra bits nicely out of the way. She pulled it on
over her pink nylon panties and made sure she was well tucked up inside.
It felt very tight on her but she slid her palm down between her legs and
could feel no trace of her boyhood, it even gave her a better feminine
shape. She looked in the mirror and felt good.

Once again someone seemed to be attracted to her. To Sarah, the alta ego.
Her recent admirers had never met Simon, had no knowledge of that past
life. She looked again from her toes to the tip of her head. She looked
good. Beautiful even. Men had said so. Andy, Phil and now Kent not
forgetting Ben of course but that was different. Kent was nice,
uncomfortable at times but nice and good looking. She hoped he would think
she was nice too. That he would like Sarah as well as ...what?.. not
Simon... but what. She shuddered. How would she tell him. He needed to
know. She wanted him to know. He must know but how? Oh well not today
anyway. Another day ... maybe.

Like Monday the morning went slowly until it was time to go the shops. She
bought some smoke salmon and cream cheese bagels, chicken tikka, crisps,
some cakes and a bottle of Medoc. She had remembered to pack the cork screw
and a couple of plastic glasses the night before. Kent was waiting in the
usual spot in the car park and opened the driver's door for her. As she
walked round the car they kissed.

"mmm delicious and I be the foods good too," said Kent sliding his hands
over her pert bum.  Perhaps the panty girdle was a good idea after all
thought Sarah.

She took the car nervously out of the town centre and into the
suburbs. They were soon on to the dual carriage way and Kent suggested she
'open it up'.

She pushed on the accelerator and felt the car respond under her. She had
never driven anything like this before and she felt the thrill as it pushed
her back into her seat.  Suddenly she realised the needle was pointing to
over one hundred and took her foot off the pedal with a jerk that threw
Kent forward.

"What's the matter?" he asked regaining his stomach.

"Nothing, just didn't realise how fast I was going"

"Well take it easy, you nearly had me through the screen." He sounded
annoyed.

She kept the speed to around eighty and were soon on the outskirts of
Norwich. Her concentration during the rest of the journey meant that she
had not noticed her dress ride up her thighs showing more than she would
have liked. Kent noticed though which made the trip even more enjoyable for
him.

He directed her round the town and they headed out past Wroxham to Barton
Broad. She had no idea where they were but Kent seem to know his way. She
wondered how. He directed her on to a side road and then into some woods
where they parked. It was a short walk through the trees to the bank of the
man-made lake. They stopped on the grassy verge for a moment and Sarah
noticed a sudden peace descended all the more palpable after the noise off
the road.  The sky was cloudless and the sun felt hot that afternoon. All
she could hear was the sound of the water birds calling to each other on
the far side of the lake. It was idealic.

Kent placed the car blanket he had brought on the ground and they unpacked
the bag. They chatted about not very much and Sarah learned nothing of the
trip Kent had just made. He wasn't evasive as such but simply managed to
steer the conversation back to Sarah and what she had been doing since they
had last met. They soon finished the food and the wine packing the last
bits of rubbish away in the bag. The afternoon wore on getting warmer if
anything and they both felt drowsy. Kent took of his T shirt while Sarah
watched. His chest was muscular and his stomach was flat and firm. He had
also acquired a recent tan probably from his trip to Spain although Sarah
was under the impression he had been busy. He got a bottle of sun tan oil
from his bag and slowly rubbed it in. Her breaths became short as she
watched him tip the oil into his palm and slid his fingers over his solid
chest making sure he covered every inch. He appeared to be concentrating on
the job in hand but he knew she was watching. He could see she was excited
which of course was his intention.

Sarah sat quite feeling a nervous tingling all over. Kent put the bottle
away and lay back against a tree stump. He tapped his lap with his hand and
Sarah slid over to him and put her head on his thigh. They both dosed in
the warm sun listening the water lapping on the bank. Half an hour later
Sarah came to and opened her eyes. She saw Kent was still asleep. She slid
her had onto to his stomach and rubbed him gently moving slowly towards his
chest. As she flicked his nipple with her finger he opened his eyes and
smiled.

"Come her gorgeous," he whispered.

Sarah moved up beside him and they kissed. Long and deep. Slowly.
Noiselessly. She continued to massage his chest playing with his
nipple. His hand slid down her dress on to her leg. He caressed her knee
and then slid under her dress. She put out her hand and held his wrist.

"Kent, no," she held his hand firm.

"What's the matter. I've a strong feeling you really like my hands on your
legs, or am I wrong?"

"No, its just..." She couldn't think what to say. She moved close to his
ear and then whispered.  "It's a bad time in the month."

"Oh, I didn't realise." He stopped suddenly and like many men did not know
how to react.

She snuggled in to his neck. "But that doesn't mean..." she whispered in
the other ear as she leaned over him and slid her hand into the top of his
jeans.

It took him a moment to realise what she was saying but her hand sliding up
and down his growing cock confirmed what she had in mind. Well she thought
he may not be able to have me as he wants but this will feel just as
good. She undid the buttons of his trousers very slowly. They were tight
against his bulge which made it even more sensual for him. She then pulled
down the front of his pants and took his hard cock in her hands stroking it
until it was at its full, solid length.

She was pleased that she was so obviously turning him on and she kept
rubbing, almost too hard.  She saw him twitch. The effect was electrifying,
his cock was harder than it had ever been and the cum-wet head was
glistening in the sun light. She moved her face nearer to him and slipped
the end into her mouth and sucked hard before taking it out again
continuing to work her hand up and down his shaft. More strokes and she
slipped it in again, sucking twice this time and pulling it out once
more. Kent could hardly control himself. He grabbed her hair with both
hands and pulled her towards him trying to push inside of her but she
resisted. Eventually she pushed her mouth over him and left it there,
sucking hard and rotating her head around his now dripping cock head. She
continued rubbing, up and down his length gripping tightly and then
relaxing her hand and with each stroke, she pushed her head further down
his shaft.

She was excited herself now and looked up. Kent had his head back and his
eyes closed. Still stroking and moving her head further and further down
his length she now had all of him inside her throat. She rotated once more
and then pulled completely back before lurching forward and repeating the
motion.

"I'm cumming," moaned Kent, "your making me cum." She felt him lurch upward
one more time and then lay motionless for about three seconds. She knew
what was about to follow and pushed her mouth onto him once more so that he
could pump his cream straight down her throat. Finally he came gushing into
her for a full thirty seconds before stopping.

"Urrrrrg, that was out of this world. Where did you learn that?" He pulled
up his pants and clipped the buttons back together. "That was wonderful. I
can't wait for the real thing."

Neither could Sarah but unfortunately she couldn't provide the real thing
he wanted unless she could convince him that she had something just as
good.

Once again he disappeared and just as before she never heard from him for a
week or so and then he called suggesting they go to the cinema. She was
beginning to get used to it now and she liked him a lot. The latest James
Bond film had come to town and he couldn't resist them. It was probably the
fast cars she thought.

The following Saturday she had got the bus in town and met Kent at the
cinema. His hands were all very her from the start of film and it was
obvious he wanted more than he had on the previous date.  She began to feel
uncomfortable. It was a late film and it was by the time they emerge into
the bustling streets the pubs and restaurants were closing. They had both
left their cars and had to get the bus back home which was in opposite
directions. Her bus stop was deserted and located in a dark back street. It
wasn't due for another fifteen minutes so they walked a few yards further
on and stopped in a dark office doorway.

She looked around but the streets bad cleared. He pulled her to him and
their lips came together. His tongue pushed into her mouth and his hands
held her waist. She closed her eyes and dreamily held him hardly feeling
his hands sliding over her hips and pulling her dress slowly up with his
strong fingers until he could feel her beautifully rounded bum through the
smooth nylon of her tights.

Suddenly she knew she had to stop him before it was too late but this felt
so good, so exciting; she let him continue. Her own hand slid down to feel
the enormous bulge in his trousers and she gently rubbed him until it was
hard just like it had been at the lake. He groaned and she could feel his
hand moving around to her front. She wanted to tell him, she wanted him to
accept her. She had thought about telling him tonight. She even had a plan
of sorts but it didn't included what was happening now. Perhaps once he
realised what her secret was everything would be fine.  She felt his finger
slide into the waist of her tights and between her legs. She was only
wearing the flimsiest of panties which hid nothing. She was already hard
from the excitement but his fingers caused her to throb noticeably.

He stopped abruptly. His hand moved no further. His lips were still
touching hers but they were not kissing any longer. She saw him slowly open
his eyes and it felt like she was holding a block of ice.  His hand gripped
her cock painfully hard and he could feel the weight of her balls, there
was no mistake. He pulled away and she tried to smile but it died on her
lips. She began to realise that the situation she had allow to be created
was getting out of control.

His hand squeezed once more as to confirm what the nerves in his fingers
had already passed to his confused brain and he pulled his hand out from
under her dress letting it fall back into place.

"What the ..." He said but not finding the words he needed.

"Kent, I meant to tell you..." Except she could see he wasn't listening.

"What are you..." She looked at his eyes, they were wild now. Wide and
staring.

He stepped back and looked her up and down. It unnerved her. She felt his
eyes entering her, discovering the secrets of her very soul although the
biggest secret she possessed was now known to him.

"Jesus, your just a fucking poof." He wasn't shouting but his voice was
raised, slow and deliberate.

"I've been dating a fucking POOF."

All the emphasis went on the last word and she was worried. She knew he was
volatile, he had shown that side to himself often enough, even violent if
he wanted to be.  She was now beginning to get fearful.

"Bloody hell," he looked around at the audience that must be laughing at
him but there was no one there. "I've been dating a fucking queer."

"Kent, stop saying that. I'm not a ... gay. I'm a woman, a girl. Its just
that..."

He looked at her again but this time it was as a stranger. She never saw
him pull his arm back, she only saw the flash of his sleeve and for a
second she was confused. The next moment she felt dizzy as the air escaped
her lungs and then the pain in her midriff grew. It rose up and washed over
her and she started to lean forward. The punch was hard anyway but more so
because she wasn't expecting it. Her legs were no longer supporting her and
she slid slowly down the wall she had been leaning on. She reached on the
floor and lat in a heap like a rag doll that had been tossed into a
corner. After the second wave of pain she felt sick. She wrenched but there
was nothing inside of her to bring up and the action brought on mores waves
of pain. She did not see him lift his leg indeed she saw or heard nothing
of what went on next.

"Hey you, leave her alone," Kent stopped and turned.

"Mind your own fucking business." He said but looked down at Sarah with
utter contempt.

"If you ever breath a fucking word of this to anyone I'll kill you. Do you
understand?" He leaned foreword and spoke to her in a very low but menacing
whisper.

Sarah was sobbing now. She hadn't really understood what he was saying but
something deep inside of her knew the answer must be 'yes'. The sound
slowly left her lips.

"Just remember, that's all." He turned and was gone.

A minute later the middle aged lady had caught up with her.

"Here let me help you, are you aright?"

"Yes, I'm fine" Sarah got up although her legs were still shaking. She
leaned against the wall and coughed trying to be sick again but failing
with more pain welling up inside of her.

"What was it a mugging? I couldn't really see" the woman asked picking up
Sarah's bag.

"Y Y Yes, he tried to take my hand bag," She was gratified that she could
disassociate herself from him, "but it's OK he didn't get anything."

"Lucky I came around the corner when I did. Young louts I expect. We must
call the Police."

"No, we can't" she said panicking "I.. I didn't see him, I don't want any
trouble I just want to go home, please, just walk with me to the bus stop
and then I will be OK."

"Are you sure? We shouldn't let them get away with it you know."

The lady brushed the last of the dirt from Sarah's coat and they walked the
few yards to the bus stop.

She arrived home and everyone was in bed. She crept up the stairs,
undressed and showered. It was as if she had to rib herself of every part
of him. The bruise on her stomach was just starting to come out and the
dull pain had subsided slightly. She stood there, unmoving for twenty
minutes just letting the hot water take her to a nicer place away from the
pain. She found a plain night dress and climbed into bed burying her head
in the pillow but the painful thoughts would not go down. She began to
think about the future and what she would do. How could she ever find a boy
who would accept her as she was? Her mind was in turmoil. The pain put any
memories of Ben and the recognition he had of her, out of her reach. Now a
depression crept over her slowly like a dark cloud on a bright day, until
she felt utterly miserable and began to cry.  Softly. The tears disappeared
straight into the pillow without making themselves known. This was not the
physical pain which she could stand but the pain of confusion and
uncertainty.

Maybe it was time for Simon to come back and take over again. Being Sarah
was great but it was not worth this. How could people be so horrible? She
had done no harm to anybody in her young life. It just wasn't fair. Her
sobs were deep now but muffled by the pillow.  What was she going to
do. She couldn't go forward and did not want to go back. The next morning
she would tell her Mum it was all over. Sarah would be no more. Slowly the
sobs eased and the pain subsided enough to allow sleep to wash over her and
take her back to that place where there was no pain.

The next morning she got up and dressed as usual making triply sure her
make up was perfect and the clothes were well matched. Her heart was not in
it though, she was dressing by instinct. She had changed her mind about
telling her Mother, for the time being anyway. She needed to think things
through a bit more. She got the bus to work which was busy and she had to
stand up. She couldn't help but notice an ad at the bottom of the page of
the newspaper the man next to her was reading -- Transsexual and
Transgender Support Group, Need help? -- it said in large letters. She
tried to see the telephone number but the man turned the page before she
could memorise it. It looked liked one of the many free papers that were
full of ads but he got off the bus before she even had an opportunity to
see it's name. Dam, she thought, they might be worth calling if only to be
able to tell some one about what had happened. She had no one else.

She tossed the idea around in her mind all morning and, when lunch time
came and the office emptied out, she called Directory Enquires. They gave
her a number for the organisation she had seen advertised which she wrote
it down on her desk pad. She would not ring them from here, though, she
would use her mobile when she was alone.

The rest of the day went slowly and people had noticed she was quite but
they were unaware of the depth of sadness that kept welling up inside of
her. Later that evening alone in her bedroom and with the room in darkness
she rang the number. She did not want to look at herself. She felt like s
freak.

"Hello, Trans-Gender Support, how can I help?" A ladies voice answered.

Now that she had made the call she didn't know what to say. Her mind raced
but, like a car with its wheels in the sand, she got nowhere.

"Hello, anyone there?"

"Yes," Sarah heard a very quite voice say but it didn't feel like hers.

"Is there something I can help with?" The voice at the other end suddenly
became soft and reassuring.

"I don't know," said Sarah.

"How about telling me your name?"

"It's Sarah."

"Hello Sarah, I'm Emma. Is there something you would like to talk about
now?" The voice was friendly and encouraging.

"Yes, I suppose so. But I don't know where to start."

"That's OK. Would you like to tell me about Sarah first. How old is she and
how long has she been around?

"She's nineteen and has been dressing as Sarah for about two and half
years, I guess."

"and is she around all the time now or just some of the time." The voice
was silky, gently pulling her in.

"She.. I .. I became Sarah full time about three months ago."

"Do you live on you own?"

"No, I am with my parents and they have been helping me."

"Gosh, you are a very lucky young lady. Most people like us have to live in
the closet for ages, sometimes forever."

"What do you mean, like us? Are you a trans..." her voice trailed away as
suddenly it didn't seem right to pry.

"Transsexual? Yes. I am due to have the operation next year."

"Oh, so you know what I'm going through then."

"No, not at all. Everyone is different. Tell a bit more about yourself.
Although we are similar no two people's experiences are the same. What made
you call tonight? Has something happened?" It was as if Emma could read her
mind but not in a threatening way.

"Yes, something happened last night and I don't know what to do."

"Would you like to tell me about it," asked Emma softly sensing that it was
something significant.

"Well," Sarah took a deep breath but felt the tears welling up inside of
her again.

"Take your time, I'm here for you now. Tell me what happened from the
beginning. There's no rush."

Sarah sniffed and started from when she first met Kent. She also wove in a
few other significant points and finished right up to date, telling Emma
what she was feeling now, after what Kent had done to her.

"Oh dear I am sorry?" said Emma when she had finished.

"I thought he was nice."

"Many men have difficulty with this subject and its not always easy to
predict how they might respond."

"Yes I see that now," Sarah said in a low voice.

"So first things first, do you need to see a doctor?" asked Emma

"No, I'm alright now, I'm a bit bruised but the pain has nearly gone."

"Be careful, its easy to cause internal problems with a punch. If it seems
to take longer to heal than it should or if the pain comes back then
straight round to your GP.  Promise?" Emma sounded insistent so Sarah
agreed.

"Good, now how's Sarah doing and what does she need right now?" Emma
continued.

"I was thinking of going back to being Simon." Sarah replied softly.

"Would that be possible?"

"Yes I think so."

"Is that what you want to do?" Sarah thought for a long time but Emma did
not interrupt.

"No. I like being Sarah. It feels right. Natural. I want to carry on but I
want to be a girl in every way and to meet boys," she was upbeat now but
then stopped and thought for a while, "I suppose that's never going to
happen," she sounded despondent once again.

"Listen, a lot has happened to you already and you are still very young.
There is much to learn for any teenager growing up and, sometimes, it isn't
easy. You've decided to add another dimension to your life, for the time
being anyway and now you are learning about relationships, communication
and lots of other things that we all must learn about to be able to live
amongst other people in the world successfully."

"Yes I see." Said Sarah thoughtfully.

"There will be many boys and men who will not have a problem with your
position. Obviously lots would but some won't. There are even some who go
out of their way to meet transgendered females." Sarah nodded and
remembered Ben.

"Have you thought about the future?"

"In what way?" Sarah was confused again.

"Do you want to be a woman permanently?"

"I...I don't know. I haven't really thought about it." She told Emma about
the agreement she had with Clair and Richard.

"Ok that's fine. In which case you need to be aware of what the people
around are assuming when they see and meet you and what you are prepared to
let them continue believing."

"Yes," Sarah was beginning to feel better now.

"...and contrary to many myths TG girls don't jump into bed at the first
opportunity when they meet a boy so you don't have to either." Sarah
laughed.

"What has happened has happened. It's too late to put the clock back and
change things but you can learn from the experience. Think about how you
would like to handle things differently next time, if there is to be a next
time. Many people have all sorts of secrets or something in particular they
must say to a partner before a relationship can move on and the other
person may not always like or accept what they hear. That is their
prerogative of course. If you want things to go further with someone then
have a strategy, work out what could go wrong and how you might deal with
that.  Above all make sure you don't leave yourself in a vulnerable
position -- physically or mentally. Do you have any friends apart from your
parents who know about you position?"

"No there's no one else"

"You might consider joining a support group. I could give you details if
you like."

"Yes I understand," Sarah said almost, but not quite smiling. "I could do
that."

"You sound intelligent I'm sure you'll do fine. How are you feeling now?"

"Much better thank you. I guess I was just expecting everything to be
perfect." Said Sarah.

"Perfection comes to those that work at it, I always find. Is there
anything else I can help with?"

"No I'm fine now and I know what to do. You've been a great help. Thank
you."

"Ok that's good and if you need to talk again just ring this number and ask
for me. Take care."

Sarah put the phone down and pondered on the conversation for a few
minuets.  Of course, it is Kent who has the problem not me, she realised
and I'll take things as they come and see what happens. It would be nice to
have a friend who she could share her secret with though.


Deedi also has her own story called Deedi Emerges.
Any comments and feedback gratefully received robz8000@hotmail.com

The final part of the trilogy telling how the two girls cope with their new
lives together will be called -- Coming Home.